Lmao brother is just mad that he didn’t have the spine to tell the parents no. He could have just set boundaries and is upset at learning how OP did it and succeeded.
lol I like to imagine he's also a theatre kid at heart but pushed it aside to become the golden child and is incredibly frustrated as a result, reenacting Wicked choreography alone in his house and crying
These parents should participate at the next olympic, i'm sure they would won the gold medal for mental gymnastic truly incredible Also the brother talking about "not picking a side" then immediatly defend the parents deserve a gold medal too
LOOOOL “AITA for not giving my parents money after they disowned me for my career choice” At what point are we allowed to say “YTA for asking such a stupid question” (also why are the parents acting like giving them money is some privilege 😂)
When people tell you they aren't picking sides, they absolutely ARE picking sides, and the side they're picking isn't yours. OP should just throw rSlash's words at the brother: "THEN YOU DO IT!!!"
A child NEVER has the "responsibility" to financially support their parents. If they want to help, cool, thats on them. But you are absolutely not obligated to give them $100k just because they're your parents. Your parents are just narcissists
Yeah. She's too hard on him. The rest of the family apparently noticed. And not one person stood up for her. Well, except her cousin and aunt. So why does everyone else get a pass, but not her brother. He tried to mediate, and also had the most to lose from having a bad relationship with his parents too. I'm not saying the parents aren't at fault. UT I think the blame is mostly on them. Instead of blocking him after she said her peace, she should have tried to open a dialog with him, and help him understand her.
”We wanted to exploit our most successful child but we had no idea that it was you even if you offered to support us, so now we’d like to correct that mistake since we feel it’s unfair to our favorite child that had to finance our lives all on his own for the past few years and we would happily accept an outrageous amount of money from you, thanks!”
“How dare you not tell us how much money you make so that we can demand it” The audacity 🙄 why are you trying to get either of your kids to support you take care of yourself
I guess the parents never heard of "never throw stones when you live in a glass house"or" Don't lie to ruin someone's life when yours can be ruined by the truth" And how in the world is op the one who is messed up for telling the truth? Her brother is definitely siding with her parents op just didn't see it till now.
My family was unsupportive about some stuff, but my photography was not one of them. My father got me a camera and portable printer when I was 17. When I finally decided to go to art school and focus on photography and graphic design on big Brother supported that fully. And they always suggest me to anybody and everybody who needs photos made.
Ahh yes, the parents that basically went “How dare you support the child we tried to abandon because they wouldn’t bend to our whims. It’s your fault that our child hates us now.”
OP, just ignore and move forward without the ungrateful leaches for their crappy behavior and immaturity to OP's wealthy career. "Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience."
Haven’t heard it whole but here is my two cents. Never treat your kids like some sort of insurance. You choose to bring them into the world without asking if they wanted to or not. You oughta raise them good without making them feel like they owe you something. They don’t owe you for a favor they didn’t ask for because that so called favor of yours became your responsibility the moment you decided to be a parent. Your kids don’t owe you anything for your own responsibility.
Parents need to stop disowning their kids for following their dreams. Because freaking photography, it's actually one of the best things that you can do, especially at weddings. You get paid a lot depending on your quality and experience. And you don't have to report to anyone.
9:54 If I learned something from those types of storries, when someone says that they don't want to take sides, they are taking the side against you 😅 (Few second later proved correct)
Man, ngl, the brother had a point, she wanted them to accept her help and all, they refused, apparently because they thought she had no money, she could have gone like "I do actually, I make 6 figures." The whole "I want people to trust me when I say/do things" doesn't really work when it comes to people you barely know and people who barely know you, since you have no bonds yet, which is pretty much the case between op and her parents, I'm not defending her parents by any means, just that her argument is kinda flawed.
Just because you share DNA doesn't mean you're family, thats something you learn eventually sense there is always a family member that is narcisistic, malicious and greedy everybody has one and it is okay to treat those people as strangers or with hostility, because they are strangers and they are people who want to hurt you.
It isn't you and your brother's responsibility to support your parents. Businesses go under all the time. When that occurs, then people just have to start working at some other job instead. 😡😡😡
You owe them nothing they chose tonhave you not the other way around tell them the only help they are getting from you is the move to the worst home in the state
Op is NTA because she clearly offered to help her parents, they declined and op doesn't have to tell them it is because that didn't approve of her career and they were just being entitled.
The only question I have is if she knew the brother was seemingly making less the entire time. If she was willing to support their parents, knew that she was making more than the brother, and knew that the brother was going to be put upon in her place she definitely should have spoken up about how much she made. If she knew she was making more, then she's not an asshole to the parents who shouldn't be expecting the support of either of them but she's definitely an asshole to the brother.
He treated her as she never existed it got into his head that he was better than her but when he heard she was more successful it hurt his small ego His spineless ass can suck up to his parents his entire life
They did exaggerate over how much money he was making, and made themselves fully dependent on him. And practically disowned their daughter until they wanted to save face. He did too. Even if she knew the truth, she doesn't owe anything to the people who rejected her and only see her when she benefits them. All of a sudden, they remember she's blood
Never be dumb enough to disclose your pay to anyone you're trying to help financially. You will always be taken advantage of. If they weren't so idiotic themselves, they would've welcomed financial support from both kids. They just wanna mooch now that they think they can get easy money and not have to work for it.
Don't be angry with your brother. He is probably dealing with quite a bit of financial hardship because he is supporting your parents. More then likely he only took their side because he feels like he can't stop helping them now, but needs some help himself.
I can't understand parents like this. Assuming my daughter doesn't do anything to burn bridges with me or show me she doesn't deserve it: I will give her as much as I can so she can live a better life; and I'll die alone in the wilderness before I make her support me. So these parents demanding 100k is just insane.
How come that being a photographer is not a respectable profession? Without photographers, our world will be a boring one. Publications, news, as well as advertising depends on photography.
There's exactly 1 expectation I have for my child. For them to be happy and try to find happiness again during tough times. It is not my place to judge what their version of 'happy' looks like. (Though that's only career wise expectations. On a personal level, I've got a few more ideas aka don't grow up to be an asshole)
Its not your responsibility to support your parents. They are supposed to take care of YOU. Unless they're just old and decrepit in the nursing home. But if you owe anybody its the aunt who supported you when she didn't have to.
What is it with all these parents and thinking their children owe them for raising them? Gtfo you wanted to have kids. Raising them is part of the deal. Not some favorite you did for them.
the original stuff about the brother not being on OP’s side about telling the parents their income is kinda dumb to me. Just because the brother didn’t fully agree with them completely didn’t mean he was against them.
How many people tell their parents or "family" how much money they make? 🤔 I think it shows itself if someone is doing well or not just by looking at their everyday life. It isn't hard to guess. I think it is classless to ask someone what they make. Unless they are your accountant it is no one else's business.
A photographer could make a lot of money if they are well known for their work. My cousin does video and he is in demand. He is never home and makes a lot of money.
I don’t now what happening in west but i think my parents will take care of me when am young then I will take care of them when they are old .. that’s normal.
The way I’m hearing it. The parents always made fun of OP and never gave them a chance to say how much they made. They just assumed that there was no way OP could be making enough money so hope he wasn’t hiding how much money they were making. The parents just assumed they weren’t making enough it’s not how he’s fault that they didn’t do any research into the field that OP was in or that they just assumed they knew everything about the field and that the field wouldn’t pay enoughthey never gave OP a chance they never asked about the field. They just decided and then treated OP like crap it’s not his responsibility to go out of the way and say you’re treating me like crap but here’s how much money I make.
The OP did absolutely nothing wrong, nor do they deserve any money. Their mental gymnastics are narcissistic gaslighting coupled with them realizing their own inadequacies. The brother, of course, has no one to blame but himself. The fact that they only wanted money just proves that they most likely only wanted to be "taken care of". They didn't at all do any research anything about her chosen profession, and they didn't want her help before, and they broke the bond of family. They would have taken as much from her as they could get away with. Running a cafe always is a risk, and after the Pandemic, it is even worse. They want all the rewards of being biological parents, without any of the responsibilities, and the OP's parents are pathetic and they need to believe nothing is their fault. The reality is that they only wanted their side to be believed.. even when it is mostly lies. I have no sympathy for the brother, as now he has made his choice. I am glad she was the Maid of Honor for her cousin's wedding.
Parents who raise children with the expectation of being sustained by them, or even of monetary compensation, are utterly delusional. YOUR CHILDREN DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING.
If the parents won't take down their post, then make your own post to let friends and family know. And you yourself admitted you were bluffing about legal action, so what other reason would the parents have to take their post down? If the truth favors you, then post the truth.
Op is insufferable... Yes you are a victim here but gosh you are insufferable... Whiny, delusional at some points and so WHINY Just sort them out and stop crying they don't love you. Some people can't love and you can't change that. Generally you can't change how people FEEL about you especially when they already decided how they feel... Its childish AF
Lmao brother is just mad that he didn’t have the spine to tell the parents no. He could have just set boundaries and is upset at learning how OP did it and succeeded.
@Heydodoakskdkdjf exactly, I guess he's jealous of the fact that op can stand up to her parents and he can't
lol I like to imagine he's also a theatre kid at heart but pushed it aside to become the golden child and is incredibly frustrated as a result, reenacting Wicked choreography alone in his house and crying
R.I.P.
These parents should participate at the next olympic, i'm sure they would won the gold medal for mental gymnastic truly incredible
Also the brother talking about "not picking a side" then immediatly defend the parents deserve a gold medal too
LOOOOL
“AITA for not giving my parents money after they disowned me for my career choice”
At what point are we allowed to say “YTA for asking such a stupid question”
(also why are the parents acting like giving them money is some privilege 😂)
Fr 😂
Likely an Asian family
That usually falls under the comment of 'karma farmer'
When people tell you they aren't picking sides, they absolutely ARE picking sides, and the side they're picking isn't yours.
OP should just throw rSlash's words at the brother: "THEN YOU DO IT!!!"
A child NEVER has the "responsibility" to financially support their parents. If they want to help, cool, thats on them. But you are absolutely not obligated to give them $100k just because they're your parents. Your parents are just narcissists
Depends on the culture. In most countries, people have children as their retirement plan.
@gnhun101 culture doesnt matter. Laws do.
29 states in the USA require children to care and pay for senior parents in need.
the way she called her cousin her sister in the end ❤
Yea, OP's cousin seemed more like her actual sibling and I am sure that it's both sided 🥰
Brother just supports parents cause they gave him love and support
In his eyes they aren’t bad
Yeah. She's too hard on him. The rest of the family apparently noticed. And not one person stood up for her. Well, except her cousin and aunt. So why does everyone else get a pass, but not her brother. He tried to mediate, and also had the most to lose from having a bad relationship with his parents too. I'm not saying the parents aren't at fault. UT I think the blame is mostly on them. Instead of blocking him after she said her peace, she should have tried to open a dialog with him, and help him understand her.
”We wanted to exploit our most successful child but we had no idea that it was you even if you offered to support us, so now we’d like to correct that mistake since we feel it’s unfair to our favorite child that had to finance our lives all on his own for the past few years and we would happily accept an outrageous amount of money from you, thanks!”
“How dare you not tell us how much money you make so that we can demand it”
The audacity 🙄 why are you trying to get either of your kids to support you take care of yourself
I guess the parents never heard of "never throw stones when you live in a glass house"or" Don't lie to ruin someone's life when yours can be ruined by the truth" And how in the world is op the one who is messed up for telling the truth? Her brother is definitely siding with her parents op just didn't see it till now.
My family was unsupportive about some stuff, but my photography was not one of them. My father got me a camera and portable printer when I was 17. When I finally decided to go to art school and focus on photography and graphic design on big Brother supported that fully. And they always suggest me to anybody and everybody who needs photos made.
Nice 😊
The sheer entitlement! No one even the parents have any rights to know someone else's finance or how much they earned.
Parents are meant to support their children no matter what.
Depends on the situation
Eh not all the time
Not all the time. If the child does something truly wrong, it’s alright for the parents to turn their back. But these two are simply chodes.
Likely an Asian family
Ahh yes, the parents that basically went “How dare you support the child we tried to abandon because they wouldn’t bend to our whims. It’s your fault that our child hates us now.”
Has OP never heard of defamation? "Who would waste resources on this?" More than you'd think
OP, just ignore and move forward without the ungrateful leaches for their crappy behavior and immaturity to OP's wealthy career.
"Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience."
Haven’t heard it whole but here is my two cents. Never treat your kids like some sort of insurance. You choose to bring them into the world without asking if they wanted to or not. You oughta raise them good without making them feel like they owe you something. They don’t owe you for a favor they didn’t ask for because that so called favor of yours became your responsibility the moment you decided to be a parent. Your kids don’t owe you anything for your own responsibility.
Parents need to stop disowning their kids for following their dreams. Because freaking photography, it's actually one of the best things that you can do, especially at weddings. You get paid a lot depending on your quality and experience. And you don't have to report to anyone.
"I don't want to take sides, BUT *Proceeds to justify the side they're on that's not yours*"
i feel sad for the poor brother honestly
9:54 If I learned something from those types of storries, when someone says that they don't want to take sides, they are taking the side against you 😅
(Few second later proved correct)
Man, ngl, the brother had a point, she wanted them to accept her help and all, they refused, apparently because they thought she had no money, she could have gone like "I do actually, I make 6 figures." The whole "I want people to trust me when I say/do things" doesn't really work when it comes to people you barely know and people who barely know you, since you have no bonds yet, which is pretty much the case between op and her parents, I'm not defending her parents by any means, just that her argument is kinda flawed.
Just because you share DNA doesn't mean you're family, thats something you learn eventually sense there is always a family member that is narcisistic, malicious and greedy everybody has one and it is okay to treat those people as strangers or with hostility, because they are strangers and they are people who want to hurt you.
It isn't you and your brother's responsibility to support your parents. Businesses go under all the time. When that occurs, then people just have to start working at some other job instead. 😡😡😡
I blame the cousin for letting it slip that OP makes six figures.
Well in her defense she was tired of them pretending their daughter wasnt relevant, but i see your point
Children arent responsible to take care of their parents just because they gave birth to them.
You owe them nothing they chose tonhave you not the other way around tell them the only help they are getting from you is the move to the worst home in the state
Op is NTA because she clearly offered to help her parents, they declined and op doesn't have to tell them it is because that didn't approve of her career and they were just being entitled.
The only question I have is if she knew the brother was seemingly making less the entire time.
If she was willing to support their parents, knew that she was making more than the brother, and knew that the brother was going to be put upon in her place she definitely should have spoken up about how much she made.
If she knew she was making more, then she's not an asshole to the parents who shouldn't be expecting the support of either of them but she's definitely an asshole to the brother.
Brother was indifferent to her she ain't the asshole
He treated her as she never existed it got into his head that he was better than her but when he heard she was more successful it hurt his small ego
His spineless ass can suck up to his parents his entire life
They did exaggerate over how much money he was making, and made themselves fully dependent on him. And practically disowned their daughter until they wanted to save face. He did too. Even if she knew the truth, she doesn't owe anything to the people who rejected her and only see her when she benefits them. All of a sudden, they remember she's blood
Never be dumb enough to disclose your pay to anyone you're trying to help financially. You will always be taken advantage of. If they weren't so idiotic themselves, they would've welcomed financial support from both kids. They just wanna mooch now that they think they can get easy money and not have to work for it.
Brother: I don't want to pick a side * proceeds to pick the parents' side *
Don't be angry with your brother. He is probably dealing with quite a bit of financial hardship because he is supporting your parents. More then likely he only took their side because he feels like he can't stop helping them now, but needs some help himself.
I can't understand parents like this. Assuming my daughter doesn't do anything to burn bridges with me or show me she doesn't deserve it: I will give her as much as I can so she can live a better life; and I'll die alone in the wilderness before I make her support me. So these parents demanding 100k is just insane.
How come that being a photographer is not a respectable profession? Without photographers, our world will be a boring one. Publications, news, as well as advertising depends on photography.
Sounds like an Asian family. If you aren't part of one, it would be hard to understand from the outside.
No one business what u make . No not your or brother Responsibility pay for your parents life
The parents only backed the brother and dropped OP. They aren't owed a dime.
Those are not parents but financial leeches for both children. Both kids need to boot the moochers. They can still work.
There's exactly 1 expectation I have for my child. For them to be happy and try to find happiness again during tough times. It is not my place to judge what their version of 'happy' looks like.
(Though that's only career wise expectations. On a personal level, I've got a few more ideas aka don't grow up to be an asshole)
First problem is your parents think you owe them because they raised you.
Its not your responsibility to support your parents. They are supposed to take care of YOU. Unless they're just old and decrepit in the nursing home. But if you owe anybody its the aunt who supported you when she didn't have to.
Parents didn't even got the bronze medal on acting since they played the victims so poorly
What is it with all these parents and thinking their children owe them for raising them? Gtfo you wanted to have kids. Raising them is part of the deal. Not some favorite you did for them.
the original stuff about the brother not being on OP’s side about telling the parents their income is kinda dumb to me. Just because the brother didn’t fully agree with them completely didn’t mean he was against them.
How many people tell their parents or "family" how much money they make? 🤔 I think it shows itself if someone is doing well or not just by looking at their everyday life. It isn't hard to guess. I think it is classless to ask someone what they make. Unless they are your accountant it is no one else's business.
Brother is like “I don’t want to take sides BUT” immediately takes a side
He's forced to.
A photographer could make a lot of money if they are well known for their work. My cousin does video and he is in demand. He is never home and makes a lot of money.
They disowned you but now want money... 🤯
Why does her and her brother have to support their parents?
I don’t now what happening in west but i think my parents will take care of me when am young then I will take care of them when they are old .. that’s normal.
Lol ,Gold diggers warning ⚠️, I hate gold diggers ,don't help them because they didn't support you
Your parents, who never believed in your dream, are now just gold diggers with their hands out. Cut ties with them
The way I’m hearing it. The parents always made fun of OP and never gave them a chance to say how much they made. They just assumed that there was no way OP could be making enough money so hope he wasn’t hiding how much money they were making. The parents just assumed they weren’t making enough it’s not how he’s fault that they didn’t do any research into the field that OP was in or that they just assumed they knew everything about the field and that the field wouldn’t pay enoughthey never gave OP a chance they never asked about the field. They just decided and then treated OP like crap it’s not his responsibility to go out of the way and say you’re treating me like crap but here’s how much money I make.
Op is in the right
The OP did absolutely nothing wrong, nor do they deserve any money. Their mental gymnastics are narcissistic gaslighting coupled with them realizing their own inadequacies. The brother, of course, has no one to blame but himself. The fact that they only wanted money just proves that they most likely only wanted to be "taken care of". They didn't at all do any research anything about her chosen profession, and they didn't want her help before, and they broke the bond of family. They would have taken as much from her as they could get away with. Running a cafe always is a risk, and after the Pandemic, it is even worse.
They want all the rewards of being biological parents, without any of the responsibilities, and the OP's parents are pathetic and they need to believe nothing is their fault. The reality is that they only wanted their side to be believed.. even when it is mostly lies. I have no sympathy for the brother, as now he has made his choice. I am glad she was the Maid of Honor for her cousin's wedding.
i mean the parents post IS defamation so he could file a lawsuit prob
Op wanted the ppl who didn't care about her in her life?doormat move on op part, should have stayed no contact with them.
I feel like the posters should specify where they live. It definitely depends on the culture the live in if they're the a-hole or not.
Parents that always relies on their kids for financel support, Chinese story if course.
honestly i kinda get the parents, going for a not so stable career isnt wise, but good for OP.
True but if u were them i would have had a calm decision discussing scenarios on how it would effect op
Not straight up disowning the child....
@SierraHamila agree.
@SierraHamila yeah, im not agreeing with their decision making too.
The sister turned into a brother?
Parents who raise children with the expectation of being sustained by them, or even of monetary compensation, are utterly delusional.
YOUR CHILDREN DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING.
If the parents won't take down their post, then make your own post to let friends and family know.
And you yourself admitted you were bluffing about legal action, so what other reason would the parents have to take their post down?
If the truth favors you, then post the truth.
They are not your parents after they dis**not allowed to write that word by youtube** you
I'll take "Things That Never Happened" for $200 please Alex.
Op is insufferable... Yes you are a victim here but gosh you are insufferable... Whiny, delusional at some points and so WHINY
Just sort them out and stop crying they don't love you. Some people can't love and you can't change that.
Generally you can't change how people FEEL about you especially when they already decided how they feel... Its childish AF
First
Last
Fist to say nobody cares
YTA
yesn't 🤫🧏
Lol ,Gold diggers warning ⚠️, I hate gold diggers ,don't help them because they didn't support you
Lol ,Gold diggers warning ⚠️, I hate gold diggers ,don't help them because they didn't support you