Gabor Mate's short-lecture about 'being self-disconnect'

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  • Опубликовано: 18 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 152

  • @barbaramckay1307
    @barbaramckay1307 5 лет назад +207

    🐄🐹I am 84 and at cross roads of my life . Wish,I found this mans talks before ,but better now than .not at all

    • @smokeylebear1062
      @smokeylebear1062 5 лет назад +2

      Barbara Mckay interestingly enough Dr Maté is around your age

    • @maeve3386
      @maeve3386 4 года назад +4

      Well, enjoy him now babs ...❤ best wishes to you 👌

    • @Alex-mw9nr
      @Alex-mw9nr 4 года назад +1

      Bless you

    • @joanlally9757
      @joanlally9757 4 года назад +1

      Kudos to you💓

    • @becky7468
      @becky7468 4 года назад +2

      I am happy you have it now. I'm sorry you did not have it earlier. Hugs

  • @zabelicious
    @zabelicious 7 лет назад +103

    Dissociation (self-disconnect) is a normal self-protective mechanism when one is not ready to process the traumatic events.

  • @denise2169
    @denise2169 3 года назад +10

    I am learning from Maté to reconnect and to thereby LOVE all of the pain that I experienced as a child, not to blame anyone, but to honour the parts of me that were repressed and split off when I was young and when no one was there for me. I am leaning to love and accept all these parts of myself, as I wished my parents had done for me. I am 69 and am finally beginning to really live. Thank you, Dr Maté!

  • @samiullah579
    @samiullah579 7 лет назад +101

    these words are like a cold breeze for one who's living in very hot home.

    • @laurentiuzloteanu7352
      @laurentiuzloteanu7352  7 лет назад +2

      feel free to enjoy it every time. ruclips.net/video/LmzUZTKuorQ/видео.html

  • @DH-og5yr
    @DH-og5yr 4 года назад +79

    I love how Jordan Peterson got me through tough times and now this guys getting me through tough times with a nearly opposite message

    • @LaZanyarr
      @LaZanyarr 4 года назад +3

      What is the opposite message ??

    • @alangodinez5487
      @alangodinez5487 4 года назад +5

      I know, what do you mean? They're not the same but not opposite to me.

    • @sonodiventataunalbero5576
      @sonodiventataunalbero5576 4 года назад +10

      It's the same for me, both of them quite opposite but I got so much from both. JP activates fire and action which is good and Gabor Mate is so soothing

    • @Giatros89
      @Giatros89 3 года назад +11

      Similar journey. For those asking about opposites my understanding is JP says life is suffering but your can have meaning if you take responsibility and face it willingly, Gabor says the suffering is not due to life it's due to your interpretation of what has happened (disconnect from your self leads to different interpretation of events). Reconnecting with the self will enable you to perceive the same events without the suffering.

    • @supradipmuralidharan6923
      @supradipmuralidharan6923 3 года назад +8

      JP is logical while GM is empathetic but both are compassionate. They want people to help themselves 💔.

  • @Hosamo7
    @Hosamo7 2 года назад +2

    This 4 minutes video summarizes tens of books. Thank you Dr. Gabor.

  • @mayagriffiths392
    @mayagriffiths392 3 года назад +6

    This spoke right to my heart and soul. I am battling body dysmorphia, PTSD, anxiety and depression. Thank you Gabor for everything you do.

  • @vaishalivaidya7978
    @vaishalivaidya7978 4 года назад +16

    I'm so grateful everytime, I come across anything said by Gabor Mate...Would love to meet him and be blessed by him

  • @calm_compost
    @calm_compost 6 лет назад +69

    I soo respect this guy..... ❤❤

    • @jacobjorgenson9285
      @jacobjorgenson9285 5 лет назад +3

      Charlie Parlie worth reading his book “ In the realm of hungry ghosts”

  • @freekbins1376
    @freekbins1376 3 года назад +5

    This man is truely my guide in understanding my addiction and trauma. Trauma is not what happened to you, it meant it was to painful for me to be me. You are a gift sent from up above, Gabor! He (or she) who saves a life, saves the world!

    • @Banban_tv
      @Banban_tv 2 года назад +1

      Yes indeed I love him and more because he believes in psychedelics that I will be doing in the coming month the toad I'm tired I'm not feeling me

  • @davidcurley7800
    @davidcurley7800 5 лет назад +22

    Nothing but love and respect for Gabor Mate ..a great man :)

  • @barbarabanszczyk359
    @barbarabanszczyk359 4 года назад +9

    the music is just incredible

  • @poet2681
    @poet2681 3 года назад +4

    Wow . Really thankful to have come across this . I resonated deeply with everything Gabor has said . It makes so much sense to me . Thank you.

  • @halwarner3326
    @halwarner3326 7 лет назад +30

    I have to be reminded of this , thank you Dr. MATE

  • @vercingetorixavernian8978
    @vercingetorixavernian8978 3 года назад +1

    Love this little video. The rawness of the thunder and music is just perfect

  • @phyllisdeninger2095
    @phyllisdeninger2095 5 лет назад +21

    We never new ourselves because the trauma started ,right from the womb.

  • @lilisomers2664
    @lilisomers2664 5 лет назад +43

    I hear you, oh how I hear you, then this, alone over New Year, and going deep...
    My life is like poetry these days
    soft reflections
    Autumn leaves dropping
    golden, on a pond
    Slow-moving, deep and secret ponds
    to gaze back into
    The longing, like the passion
    All but gone
    But still, I feel,
    The thrill of leaves, cloth, trailed
    soft across my flesh
    Air, small puffs, fresh breaths
    on a scorching day
    And storms that still, still,
    Take my breath
    Away
    And the taste of strawberries
    Sweet/sharp, exquisite,
    along the edges of my tongue
    The joy in a child’s eyes
    At the sight of mere trashy,
    transient things
    Others hopes and dreams
    In passing
    Holidays
    What are they to me?
    Holy days, and not just because of Christ
    But for their sacred depth, their beauty,
    Sadness, loneliness,
    the barest of memories
    Just dog and me , tripping barefoot down these tree-cloaked gullies
    May this be an equally happy & blessed new year for others, for you too. My love and gratitude for Gabor - I'm 67, still, he is a father to me xx

    • @suwaidafarah7612
      @suwaidafarah7612 5 лет назад

      im

    • @jenniedevereaux2696
      @jenniedevereaux2696 4 года назад

      What a beautiful poem.
      Wonderful. Thank you for sharing and bless you. 🙏😍😘❤️😇

    • @annjenkinson7988
      @annjenkinson7988 3 года назад

      How beautifully shared and expressed 🧡

    • @chilloften
      @chilloften 3 года назад

      I enjoy the poetry, brought tears to my eyes.

    • @nancykg6666
      @nancykg6666 3 года назад

      Lili Somers.. your poetry is as beautiful as you are! Thank you for sharing.. much appreciated!

  • @mariamkinen8036
    @mariamkinen8036 3 года назад +1

    I had ppl who connected with me. They did so in a healthy way. My f was troubled inside his own pain. He didn't love me. He never knew how. That's HIS problem . Amen

  • @doctoranwar3667
    @doctoranwar3667 4 года назад +4

    love dr gambor mate,,i think what he is talking about is very important and needs to be understood...i would love to meet him one day in person

  • @kamilkarnale8764
    @kamilkarnale8764 5 лет назад +6

    I love his lectures. They r so close to realities!👍👍👍

  • @sambodutch5433
    @sambodutch5433 5 лет назад +36

    I wish this guy was my dad.

  • @MsCoppery
    @MsCoppery 4 года назад +3

    This is a game changer . Thankyou

  • @jennytaylor3324
    @jennytaylor3324 4 года назад +2

    Whenever Gabor speaks, I learn something I thought I already knew.
    He's just described me, age 12-15.

  • @curiousgeorge7073
    @curiousgeorge7073 6 лет назад +9

    Beautifully said.

  • @Herkimerdiamond
    @Herkimerdiamond 3 года назад

    This man is so brilliant that I just can but cry

  • @shartbimpson
    @shartbimpson 3 года назад +1

    thank you for making this video, and giving these words the emphasis they deserve

  • @christinaapelgren2129
    @christinaapelgren2129 6 лет назад +12

    I just love to hear those words. ❤🌹❤

  • @katiehewitt1541
    @katiehewitt1541 5 лет назад +3

    I was literally just talking about this omg and it’s so true this is why I believe we need not label why we need to re think and re educate society every time I hear this it’s like yes yes yes all of this true true true

  • @loveishappiness7330
    @loveishappiness7330 5 лет назад +1

    So happy to hear that he has this understanding...Listening to his other videos, where he speaks only of parental influence,I thought he was missing the heart of the matter. When it really is all about alignment with Source within us and the resistance we feel when we are disconnected.
    Abraham Hicks teachings.

    • @loveishappiness7330
      @loveishappiness7330 5 лет назад +2

      I really appreciate this man and his authenticity and wisdom from his own life experience. What a gift he is bringing to many people.

  • @mickadatwist1620
    @mickadatwist1620 5 лет назад +9

    sharp and insightful.

  • @mariosoler5350
    @mariosoler5350 5 лет назад +4

    ..me gustan mucho las formas, maneras & demas de acercarse a la vida, tiene mucho sentido lo ke dice en c/u de sus videos/audios, namaste × siempre a nosotros creaxion divina🙏

  • @LoLelfy
    @LoLelfy 2 года назад

    Beautiful video, thanks for creating

  • @andriyandriychuk
    @andriyandriychuk 4 года назад

    Gabor Mate is a gift

  • @simonskoda1
    @simonskoda1 7 лет назад +7

    This is really great!!!

  • @shaktikumarlyrics
    @shaktikumarlyrics 3 года назад

    Thanks for sharing these insights.

  • @kocerarif
    @kocerarif 6 лет назад +6

    Heartfelt thanks, Laurentiu

  • @samiullah579
    @samiullah579 5 лет назад +4

    After one year I MUST say
    Whoever said these words passed through much more pain.
    And I realized all this worth living a life.

  • @Caperhere
    @Caperhere 5 лет назад +2

    Thank you.

  • @jamesbaron1753
    @jamesbaron1753 4 года назад +2

    Honeslty i wish this guy was my councillor

  • @brettgordhamer6914
    @brettgordhamer6914 7 лет назад +8

    YES!!!!!

  • @angelaeva9365
    @angelaeva9365 7 лет назад +5

    Thank you!!

  • @user-yk9sk7pg6v
    @user-yk9sk7pg6v 5 лет назад +3

    Thank you

  • @motucker44
    @motucker44 6 лет назад +3

    @1:02 there is a trippy bird...really awesome shot

  • @Angellaisab
    @Angellaisab 8 лет назад +7

    thank you!❤

    • @artmanrom
      @artmanrom 7 лет назад

      Angelica Isabella Rodriguez Bolivar :) You are so rich in beautiful names, congratulations Dear Angelica Isabella Rodriguez Bolivar.

  • @charlesdavidson9752
    @charlesdavidson9752 4 года назад

    this is a psychological interpretation of what we have experienced after leaving our proverbial eden which understood enables our journey of reconnection.

  • @ParisTNT
    @ParisTNT 3 года назад

    So eloquent

  • @josefstahlhammer5558
    @josefstahlhammer5558 5 лет назад +1

    I'd actually like to know the soundtrack to this

  • @tkomla
    @tkomla 5 лет назад +6

    Makes me think of debriding a wound. So effective therapy perhaps helps this?

    • @tarnopol
      @tarnopol 5 лет назад +2

      It does!

    • @MrRichofheart
      @MrRichofheart 5 лет назад

      you are exactly right Tamar,....you, know the meaning of the word dysfunctional?....dys means wound....therefore dysfunctional anything.... has plenty of function but is just wounded.....gabor helps me with my debriding of my societal/family/former marriage wounds.....so......truth beauty and justice................................................ grandfather richard

    • @dotdashdotdash
      @dotdashdotdash 3 года назад

      Be aware that very few therapists understand ptsd, complex ptsd, or have even heard of personality disorders such as narcissistic p.d., which abusers often have. A lot of therapists are just on the hustle and see you as a walking ATM, they do little more than reflect back what you say. Or they just re-traumatize you. I have learned more from watching RUclips videos and reading books, than I ever got from “therapists” who took money that I needed for other things.

  • @catalinadrian2531
    @catalinadrian2531 4 года назад

    Bravo Laurentiule

  • @surya-ravi
    @surya-ravi 6 лет назад +5

    Beautiful, I didn't think gabor's words put in this format would be so powerful. I think the production could be better though, thanks for sharing

  • @isacol1854
    @isacol1854 5 лет назад

    You are so right.

  • @jordsupp
    @jordsupp 3 года назад

    Perfect

  • @vlucky2811
    @vlucky2811 4 года назад

    Very valuable

  • @davidk349
    @davidk349 5 лет назад

    We lose the sub self which carries the pain of being ignored in childhood, so we have to find ways to reconnect, since it is guarded by other parts to protect our true self from the pain. Read up on IFS, this explains better what he is saying.

  • @livelearnandteach7402
    @livelearnandteach7402 5 лет назад +4

    How do i know when ive found my true self?

    • @user-qt1le6ih6i
      @user-qt1le6ih6i 4 года назад +8

      When you feel at peace. When you no longer feel a need to explain yourself to others. When you start truly seeing the world for what it is and not for how you thought it was. When you feel changed and more aware than ever. You'll know when you've found your true self. You'll just know :)

    • @jenniedevereaux2696
      @jenniedevereaux2696 4 года назад

      The peace that passes all understanding 😇❤️🙏

    • @dotdashdotdash
      @dotdashdotdash 3 года назад +1

      It’s an ongoing process of discovery that requires time and self reflection, I don’t think it ever ends but deepens over time if you willingly learn and seek more knowledge both externally and internally.

  • @askyeshka726
    @askyeshka726 7 лет назад +3

    In your description can you please link the original source of Gabor talk?

  • @irishelk3
    @irishelk3 4 года назад

    Curiously, Gurdjieff said that alcohol takes us back to our essence. He didn't say to become a drunkard though. And to add, being yourself in todays society will only bring misfortune, we have to keep our talents hidden from others least they make our lives difficult because of their envy -- this happens a lot in the workplace. It is almost impossible to survive if one voices his or her own opinions or reveals intelligence, you have to become a unit like all the rest of them, so they feel comfortable with themselves, very easy to read people these days. And this is wisdom, real wisdom to act like this around others. You should be able to be yourself around your family and friends and if you can't then they're not your friends. Our society likes mediocrity because it doesn't offend, the real talents are ignored, the artists with some raw talent, musicians, actors, singer/songwriters, architects, painters...Just try playing some good music around people who love chart music, they will not tolerate it. Our whole world needs a restart, we can only change through the Ayahuasca of the Amazon and other plant teachers, not a pill from a clueless doctor. Our culture always seems to repress the originality and goodness of the human spirit, the hippies, the plant medicines, assassinating great people, demolition of beautiful buildings, imprisonment or trials of genius inventors or thinkers. We have to help ourselves, animals and the environment and if we don't do that, ignore politicians, they will lose their power, pay attention to the animals and the people in the world that need our help, we can't fuck around anymore.

    • @dotdashdotdash
      @dotdashdotdash 3 года назад

      Humans as a species as a whole, are utterly dreadful. They make the most savage tribe of chimpanzees look like enlightened Buddhas by comparison. I read recently that the human race will go extinct because of its intra-species competition and savagery. Somewhere between 200,000 to 8 million years from now. Personally I think it will be much sooner. The planet may then begin to heal itself, once our poisonous presence has gone.

    • @irishelk3
      @irishelk3 3 года назад

      Every morning I walk in the fields with my dog, only to find more rubbish, more black marks from fires and burnt wheelie bins, stolen burnt out scooters and cars. Personally, I would make it totally illegal to be a scumbag. I would have a facility in the countryside and sift the savable from the bad eggs, keep the badnds locked up, and teach the rest of them about compassion and love, wisdom and respect, and if they stay on that path, they don’t have to return.

  • @МарияБонева-о1й
    @МарияБонева-о1й 3 года назад +2

    Can I translate it into bulgarian? To put bg sub?

  • @annhorn7805
    @annhorn7805 6 лет назад +8

    Valuable words. Could you cut out the music. Its hard to hear him. Thank you.

    • @laurentiuzloteanu7352
      @laurentiuzloteanu7352  6 лет назад +1

      please give a chance to listen the full discourse (without music) here: ruclips.net/video/ZdO-Nyk4-jU/видео.html

    • @richardbragstad2381
      @richardbragstad2381 6 лет назад

      I agree. The music only gets in the way of his talk. What can we do? The producers like their distracting music, so we are stuck with it.

    • @josefstahlhammer5558
      @josefstahlhammer5558 5 лет назад +2

      Richard Bragstad oh come on dude it's an awesome moody video

    • @nelgrace1969
      @nelgrace1969 5 лет назад +2

      Focus on the words.... if you are irritated by the music, focus on the feeling as opposed to the music. So easy to hear Gabor with or without the music

    • @gitarist25
      @gitarist25 5 лет назад

      @@laurentiuzloteanu7352 what is the music used?

  • @beeline717171
    @beeline717171 2 года назад

    You don't need the music. Let the words be the music

  • @xx-kb5zi
    @xx-kb5zi Год назад

  • @DiamondHeart888
    @DiamondHeart888 6 лет назад +5

    💗💗💗🙏🙏🙏🌹🌹🌹

  • @monica86209
    @monica86209 6 лет назад +4

    My idol

  • @johannasturludottir6770
    @johannasturludottir6770 7 лет назад +1

    I can not hear the names he mentions in the beginning. Can someone tell me?

  • @invisioner8472
    @invisioner8472 5 лет назад +3

    You (believed) you lost the connection to yourself. You bought into an illusion, one which you made real.

    • @gail9566
      @gail9566 5 лет назад

      Scrub away at the dead parts and the smell and pus and get down the wound bed that is the soil of healing.

  • @silviaflores791
    @silviaflores791 5 лет назад

    🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

  • @intp9944
    @intp9944 4 года назад

    i have a question ..isn’t it in human nature to seek validation from others bcs people want to be accepted in general ,and should it be important to you?...i see such a contradiction in this..to be honest i never really cared bcs i was not judged before i was the best kid in class ,but i think i care now when i did something that i need in my life i made a gap year even that i look like genius to everyone bcs i prepared something that they were preparing for one year i did it in two months after getting to uni i had a mental breakdown i can say bcs i was not sure if living with my abusive father is still something i should so and i didn’t really know what is that that i wanna be obsessed about i knew it was something in science..so i made a move wich people in my country judge and now i feel like i am not even accepted by the other i mean i am but from the people i used to hang out in the past wich i have no connection to anymore and i don’t even care about them but bcs my father never let me be who i am maybe i now i have a need to be accepted by the world bcs nobody is able to see who i actually am anymore......and i disconnected from myself that much that you guys wouldn’t believe even though i was able to do such great things my father still didn’t think the same as everyone around me would so i believed that i am what he thinks and i putted my studies in state of stillness bcs of depression, i needed to heal but now i feel like world doesn’t care what my reality was and that i ni longer have a right to be great again like i used to be and what i always was not like great success and everything but to really see myself like that .......bcs i made mistake wich world is judging for sure ...so yeah i feel like my chances are gone i finished my life already i started uni after a year of and i am really good student but i have so many thoughts and i still feel like i don’t deserve this and even though i am still who i am i feel like everyone are better then me bcs they would never to something like this to themselves and i basically putted a knife in my own backs bcs my father was forcing me to leave the uni or he will abuse my mother even more ah what a stupid trap just bcs it was easierfor him if i am working so he doesn’t have to pay me anything.....anyway i disconnected from myself totally and now i am back and i am studying what i wanted i started uni after that gap year so i hope nobody will judge me bcs i didn’t started my uni in the year i was accepted and bcs i made a gap year right after i was accepted bcs i didn’t start it when my generation who are nothing better then me i was quite above them let’s say in a lot results but of i am nothing better then them also ...now i am wondering is it the reason why now i feel like maybe it was wrong i was too weak i needed to heal i know but yeah world doesn’t care...before deep down i never cared what people think because like really it’s true we are living at one world together etc but your life is only your life and how can i judge anyone when they are maybe going through even worst shit then me really?Who are you to judge anyone at the end it so complicated bcs we are all people but we are having such a different lives maybe not all of us but yeah..there are i hope someone reads this and shares the opinion tnx ,people in my country are too closed minded anyway and i feel like i lost respect that i used to have before when i never really was aware that i had it that much so yeah tnx

  • @davidlister6721
    @davidlister6721 Год назад

    Can do without the music…why guild the lily

  • @joy7592
    @joy7592 3 года назад

    🥺😭

  • @jennifergalberth1240
    @jennifergalberth1240 4 года назад +2

    Beaten INTO enlightenment...😂🖤❤🖤❤🖤❤🖤❤💕🙊🙉🙈😇😇😇

  • @stefpix
    @stefpix 5 лет назад +2

    The music disconnects the words I want to hear. The music is too loud and not needed.

  • @traceycoryell8704
    @traceycoryell8704 5 лет назад

    #bevulnerable

  • @mariamkinen8036
    @mariamkinen8036 3 года назад

    THE LONGER WE spend time watching these channels The MORE LAUNDERED MONEY FLOWS in. To the pockets of the mafia.

  • @frankolm2795
    @frankolm2795 7 лет назад +10

    Great post, shame about the music.

    • @artmanrom
      @artmanrom 7 лет назад

      Frank Olm :) It's very hard to found a best suited non copyrighted music for RUclips videos nowadays

    • @lovethineownself7994
      @lovethineownself7994 6 лет назад +1

      I agree with Frank Olm. Music by nature distracts because by nature, doesn't matter what music it is, it will influence the process that the speech causes in the listening person. Deep stuff should never be combined with music but let be standing alone for perceiving it's full potential in oneself. Just my humble opinion.

  • @HakuCell
    @HakuCell 4 года назад +1

    I kinda disagree with the the second quote showed at the very beginning of the video. One needs knowledge for guidance and one awesome needs a safe social context or relation or relations to reconnect with gut feelings

  • @urbaneriksson9781
    @urbaneriksson9781 3 года назад +1

    I can't connect because someone put a highly irritating noise in the way of the words. It's about as good as forcing me to drink liquor when meditating i think.

    • @laurentiuzloteanu7352
      @laurentiuzloteanu7352  3 года назад +1

      ruclips.net/video/ZdO-Nyk4-jU/видео.html try the full experience. Next time read the description please

    • @urbaneriksson9781
      @urbaneriksson9781 3 года назад

      @@laurentiuzloteanu7352 thank you for that information. Sorry!

  • @MegaSpiritualWarrior
    @MegaSpiritualWarrior 3 года назад

    Jesus Christ is the Lord!

  • @richardbragstad2381
    @richardbragstad2381 6 лет назад +11

    Remarkable talk, but stupid music really ruins it. There is no way to stop it. Insane producers think their music adds something, when it only detracts from the talk.

  • @Cccjjj323
    @Cccjjj323 5 лет назад +3

    Why this music .... please stop ?!

    • @ninakarimy
      @ninakarimy 3 года назад

      Ja. I think the same everytime there is music put to a speech

  • @TheTengen
    @TheTengen 4 года назад

    Thank you.