I wish people would understand that depression, anxiety, and suicide thoughts is a real medical issue. Just like diabetes I, mental illness can kill you. My Dad always says to me “just get over it!” We can’t control the agony and pain that haunts us everyday. Friends say just exercise and you will feel better. How can I exercise when I can’t even get out of bed to shower? If only people would understand just how horrible severe depression and anxiety is!
I 100% agree. My husband took his own life in July of this year. He'd suffered from anxiety, depression and opiate addiction for years but his affluent family believed mental illness to be a made up crutch for lazy & poor people. They even told people that his teenage niece, who clearly suffered from symptoms of Panic Disorder, had "racing heart syndrome." I wish they would've sided with me to encourage him to get help and that mental illness is real.
'get over it'...i heard that so often... i wish i could instantly break the leg of that person and say out loud ''There! See if you can 'get over it'!!!'' True, not many understand what real depression is all about. The pain is REAL and INTENSE. it drain all your energy. But, personally i found that writing down all my emotions, and later describing my pain, and espacially the events in my life that give me suffering, started to be a small help at first... then, after a while, i started to feel slightly better, and i was suddenly able to see things more clearly, espacially the source of my pain. i had some healing to do, some forgiving to others that had hurt me deeply, and to give myself some 'freedom'. Freedom to hate until i could put into words what they had done to me... i cried a lot. I rage... i scream... i give myself the 'freedom' to say it out loud and to liberate myself from myself for at least a little while... forgiving even myself in the end...not only others... With that done, it started to be strangely easier to 'manage' my pain... and i was able to start talking about it to a specialist that helped me dealing with growing back abilities to help me with my weaknesses. i (slowly) became better at communicating with people, being more open (yet able to stand for myself) and assertive. With more energy, i could do a little bit more for myself, eating better, healing, taking care of myself like i had taken care of others, forgetting that i even existed, that i was someone worthy to LIVE TOO!. please, help yourself and get help. YOU DESERVE TO LIVE...
Lost one of my closest friend to suicide. It happened 1 month ago, exactly today. Although we (close ones) knew she was depressed we never thought she would do such a thing. Only after her suicide I realized she was much sicker than we all could possibly think of. Mental illness is real.
16 years ago my wife committed suicide it's now 3 in the morning I just woke up from a nightmare reliving that day this for me occurs frequently. I'm glad I stumbled across this video. information is good and helpful thank you.
I lost my husband to suicide 4 weeks ago. He shot himself, I found him a few seconds later. The horror and pain are indescribable, and yes....that gnawing guilt. Your talk gave me some comfort, thank you. You mentioned the 6 month spiral of depression and anxiety, and nothing working. That was especially poignant, as my poor husband's spiral began around 18 months ago. I can't understand, I can't bear not having answers, and i can't bear that my kind, sensitive husband had to suffer so much. But I will keep plodding on, putting one foot in front of the other, for my son, and my family, and myself. Thank you again, Amy. X
I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you have enough support to deal with this tremendous loss. It's not your fault! If you ever wish to talk to someone, I'm available. I send my love, Lieke
I'm so sorry for your loss, Susy Q. I lost my Dad to suicide. May God strengthen you as time passes. He did that for me. Don't lose faith. Remember how The Christ suffered, but promises to one day "wipe every tear away." God Bless you & your circle of loved ones.
@@sunyata2816 Try to stay strong and try to take one day at a time. I understand how depression feels like now and for a while I no longer had the will to live. However, there was a small bit of hope inside of me that still wanted to live and somehow I managed to pull through. It was very difficult and i was scared to be alone because my mind would wonder off. Stay strong.
@@sunyata2816 I feel the same way. Loneliness and isolation. My husband shot himself 3 months ago. I can't believe my so called friends are nowhere to be found...
I don't know how she got thru all these suicides.She is a very strong woman. I wish I was that strong.I struggle every day with depression and anxiety and chronic pain.
@@fthis1234567 my partner hung himself then 6 years later my 17 year old son hung himself....would you say, it must be my fault as I was closest to them? You've obviously not lost anyone close to you through suicide because if you had you wouldn't come out with such a crass comment.
I Am Morgan I got the same impression as that guy up top, she seems kind of cold about all these things, almost like a social path , how can you go take a Jazz class and start asking what you can gain from your husbands death right away , she seems a little crazy to me and I feel bad for her kids .
You ARE strong. You were strong till now, you can believe you are more likely to continue being able to be strong than not. The fact that it was hard doesn't mean you weren't strong, the fact that you're still here is the very proof that you're strong
Every single thing she said is 100% accurate. I am a suicide survivor, and a person who has lost 2 of the most beloved people in my life to suicide. This woman is telling everyone EXACTLY what it feels like. God bless her.
I SO AGREE!!!. I too, along with you,... and all of us here. Are on this horrifying, unbearable nose dive. 🙏for YOU , and all of us. May we heal ASAP !!!🎉
chavruta2000 I'm a 3 time suicider. I've never wanted to be here. Since I was a tiny little girl I can remember not wanting to be here. I was deeply sad to the very pit of my Soul for no reason. I'm 50+, at least now I have a plethora of reasons for the sadness. All the meds in the World do not cover what we feel 24/7.
Seven months in and I relate to every single word she says. The guilt eats you alive but I know it’s not my fault. I tell myself that every day. My husband was terribly depressed and not in his right mind, The unanswered questions, the uncontrollable grief, but I’m still here and I’m still alive. I will march on for myself and my kids. I loved him enough to not want him to suffer, he was not selfish, in fact I think he was incredibly brave to do what he did but oh my God I miss him and I wish more than anything in the world that this terrible deadly illness hadn’t got hold of him.
Lily 11 I can completely relate. I lost my husband a little over a month ago to depression as well. It has been a constant battle everyday to stay strong for my two children.
Going forward is so very important. I was not hit with ongoing guilt, yes I had it, some how I was able to let it go. Reminds me of all those that said they understood, or call if you need anything. Unless you’ve been down this highway there is no way “you understand”. I was lucky to have an incredible support system. God be with you.
@@gabbyvargas88 LOVE is the greatest power, its the love from my brother that keeps me alive along with my 2 beautiful cats! Stay strong its really hard Bless you!
Sorry for your loss, we lost our son 04/13/22 to suicide due to depression and addictions. He is in a better place as much as we would want him here with us.
The last breath one takes before they take or try to take their own life is one cold, lifeless breath. In your mind and your heart, the world is over, and you finally have control of what happens to you. It's not that nobody in their right mind commits suicide, cause if you are still capable to think with reason, you still will have some hope. The last moments before one takes their life are full of nothingness, nothing makes any sense to you at that time. The family members or friends that love you feel that you betrayed them, but what you feel is that they're better off without you, that you are a burden for them, that you are a burden for the world, that even you are better off without yourself. Suicide isn't an act of cowardice either, cause when you reach that far down the spiral of life, there is no courage left and there is no fear, it's just an endless void. Your soul dies inside you before you take your own life physically. And even if you don't succeed at it, you're never fully alive ever again. I've been there.
@ Andy Xypher I love that some people get it, in addition you put it so eloquently, cheers Andy, hoping you are still among us, or maybe that is selfish, maybe you deserve more, whatever that is !
Andy Xypher some of them do it because they are simply done with life and people around them. sometimes suicide is an act of love towards oneself. they wanted to stop the pain and suicide is their only way out. I know that because I think of it everyday and it's only a matter of time before I have the courage to do it.
I get up , although I don't know why really, every work day and go do my thing. From the outside? I look " okay" . Inside? I'm like, what the hell is the point of even doing any of this when it's entirely pointless to begin with? At which point , I set down what I have going on and wander off and that same fucking cycle of thought begins to come *screaming* back at me . My hands and fingers might be busy,? But my head is just on over drive and there's no "off" switch to engage. My sleep pattern is so seriously screwed up it's a literal wonder I can drive the short distance and not hit something . And you are right Franco, it's *every damn day*.
I love how plainly and honestly she speaks about suicide. She is a huge inspiration to those who are in danger of committing themselves. It takes tremendous strength to carry on living despite the depression and guilt.
Sending good positive energy from my heart to yours. Bless you and be here tomorrow. If you'd like places for info please reply as such. Most of all...🕊
I like her. The way she presented this issue, her personal take on everything and her coping strategies. She seems very intelligent, caring and loving.
to anyone who has gotten themself out of a dark place mentally, just know, you're really strong for doing that. I've been there, and it took me years to get out of it. finding the right people is hard, and if you find the wrong person, it might shove you down even harder. it might change your life for the worse. but if you got passed it before, just know I'm really proud of you, and that I'm cheering behind you on the internet.
@@MissyLintI lost my wife to suicide while I was in the next room. Three weeks ago going on four. I don't know what to do it's like my universe imploded.
Hi I lost my husband 2 months back. All my friends and his are reassuring me that it wasn't my fault. I also feel it wasn't my fault. But the guilt comes back again and again. How did you help yourself please tell me.
I lived with suicidal ideation for 16 years. I was misdiagnosed 6 years ago with bipolar 2 when I was really BPD (borderline personality disorder). I've had 3 attempts result in hospitalization, last one being a really close call.. well I haven't had an attempt in almost 2 years but I started taking my mental health seriously when I got rediagnosed BPD. I'm now over a year seperated from my ex husband and I've never been happier! I finally am moving forward with alot of hope for the future. It's a long journey but it's possible to work towards a fulfilling life
So i was sitting here 9 and a half years after my partner's suicide still stuck in a rut and your video is THE FIRST in all those years that accurately describes exactly what I felt/still feel....the only difference is you were smart...you were so right about fearing to love again, I lost both my parents in the same year I lost my partner. I let the overwhelming grief destroy me. I didn't turn to drugs or alcohol but I avoided anything that might hurt me in life. Waffling here, because I still cry like a baby when I remember and my brain turns to mush. But thank you for putting this into words
This woman is a super hero, truly. Finding the formulae to become successful as a person and all that amidst not only the suicides of her loved ones but also the constant idea that you could follow that same path. I cannot see myself ever coming out of the thought “today will be the day I die” that I have in my mind every morning or “i hope I don’t wake up another morning” each night before I fall asleep without even realizing.
I am so sorry for all of the pain so many of you have expressed here. I wish such stories of suicide loss and grief were rare. I wish that all of you who find life so difficult, and who fight back the urge to end it with astonishing strength, didn't have to face such struggles each day, each hour, each minute. May the next day, hour, minute be easier on you; may your burdens be lighter. Bless all of you in your journey. Bless everyone here in this comments section and elsewhere on this Earth, everyone who aches with the pain of living and reaches for hope despite everything. May you all find joy around the bend. May we all remember to carry each other. Take care, and know that you're not alone.
So very sorry for every single one of our losses ! Reading comments just bawling - my husband took his life and I witnessed this horror . He was a very good person - I did not see it coming ,. He was very much loved - there is so very much to this story ! So without praying and God - I would be gone or very much insane . I am a bit crazy with ptsd - and sorrow - now turned to deep depression - but I'm still here . I wish I could hug each one of you - that are sad , have known great loss - and say something that would help , I am thankful for this video its important her message - I will be praying for us all. God bless you - each one
Thank you SO much for doing this talk, my daughter took her own life on September 5, 2019, and I have been so lost. I like your practical solutions to moving forward with those you love that are here still with you. I like the list. Thank you, Amy.
So sorry to your loss. My daughter best friend from college just committed suicide. It is unbearable. I can feel the pain and hope you recover and resume.
Fraser, my son took his life 26/7/21 , 20 year old beautiful person. I listen to people who have suffered through friends family who leave us via sucicide. I havnt had a single night sober since he left us, I work every day, I put on a show every day, I try not to be bitter or angry but I honestly believe I'm now in auto mode, I don't know what keeps me getting out of bed everyday, I think mainly because Fraser would want me too.... We all grieve differently, we need to find what fits and works for us or we won't be able to move forward, hopefully one day I will find someone or something that fits xxxx
Lost my son to suicide 5 years ago. I consider myself a veteran. I didn't want to, think I would, ever imagine, fathom I would walk this road of life but here I am. And I am still alive.
My mother commited suicide. I promise myself not to be like her and be strong but I lost my almost 9yr old baby last October. 11 days before his birthday. I will continue to live this life until we meet on the other side. I find comfort in our creator and mama Mary 🙏🏻
Your mam was strong. I assume.she was fighting a long time.with deseases like depression. Therfore you have to be brave everyday and committing suicide is an act wich needs incredible strength to do.
I was 9 when my sister killed herself. I’m now 15. There isn’t a day that goes by where something doesn’t remind me of her. I miss her dearly. I do wish she were around to watch me grow and be here to support me. Some days I blame her for hurting me in this way. Some days I blame myself for putting her in so much stress. Some days I blame god too. I blame my parents. I blamed everyone. I regret so much. I regret not bonding with her. I regret it all.
keep your head up keep pushing foward i truly beleive our souls go way farther than here on earth i really do ....try not to hold blame or guilt when we get to this point its harder to be here than not to....but just know our souls go way beyond this earth dear .....try not to blame god......he is a loving god dear ...... he didnt do this to hurt you or let it happen to hurt you i promise you that ......he has somewhere so much more beautiful than this place here for us.......put comfort in your soul doll or try to
It's devastating reading all these comments about people who lost loved ones to suicide. My goodness. I am so sorry. It is NOT your fault. I tried to commit suicide 7 times last year. Simply because my demons were/are overwhelming. It is not anyone's fault. God bless you all.
I heard the first shot and didn't know what it was, I rushed to the bathroom and saw him sitting with the gun, recocking it and I still couldn't understand what was happening. My brain just turned off. All I could say was, "What are you doing?" As I watched him blow his head off. The remorse I feel, I spread over our entire culture. We are all responsible for every suicide because we are continuing to accept a culture that values wealth and success over love and kindness. We have lost touch with what it means to be human, and that is the most difficult realization for me to bear, even more than my grief.
Boom excellently said. The DSM diagnose based on your ability or inability to produce so depressing and no one takes this serious cause they can't see the bruises
🙏that experience was so horribly unbearable.... pray for you & your family 🫶 I'm unfortunate to be experiencing this mental nightmare. I hope I can continue to keep fighting this 🙏
I'm sorry for your lost loved ones. I needed to hear this. EVERY day I talk myself out of not killing myself but killing the pain grief and regret that screams at me all day long. Your sister and husband aren't having anymore stress. They don't have the walls screaming at them anymore. Please try and be happy for them. They were hurting.
@@Lougallops i also lost a husband to this. Could you please tell me if survival gets better with time? Also a lot of strength to you and your daughter. 🙏🏻
So sorry you had to go through this and thankyou for sharing your experiences and copimg mechanisms. After losing my partner to suicide and then my son hung himself in woodland aged 17 I find this Ted talk so relatable. Grief is not orderly, it's a rollercoaster. Hearing a teenager laughing on the bus last week turned my whole day upside down. Doctors put me on all sorts of meds which just suppressed the necessary emotional and cognitive processes of grieving. I still hardly leave the house. I came off meds cold turkey which my doctor recorded in my notes as 'refusing treatment' I did exactly the same as you..I needed something to replace the dark and negative thoughts in my head so I signed up for an access course with the Open University which was amazing kind of therapy for me. Work is all online so no pressure to leave the house for classes. I'm now in the last year of a history degree. It's given my brain something other to chew on besides the emptiness I feel. It's never goes away..you might think it's easing then you hear a kid laugh on a bus and it sets off a thousand memories, all memories lead to the morning the police knocked on my door and asked if I had a son and that he had "self harmed and is now deceased"....I still hear that sentence in my head, everyday at some point.
I lost my husband to suicide just this past Thanksgiving Day. I have no words to anyone who has been affected by suicide. I wish I had words but its just too soon because I am struggling with trauma, survivors guilt and incredible sorrow. If you are suicidal please please please dont think you are a burden to others because you aren't, you aren't. You are loved.
Hi baby Am Ben easygoing person I like good and do good I like friends that have understanding and fun to be with I love arts, museum and music l lunch luxury every Eve I compose poem and scripts am a civil engineer and a contractor I work for company and I work in Asia,africa,and Europe I need a woman who understands What love is all about, to be my own I saw your picture and I am impressed you're beautiful and baby you shines like a diamond springs In Sky nicely like flowers in the garden of Eden's I close my eyes all I is you at first sight I felt the energy of Sun rays angel'wings written love on it I love you so much baby I want a wonderful woman will love me and know who I am and be mine forever i hope You will reply soonest thanks
I found this video very helpful. It describes exactly how I felt and am still feeling about my fiancé's suicide 6 months ago. It's unbearable grief, sadness, and the GUILT is the worst feeling of all.
Hi baby Am Ben easygoing person I like good and do good I like friends that have understanding and fun to be with I love arts, museum and music l lunch luxury every Eve I compose poem and scripts am a civil engineer and a contractor I work for company and I work in Asia,africa,and Europe I need a woman who understands What love is all about, to be my own I saw your picture and I am impressed you're beautiful and baby you shines like a diamond springs In Sky nicely like flowers in the garden of Eden's I close my eyes all I is you at first sight I felt the energy of Sun rays angel'wings written love on it I love you so much baby I want a wonderful woman will love me and know who I am and be mine forever i hope You will reply soonest thanks
Mercy. I lost Paul last year in March, 2022. Natural death. Grief is just so awful. Everyday is just grief. I’m Catholic. I pray. Grateful for Paul. Just alone.
Thank you for this speech. I need it. I am a good mother, a loving wife, and maybe a good siblings. My family is beautiful. But inside I feel so weak and empty. The only reason that I'm here is I am afraid to hurt my love ones.
I lost my wife to suicide recently. She was sufferring from depression for a long time. I thought I had it under control but completely underestimated. The pain of losing her will never go away. On top of that, I will carry the guilt of letting her down till I breathe. I pray God that no one else should undergo the sufferings of losing their loved one (esp. to suicide).
Thank you for this, I needed it. My mother attempted suicide a few times, her father had also died by suicide. Then my cousin hung himself in 2015. Two years later my husband jumped off a bridge onto the turnpike. Then my other cousin also hung herself. Then in 2020 my boyfriend shot himself in front of me. A few months later my cousin's daughter also hung herself, she was 14. It's so hard to keep going after all of this. But everything you said really helped me put a new perspective on things, thank you.
My son Steve died by suicide April 23,2015 That's the day my hole world fell apart....he was amazing....I haven't laughed in 3 years.i feel so guilty for not seeing it.
Sometimes the guilt can be motivating, inspiring. When I was in 8th grade a girl I had never spoken to but noticed All The Time... killed herself. Our only interaction was her smiling at me in the hallway. The guilt I felt was immense, and continues to be. She was friends with so many of my friends, why didn't I talk to her? After all, I was suicidal too, maybe we could have helped each other. She did help me though, because of her I found I could not kill myself even though I desperately wanted to and sometimes still found myself pacing around that bridge. And because of her I take the topic Very seriously. I am always there to listen whenever anyone needs me because I am so afraid of losing someone i love that way. I actually met my current girlfriend who I can see myself marrying all because of that girl. Because my girlfriend, before we met, posted a suicide note on her blog. I prayed and prayed that she had not succeeded. She hadn't, thank god. She was planning on attempting again though, so since we lived in the same town coincidentally I said that we should meet in person before she died. Even if I was going to lose her anyway, I wanted the opportunity to meet her, to hear her voice, to have a chance to maybe encourage her to live. That's exactly what happened. I loved her almost immediately, so I asked her to be mine after only hanging out a few times. It's now been 2 years together. Last year in May though, she attempted suicide again. A much more serious attempt, an attempt that really almost took her life. But I saved her. After not hearing from her for a day I took the 1.5 hour bus ride to her house and was able to confirm her attempt and get her dad and an ambulance. We're ironically quite lucky she overdosed though, because otherwise I wouldn't have had the time to get her. And at that time, I didn't have her father's phone number. Since she got out of the hospital I have lived with her in her dad's house. We support eachother and get eachother through the hard times. I've had to accept that I may still lose her to suicide, but because of the guilt I feel about that girl we lost nearly 10 years ago now, I was ever able to know her.
@@frashiahwangari2177 It may be that some of us can stand the pain and some of us cannot. Some of us can even help bear the pain of another while bearing our own all the while. Love is the opposite of apathy. Some times we love and some times we're apathetic, it depends on our season.
My daughter was 18 when she took her life less than a year ago. Im a wreck, and this is the first video I allowed myself to listen to. I haven't had any counseling and im hanging with a tough crowd. I was couch surfing when it occurred so my balance was already lost and now I have to smoke a lot of weed to even talk. I cry ALL the time. And I am awarw that I have to afford spend the rest of my life with this truth. I am a reason for it all. Not the only reason but part. When she was little I was on drugs and figured she was safe with my mom and she was, but my actions created a hole in her soul. She yearned for A mom and dad and she spent many nights not knowing where I was. I was so caught up in my stupid bullshit I had no idea what I was doing to her mentality. We went to many counseling appointments and I was always understanding . Then after six Years clean I started using and she was unhappy with me when she decided never to see anyone again. It is so hard to see a future and im terrified of death. And the pain hasn't lighten up at all. Ten months later and I still catch my breath in disbelief that my babygirl is dead. And im so freakin lost
Nikki Gonzales i dont like my parents and they lived with me. i also wanted to kill myself when i was younger. i think its logical though. theres not actually a point to doin any of this shit. i think suicidal people are in fact thinkin more clearly then the people that stay busy and act like theres a point to workin so hard to aquire stuff. theres no point
I hear you loud and clear. I am a single mom and have mental health issues. When my mom passed from cancer my son was 2 and 1/2 years old. Because I was adopted the connection to my mom, though we fought a lot and I was a rotten teenager, the fact was, she was the only thing I really had. When she died, I died. I still did what I had to for my son but I was emotionally absent. He is now a teen himself and sadly he is lost. He parties on the weekends, only weed and alcohol, but he suffers from anxiety, he has OCD issues and EDD - emotional dysregulation, in other words when things go wrong he will rage in an instant, say things he may not mean, apologize later. By being empty at a crucial time in his life I blame myself for his pain, his choices, his troubles. Am I alive today, even knowing that I messed up his life? NO. So, as I said before, I hear you and to be honest am scared to death that one day I could be sharing what you have shared here with us. I am so very sorry for your loss, for the guilt you feel, that you have to numb it with drugs. I do the same with prescribed medication. My response to you may sound selfish because I am still unable to change, especially for my son, but each day I ... I don't know. I just pray that God will take pity on my child and give him what I can't. I am commenting 11 months after your share, I hope you have had the chance to heal just a bit. I would never presume that you should be okay today, mourning and grief are different for all of us. Be as well as you can. Alyssa
What I would say to you above (and to others), is get some counseling and do therapy. It helped me. I lost my father few years back, and it was a TREMENDOUS SETBACK in my life. I seemed to spiral downward, but I found a therapist and she helped me gain more perspective on it. So, don't just sit in your grief and/or your own pity / remorse / your own thoughts ... Get out of the house, find a therapist, and start making progress on working through the emotions. Don't just pray or, I say, PRAY IT AWAY. Actually, take action, and it will help you get stronger and really be the person that you can be.
If you read the other posts of loved ones who commit suicide, they were successful well adjusted people without the problems you say your daughter had. It's not you it was inside her mind. That's the truth.
i think saying a little prayer from to bottom of your heart is the best treatment in dealing with harsh moments in your life. these are my thoughts about it.
You’re still here take it as it comes dont try to exit . dont have to end it take the pain, let it stay in you as long as it wants. FEAR NOT as you suffer, you should know it is harmless. all the guilt, pain will strengthen you. purifies you. if you are empty , no one can robb you if you are dead already, no one can take your life. just be who you are as you are. embrace your self and go your own way with a good friend named humility.
🌟Thanxs heaps for ur kind words the support gives me strength... live one day at a time as best as I can ... our awesome sons make the world a better place.... blessings of health safety happiness harmony to all.. 🤗💌🥰💝🐻💕😇💖🙏🦋
My beloved brother committed suicide in February, we are still sometimes in the snot stage. I still feel guilt like if I'd only known I could have (insert action). The edges of the pain are becoming less sharp but the unanswered questions keep nagging. Thankyou for your very frank approach to a very difficult subject. God bless you.
This video has 62 dislikes and that makes no sense to me. Amy is the most self-reflecting and intellectual person I've heard deliver their thoughts in the clearest and understandable way possible. Maybe I'm partial to her just because I can identify with her in more aspects than not, but none the less this is something people should know. Because whether or not you've had to deal with suicide, it is great know these tools and perspectives to be more ready for it than knowing nothing at all. I came here because I only heard a few sentences in the song "Fragile - I want to be cold" and had to know more. Thank you for publishing this video, giving her time on your show and thank you to the artist who put her message in your song. If you read this, know you have made at least one person become a little stronger.
I have my own experience in terms of loosing my girlfriend & getting the suicide attempts wrong. I'll spare the details. Once you've done the devilish deed, its that aftermath of those raw emotions, which hurts so much, by those left to pick up their lives, if they can.
Well the dislikes are from ppl that don't understand how bad the person felt when they did what they did. You just need to try and put yourself in their shoes and that was the only thing they thought they could do whether they regret it is something we will never know but I can bet that they probably so but it is too late now and at the time it was what they needed to do
Thankyou, this was so healing and helpful to those who go through this, including myself. I pray this woman who has lived through so much loss can feel love again and trust it enough to be authentic to herself. Her words have touched my broken heart as well. 💜
My Mother was a suicide on Jan 8, 1983. I have always felt that I could have stopped it. I was out having fun and eating. I have been over eating since, every day. That makes me feel guilt even more. I was so mad at her in the beginning. I truly don't ever believe I will ever not feel guilt. Sep 2018
I hope you come to the place where you stop punishing yourself for your mother's choice to end her life. There is no way you could have prevented it anymore than I could have stopped my cousin hanging himself or my lovely best friend jumping from a 4 storey car park leaving 5 children motherless who had recently become fatherless. I had to get to the place where I let them go, respecting their freedom to choose their manner of death whilst deciding to embrace my choice to live well. X
Ever since I was born all that I want is to die…….I had a bipolar disorder, I was depressed, I was addicted to drugs, and I felt empty. but at the age of 18, I met Jesus and He saved my life. He took away my bipolar, my depression, my addictions, and my suicidal thoughts. and I trully believe that He can do the same for you if you come to Him. God loves you..….more than you could ever imagine. I pray that every one of you will always find happiness and love in your life. God bless.
I've lost 3 people to suicide. It hurts. But the thing I want to say is that as I read these comments I feel for each and everyone of you and hope that you can find relief and healing as each keep going forward.
My ex-partner and close friend committed suicide 6 days ago. He jumped under a train. I used to be his caretaker before I left him. I feel guilty and so, so sad. I miss him. Rest in peace, M. 🤍 I'm sorry I failed you.
I am going through something very similar. The guilt I feel from leaving him and not being there eats me alive everyday. Knowing the pain I am so sorry that you feel this way. I hope this podcast helps you heal ❤️
I believe people want to suicide not because they are not loved, but because they stop being able to love themselves and do not believe anyone can love who they really are behind all those mask they wear to hide who they really are. They do that because they don't believe anyone can love them 'as they really are'. it is a self prophecy of 'i'm not enough...' Most of the time, no one around them is to blame. They often blame themselves for not being 'loveable' because they cannot see how they can be 'loved'. It is often a false impression in their mind that others are way better at everything than they are, and so, feel like they are mostly worthless... the truth is, we are all worthy. Unless you have killed someone willingly, i think everyone is worthy. But life is often projecting a false idea of reality. Social pressure is terrible. And some people are more susceptible to the influence of the outside world than others. Self destructive behaviors are a plenty, from suicide to taking drugs, alcoolism, eating disorders, etc... Suicide is a way of communicating pain, like all those ailments are. Lack of love for oneself can be as destructive as lack of love from others...if not more so.
There are many reasons for suicide. People commit suicide because they are in physical or emotional pain, or both. There is a point where the pain is too much. They’ve been through too much, and know there is more pain on the way.
I too have suffered the crippling alcoolism. Sorry, humor is my shield from all that we're discussing here. What you said, couldn't have been put better.
I passed through a long period of low grade depression, which never spireled into fully fledged clinical depression. But it was enough to allow me to understand that I wouldn't have wanted to experience more than I did and in addition it was enough to allow me to know that saying ''Just do this or that'' is not helpful. My heart goes out to all experiencing depression. I wish I had the secret to just make it go away for everyone as I wish I had had the secret to make it go away for a family member who took his life 9 years ago.
I have struggled with suicidal thoughts for a few years and it is agonising. But after losing my best friend 3 months ago, I can tell you that that is absolutely the worst thing that has ever happened to me. I have been through abuse and severe mental anguish before, but losing him truly killed me.
Love your most compelling talks on Suicide. Amy Biancolli . Sometimes , people engulfed in guilt are looking for answers to cope and deal with their loved one in suicide tragedy. Your talks have surely gave me insights, wisdom and courage to help others affected. Life goes on but no need to feel guilty because it will affect people and that can take them in a downward spiral. I believe in prayers and praying for the people committed suicide can release burdens of guilt .I love it when you said something about mystery and that aspects of ourselves know no answers but to assume. My heartfelt empathise to all who are affected by loved ones in suicide tragedy and to the victims themselves. Only God knows..
Thank you. Beautifully raw & real. I am so sorry for your losses. Your pain must be so great. I know you have helped some rethink this move & saved many more from pain that you so generously shared with us with this talk. God bless you & yours.
I lost my mother to suicide. I can tell you one thing for sure: yes, it is other people’s fault. Yes, something could have been done. Yes, guilt and shame must be applied to all relatives, friends, doctors, and employers of the deceased person, because even the littlest act of kindness can save someone’s life. We fail and kill the most vulnerable, the most sensitive, the kindest people and accepting the responsibility for our actions however difficult it is is a must. So thank you for the talk, but every victim of suicide with the exception of criminals is our fault and responsibility.
This is the best and only TEDxTalk about suicide that truly resonated with me. My military veteran husband took his life due to PTSD-induced depression 3 weeks ago. Your 'list' of feelings immediately after your husband took his life is exactly what I'm going through. I, like you, also have 3 teenage children. Many similarities btwn us, which may be why your story/words resonate so much for me. Thank you for sharing your story 🤍🤍
It's been 6 months since my comment above, and I just wanted to share that I have come back to your talk over these months. Still struggling HARD with the guilt, but still putting one foot in front of the other and moving (very slowly) forward. Thank you again for your talk 💞💔
@@k8tina I'm just seeing your comments now. I'm so, so profoundly sorry we have such a devastating loss in common, but I'm grateful you found some help in my story. Bless you and your kids as you continue to move forward through the tangles of grief & guilt. ❤
thank you Amy for this TED talk this has helped me beyond any expectation your words and your truth has made a massive impact on my own loss and I am just so grateful for your word.
wow. she's been through a lot. i get the guilt part. i think its human nature. deciding to be of help to others helped me let go of "my" pain. loving others is very theraputic.
Your talk is so real and so raw and so relatable and I've not lost anyone but I feel like I lose myself sometimes...so thank you for not giving us a presentation but a conversation...that's what this is!
I lost my son to suicide 3 months ago, I related to all the guilt you describe and I am grateful for all the support I received through this crisis and cognitively I understand I need to move forward with my own life but I don’t know if the emptiness and sadness will ever leave, probably not. Thank you for your speak it was helpful to know I am not alone in my grief.
I lost my little brother, 18 years old, to it too on September 25th, it’s been hard watching my parents go through this let alone going through it myself, I wish you luck, tell your boys story, I need to tell my brothers
@@jjut6182 Thank you for caring, this is very difficult for families, blessing to yours. It has been 6 months now for our family we are living with our grief
@@channelseeker7 thank you much, we all can’t believe we’re coming up on one month next week, we don’t know how we’re doing it but we are. Good luck to you and your family
I'm chronically ill/disabled and have sever panic attacks and depression. Also chronic pain. I am physicaly and mentally Ill. I am so lucky to have A supportive family. When my parents and grandma pass I don't know what I can do. I survived two attempts. I am so sorry for the loss of the speaker. I couldn't imagine.
I have watched, read and heard almost everything about suicide on the internet after my husband took his own life. This video has been my strength. I hope to carry the power that this woman carries inspite god putting her on test again and again.
I think it's important to recognize that this is equally valid for the family members of those who attempted suicide and were unsuccessful. This is a great talk, and I really appreciate that it's shared here. To all those in the comments section, complaining about another "woe is me" family member talk, I'm glad you don't understand. I pray you never have to. To those trying to assess the mental state of those who commit suicide, why bother? Does it really matter? These were people, the same as you or I, and now they're dead. Treat them with respect. Don't bother kicking beehives that don't need to be kicked. For all those who have contemplated suicide, I pray for you, and I hope you get the help you need.
It is so sad that anyone is so miserable that they end their one and only life early. I always want to do it but still afraid I won't be successful and end up living through it ultimately making my situation worse than before. I wish it was not so hard, like you could just take one pill and you would just fall asleep permanently.
The only thing left to even feel guilty about is begrudging your loved one's happiness... because you somewhat still feel that it was more important for them to stick around just to make you happier .. even though that might not have even been possible under the circumstances 🙏❤️ too!
My blessing and prayers for all who have lost loved and dear ones, in the comments below and to Amy here. There is much to share and care about amongst us all and a good starting place is genuinely showing patience and compassion as that makes space and brings in much-needed security to catch up and deal with the horrors of life. Please, stay gentle and kind. Amen.
Thank you so much for your speech. I lost my mother suddenly , 1 yr before your sister died. My mom had a heart attack. Here on Friday, dead Sunday night. This past May, she would've celebrated her 99th birthday. Had both she and my dad were still alive, they would've celebrated their 78th wedding anniversary. He would've been 103. I spent so man years with my grief, anger and sadness, it manifested itself into depression, anxiety and there are moments where I'm in my dark space. I had 2 strokes 8 yrs apart, and everyday is a struggle for me. Yet I press on. What else am I to do right? I don't think we ever "get" over it. We learn to deal with it and continue to go on with our lives. We tell ourselves, this is their wish for us. Yes, I'm in therapy, and it helps somewhat. And yes, some days are harder to get outta bed than others, but we do it. Again, thank you for your words of comfort, and wisdom. And you are so right. If we made the rules, we could've changed history. Spared ourselves so much grief, and be the people we were before all this happened. God bless.
Then make make your own decision on what is best for you. Don't listen to others who promise "you can get through it". They say that because first they are not suffering themselves at the moment and they don't know that you can get through it without the loss of everything that makes you human and life worth anything. And the other reason is that THEY have severe Death anxiety and are unconsciously terrified of any reminders of their own death. (Read Ernest Becker's book. Denial of Death.)
I lost my baby daddy/ fiancé to suicide a year and half ago… he hung himself in front of me and I’ll never know why he did that… I’m a strong woman for still being here and witnessing that…. But dealing with my grief I had turned to drugs and sleeping around… just to get that feeling again.. but January 26th,2022 I had a overdose at my job and I’m glad I’m here I haven’t done any of those drugs again since that had happened to me that opened my eyes.. I’m meant to be here …. I just miss him so much and I wish he didn’t do that to me or our daughter….
I wish you luck on your journey, I lost my baby brother to suicide on September 25th, we were all home, he walked out into the driveway and used a rifle, we all have to believe that he didn’t do it to hurt any of us but he did it to save himself, from what we may never know but I believe it’s from the world. I wish no one ever had to experience stuff like you, or me.
This was super helpful because I’m going through this right now my brother committed suicide yesterday so this is all very fresh in the moments that she talked about I’m going through all of those right now and I’m just grateful that there’s hope
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I wish people would understand that depression, anxiety, and suicide thoughts is a real medical issue. Just like diabetes I, mental illness can kill you. My Dad always says to me “just get over it!” We can’t control the agony and pain that haunts us everyday. Friends say just exercise and you will feel better. How can I exercise when I can’t even get out of bed to shower? If only people would understand just how horrible severe depression and anxiety is!
So true jessica...same here
Hope your father has a change to see this video.
I 100% agree. My husband took his own life in July of this year. He'd suffered from anxiety, depression and opiate addiction for years but his affluent family believed mental illness to be a made up crutch for lazy & poor people. They even told people that his teenage niece, who clearly suffered from symptoms of Panic Disorder, had "racing heart syndrome." I wish they would've sided with me to encourage him to get help and that mental illness is real.
I totally get you!! I understand 😭
'get over it'...i heard that so often... i wish i could instantly break the leg of that person and say out loud ''There! See if you can 'get over it'!!!''
True, not many understand what real depression is all about. The pain is REAL and INTENSE. it drain all your energy.
But, personally i found that writing down all my emotions, and later describing my pain, and espacially the events in my life that give me suffering, started to be a small help at first... then, after a while, i started to feel slightly better, and i was suddenly able to see things more clearly, espacially the source of my pain.
i had some healing to do, some forgiving to others that had hurt me deeply, and to give myself some 'freedom'. Freedom to hate until i could put into words what they had done to me... i cried a lot. I rage... i scream...
i give myself the 'freedom' to say it out loud and to liberate myself from myself for at least a little while... forgiving even myself in the end...not only others... With that done, it started to be strangely easier to 'manage' my pain... and i was able to start talking about it to a specialist that helped me dealing with growing back abilities to help me with my weaknesses.
i (slowly) became better at communicating with people, being more open (yet able to stand for myself) and assertive. With more energy, i could do a little bit more for myself, eating better, healing, taking care of myself like i had taken care of others, forgetting that i even existed, that i was someone worthy to LIVE TOO!.
please, help yourself and get help. YOU DESERVE TO LIVE...
Lost one of my closest friend to suicide. It happened 1 month ago, exactly today. Although we (close ones) knew she was depressed we never thought she would do such a thing. Only after her suicide I realized she was much sicker than we all could possibly think of. Mental illness is real.
16 years ago my wife committed suicide it's now 3 in the morning I just woke up from a nightmare reliving that day this for me occurs frequently. I'm glad I stumbled across this video. information is good and helpful thank you.
I’m sorry Keith 🤗
All my best, Keith.
All my best, Keith. I'm so sorry.
Whatever is fuelling your strength and courage, may it forever continue.
I hope you can find peace of mind some day.
I lost my husband to suicide 4 weeks ago. He shot himself, I found him a few seconds later. The horror and pain are indescribable, and yes....that gnawing guilt. Your talk gave me some comfort, thank you. You mentioned the 6 month spiral of depression and anxiety, and nothing working. That was especially poignant, as my poor husband's spiral began around 18 months ago. I can't understand, I can't bear not having answers, and i can't bear that my kind, sensitive husband had to suffer so much. But I will keep plodding on, putting one foot in front of the other, for my son, and my family, and myself. Thank you again, Amy. X
I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you have enough support to deal with this tremendous loss. It's not your fault! If you ever wish to talk to someone, I'm available.
I send my love, Lieke
Susy Q
stay stong and hopefully you can overcome this an jus know if you ever need to talk im here for you
George Thank you so much. Some time has passed now, and things are a little better.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Susy Q. I lost my Dad to suicide. May God strengthen you as time passes. He did that for me. Don't lose faith. Remember how The Christ suffered, but promises to one day "wipe every tear away." God Bless you & your circle of loved ones.
Susy Q I understand my brother shot himself i suffered from guilt.
This woman has suffered so much loss. I hope the rest of her life is filled with love and joy.
she is lucky people were there for her. Many times we end up alone, as others seem to treat is as a contagious disease.
Yes, you find out who your "true" friends and loved ones are. And, that's not all bad.
@@sunyata2816 Try to stay strong and try to take one day at a time. I understand how depression feels like now and for a while I no longer had the will to live. However, there was a small bit of hope inside of me that still wanted to live and somehow I managed to pull through. It was very difficult and i was scared to be alone because my mind would wonder off. Stay strong.
@@macbeavers6938 THERE IS REALLY NO ONE THEN !!!!!
@@sunyata2816 I feel the same way. Loneliness and isolation. My husband shot himself 3 months ago. I can't believe my so called friends are nowhere to be found...
@@lorinelson8152 I'm sorry to hear about your husband and your friends. I hope that you find the strength and pull through.
I don't know how she got thru all these suicides.She is a very strong woman. I wish I was that strong.I struggle every day with depression and anxiety and chronic pain.
@@fthis1234567 my partner hung himself then 6 years later my 17 year old son hung himself....would you say, it must be my fault as I was closest to them? You've obviously not lost anyone close to you through suicide because if you had you wouldn't come out with such a crass comment.
I Am Morgan I got the same impression as that guy up top, she seems kind of cold about all these things, almost like a social path , how can you go take a Jazz class and start asking what you can gain from your husbands death right away , she seems a little crazy to me and I feel bad for her kids .
You ARE strong. You were strong till now, you can believe you are more likely to continue being able to be strong than not. The fact that it was hard doesn't mean you weren't strong, the fact that you're still here is the very proof that you're strong
Unless someone has chronic pain like yourself and myself they have no idea what we are going through
My ❤️ goes out to you
I understand
Every single thing she said is 100% accurate. I am a suicide survivor, and a person who has lost 2 of the most beloved people in my life to suicide. This woman is telling everyone EXACTLY what it feels like. God bless her.
I SO AGREE!!!. I too, along with you,... and all of us here. Are on this horrifying, unbearable nose dive. 🙏for YOU , and all of us. May we heal ASAP
!!!🎉
that first moment is what suicidal people feel like all the time.
Yes!
amen...
chavruta2. amen.
chavruta2000 I'm a 3 time suicider. I've never wanted to be here. Since I was a tiny little girl I can remember not wanting to be here. I was deeply sad to the very pit of my Soul for no reason. I'm 50+, at least now I have a plethora of reasons for the sadness. All the meds in the World do not cover what we feel 24/7.
After seeing what a suicide does to a family, I would never do it. A lot of people I have met have said the same.
"I knew that the rational part of me had to recognize that the guilt was irrational." Amazingly said. Thank you for this.
hope your ok have a good day dear keep your head up your strong
Seven months in and I relate to every single word she says. The guilt eats you alive but I know it’s not my fault. I tell myself that every day. My husband was terribly depressed and not in his right mind, The unanswered questions, the uncontrollable grief, but I’m still here and I’m still alive. I will march on for myself and my kids. I loved him
enough to not want him to suffer, he was not selfish, in fact I think he was incredibly brave to do what he did but oh my God I miss him and I wish more than anything in the world that this terrible deadly illness hadn’t got hold of him.
Lily 11 I can completely relate. I lost my husband a little over a month ago to depression as well. It has been a constant battle everyday to stay strong for my two children.
you have a beautiful soul
Going forward is so very important. I was not hit with ongoing guilt, yes I had it, some how I was able to let it go. Reminds me of all those that said they understood, or call if you need anything. Unless you’ve been down this highway there is no way “you understand”.
I was lucky to have an incredible support system. God be with you.
@@gabbyvargas88 my 71 year old brother lives with me i'm 70 i don't think i would be here if he didn't, i also live for my 2 beautiful cats!
@@gabbyvargas88 LOVE is the greatest power, its the love from my brother that keeps me alive along with my 2 beautiful cats! Stay strong its really hard Bless you!
I lost my brother 4 days ago to suicide. Thank you for sharing this. I needed to hear this.
Sorry about your loss, please, reach out for support you are not alone. I lost my dad, and there is help to help you survive. Reach out.
Sending love and light your way xxxx
hugs love
Sorry for your loss, we lost our son 04/13/22 to suicide due to depression and addictions. He is in a better place as much as we would want him here with us.
I lost my brother to suicide 12 days ago, and I'm struggling hard core with the depression part. But we all have to keep going forward
I'll pray for you and your brother
keep going your a beautiful soul
Are you okay?
Leelasmommy3299 I hope you’re coping as best as you can.
Sorry I know that doesn't fix it ☹️
The last breath one takes before they take or try to take their own life is one cold, lifeless breath. In your mind and your heart, the world is over, and you finally have control of what happens to you. It's not that nobody in their right mind commits suicide, cause if you are still capable to think with reason, you still will have some hope. The last moments before one takes their life are full of nothingness, nothing makes any sense to you at that time. The family members or friends that love you feel that you betrayed them, but what you feel is that they're better off without you, that you are a burden for them, that you are a burden for the world, that even you are better off without yourself. Suicide isn't an act of cowardice either, cause when you reach that far down the spiral of life, there is no courage left and there is no fear, it's just an endless void. Your soul dies inside you before you take your own life physically. And even if you don't succeed at it, you're never fully alive ever again. I've been there.
+Andy Xypher your comment made me cry, it's exactly how i feel...i really wanna die and it's gonna happen soon hopefully
@ Andy Xypher I love that some people get it, in addition you put it so eloquently, cheers Andy, hoping you are still among us, or maybe that is selfish, maybe you deserve more, whatever that is !
Andy Xypher some of them do it because they are simply done with life and people around them. sometimes suicide is an act of love towards oneself. they wanted to stop the pain and suicide is their only way out. I know that because I think of it everyday and it's only a matter of time before I have the courage to do it.
I'm with you on that...it sure sucks feeling this way EVERY damn day
I get up , although I don't know why really, every work day and go do my thing. From the outside? I look " okay" . Inside? I'm like, what the hell is the point of even doing any of this when it's entirely pointless to begin with? At which point , I set down what I have going on and wander off and that same fucking cycle of thought begins to come *screaming* back at me . My hands and fingers might be busy,? But my head is just on over drive and there's no "off" switch to engage. My sleep pattern is so seriously screwed up it's a literal wonder I can drive the short distance and not hit something . And you are right Franco, it's *every damn day*.
I love how plainly and honestly she speaks about suicide. She is a huge inspiration to those who are in danger of committing themselves. It takes tremendous strength to carry on living despite the depression and guilt.
Nice profile pic ;)
I lost my son to suicide 7 yrs ago. I still feel like I could’ve done something. I don’t believe this feeling will ever go away. 💙
Sending good positive energy from my heart to yours.
Bless you and be here tomorrow.
If you'd like places for info please reply as such.
Most of all...🕊
I'm so very sorry for your loss. Please don't blame yourself. We often miss the signs.
At least you cared.
It has been said, "Suicide is an attack on the living." In reality, sometimes suffering is just unbearable.
I like her.
The way she presented this issue, her personal take on everything and her coping strategies. She seems very intelligent, caring and loving.
to anyone who has gotten themself out of a dark place mentally, just know, you're really strong for doing that. I've been there, and it took me years to get out of it. finding the right people is hard, and if you find the wrong person, it might shove you down even harder. it might change your life for the worse. but if you got passed it before, just know I'm really proud of you, and that I'm cheering behind you on the internet.
I've lost my husband to suicide three months ago. It's a long way to go through my grieving but I know I will live and that it wasn't my fault
I lost my boyfriend February 26th 2024 he took his life infront of me. Hugs to you
@@MissyLintI lost my wife to suicide while I was in the next room. Three weeks ago going on four. I don't know what to do it's like my universe imploded.
Hi I lost my husband 2 months back. All my friends and his are reassuring me that it wasn't my fault. I also feel it wasn't my fault. But the guilt comes back again and again. How did you help yourself please tell me.
I lived with suicidal ideation for 16 years. I was misdiagnosed 6 years ago with bipolar 2 when I was really BPD (borderline personality disorder). I've had 3 attempts result in hospitalization, last one being a really close call.. well I haven't had an attempt in almost 2 years but I started taking my mental health seriously when I got rediagnosed BPD. I'm now over a year seperated from my ex husband and I've never been happier! I finally am moving forward with alot of hope for the future. It's a long journey but it's possible to work towards a fulfilling life
Happy for you! :)
So i was sitting here 9 and a half years after my partner's suicide still stuck in a rut and your video is THE FIRST in all those years that accurately describes exactly what I felt/still feel....the only difference is you were smart...you were so right about fearing to love again, I lost both my parents in the same year I lost my partner. I let the overwhelming grief destroy me. I didn't turn to drugs or alcohol but I avoided anything that might hurt me in life. Waffling here, because I still cry like a baby when I remember and my brain turns to mush. But thank you for putting this into words
Rachel Broadfield May God give you strength.
This woman is a super hero, truly. Finding the formulae to become successful as a person and all that amidst not only the suicides of her loved ones but also the constant idea that you could follow that same path. I cannot see myself ever coming out of the thought “today will be the day I die” that I have in my mind every morning or “i hope I don’t wake up another morning” each night before I fall asleep without even realizing.
I am so sorry for all of the pain so many of you have expressed here. I wish such stories of suicide loss and grief were rare. I wish that all of you who find life so difficult, and who fight back the urge to end it with astonishing strength, didn't have to face such struggles each day, each hour, each minute. May the next day, hour, minute be easier on you; may your burdens be lighter. Bless all of you in your journey. Bless everyone here in this comments section and elsewhere on this Earth, everyone who aches with the pain of living and reaches for hope despite everything. May you all find joy around the bend. May we all remember to carry each other. Take care, and know that you're not alone.
So very sorry for every single one of our losses ! Reading comments just bawling - my husband took his life and I witnessed this horror . He was a very good person - I did not see it coming ,. He was very much loved - there is so very much to this story ! So without praying and God - I would be gone or very much insane . I am a bit crazy with ptsd - and sorrow - now turned to deep depression - but I'm still here . I wish I could hug each one of you - that are sad , have known great loss - and say something that would help , I am thankful for this video its important her message - I will be praying for us all. God bless you - each one
Thank you SO much for doing this talk, my daughter took her own life on September 5, 2019, and I have been so lost. I like your practical solutions to moving forward with those you love that are here still with you. I like the list. Thank you, Amy.
So sorry to your loss. My daughter best friend from college just committed suicide. It is unbearable. I can feel the pain and hope you recover and resume.
@@danielleli1456 My prayers are with you daughter and may her best friend rest in peace 🙏🏾❤️
I am so sorry for your loss Christina, May your daughter rest in peace 🙏🏾❤️
Fraser, my son took his life 26/7/21 , 20 year old beautiful person. I listen to people who have suffered through friends family who leave us via sucicide. I havnt had a single night sober since he left us, I work every day, I put on a show every day, I try not to be bitter or angry but I honestly believe I'm now in auto mode, I don't know what keeps me getting out of bed everyday, I think mainly because Fraser would want me too.... We all grieve differently, we need to find what fits and works for us or we won't be able to move forward, hopefully one day I will find someone or something that fits xxxx
Lost my son to suicide 5 years ago. I consider myself a veteran. I didn't want to, think I would, ever imagine, fathom I would walk this road of life but here I am. And I am still alive.
My mother commited suicide. I promise myself not to be like her and be strong but I lost my almost 9yr old baby last October. 11 days before his birthday. I will continue to live this life until we meet on the other side. I find comfort in our creator and mama Mary 🙏🏻
Your mam was strong. I assume.she was fighting a long time.with deseases like depression. Therfore you have to be brave everyday and committing suicide is an act wich needs incredible strength to do.
I was 9 when my sister killed herself. I’m now 15. There isn’t a day that goes by where something doesn’t remind me of her. I miss her dearly. I do wish she were around to watch me grow and be here to support me. Some days I blame her for hurting me in this way. Some days I blame myself for putting her in so much stress. Some days I blame god too. I blame my parents. I blamed everyone. I regret so much. I regret not bonding with her. I regret it all.
Sometimes nothing is simple but the feeling of pain. Strength and love to all!
keep your head up keep pushing foward i truly beleive our souls go way farther than here on earth i really do ....try not to hold blame or guilt when we get to this point its harder to be here than not to....but just know our souls go way beyond this earth dear .....try not to blame god......he is a loving god dear ...... he didnt do this to hurt you or let it happen to hurt you i promise you that ......he has somewhere so much more beautiful than this place here for us.......put comfort in your soul doll or try to
It's normal, my daughter 13years old did it 2months ago, and the guilt and regrets are so much 😢.
@@betox271 I’m so sorry for your loss
My son lost his brother at 9 also he is also 15. This has been the hardest 3 yrs of our lives. So sorry for your loss
It's devastating reading all these comments about people who lost loved ones to suicide. My goodness. I am so sorry. It is NOT your fault. I tried to commit suicide 7 times last year. Simply because my demons were/are overwhelming. It is not anyone's fault. God bless you all.
God bless you, too, Baltzer. I'm glad you're here.
✨️🎉❤
I hope you are well.
I heard the first shot and didn't know what it was, I rushed to the bathroom and saw him sitting with the gun, recocking it and I still couldn't understand what was happening. My brain just turned off. All I could say was, "What are you doing?" As I watched him blow his head off. The remorse I feel, I spread over our entire culture. We are all responsible for every suicide because we are continuing to accept a culture that values wealth and success over love and kindness. We have lost touch with what it means to be human, and that is the most difficult realization for me to bear, even more than my grief.
Boom excellently said. The DSM diagnose based on your ability or inability to produce so depressing and no one takes this serious cause they can't see the bruises
🙏that experience was so horribly unbearable.... pray for you & your family 🫶
I'm unfortunate to be experiencing this mental nightmare. I hope I can continue to keep fighting this 🙏
I'm sorry for your lost loved ones. I needed to hear this. EVERY day I talk myself out of not killing myself but killing the pain grief and regret that screams at me all day long. Your sister and husband aren't having anymore stress. They don't have the walls screaming at them anymore. Please try and be happy for them. They were hurting.
i talk myself out of killing myself also my brothers LOVE keeps me here along with my 2 beautiful cats!
My husband hung himself 21 years ago. 4 days before our daughter’s 12th birthday. I’m still here. She’s still here.
I know your pain. You are not alone. My wife killed herself 03/112002. I'm still here...
❤️
wow!!!!! im here i hope you have some kind of comfort and understanding.....you guys are so strong dont forget that
@@Lougallops i also lost a husband to this. Could you please tell me if survival gets better with time?
Also a lot of strength to you and your daughter. 🙏🏻
After so many years, this is the most powerful speech on how to survive suicide loss ❤ thanks for give us strength x
I'm still alive - my beloved son took his life 4 years ago. Thank you for your story
praying for comfort and understanding for you and hope that there is a better place that our souls go to
He's at peace. Stay strong.
So sorry you had to go through this and thankyou for sharing your experiences and copimg mechanisms. After losing my partner to suicide and then my son hung himself in woodland aged 17 I find this Ted talk so relatable. Grief is not orderly, it's a rollercoaster. Hearing a teenager laughing on the bus last week turned my whole day upside down. Doctors put me on all sorts of meds which just suppressed the necessary emotional and cognitive processes of grieving. I still hardly leave the house. I came off meds cold turkey which my doctor recorded in my notes as 'refusing treatment' I did exactly the same as you..I needed something to replace the dark and negative thoughts in my head so I signed up for an access course with the Open University which was amazing kind of therapy for me. Work is all online so no pressure to leave the house for classes. I'm now in the last year of a history degree. It's given my brain something other to chew on besides the emptiness I feel. It's never goes away..you might think it's easing then you hear a kid laugh on a bus and it sets off a thousand memories, all memories lead to the morning the police knocked on my door and asked if I had a son and that he had "self harmed and is now deceased"....I still hear that sentence in my head, everyday at some point.
Stay strong and pray
Theres always hope
I lost my husband to suicide just this past Thanksgiving Day. I have no words to anyone who has been affected by suicide. I wish I had words but its just too soon because I am struggling with trauma, survivors guilt and incredible sorrow. If you are suicidal please please please dont think you are a burden to others because you aren't, you aren't. You are loved.
Hi baby Am Ben easygoing person I like good and do good I like friends that have understanding and fun to be with I love arts, museum and music l lunch luxury every Eve I compose poem and scripts am a civil engineer and a contractor I work for company and I work in Asia,africa,and Europe I need a woman who understands What love is all about, to be my own I saw your picture and I am impressed you're beautiful and baby you shines like a diamond springs In Sky nicely like flowers in the garden of Eden's I close my eyes all I is you at first sight I felt the energy of Sun rays angel'wings written love on it I love you so much baby I want a wonderful woman will love me and know who I am and be mine forever i hope You will reply soonest thanks
I found this video very helpful. It describes exactly how I felt and am still feeling about my fiancé's suicide 6 months ago. It's unbearable grief, sadness, and the GUILT is the worst feeling of all.
3 years later, how are you doing?
Hi baby Am Ben easygoing person I like good and do good I like friends that have understanding and fun to be with I love arts, museum and music l lunch luxury every Eve I compose poem and scripts am a civil engineer and a contractor I work for company and I work in Asia,africa,and Europe I need a woman who understands What love is all about, to be my own I saw your picture and I am impressed you're beautiful and baby you shines like a diamond springs In Sky nicely like flowers in the garden of Eden's I close my eyes all I is you at first sight I felt the energy of Sun rays angel'wings written love on it I love you so much baby I want a wonderful woman will love me and know who I am and be mine forever i hope You will reply soonest thanks
I love the authenticity of your presentation and the emotions/growth that you've shared that can touch so many... thank you!
Mercy. I lost Paul last year in March, 2022. Natural death. Grief is just so awful. Everyday is just grief. I’m Catholic. I pray. Grateful for Paul. Just alone.
Thank you for this speech. I need it. I am a good mother, a loving wife, and maybe a good siblings. My family is beautiful. But inside I feel so weak and empty. The only reason that I'm here is I am afraid to hurt my love ones.
How is this lady so emotionally strong? I don’t think I could have dealt with this.
No easy answers , I think listening to her story is a beautiful thing.
I lost my wife to suicide recently. She was sufferring from depression for a long time. I thought I had it under control but completely underestimated. The pain of losing her will never go away. On top of that, I will carry the guilt of letting her down till I breathe. I pray God that no one else should undergo the sufferings of losing their loved one (esp. to suicide).
Thank you for this, I needed it. My mother attempted suicide a few times, her father had also died by suicide. Then my cousin hung himself in 2015. Two years later my husband jumped off a bridge onto the turnpike. Then my other cousin also hung herself. Then in 2020 my boyfriend shot himself in front of me. A few months later my cousin's daughter also hung herself, she was 14. It's so hard to keep going after all of this. But everything you said really helped me put a new perspective on things, thank you.
Thats insane it seems zhat depression and suicide can have something to do with genes.
My son Steve died by suicide April 23,2015
That's the day my hole world fell apart....he was amazing....I haven't laughed in 3 years.i feel so guilty for not seeing it.
I'm so sorry 💔
hope somehow you find comfort and understanding your strong dont forget it
Sometimes the guilt can be motivating, inspiring.
When I was in 8th grade a girl I had never spoken to but noticed All The Time... killed herself. Our only interaction was her smiling at me in the hallway.
The guilt I felt was immense, and continues to be.
She was friends with so many of my friends, why didn't I talk to her?
After all, I was suicidal too, maybe we could have helped each other.
She did help me though, because of her I found I could not kill myself even though I desperately wanted to and sometimes still found myself pacing around that bridge.
And because of her I take the topic Very seriously.
I am always there to listen whenever anyone needs me because I am so afraid of losing someone i love that way.
I actually met my current girlfriend who I can see myself marrying all because of that girl.
Because my girlfriend, before we met, posted a suicide note on her blog.
I prayed and prayed that she had not succeeded. She hadn't, thank god.
She was planning on attempting again though, so since we lived in the same town coincidentally I said that we should meet in person before she died.
Even if I was going to lose her anyway, I wanted the opportunity to meet her, to hear her voice, to have a chance to maybe encourage her to live.
That's exactly what happened. I loved her almost immediately, so I asked her to be mine after only hanging out a few times. It's now been 2 years together.
Last year in May though, she attempted suicide again. A much more serious attempt, an attempt that really almost took her life.
But I saved her. After not hearing from her for a day I took the 1.5 hour bus ride to her house and was able to confirm her attempt and get her dad and an ambulance.
We're ironically quite lucky she overdosed though, because otherwise I wouldn't have had the time to get her. And at that time, I didn't have her father's phone number.
Since she got out of the hospital I have lived with her in her dad's house.
We support eachother and get eachother through the hard times.
I've had to accept that I may still lose her to suicide, but because of the guilt I feel about that girl we lost nearly 10 years ago now, I was ever able to know her.
Why r u condemning yourself to a lifetime of pain with this girl all bcos of a past guilt? Seek help u seriously need it.
You are amazing. I am so proud of you. Thank you for being here.
@@frashiahwangari2177 It may be that some of us can stand the pain and some of us cannot. Some of us can even help bear the pain of another while bearing our own all the while. Love is the opposite of apathy. Some times we love and some times we're apathetic, it depends on our season.
My daughter was 18 when she took her life less than a year ago. Im a wreck, and this is the first video I allowed myself to listen to. I haven't had any counseling and im hanging with a tough crowd. I was couch surfing when it occurred so my balance was already lost and now I have to smoke a lot of weed to even talk. I cry ALL the time. And I am awarw that I have to afford spend the rest of my life with this truth. I am a reason for it all. Not the only reason but part. When she was little I was on drugs and figured she was safe with my mom and she was, but my actions created a hole in her soul. She yearned for A mom and dad and she spent many nights not knowing where I was. I was so caught up in my stupid bullshit I had no idea what I was doing to her mentality. We went to many counseling appointments and I was always understanding . Then after six Years clean I started using and she was unhappy with me when she decided never to see anyone again. It is so hard to see a future and im terrified of death. And the pain hasn't lighten up at all. Ten months later and I still catch my breath in disbelief that my babygirl is dead. And im so freakin lost
Nikki Gonzales i dont like my parents and they lived with me. i also wanted to kill myself when i was younger. i think its logical though. theres not actually a point to doin any of this shit. i think suicidal people are in fact thinkin more clearly then the people that stay busy and act like theres a point to workin so hard to aquire stuff. theres no point
I hear you loud and clear. I am a single mom and have mental health issues. When my mom passed from cancer my son was 2 and 1/2 years old. Because I was adopted the connection to my mom, though we fought a lot and I was a rotten teenager, the fact was, she was the only thing I really had. When she died, I died. I still did what I had to for my son but I was emotionally absent. He is now a teen himself and sadly he is lost. He parties on the weekends, only weed and alcohol, but he suffers from anxiety, he has OCD issues and EDD - emotional dysregulation, in other words when things go wrong he will rage in an instant, say things he may not mean, apologize later. By being empty at a crucial time in his life I blame myself for his pain, his choices, his troubles. Am I alive today, even knowing that I messed up his life? NO.
So, as I said before, I hear you and to be honest am scared to death that one day I could be sharing what you have shared here with us.
I am so very sorry for your loss, for the guilt you feel, that you have to numb it with drugs. I do the same with prescribed medication. My response to you may sound selfish because I am still unable to change, especially for my son, but each day I ...
I don't know. I just pray that God will take pity on my child and give him what I can't.
I am commenting 11 months after your share, I hope you have had the chance to heal just a bit. I would never presume that you should be okay today, mourning and grief are different for all of us.
Be as well as you can.
Alyssa
What I would say to you above (and to others), is get some counseling and do therapy. It helped me. I lost my father few years back, and it was a TREMENDOUS SETBACK in my life. I seemed to spiral downward, but I found a therapist and she helped me gain more perspective on it. So, don't just sit in your grief and/or your own pity / remorse / your own thoughts ... Get out of the house, find a therapist, and start making progress on working through the emotions. Don't just pray or, I say, PRAY IT AWAY. Actually, take action, and it will help you get stronger and really be the person that you can be.
If you read the other posts of loved ones who commit suicide, they were successful well adjusted people without the problems you say your daughter had. It's not you it was inside her mind. That's the truth.
Nikki Gonzales get up .... get busy .... pray .... fight ... do whatever it takes to help your heart to heal .
This woman is SO STRONG!!!!!
i think saying a little prayer from to bottom of your heart is the best treatment in dealing with harsh moments in your life. these are my thoughts about it.
You’re still here
take it as it comes
dont try to exit . dont have to end it
take the pain, let it stay in you as long as it wants.
FEAR NOT
as you suffer, you should know it is harmless.
all the guilt, pain will strengthen you. purifies you.
if you are empty , no one can robb you
if you are dead already, no one can take your life.
just be who you are as you are.
embrace your self and go your own way
with a good friend named humility.
My husband of 30yrs left earth 29/4/19... demons of depression got to strong for him ... 😪
So sorry for your loss-sending you hugs. Unfortunately I know your pain x
I’m sorry
Im sorry
sorry i cant imagine i hope you get comfort just keep your head up you have a beautiful soul
🌟Thanxs heaps for ur kind words the support gives me strength... live one day at a time as best as I can ... our awesome sons make the world a better place.... blessings of health safety happiness harmony to all..
🤗💌🥰💝🐻💕😇💖🙏🦋
My beloved brother committed suicide in February, we are still sometimes in the snot stage. I still feel guilt like if I'd only known I could have (insert action). The edges of the pain are becoming less sharp but the unanswered questions keep nagging. Thankyou for your very frank approach to a very difficult subject. God bless you.
This video has 62 dislikes and that makes no sense to me. Amy is the most self-reflecting and intellectual person I've heard deliver their thoughts in the clearest and understandable way possible. Maybe I'm partial to her just because I can identify with her in more aspects than not, but none the less this is something people should know. Because whether or not you've had to deal with suicide, it is great know these tools and perspectives to be more ready for it than knowing nothing at all. I came here because I only heard a few sentences in the song "Fragile - I want to be cold" and had to know more. Thank you for publishing this video, giving her time on your show and thank you to the artist who put her message in your song. If you read this, know you have made at least one person become a little stronger.
I have my own experience in terms of loosing my girlfriend & getting the suicide attempts wrong. I'll spare the details. Once you've done the devilish deed, its that aftermath of those raw emotions, which hurts so much, by those left to pick up their lives, if they can.
Well the dislikes are from ppl that don't understand how bad the person felt when they did what they did. You just need to try and put yourself in their shoes and that was the only thing they thought they could do whether they regret it is something we will never know but I can bet that they probably so but it is too late now and at the time it was what they needed to do
This lady's beautiful speech helped me so much it helps to know that your not going through it alone
Thankyou, this was so healing and helpful to those who go through this, including myself. I pray this woman who has lived through so much loss can feel love again and trust it enough to be authentic to herself. Her words have touched my broken heart as well. 💜
What a wonderful person.
She didn't have to share her story, but she did.
My Mother was a suicide on Jan 8, 1983. I have always felt that I could have stopped it. I was out having fun and eating. I have been over eating since, every day. That makes me feel guilt even more. I was so mad at her in the beginning. I truly don't ever believe I will ever not feel guilt. Sep 2018
I hope you come to the place where you stop punishing yourself for your mother's choice to end her life. There is no way you could have prevented it anymore than I could have stopped my cousin hanging himself or my lovely best friend jumping from a 4 storey car park leaving 5 children motherless who had recently become fatherless. I had to get to the place where I let them go, respecting their freedom to choose their manner of death whilst deciding to embrace my choice to live well. X
maggie reeves
Short of a 24 hour suicide watch, it would be impossible to guarantee preventing somebody else’s choice to do themselves in.
Just realizing how many people suffer through stuff like this and it truly breaks my heart😭
What a strong, witty, articulate and wonderful woman! I wish she was my friend 🌸
Ever since I was born all that I want is to die…….I had a bipolar disorder, I was depressed, I was addicted to drugs, and I felt empty. but at the age of 18, I met Jesus and He saved my life. He took away my bipolar, my depression, my addictions, and my suicidal thoughts. and I trully believe that He can do the same for you if you come to Him. God loves you..….more than you could ever imagine. I pray that every one of you will always find happiness and love in your life.
God bless.
Yes, Jesus is the only answer, there is no other.
Thank you so much for sharing ❤
I've lost 3 people to suicide. It hurts. But the thing I want to say is that as I read these comments I feel for each and everyone of you and hope that you can find relief and healing as each keep going forward.
I am sorry for your loss Ruth, my prayers are with, stay strong darling 🙏🏾❤️
@@Blessedron1 much love back at you🙏
well she's amazing
My ex-partner and close friend committed suicide 6 days ago. He jumped under a train. I used to be his caretaker before I left him.
I feel guilty and so, so sad. I miss him.
Rest in peace, M. 🤍 I'm sorry I failed you.
I am going through something very similar. The guilt I feel from leaving him and not being there eats me alive everyday. Knowing the pain I am so sorry that you feel this way. I hope this podcast helps you heal ❤️
Thank you for sharing THIS!!
This is EVERYTHING I needed to hear.
People who try to suicide do not want to end their lives. Instead they want to end the unbearable pain inside the brain.
I believe people want to suicide not because they are not loved, but because they stop being able to love themselves and do not believe anyone can love who they really are behind all those mask they wear to hide who they really are. They do that because they don't believe anyone can love them 'as they really are'. it is a self prophecy of 'i'm not enough...' Most of the time, no one around them is to blame. They often blame themselves for not being 'loveable' because they cannot see how they can be 'loved'. It is often a false impression in their mind that others are way better at everything than they are, and so, feel like they are mostly worthless...
the truth is, we are all worthy. Unless you have killed someone willingly, i think everyone is worthy. But life is often projecting a false idea of reality. Social pressure is terrible. And some people are more susceptible to the influence of the outside world than others. Self destructive behaviors are a plenty, from suicide to taking drugs, alcoolism, eating disorders, etc... Suicide is a way of communicating pain, like all those ailments are. Lack of love for oneself can be as destructive as lack of love from others...if not more so.
I couldn't agree more on that.
There are many reasons for suicide. People commit suicide because they are in physical or emotional pain, or both. There is a point where the pain is too much. They’ve been through too much, and know there is more pain on the way.
Many people aren't loved.
I too have suffered the crippling alcoolism. Sorry, humor is my shield from all that we're discussing here. What you said, couldn't have been put better.
My self hatred seems to outweigh the immense love I receive from my family and friends most times.
Thank you so much. You made me believe i am normal. All these people around me think im crazy but thank you for telling me im not.
I passed through a long period of low grade depression, which never spireled into fully fledged clinical depression. But it was enough to allow me to understand that I wouldn't have wanted to experience more than I did and in addition it was enough to allow me to know that saying ''Just do this or that'' is not helpful. My heart goes out to all experiencing depression. I wish I had the secret to just make it go away for everyone as I wish I had had the secret to make it go away for a family member who took his life 9 years ago.
I have struggled with suicidal thoughts for a few years and it is agonising. But after losing my best friend 3 months ago, I can tell you that that is absolutely the worst thing that has ever happened to me. I have been through abuse and severe mental anguish before, but losing him truly killed me.
Love your most compelling talks on Suicide. Amy Biancolli . Sometimes , people engulfed in guilt are looking for answers to cope and deal with their loved one in suicide tragedy. Your talks have surely gave me insights, wisdom and courage to help others affected. Life goes on but no need to feel guilty because it will affect people and that can take them in a downward spiral. I believe in prayers and praying for the people committed suicide can release burdens of guilt .I love it when you said something about mystery and that aspects of ourselves know no answers but to assume. My heartfelt empathise to all who are affected by loved ones in suicide tragedy and to the victims themselves. Only God knows..
I still have that guilt after 20 years... never will go away
Thank you. Beautifully raw & real. I am so sorry for your losses. Your pain must be so great. I know you have helped some rethink this move & saved many more from pain that you so generously shared with us with this talk. God bless you & yours.
I lost my mother to suicide. I can tell you one thing for sure: yes, it is other people’s fault. Yes, something could have been done. Yes, guilt and shame must be applied to all relatives, friends, doctors, and employers of the deceased person, because even the littlest act of kindness can save someone’s life. We fail and kill the most vulnerable, the most sensitive, the kindest people and accepting the responsibility for our actions however difficult it is is a must. So thank you for the talk, but every victim of suicide with the exception of criminals is our fault and responsibility.
This is the best and only TEDxTalk about suicide that truly resonated with me. My military veteran husband took his life due to PTSD-induced depression 3 weeks ago. Your 'list' of feelings immediately after your husband took his life is exactly what I'm going through. I, like you, also have 3 teenage children. Many similarities btwn us, which may be why your story/words resonate so much for me. Thank you for sharing your story 🤍🤍
It's been 6 months since my comment above, and I just wanted to share that I have come back to your talk over these months. Still struggling HARD with the guilt, but still putting one foot in front of the other and moving (very slowly) forward. Thank you again for your talk 💞💔
@@k8tina I'm just seeing your comments now. I'm so, so profoundly sorry we have such a devastating loss in common, but I'm grateful you found some help in my story. Bless you and your kids as you continue to move forward through the tangles of grief & guilt. ❤
Thank you, Amy....you gave me a lot to think about. But most of all, you have empowered me.
thank you Amy for this TED talk this has helped me beyond any expectation your words and your truth has made a massive impact on my own loss and I am just so grateful for your word.
wow. she's been through a lot. i get the guilt part. i think its human nature. deciding to be of help to others helped me let go of "my" pain. loving others is very theraputic.
Your talk is so real and so raw and so relatable and I've not lost anyone but I feel like I lose myself sometimes...so thank you for not giving us a presentation but a conversation...that's what this is!
I lost my son to suicide 3 months ago, I related to all the guilt you describe and I am grateful for all the support I received through this crisis and cognitively I understand I need to move forward with my own life but I don’t know if the emptiness and sadness will ever leave, probably not. Thank you for your speak it was helpful to know I am not alone in my grief.
I lost my little brother, 18 years old, to it too on September 25th, it’s been hard watching my parents go through this let alone going through it myself, I wish you luck, tell your boys story, I need to tell my brothers
@@jjut6182 Thank you for caring, this is very difficult for families, blessing to yours. It has been 6 months now for our family we are living with our grief
@@channelseeker7 thank you much, we all can’t believe we’re coming up on one month next week, we don’t know how we’re doing it but we are. Good luck to you and your family
You are a beautiful soul and a very courageous person! I hope you learn that jazz violin! Thank you for your inspiring words. ♥️🙏
You are spot on. I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
I'm chronically ill/disabled and have sever panic attacks and depression. Also chronic pain. I am physicaly and mentally Ill. I am so lucky to have A supportive family. When my parents and grandma pass I don't know what I can do. I survived two attempts.
I am so sorry for the loss of the speaker. I couldn't imagine.
❤
I am standing up straight with you !
I have watched, read and heard almost everything about suicide on the internet after my husband took his own life. This video has been my strength. I hope to carry the power that this woman carries inspite god putting her on test again and again.
Thank you, Amy...for sharing your story. You are an inspiration.
Thank you for sharing. Such tragedies in your life! Your list is so healing God bless you and your family! Sending you love and prayers!
Thank you. Reinvention is key. I've seen personal tragedy turn people into basket cases and I've seen this also magically propel them to great height.
I was about to end my life You saved me
I'm glad you're here. Hang in there. Life is so short no matter how long suffering seems.
❤
Hang in there baby we are all behind you .God ,the universe ,and souls that are here struggling too
❤️❤️❤️ praying you are well a year later
Brian, I'm glad you're still here, I hope you're making progress, and finding your way.
I attempted suicide in 2017 I remember I passed out but while unconscious I heard the Lord say it wasn't time praise God I'm still here!!!!!!
We’re you a Christian before that
No
I think it's important to recognize that this is equally valid for the family members of those who attempted suicide and were unsuccessful. This is a great talk, and I really appreciate that it's shared here. To all those in the comments section, complaining about another "woe is me" family member talk, I'm glad you don't understand. I pray you never have to. To those trying to assess the mental state of those who commit suicide, why bother? Does it really matter? These were people, the same as you or I, and now they're dead. Treat them with respect. Don't bother kicking beehives that don't need to be kicked. For all those who have contemplated suicide, I pray for you, and I hope you get the help you need.
It is so sad that anyone is so miserable that they end their one and only life early. I always want to do it but still afraid I won't be successful and end up living through it ultimately making my situation worse than before. I wish it was not so hard, like you could just take one pill and you would just fall asleep permanently.
The only thing left to even feel guilty about is begrudging your loved one's happiness... because you somewhat still feel that it was more important for them to stick around just to make you happier
.. even though that might not have even been possible under the circumstances 🙏❤️ too!
Dear Lieke, thank you for your kindness x
My blessing and prayers for all who have lost loved and dear ones, in the comments below and to Amy here. There is much to share and care about amongst us all and a good starting place is genuinely showing patience and compassion as that makes space and brings in much-needed security to catch up and deal with the horrors of life. Please, stay gentle and kind. Amen.
Thank you so much for your speech. I lost my mother suddenly , 1 yr before your sister died. My mom had a heart attack. Here on Friday, dead Sunday night. This past May, she would've celebrated her 99th birthday. Had both she and my dad were still alive, they would've celebrated their 78th wedding anniversary. He would've been 103. I spent so man years with my grief, anger and sadness, it manifested itself into depression, anxiety and there are moments where I'm in my dark space. I had 2 strokes 8 yrs apart, and everyday is a struggle for me. Yet I press on. What else am I to do right? I don't think we ever "get" over it. We learn to deal with it and continue to go on with our lives. We tell ourselves, this is their wish for us. Yes, I'm in therapy, and it helps somewhat. And yes, some days are harder to get outta bed than others, but we do it. Again, thank you for your words of comfort, and wisdom. And you are so right. If we made the rules, we could've changed history. Spared ourselves so much grief, and be the people we were before all this happened. God bless.
my life is agony, depression and now mental illness.
Mine too. HOw people enjoy eveyrthing ...
Me too as well!
You can get thru it. Please try. ❤️❤️
Healing is a process. I have found Yoga and Meditation to be very healing.
Then make make your own decision on what is best for you. Don't listen to others who promise "you can get through it". They say that because first they are not suffering themselves at the moment and they don't know that you can get through it without the loss of everything that makes you human and life worth anything. And the other reason is that THEY have severe Death anxiety and are unconsciously terrified of any reminders of their own death. (Read Ernest Becker's book. Denial of Death.)
I lost my baby daddy/ fiancé to suicide a year and half ago… he hung himself in front of me and I’ll never know why he did that… I’m a strong woman for still being here and witnessing that…. But dealing with my grief I had turned to drugs and sleeping around… just to get that feeling again.. but January 26th,2022 I had a overdose at my job and I’m glad I’m here I haven’t done any of those drugs again since that had happened to me that opened my eyes.. I’m meant to be here …. I just miss him so much and I wish he didn’t do that to me or our daughter….
I wish you luck on your journey, I lost my baby brother to suicide on September 25th, we were all home, he walked out into the driveway and used a rifle, we all have to believe that he didn’t do it to hurt any of us but he did it to save himself, from what we may never know but I believe it’s from the world. I wish no one ever had to experience stuff like you, or me.
Please stay away from drugs, they will always win. Sleeping around is also very damaging. Wishing you all the best ❤
@@user-wb2yv7ll9d I’ve actually stopped and decided to try another relationship. I’m still coping but I’m better now …
This was super helpful because I’m going through this right now my brother committed suicide yesterday so this is all very fresh in the moments that she talked about I’m going through all of those right now and I’m just grateful that there’s hope