I worked with a group of women who would openly (negatively) comment about my frugal lifestyle choices. One in particular took it upon herself to state that I was lying when I said that I was debt free in my 40's. Guess who retired early and lives in the area where she can't afford to holiday. Hope that doesn't sound smug!
That's a great feeling! I had a call a few years back from someone offering to consolidate my credit card loans and store card debt. When I said I had neither they called me a liar and hung up!
I only discuss my frugal ways with like minded people. I think we all make our choices in life, I am happy with my choices which allows me to be financially independent and debt free, I really don’t concern myself with other peoples choices in life.
This is probably your best video! My husband and I fell into that same trap years ago. We spent 8 years "living the life" then one day I said I don't want this any more and my husband said ok do what you want. We sold everything ( almost ) and downsized, moved to a really small house, got out of debt and realized how foolish we were. That was over 25 years ago and we haven't regretted that decision. You speak with wisdom.
My father told me years ago only purchase 2x yearly income. When I purchased my home many people gave me grief because I got such a "small" home 1500 square feet with 3 bedrooms and 2 baths with 3 kids. I had a 6 figure job at the time. The bank offered me 5 X this amount I declined. I paid off the 30 year mortgage in 12 years and have not had a mortgage for 20 years and the kids moved out in less than 5years for college. I am so glad my home is paid for and I do not have to clean, heat, cool and maintain more. A blessing in retirement. Keep up the good work empowering others that more is not more less is financial freedom and emotional peace. MB
It truly is. Our household of two adults and one toddler waste a considerable amount. I'm always watching and reading on ideas to cut down on that waste.
The worst thing is that I myself have subjected other people to snobbery in the past. With age comes wisdom, I see it now. I no longer have any opinion on how people choose to live their lives, as long as it isn’t a danger or a nuisance to me, to their children and pets, to my loved ones, or to the environment. I am much kinder and less judgemental and it feels so much better to be that way. I live my life the way I want to and I have never been happier! Hell, I don’t even wear a bra any longer, its so much more comfortable. Thank you Jane, for continuing to clarify everything.
I remember my mom always answered those Monday morning work conversations what did you do this weekend her reply ( we as a family ) did yard work, we washed our cars, took the dog to the dog park, and for family fun on a Saturday night we made pizza from scratch and played good old board games. Thanks for being to mind some wonderful childhood memories.
Definitely keeping up with the Jones'is the biggest mistake. And feeling like they deserve all the luxuries that consumerism tells them they want! We are so very lucky to have a safe home over our heads our health and food on the table. People don't stop to see how lucky they are if they have these things x We need far less than what society leads us to want!
The first date with my husband, he picked me up in a Toyota Starlet, I was impressed! We went to a movie and ate at a chain burger establishment. I was in debt up to my eyeballs. 37 years later, retired at age 60, debt free and happy. I wish it for others. 💙
Thanks for sharing your story. My (now late husband) and I lived our dating and married life, raising our children, buying a small home, etc. I sold that home and bought a new one for cash. I am 100% debt free too. Feels great, doesn't it 🥰💐🌱🌞🌛✝💗🏜
@@momof2momof2 I’m sorry for your loss. My dad passed 11/19/20. My mom had been married to my dad since she was 17 years old, living in the same house since her momma brought her home from the hospital. It’s been hard for her. The best thing I tell my mom and my patients, remember he loved you and that’s the most important. I survived a divorce so I know what it’s like to not be loved. Take care of yourself, remember the love. 💙
I can relate to most of these, especially ‘Lifestyle Creep’. When I took early retirement from teaching, that all changed, because I was no longer surrounded by those people. Now older and wiser 😃
When I was a younger teacher, I never understood how my colleagues could afford to go on so many vacations and drive such fancy cars, etc. However, truth be told, I had a weakness for CDs and DVDs and my husband had his with computer equipment as our credit card would show. Fortunately, I came from a frugal family. Using my parents' example, we got over our dalliance with credit cards. Now that I'm a retired teacher, I am pleased that I didn't follow my colleagues' examples. My husband and I are now in a comfortable financial position. In sum, we made some mistakes, too. I thoroughly enjoyed your lesson for today.
When I tell people where we live they look skeptical but we bought a really nice house with a pool, large garden and great neighbors for cheaper than in the posh neighborhood. When I thrift store shop I buy the name brand clothes for pennies on the dollar, some even have the tags still on them, yes, I take the bus, no car, with the price of gas right now I'm glad..my daughter rides her bike to work, her coworkers are astounded yet she will own a house sooner instead of that new pick up or jeep in the parking lot. We are 4 generations into frugal living now and I couldn't be more proud.
I think a huge mistake people all around me make is updating their kitchens and bathrooms to the lastest trend. When their kitchen and bathrooms were perfectly functional. A paint job, a plant, vase of flowers, new light fittings or artwork would have been thousands and thousands of dollars cheaper.
You're awesome, Jane. Anyone looking down on you has a personality disorder. You are crafting a wonderful life that is admirable and, for your viewers, aspirational. ❤
This is such a good video! So many tips to take on board. I also love the word 'Spendy Society' I'm going to use that from now on. You used to be my English teacher in Plymouth years ago (2004-5 I think) and was one of the best teachers I have ever had. My partner and I are trying to be a bit more frugal in life especially as we want to be mortgage free asap. It is so true about the snobbery. I know a few people try to one up each other with houses, cars etc and I am so glad I don't tend to be fixated on those things as much. I want a new kitchen but ours works just fine, so I am currently researching on how to paint & repair my cabinets and do my own flooring. Thank you for these videos :)
Thank you Chantelle, I remember you and your class very well. I remember you showing me around the school when I arrived for my interview. You were a talented dancer as well as a great all round enthusiastic and friendly student as were all of your class. Thanks for sharing your story of avoiding snobbery and keep going with paying off that mortgage.
As a retired teacher, I know how gratifying it is when former students tell you how much you helped them. Congratulations, Jane on being a wonderful teacher; and thank you Chantelle for telling Jane of her impact on your life.
The must have culture is so difficult for many to resist. Many women at work pay out £65 for eyelashes every six weeks, they are on low wages, this is a high proportion of their pay.
The biggest thing I resent about snobbery is the way budget travel is looked down on. After all, if you're going to spend on luxury, what better thing than experiences rather than things. Travel is a beautiful way to understand your fellow man around the globe, and a great education for children. Personally, if it's clean, safe and the bed's comfortable, I'm great. And that can include a van or a tent. Get up at the crack of dawn and do and see all you can on foot, bus, or bicycle!!
Great video! It reminded me of the saying "We spend money we don't have, to buy things we don't need, to impress people we don't like (or in many cases do like but don't need those things to be liked) We find reviewing our spending and budget every two weeks keeps us on track. We recently paid off two debts and now have only a small amount of credit card debit to pay off and then it's all getting put to different savings accounts. I laughed when you referred to the bathroom as a sanctuary, when my four children were young I did look forward to a good soak to release the stresses of the day. Simple pleasures and a simple life.
We've been victims of life style creep. But at this point, I do not care what anyone else thinks of my life style. Fortunately, most of the people we know would never look down their noses because our car is older and we buy clothes at the thrift store and yard sales. We all brag about how much money we DIDN'T spend on the things we need.
I agree that above all of your videos, I enjoyed this video the most. You called a spade, a spade and left no stone unturned. Straight forward. That's what many of us need. I like the idea of debt snowball that you mentioned helped your family became debt free!😊
Jane you really hit the nail on the head with this topic - every single point you made rings true. Once I gave my head a shake about my financial situation (years ago now) this is what I used to say to ANYbody that threw their snobbish/persnickety comments my way, "For your comment to bother me, your opinion of me would have to matter...and it doesn't, so you have yourself a NICE day." I still say this when the occasion presents itself...works every time HAHAH
Great video! Seven years ago, when I needed to buy a car I had been saving and I did have a trade in but together they did not total enough to get what I needed. Also, because I was newly widowed I also felt that I needed to establish a credit rating in my own name and so made the decision that I was going to take a small loan to get the safe car I wanted. (I know some will disapprove of that decision, but it was mine to make I do not regret it). So, I approached my bank in advance to discuss the options before I alked tot he car dealer and, after running the numbers then bank told me that they would loan me up to .... $45,000.00 for a car!!!!! My jaw hit the floor! I couldn't imagine spending that kind of money on a vehicle, never mind borrowing that much. I ended up getting the car I wanted (and still have today) borrow just over $3,000.00 and paid it off in short order, giving me a good credit score. Still can not believe that number.
45 years ago when we bought our first house the bank approved us for 3 times our yearly income. We ended up getting a house more like one years income. Even that was a stretch as we were starting our family.
Jane, I am fairly new at finding your channel! As retired Seniors we got to this point by many many frugal ways, tips and reading and listening to people such as you and your husband who have accomplished it!!! Without applying these tips and changes to our lives, we would not be on track to be mortgage free Sept next year, even sooner if possible! We have very little debt otherwise, and both our car and truck were paid for in cash! We could not have done it without a lot of perseverance of actually applying what we learned, it and sticking to our budget! It can be done and we plan to keep questioning whether a purchase is a Need or a want??? Again Thank you for sharing your knowledge and journey! Stanley and Donna in the NE Georgia mountains🇺🇸
Lifestyle creep is a trap that is easy to fall into. I have been pressured by others to buy things they think I need. But they all have partners to share expenses with and I don’t. I simply can’t spend like they can and am not prepared to assume a large amount of debt.
Once again really valuable,wise content. If only…..if only I knew in my comparative youth what I know now I wouldn’t have wasted so much money……really just trying to impress people I didn’t really have any regard for. School gate mother’s back in the day . I just wish I could impart some of my wisdom on the young…..but would they believe me??? Possibly not . Once again Jane you inspire me, keep me focused and make me realise I am amongst friends ….kindred spirits. Thank you so much 💕🌷💕
Always enjoy your videos. So helpful or affirming that I’m on the right track. I just finished giving my social security dollars a job, mostly June’s bills and some of my sinking funds. As I get more and more into this budgeting tool, it’s getting easier and the money seems to last longer. It’s been a game changer for me. Keep up the great videos, please. They are so wonderful.
It’s the old ‘don’t judge a book by its’ cover’. Anyone looking at our life has no idea what we’ve been able to do financially because of our thriftness. Sometimes we laugh about it.
We all get to a certain place in our lives where other people's judgments doesn't matter much to us. I'm 75 years old and live on the old family homestead I inherited from my family. I too am debt free and live simply. Regrets from my earlier years? Of course! I simply gave away far too much of myself and my resources and didn't save or invest as much as I could have. . But I have ENOUGH and I am content! And that's important.
People have been and will always be the same through out time. In my opinion, If people are doing their best, living a clean, tidy life and have their financial ducks in a row to the very best of their ability then they are doing well. As we get older, we tend to not care about what others think. I spent years worrying and wondering what others thought about me and what I did. I'm 63 now and couldn't care less lol. It's freedom. One thing I have noticed, is everyone has their issues and choices, which may or may not be right for others. When my husband was alive and we were raising our 2 children, we saved like crazy and spent wisely, and still gave our children everything, went on reasonable vacations etc. We bought a small home,and made it our own . Others were always on us about how we should spend more on extravagant things and a bigger home etc. Fast forward, my husband passed away, I sold our home for twice what we paid, and now I am completely debt free, and own a brand new home, 2 cars, and have a healthy savings and retirement. Wonderful video Jane. Well done !🥰💐🌱🌞🌛✝💗🏜🥰💐🌱🌞🌛✝💗🏜
Love this video! Agree with all the points you made...done most of them myself lol. Budgeting to zero has been the best thing I've done for my financial self ☺️
Well,Always very thankfull that you let us think,en rethink the things That we do. Always Look the Video twice.For the Things That I thought I perhaps missed. Thank you,and untill next time👍👍
The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today. Thx for your transparency. I've made all but one of those mistakes and they take work to dig out of. Im on that journey now. Thx for the info and willingness to share
You hit the nail on the head I'm constantly beating up myself for not saving as much as I should have, traveling a lot and buying a lot of things that I now realize we didn't need! We really did enjoy ourselves but I'm still beating myself up and treating it as a failure!
I know I've touched on this before, but snobbery is a huge issue where we live (wealthy part of SEast). We live on one fairly low government wage and enjoy our simple life. But, I am finding myself increasingly having to isolate myself from life around me as my values are so different ; I could not cope with the frequent comments I was subjected to or my failure to "join in" and "keep up". This has not been good for my well-being, mental health taken a real hit. I look forward to the day when my son finishes at school - GCSEs next year and A levels take it to 3 years - so we can move away. Luckily, my OH and son are in complete agreement with this. I know this sounds rather negative, but you encourage us to share and this is me responding and being open and honest.
It’s infuriating. At work, in life, on social media, those passive aggressive comments are demeaning and I’ve been there too. It’s awful. I love my very quiet life where I rarely see or speak to another human. Keeping our heads down is a matter of survival.
I just realized about the Diderot effect you mentioned just last year. I am now very aware of it. What i see in Florida is the massive amount spent on entertainment and coffee!
Jane, thank you for your kind words at the end. I am having a hard time forgiving myself for my stupid decisions over the past 5 years. I am living with the consequences and I feel so sad and, if I'm brutally honest, scared.
You can do it, I've been there keep watching channels like this and how to get out of debt, Our Simple Life, The humble Penny, Lara Joanna Jarvis... there's loads. Sell things that you don't use that you spent on and start over. The next 5 yrs can be better!
@@loveconnection1118 thank you. I have never had credit cards, I have no debt, already sold what isn't essential and I have 2 jobs. It's not the how to... that is my issue. It's precisely because I know better that the emotional part is hard. "The next 5 years can be better" This quote you have given me is a gift, thank you.
Lifestyle creep and particularly 'I work hard so I deserve it" are the biggest money thieves of all time. Fortunately I have always been a regular saver though 🙂
Savings. This is what I did until I found your videos recently. I was always going to save whatever was left at the end of the month, and never was anything left.
Nailed it Jane!! I have little sayings that I scribble on post it notes and stick up, one a day, to either make me laugh, or remind me why we did what you've done. Today's is "When you truly don't care what anyone else thinks of you, you have reached a dangerously awesome level of freedom". Yesterday's was "Some people are so poor, all they have is money". Loving all the videos of your journey, think I need to go right back to the very first one and watch them in sequence. What was the first one you did?
I’ve gotten sucked into what I call instant shopping on Amazon because it delivers next day. But the absolutely most stupid has been home shopping on QVC and their evil FLEX PAYS. By making easy monthly payments I must have spent well over $50,000 US. So instead of owning a home or driving a car, I am now paying them for junk I no longer own. It’s an addiction I equate to gambling or alcohol.
I really need to change my profile picture. My hair is very short, and very grey. Another great vlog Jane. I love my new frugal, debt free life! If only I could get my daughter and grandchildren on board!
Greetings... I love the confidence in which you speak.Speaks volumes of the passion you have to educate through experience. My biggest mistakes are succumbing to the snobbery and being too hard on myself.It really affected my mental health.I am doing much better , your channel helps greatly. Blessings from S.A
You have made so many great videos, but this is certainly your best! In addition to your spot-on list of major money mistakes everyone makes at some point in their lives, I particularly love your reminder for people to have compassion for themselves. There is no sense in beating ourselves up over past errors and what is essential is to learn and improve over time! I have certainly made my share of some of these mistakes (and there remain areas of improvement), but I'm not losing any sleep over that! Fortunately, we've managed to avoid lifestyle creep, snobbery by living in rural SW France, where there is significantly less of that kind of social pressure. In any case, let the opinions of others be damned! They really don't get a say in how you choose to live your life! Keep up the amazing work! Your videos are a delight and inspiring for this admittedly not particularly frugal fan of yours! (It's a good thing that my husband sets a good example for me, given his very humble origins in a tough région parisienne neighbourhood. 😅)
Thank you for this, Jane. I can identify with so much of what you speak about. It is a relief to be free of the staffroom pressures. I am similar vintage and have succumbed to the pressure too. My life now is much less stressful if and I did not lose my real friends. No?thing like a simpler, afford.able life.
great content as usual. Since the Joneses dont 'rice'' me i dont have to please them. I'm happy with what i have and what i do. I used to be very upset with my grandmother and her 'sayings''. Now i understand where she was coming from.
Great video. As for Jonesing, you know what they say, if the grass looks greener over the fence, either it's fake or their water bill is higher :D We bought a small house and stayed in it, best financial decision ever.
Great advise. People are very judgmental, and I am glad that you stopped paying attention to them. After all, they do not pay your taxes or bills. Getting out of debt and living a frugal life style is the best way to live your life.
Hi. Yea it's amazing how our ego can take over. Lol. It's happened to me many times. Once I began truly budgeting my thoughts were on my money not "stuff". Good vid.
I'm so happy my mother told me when I was a teen ager that I should never look at what others have, she said it may just be that they owe more money than you do. Kinda related to your video.
This video was so well thought out and really stuck home, as I and so many others have made these same mistakes. My money mistakes haunt my thoughts at times, but I must remind myself that the past is gone and I can only control the present. My younger neighbors are always buying new cars, boats and campers and I wonder if these are purchases they really can afford or are they getting in over their heads with debt. All I know is that being debt free is a wonderful feeling of security and peace.
I think that mistakes people are making will come home to roost. We've made mistakes and had to face the consequences, learned and moved on. We'll make mistakes again I'm sure. It's human nature :) I think society as a whole in western countries has had a period of great luxury and we'll all be forced to live simpler in the future. It will be easier for those who've already adopted a simple, frugal life.
Spending on home decor has gotten crazy. I know of a couple who bought an expensive house (aren't they all these days!) and proceeded to tear out a perfectly good and beautiful 5 year old kitchen. Out went the oak cupboards, the granite countertops, etc. simply because they wanted it to be "their own" design. I know of someone else who over bought a large, expensive older home. It needs repairs which now they can't afford to make.
This video really did "speak" to me!! I have a very low income and have made a budget.Everything is just on paper, that's how I like it! My massive money mistake is I don't seem to be able to find a system of effectively tracking my budget! When I go over on a category I just let things slid out of control for that month 🙄😒 I'm so ready to change!!! With the energy crisis here in the UK 🇬🇧 the time for me is NOW!!! Any tips would be much appreciated 👍
Hi Jane & Mike. Another great video thank you. In the past I too have made some of these mistakes and have learned from them. Now on a smoother journey. x
Hi miss Jane. Thank you so much for you vlogs. I do enjoy it and am learning quite a bit. I do enjoy it when you do the budget break downs. It's helped me a great deal. From Audrey Cape Town South Africa
This is bang on, although it saddened me that people have been so cruel to you. Your smile lights up our screen! How much more healthy to be comfortable in your own skin and content with what is, than locked in a perpetual cycle of thinking it’s stuff which will make you happy. We’ve all been on that path though and how liberating to get off 🙏
Your videos are so nicely done..... enough consistency with introductions and interludes to create viewer comfort in knowing what to expect, yet always new and interesting content mixed in. Well done you two!
I'm SO happy to have found your video site. I'm 64 now and my late husband always said "If you can't pay cash then you can't afford it!" A lot of our friends always over-extended themselves to ' keep up with the Jones' and got into financial trouble.
Thanks so much to you both for sharing your tips. I don't often comment on youtube videos but have a couple of times on yours. I just had to. They're so good. I just keep coming back to the thought... Why don't they teach budgeting and tips as part of maths at school? It wouldn't take long and would emphasise the importance of maths. I wish I'd set a budget years ago. I thought I was really good with money but it would have really helped. I saved what was left as you mentioned, thinking this was good enough. Exactly as you made the point of. Anyway, I'll stop now as I'm sure you're busy. I just think at the moment with what's going on in the world, people need this help. For example a poor lady who I know of who can't pay her electricity and gas now, as she spent the UK government energy payments on a hot tub. That she's only used once. It's scary how people don't have the skills. Some is due to lack of capability to budget and understand money management. Can I buy you both a coffee? You've helped me so much. I have much less money worries than a had. Thank you so much.
I really enjoyed your video, thank you. I think all those mistakes easily happen because one simply does that what youre supposedly supposed to do... I am so happy for you both that you found your own path. I found mine too, it has been a bit bumpy at the start, with some steep learning curves but I figured out where I want to go and have a steady pase, my eyes focused on the path and enjoying my journey. I hope more people will find theirs soon, might take some hard work to get there but it is so worth it!
Well, I for one admire you. Plus, I think your hair looks great! I am currently working as hard as I can to save as much money as I can. I watch lots of videos like yours, but more for inspiration yhan tips, because I was raised by frugal parents and we have done just about everything. Keep the videos coming!
A Great Deal of Common Sense as usual. We never had savings and I couldn't understand why. People I worked with who were on the same wages and the same number of children could afford to go on an annual holiday and we couldn't. My wife refused to organise a budget. I told her that I was going to have ¹0% deducted straight from my pay ( I was the worker who brought in a wage, my wife worked at keeping the house ) and she had a crying fit. We started to get a buffer immediately.
I worked with a group of women who would openly (negatively) comment about my frugal lifestyle choices. One in particular took it upon herself to state that I was lying when I said that I was debt free in my 40's. Guess who retired early and lives in the area where she can't afford to holiday. Hope that doesn't sound smug!
That's a great feeling! I had a call a few years back from someone offering to consolidate my credit card loans and store card debt. When I said I had neither they called me a liar and hung up!
You Rock. Naysayers crumble.
I only discuss my frugal ways with like minded people. I think we all make our choices in life, I am happy with my choices which allows me to be financially independent and debt free, I really don’t concern myself with other peoples choices in life.
🤣 love it!!!
It does not sound smug. It sounds self-confident, hard working, dutiful, successful.
My car is 21 years old and I wear clothes from the thrift stores and I brag about it!
You should! You are doing a great service to the environment!
This is probably your best video! My husband and I fell into that same trap years ago. We spent 8 years "living the life" then one day I said I don't want this any more and my husband said ok do what you want. We sold everything ( almost ) and downsized, moved to a really small house, got out of debt and realized how foolish we were. That was over 25 years ago and we haven't regretted that decision. You speak with wisdom.
Thanks for sharing
My father told me years ago only purchase 2x yearly income. When I purchased my home many people gave me grief because I got such a "small" home 1500 square feet with 3 bedrooms and 2 baths with 3 kids. I had a 6 figure job at the time. The bank offered me 5 X this amount I declined. I paid off the 30 year mortgage in 12 years and have not had a mortgage for 20 years and the kids moved out in less than 5years for college. I am so glad my home is paid for and I do not have to clean, heat, cool and maintain more. A blessing in retirement. Keep up the good work empowering others that more is not more less is financial freedom and emotional peace. MB
In general biggest money mistake people make is in food shopping, the mountains of food waste is shocking.
It truly is. Our household of two adults and one toddler waste a considerable amount. I'm always watching and reading on ideas to cut down on that waste.
The worst thing is that I myself have subjected other people to snobbery in the past. With age comes wisdom, I see it now. I no longer have any opinion on how people choose to live their lives, as long as it isn’t a danger or a nuisance to me, to their children and pets, to my loved ones, or to the environment. I am much kinder and less judgemental and it feels so much better to be that way. I live my life the way I want to and I have never been happier! Hell, I don’t even wear a bra any longer, its so much more comfortable. Thank you Jane, for continuing to clarify everything.
I remember my mom always answered those Monday morning work conversations what did you do this weekend her reply ( we as a family ) did yard work, we washed our cars, took the dog to the dog park, and for family fun on a Saturday night we made pizza from scratch and played good old board games. Thanks for being to mind some wonderful childhood memories.
That sounds so fun! Nowadays there’s so much pressure to send money for entertainment!
Definitely keeping up with the Jones'is the biggest mistake. And feeling like they deserve all the luxuries that consumerism tells them they want! We are so very lucky to have a safe home over our heads our health and food on the table. People don't stop to see how lucky they are if they have these things x We need far less than what society leads us to want!
The first date with my husband, he picked me up in a Toyota Starlet, I was impressed! We went to a movie and ate at a chain burger establishment. I was in debt up to my eyeballs. 37 years later, retired at age 60, debt free and happy. I wish it for others. 💙
Thanks for sharing your story. My (now late husband) and I lived our dating and married life, raising our children, buying a small home, etc. I sold that home and bought a new one for cash. I am 100% debt free too. Feels great, doesn't it 🥰💐🌱🌞🌛✝💗🏜
@@momof2momof2 I’m sorry for your loss. My dad passed 11/19/20. My mom had been married to my dad since she was 17 years old, living in the same house since her momma brought her home from the hospital. It’s been hard for her. The best thing I tell my mom and my patients, remember he loved you and that’s the most important. I survived a divorce so I know what it’s like to not be loved. Take care of yourself, remember the love. 💙
I can relate to most of these, especially ‘Lifestyle Creep’. When I took early retirement from teaching, that all changed, because I was no longer surrounded by those people. Now older and wiser 😃
Me too
When I was a younger teacher, I never understood how my colleagues could afford to go on so many vacations and drive such fancy cars, etc. However, truth be told, I had a weakness for CDs and DVDs and my husband had his with computer equipment as our credit card would show. Fortunately, I came from a frugal family. Using my parents' example, we got over our dalliance with credit cards. Now that I'm a retired teacher, I am pleased that I didn't follow my colleagues' examples. My husband and I are now in a comfortable financial position. In sum, we made some mistakes, too. I thoroughly enjoyed your lesson for today.
When I tell people where we live they look skeptical but we bought a really nice house with a pool, large garden and great neighbors for cheaper than in the posh neighborhood. When I thrift store shop I buy the name brand clothes for pennies on the dollar, some even have the tags still on them, yes, I take the bus, no car, with the price of gas right now I'm glad..my daughter rides her bike to work, her coworkers are astounded yet she will own a house sooner instead of that new pick up or jeep in the parking lot. We are 4 generations into frugal living now and I couldn't be more proud.
I think a huge mistake people all around me make is updating their kitchens and bathrooms to the lastest trend. When their kitchen and bathrooms were perfectly functional. A paint job, a plant, vase of flowers, new light fittings or artwork would have been thousands and thousands of dollars cheaper.
In our last house in Cornwall we didn’t update those, we kept what we had. We painted the bathroom when we sold
That's the smart thing to do.
My parents always said not to try to "Keep up with the Joneses----the Joneses are in debt up to their eyeballs."
They are indeed!
Oh my goodness my mom use to say that to us girls when we were younger, my dad also use to say money don't grow on trees.
You're awesome, Jane. Anyone looking down on you has a personality disorder. You are crafting a wonderful life that is admirable and, for your viewers, aspirational. ❤
This is such a good video! So many tips to take on board. I also love the word 'Spendy Society' I'm going to use that from now on.
You used to be my English teacher in Plymouth years ago (2004-5 I think) and was one of the best teachers I have ever had.
My partner and I are trying to be a bit more frugal in life especially as we want to be mortgage free asap.
It is so true about the snobbery. I know a few people try to one up each other with houses, cars etc and I am so glad I don't tend to be fixated on those things as much. I want a new kitchen but ours works just fine, so I am currently researching on how to paint & repair my cabinets and do my own flooring.
Thank you for these videos :)
Thank you Chantelle, I remember you and your class very well. I remember you showing me around the school when I arrived for my interview. You were a talented dancer as well as a great all round enthusiastic and friendly student as were all of your class. Thanks for sharing your story of avoiding snobbery and keep going with paying off that mortgage.
As a retired teacher, I know how gratifying it is when former students tell you how much you helped them. Congratulations, Jane on being a wonderful teacher; and thank you Chantelle for telling Jane of her impact on your life.
Sorry. this was for another person's video.
Oh what a lovely story. Must have been great to suddenly find Jane on here 🥰. I need a kitchen too. But I’m not taking out debt for it 😊
The must have culture is so difficult for many to resist. Many women at work pay out £65 for eyelashes every six weeks, they are on low wages, this is a high proportion of their pay.
The biggest thing I resent about snobbery is the way budget travel is looked down on. After all, if you're going to spend on luxury, what better thing than experiences rather than things. Travel is a beautiful way to understand your fellow man around the globe, and a great education for children. Personally, if it's clean, safe and the bed's comfortable, I'm great. And that can include a van or a tent. Get up at the crack of dawn and do and see all you can on foot, bus, or bicycle!!
Well said
Great video! It reminded me of the saying "We spend money we don't have, to buy things we don't need, to impress people we don't like (or in many cases do like but don't need those things to be liked) We find reviewing our spending and budget every two weeks keeps us on track. We recently paid off two debts and now have only a small amount of credit card debit to pay off and then it's all getting put to different savings accounts. I laughed when you referred to the bathroom as a sanctuary, when my four children were young I did look forward to a good soak to release the stresses of the day. Simple pleasures and a simple life.
We've been victims of life style creep. But at this point, I do not care what anyone else thinks of my life style. Fortunately, most of the people we know would never look down their noses because our car is older and we buy clothes at the thrift store and yard sales. We all brag about how much money we DIDN'T spend on the things we need.
I agree that above all of your videos, I enjoyed this video the most. You called a spade, a spade and left no stone unturned. Straight forward. That's what many of us need. I like the idea of debt snowball that you mentioned helped your family became debt free!😊
The first date at a chain restaurant seems like a brilliant early filter mechanism. Find out the selfish shallow ones before they get a hold of you.
Jane you really hit the nail on the head with this topic - every single point you made rings true. Once I gave my head a shake about my financial situation (years ago now) this is what I used to say to ANYbody that threw their snobbish/persnickety comments my way, "For your comment to bother me, your opinion of me would have to matter...and it doesn't, so you have yourself a NICE day." I still say this when the occasion presents itself...works every time HAHAH
Great video! Seven years ago, when I needed to buy a car I had been saving and I did have a trade in but together they did not total enough to get what I needed. Also, because I was newly widowed I also felt that I needed to establish a credit rating in my own name and so made the decision that I was going to take a small loan to get the safe car I wanted. (I know some will disapprove of that decision, but it was mine to make I do not regret it). So, I approached my bank in advance to discuss the options before I alked tot he car dealer and, after running the numbers then bank told me that they would loan me up to .... $45,000.00 for a car!!!!! My jaw hit the floor! I couldn't imagine spending that kind of money on a vehicle, never mind borrowing that much. I ended up getting the car I wanted (and still have today) borrow just over $3,000.00 and paid it off in short order, giving me a good credit score. Still can not believe that number.
I don’t care about what other people think, I’m not here to please them😊
I’m glad to hear that
45 years ago when we bought our first house the bank approved us for 3 times our yearly income. We ended up getting a house more like one years income. Even that was a stretch as we were starting our family.
Jane, I am fairly new at finding your channel! As retired Seniors we got to this point by many many frugal ways, tips and reading and listening to people such as you and your husband who have accomplished it!!! Without applying these tips and changes to our lives, we would not be on track to be mortgage free Sept next year, even sooner if possible! We have very little debt otherwise, and both our car and truck were paid for in cash! We could not have done it without a lot of perseverance of actually applying what we learned, it and sticking to our budget! It can be done and we plan to keep questioning whether a purchase is a Need or a want??? Again Thank you for sharing your knowledge and journey! Stanley and Donna in the NE Georgia mountains🇺🇸
Nice to meet you and thanks for sharing
Lifestyle creep is a trap that is easy to fall into. I have been pressured by others to buy things they think I need. But they all have partners to share expenses with and I don’t. I simply can’t spend like they can and am not prepared to assume a large amount of debt.
Once again really valuable,wise content. If only…..if only I knew in my comparative youth what I know now I wouldn’t have wasted so much money……really just trying to impress people I didn’t really have any regard for. School gate mother’s back in the day . I just wish I could impart some of my wisdom on the young…..but would they believe me??? Possibly not . Once again Jane you inspire me, keep me focused and make me realise I am amongst friends ….kindred spirits. Thank you so much 💕🌷💕
Thanks Diana
I can't stop your videos till i hear the final woof !! In reply to snobs I say I'm eclectic, I'm not a sheep
Always enjoy your videos. So helpful or affirming that I’m on the right track. I just finished giving my social security dollars a job, mostly June’s bills and some of my sinking funds. As I get more and more into this budgeting tool, it’s getting easier and the money seems to last longer. It’s been a game changer for me. Keep up the great videos, please. They are so wonderful.
Nice to hear that Wendy
Hello Wendy, are you using a particular program to budget? Thank you!
Oh what a wonderful take on snobbery, "but" as we we get older we get "wiser"...
Thank you for this! You find out who your real friends are when you can be yourself and they see you for who you are and not what you have. ❤
It’s the old ‘don’t judge a book by its’ cover’. Anyone looking at our life has no idea what we’ve been able to do financially because of our thriftness. Sometimes we laugh about it.
Thanks for another honest and interesting video Jane. We've all made mistakes, it's how we pick ourselves up and go on that matters.
And keep picking ourselves up
My daughter used to work in London - and spent a lot on coffee (from a big brand) rather than taking instant coffee powder and making her own.
Hi Jane..Collene from Cape Town..South Africa ..I so had a good laugh for the bathroom sanctuary and war zone..Tx for your lovely vlogs
We all get to a certain place in our lives where other people's judgments doesn't matter much to us. I'm 75 years old and live on the old family homestead I inherited from my family. I too am debt free and live simply. Regrets from my earlier years? Of course! I simply gave away far too much of myself and my resources and didn't save or invest as much as I could have. . But I have ENOUGH and I am content! And that's important.
Well said Janet.
People have been and will always be the same through out time. In my opinion, If people are doing their best, living a clean, tidy life and have their financial ducks in a row to the very best of their ability then they are doing well. As we get older, we tend to not care about what others think. I spent years worrying and wondering what others thought about me and what I did. I'm 63 now and couldn't care less lol. It's freedom. One thing I have noticed, is everyone has their issues and choices, which may or may not be right for others. When my husband was alive and we were raising our 2 children, we saved like crazy and spent wisely, and still gave our children everything, went on reasonable vacations etc. We bought a small home,and made it our own . Others were always on us about how we should spend more on extravagant things and a bigger home etc. Fast forward, my husband passed away, I sold our home for twice what we paid, and now I am completely debt free, and own a brand new home, 2 cars, and have a healthy savings and retirement. Wonderful video Jane. Well done !🥰💐🌱🌞🌛✝💗🏜🥰💐🌱🌞🌛✝💗🏜
Love this video! Agree with all the points you made...done most of them myself lol. Budgeting to zero has been the best thing I've done for my financial self ☺️
Well,Always very thankfull that you let us think,en rethink the things That we do.
Always Look the Video twice.For the Things That I thought I perhaps missed.
Thank you,and untill next time👍👍
Thanks Marianne
The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today. Thx for your transparency. I've made all but one of those mistakes and they take work to dig out of. Im on that journey now. Thx for the info and willingness to share
You hit the nail on the head I'm constantly beating up myself for not saving as much as I should have, traveling a lot and buying a lot of things that I now realize we didn't need! We really did enjoy ourselves but I'm still beating myself up and treating it as a failure!
I purchased a basic house no frills for 221k with my son in Austin in 2018.
What a great chat!
Thank you
I know I've touched on this before, but snobbery is a huge issue where we live (wealthy part of SEast). We live on one fairly low government wage and enjoy our simple life. But, I am finding myself increasingly having to isolate myself from life around me as my values are so different ; I could not cope with the frequent comments I was subjected to or my failure to "join in" and "keep up". This has not been good for my well-being, mental health taken a real hit. I look forward to the day when my son finishes at school - GCSEs next year and A levels take it to 3 years - so we can move away. Luckily, my OH and son are in complete agreement with this. I know this sounds rather negative, but you encourage us to share and this is me responding and being open and honest.
It’s infuriating. At work, in life, on social media, those passive aggressive comments are demeaning and I’ve been there too. It’s awful. I love my very quiet life where I rarely see or speak to another human. Keeping our heads down is a matter of survival.
@@FrugalQueeninFrance Thank you x
In what situations do these comments occur?
So very enjoyable, Jane you have wonderful humor. Thank you for all of your knowledge.
Thanks very much for watching
I just realized about the Diderot effect you mentioned just last year. I am now very aware of it. What i see in Florida is the massive amount spent on entertainment and coffee!
I know someone with a $1000/month Starbuck’s routine! 😲
Congratulations hard work pays off thank you for your great tips and company
Jane, thank you for your kind words at the end. I am having a hard time forgiving myself for my stupid decisions over the past 5 years. I am living with the consequences and I feel so sad and, if I'm brutally honest, scared.
You can do it, I've been there keep watching channels like this and how to get out of debt, Our Simple Life, The humble Penny, Lara Joanna Jarvis... there's loads. Sell things that you don't use that you spent on and start over. The next 5 yrs can be better!
@@loveconnection1118 thank you. I have never had credit cards, I have no debt, already sold what isn't essential and I have 2 jobs. It's not the how to... that is my issue. It's precisely because I know better that the emotional part is hard. "The next 5 years can be better" This quote you have given me is a gift, thank you.
Lifestyle creep and particularly 'I work hard so I deserve it" are the biggest money thieves of all time. Fortunately I have always been a regular saver though 🙂
It’s a money waster isn’t it
Savings. This is what I did until I found your videos recently. I was always going to save whatever was left at the end of the month, and never was anything left.
Thanks Martha, I hope you’re able to change that.
Nailed it Jane!! I have little sayings that I scribble on post it notes and stick up, one a day, to either make me laugh, or remind me why we did what you've done. Today's is "When you truly don't care what anyone else thinks of you, you have reached a dangerously awesome level of freedom".
Yesterday's was "Some people are so poor, all they have is money".
Loving all the videos of your journey, think I need to go right back to the very first one and watch them in sequence. What was the first one you did?
Those are brilliant quotes
I’ve gotten sucked into what I call instant shopping on Amazon because it delivers next day. But the absolutely most stupid has been home shopping on QVC and their evil FLEX PAYS. By making easy monthly payments I must have spent well over $50,000 US. So instead of owning a home or driving a car, I am now paying them for junk I no longer own. It’s an addiction I equate to gambling or alcohol.
That’s been a tough journey for you
That's a pretty accurate description. It is sort of like an addiction; they come in many forms.
I really need to change my profile picture. My hair is very short, and very grey. Another great vlog Jane. I love my new frugal, debt free life! If only I could get my daughter and grandchildren on board!
I hope so too
I have a spreadsheet per pay period with expenses. My pay check before I receive has an automatic to savings & 401k this U.S.
I worry that people aren't taught about saving. I wasn't. Not talking to young uns about money is a big mistake.
I certainly wasn’t. We’re all told to have and to buy so much, to eat nicer food, to live a better life and if we do that, there’s no money to save.
For me this has to be one of your best Wednesday mid week chats, so much common sense, straight no nonsense talking. I loved it. Well done.
Greetings... I love the confidence in which you speak.Speaks volumes of the passion you have to educate through experience.
My biggest mistakes are succumbing to the snobbery and being too hard on myself.It really affected my mental health.I am doing much better , your channel helps greatly.
Blessings from S.A
I really enjoyed this, thank you. Your snobbery wisdom was particularly soothing.
Thanks Donna
You have made so many great videos, but this is certainly your best! In addition to your spot-on list of major money mistakes everyone makes at some point in their lives, I particularly love your reminder for people to have compassion for themselves. There is no sense in beating ourselves up over past errors and what is essential is to learn and improve over time! I have certainly made my share of some of these mistakes (and there remain areas of improvement), but I'm not losing any sleep over that! Fortunately, we've managed to avoid lifestyle creep, snobbery by living in rural SW France, where there is significantly less of that kind of social pressure. In any case, let the opinions of others be damned! They really don't get a say in how you choose to live your life!
Keep up the amazing work! Your videos are a delight and inspiring for this admittedly not particularly frugal fan of yours! (It's a good thing that my husband sets a good example for me, given his very humble origins in a tough région parisienne neighbourhood. 😅)
Thanks Adrienne.
Thank you for this, Jane. I can identify with so much of what you speak about. It is a relief to be free of the staffroom pressures. I am similar vintage and have succumbed to the pressure too. My life now is much less stressful if and I did not lose my real friends. No?thing like a simpler, afford.able life.
great content as usual. Since the Joneses dont 'rice'' me i dont have to please them. I'm happy with what i have and what i do. I used to be very upset with my grandmother and her 'sayings''. Now i understand where she was coming from.
Great video. As for Jonesing, you know what they say, if the grass looks greener over the fence, either it's fake or their water bill is higher :D We bought a small house and stayed in it, best financial decision ever.
Thank you for the positive message at the end and for this great topic! 🌸
You’re welcome
Great advise. People are very judgmental, and I am glad that you stopped paying attention to them. After all, they do not pay your taxes or bills.
Getting out of debt and living a frugal life style is the best way to live your life.
Hi. Yea it's amazing how our ego can take over. Lol. It's happened to me many times. Once I began truly budgeting my thoughts were on my money not "stuff". Good vid.
Thanks Barbara
I'm so happy my mother told me when I was a teen ager that I should never look at what others have, she said it may just be that they owe more money than you do. Kinda related to your video.
This video was so well thought out and really stuck home, as I and so many others have made these same mistakes. My money mistakes haunt my thoughts at times, but I must remind myself that the past is gone and I can only control the present. My younger neighbors are always buying new cars, boats and campers and I wonder if these are purchases they really can afford or are they getting in over their heads with debt. All I know is that being debt free is a wonderful feeling of security and peace.
Another excellent video! Thank you!
I think that mistakes people are making will come home to roost. We've made mistakes and had to face the consequences, learned and moved on. We'll make mistakes again I'm sure. It's human nature :) I think society as a whole in western countries has had a period of great luxury and we'll all be forced to live simpler in the future. It will be easier for those who've already adopted a simple, frugal life.
Spending on home decor has gotten crazy. I know of a couple who bought an expensive house (aren't they all these days!) and proceeded to tear out
a perfectly good and beautiful 5 year old kitchen. Out went the oak cupboards, the granite countertops, etc. simply because they wanted it to be
"their own" design. I know of someone else who over bought a large, expensive older home. It needs repairs which now they can't afford to make.
I think that the younger generation want everything now. Rather than wait and save. Plus I think credit is to easy to obtain.
This video really did "speak" to me!! I have a very low income and have made a budget.Everything is just on paper, that's how I like it! My massive money mistake is I don't seem to be able to find a system of effectively tracking my budget! When I go over on a category I just let things slid out of control for that month 🙄😒 I'm so ready to change!!! With the energy crisis here in the UK 🇬🇧 the time for me is NOW!!! Any tips would be much appreciated 👍
I certainly can make a video on tracking our budgets daily and weekly.
@@FrugalQueeninFrance Thanks,that would be great 👍 👌 😀
Hi Jane & Mike. Another great video thank you. In the past I too have made some of these mistakes and have learned from them. Now on a smoother journey. x
Fab video Jane & Mike…. 👍🏴
Fantastic points!
Thanks for watching
Wow. Never heard it so clearly summed up before. Most excellent.
Thanks for listening
Hey, I drive a BMW! Of course it was six years old when I bought it and now its 12. Great car.
I’d rather be looked down at for being frugal than be praised for being broke/struggling. I’ve learned to not assume based on looks.
Well said
I can really relate to this video, thanks
Hi miss Jane. Thank you so much for you vlogs. I do enjoy it and am learning quite a bit. I do enjoy it when you do the budget break downs. It's helped me a great deal. From Audrey Cape Town South Africa
Thank you
❣️ so many people need to hear this.
This is bang on, although it saddened me that people have been so cruel to you. Your smile lights up our screen! How much more healthy to be comfortable in your own skin and content with what is, than locked in a perpetual cycle of thinking it’s stuff which will make you happy. We’ve all been on that path though and how liberating to get off 🙏
I appreciate you!
Thank you
Your videos are so nicely done..... enough consistency with introductions and interludes to create viewer comfort in knowing what to expect, yet always new and interesting content mixed in. Well done you two!
Great video!
Thank you
I'm SO happy to have found your video site. I'm 64 now and my late husband always said "If you can't pay cash then you can't afford it!" A lot of our friends always over-extended themselves to ' keep up with the Jones' and got into financial trouble.
Very wise
My car is 13 years old will keep it until it dies. Then a used one
I love the opening of your videos with the beautiful, peaceful scenery and music.
Thanks very much
I don't know what to think about the spending, except why put yourself through all the agony for stuff.
Thanks for sharing---good points
Great video Jane, Thank you
Thanks so much to you both for sharing your tips. I don't often comment on youtube videos but have a couple of times on yours. I just had to. They're so good. I just keep coming back to the thought... Why don't they teach budgeting and tips as part of maths at school? It wouldn't take long and would emphasise the importance of maths.
I wish I'd set a budget years ago. I thought I was really good with money but it would have really helped. I saved what was left as you mentioned, thinking this was good enough. Exactly as you made the point of. Anyway, I'll stop now as I'm sure you're busy. I just think at the moment with what's going on in the world, people need this help.
For example a poor lady who I know of who can't pay her electricity and gas now, as she spent the UK government energy payments on a hot tub. That she's only used once. It's scary how people don't have the skills. Some is due to lack of capability to budget and understand money management.
Can I buy you both a coffee? You've helped me so much.
I have much less money worries than a had. Thank you so much.
You can’t help people who are that irresponsible. If you want to help the channel, let the adverts roll as we get our income that way. Thanks so much.
I really enjoyed your video, thank you. I think all those mistakes easily happen because one simply does that what youre supposedly supposed to do... I am so happy for you both that you found your own path. I found mine too, it has been a bit bumpy at the start, with some steep learning curves but I figured out where I want to go and have a steady pase, my eyes focused on the path and enjoying my journey. I hope more people will find theirs soon, might take some hard work to get there but it is so worth it!
Ok this might be my favorite video so far!!!
Thanks for watching
There are no mistakes only lessons and lessons will repeat themselves until we learn them. The Buddha
Giving in to pressure from our kids is so hard. Children have very unrealistic expectations.
Yes they do
Well, I for one admire you. Plus, I think your hair looks great! I am currently working as hard as I can to save as much money as I can. I watch lots of videos like yours, but more for inspiration yhan tips, because I was raised by frugal parents and we have done just about everything. Keep the videos coming!
A Great Deal of Common Sense as usual.
We never had savings and I couldn't understand why.
People I worked with who were on the same wages and the same number of children could afford to go on an annual holiday and we couldn't.
My wife refused to organise a budget.
I told her that I was going to have ¹0% deducted straight from my pay ( I was the worker who brought in a wage, my wife worked at keeping the house ) and she had a crying fit.
We started to get a buffer immediately.
Thanks for sharing
Done all.
We all have Sue
@@FrugalQueeninFrance 💖💖💖