Trying To Make Friends in Your 30s

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  • Опубликовано: 2 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 84

  • @troy6600
    @troy6600 2 месяца назад +42

    45 year old skater here, drank hard for 15 years puffed tough for 25 years, completely sober now. Your last few videos hit home really hard. I appreciate it. Thank you.

    • @ZackDowdy
      @ZackDowdy  2 месяца назад +2

      Much love, PMA!

  • @spencernuzzi
    @spencernuzzi 2 месяца назад +19

    Lucky to call u my friend big dawg! 🙏

    • @ZackDowdy
      @ZackDowdy  2 месяца назад +3

      Likewise my guy!

    • @shaunvanslyke6386
      @shaunvanslyke6386 2 месяца назад

      Why are big dogs obsessed with big dogging people

  • @djweeks_maui
    @djweeks_maui 2 месяца назад +21

    Not sure what you and the wife's situation is but having kids opens you up to a lot of new friendships and bonding. As well as a perspective change. Especially when the critters get old enough to skate!! I didn't even skate until 51yrs. Started taking my son to the skate park and could not just sit on the sidelines. Now I have a ton of new friends in my 50's. All the kids and other parents and young adults like you that rip have all turned into a whole new group of friends.They mentor me in skating and I give them a life perspective because of my age and life experiences. I live in Lahaina and our skate community showed up last weekend and cleaned our skate park up 1 year after the fire that destroyed our town and cut off access to our skate park. What a powerful day it was. Many hands made quick work. Next week it is officially open again. Your videos have inspired me and have helped me progress!! I've watched you and your channel progress and change too. Stay stoked, you are an inspiration!!

  • @bullit4x
    @bullit4x Месяц назад +1

    Try it in your 50’s (52). Got sober 15 years ago. Left my hometown 15 years ago (Santa Cruz ) because I was dying and my “friends” were enablers not supportive. So I moved to a tiny mtn town in North Carolina and haven’t looked back. It’s hard man. My best friend, my 17 year old catahoula died Dec 27th so it’s pretty much just me, my racing dh MTB and skating. Been pushing since 78.

  • @insanogeddon
    @insanogeddon 2 месяца назад +5

    Core advice here is the simple line: "having a good relationship with yourself .. make you the best potential ... "
    EVERYTHING

    • @CurbBlurbs
      @CurbBlurbs Месяц назад

      Best post yet! This x 100000000… if you’re looking for someone to fill some void, or gap that hasn’t been filled, you’re fooling yourself but even worse; you’re wasting time.

  • @theaverageoldguy
    @theaverageoldguy 2 месяца назад +7

    Totally agree with the age difference comments. I am a 63 year old skater returning to the sport after many years and had some real reservations about going to my local park for the first time knowing it was all going to be younger skaters. Now almost a year in, I know most of the kids on a first name basis and look forward to seeing and skating with them every time I go. I think men have a tougher time in general making new friends when we get older, for me at least, its always when I am doing some physical activity and meet other guys into the same thing so yeah the shared interest goes a long way in meeting and making new friends. Great video!

    • @ZackDowdy
      @ZackDowdy  2 месяца назад +1

      Couldn't have said it better my man!

  • @robertborden2666
    @robertborden2666 2 месяца назад +3

    I came back at 43. At 47 I have young and old friends at several of the parks. I got recognized an hour away from home for skating! I meet people professionally, skating, kids’ schools, music/dancing, and scouting. It’s all one big community to me. I love it. I knew so few people in my 20s. Now I’m literally everywhere.

    • @CurbBlurbs
      @CurbBlurbs Месяц назад +1

      Loll I love that last line;.. now I’m literally everywhere! What a great way to exprsss that. I know what you mean. I’m 48. And came back at 37. And it’s been a slappy relationship ever since

  • @kennynewell85
    @kennynewell85 2 месяца назад +2

    I actually find it way easier to make friends as an adult than I ever did as a kid. You seem super cool Dowdy. I’m sure anyone who calls you friend feels blessed.

  • @phidipidies
    @phidipidies 2 месяца назад +1

    Man, all these vids recently are hitting home. 33 years old, moving Back home to Canada next month after living in Australia for the last 5 years. Scared shitless to start over. Also facing recent sobriety, so that weighs heavy. So good to just hear someone else and not feel alone in it all. Cheers Zack, keep pushin.

    • @CurbBlurbs
      @CurbBlurbs Месяц назад +2

      Dude just stay busy and get obsessed on skate … you’ll remain narcotic free

  • @SatelliteSoundLab
    @SatelliteSoundLab 2 месяца назад +9

    tune out, drop in

  • @DirtySk8RatStaney
    @DirtySk8RatStaney 2 месяца назад +2

    I don’t really make new friends, and as Ive gotten older (I’ll be 41 next month) I either lose more every year or just don’t see or talk to them anymore. I do still have several friends that I skate with from time to time and have made several life long friends skating. Ironically enough I made a really good skate friend in my 30s when I shattered my ankle at a buddies garage ramp, and my now good friend Trevor gave me a ride to the hospital. I started that day not really knowing him, but after he was basically my ambulance driver we became great friends. It’s gotten even tougher over the last two years cause I switched jobs and now I’m on overnights. So my usual time to go skate is weekday mornings after I drop my son off at school. But every couple weeks I make it out to our local DIY spot for a session with the fellas. Although skating is our common denominator, a few years ago I was diagnosed with testicular cancer. And several of my skate homies pulled together and raised some money and really just rallied behind me. It was so awesome to know that even though we basically all bonded over a silly wooden toy, the bonds we made a super strong. Also it’s really cool to see younger skaters develop into gnarly ass shredders! Like I’ve got several friends that are half my age that I watched basically start skating, and now they absolutely RIP!!!

  • @SeanLewisMedia
    @SeanLewisMedia 2 месяца назад +2

    It would be sick if you guys threw together a session/meet up at a local park. Could be an awesome networking opportunity for making new friends🤙🏼

    • @ZackDowdy
      @ZackDowdy  2 месяца назад +1

      I would love that!

  • @keilyxbay3816
    @keilyxbay3816 Месяц назад

    'having a good relationship with yourself is gonna make you the best potential friend to someone else' -- this caught my attention as a good way to express the true part of the much more common and divisive: 'how can you expect anybody to love you if you don't love yourself?'

    • @keilyxbay3816
      @keilyxbay3816 Месяц назад

      and as a note to your sponsor that's the first time i haven't either skipped over a product promotion in a youtube video or just tried to ignore it lol... they should pay you more

  • @NOTsteveberra22
    @NOTsteveberra22 2 месяца назад +1

    these type of videos are great man!

  • @RidgedVector
    @RidgedVector 2 месяца назад

    keep this HIGH quality coming, i love you Zach, shedding real-er than most talk, let alone walk

    • @RidgedVector
      @RidgedVector 2 месяца назад

      i made a lot of friends in my nursing home

    • @KOL630
      @KOL630 Месяц назад

      @@RidgedVector😂

  • @warwicklilley4160
    @warwicklilley4160 2 месяца назад

    Maybe one of your best episode's yet ZACK Thankyou from NZ

  • @piscada182
    @piscada182 Месяц назад

    not 30 quite yet but i felt every bit of this video, i find so tough just getting out the car when the park is full, i be thinking sitting there and sometimes just go home and come back when its empty, seeing this helps breaking this habit next time.

  • @hiaceadventurevan3929
    @hiaceadventurevan3929 2 месяца назад

    Great video and advice. My issue is that I find myself as the only adult at the skatepark. Typically when I do meet people around my age who still skate, they don’t have their life together at all. I am in the Seattle area, Denver was the complete opposite! Lot of cool older people skating and help building/pushing the scene

  • @7plyTherapy
    @7plyTherapy 2 месяца назад +1

    I think age doesn’t matter in the park, but it does outside of skating, just because you are naturally in different stages of life. While skating with someone who is 16 years old doesn’t matter much (because the focus is skating), outside of skating they might have school and homework or other responsibilities, like they can’t go out at certain times, while me in my mid 30’s, I have kids, work, and other goals I want from life. To have friends you have to have some common ground. As far as the anxiety from making friends goes, COVID did make it worse, but so did social media, reaching out to others and talking to them naturally has become harder and more awkward, because talking to others is a skill, and skills need practice.

  • @6to8john
    @6to8john 2 месяца назад

    Struggle is real brother. 42 here, been skating for half my life. Trying to meet friends and people at the skate park or skate spot isn’t like it was back in the day. People hardly ever say hi to each other these days. I’m like a loner out there in my age range in my area.

  • @stay_troubled7735
    @stay_troubled7735 2 месяца назад

    I‘m happy for every RUclipsr who may get a video sponsor. Really hope that there is enough money in it, to make a good living. But “natural ads”? I don’t see that very often anymore and to be honest, I’d prefer clearly marked and demarcated advertising rather than blurred, branded storytelling.

  • @503punxoioioi9
    @503punxoioioi9 2 месяца назад +2

    What also sucks is when you've had a horrible job and changed to a bwtrwr one d made "friends" at work, get along, laugh and joke. You talk to people and get their number because they say they are into the same things you like in general (music, comedy, outdoors, etc). They say to text because they want to do stuff, then you text events/thingsto do and you absolutely never hear back or they're "too busy"... ALL YEAR LONG. Then you see them at work and you just wonder "WTF?!"

  • @lesmogoera5801
    @lesmogoera5801 2 месяца назад

    that line in the bowl was smooth

  • @BrewedMotorsports
    @BrewedMotorsports 2 месяца назад

    Another amazing vid thanks for sharing like you do ❤

  • @Late20sSkateboarder
    @Late20sSkateboarder 2 месяца назад

    Lookin good Dowdy!!!

  • @tmmjppsn
    @tmmjppsn Месяц назад

    For me the important thing is to not try too hard to make friends. The friendships that matter are the ones where things just click and it seems like you have been friends forever

  • @lvup7907
    @lvup7907 2 месяца назад

    so many cool tricks but i gota say that fs rock n roll in the small part of the bowl had so much style very cool

  • @SoapworthyProductions
    @SoapworthyProductions Месяц назад

    Only 2 more weeks in my 30's but you're absolutely right, teens will come up and start chatting with me or give me props and it goes both ways! Age blends and doesn't matter at the skatepark. I asked a group of HS kids how old they thought I was after I told them I recently learned boardslides. They said 27 haha. I'll take it as I'm 39

  • @willblackett4709
    @willblackett4709 2 месяца назад

    "Lizard" bank to ledge looks Fire !!!

    • @ZackDowdy
      @ZackDowdy  2 месяца назад

      Thank you, it's fun!

  • @Stevejams
    @Stevejams Месяц назад

    Hell yeah dude well said

  • @Love4boost
    @Love4boost 2 месяца назад

    I don’t skate with anyone. I prefer to be by myself. But I got my friend of over 20 years that I can always hit up. But you’ll always acknowledge when someone is really good especially if there’s an age gap. Spencer is 6 years younger than me. I never considered him a friend but he was the gnarly kid that always showed up all of us that were older. It’s actually crazy seeing him skate street at a high level now. I only knew him as a transition skater

  • @gBrueske
    @gBrueske 2 месяца назад +5

    Kids’ friends parents are the
    new friends adults make 😅

    • @CurbBlurbs
      @CurbBlurbs Месяц назад

      Or kids friends mom is new sex partner dad made .

    • @KOL630
      @KOL630 Месяц назад +1

      Yes so true but a lot of the time you’re only friends because the thing you have in common is the fact you have kids and you don’t share that much else in common. I only have two dad friends I know who skate and I have a hard time finding the time to meet them to skate and vice versa.

  • @shaunvanslyke6386
    @shaunvanslyke6386 2 месяца назад +1

    I gotta work on not drinking i mean i never on my own sometimes when others wanna its hard to sit it out. Same with smokin but that can cause anxiety for me more then calm it down.

    • @spooky.tattooer
      @spooky.tattooer Месяц назад +1

      I used to drink multiple times a week for over a decade. I just hit 1 year sober and I did it by finding stuff I liked to do more than drinking. I taught myself to tattoo and got back into skating, which are both things that suck to do hungover. Haha it keeps me motivated to stay sober. And as far as being around other people who are drinking, I started bringing cans of Liquid Death flavored sparkling water to parties. Having a can in my hand and sipping on it like I normally would with beer was a perfect substitute. Once you realize how annoying drunk people are when you're sober you won't wanna be one of them anymore. Lol good luck homie. You got this. 🤙

  • @DillRuss
    @DillRuss 2 месяца назад

    This is definitely a challenge I’m facing recently moving to a new state in my 30s. Hard to meet new like minded friends forsure

  • @503punxoioioi9
    @503punxoioioi9 2 месяца назад

    I've also tried to connect with local musicians in-person at shows or online. You never hear back. I grew up as a punk rock outcast just hoping to find other people into the same stuff. I just wanted to make friends to go to shows with. Nothing more.

  • @Brusselsproutsk8
    @Brusselsproutsk8 2 месяца назад

    Wise words 👏 👌

  • @opieangst
    @opieangst 2 месяца назад +1

    Man, I'm in N California and WISH I had friends that were like you. I'm about to get BACK into Skating after like 11 years. I'll be 30 in April, 2025.
    F-M silly.

    • @ZackDowdy
      @ZackDowdy  2 месяца назад +1

      Stoked you're getting back into it!

  • @averagealienSD
    @averagealienSD Месяц назад

    What park is this? Looks cool

  • @scottkeenan6339
    @scottkeenan6339 21 день назад

    That's how the pros do it 💥🤙

  • @503punxoioioi9
    @503punxoioioi9 2 месяца назад

    Everyone put here in Portland Oregon completely sucks. I got on meds for anxiety/depression, trying to make the effort to talk to morw people. I have conversation with people at shows/bars for a long time, we're into the same stuff. I'll text them and never hear back. Complete waste of time. If I don't talk to anyone at bars/shows then no one talks to me. It sucks. I'm reliable and show up a d try to be a good friend, but everyone is lame. The last person I met didn't text for 2 weeks, I took them out of my phone, they texted they wanted to go out, I show up to the event, then 30 minutes later they say they won't show up because they are smoking weed and watching movies. UGH!!!!

  • @komoonkh
    @komoonkh 2 месяца назад +3

    In my opinion, people overthink this. You just say something, I mean literally whatever comes to your mind and you will instantly know if the person wants to talk to you. It takes like two sentences to know. Maybe it is just me. I can connect with almost everybody,but I cannot do people that dont have a sense of humor. I make silly stupid jokes all the time and if the person doesnt react to it, I move on. I dont like “dry” people. Also people that cant make fun of themselves. It just doesnt work with my mind.

    • @503punxoioioi9
      @503punxoioioi9 2 месяца назад +1

      I try to make friends with whoever is into the same stuff and be open minded. It doesn't work. I've kind of given up. It's much easier to go out alone and leave when you want then dealing w/ 45 minutes of texts and then people flake or you never hear back.

    • @RexDavis415
      @RexDavis415 2 месяца назад +1

      ​@@503punxoioioi9Same. I just delete their number from my phone, I don't like time wasters.

  • @Camp2x
    @Camp2x 2 месяца назад

    Im in the same boat as nuzzles. My like only friend I met playing skate 3 we both play realistic and skate irl so it we just hit it off we've been friends for almost 5 years now

  • @rosstempletonogskater
    @rosstempletonogskater 2 месяца назад

    I just meet people and the skate parks, but some of them I never see again//// :( Zach, Is that Grass or Astro Turf in your backyard...Its super green, lookin like Astro Turf.

    • @ZackDowdy
      @ZackDowdy  2 месяца назад +1

      It's turf

    • @rosstempletonogskater
      @rosstempletonogskater 2 месяца назад

      ​@@ZackDowdyI'm Amazed you can afford to buy a house in Southern California. That alone could Create a RUclips channel

  • @Quicksk8reels
    @Quicksk8reels 2 месяца назад

    Will you make instructionals again or will your channel remain to be this way?

  • @barfthebarf
    @barfthebarf 2 месяца назад

    I often ask folks what their setup is.

  • @VICTOR947017
    @VICTOR947017 2 месяца назад

    YO! Zack Were is Big Al your friend these days? he did some brave and rad skateboarding on this chanel.
    Master without pads and helmet. Hope he is alive and kicking somwhere.
    YO! Good friends are hard to find!

  • @stickersteve007
    @stickersteve007 2 месяца назад

    im in my 30's...will you be my friend? lol. i dug the burnside video. im from the area

  • @indiopeltier9758
    @indiopeltier9758 2 месяца назад

    I'm 42 and damn all these young ones are into some weird crap haha , definitely hard to make homies as an OG

  • @benjaminreis7769
    @benjaminreis7769 Месяц назад

    What is magicmind

  • @mikehemens9359
    @mikehemens9359 2 месяца назад

    Try to make friends from outside of this sport/art. Skating is nice cause you know everybody and stuff but it can become easy to get led along into bs and ect.

  • @AnuarMayorga
    @AnuarMayorga 2 месяца назад

    I loved your last video, so honest and sincere. 45 yo in November. If you ever come to Ontario Canada. Amigo. Ill be your friend and skate buddy. My skating crew is my 13 yo son and me. No weed no alcohol. Pure life.👍🏼🫡🙂

  • @P1nt0707
    @P1nt0707 2 месяца назад

    Imagine if snoop dog took the advice and you see him taking health shots back to back instead of smoking on stage.

  • @Zephyrian1st
    @Zephyrian1st 2 месяца назад

    Being 30, skating its weird, i feel uncomfy when people are like, yea im 19...

  • @PhatallyFlawless
    @PhatallyFlawless 2 месяца назад

    Making new enemies in your 40s 😈

  • @NauticalNate
    @NauticalNate 2 месяца назад

    LIZRDDDDD

  • @thugwafflebro8062
    @thugwafflebro8062 2 месяца назад

    Rather be a Lone Wolf.

  • @hughwilla4744
    @hughwilla4744 2 месяца назад

    Mash

  • @Jay-wk9xj
    @Jay-wk9xj 2 месяца назад

    Kudos for doing you but stop calling it cannabis man you sound like a narc lol

  • @skatertrash4205
    @skatertrash4205 2 месяца назад

    30s you should be supporting your family