Ahh, trans-temporal forcefields! Now it all makes sense, I knew the ridiculously obscene tax overspending had to have gone _somewhere,_ - Now i know. 🤔
This guy never does a bad review! He has the witticism of a Mike Nelson or a Joel Hodgson. I honestly don't see why he doesn't have a gig on TV...if he'd let me co-write and executive produce I'd get him on IFC or something. Keep up the good work!!!
When I was younger (the 1980s) I joined the sci-fi book club (advertised on the backs of Sunday supplements in the UK) introductory offer of 5 books for 99p etc. Hubbard Books were all over the place. I was intrigued because there were so many, but I hated the covers and went for safe buys. I shudder to think what would have happened if i had taken a chance on them.
The most disbelieving yhing about it was L Ron Hubbard passed himself off as a great sci fi writer. His stories are so badlt concieved they make your brain cry.
I read one of Hubbard’s early short novels, about a starship that travels repeatedly between Earth and one of its first colonies (on a planet orbiting one of the nearer stars), its crew experiencing time dilation because they have to travel near the speed of light, and thereby outliving people they’ve left behind and becoming a sort of isolated society that shanghais new crew members as needed. It’s pretty good but no better than the lesser works of better SF writers like Heinlein or Asimov. Hubbard was never going to be one of the better SF writers, so he found fame and fortune as a con man by founding a pseudo-science with religious trappings - that he made into a religion.
4:21-Thanks for fixing that. It was making my head hurt. May have been the movie. How did L.Ron get people to buy his books? The worst thing? From minute 1 to the end.
I actually saw this in theaters back when it came out. I could not freaking stop laughing. It was SO FUNNY. My favorite bit is still that there's a fleet of harrier jets just sitting there, armed, fueled, ready to go, not having degraded in any way over the course of a THOUSAND YEARS.
@@dunbar9finger they don't describe it, but I imagine that a nine-minute war would focus on personnel and infrastructure, possibly many armaments on the losing side would be intact. Not that it's probably, but maybe the least unlikely of this mess.
The Book actually did mention how the Psychlos conquered Earth: they simply teleported a single Gas Drone (which is described as basically a big, fully automated and heavily armored airship) over, which then proceeded to fly rings around the planet, periodically dropping Gas Canisters (poisoning nearly everyone) while shrugging off every attack Human Fighter planes threw at it. Psychlo ground forces only followed after almost the entire World Population has suffocated, so actual resistance is minimal. A brief skirmish with a handful of surviving Army Cadets is mentioned as the biggest „Battle“ after the Gas Drone did its thing.
In the 1990s, John Travolta had a good resurgence, a comeback for his career with stuff like Get Shorty, Pulp Fiction, Face Off, etc. Then he did Battlefield Earth in 2000. Oof.
"We don't review religions" That's fine best Scientology claimed that it wasn't a religion or religious at all but a technology for the first 50 year of its existence But when they owed a lot of back taxes the claimed they were a religion to get tax exempt status
No that's the best thing about this movie. It was intentionally made to be a epic great science fiction action drama movie and it is a box office bomb, and failed in the best ways possible. It's a unintentional comedy, and is memorable because it's a great awful movie that is a unintentional comedy. When movies are intentionally made to be good or great, and hugely fail to be good or great movies the movie can be a so bad it's good movie.
@@criceto I feel like this is a huge understatement, but any alternative fails me. It is staggering to compare BE to another space opera. Think about how much worse this movie is than a regular bad movie like Battle Beyond the Stars. Really think about it. Just pick something... cinematography, acting, protagonist's arc - whatever. BE is not remotely as good as Spacehunter in any of these ways. Forrest Whittaker is in this movie!! It's like considering the size of the Earth to the Sun - and the Sun is just a regular star among hundreds of billions, in a regular galaxy among trillions in the observable universe. And there is presumably more we can never know about. Comparing BE to, say, Empire Strikes Back is like that. It is actually mind boggling. Sorry. I'm ranting. I get that Zardozs happen. After all of these years, I still do not understand Why Battlefield Earth is what it is.
One of the films I walked out on before it was finished-- I think it was not long after the human resistance commandeered centuries old Harrier jets to defeat the invaders.
I don't think they read the book, only cliff notes, when they made the movie. or they read the notes frome someone who took notes while reading the cliff notes. I actually read the book when it came out, the movie barely follows the book.
Little late to the comments, but the worst thing about this movie isn't the plot, nor the constant Dutch angles(camera man was probably drunk), not even the overacting scene chewing. It the fact this movie was MADE!!!
The worst thing about it is they didn’t even actually follow the book and they tried to condense it down. The book is way more expansive. And so is the audiobook
i love this movie! and yes.............i understand and acknowledge how horrible every aspect of it is. i also put pickled jalapenos on peanut butter sandwiches. there you go.
HAHAHAHA those harriers would have been piles of rust after 1000 years!!! and even if they had survived somehow any fuel stored for them would have gone bad approx 999 years ago!!
I made the comment to someone the other day that Gingerdead Man 3 was the shittiest movie ever made. I had forgotten this one. My poor brain had tried to block it out of my consciousness.....Thank you for the renewed mental trauma.
The book, while only an okay sci fi romp, at least has far, far, fewer plot holes. Many of the plot idocy in the movie is either not present or explained in the book. For example in the book fort knox was on of the first places the invaders went for gold and the gold jhony uses is some he found in an old and irradiated armored truck that got burred in rubble. Furthermore, at 1000 pages long the book can also be used as body armor.
Any chance to do a review on: Pontypool (www.imdb.com/title/tt1226681/) Splinter(www.imdb.com/title/tt1031280/) Galaxy of Horrors (www.imdb.com/title/tt6188002/)
Mmmmm, that alien Woman has a talented tongue. Maybe one of the Humans will teach her how to French Kiss. oops maybe the aliens killed off all the French people in the future. Yes this is "The laughing stock of the Universe. " It always, always annoys me to no end how in alien movies, the aliens speak with our slang and phrases, that are part of our language and not theirs.
I struggled to watch this film on the telly. Glad I only wasted time and brain cells on it rather than any cash. Incidentally, the financing of the film turned out to be fraudulent. A German investor forked out a particular percentage of the budget... only it turned out they were told a massively inflated figure.
My friend unironically loves this movie. He thinks the special effects are great and that the story is good. Personally, I think it's absolute garbage.
It's hard to think of a dumber villain in cinematic history than Terl... maybe Richard Lynch's bad guy in The Barbarians who forgot he didn't have a trigger finger and thus couldn't shoot his enemies with a crossbow.
The 2 goons in 101 Dalmatians. They couldn't succeed at killing freakin puppies, the puppies did escape because of using something to alter color of their fur that fooled them, also they were responsible for crashing into Cruela Devil's car. Last Action Hero The main Villain wastes time talking about he can snap his fingers using the ticket with Hannibal Lector, Freddy Krueger, and other movie villains, and is killed. Under Siege Stranix tells Ryback about where the missiles are going, shows he has the key and does get close enough for Ryback to knock the gun out of his hand and in a knife fight Ryback easily defeats him along with uses overkill. Ryback is able to use the key and detonate both missiles after getting the launch codes. So that's 3 major freakin mistakes by a Mastermind Terrorist Leader that was 10 minutes ahead of schedule for taking over a US Navy Ship.. Richie Rich Wow so a guy is smart enough to take over a Big Business Company but doesn't see the futility that Richie is wearing a bulletresistant vest instead of doing the sensible thing shoot his head not protected he continues to waste bullets shooting the protected area. That is 1 damn astounding failure.
It doesn't even qualify for a so-bad-it's-good statis. It's pretty dull if you watch it in its entirety. The shifting dutch angles get very tedious after a while and the acting is just not as campy as it should be. I imagine that for a devoted Scientologist like Travolta that this was to be homage to his dear leader LRH. I've read mixed reviews about the book itself, some I imagine are from Scientology followers. I've watched it once out of curiosity to see if it was as bad as some have said. It's dreadful. It makes Ed Wood's Plan 9 From Outer Space look like a masterpiece in comparison. Battlefield Earth takes itself far too seriously given its very silly premise. It is fun to watch select clips but a Herculean effort to actually sit through. There is a book titled Iron Dream by Norman Spinrad which has Hitler as a science fiction author writing a book within a book but filled with the Nazi ideologies he espoused in real life. Having read none of the LRH books in the series I wonder if they contain any propaganda buried under the sci-fi surface.
The worst thing about this movie?? Is that they ever actually thought it was good enough to release in theaters!!! What an absolute embarrassment!!!! Shitty story, weak unbelievable plot, zero character development, horrible special effects, awful sets, terrible acting........I could go on & on. I remember thinking that the effects would’ve been impressive had it been released in the late 70’s early 80’s. & I’m not exaggerating at all!!!!!!
What's the worse thing about this movie? That I spent good money on seeing it.There's bunch of Scientolgists that owe me ten bucks and hour and a half of my life.
Those Harrier Jump Jets are in remarkable condition for having been abandoned with 0 maintenance for 1000 years.
Quality built in the USA!
They clearly came with... endless options for renewal!
I'm sure the fuel is still good.
And even people with no fight training can fly harriers in the film
Ahh, trans-temporal forcefields!
Now it all makes sense,
I knew the ridiculously obscene tax overspending had to have gone _somewhere,_ - Now i know. 🤔
Clearly acting school was the first piece of technology lost during the alien invasion
This guy never does a bad review! He has the witticism of a Mike Nelson or a Joel Hodgson. I honestly don't see why he doesn't have a gig on TV...if he'd let me co-write and executive produce I'd get him on IFC or something. Keep up the good work!!!
He's too honest, the powers that be would shut down his show. He's better here on RUclips
When I was younger (the 1980s) I joined the sci-fi book club (advertised on the backs of Sunday supplements in the UK) introductory offer of 5 books for 99p etc. Hubbard Books were all over the place. I was intrigued because there were so many, but I hated the covers and went for safe buys. I shudder to think what would have happened if i had taken a chance on them.
The most disbelieving yhing about it was L Ron Hubbard passed himself off as a great sci fi writer. His stories are so badlt concieved they make your brain cry.
Well, as Hubbard himself said, "If you want to make a million dollars, start a religion."
I read one of Hubbard’s early short novels, about a starship that travels repeatedly between Earth and one of its first colonies (on a planet orbiting one of the nearer stars), its crew experiencing time dilation because they have to travel near the speed of light, and thereby outliving people they’ve left behind and becoming a sort of isolated society that shanghais new crew members as needed. It’s pretty good but no better than the lesser works of better SF writers like Heinlein or Asimov.
Hubbard was never going to be one of the better SF writers, so he found fame and fortune as a con man by founding a pseudo-science with religious trappings - that he made into a religion.
3:42-3:46 Must've been the class of How to Ruin Your Career So Soon After Making A Comeback.
There's a great RUclips video that compiles just the scenes of diabolical laughing.
4:21-Thanks for fixing that. It was making my head hurt. May have been the movie. How did L.Ron get people to buy his books? The worst thing? From minute 1 to the end.
The worst thing about this film is the fact that it was ever made.
Thanks so much for bringing reviews of bad or awful movies.
Your comments are hillarious and I utterely enjoy watching these reviews.
I actually saw this in theaters back when it came out. I could not freaking stop laughing. It was SO FUNNY. My favorite bit is still that there's a fleet of harrier jets just sitting there, armed, fueled, ready to go, not having degraded in any way over the course of a THOUSAND YEARS.
And furthermore supposedly the aliens attacked and the earthlings were beaten. So.. wouldn't the planes have been used during that?
@@dunbar9finger they don't describe it, but I imagine that a nine-minute war would focus on personnel and infrastructure, possibly many armaments on the losing side would be intact.
Not that it's probably, but maybe the least unlikely of this mess.
The Book actually did mention how the Psychlos conquered Earth: they simply teleported a single Gas Drone (which is described as basically a big, fully automated and heavily armored airship) over, which then proceeded to fly rings around the planet, periodically dropping Gas Canisters (poisoning nearly everyone) while shrugging off every attack Human Fighter planes threw at it. Psychlo ground forces only followed after almost the entire World Population has suffocated, so actual resistance is minimal. A brief skirmish with a handful of surviving Army Cadets is mentioned as the biggest „Battle“ after the Gas Drone did its thing.
In the 1990s, John Travolta had a good resurgence, a comeback for his career with stuff like Get Shorty, Pulp Fiction, Face Off, etc. Then he did Battlefield Earth in 2000. Oof.
We ask a lot of you guys for our free entertainment. But, I would have never asked you to subject yourself to this.
"We don't review religions"
That's fine best Scientology claimed that it wasn't a religion or religious at all but a technology for the first 50 year of its existence
But when they owed a lot of back taxes the claimed they were a religion to get tax exempt status
Why would you put yourself through this?!?!
Because it's a amazing unintentional comedy and so breathtaking in how awful it is that it's a special Extremely Bad must see movie.
when an insufferable alien meets our unsympathetic hero, boredom ensues in an all out extraveganza of wasted special effects. see you in 1000 years
With endless options for renewal!
Wow, I don’t think I have thought about the film term “Dutch angle“ in 40 years.
Worse thing about this movie is that it's not s tongue in cheek film its creators made it as a serious film
jim R6 Nope. What's worse is that John Travolta believed in this film so much, he insisted there be a sequel despite how dreadful this film was.
No that's the best thing about this movie.
It was intentionally made to be a epic great science fiction action drama movie and it is a box office bomb, and failed in the best ways possible.
It's a unintentional comedy, and is memorable because it's a great awful movie that is a unintentional comedy.
When movies are intentionally made to be good or great, and hugely fail to be good or great movies the movie can be a so bad it's good movie.
The Cyclos only wear the dreadlocks because they're huge Rob Zombie fans.
Yet another fantastic review from the greatest channel on youtube. Keep up the good work fellas. #DoubleUForHCOTM
The worst part of this movie? That it was made period.
How long is a thousand years? That's how long you have to wait till the cable guy shows up.
If this is supposed to convert me to Scientology, it didn't work.
i was never aware of how bad this film was. ;/
The worst thing about this movie was the video store wouldn't give me a refund.
Being both legally blind and a certified moron I found this movie to be the most enjoyable and fantastic two hours of my life.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Also, as a legitimate Nigerian prince I may need your help.....Be in touch shortly. 😉👍
I saw this in theaters. I didn't say I'm proud of that.
I couldn't believe this movie asked us to believe that 1000 YEAR-OLD JETS could fly, and defeat alien warcraft to boot!
I will say the movie is far less painful than the 1000 page book it is based on.
Battlefield Earth looks worse than Independence Day.
indipendence day looks directed by Kurosawa ad written by Asimov in comparision
@@criceto I feel like this is a huge understatement, but any alternative fails me. It is staggering to compare BE to another space opera. Think about how much worse this movie is than a regular bad movie like Battle Beyond the Stars. Really think about it. Just pick something... cinematography, acting, protagonist's arc - whatever. BE is not remotely as good as Spacehunter in any of these ways. Forrest Whittaker is in this movie!!
It's like considering the size of the Earth to the Sun - and the Sun is just a regular star among hundreds of billions, in a regular galaxy among trillions in the observable universe. And there is presumably more we can never know about. Comparing BE to, say, Empire Strikes Back is like that. It is actually mind boggling.
Sorry. I'm ranting. I get that Zardozs happen. After all of these years, I still do not understand Why Battlefield Earth is what it is.
@@wanderslostify A Tree Is Known by Its Fruit I suppose. The base material is the problem.
One of the films I walked out on before it was finished-- I think it was not long after the human resistance commandeered centuries old Harrier jets to defeat the invaders.
I don't think they read the book, only cliff notes, when they made the movie. or they read the notes frome someone who took notes while reading the cliff notes. I actually read the book when it came out, the movie barely follows the book.
I challenged myself to find something good about this movie, the end credits are the best thing about it.
Thank you for pointing out issues in this movie OTHER than Travolta actually putting a little effort into his performance like most people do
"The Attack of Disco Predator"
Dave Jackson. There's a skit like that reviewing this movie, it is hosted by a guy in Germany who reviews this movies. Popcorn Madness of something
John Travolta as a bad guy. oh and rat for lunch.
This is around the time Travolta jumped the shark. Face/Off is one of funniest things I have ever seen.
Little late to the comments, but the worst thing about this movie isn't the plot, nor the constant Dutch angles(camera man was probably drunk), not even the overacting scene chewing. It the fact this movie was MADE!!!
I remember seeing this in the theater. No matter how much I have tried.
I unfortunately read the novel and saw the movie. Hours of my life I can never retrieve.
I'm glad to see advanced aliens have digressed in hairdos.
The worst thing about it is they didn’t even actually follow the book and they tried to condense it down. The book is way more expansive. And so is the audiobook
I liked this one in spite of everyone and everything that told me not to.
Actually I didn't... couldn't even make it through the book.
John Travolta knew they didn't smelt the bars. You need to watch the movie again.
I read the book and ran to the cinema to see this when it was released! Holy shit was I disappointed! Phuuuuck!!
God, Cthulhu, Chuck Norris who ever bless your soul for having the tolerance for this movie. Oh and house of dark shadows for the next review
I think I'd embrace homeopathy before Robin would become a Scientologist/$cientologist
The worst part of this movie is that people are afraid to confront the Scientology elements for fear of offending that cult.
The worst thing about this movie is that there are actually some people who unironically like it
the guy who started Scientology wrote this book ..movie
Elrond Hubbard was never the same after he left middle earth
i love this movie!
and yes.............i understand and acknowledge how horrible every aspect of it is.
i also put pickled jalapenos on peanut butter sandwiches.
there you go.
Watched it once. Felt sorry for Barry Pepper, Kim Coates and Forest Whitaker.
"Euclidean Geometry"??? H.P.Lovecraft must be turning in his grave.
Awesome movie. If you like Rifts you have to see this! It was so good!
That "Spell your name" rant in nothing more than announcing to everyone how much older he is than that guy.
HAHAHAHA those harriers would have been piles of rust after 1000 years!!! and even if they had survived somehow any fuel stored for them would have gone bad approx 999 years ago!!
You found the only known flaw with this movie. :)
This movie
is exactly
everything it should be!
**Chefs kiss**
I made the comment to someone the other day that Gingerdead Man 3 was the shittiest movie ever made. I had forgotten this one. My poor brain had tried to block it out of my consciousness.....Thank you for the renewed mental trauma.
The worst thing is it got made!!!!!
The worst thing about this movie? That it was greenlit.
The book, while only an okay sci fi romp, at least has far, far, fewer plot holes. Many of the plot idocy in the movie is either not present or explained in the book. For example in the book fort knox was on of the first places the invaders went for gold and the gold jhony uses is some he found in an old and irradiated armored truck that got burred in rubble.
Furthermore, at 1000 pages long the book can also be used as body armor.
One of the worst movies I have ever seen in my entire life.
The tragedy is....the book was one of the best Sci-Fi stories I've ever read
Obviously the Cyclos’ civilization has declined considerably in the last 1000 years.
Wasn't this supposed to be a movie about earth's past? Is this Scientology's version of Judgment Day?
Any chance to do a review on:
Pontypool (www.imdb.com/title/tt1226681/)
Splinter(www.imdb.com/title/tt1031280/)
Galaxy of Horrors (www.imdb.com/title/tt6188002/)
Is that Kelly Preston with the long tongue ?
Yup.
Legend has it that Tom Cruise went to the studio that was making Battlefield Earth and advised them not to.
careful Robin.... thats how "they" get you, true story?!?!
Mmmmm, that alien Woman has a talented tongue. Maybe one of the Humans will teach her how to French Kiss. oops maybe the aliens killed off all the French people in the future.
Yes this is "The laughing stock of the Universe. " It always, always annoys me to no end how in alien movies, the aliens speak with our slang and phrases, that are part of our language and not theirs.
This is the best movie ever made by man-animals
I think John Travolta And The rest of The Cast were High When this film Was being made
I struggled to watch this film on the telly. Glad I only wasted time and brain cells on it rather than any cash.
Incidentally, the financing of the film turned out to be fraudulent. A German investor forked out a particular percentage of the budget... only it turned out they were told a massively inflated figure.
Uwe Boll? :P
I struggled through it on tv. Only good thing about it was Forrest Whittiker.
The worst thing about this movie is that it got made.
My friend unironically loves this movie. He thinks the special effects are great and that the story is good.
Personally, I think it's absolute garbage.
Was your friend dropped on his head as an infant?
What's the worst thing about this film?
That someone spent money to make it.
How long it is.
Worse thing is that after the initial adjustment to how stupid it is . It's Boring.
it followed the book too closely; this is one time to deviate from the original text.
It's hard to think of a dumber villain in cinematic history than Terl... maybe Richard Lynch's bad guy in The Barbarians who forgot he didn't have a trigger finger and thus couldn't shoot his enemies with a crossbow.
The 2 goons in 101 Dalmatians.
They couldn't succeed at killing freakin puppies, the puppies did escape because of using something to alter color of their fur that fooled them, also they were responsible for crashing into Cruela Devil's car.
Last Action Hero
The main Villain wastes time talking about he can snap his fingers using the ticket with Hannibal Lector, Freddy Krueger, and other movie villains, and is killed.
Under Siege
Stranix tells Ryback about where the missiles are going, shows he has the key and does get close enough for Ryback to knock the gun out of his hand and in a knife fight Ryback easily defeats him along with uses overkill.
Ryback is able to use the key and detonate both missiles after getting the launch codes.
So that's 3 major freakin mistakes by a Mastermind Terrorist Leader that was 10 minutes ahead of schedule for taking over a US Navy Ship..
Richie Rich
Wow so a guy is smart enough to take over a Big Business Company but doesn't see the futility that Richie is wearing a bulletresistant vest instead of doing the sensible thing shoot his head not protected he continues to waste bullets shooting the protected area.
That is 1 damn astounding failure.
Yogai. Yoma.
3rd worst: the dialogue
2nd worst: the makeup
Worst Worst: Travolta's campy "acting"!
It doesn't even qualify for a so-bad-it's-good statis. It's pretty dull if you watch it in its entirety. The shifting dutch angles get very tedious after a while and the acting is just not as campy as it should be. I imagine that for a devoted Scientologist like Travolta that this was to be homage to his dear leader LRH. I've read mixed reviews about the book itself, some I imagine are from Scientology followers. I've watched it once out of curiosity to see if it was as bad as some have said. It's dreadful. It makes Ed Wood's Plan 9 From Outer Space look like a masterpiece in comparison. Battlefield Earth takes itself far too seriously given its very silly premise. It is fun to watch select clips but a Herculean effort to actually sit through. There is a book titled Iron Dream by Norman Spinrad which has Hitler as a science fiction author writing a book within a book but filled with the Nazi ideologies he espoused in real life. Having read none of the LRH books in the series I wonder if they contain any propaganda buried under the sci-fi surface.
What's the worst thing about this movie? That it exists, and wasn't cut up into mandolin picks.
Battlefield Earth is one notch above the Star Wars Saga.....
.....and I'm talking through my Asss!!!!
I loved the book just a pity about the movie.
The worst thing about this movie?? Is that they ever actually thought it was good enough to release in theaters!!! What an absolute embarrassment!!!! Shitty story, weak unbelievable plot, zero character development, horrible special effects, awful sets, terrible acting........I could go on & on. I remember thinking that the effects would’ve been impressive had it been released in the late 70’s early 80’s. & I’m not exaggerating at all!!!!!!
...not enough Bee Gees?
Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha!
What's the worse thing about this movie? That I spent good money on seeing it.There's bunch of Scientolgists that owe me ten bucks and hour and a half of my life.
You should've kept the Dutch angle on your video, just to see how many people would've noticed 😁
What happened to this week's horror smackdown?
life got very busy and it did not get edited on time. it will be out very soon and then we will be back on track.
The creation of the magnum opus, SHARKNADO: UNDERSTANDING ITS MYSTICAL MESSAGE ABOUT THE MEANING OF LIFE, is now consuming inordinate amounts of time.
Oy gevalt.
This movie was horrible but did well at the Box Office. The power of Scientology.
You forgot to mention the annoying, rotating color-filters. Ugh
Ba ba ba, ba ba Baririno
HUH???
We dident he do a dance contest in the movie? Disappointed....
John Travolta?
the most asinine movie in existence