The story is…

Today…The last few weeks have been an emotional roller coaster of unimaginable portions, and have pushed me to my breaking point where up is down, and down is up. I felt like I’ve lived 10 lifetimes and that every decision I made has life history changing consequences. A few years ago I was lucky enough to find J through a random playlist and I instantly connected with the man, the music, and his story. Instantly I felt like he was reading my journal about my story and was telling my story because I was lost and voiceless… if you know my story I was at #ROUTE91 along with 22K framily and we were having the time of our lives and living the best weekend of my life, got my dream job offer literally moments before everything changed in 11 minutes of time. A couple of random strangers that became family helped me pick myself up and start what’s now known as www.lovewinsofficial.org and helped bring me back from the edge, and 4 plus years ago I found myself in such a dark place I was sitting in my garage planning a permanent solution based on a temporary emotion because it didn’t matter who I helped, how many people we helped, or the passion I had for the mission, I was broken, lost, and adrift in a sea of overwhelming emotions. I was sitting in my first home I had bought and trying to figure out how to end it all without my kids finding me first. And the universe sent me a sign, LITERALLY… by this time I was all in on the J train and had alerts set for anytime he dropped anything new because I just felt so connected to him and the music. He posted “Save Me” taking a chance and even said hey guys here is something new and don’t know if it will be on the album. That song has stayed on repeat for almost 4 years strong and my connection with him, the music, and the journey have been my saving grace at the darkest of times through his therapeutic music. I did something really crazy on this day in the video, I went right after work, stood in line for over 10 hours just to keep a promise I made to him literally a year to the day before this show. When you are given a sign from the universe like THE SONG of your story, hold onto it with everything you have, chase your dreams, fight your demons, share your story with the world because WE ALL NEED TO KNOW THAT WE ARE NOT THE ONLY ONES who aren’t ok, but we will be ok! J SAYS SO! Preach bubba! I’ve been told I’m clout chasing, fan boying, super fan, seeking validation, even that I was broken and seeking the world to fix me. I got front row like I always try to do when J is in town to keep my promise Bubba. I don’t care if it’s a back yard bbq, dive bar, sold our world events brother, God willing, any place, any time, any where, I will always be there for you, like your music has been there for me! I shouted J “Your music saved me!” I don’t know if you knew it was me, but your response was, “No bubba, you saved you, my music helped you through it!” So if it’s meant for you to see this message, than the universe will make it happen, like it did last time almost 18 months ago! Love you bubba, love you 36 HOUR BAND for letting me rock out with you every time, singing off key, crying ugly crying, making new friends listening to you guys, standing in line, making new connections with the crew, and building a circle of friends that will help me change the world! “A random act of kindness WILL change the world!” We are living proof of it! We got a date in So Cal!