24 Regrets of People Who Are Dying - Matthew Kelly
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- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- Don't Waste Your Life
24 Regrets of People Who Are Dying - Matthew Kelly
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Video Transcript:
What do people regret when they are dying? I asked hospice nurses. Here are the regrets people have when they are dying.
• I wish I’d had the courage to just be myself.
• I wish I had spent more time with the people I love.
• I wish I had made spirituality more of a priority.
• I wish I hadn’t spent so much time working.
• I wish I had discovered my purpose earlier.
• I wish I had learned to express my feelings more.
• I wish I hadn’t spent so much time worrying about things that never happened.
• I wish I had taken more risks.
• I wish I had cared less about what other people thought.
• I wish I had realized earlier that happiness is a choice.
• I wish I had loved more.
• I wish I had taken better care of myself.
• I wish I had been a better spouse.
• I wish I had paid less attention to other people’s expectations.
• I wish I had quit my job and found something I really enjoyed doing.
• I wish I had stayed in touch with old friends.
• I wish I had spoken my mind more.
• I wish I hadn’t spent so much time chasing the wrong things.
• I wish I’d had more children.
• I wish I had touched more lives.
• I wish I had thought about life’s big question earlier.
• I wish I had traveled more.
• I wish I had lived more in the moment.
• I wish I had pursued more of my dreams.
These are the regrets of people who were out of time. Some people think it’s morbid to think about death. I disagree. It’s healthy to think about death. It puts things in perspective and reminds us what really matters. The inevitability of death should inspire us to get busy living."
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Straight and to the point. Not 27 minutes long, not padded with stupid ads. Thank you, good sir, kind sir.
One regret is not to be long winded and waste time
@@charles-y2z6c HAHAHAHAH
Rare to find this nowadays.
100% right👌
Yes! Concise and to the point. Thank you!
1. I wish I had the courage to be myself.
2. I wish I had spent more time with the people I love.
3. I wish I had made spirituality more of a priority.
4. I wish I hadn't spent so much time working.
5. I wish I had discovered my purpose earlier.
6. I wish I had learned to express my feelings more.
7. I wish I hadn't spent so much time worrying about something that would not going to happen.
8. I wish I had taken more risks.
9. I wish I had cared less about how other people thought.
10. I wish I had realized earlier that happiness is a choice.
11. I wish I had loved more.
12. I wish I had taken better care of myself.
13. I wish I had been a better spouse.
14. I wish I had paid less attention to other people's expextations.
15. I wish I had quit my jobs and found something I trully enjoyed doing.
16. I wish I had stayed in touch with old friends.
17. I wish I had spoken my mind more.
18. I wish I hadn't spent so much time chasing the wrong things.
19. I wish I had more children.
20. I wish I had touched more lives.
21. I wish I had thought about life's big question earlier.
22. I wish I had travelled more.
23. I wish I had lived more in the moment.
24. I wish I had pursued more of my dreams.
Thx
Who. Asked?
@jakeschwartz2514 I did
@@jakeschwartz2514quiet kid
@@digitform2832😂😂😂😂
Most of the regrets stem from failing to have courage. Fear is not your friend.
Sometimes Fear is a friend who's misunderstood
@@mrdeep6406They say "perfect love cast out all fear", if so, there is no misunderstanding that fear is the ultimate goal of humanity to destroy, forever.
Exactly!
The list is biased since it does not include anyone who died from cliff diving 😂
@@mrdeep6406ok there John mayer
I wish I'd taken more risks.
I wish I'd taken better care of myself.
I wish I'd travelled more.
I wish I'd lived more in the moment.
Nothing is guaranteed
@@mrSbig20 Death and taxes are.
I wish I understood why it is so difficult to conquer daily fear & laziness.
@@MR-backupit's never easy and that's the beauty of it,to look back and think proudly of what you have achieved despite the difficulties you faced but until then you do that,you struggle for your purpose and remain with a smile on your face thinking about how much you wanna change your situation for the better. I say that because I am in the exact same spot and I think I have finally realized that the beauty of living is found in action and improvement of yourself
@@MR-backup It's because we are literally beings made up of TRILLIONS of other smaller beings, who are themselves made up of TRILLIONS of bits of data contained in DNA, which is all just REPITITIONS AND PATTERNS of behavior. That's our unconscious mind, and it's stronger than the conscious mind. The only way to overcome it is to realize that you are redirecting a TRAIN.
You cannot redirect a train through brute force.
All of these regrets have one core: courage and constant overcoming of fear/anxiety to do or be something. COURAGE PEOPLE! Be strong and assertive.
Interekweb
I might be wrong but I think Courage has nothing to do with being assertive. it’s an inner quality that doesn’t depend on being more than someone else- as assertive’ implies.
@@janel342 Thank you
We always regret not doing something rather than doing something and regretting later. Lifes too short to worry about the result so we should just focus on the journey instead❤
"I wish I had the courage to be myself" hits hard as I'm always scared of what other people think of me. And I believe therefore never truly lived in the moment and enjoyed the wonderful and extremely privileged life I have. Also, I believe because I'm so scared to be myself and to be rejected, I havent met the woman of my life either.
And the reply to that should be: "Wish all you want, but you ain't getting it". At that stage, a person might as well just keep their mouth clammed up, because anything they say will be useless and only make them look weaker.
@@BlueSkyCountry explain
I recommend you to read the book psycho-cybernetics from Maxwell Maltz. Its a wonderful book and the principles laid there can definitely help you with what you are struggling right now
Notice how all of these are around "I" and "me" and people wanting stuff for themselves and themselves experiencing different things throughout life they didn't earlier. There is basically not one out of these 24 regrets that is focused on others and treating others better. The only one is "I wish I was a better partner", but notice how no one said "I wish I was a better parent l". No one regrets how they treated others, especially their kids. No one care about that...
great observation. I love minds such as yours who are courteous
Because they might not know about the day of judgement
The second important thing in life is giving everyone their rights
One that I do disagree with is that happiness is a choice. I’ve been horribly depressed for over 15 years now. But I can’t just flip a switch and decide to be happy. Any more than I can pop some pill and solve it. There are specific reasons why I’m not happy. Like not having a decent job or not having a loving relationship with someone. I try and try to fix those things, but I’ve just been unsuccessful. But I’m not going to lie to myself and put on an artificial smile when it’s not how I truly feel.
I just said a small prayer for you. One step at a time.
The end quote is the same wisdom from Virgil nearly 2000 years ago:
“Death twitches my ear;
'Live,' he says...
'I'm coming.”
That we are still struggling with the same issue all this time later, shows how hard the self-limiting mindset is to overcome.
The debt that all men pay.
There's not much we should regret in this world except not trying to be as kind and honest as we can be. We just like to believe there's something we could've done differently, but most things were and are outside of our control.
A salary from a company to a subordinate is the number one reason why most of the items on this list exists. A salary is the fix needed to survive and living check to check brings fear of keeping most boxed in and trapped their whole lives.
" • I wish I’d had the courage to just be myself. " Never ever forget this lesson folks!!
I am a monk and I can confirm that I live a life that fulfils all these desires 🙌🏻
Don't wait till you're 70 to feel it's safe enough to take risks
And here I am thinking of how much I’m losing on Tesla @ $195. I need a good nights rest. And call some loved ones in the morning. Reach out, get out of my head, and think of others. ❤
I know watching this video is going to be one of the regrets but not watching will be a regret as well. The problem isn't doing something or not doing it. The problem is feeling regret. Live with what you have in your own way.
This is beautiful Matthew! I've copied the video transcript and am going to place it in the high school graduation cards of my niece and nephew. Thank you for sharing.
Motivational stuff like these useless quotes on yuppie mugs and those annoying framed "motivational" memes thaf every corporate office has in their hallways are so cringe and pathetic.
Been taking care of mom for 10 years since step father died. She can't walk anymore so I had to put her in a nursing home. I go every day sometimes twice because the facility is close and I want them to know I am not that son who dumps them and runs, they know I work on her care right beside them. You ever spend anytime in a nursing home, go and you will not need to experience death to get an awakening to life. The smell alone, I smell it when I am not there it gets in your clothes and in your head. My heart breaks for the poor souls who have nobody to visit them. I spent the first month sitting in my truck in the parking lot or my driveway when I got home crying my eyes out. I'm sure my neighbors thought I was losing my mind. I have no family of my own, no wife no kids no nothing. But I'll be goddamned if I'll ever live another second afraid of losing my job or afraid of what's around the corner. Don't give a damn if women think I'm attractive or co-workers think I'm smart or funny. I don't need your company or approval all I need is a clear conscience when that pretty little skinny ass country girl is gone knowing I did my duty as a son. I'm my own man and I will not sweat the bullshit ever again. I made the decision to appreciate life and every day above ground and be grateful for my good health.
👍
I loved your message @troybuchanan9980 very raw and honest. Hope you're doing ok since you've written your post. Can I become your friend seriously?
Can I become your friend @troybuchanan9980?
You’re good man
This just proves that we are all in our own heads
When I passed away 2 months ago, I had most of those regrets.
My greatest regret is trusting others and not taking that job offer across the country and left everyine behind.
Thank you for the Wisdom today Matthew - Happiness is a choice
Ive never once heard people ever saying they wished they worked harder.
The tricky thing about these things is that you can't truly, 100%, relate to them until you have built empathy around it. And the only way to truly have empathy is to go through it. And to truly go through it...
I had a friend share with me the other day that he can better connect with me now that he has kids, before that it's just a concept. That feels like the constraint and the reality of our lives in this form.
"And I saw the dead, small and great, standing before God, and books were opened. And another book was opened, which is the Book of Life.
And the dead were judged according to their works, by the things which were written in the books.
The sea gave up the dead who were in it, and Death and Hades delivered up the dead who were in them. And they were judged, each one according to his works.
Then Death and Hades were cast into the lake of fire. This is the second death. And anyone not found written in the Book of Life was cast into the lake of fire." (REVELATION 20:12-15 NKJV)
Today, while you are still alive and able, may you repent from your sins, believe in your heart and confess with your mouth that JESUS CHRIST is your Lord and Savior, so that through Him, your name will be written in the Book of Life.
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever BELIEVES in Him
should not perish but have everlasting life.
For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved." (JOHN 3:16-17 NKJV)
✝️ By God's GRACE, the gift of Salvation and Eternal Life is available to all. You can RECEIVE it. You can REJECT it. May you choose wisely...
That felt like a lifetime. Feels great finding this video earlier. Great job. Thanks ❤️
You rarely hear anyone express regret for doing something even if it was a big mustake . Regrets in old age are more about what you didn't do.
Thanks for having the transcript of the wishes in the description. I wanted to take a printout and stick it near my desk. Appreciate your work 🙏
I agree. Get busy living, enjoying, loving & just forgive.
Especially be kind & loving to yourself.
I wish I hadn't taken way too much of life so seriously. I wish I had, had more laughter in my life.
I'll save this vid and play it often...
Thank you Matthew Kelly.
It's better to try and fail than fail to try.
The world is built to keep you scared
My biggest regret is all the time I've wasted having regrets We don't have time machines so just gotta let that shyt go!
I love your video. Short but sweet. Great work, very deep and profound.
"I wish I had found my purpose in life earlier." I am in my mid 50s, am still searching for that.
Same here . Working on it everyday. We are still in the game . Keep pushing young warrior
Outside of worrying too much, I don't have any of those regrets. But that doesn't insure happiness. Life can still be a struggle. But most things are almost never as bad as you think they are in those low moments.
My Dad passing at 56 really changed the way I went about things. I will pass with few regrets.
I’m nearly 50. I wish I had a good loving relationship like I had before. That’s the number one thing
I regret not spending more time arguing with people on the internet
We're all dying, some just faster than others.
Thank you for this. I hope to share with the people in my life
No matter what most people will regret something
Absolutely love ur straight to the point video. Amazing. U didn’t waste any time.
At the end of the day, we simply can't do EVERYTHING. So that's why it's important to prioritise and do the things over which you have some control and influence. For the things you can't control or bring about in your time, make peace with that and be grateful for what you did have. Although determination and persistence is good and there's nothing wrong with striving for all your heart desires, sometimes life has plans for you, and will throw obstacles in front of you... that's just life.
I don't focus on the regrets as it's spilled milk and focusing on them ironically just gets in the way of being happy. Which of course just creates more regret. Accept life for what it is, keep it simple and don't look back.
Collect memories instead of things.
Spend time with friends & family.❤️
I think what's really interesting is that alot of these are due to different paths in life. The one who wished they wouldn't have worked as hard have lived the imagined life of the one who wish they had taken more risks. And vice versa. There is a price and a outcome. Live in the now and appreciate what you have and do what you feel is important to you. All love
Whatever regrets he said right now is the same thing that I feel I lack right now……
Been doing it for years! Back when I was 35 I started asking why the fuck am I here. Studied different spiritual texts and realized exactly what he’s saying. Took a few years for my mind to evolve but I haven’t looked back since. Been able to pursue my dreams to the fullest extent possible with my life responsibilities. I’m very thankful for what life has given me and hope to be in the future as well. Peace and good luck. And yes ppl need to think more about their deaths. In fact think every day and remind yourselves every day, have a ticking time bomb in the head that this moment has just passed , what will you do next? Tick, tock, tick, tock…
Love this video, very deep and thought provoking,
Work stops a lot of what you want to do because you spend more time working than anything els. It’s a shame really because we all need a better work life balance but we all need money to live as well, it’s genuinely very difficult, just live your life the best you can and don’t be angry or bitter just try and enjoy life as you don’t know when your last day will be. 👍
“Take more risks….” NO THANKS! I’m in my 50’s, and thus far, the risks I have taken have always backfired on me. No more! I’m better off living a life of absolute mediocrity - where I don’t do bad things, but I won’t go out of my way, either, at being some hero.
Definitely one of the biggest is spending way too much of your mental life in the past or in the future, instead of in the present.
something i learned from howl's moving castle, love is probably the best purpose in life
Need this bad, thank you already 🙏🏻
Thank you. Inspirational snd helpful!
I actully appreciate That i see this video today,Make me realise that i am spending my day,worrying about something that never gonna actully happen.. anxiety can be controlled because I want too change the situation. Tysm❤
Thank you so much Sir ❤
I guess you found something that you really love doing, sir! I am still searching.
I needed to see this today.
Sweet, I do all these things already
The key in life is never live in regret. Live your life and accept your life. Don’t regret anything, it never solves anything and just makes you sad or depressed or outcomes!
Ecclesiastes 7:2-3 New Century Version (NCV)It is better to go to a funeral than to a party. We all must die, and everyone living should think about this. Sorrow is better than laughter, and sadness has a good influence on you.
Courage to live authentically is fantastic! Thanks for sharing, Matthew.
Really helps a lot, gonna take those risks alright 😊
You concluded it all in 1 clip in short and precise way.
I love it. Please keep up this content. I appreciate it!
This video is profoundly moving and insightful! 🌟 Have you ever wondered what people regret most as they approach the end of their lives? Matthew Kelly shares 24 regrets that can teach us invaluable lessons about how to live more fully and meaningfully. A must-watch for anyone who wants to avoid these common regrets and live with no regrets! 🕊
One can make a list of affirmations out of these regrets, they just need to be adjusted a little.
Failure is better than regret
I would say trying to help and change people for the better is a waste of time. They usually just revert back to their old habits and selves.
Well said . True that .
get closer to people who’re dying and you’ll be getting closer to wisdom.
I realised this all at 21 🥰
My biggest regret was messing up and letting the woman who has my heart walk out my life I had the chance to be with someone who I was truly in love with 15 years later and it still hurts wish I had the opportunity to go back in time 😢
straight to the point
I really appreciate the short length of this video, thank you for this 🙏
thank you for this 🙏
Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying
That's goddamn right.
As someone with depression I find this patronising
If wishes were horses beggers would ride.
Exactly. That's why people need to act on these death-bed wishes in the present so they don't end up wishing when it is too late.
Indeed they would
@@kentd4762there is no regret after death. Regrets are just for the living when they feel it is too late.
thanks for that :) short and on the point
Everyone have regret, we are not no perfect untill death
I regret watching this video
Beautiful!
I fortunately woke up a long time ago and do nearly all of these things (besides travel, stay close to friends as I am content alone, and take more risks- I am ok with my low level of risk taking, but this could one day bother me).
I have a lot of trouble with these two things which cause me a lot of misery in my life: worrying about things that never happen, and not living in the moment. These two issues cause me a lot of pain, and I have worked on these things for years but I’ve made only a little progress. I think about these two things nearly every day, and it certainly does get in the way of living in the moment. I worry and worry about stuff that doesn’t happen, or isn’t even a big deal.
I wish I have the priviledge to not regret all of this right now 😟
Most of these things are hindsight 20/20 that you can only say when you are actually dying.
Wow...Awesome..Thank you Sir...
A few years later, one more thing will be added to the list, that is "I wish I spent less time using my phone & did something valueable"
🎯
I just liked your comment with my stupid phone. I'm a hypocrite. Proud hypocrite. I'm smiling now. Gonna turn off RUclips and do something useful. Yep. Any second now. You'd better believe it. Gonna happen. Pretty much very soon...ish.
Haha!!! @super7ace that’s the spirit soldier! Get out & about, do things, anything, keep moving 👍
And yet you're on your phone right now writing this comment. Oh the irony.....
@@SaL-ep7zbIt's not ironical if he understands that he is part of the people who's going to have that regre
Thank you for this
I really like the quote I once heard "fear doesn't prevent death, fear prevents life"
♥️♥️♥️
fear does prevent death in certain condition but yeah it makes senses too
That’s god damn deep
❤❤❤
how do you explain the day I didn't jumped off a cliff because I was afraid?
Notice how all of the regrets are individualistic and matter to the person who is dying! In the real life we tend to worry more about others until we realize it’s just you. It’s always been you. Until the end
One of the greatest comments I have ever read on RUclips. Thanks a lot for that!
It is always about perception. You decide how to perceive your life. It doesn’t matter what anybody thinks of you. Their thoughts about you don’t matter in the slightest. It’s about you and always will. Very well said.
@@Stefan-wi1mvGlad it resonated with you. I’ll keep reminding myself the same thing over and over again.
the truth is though, we dont want to live on our own. we are social so it kind of does matter what people think to an extent
Yes but that's the fulfilled life. You before me. Others first. You don't want a selfish existence just thinking of you. That's wrong and fruitless.
@@garyg7549 wrong. It’s always me first. By putting yourself first you’ll become a better man and anyone around you is going to appreciate and benefit from what you become. Being selfish is most selfless thing you can be
I almost fell off a cliff once.
My life flashed in my mind, much like in the movies. Memories flashed from that point back to when I was a child. They seemed to be the most meaningful scenes from my life. I can’t remember most of them but some were just me playing legos with my brother as a kid, hanging out with my friends, and several were of me bending down to pet the various pets I had throughout my life.
It wasn’t memories of when I got hired for jobs, or got raises, or graduated, or shit like that.
I think about this more and more nowadays. I don’t want to have to be on death’s door again to have perspective.
Wow. Thank you for sharing.
I've thought a lot about how much of what we (I?) dream / desire is visualized in the 3rd person...but I live my life in 1st person. And (until I realized this) I didn't visualize things I wanted the way I'd actually experience them, in the 1st person.
The thought of bending down to pet your pets...that reminds me of that. And it's a sweet moment where it's just you and the animal, sharing a connection.
@@nickdeacon I don’t think I’ve ever thought of that before. That’s a very good observation.
In dreams, even if I can tell each of the characters is a manifestation of my subconscious, there’s still always one character I inhabit more than the others, seeing from their eyes in 1st person. I suppose personifications in the psyche viewed from the 3rd person are considered “distant” to the self; distant to the ego, perhaps.
There’s probably a lot of potential depth there to be explored.
This comment needs to be on the top
Pure gold.
Comment Screenshot
My father always said "you will never hear anyone on their death bed say i wish i had of worked more".
I have often heard that said and I have changed my mind .
A lot of people have too much time on their hands and should have worked harder .It would give them a sense of purpose instead of complaining all the time.
But there are a lot of homeless people who died of hunger or disease on the street because they don't have money because they don't have a job. No one will hear their complaints because no one needs them. Do you think we're just working for fun? If you paid me money for nothing, I wouldn't work, but just enjoy life. Unfortunately, smart guys like you only get smart, but they don't solve the real world problems.
@SERG__ZV
Calm down petal, I said work more, I do a 50 hour week. That's already too much. All I'm saying is don't work your life away for someone else at the loss to your family. I am NOT saying don't work.
Dear God almighty, I thought everyone could have worked that out without me having to explain it 🙄
agreed
Dang, I wish I had seen that one movie on a BIGGER TV! *croaks*
“The inevitability of death should inspire us to get busy living “. Wow! 🙌🏻🙏👍👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Sounds like a part quote from The Shawshank Redemption 😂😂😂 I
What is it we do when we are living? Is it riding a bull, jumping out of a plain.
In the western worlds do we tend to ignore death. It falls under ignorance is bliss. The Buddhists on the other hand says that we should think regularly about our death. That is how you get the north star in your life. In other words, what you should be doing with your life.
Memento mori
It should also inspire us to progress the research of biological aging reversal and longevity escape velocity. We have to occupy our time with some kind of purpose/work, so why not make the purpose one that actually could give a great outcome.
" I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, most of which never happened. " - Mark twain
So inspiring, thanks! This is the one "regret" that speaks most to me. Less work, more traveling, more dreams I'm already doing. But I worry about stuff, I worry about the future... And I'm sure that a lot of worries would not materialize themselves. Yet I still worry...
" Live such a life that even the undertaker will be sad to hear of your passing." ~ Mark Twain.
As someone who suffers with extreme severe anxiety I can totally relate to her. I would stop eating for days at a time as a punishment. I worry a lot about my life, everyone around me and pleasing everyone. It's absolutely crippling, so glad she got the help she needed, lovely young lady it's so sad that society has 1 in 3 people suffering mental health issues. I hope everyone seeks help
People need to realise that people with anxiety disorders have oversensitised nerves, it's not a simple case of manning up and getting over it.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about how mushrooms and psychedelics treats anxiety, but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, doctor Greg mushroom I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
Please, how do I reach doctor Greg?
Is he on the internet?
The list they said:
They regret not being themselves,
not spending more time with people,
not being more spiritual,
working too much,
not looking into discovering their purpose,
not expressing feelings,
wasted time worrying,
didn't take more risks,
wish they cared less about what others thought,
know that happiness is a choice,
wish they loved more,
took care of themselves better,
were a better spouse,
paid less attention to other's expectations,
wish they had quit their job and done what they loved,
Wish they kept in touch with friends,
spoke their mind more,
felt they were chasing the wrong things,
wish they had more kids,
wish they touched lives,
wish they thought about the "big questions",
wish they traveled more,
wish they lived more in the moment,
and wish they pursued their dreams.
Thanks
thank you you so much!!!
very good
Thanks 🙏🏾
If I was a scientist I would wish to gather data about the people that make lists in youtube comments.
When you’re young, you care so much what others think of you.
When you get older, you care less what others think of you.
And when you are old, you realize no one was ever thinking of you at all. (They were too wrapped up in what others thought of _them.)_
I heard that once, and it stuck with me ever since. The moral of the story is live the life you want and don’t worry what others are thinking of you...
Because they’re probably not anyway.
As you get older you realise that those you tried to impress were not even worthy of your time.
I am sure there are ppl who think about you. Namely your loved ones and your enemies.
@@maxsheng8215 _of course,_ lol. We’re not dead 🙈
No, what is meant by “no one is thinking of you” is _no one that matters_ is thinking _unkindly_ about you. So be free.
No one that matters (like loved ones) is going to be purposefully critically cruel regarding what your goals/dreams are in life, so you should not live in fear of what they think. Anyone that matters (like loved ones) will take care to encourage you and build you up and spur you onward.
Anyone that _doesn’t matter_ (like your enemies) truly _doesn’t_ matter... because they’re your enemies and their opinion never mattered in the first place 😉 so it’s even less of a reason to live your life concerned with what they think of you when/if they do at all.
(And even so with both parties still, thoughts will be fleeting because, try as we might, we all tend to focus on self the most.)
@@In_timeRight . as a grown up, you are responsible for your own life. As a child, what your parents think of you and your goals do matter, and they could positively or negatively affect your decision making.
I don't have any of these regrets. I left behind childhood friends. They have their own troubles and responsibilities. Not interested in chasing a dream or passion, and spirituality is an empty cup for me. I stopped worrying what others thought of me long ago. My main concern is just to have fun, exercise, and keep working until retirement.