I believe this is partially true. It's because of a lack of traditional values and stability amongst The working class so there's no stability for anyone to build on anymore and everything is falling into disarray
It’s so strange that Vtubers have become the defenders of men and the only female group that’s seems to genuinely want to help us and make us happy. I feel like Gimli at the end of return of the king: “Never thought I’d die fighting side by side with a cute anime girl.” “What about side by side with a friend?” “Aye, I could meme that.”
I don't think it's that strange. I won't say it's not genuine, because I don't know. But vtuber's main audience is men, typically on the younger side. If they react to videos on the topic and talk about it, they can get more viewers, and more viewers means more money.
To me, that’s one of the big reasons men want to marry vtubers. Yea, that’s more of a joke in the community, and vtubers don’t take it seriously either, but men I think would rather have a based woman like Saruei, who defends them, and cares about their mental health, than a woman that will beat them down, to raise themselves up. It’s not because they’re a cute/sexy anime girl, it because they have more compassion for men, and don’t hate them for breathing.
I think there’s definitely an element of them knowing their audience and how to appeal to them- but It could also be related to Vtubing itself. I think a lot of these Vtuber girls are kind of, outcasts? Or atleast they are a little more different.
Of course introverted women that may not be wholly confident in their appearances and who spend a lot of time in gaming and nerd culture spaces surrounded by men are going to be more ammenable to the idea that men are people than the average woman. It's the exact same circumstances that gave rise to the Honey Badger Brigade a decade ago.
To quote billy joel’s piano man “yes they’re sharing a drink they call loneliness, but its better than drinking alone” Billy joel was on to something man
If you think this one was bad, you should see the follow-up where she deals with the backlash this video generated. Or, avoid it and save yourself the psychological damage
@MaeDawnYT, you should watch it. While very disheartening, it does a perfect job of showing exactly why so many men feel the way they do and never talk about these problems.
No one talks about it except in the abstract because no one is allowed to. 2 days ago I witnessed it on reddit. On r/lonely, with the tagline "we are here for you", a man living alone posted that he was going to be awake in pain all night from an aggravated injury, and was wondering if anyone else was up to chat so he wouldnt be alone. A mod removed his post twice, ensuring it wouldnt be seen by anyone who would actually reach out to him, and told him to go to a dating site. Guy wasnt looking for a relationship, just some company while suffering. Some of us called this unfair and we were muted and banned. Most of the mods on that reddit? Women. I watched a man in pain, asking simply for another human being to show him he was worth some time, silenced hidden and run off, adding isolation and shunning onto his physical pain. Then all mention of this event was removed as well, it never happened, and anyone questioning the mods on it were banned. If I hadnt been watching that page, I never would have known. This is what happens to men who reach out in supposed safe spaces. Shoe clearly spelled out exactly where that road leads, its why banishment has been weaponized since the invention of the tribe. Well, jokes on that mod, I reached out and sat up with the guy. He wasnt in physical danger, but the next one they run off like that may well be.
You're a real one man, it sucks completely if it's all true and I hope you guys had a cool night together. Maybe we should all just stick together through this
I wish my former friend who suddenly hated me when he found out I like Trump reminded me I was enough and didn't hate me I spite deleted 7 years of esports videos I made, some of which he was in I wish former bro kept me out of depression than put me in it. We were friends for 4 of those 7 years
Standard therapy doesn't work for most men, because men don't want to talk about problems, we want to solve our problems. Talking about problems usually causes additional stress for us guys. We need SOLUTIONS, not to talk about the problem.
Most of the guys I know, me included, don't really understand our feelings sometimes and therapy is great for that. Buuut, make sure to find one that knows therapy for guys isn't the same as it is for girls.
@@3barze Didn't work for me, didn't work for all the guys that I know that have tried it. "Not understanding your feelings" is not even one of the problems men tend to report.
Yeah I get that. Ideally, you should use therapy as a sort of training wheels to connect with your inner emotional world and how to engage with it in a healthy way. However most of men's problems nowadays are not just emotional, they are material, and as such require material solutions. There's little point in realizing that anger should not be your default emotional response when you have objectively hit a dead end in life, or your day to day leaves you so exhausted you are essentially living in autopilot. Like, therapy is great at addressing the top levels of the pyramid of human needs, but that's one shitty consolation prize when the very foundation is crumbling away 🙃
a lot of women i think just don't understand that the 2 sexes in western countries basically experience different realities when growing up. Like for women, having friends, social circle, and dating are basically a given, they're frighteningly simple, esp if you take care of yourself. Yet for dudes, those same basic social things can end up being impossibly hard because dudes have to put in all the effort... on everything, so if you do nothing, nobody will care about you. That's why i think many women are shocked by the whole "no friends" thing.
Yes it's true as a 25 year old man I can tell you I have a 7 friends and I work friend. All of my friends from high school moved away. I don't talk to them any more and the friends I have now are from a discord group that I'm a part of.
Lol, I failed the first by a country mile (thanks Turdeau), I failed the second by 1.5 inches, and I failed the third by 5 out of the theoretical 6 I'd need XD
Oh my goodness!! Thank you all for your comments and stories! This topic was rough to watch but obviously not as rough as a lot of you guys have had it. I'll do my best to read them all once I'm done my current event.
@pekkajarvinen69 That's been my experience too. It and other things have led to apathy. I don't begrudge anyone leaving; that's just life at this point. But I do expect it.
Male loneliness has always been laughed off. It's always been insults or jokes. Or, in the rare case, how it affects women (yes). Now that WOMEN are feeling that loneliness epidemic, suddenly it's important and why aren't men doing anything about it.
"Men need to open up more" is the most bs take. Saying its because of "societal norms" men dont open up is even more bs. Real reason is shit like a guy telling his gf that his dad left when he was young, only for his gf to say shit like "this is why your father left you" during an argument later. Or their gfs/wives suddenly getting more distant/dry after them opening up and eventually breaking up/divorcing for random reasons when it clearly started falling appart after the guy opening up. And then people dismiss all of this by saying "oh she was just not the right one" or "she was just one bad apple there is plenty more" or some other shit like this, as if its not a too large percentage of people being this way.
There are many women who legitimately can't handle the sheer amount of emotional baggage that guys have. When they say "I wish you'd open up more" they believe that they can handle it when in reality they don't know what they're in for. There are good women out there who can handle this, but there are far too many who can't and that's where you get those types using your vulnerabilities against you in an arguement.
I learned a way around that sort of haha, what you do is you tell the girl a fake trauma thing that happened so it seems like you're opening up and then wait to see if she uses it against you so that you can tell her that you were just lying to her about that and waiting to see how and what she did, and that you were going to tell her that it was not real and why call Energy never use it against you they should understand why you did that, and then you can open up to them for real
Male loneliness is definitely a thing. For women, making friends is a lot easier. You have males and females to pick from. All you have to do is walk up to someone, start a conversation and you're on your way. For men, we usually only make friends through organizations we're a part of, or childhood friends. Approaching a woman to introduce yourself is terrifying for most men now, because it's like playing Russian roulette. One wrong statement or one wrong choice of person to approach, one accusation and your life is over. A lot of us have just given up, because while being lonely sucks, the risks of putting yourself out there to try to meet anyone are just too high. A lot of this came about from the metoo climate, and the "believe all women" movement. It just went too far. So yeah, we're isolated and struggling, but nobody actually cares. Nobody advocates for us but ourselves, which is why so many of us are so independent and individualistic. Many men of the current generation are ONLY caring about themselves because they feel like it's the only way to make sure their needs are met. Being kind to others often just gets you used and stepped on by others, so there's no benefit to us caring about others. Not saying that's a good way to look at things, but that's the general sentiment out there among men right now.
You need to stop letting morons tell you that false rape allegations are as common as they are. Just don’t be a creep and women won’t mind talking to you. And don’t go into a friendship with a woman with the intent of dating her unless you make that clear to someone. For both men and women it hurts to have someone hide their intentions and then look at you like you’re the problem for not reciprocating and just leaving. I know there’s a stigma with men talking to women, but that’s a consequence of other men, not women. A woman will assess a situation with a man because of the literal risk to them.
@@CalixionArtz Except there are women that are legit nutty upstairs and will accuse a guy just because. Even some random dude she doesn't even know. It ain't common, that's for sure. But they do exist and can ruin a man's life in an instant.
Not a girl but I'm going to correct some things. No it is not easier to make friends, my sister for example struggles with loneliness and even when she talks to people it doesn't work, women to other women are very rude. No one really ever does accusations, it's only done with more mean accusers. Also the quote of yours of "there's no use caring about others"..... I get the idea, but when you wonder why it never got better. Realize it's because you never helped anyone but yourself. Why should they care for you when you only care about yourself
I have one or two people I truly consider friends. And even they are drifting away slowly, as they find their stride in life. Meanwhile I'm struggling to find what I both CAN and WANT to do in life. I'm a perpetual wanderer, I can't find a place to spread my roots. I care too much, but work and life forces me to mind my own business and stay isolated.
3 friends vs no friends. Both are correct. You make three friends, one dies in a work related accident, one is driven to self deletion( usually because of something relating to women), and one copies the third because he couldn't deal with loosing the first two. Half joking.
3 friends, all met in kindergarten One badmouthed my girlfriend to gain clout with other women when we were 20, showing he'd been one of her old bullies back when I was in different middle school from them (bullying is a hard dealbreaker for me, my gf being the target was just the cherry on top) One just faded out once we went to different high schools, I'm pretty sure he's still alive though One explicitly made sure that I wasn't invited to any group gatherings ever again during high school, I'm still not sure why. Yeah so... Yeah. Haven't had a single friend to hang out with ever since.
03:49 the hikimori isn't male loneliness as a source but as a result. Japan their hiring practice combined with the lost decade was such a clusterfuck they still can't fix it to this day. Abe tried but man, Nippon is so stubborn at times
Here is the issue, women under the feminism banner have all collectively decided that the men they once loved and cherished are no longer decent or valuable because the laws and regulations, the "me too" movement as well, have shifted the power dynamic into their hands and made us men that prime target of "slip up ONCE and you're done for" all it takes is one weird joke with a bad punch line at the wrong moment, a benign comment taken out of context and suddenly the society we built and fight to maintain will throw us into the muck and grime and it just isn't worth it anymore. I'll give a real life scenario of this, in Toronto Canada a male rights speaker had shown up to talk about male loneliness and unaliving and what happened? Women all over the campus heard about it and banded together to bar people from gaining entry because they didn't like the speaker
Gunna bring up a point that nobody seems to be able to gather. Do not bring up other people's problems when trying to understand someone's problems. You can use parallels, but not "them to" or "us too", or "what about [x]". While trying to be neutral by saying, "well everyone has it rough" sounds nice in your head, it DOES NOT SOUND GOOD to those you say it to. It's called whatabout'ism and is used to kill any relevance to the topic.
If I've been in a similar situation, I can't help but laugh because it's funny seeing someone else vent the frustration that I've experienced. From there I'm there with them on it and help them go on from there.
@otterfire4712 That's a parallel, not a whatabout'ism. "I've experienced something similar, let's work it out" isn't trying to derail, deride, or dismantle the point/frustration.
5:25 This guy is Ted Kaczynski, he's a fairly smart guy that had his mind messed with by the FBI doing the MKUltra experiments, he exiled himself from society afterwards, and decided to take revenge by sending out bombs to several locations with the explicit goal of halting the progress of technology. He became known as the Unabomber, and he had his manifesto published in the newspaper explaining why he did this, and some of it had good points, to the point of predicting the future (our present environment). He died very recently, which is why Shoe0nHead said "RIP to the king" after she referenced how modern technology is causing problems.
Referencing in particular an infamous quote from his manifesto, "The industrial revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race."
I had about 3 friends until the end of my college days then we grew apart because they started families or other obligations. So it was true for me, I interact with coworkers and a few guys I hang out with on my off days but I don't think I can call them friends.
@7:27 Telling men that "They're enough" does nothing, it's a very temporary happiness (or more accurately lack of extreme misery) that men can feel but it will never solve the problem and that only makes men even more depressed and pushes them to suicide. Many studies have have explored positive affirmation in both men and women as a means of addressing depression and it never works for men.
I've read some of the comments, and honestly I am so sorry. I know I'm not good at talking about these things, and I know that I can't help in a big way that's needed. I hope its ok I did this react. Please take care of yourselves (I have so many things to say but I know they won't fix this huge issue).
I remember when i found a video about a guy just being a "Lovely father" on tiktok saying things like "My teammate" or "I'm proud of you". I watched that 30s video for like 40 minutes, crying in silence. Noone never said to me that is proud of me without being because i bought something or interest in getting something from me. I include my own mother there.
Yes men do create those few friendships, and most others are acquaintances/coworker style. But what happens when those close friendships start disappearing? When a friend moves away? When a friend starts a family and devotes all their time and attention to their family? That's what begins the male loneliness. 8:20 The problem is, seeking validation in yourself doesn't solve your loneliness. It makes you feel better about yourself, but your still without others. For men, we are only valued if we provide something. That's what Tate is talking about, men have to work on ourselves and become something to get out of this draught of depression and loneliness because the world isn't going to do for us what they did for women.
Physical beauty is skin deep and we all get wrinkly in the end. All I'd want is for my SO to be reasonably healthy, because the alternative is being generally miserable. That, and my second crush died of cancer and that f'cked me up a bit.
@@johnj.spurgin7037 That is sad, I hope you're doing fine and yes I'd also want my partner to be reasonably healthy because no one can bear the burden of seeing a loved one die.
I'm a guy in my 30's. I just recently went through a break up. And I did not feel i could really open up to anyone. Outside of the blatantly obvious feelings. It is soul crushing. And I can't tell anyone close to me. Because we weren't raised on how to or that we should be emotional.
I am a 20 year old man, and I had my first job as a dishwasher. And I loved it sure my feet hurt due to standing for 8 hours but I stilled loved it because I felt like I was useful. But when I was let go for being slow, I felt like shit
The worst part is I’m a guy almost in high school and have a close nit friend group but four of the nine are nice to me a five ft teenager who’s under weight so my friend group is quickly falling apart and turning to shit as one to two of my actual friends are not going to the same high school as me so hearing that it was addressed makes me much happier
Even then; I wouldn't trust it simply because I know just how shaky of a """""""""science""""""""" psychology really is. Science requires data to reach conclusions, and anyone who understands the basics of information gathering and analysis knows that psychology is exclusively limited to some of the most unreliable methods of data collection to get the data on which the basis of their conclusion of a healthy or unhealthy mind and how they should and shouldn't work.
Also gotta get rid of the daytime talk TV pseuds *and* the pharmaceutical lobbyists. Supposedly, shit's less fucked in countries that don't follow the APA.
I been alone for a while and my friends drifted away mostly because we have work. It is hard to find something that can make you happy when you got people tearing you down. It's always nice to see people that care about this topic.
Yeah, I feel this. I want to become more vulnerable with my friends, but the problem is I don't know how to. I don't understand emotions, so if I don't understand emotions, how am I supposed to express them.
I have 1 friend and I barely see them anymore. I stopped trying to date anymore, because apparently all that I am good for is money. I am a 4/10, strangers don't talk to me, I been laughed at for trying to hit on a girl. I go to work, I come home and only leave to go to the store or if it's important. I stay in my room for days without talking to people sometimes. I can't let anyone in cause if I do they will either use or hurt me.
This is why I bottle everything up and don’t talk to anyone about my feelings, what I think or what I’m struggling with. When you do talk about stuff like that as a man a lot of people will see you as a crybaby or something of that nature and try to put you down even more, because a majority of people (at least from my experience) will not care about anything that someone is going through, I’m constantly ready to give up everyday.
The problem with bottling shit up - which I did too - is the bottle eventually gets full. Then what. It's ugly and harmful. I think more commonly; self-harmful (mental, physical, both). It's completely unhelpful if you can't find anywhere to release the pressure at all though. Try to find some release. Physical activity is a great outlet - while not a whole solution it does help. What's the stupidest thing in this is that so many are going through crap; but alone. This age of digital connections is so stupid because you could live in an apartment complex with dozens of lonely, unhappy people all just feet from each other. Humanity is f'd.
9:50 The moment she said Jordan Peterson she was was bullshiting because when the male suicide rate peaked he aided the national suicide hotline and helped stop multiple men from making an attempt on their own life
(Nearly) every guy just wants to be left alone with a happy family of their own with a wife who loves them. But with society today most of us have been bashed so far down that we no longer look for the family or a wife who loves them. So all we have left is to be left alone and we begin to isolate farther and farther, the mental health issue we face today is “Probably” harder than it has ever been in human history.
0:38 my reason for not having friends and trying to keep a distance from people is that it hurts when you lose friendships you genuinely cared about. A lot of it also has to do with my distrust in people due to social experiences.
Same, I learned from a very young age That there is nothing out there for me in this world and the frequency of the desire to not wanting to exist anymore rises I´m just waiting for my parents to go so that i don't make the last people i have sad
Friends just die. On one hand I THIRST for bros I can share my problems with and vice versa, but I don't want to risk finding them and then losing them. Apathy is armor, but it's also a curse.
Another big reason people like Andrew Tate are so popular is because of the massive increase in single parent households. something like 23% of children in the US are raised by a single parent statistically most likely being the mother. this especially impacts low income communities and minority communities for example between 50%-80% of African American children in the US are raised by a single parent. Most of these children lack a good male role model growing up.
On the friend thing it is both. I have 2 friends from when I was young and haven't seen them in years. I in fact have only seen one of them in the last 5 years once. And that was to go to his wedding that they invited me to then asked me to be one of the photographers. ( They are a family friend.) The other one I heard was battling a rare disease and was embarrassed. I have no idea why. I would have been happy to have been there for him if he would have let me. So yes I only have 2 friends and none.
8:45 THANK YOU. I have had a stance in my public life that i have gotten consistent push back on which was that everyone is mentally ill, just to different degrees. 9:10 MRA Mens rights activist. The right views them as the male version of feminism (bringing attention to mens problems) and the left calls them oppressors and grifters. Unless you meant you forgot which was left and which was right.... 12:57 I think something to keep in mind is Silent Majority Theory dictates that most people are not vocal most of the time. The ones you see are the ones moved to create something. Mentally ill people on twitter who post non stop are quite literally not normal
See, this is the thing. Me speaking about my issues as a man does NOT somehow mean im downplaying or ignoring the issues women face. Its not a fucking contest, right? Men dont have it better off than women, we just have different issues. We can advocate for BOTH of those things, cant we? Just because im speaking for ME doesnt mean im against YOU.
Making friends doesn’t always require vulnerability…mostly. Different kinds of vulnerability work as well. Like not paying attention when walking through a school parking lot and getting bowled over by an suv, thankfully not getting hurt, then getting offered a ride home by the classmate that just ran you down, and when getting close to the other kids house, finding out we lived literally down the street from each other. And that is how I made two of my closest friends in high school, and the passenger in the suv is basically as close as a brother now. 22 years of friendship and family, all because I got plowed over by a classmate not paying attention to pedestrian traffic and me not paying attention to vehicular traffic.
"Why is this so hard?" That's a good question honestly. I think that society as a whole has gotten to the point where it's no longer good at positive affirmation. If you do good, that's expected, so no praise. If you mess up a little, you get ragged on endlessly. If you mess up a lot, straight to jail. Like, there's only negative reinforcement going on now, and it's really not healthy for most people's psychological health.
Many. But they're from family which to me is something I should ignore. If it's some friend I've known that hands me a compliment a genuine compliment.. It would be nice@@Davey647Returns
The woman I'm currently dating gave me one when we first got together and I told her that was the seventh compliment on my appearance I've ever gotten in my life.
Don't worry about us, we thrive while alone. What you should worry about is you, how you will learn to build and maintain the infrastructure that society is built on. We made it for you, now you don't want us so we are walking away, going our own way. I will live happily on my sailboat fishing around the world for the rest of my life. I don't need you, you need me and you will learn that the hard way because what we built is crumbling without us maintaining it. Good luck.
It depends on your the state of mind. It gets extremely hard to change. ( you get trapped in the cycle and can't get out) You get told by everyone that you need to be a certain way, you must never show your weakness and keep everything bottle up. To the point where it extremely hard to even try to open up or let anyone know you have a problem. It goes to a point where most therapy doesn't help.
Yeah, I've just completely given up on finding a relationship, like, I know I'm too ugly to meet anyone in person and I'm not gonna use dating apps because I'll just get screamed at for being a white male Christian
that's if you even get a match and they interact with you. i binged 3 dating apps at once for a month and got a grand total of 3 matches which 2 of those unmatched me the same day without saying anything and the third responded to me once and then never interacted with me again. completed my account with bio, likes, music, ect.. and i'd say i'm not ugly but i'm no tom cruise either and yet i had no luck whatsoever so i ended up deleting them since i started feeling more and more depressed every time i opened those damn apps
“There’s no way to know the rules or the goal, yet there are 7 billion people making whatever moves they want. If you lose too much, or win too much, there are penalties. You can’t pass your turn, and if you talk too much, you’ll be ostracized. There are no parameters and no way to even know the genre. This world is just a crappy game." - Sora, No Game No Life
I have some very good friends, group of 3, i meet them once a year or so. I dont date at all due to Some rather unpleasant women ive met troughout my life, Isolation is peaceful. Dont think ive had any physical contact with anyone for atleast half a year, not Even a handshake. And yeah, Its depressing, but its better than the alternative.
I feel that our society doesn't allow men the time to think about themselves, we have to provide, we have to be the strong one through everything. There is no time to worry about feelings, Feelings doesn't make money It's not fair
That might be your situation, but generally speaking, it is the opposite. We have a bunch of teenagers with too much alone time, who reflect on their feelings and forget reality, leading to reclusion and depression.
I _want_ to provide. But our society is so focused on overall economic output that it's no longer possible for me to do so. All the familial support networks that used to help people meet their life partners and get through tough times have been destroyed. Same with local communities. It used to be so much easier for men to fulfil their life goals. We have luxuries the people of the past couldn't imagine, but the fundamentals (like owning a house) are sailing over the horizon of feasibility. That's what's depressing.
@@ReddwarfIVA lot of people like to deride those who thinks some things may have been better in the past by calling out the worst possible things and pretending the person is advocating for those specifically: "Oh, you want to go back to when medicine sucked and [X] didn't have rights, do you?" No, but it would be nice to once again live in a world where you could support a family reasonably on a single income. Where you could pay for college while you were in school instead of being 5-6 figures in debt. Where people formed meaningful communities IRL to help ensure their neighbor's needs are being met. Hell, one where people remembered how to interact in person and meet people.
@@Zielschmer They're not "reflecting on their feelings and forgetting reality"; they're reflecting on their feelings as they pertain to reality. This idea that men aren't remembering reality is a disgusting dismissal of men's issues.
Video's like this help guys like me feel seen, I've got like one close friend and we can't hang out much because of work stuff. I've got no one, I barely even interact online much. But I still try to talk to people in public to make friends. everyone is just too busy.
As a 35 year old guy who's never been in a relationship or even been kissed. It gets tiring being turned down and laughed at by women, or be told you're too scary because you're too tall. Swiping and trying to get matches or paying for dating sites and getting nothing. All while seeing happy couples together. Honestly, if I didn't have to, I probably wouldn't leave my room either. So I totally get the hikikomori thing.
I don't have the height or nerd, but I do have the income. 15 years ago I divorced. Ever since; my dating scene has been like yours and not even given a reason why. Maybe looks. Maybe divorce tag. Maybe something else, I don't know. Many of us live like hikikomori without even wanting to. It's just the life that we're left with.
I think we should take care of each other regardless of their gender, these people are crazy. How are we supposed live if we didn't care about men and women, we need each other more than anything. This gender war is crazy.
I went through a break up with my ex (that I started) and the main complaint was i never express my emotion. She asked me to show more during our "on break" and i did. After 2 days of doing so got told by her and all my friends to "stfu and handle it yourself." I did stfu and i got more depressed and till this day never express myself ever again
This topic is a difficult one... The video touched on the more 'commonly known' things, like bottling up emotions, feeling isolated etc... and yeah. That's a problem. But if that was all there was to the problem, all guys would have to do is form their own tightknit groups and help each other through the vulnerabilities (We do this too). We aren't stupid, we would have solved that problem long ago if it were so simple. As with anything human, it's complex and unique for every single person. If you're curious about the topic, try reaching out to the guys you're familiar with and see what they'd be willing to disclose. Some guys are more willing to share, others would rather keep it to themselves.
thanks homie, yea i wont pretend to know these things on a deeper level (a lot of it im seeing is individual in nature) I just really hope people treat each other kinder, check in on each other and lift each other up
The left keeps coming back to saying things like "we need a leftist tim pool" and "we need a leftist Joe Rogan"... Um... They had a leftist Tim Pool and Joe Rogan before they pushed them out of the Democratic party for addressing issues that needed to be addressed; their names were Tim Pool and Joe Rogan.... 🙄
My family tells me I’m extremely selfish and this is somewhat why I’m usually on my own when things go to shit and no one is there when I truly need them even when I was quote “selfless” so I decided if no one’s ever going to genuinely help me I might as well fill that void with my enjoyments and pleasures.
Basically, Look up the definition of discipline. Meditate on that. Find a goal and stick to it. Be the person you want your children to remember you as.
Man, it sucks watching this and reflecting on my life just looking at how I barely talk to people and work 10 hour shifts in the middle of the night. Then knowing there is other guys like me hurts
The 3 friends thing are the ride or die friends these are the guys when they call saying they need something you don't ask questions you just show up and be there for them
5:25 that would be ted kaczynski. and oh boy, if you havent ever heard of him, you are in for a treat. count dankula and wendigoon did a good video covering him (hour and a half long and 3 and a half hours long respectively), but the tl;dr is he was not a very good person (an understatement, i know), but he had some very good points and was very relatable to a shocking amount of people.
Most of my friends moved away and making new friends is really hard. It's therapeutic hearing from women who are genuinely concerned about men's health.
21:14 i was arguing with some people about how its unfair to blame my generation (z) for the election because we've been told we're useless lazy and whimpy and conservative boomers and other adults. Then came the election, and both sides tried to pander to us only for our vote and nothing else. Now after the election, the liberals also hate us cause a large portion went Republican leaving those of us who listen to both sides and choosed wisely left us with little side to want us. And how did those people respond: "gen z truning out to be the worst generation" "gen z are failures" Shit, i barely got my foot in the world and now im being hated for just existing
Being a millenial I can assure you that it's always been like that and it'll always stay that way. Politics in general isn't about finding solutions, it's about finding someone to blame. Same for medias, same for people, and we'll all most likely follow the trend at some point. Sounds horrible but elections prove it, Covid proved it, and any social movement ends up destroying itself for these very same reasons.
Yeah ive always been a bit of an introverted dude, but the isolation from covid, the string of bad relationships, and my best friend of over a decade throwing me under the bus to save his own skin, i have become a hermit. I have coworkers that im friendly with but at the end of the day i go home to an empty house with no one to talk to or hang out with. I hate that i prefer it but doing anything else just makes me too nervous.
if anyone wanna consume some media about hikkikomoris, I recommend Welcome to the NHK is a great story about a man that has isolated himself due to insecurities. It was a novel written by one too.
![Women Can't Seriously Do This... The Ick List - Mae Reacts [ Vtuber Reacts ]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/MkqZOOr-2uw/mqdefault.jpg)
![Women Can't Seriously Do This... The Ick List - Mae Reacts [ Vtuber Reacts ]](/img/tr.png)
The fact that women attacked her for this, when she didn't blame women, says a lot about why men in America have given up on the women in America.
@@Morriganhailey
Try again, but use your brain this time.
I believe this is partially true. It's because of a lack of traditional values and stability amongst The working class so there's no stability for anyone to build on anymore and everything is falling into disarray
@kairu_aname idk what they said, but I'll assume they don't have one.
I’m barely 18 and I will never have another relationship
@@skeletor2994
"M should get over it, they did it to themselves"
Something along those lines, iirc.
It’s so strange that Vtubers have become the defenders of men and the only female group that’s seems to genuinely want to help us and make us happy. I feel like Gimli at the end of return of the king:
“Never thought I’d die fighting side by side with a cute anime girl.”
“What about side by side with a friend?”
“Aye, I could meme that.”
I don't think it's that strange. I won't say it's not genuine, because I don't know. But vtuber's main audience is men, typically on the younger side. If they react to videos on the topic and talk about it, they can get more viewers, and more viewers means more money.
To me, that’s one of the big reasons men want to marry vtubers. Yea, that’s more of a joke in the community, and vtubers don’t take it seriously either, but men I think would rather have a based woman like Saruei, who defends them, and cares about their mental health, than a woman that will beat them down, to raise themselves up. It’s not because they’re a cute/sexy anime girl, it because they have more compassion for men, and don’t hate them for breathing.
I think there’s definitely an element of them knowing their audience and how to appeal to them- but It could also be related to Vtubing itself. I think a lot of these Vtuber girls are kind of, outcasts? Or atleast they are a little more different.
Of course introverted women that may not be wholly confident in their appearances and who spend a lot of time in gaming and nerd culture spaces surrounded by men are going to be more ammenable to the idea that men are people than the average woman.
It's the exact same circumstances that gave rise to the Honey Badger Brigade a decade ago.
maybe they dont have mommy/daddy issues
To quote billy joel’s piano man “yes they’re sharing a drink they call loneliness, but its better than drinking alone”
Billy joel was on to something man
And i thought that I would only count as alcoholic when drink alone, bc of it i started to drink infront of mirrors
If you think this one was bad, you should see the follow-up where she deals with the backlash this video generated. Or, avoid it and save yourself the psychological damage
She must know the truth.
The whole saga is hilarious and depressing, it needs to be watched.
OH NO im so worried but considering its me me I must know!
@MaeDawnYT, you should watch it. While very disheartening, it does a perfect job of showing exactly why so many men feel the way they do and never talk about these problems.
I couldn't even watch 6 minutes of this video.
No one talks about it except in the abstract because no one is allowed to. 2 days ago I witnessed it on reddit. On r/lonely, with the tagline "we are here for you", a man living alone posted that he was going to be awake in pain all night from an aggravated injury, and was wondering if anyone else was up to chat so he wouldnt be alone. A mod removed his post twice, ensuring it wouldnt be seen by anyone who would actually reach out to him, and told him to go to a dating site. Guy wasnt looking for a relationship, just some company while suffering. Some of us called this unfair and we were muted and banned. Most of the mods on that reddit? Women.
I watched a man in pain, asking simply for another human being to show him he was worth some time, silenced hidden and run off, adding isolation and shunning onto his physical pain. Then all mention of this event was removed as well, it never happened, and anyone questioning the mods on it were banned. If I hadnt been watching that page, I never would have known. This is what happens to men who reach out in supposed safe spaces. Shoe clearly spelled out exactly where that road leads, its why banishment has been weaponized since the invention of the tribe. Well, jokes on that mod, I reached out and sat up with the guy. He wasnt in physical danger, but the next one they run off like that may well be.
That is fucking monstrous if true. My heart goes out to that man. Thanks for having a heart, dude.
You're a real one man, it sucks completely if it's all true and I hope you guys had a cool night together. Maybe we should all just stick together through this
@@primalchaos7823 Maybe? Our own supposed safe spaces are turning on us. We are all we have.
You are a good person. I hope that guy gets through his suffering...
Telling someone that they are enough usually doesn't amount to much when all of society disagrees.
Hearing it from the only person whose estimation you really care about can make all the difference in the world though.
Like a bandage on a very very deep scar, on the inside, not outside of a person.
I wish my former friend who suddenly hated me when he found out I like Trump reminded me I was enough and didn't hate me
I spite deleted 7 years of esports videos I made, some of which he was in
I wish former bro kept me out of depression than put me in it. We were friends for 4 of those 7 years
@@JesterKingZant Um... I feel like there is a ton of important missing information here.
@@lucasbroome1048 4 years worth of important information
Standard therapy doesn't work for most men, because men don't want to talk about problems, we want to solve our problems. Talking about problems usually causes additional stress for us guys. We need SOLUTIONS, not to talk about the problem.
Most of the guys I know, me included, don't really understand our feelings sometimes and therapy is great for that. Buuut, make sure to find one that knows therapy for guys isn't the same as it is for girls.
@@3barze Didn't work for me, didn't work for all the guys that I know that have tried it. "Not understanding your feelings" is not even one of the problems men tend to report.
Yeah I get that. Ideally, you should use therapy as a sort of training wheels to connect with your inner emotional world and how to engage with it in a healthy way.
However most of men's problems nowadays are not just emotional, they are material, and as such require material solutions. There's little point in realizing that anger should not be your default emotional response when you have objectively hit a dead end in life, or your day to day leaves you so exhausted you are essentially living in autopilot.
Like, therapy is great at addressing the top levels of the pyramid of human needs, but that's one shitty consolation prize when the very foundation is crumbling away 🙃
Therapy is when you talk about your problems to find a solution, if your psychologist ain't showing you a solution, you are being scammed
I likely wouldn’t be alive without my therapist.
"Is it true men have few-to-no friends now?"
Commonly. Covid isolation drove the nail in the coffin, so to speak. We all left and never came back.
...but you're a kind person, Mae. :)
Yeah dude she is. I just found her channel right now.
yeah, just one here and he's in a different country so there's that
a lot of women i think just don't understand that the 2 sexes in western countries basically experience different realities when growing up. Like for women, having friends, social circle, and dating are basically a given, they're frighteningly simple, esp if you take care of yourself. Yet for dudes, those same basic social things can end up being impossibly hard because dudes have to put in all the effort... on everything, so if you do nothing, nobody will care about you. That's why i think many women are shocked by the whole "no friends" thing.
Yes it's true as a 25 year old man I can tell you I have a 7 friends and I work friend. All of my friends from high school moved away. I don't talk to them any more and the friends I have now are from a discord group that I'm a part of.
the three 6s: 6-figure income, 6-foot tall, 6-pack abs. you'll see these held as bare requirements.
I've got one of them!
5’ 11” guys punching air rn
666 is the number of the beast
lmfao what a call-out. Well done.
Lol, I failed the first by a country mile (thanks Turdeau), I failed the second by 1.5 inches, and I failed the third by 5 out of the theoretical 6 I'd need XD
Oh my goodness!! Thank you all for your comments and stories! This topic was rough to watch but obviously not as rough as a lot of you guys have had it. I'll do my best to read them all once I'm done my current event.
Hey just found your channel! The tracking on your model is amazing and its so cute!😊
One of my best friends died of brain cancer at 36. Another overdosed. Others have moved away. So that puts me back down to 0.
I'm so sorry.
@@JayTohab Thanks. I just try to appreciate that i am still here.
I've learned during my life that everybody leaves sooner or later. Nobody stays in your life.
Im back to 1
@pekkajarvinen69 That's been my experience too. It and other things have led to apathy.
I don't begrudge anyone leaving; that's just life at this point. But I do expect it.
Male loneliness has always been laughed off. It's always been insults or jokes. Or, in the rare case, how it affects women (yes). Now that WOMEN are feeling that loneliness epidemic, suddenly it's important and why aren't men doing anything about it.
Rare?
"Men need to open up more" is the most bs take. Saying its because of "societal norms" men dont open up is even more bs.
Real reason is shit like a guy telling his gf that his dad left when he was young, only for his gf to say shit like "this is why your father left you" during an argument later. Or their gfs/wives suddenly getting more distant/dry after them opening up and eventually breaking up/divorcing for random reasons when it clearly started falling appart after the guy opening up.
And then people dismiss all of this by saying "oh she was just not the right one" or "she was just one bad apple there is plenty more" or some other shit like this, as if its not a too large percentage of people being this way.
They want men to open up just to talk down to them.
There are many women who legitimately can't handle the sheer amount of emotional baggage that guys have. When they say "I wish you'd open up more" they believe that they can handle it when in reality they don't know what they're in for. There are good women out there who can handle this, but there are far too many who can't and that's where you get those types using your vulnerabilities against you in an arguement.
I learned a way around that sort of haha, what you do is you tell the girl a fake trauma thing that happened so it seems like you're opening up and then wait to see if she uses it against you so that you can tell her that you were just lying to her about that and waiting to see how and what she did, and that you were going to tell her that it was not real and why call Energy never use it against you they should understand why you did that, and then you can open up to them for real
no
Male loneliness is definitely a thing. For women, making friends is a lot easier. You have males and females to pick from. All you have to do is walk up to someone, start a conversation and you're on your way. For men, we usually only make friends through organizations we're a part of, or childhood friends. Approaching a woman to introduce yourself is terrifying for most men now, because it's like playing Russian roulette. One wrong statement or one wrong choice of person to approach, one accusation and your life is over. A lot of us have just given up, because while being lonely sucks, the risks of putting yourself out there to try to meet anyone are just too high. A lot of this came about from the metoo climate, and the "believe all women" movement. It just went too far.
So yeah, we're isolated and struggling, but nobody actually cares. Nobody advocates for us but ourselves, which is why so many of us are so independent and individualistic. Many men of the current generation are ONLY caring about themselves because they feel like it's the only way to make sure their needs are met. Being kind to others often just gets you used and stepped on by others, so there's no benefit to us caring about others. Not saying that's a good way to look at things, but that's the general sentiment out there among men right now.
You need to stop letting morons tell you that false rape allegations are as common as they are.
Just don’t be a creep and women won’t mind talking to you. And don’t go into a friendship with a woman with the intent of dating her unless you make that clear to someone.
For both men and women it hurts to have someone hide their intentions and then look at you like you’re the problem for not reciprocating and just leaving.
I know there’s a stigma with men talking to women, but that’s a consequence of other men, not women. A woman will assess a situation with a man because of the literal risk to them.
@@CalixionArtz Except there are women that are legit nutty upstairs and will accuse a guy just because. Even some random dude she doesn't even know. It ain't common, that's for sure. But they do exist and can ruin a man's life in an instant.
Not at all. A lot woman are the same as the “men loneliness” you’re speaking of. I myself are like that too but I’m a woman.
Not a girl but I'm going to correct some things. No it is not easier to make friends, my sister for example struggles with loneliness and even when she talks to people it doesn't work, women to other women are very rude.
No one really ever does accusations, it's only done with more mean accusers.
Also the quote of yours of "there's no use caring about others"..... I get the idea, but when you wonder why it never got better. Realize it's because you never helped anyone but yourself. Why should they care for you when you only care about yourself
@vodkanyuReal, my sister hasn't made friends who are girls in 12 years. Damn I watched her talk and girls are rude to other girls.
I have one or two people I truly consider friends. And even they are drifting away slowly, as they find their stride in life. Meanwhile I'm struggling to find what I both CAN and WANT to do in life. I'm a perpetual wanderer, I can't find a place to spread my roots. I care too much, but work and life forces me to mind my own business and stay isolated.
I feel that . Same with me.
Same
Same!!! Your not alone, we be out here together
3 friends vs no friends. Both are correct.
You make three friends, one dies in a work related accident, one is driven to self deletion( usually because of something relating to women), and one copies the third because he couldn't deal with loosing the first two.
Half joking.
One of my childhood friends is dead and one is in prison for a heinous crime that I never thought him capable of. It’s crazy
3 friends, all met in kindergarten
One badmouthed my girlfriend to gain clout with other women when we were 20, showing he'd been one of her old bullies back when I was in different middle school from them (bullying is a hard dealbreaker for me, my gf being the target was just the cherry on top)
One just faded out once we went to different high schools, I'm pretty sure he's still alive though
One explicitly made sure that I wasn't invited to any group gatherings ever again during high school, I'm still not sure why.
Yeah so... Yeah. Haven't had a single friend to hang out with ever since.
The only thing wrong about this is that I there's no work related accident yet, and I was the one that nearly followed the second.
03:49 the hikimori isn't male loneliness as a source but as a result. Japan their hiring practice combined with the lost decade was such a clusterfuck they still can't fix it to this day. Abe tried but man, Nippon is so stubborn at times
Don't forget that the original video came out years ago, hating men has been more or less normalized by the average extreme feminist.
Here is the issue, women under the feminism banner have all collectively decided that the men they once loved and cherished are no longer decent or valuable because the laws and regulations, the "me too" movement as well, have shifted the power dynamic into their hands and made us men that prime target of "slip up ONCE and you're done for" all it takes is one weird joke with a bad punch line at the wrong moment, a benign comment taken out of context and suddenly the society we built and fight to maintain will throw us into the muck and grime and it just isn't worth it anymore. I'll give a real life scenario of this, in Toronto Canada a male rights speaker had shown up to talk about male loneliness and unaliving and what happened? Women all over the campus heard about it and banded together to bar people from gaining entry because they didn't like the speaker
Sometimes, I wish to be a dictator because of these ridiculous problems.
Gunna bring up a point that nobody seems to be able to gather.
Do not bring up other people's problems when trying to understand someone's problems.
You can use parallels, but not "them to" or "us too", or "what about [x]".
While trying to be neutral by saying, "well everyone has it rough" sounds nice in your head, it DOES NOT SOUND GOOD to those you say it to.
It's called whatabout'ism and is used to kill any relevance to the topic.
If I've been in a similar situation, I can't help but laugh because it's funny seeing someone else vent the frustration that I've experienced. From there I'm there with them on it and help them go on from there.
@otterfire4712
That's a parallel, not a whatabout'ism.
"I've experienced something similar, let's work it out" isn't trying to derail, deride, or dismantle the point/frustration.
5:25 This guy is Ted Kaczynski, he's a fairly smart guy that had his mind messed with by the FBI doing the MKUltra experiments, he exiled himself from society afterwards, and decided to take revenge by sending out bombs to several locations with the explicit goal of halting the progress of technology. He became known as the Unabomber, and he had his manifesto published in the newspaper explaining why he did this, and some of it had good points, to the point of predicting the future (our present environment). He died very recently, which is why Shoe0nHead said "RIP to the king" after she referenced how modern technology is causing problems.
Referencing in particular an infamous quote from his manifesto, "The industrial revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race."
No. He did it for fun and made that up later. Get your facts straight.
@@JustSomeGuywithEpicGrasses Proof?
@@Adanu191 he stated he was disappointed that his bomb didn't kill the receptionist.
@@JustSomeGuywithEpicGrasses Stop dodging the question. Proof.
Misandy is mainstream nowadays
the only reason why your romment is still there is bcs of the missing r
the youtube algorithm doesn't recognize
yes it's that F'ed up
@@m3redgt The man-hatred runs deep..
@@m3redgt god I hate this site
@@m3redgt Well spotted with the spelling mistake :)
@@m3redgtone of the keywords. I usually replace one letter with a symbol or something to avoid censor bot.
I had about 3 friends until the end of my college days then we grew apart because they started families or other obligations. So it was true for me, I interact with coworkers and a few guys I hang out with on my off days but I don't think I can call them friends.
@7:27 Telling men that "They're enough" does nothing, it's a very temporary happiness (or more accurately lack of extreme misery) that men can feel but it will never solve the problem and that only makes men even more depressed and pushes them to suicide. Many studies have have explored positive affirmation in both men and women as a means of addressing depression and it never works for men.
I've known an escort and she got paid the most by a guy to just have dinner with him. Guy are like most people, just want to spend time with someone.
I've read some of the comments, and honestly I am so sorry. I know I'm not good at talking about these things, and I know that I can't help in a big way that's needed. I hope its ok I did this react. Please take care of yourselves (I have so many things to say but I know they won't fix this huge issue).
I remember when i found a video about a guy just being a "Lovely father" on tiktok saying things like "My teammate" or "I'm proud of you". I watched that 30s video for like 40 minutes, crying in silence. Noone never said to me that is proud of me without being because i bought something or interest in getting something from me. I include my own mother there.
Yes men do create those few friendships, and most others are acquaintances/coworker style. But what happens when those close friendships start disappearing? When a friend moves away? When a friend starts a family and devotes all their time and attention to their family? That's what begins the male loneliness.
8:20 The problem is, seeking validation in yourself doesn't solve your loneliness. It makes you feel better about yourself, but your still without others. For men, we are only valued if we provide something. That's what Tate is talking about, men have to work on ourselves and become something to get out of this draught of depression and loneliness because the world isn't going to do for us what they did for women.
At this point I'll take a girl who is kind hearted and cares about my mental health even if she is ugly.. For me it would just be enough.
Physical beauty is skin deep and we all get wrinkly in the end.
All I'd want is for my SO to be reasonably healthy, because the alternative is being generally miserable.
That, and my second crush died of cancer and that f'cked me up a bit.
@@johnj.spurgin7037 That is sad, I hope you're doing fine and yes I'd also want my partner to be reasonably healthy because no one can bear the burden of seeing a loved one die.
Thanks for caring hun, its nice to see many of you Vtubers being able to empathize with us ❤️
I'm a guy in my 30's. I just recently went through a break up. And I did not feel i could really open up to anyone. Outside of the blatantly obvious feelings. It is soul crushing. And I can't tell anyone close to me. Because we weren't raised on how to or that we should be emotional.
22:18 hey, yellow pillow is the homie that doesn't quit. The one that will never leave, no matter how sweaty you are.
I am a 20 year old man, and I had my first job as a dishwasher. And I loved it sure my feet hurt due to standing for 8 hours but I stilled loved it because I felt like I was useful. But when I was let go for being slow, I felt like shit
Thank you, Mae. It's not the easiest topic to discuss, but regardless, it's appreciated. Now... headed to the shower, I must wash as directed... :D
LOLLL yes please follow those instructions! xD
The worst part is I’m a guy almost in high school and have a close nit friend group but four of the nine are nice to me a five ft teenager who’s under weight so my friend group is quickly falling apart and turning to shit as one to two of my actual friends are not going to the same high school as me so hearing that it was addressed makes me much happier
I would trust going to psychology but. Not today maybe when they get the DEI hires out.
Even then; I wouldn't trust it simply because I know just how shaky of a """""""""science""""""""" psychology really is.
Science requires data to reach conclusions, and anyone who understands the basics of information gathering and analysis knows that psychology is exclusively limited to some of the most unreliable methods of data collection to get the data on which the basis of their conclusion of a healthy or unhealthy mind and how they should and shouldn't work.
Also gotta get rid of the daytime talk TV pseuds *and* the pharmaceutical lobbyists.
Supposedly, shit's less fucked in countries that don't follow the APA.
As a teen male, i can agree that if i want to succeed, i have to only rely on my self
These Twitter people are very real, and they definitely bring it IRL.
You should really do a shoe on head binge.
I been alone for a while and my friends drifted away mostly because we have work. It is hard to find something that can make you happy when you got people tearing you down. It's always nice to see people that care about this topic.
Its sweet how emotional you get for men. Where it is easier, and more lucrative to stir the pot, kindness is always great to see.
Knowing that someone cares and isn't afraid to say it, even if it's through the veil of a digital second skin... it really helps.
Yeah, I feel this. I want to become more vulnerable with my friends, but the problem is I don't know how to. I don't understand emotions, so if I don't understand emotions, how am I supposed to express them.
Talk about them with someone who can help you understand, like a Therapist or a trusted person.
@eldritchumbra9834 okay I will try that thanks
I have 1 friend and I barely see them anymore. I stopped trying to date anymore, because apparently all that I am good for is money. I am a 4/10, strangers don't talk to me, I been laughed at for trying to hit on a girl. I go to work, I come home and only leave to go to the store or if it's important. I stay in my room for days without talking to people sometimes. I can't let anyone in cause if I do they will either use or hurt me.
1984 is a good story. Scary how much of it has been made reality. The 2+2=5 part hit hard.
This is why I bottle everything up and don’t talk to anyone about my feelings, what I think or what I’m struggling with. When you do talk about stuff like that as a man a lot of people will see you as a crybaby or something of that nature and try to put you down even more, because a majority of people (at least from my experience) will not care about anything that someone is going through, I’m constantly ready to give up everyday.
The problem with bottling shit up - which I did too - is the bottle eventually gets full. Then what. It's ugly and harmful. I think more commonly; self-harmful (mental, physical, both).
It's completely unhelpful if you can't find anywhere to release the pressure at all though. Try to find some release. Physical activity is a great outlet - while not a whole solution it does help.
What's the stupidest thing in this is that so many are going through crap; but alone. This age of digital connections is so stupid because you could live in an apartment complex with dozens of lonely, unhappy people all just feet from each other. Humanity is f'd.
1984 is a great book, it's becoming our reality more and more. I hope you enjoy it.
Read 1984... And then watch "Idiocracy". Then try not to cry.
Gaze upon the textbooks for the modern hellscape and try not to lose faith in humanity challenge: LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE
"Men don't cry"
But we have fealing too🥺
Not sure I do anymore.
Or at least not as much as I used to. Being numb hurts less, so I just do that.
9:50 The moment she said Jordan Peterson she was was bullshiting because when the male suicide rate peaked he aided the national suicide hotline and helped stop multiple men from making an attempt on their own life
Thankfully Ana has come around and is much more reasonable nowadays.
As a lonely guy, I admit to literally crying to positive affirmation asmr.
I haven't listened, and part of it is because I really worry it'll make me a wreck. I can't deal with that.
I have 2 true friends and the public hates me for it
"Did we fail men?" Yes, the answer is yes
Damn some are having 3 friends damn i can barely manage 2
22:47 - *she goes SUPER quiet LOL*
IM SO SORRY
(Nearly) every guy just wants to be left alone with a happy family of their own with a wife who loves them. But with society today most of us have been bashed so far down that we no longer look for the family or a wife who loves them. So all we have left is to be left alone and we begin to isolate farther and farther, the mental health issue we face today is “Probably” harder than it has ever been in human history.
0:38 my reason for not having friends and trying to keep a distance from people is that it hurts when you lose friendships you genuinely cared about. A lot of it also has to do with my distrust in people due to social experiences.
Same, I learned from a very young age That there is nothing out there for me in this world
and the frequency of the desire to not wanting to exist anymore rises
I´m just waiting for my parents to go so that i don't make the last people i have sad
Friends just die.
On one hand I THIRST for bros I can share my problems with and vice versa, but I don't want to risk finding them and then losing them.
Apathy is armor, but it's also a curse.
I remember two months ago I didn't eat or shower for six days. Men's mental health does matter like anyone who's struggling.
Another big reason people like Andrew Tate are so popular is because of the massive increase in single parent households. something like 23% of children in the US are raised by a single parent statistically most likely being the mother.
this especially impacts low income communities and minority communities for example between 50%-80% of African American children in the US are raised by a single parent.
Most of these children lack a good male role model growing up.
People don't need therapy. They need purpose. By that, I mean something beyond chasing hedonistic pleasures (that rarely is ever fulfilling).
Unfun fact: if you leave an extremely social animal like guinea pigs and hamsters (also humans) might flat line from loneliness
I wish as a german that the woman would also approache me sometimes
To be fair I feel like lots of ladies I know have unrealistic expectations of men as well like not only in looks but also emotionally and mentally.
I saw this growing up and was always confused. Men are humans, i dont get it either tbh
On the friend thing it is both. I have 2 friends from when I was young and haven't seen them in years. I in fact have only seen one of them in the last 5 years once. And that was to go to his wedding that they invited me to then asked me to be one of the photographers. ( They are a family friend.) The other one I heard was battling a rare disease and was embarrassed. I have no idea why. I would have been happy to have been there for him if he would have let me. So yes I only have 2 friends and none.
8:45 THANK YOU. I have had a stance in my public life that i have gotten consistent push back on which was that everyone is mentally ill, just to different degrees.
9:10 MRA Mens rights activist. The right views them as the male version of feminism (bringing attention to mens problems) and the left calls them oppressors and grifters. Unless you meant you forgot which was left and which was right....
12:57 I think something to keep in mind is Silent Majority Theory dictates that most people are not vocal most of the time. The ones you see are the ones moved to create something. Mentally ill people on twitter who post non stop are quite literally not normal
As a guy i already knew this but it just made de more sad realizing that it's happening to alot of other guy's
See, this is the thing. Me speaking about my issues as a man does NOT somehow mean im downplaying or ignoring the issues women face. Its not a fucking contest, right? Men dont have it better off than women, we just have different issues. We can advocate for BOTH of those things, cant we? Just because im speaking for ME doesnt mean im against YOU.
Found this video while scrolling. Decide to tap on it. And Yeah, I actually am one of those guys as well. I am shy and alone, and I'm 25.😅😢
I lost two children to medical issues before my wife left. Cant afford therapy because I lost my business paying for medical bills. Life's hard.
Stand strong king. God will bless you just don't give up on the grind. And if you don't believe in God then stand strong believe in yourself
Making friends doesn’t always require vulnerability…mostly. Different kinds of vulnerability work as well. Like not paying attention when walking through a school parking lot and getting bowled over by an suv, thankfully not getting hurt, then getting offered a ride home by the classmate that just ran you down, and when getting close to the other kids house, finding out we lived literally down the street from each other. And that is how I made two of my closest friends in high school, and the passenger in the suv is basically as close as a brother now. 22 years of friendship and family, all because I got plowed over by a classmate not paying attention to pedestrian traffic and me not paying attention to vehicular traffic.
"Why is this so hard?"
That's a good question honestly. I think that society as a whole has gotten to the point where it's no longer good at positive affirmation. If you do good, that's expected, so no praise. If you mess up a little, you get ragged on endlessly. If you mess up a lot, straight to jail. Like, there's only negative reinforcement going on now, and it's really not healthy for most people's psychological health.
There's an anime called hikikomori I recommend watching it because it explains this exact same condition between men and women and it's an anime
Its a combination of modernity meshing with the japanese tradition of working themselves literally to death striking hard.
you should ask how many compliments boys/men get over their lifetime, if you knew then the custom made videos would make a lot more sense.
You guys get compliments?
Many. But they're from family which to me is something I should ignore. If it's some friend I've known that hands me a compliment a genuine compliment.. It would be nice@@Davey647Returns
The woman I'm currently dating gave me one when we first got together and I told her that was the seventh compliment on my appearance I've ever gotten in my life.
See, I made those friends, and then I lost them. Got new friends, lost those too. Multiple cycles later, I gave up. I have no friends.
Don't worry about us, we thrive while alone. What you should worry about is you, how you will learn to build and maintain the infrastructure that society is built on. We made it for you, now you don't want us so we are walking away, going our own way. I will live happily on my sailboat fishing around the world for the rest of my life. I don't need you, you need me and you will learn that the hard way because what we built is crumbling without us maintaining it. Good luck.
It depends on your the state of mind. It gets extremely hard to change. ( you get trapped in the cycle and can't get out) You get told by everyone that you need to be a certain way, you must never show your weakness and keep everything bottle up. To the point where it extremely hard to even try to open up or let anyone know you have a problem. It goes to a point where most therapy doesn't help.
Yeah, I've just completely given up on finding a relationship, like, I know I'm too ugly to meet anyone in person and I'm not gonna use dating apps because I'll just get screamed at for being a white male Christian
that's if you even get a match and they interact with you.
i binged 3 dating apps at once for a month and got a grand total of 3 matches which 2 of those unmatched me the same day without saying anything and the third responded to me once and then never interacted with me again.
completed my account with bio, likes, music, ect.. and i'd say i'm not ugly but i'm no tom cruise either and yet i had no luck whatsoever so i ended up deleting them since i started feeling more and more depressed every time i opened those damn apps
@@toxicdragon2789 rookie mistake expecting anything out of dating apps if you're not top 1%
Yes yes yall did all we need is a hug
“There’s no way to know the rules or the goal, yet there are 7 billion people making whatever moves they want. If you lose too much, or win too much, there are penalties. You can’t pass your turn, and if you talk too much, you’ll be ostracized. There are no parameters and no way to even know the genre. This world is just a crappy game." - Sora, No Game No Life
I have some very good friends, group of 3, i meet them once a year or so. I dont date at all due to Some rather unpleasant women ive met troughout my life, Isolation is peaceful. Dont think ive had any physical contact with anyone for atleast half a year, not Even a handshake.
And yeah, Its depressing, but its better than the alternative.
I feel that our society doesn't allow men the time to think about themselves, we have to provide, we have to be the strong one through everything.
There is no time to worry about feelings,
Feelings doesn't make money
It's not fair
That might be your situation, but generally speaking, it is the opposite. We have a bunch of teenagers with too much alone time, who reflect on their feelings and forget reality, leading to reclusion and depression.
I _want_ to provide. But our society is so focused on overall economic output that it's no longer possible for me to do so. All the familial support networks that used to help people meet their life partners and get through tough times have been destroyed. Same with local communities.
It used to be so much easier for men to fulfil their life goals. We have luxuries the people of the past couldn't imagine, but the fundamentals (like owning a house) are sailing over the horizon of feasibility.
That's what's depressing.
@@ReddwarfIVA lot of people like to deride those who thinks some things may have been better in the past by calling out the worst possible things and pretending the person is advocating for those specifically: "Oh, you want to go back to when medicine sucked and [X] didn't have rights, do you?"
No, but it would be nice to once again live in a world where you could support a family reasonably on a single income. Where you could pay for college while you were in school instead of being 5-6 figures in debt. Where people formed meaningful communities IRL to help ensure their neighbor's needs are being met. Hell, one where people remembered how to interact in person and meet people.
@@kaji_sensei Exactly.
@@Zielschmer They're not "reflecting on their feelings and forgetting reality"; they're reflecting on their feelings as they pertain to reality.
This idea that men aren't remembering reality is a disgusting dismissal of men's issues.
Video's like this help guys like me feel seen, I've got like one close friend and we can't hang out much because of work stuff. I've got no one, I barely even interact online much. But I still try to talk to people in public to make friends. everyone is just too busy.
As a 35 year old guy who's never been in a relationship or even been kissed. It gets tiring being turned down and laughed at by women, or be told you're too scary because you're too tall. Swiping and trying to get matches or paying for dating sites and getting nothing. All while seeing happy couples together. Honestly, if I didn't have to, I probably wouldn't leave my room either. So I totally get the hikikomori thing.
I don't have the height or nerd, but I do have the income. 15 years ago I divorced. Ever since; my dating scene has been like yours and not even given a reason why. Maybe looks. Maybe divorce tag. Maybe something else, I don't know.
Many of us live like hikikomori without even wanting to. It's just the life that we're left with.
I’ve got maybe one friend. But mainly just me. Makes it easier anyways you can always trust yourself
I think we should take care of each other regardless of their gender, these people are crazy. How are we supposed live if we didn't care about men and women, we need each other more than anything. This gender war is crazy.
I went through a break up with my ex (that I started) and the main complaint was i never express my emotion. She asked me to show more during our "on break" and i did. After 2 days of doing so got told by her and all my friends to "stfu and handle it yourself." I did stfu and i got more depressed and till this day never express myself ever again
Stand strong King
This topic is a difficult one... The video touched on the more 'commonly known' things, like bottling up emotions, feeling isolated etc... and yeah. That's a problem. But if that was all there was to the problem, all guys would have to do is form their own tightknit groups and help each other through the vulnerabilities (We do this too). We aren't stupid, we would have solved that problem long ago if it were so simple.
As with anything human, it's complex and unique for every single person.
If you're curious about the topic, try reaching out to the guys you're familiar with and see what they'd be willing to disclose. Some guys are more willing to share, others would rather keep it to themselves.
thanks homie, yea i wont pretend to know these things on a deeper level (a lot of it im seeing is individual in nature) I just really hope people treat each other kinder, check in on each other and lift each other up
I really like your model's design, that's one of my favorite color schemes
Glad you like it!
The left keeps coming back to saying things like "we need a leftist tim pool" and "we need a leftist Joe Rogan"... Um... They had a leftist Tim Pool and Joe Rogan before they pushed them out of the Democratic party for addressing issues that needed to be addressed; their names were Tim Pool and Joe Rogan....
🙄
My family tells me I’m extremely selfish and this is somewhat why I’m usually on my own when things go to shit and no one is there when I truly need them even when I was quote “selfless” so I decided if no one’s ever going to genuinely help me I might as well fill that void with my enjoyments and pleasures.
Basically, Look up the definition of discipline. Meditate on that. Find a goal and stick to it. Be the person you want your children to remember you as.
Man, it sucks watching this and reflecting on my life just looking at how I barely talk to people and work 10 hour shifts in the middle of the night. Then knowing there is other guys like me hurts
Technically, women failed themselves, but you have to take a very long view to see how...
The 3 friends thing are the ride or die friends these are the guys when they call saying they need something you don't ask questions you just show up and be there for them
5:25 that would be ted kaczynski. and oh boy, if you havent ever heard of him, you are in for a treat. count dankula and wendigoon did a good video covering him (hour and a half long and 3 and a half hours long respectively), but the tl;dr is he was not a very good person (an understatement, i know), but he had some very good points and was very relatable to a shocking amount of people.
im seeing a lot of comments give me a heads up about him and OH BOY thats horrifying
One thing I noticed is that men are starting to get treated like women did in the past why can't we be equal
My solution? I'm not quite sure tbh, but I do know what isn't a solution, Socialism.
Most of my friends moved away and making new friends is really hard.
It's therapeutic hearing from women who are genuinely concerned about men's health.
This is kinda just what it's like to be a guy. I've been a social outcast my whole life.
Me too man me too
Congrats this made me smile my mom and brothers are the only ones who tell me these nice things so thanks
21:14 i was arguing with some people about how its unfair to blame my generation (z) for the election because we've been told we're useless lazy and whimpy and conservative boomers and other adults.
Then came the election, and both sides tried to pander to us only for our vote and nothing else.
Now after the election, the liberals also hate us cause a large portion went Republican leaving those of us who listen to both sides and choosed wisely left us with little side to want us.
And how did those people respond: "gen z truning out to be the worst generation" "gen z are failures"
Shit, i barely got my foot in the world and now im being hated for just existing
Being a millenial I can assure you that it's always been like that and it'll always stay that way.
Politics in general isn't about finding solutions, it's about finding someone to blame. Same for medias, same for people, and we'll all most likely follow the trend at some point. Sounds horrible but elections prove it, Covid proved it, and any social movement ends up destroying itself for these very same reasons.
Yeah ive always been a bit of an introverted dude, but the isolation from covid, the string of bad relationships, and my best friend of over a decade throwing me under the bus to save his own skin, i have become a hermit. I have coworkers that im friendly with but at the end of the day i go home to an empty house with no one to talk to or hang out with. I hate that i prefer it but doing anything else just makes me too nervous.
if anyone wanna consume some media about hikkikomoris, I recommend Welcome to the NHK is a great story about a man that has isolated himself due to insecurities. It was a novel written by one too.
It got anime too its pretty good