The history of dating is an interesting and varied one. What are your thoughts on the future of dating? Let us know in the comments below. If you like this film be sure to subscribe to our channel and turn on notifications.
A deregulated sexual and romantic marketplace or tournament style dating has several long term consequences. Sure casual dating and casual sex offers freedom of choice but it is not a solution to creating long term pair-bonding and healthy families.
Synthetic love availability will probably lead to people being more patient in choosing partners and so having more time to heal between relationships and in other varied contexts. This isnt a personal interest so much as an extrapolation in counterfactual form. I wouldn't be surprised if, thanks to the advent of life extension, the concept of marriage for life fell off except in extreme or special cases. Most having understood the history of dating and been through divorce by the age of 100. The development of medical technology to the point of removing and virul or bacterial infection at a 1:1 ratio may render the population hedonistic to a T which may lead down a path to either greater general animal mindsets or a general dismissal of the relevance of sexuality to love.
The problem with dating nowadays its that we still believe we have to find "the love of your life" and it must have all the Disney qualities of a prince or a princess wich is stupid. Even when we think consciously that that is a naive idea, we have been trained for so many years to think like that and we do it subconsciously. Thanks to that idea we live in constant dispair and dissapointment when we realize no one checks all our expectations. And when we felt they do fulfill our unrealistic expectations, the feeling vanishes after 6-12 months. Because "romantic love" is just the instrument that the will of species use to manipulate individuals to procreate as Schopenhauer pointed out and know is scientifically proven that we literaly get a pump of dopamine that only last certain period of time when we are "in love". So my advice to make dating less frustrating is reduce your expectations, be curious about what the person is instead of judging them for what they are not but they "should" be. Also seek someone who has similar passions, humor, character and hobbies than you. Those are the things that are left over after the drug period. It is more like searching a good friend. And stop forcing relationships thinking it should last forever or longer. If it doesnt work just doesnt work. Nobody has a real special one, so dont feel bad about breaking up with someone!
@@sujeyocegueda3930 Of course, Sujey. Same sex couples also drive by sexual feeling (instinct) as well in beginning; we all do. Romantic love is the feeling that we seek that make us feel like we have a place we belong too. This is what needpit1 and even video suggested, instinct is a good starting mechanism however as a creature of ever ending desires, we will crave for more than just instinct; i.e. passions, humor, character and hobbies in other words support. The foundation of who we are and what we will become is what make a couple work; physically procreate is nothing more than by product that come along with human expectation. Sorry I rambling on. :)
Loved the lack of music background in this video. I appreciate the voice of the wonderful Alain, and I was able to follow the story much much better. Also the graphics and animations impecable ✨✨✨✨👍🏼 and Omg 2075? God have mercy
I believe that western societies went from an extreme to another extreme. Going from reason over feelings to feelings over reason (especially physical attractiveness). I think that it's better to have a middle ground for relationships to last. Parents should guide us but not control us, and we really should never rely only on physical attractiveness. We should get to know a person for who they are before making any decision. Furthermore, when it finally comes to making a decision, we need to use our brain in addition to our heart and not just follow our heart blindly. Also, getting advice from others is important and I believe the best ones to get advice from are our parents. It's just my opinion in the end so... Do whatever dafuq you wanna do!
While going from one extreme to another isn't the best, I don't think there should be too many social rules about dating/relationships. It's up for the people in the relationship to do as they see fit
He also brushed off to where the status and money stopped being important only for the females, Male suitors still have to equate or surpass the female's current status.
Aaron Well said, either ethnostates will emerge in the west or Islam will take over. This degeneracy of the modern west will collapse from its weak pillars.
Most girls feel that marriage as such a drag as they're enjoying their free, wild spirit and "testing" the market and enjoying themselves without responsibility. But as soon as they see a colleague or mutual friend get engaged on facebook/instagram, they immediately feel left out and envious. Funny how that works eh?
Spoiler, Arthur and Catherine of Aragon never got married. Long engagements, aye? She married his little brother Henry instead, and I haven't finished reading about their marriage, but they have a beautiful, sane baby girl and I guess they live happily ever after.
Well, in my culture your husband is still chosen by your family, or at least should be accepted by them. Moreover, it is often important to understand whether they come from a good family. This history is mostly based on the 'western' world. Dating isn't something common in many countries across the world.
1. Once I was playing chess with a friend of mine who is an excelllent chess player. I was used to always losing when we played but I still loved it! One day, just before he only had to make a few moves to win, he said " because today is your birthday, we can turn the board at this point. So you'll get my position and hopefully win this time". What a gentleman! He offered me all those figures in the best possible position, but since I wasn't a good player, I didn't know what to do with them and once again I have lost! Well there is a life lesson in there too. I would be very happy for the people in the future, if they could so easily find the perfect partners for themselves, but if they don't get the necessary emotional education, I am afraid they will still fail. 2. Since there is a lesson about almost anything on this wonderful channel, the video called " On finding the right one" explains this much better! 3. And I am sure, even a hundred years from now, the following podcast episode with Alain de Botton ( the founder of this channel ) will help many people: " On Being with Krista Tippett, The True Hard Work of Love and Relationships" 4. There is a wonderful movie called " Her" that gave me a lot to think about...I never thought that a movie about a man who falls in love with a software would move me to tears. I highly recommend it! 5. And there is a very interesting Hidden Brain podcast about the history of marriage. It is called: " When Did Marraige Become So Hard". You can also complement it with another episode: "The Lonely American Man". 6. Friends who want to know about technology and divorce, the following podcast episode may help you to get divorced less painfully: " Note to Self . Wevorce: What Divorce by Algorithm Means for Marriage." Thanks a lot for this wonderful lesson. It was terribly interesting. Let's hope that everyone in a hundred years from now, will know about TSOL and they will watch all these videos as a part of their emotional education and they will suffer much less and they will be much better people than us!
The concept of the man asking the woman out for an evening is really new thing. It used to be that the man would come "calling" to the woman's house, present his card and then have tea and cakes with her while her mother hovered around. The idea of two people going out is part of the freedom that took part in the 1920s. There are no plays, novels, or literature of any kind showing "dating" before this. Just check out the plays of Wilde or Shaw. Both always relied on a "class" division among people. For that matter all the Gilbert and Sullivan musicals surround class.
Would be nicer if the videos weren't so centered on the West. I think that the Asian, Latin American, African, and the Pacific regions also have their own stories to share. Also, can't help but notice that the video overlooks the somewhat modern phenomenon of "ghosting" (or did I miss that??) because I honestly find that development very ubiquitous in modern dating. Would also be nice if it featured/highlighted , perhaps, the occurrence and prevalence of memes & celebrity statements online that help change society's viewpoints of modern dating, such as on cheating, on what age to start dating seriously, and on what age is it considered that one is mature enough to make decisions on dating. All in all, still a very good video. What more to expect from Alain and The School of Life. Much love from the Philippines!
Definitely understand the sentiment, and agree with you wholeheartedly that much can be learned from cultures outside the West. That being said, this channel (it seems to me) is more focused on creating videos surrounding the canon of western civilization, as we’ve come to understand it, from its natural evolution from Greek antiquity to now. I do believe there are other videos that focus on Chinese and Tibetan philosophers, and consider also that they are actively creating new videos, so perhaps we haven’t seen the full extent of what they plan to do in respect to eastern philosophies.!
*I think love should be BALANCE between feeling and reason. Having reason over feeling nor feeling over reason kinda bit extreme I guess* We ofc can't live without money nor social status, yet we still need to have feelings (physically n emotionally attracted) to that person, so I think finding the balance is very important. But yeah it's just my opinion, still it's up to you to do wth you wanna do in your life😄
There is no divine or intrinsic value placed on marriage these days so I think dating will become more and more pointless for those actually looking for something serious
One of the best videos of yours. And i mean that not all you make are good, but this is. And reading the comments heals my heartbreake for the growing distance that is forming between me and my beloved. I was grown in a society that telled me that love was everything: not trained to feel differently, i was ever so prone to affection and tenderness, and so to suffering whenever the beloved dropped me. But at least i can recognize that not all we have or conceive today is the best tailored solution, for anything.
Dating is a taboo in India. Is it considered as a terrible crime, especially when their children choose partners with low/high social status and castes. It is sooo much worse in India that many boys are being killed by the girls family members.
Not entirely true, urban areas especially the cities of Delhi (my home) and Bombay are quite westernized and love marriages are a common occurrence, hell even my parents have had love marriage and we are talking about 80's here. Sure there are SOME instances of the incidents the OP has said but MOSTLY killings are not as common and in bigger cities (small towns are rapidly growing bigger) they are non existent.
In 'Don Quixote', by Cervantes, there is already an episode in which he talks about the importance of love and the feeling of young people for marriage, as well as the need for parents to guarantee the mutual convenience of this union.
I'm young (20) and I date for long term commitment or to find a lifelong partner. I don't know why age is such a big deal when it comes to dating, I don't want to just have sex.
For someone with a title as "Unleashing Potential - psychology videos", you have the most pseudo-scientific comments laced with this faux intellectualism that is pretty pathetic. Your sophistication is at a level of a freshman high schooler--NOT a mature/graduate student of Psychology.
Hey SchoolOfLife! Can you please do a video about having fake friends? As in feeling paranoid about not having anyone who honestly cares for you outside of your family, feeling very alone and socially awkward even though you have certain people who you tend to hang out with...?
This is the best way to subtly let us know that we have went from valuing economical n societial thinking to using other values unknown to people centuries before us becz of the conditions around those eras priorities have really changed since we r soo advanced now
He's european, british, of course he is going to focus on the history of the continent and country he is most knowledgeable about. If you wish to see something about Africa, Asia, etc, why not make it yourself? He's western, he lives in the West, there's nothing wrong with it being focused on such.
Wasn't Romeo And Juliet written almost 200 years before Julie? And since the play features two people falling in love despite families being rivals,it shows that the idea of dating someone purely out of love had been explored before Julie.
You’ve got mail was based in NYC, not LA. In the movie, the two character wasn’t contacting each other online for purpose of dating, just friendship. However it did inevitably led to a somewhat complicated romantic relationship.
7:26 reminds me of an au i read where people have soulmates and when one's soulmate dies they get a surgery to disrupt the link they had. they ended up falling in love without it and it was really sweet.
I think that there should be a medium between the head and the heart when it comes to dating. And I believe that although many more people nowadays get divorced, that doesn’t necessarily correlate perfectly to happiness in marriage. It is much more acceptable to get a divorce now than it ever has been, which not only would make one think that people would’ve used to get divorced more had they the choice, but also that people now don’t feel the pressure to work extremely difficult problems out, because they can just leave.
All of this sounds so very unpleasant. Especially the idea of having sex before marrying, rather than testing your compatibility in other ways before committing to a lifelong relationship and having sex.
I think that even though all these social customs have an influence on our emotional vocabulary and certainly set out the rules and possibilities of even our inner understandings and workings of "love" and shared happiness (whether for a shorter period of time or a lifetime) what is true now and what has been supposedly true throughout the ages is the "meaningful encounter". Dating can be a functional activity to find a fitting partner or a romantic play, but at the core is something that is bigger than cultures and customs, namely the connection of likeminded human beings - if only for the magical moment of a brief encounter. We long to be understood and understand others, we long to connect with our surroundings, to be able to show our weak and vulnerable sides as well as be appreciated for our strong and shining selves, so an honest and fulfilling connection between two people is nothing that can be substituted. In fact, today we expect these things to be mostly shared with our partners or friends (if they are to be close to us it is them who should allow for that), whereas in theory can (and in actual, historical practice it was) fulfilled by different people ... or remained unfulfilled, pushed away to the subconscious, etc. Still, that doesn't mean that it had ever been redundant or might soon become so (people will feel nostalgic and retro and might return to it when they see that robots and gadgets aren't a true substitute for that) and dating is still a very nice and fitting area for explorations of that sort (as long as you manage to free yourself from the awkwardness or social rigidity surrounding this "institution")...
Age plays a role due to our minds developing over time. We learn from our past experiences and some make adjustments. But truth be told some never learn, also some see dating in a complete different light then others do. You can give two single fifty year olds the same dating history but both of their mindsets on the subject will be entirely different. One could be hopeless while the other could believe love is endless. There’s simply too many variables, although history has shown very repetitive charts on dating no matter the intentions.
Should have included 2018 school of life teaches about relationships, mental health and self improvement which profoundly turns the dating world around from intuition to wholeheartedness and courgae
The German title for this video says "The history of dating (but dating like dating an event)". It would fit better if it was "Die Geschichte des Datings"
You definitely took a left turn after Arthur and Katherine. I thought you'd talk about how his brother Henry VIII married her, divorced her then started on his own way of "dating."
In industrial victorian northern England young adults were expected to move out of the overcrowded slum home as soon as possible . This mean marrying whoever was available and willing . Marriage of convenience.
Hello there! If you wish, watch these three videos from this channel: 1. How to seduce someone on a date 2. How not to think on a date 3.How to seduce someone with confidence If I may add one personal advice: if the other person doesn't seem to like you for one reason or another, don't worry about it. Here is the thing: for the very thing that one person doesn't like you, somebody else will find you lovable. I had an ex who constantly complained saying that I always speak so fast and so excited. He said it would make him " nervous". But then I know people who tell me that they always feel " energised" after talking to me , because they see the very same thing as a sign of enthusiasm and joy. So the point is: just don't give too much credit to whatever that guy may think of you. Best wishes!
I'm not sure I agree. I think the biggest indicator of a happy relationship is found within the person instead of in their partner. It doesn't matter if you have the perfectly calculated person to be with if you don't love yourself and you'll sabotage things or not know how to effectively communicate. To me, the ideal is that you date and fail at a bunch of relationships until you understand yourself. Not to mention that even if you're a perfect match today, next year you could be a completely different person based on your life experiences.
"To love is to value. Only a rationally selfish man, a man of self-esteem, is capable of love - because he is the only man capable of holding firm, consistent, uncompromising, unbetrayed values. The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone." ~ Ayn Rand
The problem with modern dating isn't HOW we do it, it's why. The difference between the modern "romance based" dating and methods where family were involved is you understood that marriage was never about YOU and YOUR happiness. What we define as happiness is really just individuals who are preoccupied with their own pleasure. Pleasing others, serving the needs of others is also pleasurable but to a selfish self absorbed person, it's a torturous task to meet another's needs, to make someone else happy. That's really it in a nutshell
Marrying for love might not make u happier than marrying for money. In the latter option you are at least rich and free from the obligation of working. Love marriages are often some struggle love scenario where u are not valued and the man is always feeling insecure about his manliness cos he can't provide.
plus people sleep around too much these days. having sex with someone is not a part of 'getting to know' them. sex has high value. women need to realize this and use it as leverage in getting what they want in life.
Wow the future spin was unexpected! Great tho, and a scary proposed future that it seems we're heading too. Technology going from once being tools to constructs that will shape and dictate our lives...aahhh creepy but plausible 😮 great content as usual SOL the trip back in time was fascinating, surely marks how much we've progressed.
WTF. How do you know it's gonna be in Singapore. May. 2075. I'm so impressed. Positively. I am living in a real-life simulation based on the past isn't it? I KNEW IT.
Online dating and meeting lots of people really does ensure you will have weeded out the bad ones and ended up with someone who may meet our ultimate desires... not sure if AI will EVER be able to do that!
Moses Emmet it doesn't ensure, but it does help. There are too many factors at play for online dating to be foolproof, however I always say it's a little better than trying to connect with a stranger simply because you like his or her face. Then again, there could be qualities that we pick up on in person, subconsciously...I don't know, mating is a conundrum. I'm gonna go now lol...
If at some point they learn to translate our brains, it would be ez as fuck. But the thing is that al will have the information of every human being in the world, and whoever has that al has that information, and that's fucking scary.
The illusion of choice. On the other hand of blind dating/arranged marriage, is a plethora of choice on your screen in front of you. You are, consciously or subconsciously, in order to get to your goal, begin to categorize, compare, and segregate all your potential matches by superficial and otherwise TRIVIAL little elements that you wouldn't have done so in the real world. In the end, you sacrifice genuine human connection for an "easy means to an end", which paradoxically, can be even LESS fulfilling.
Funny, in the past our parents shaped our lives and decisions. We went in going against our parents/guardians to manage our lives until now we use technology to look for our other halves..
The history of dating is an interesting and varied one. What are your thoughts on the future of dating? Let us know in the comments below. If you like this film be sure to subscribe to our channel and turn on notifications.
A deregulated sexual and romantic marketplace or tournament style dating has several long term consequences. Sure casual dating and casual sex offers freedom of choice but it is not a solution to creating long term pair-bonding and healthy families.
Synthetic love availability will probably lead to people being more patient in choosing partners and so having more time to heal between relationships and in other varied contexts. This isnt a personal interest so much as an extrapolation in counterfactual form. I wouldn't be surprised if, thanks to the advent of life extension, the concept of marriage for life fell off except in extreme or special cases. Most having understood the history of dating and been through divorce by the age of 100. The development of medical technology to the point of removing and virul or bacterial infection at a 1:1 ratio may render the population hedonistic to a T which may lead down a path to either greater general animal mindsets or a general dismissal of the relevance of sexuality to love.
Thanks for great video btw
The School of Life with AI I was kinda hoping for a mention of love bots as potential partners. I can’t do the flesh thing any longer.
If this is how it will be in 2075 I will probably still reject it and do my own thing.
It's always fascinating to see the evolution of behaviour. What we think is perfectly normal, 20,30,100 years ago could be totally
unfathomable.
Aaron *Someone* got romantically rejected too many times! 🤣
Freedom Strider why is this number so specific
As an Arab Muslim who travels to Europe every five weeks or so, I wholeheartedly agree with you.
Freedom Strider that's I read ancient and old books to give me a voice from another age which held different values .
Monkey Bones I think he means 20 years, 30 years, or 100 years
The problem with dating nowadays its that we still believe we have to find "the love of your life" and it must have all the Disney qualities of a prince or a princess wich is stupid. Even when we think consciously that that is a naive idea, we have been trained for so many years to think like that and we do it subconsciously. Thanks to that idea we live in constant dispair and dissapointment when we realize no one checks all our expectations. And when we felt they do fulfill our unrealistic expectations, the feeling vanishes after 6-12 months. Because "romantic love" is just the instrument that the will of species use to manipulate individuals to procreate as Schopenhauer pointed out and know is scientifically proven that we literaly get a pump of dopamine that only last certain period of time when we are "in love".
So my advice to make dating less frustrating is reduce your expectations, be curious about what the person is instead of judging them for what they are not but they "should" be. Also seek someone who has similar passions, humor, character and hobbies than you. Those are the things that are left over after the drug period. It is more like searching a good friend. And stop forcing relationships thinking it should last forever or longer. If it doesnt work just doesnt work. Nobody has a real special one, so dont feel bad about breaking up with someone!
thats great advice
needpit1 would this apply to gay couples too? Due to the fact that they cannot physically procreate, what would be the intention behind romantic love?
@@sujeyocegueda3930 Of course, Sujey. Same sex couples also drive by sexual feeling (instinct) as well in beginning; we all do. Romantic love is the feeling that we seek that make us feel like we have a place we belong too. This is what needpit1 and even video suggested, instinct is a good starting mechanism however as a creature of ever ending desires, we will crave for more than just instinct; i.e. passions, humor, character and hobbies in other words support. The foundation of who we are and what we will become is what make a couple work; physically procreate is nothing more than by product that come along with human expectation. Sorry I rambling on. :)
shut up
Can’t argue with that
Loved the lack of music background in this video. I appreciate the voice of the wonderful Alain, and I was able to follow the story much much better. Also the graphics and animations impecable ✨✨✨✨👍🏼 and Omg 2075? God have mercy
Never had a dating. Don't even know what questions and what kind of conversations happens there.
Same
It’s basically a job interview. They just size you up to see if you can be a good provider.
RealKeyyy lol!
Trust me ,You don’t miss much
I've never had any kind other than online dating. It's always been miserable.
Didn’t expect the ending to see what it could be in the future, it was a nice touch well done!
I believe that western societies went from an extreme to another extreme. Going from reason over feelings to feelings over reason (especially physical attractiveness). I think that it's better to have a middle ground for relationships to last. Parents should guide us but not control us, and we really should never rely only on physical attractiveness. We should get to know a person for who they are before making any decision. Furthermore, when it finally comes to making a decision, we need to use our brain in addition to our heart and not just follow our heart blindly. Also, getting advice from others is important and I believe the best ones to get advice from are our parents.
It's just my opinion in the end so...
Do whatever dafuq you wanna do!
hodgetwins mhmmm
While going from one extreme
to another isn't the best, I don't think there should be too many social rules about dating/relationships. It's up for the people in the relationship to do as they see fit
@@azoz273 I actually agree right there.
I love how the one isn’t even a person😂
😭😂😂😂😂
Black Mirror "Hang the DJ" episode shows a little bit more about the last case from the video
Lucian Ghiță I was just thinking about that episode once the segment came up.
Yes definitely
Psycho-pass comes to mind too. And other titles in which some machine decides what is destined for individual humans.
Peace Guard *Sees Psycho-Pass* I too am a man of culture LOL
Man, I was literally searching the comments before commenting the exact same thing
You skipped over the bit where divorce became acceptable.
Abyssal86 fortunately
He also brushed off to where the status and money stopped being important only for the females, Male suitors still have to equate or surpass the female's current status.
Aaron don't overthink ...just live your life men
Aaron
Well said, either ethnostates will emerge in the west or Islam will take over. This degeneracy of the modern west will collapse from its weak pillars.
@Aaron
You started off quite well then descended into hitler speech territory.
It's so interesting how art expresses clearly ideas that were previously laying dormant in everyones subconscious. Also known as the "aha moment"
Babies getting engaged! Making all the single and looking folk feel bad 🙈
That's why we have you...to engage them in science, Katie ;)
Most girls feel that marriage as such a drag as they're enjoying their free, wild spirit and "testing" the market and enjoying themselves without responsibility.
But as soon as they see a colleague or mutual friend get engaged on facebook/instagram, they immediately feel left out and envious.
Funny how that works eh?
Spoiler, Arthur and Catherine of Aragon never got married. Long engagements, aye? She married his little brother Henry instead, and I haven't finished reading about their marriage, but they have a beautiful, sane baby girl and I guess they live happily ever after.
Science with Katie There are child prodigies in every practice lmfao
hahahaahahhahha
Well, in my culture your husband is still chosen by your family, or at least should be accepted by them. Moreover, it is often important to understand whether they come from a good family. This history is mostly based on the 'western' world. Dating isn't something common in many countries across the world.
Lucky
1. Once I was playing chess with a friend of mine who is an excelllent chess player. I was used to always losing when we played but I still loved it! One day, just before he only had to make a few moves to win, he said " because today is your birthday, we can turn the board at this point. So you'll get my position and hopefully win this time". What a gentleman! He offered me all those figures in the best possible position, but since I wasn't a good player, I didn't know what to do with them and once again I have lost!
Well there is a life lesson in there too. I would be very happy for the people in the future, if they could so easily find the perfect partners for themselves, but if they don't get the necessary emotional education, I am afraid they will still fail.
2. Since there is a lesson about almost anything on this wonderful channel, the video called " On finding the right one" explains this much better!
3. And I am sure, even a hundred years from now, the following podcast episode with Alain de Botton ( the founder of this channel ) will help many people:
" On Being with Krista Tippett, The True Hard Work of Love and Relationships"
4. There is a wonderful movie called " Her" that gave me a lot to think about...I never thought that a movie about a man who falls in love with a software would move me to tears. I highly recommend it!
5. And there is a very interesting Hidden Brain podcast about the history of marriage. It is called:
" When Did Marraige Become So Hard".
You can also complement it with another episode:
"The Lonely American Man".
6. Friends who want to know about technology and divorce, the following podcast episode may help you to get divorced less painfully:
" Note to Self . Wevorce: What Divorce by Algorithm Means for Marriage."
Thanks a lot for this wonderful lesson. It was terribly interesting. Let's hope that everyone in a hundred years from now, will know about TSOL and they will watch all these videos as a part of their emotional education and they will suffer much less and they will be much better people than us!
The concept of the man asking the woman out for an evening is really new thing. It used to be that the man would come "calling" to the woman's house, present his card and then have tea and cakes with her while her mother hovered around. The idea of two people going out is part of the freedom that took part in the 1920s. There are no plays, novels, or literature of any kind showing "dating" before this. Just check out the plays of Wilde or Shaw. Both always relied on a "class" division among people. For that matter all the Gilbert and Sullivan musicals surround class.
Would be nicer if the videos weren't so centered on the West. I think that the Asian, Latin American, African, and the Pacific regions also have their own stories to share.
Also, can't help but notice that the video overlooks the somewhat modern phenomenon of "ghosting" (or did I miss that??) because I honestly find that development very ubiquitous in modern dating. Would also be nice if it featured/highlighted , perhaps, the occurrence and prevalence of memes & celebrity statements online that help change society's viewpoints of modern dating, such as on cheating, on what age to start dating seriously, and on what age is it considered that one is mature enough to make decisions on dating.
All in all, still a very good video. What more to expect from Alain and The School of Life. Much love from the Philippines!
I agree.
Agree and similar to the west
Definitely understand the sentiment, and agree with you wholeheartedly that much can be learned from cultures outside the West.
That being said, this channel (it seems to me) is more focused on creating videos surrounding the canon of western civilization, as we’ve come to understand it, from its natural evolution from Greek antiquity to now. I do believe there are other videos that focus on Chinese and Tibetan philosophers, and consider also that they are actively creating new videos, so perhaps we haven’t seen the full extent of what they plan to do in respect to eastern philosophies.!
Be the change you want to see and start creating those videos. Personality I'm completely happy with the topics they cover in their videos.
Those people can make their own videos instead of waiting for this channel to do it for them.
*I think love should be BALANCE between feeling and reason. Having reason over feeling nor feeling over reason kinda bit extreme I guess* We ofc can't live without money nor social status, yet we still need to have feelings (physically n emotionally attracted) to that person, so I think finding the balance is very important. But yeah it's just my opinion, still it's up to you to do wth you wanna do in your life😄
I don't think dating is going anywhere good. But this video is very thought-provoking!
Maybe if women focus on selfies and makeup more instead of pulling their weight in a relationship that will help.
Thanks for always reminding me I’m alone in the morning, School of life!
There is no divine or intrinsic value placed on marriage these days so I think dating will become more and more pointless for those actually looking for something serious
I think this is the best and most relatable comment on here.
At the end of this film, this came out of my mouth un-deliberately : "wow" ! Thank you so much The School of Life !
One of the best videos of yours. And i mean that not all you make are good, but this is. And reading the comments heals my heartbreake for the growing distance that is forming between me and my beloved. I was grown in a society that telled me that love was everything: not trained to feel differently, i was ever so prone to affection and tenderness, and so to suffering whenever the beloved dropped me. But at least i can recognize that not all we have or conceive today is the best tailored solution, for anything.
Dating is a taboo in India. Is it considered as a terrible crime, especially when their children choose partners with low/high social status and castes. It is sooo much worse in India that many boys are being killed by the girls family members.
Do you know any videos/articles about that? Sounds interesting!
In 2018? Wow...
And girls are killed in "honour killings" for the same reason.
Not entirely true, urban areas especially the cities of Delhi (my home) and Bombay are quite westernized and love marriages are a common occurrence, hell even my parents have had love marriage and we are talking about 80's here. Sure there are SOME instances of the incidents the OP has said but MOSTLY killings are not as common and in bigger cities (small towns are rapidly growing bigger) they are non existent.
at least tragic...?!
In 'Don Quixote', by Cervantes, there is already an episode in which he talks about the importance of love and the feeling of young people for marriage, as well as the need for parents to guarantee the mutual convenience of this union.
I would love to hear an hour long podcast from School of Life every week. That'd be so amazing!
You forgot September 12th, 2012: tinder was launched.
While people are young most of them date for bedroom activities. When people are more mature in age, they often date to find a lifelong partner.
I'm young (20) and I date for long term commitment or to find a lifelong partner. I don't know why age is such a big deal when it comes to dating, I don't want to just have sex.
Maryam - Master of Movement how many men have you slept with? If it’s over 3 then your just like everyone else but think your different.
Thanks Captain Obvious. You say the stupidest shit on this channel. Stop fishing for views until you have something unique to say.
@@JolinHard
1 😂 kinda sad you assume that. Geez, why so bitter. I am pretty different. Sorry to hear you most likely date girls who sleep around.
For someone with a title as "Unleashing Potential - psychology videos", you have the most pseudo-scientific comments laced with this faux intellectualism that is pretty pathetic.
Your sophistication is at a level of a freshman high schooler--NOT a mature/graduate student of Psychology.
Hey SchoolOfLife! Can you please do a video about having fake friends? As in feeling paranoid about not having anyone who honestly cares for you outside of your family, feeling very alone and socially awkward even though you have certain people who you tend to hang out with...?
Hello there! I thought you may like this video: ruclips.net/video/aGedUxTAfBk/видео.html
Best wishes :- )
It's been a while since you guys posted about the history of anything, miss these.
This is the best way to subtly let us know that we have went from valuing economical n societial thinking to using other values unknown to people centuries before us becz of the conditions around those eras priorities have really changed since we r soo advanced now
A very interesting summary. You’re going to get a lot of people complaining that this is centred on the west though - again
the school of western life
He's european, british, of course he is going to focus on the history of the continent and country he is most knowledgeable about. If you wish to see something about Africa, Asia, etc, why not make it yourself? He's western, he lives in the West, there's nothing wrong with it being focused on such.
*Olive* You are totally right.
In asia it quite simillar to the west when comes to marriage. We are humans and all the same.
the more you mature the more you realize it's importance
meaning you realise that it's meaningless?
Wasn't Romeo And Juliet written almost 200 years before Julie? And since the play features two people falling in love despite families being rivals,it shows that the idea of dating someone purely out of love had been explored before Julie.
Our own primal decisions for the rest of our life should be built up, not decided in just one moment. Memories build into the passionate moments.
You’ve got mail was based in NYC, not LA. In the movie, the two character wasn’t contacting each other online for purpose of dating, just friendship. However it did inevitably led to a somewhat complicated romantic relationship.
7:26 reminds me of an au i read where people have soulmates and when one's soulmate dies they get a surgery to disrupt the link they had. they ended up falling in love without it and it was really sweet.
Great! Only 57 more years to go!
title is translated to dating in the meaning of age determination in german ("datierung")
See you all in 2075...
For real, I hate dating
I think that there should be a medium between the head and the heart when it comes to dating. And I believe that although many more people nowadays get divorced, that doesn’t necessarily correlate perfectly to happiness in marriage. It is much more acceptable to get a divorce now than it ever has been, which not only would make one think that people would’ve used to get divorced more had they the choice, but also that people now don’t feel the pressure to work extremely difficult problems out, because they can just leave.
The 'subtle' train going into the tunnel!!! Toot toot!!! LMAO
0:09 Macri Gato a la vista!!
quien es la flaca de la foto, alguien sabe?
Andrés Descalzo alguna bailarina de tango profesional seguro
Jajajaja sabía que alguien me iba a ganar lpm
I read your essay! But it’s pleasure to see this.
All of this sounds so very unpleasant. Especially the idea of having sex before marrying, rather than testing your compatibility in other ways before committing to a lifelong relationship and having sex.
Love how you guys can see into the future
This type of history seems to be located in a particular geographical place
The key is to make all the people in society good people so they can date anyone.
Amazing!!every day I watch a new one
This video highlights western dating. Eastern “dating” is very different
Yes, he didn't mention abduction or arranged marriage.
this is pretty thought provoking, thank you! especially the future view. I wonder how it‘s gonna be, very exciting!
7:57.... BARBARELLA!!! New HBO Jane Fonda docudrama is kick ass!
I think that even though all these social customs have an influence on our emotional vocabulary and certainly set out the rules and possibilities of even our inner understandings and workings of "love" and shared happiness (whether for a shorter period of time or a lifetime) what is true now and what has been supposedly true throughout the ages is the "meaningful encounter". Dating can be a functional activity to find a fitting partner or a romantic play, but at the core is something that is bigger than cultures and customs, namely the connection of likeminded human beings - if only for the magical moment of a brief encounter. We long to be understood and understand others, we long to connect with our surroundings, to be able to show our weak and vulnerable sides as well as be appreciated for our strong and shining selves, so an honest and fulfilling connection between two people is nothing that can be substituted. In fact, today we expect these things to be mostly shared with our partners or friends (if they are to be close to us it is them who should allow for that), whereas in theory can (and in actual, historical practice it was) fulfilled by different people ... or remained unfulfilled, pushed away to the subconscious, etc. Still, that doesn't mean that it had ever been redundant or might soon become so (people will feel nostalgic and retro and might return to it when they see that robots and gadgets aren't a true substitute for that) and dating is still a very nice and fitting area for explorations of that sort (as long as you manage to free yourself from the awkwardness or social rigidity surrounding this "institution")...
There was a time when loving passionately was revolutionary in itself. What a time to be an activist!
I am enlightened!! Thanx you guys are doing great job!!
Age plays a role due to our minds developing over time. We learn from our past experiences and some make adjustments. But truth be told some never learn, also some see dating in a complete different light then others do. You can give two single fifty year olds the same dating history but both of their mindsets on the subject will be entirely different. One could be hopeless while the other could believe love is endless. There’s simply too many variables, although history has shown very repetitive charts on dating no matter the intentions.
Should have included 2018 school of life teaches about relationships, mental health and self improvement which profoundly turns the dating world around from intuition to wholeheartedness and courgae
Thank you for clearing up such a crucial aspect of our lives 🙏
This video brought me in to mind the song “in the year 2525” it’s like for told future
The German title for this video says "The history of dating (but dating like dating an event)". It would fit better if it was "Die Geschichte des Datings"
You definitely took a left turn after Arthur and Katherine. I thought you'd talk about how his brother Henry VIII married her, divorced her then started on his own way of "dating."
The ending is so freaking insane 😂
omg, the 2075 is like in the goodplace how they get put with their soulmate
In industrial victorian northern England young adults were expected to move out of the overcrowded slum home as soon as possible . This mean marrying whoever was available and willing . Marriage of convenience.
Please please please school of life make a video on how to get a date or dates.Please your perspective can be very helpful
Hello there! If you wish, watch these three videos from this channel:
1. How to seduce someone on a date
2. How not to think on a date
3.How to seduce someone with confidence
If I may add one personal advice: if the other person doesn't seem to like you for one reason or another, don't worry about it. Here is the thing: for the very thing that one person doesn't like you, somebody else will find you lovable. I had an ex who constantly complained saying that I always speak so fast and so excited. He said it would make him " nervous". But then I know people who tell me that they always feel " energised" after talking to me , because they see the very same thing as a sign of enthusiasm and joy.
So the point is: just don't give too much credit to whatever that guy may think of you.
Best wishes!
Great video. Very interesting how dating has evolved
7:18 can that machine hurry up
Excellent video. Thanks
I'm not sure I agree. I think the biggest indicator of a happy relationship is found within the person instead of in their partner. It doesn't matter if you have the perfectly calculated person to be with if you don't love yourself and you'll sabotage things or not know how to effectively communicate. To me, the ideal is that you date and fail at a bunch of relationships until you understand yourself.
Not to mention that even if you're a perfect match today, next year you could be a completely different person based on your life experiences.
"To love is to value. Only a rationally selfish man, a man of self-esteem, is capable of love - because he is the only man capable of holding firm, consistent, uncompromising, unbetrayed values. The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone." ~ Ayn Rand
yeah... it's true for women too !
Ah yes! The salt shaker intro!
Reaaally cool animation and style, the ending especially was really cool, but I would have liked some music in the background!
Your voice is just perfect!
Can somebody tell me the name and artist of the painting at 1:55? It's so beautiful!
I really would like to see a Philosophy video about Erich Fromm and his "Art of Loving.It will be a very good continuation of this topic.
I love how the place that dating goes to die is Singapore
Very informative link🔗 best wishes
The problem with modern dating isn't HOW we do it, it's why. The difference between the modern "romance based" dating and methods where family were involved is you understood that marriage was never about YOU and YOUR happiness. What we define as happiness is really just individuals who are preoccupied with their own pleasure. Pleasing others, serving the needs of others is also pleasurable but to a selfish self absorbed person, it's a torturous task to meet another's needs, to make someone else happy. That's really it in a nutshell
This was very interesting! Well, what is your opinion on how dating should ideally look like in the future? Maybe you could make a video about that.
Yes I needed this got a date next week 🙏🙏🙏 thanks to our school of life overlords
Abyzou Good luck on your date ✨😍now you have an interesting video to share and talk about with that person 😅🙌🏼
Marrying for love might not make u happier than marrying for money. In the latter option you are at least rich and free from the obligation of working. Love marriages are often some struggle love scenario where u are not valued and the man is always feeling insecure about his manliness cos he can't provide.
plus people sleep around too much these days. having sex with someone is not a part of 'getting to know' them. sex has high value. women need to realize this and use it as leverage in getting what they want in life.
21 and never dated
@ somebody has some depression issues
Gena Holden why are you so triggered
And I'm 27!
I'm miserable on that side of my life!
I'm not even lacking on looks, "member", education, social skill, and whatever else.
I think these should just be called the European history of dating
Interesting
Exactly
Good videos but in most of the series, you really should add " in Europe" to the title, cos they look at the history and present in Europe alone 😅
Interesting look into dating but I don't see many people agreeing to that type of future dating since you might end up losing some individuality
Wow the future spin was unexpected! Great tho, and a scary proposed future that it seems we're heading too. Technology going from once being tools to constructs that will shape and dictate our lives...aahhh creepy but plausible 😮 great content as usual SOL the trip back in time was fascinating, surely marks how much we've progressed.
person in 2080:
oh, I wish I lived in 2018, dating sounds fun, although I know I would regret it, people got divorced back then.
Dating is the art of use and abuse of women and then let them go. And I like it
In 2075 I’ll be 85 years, I hope your prediction is right
The problem with that future is that some people will have more than 1 logical match
i think it might have been more relevant to not pick royalty or high class for all the examples though
Lotta love for a lotta these blessings 🍀
Can that machine come out sooner? I don't want to wait until i am in my 70s to have the option of that machine;lord knows i can't find them myself.
Doesn't, say, the existence of, say, _Romeo and Juliet_ (itself based on a much earlier story), undermine the veracity of this purported history?
WTF. How do you know it's gonna be in Singapore. May. 2075. I'm so impressed. Positively.
I am living in a real-life simulation based on the past isn't it?
I KNEW IT.
You skipped a little bit about the fact when the divorce became acceptable and having mistress became unacceptable..
Online dating and meeting lots of people really does ensure you will have weeded out the bad ones and ended up with someone who may meet our ultimate desires... not sure if AI will EVER be able to do that!
Moses Emmet it doesn't ensure, but it does help. There are too many factors at play for online dating to be foolproof, however I always say it's a little better than trying to connect with a stranger simply because you like his or her face. Then again, there could be qualities that we pick up on in person, subconsciously...I don't know, mating is a conundrum. I'm gonna go now lol...
If at some point they learn to translate our brains, it would be ez as fuck. But the thing is that al will have the information of every human being in the world, and whoever has that al has that information, and that's fucking scary.
The illusion of choice.
On the other hand of blind dating/arranged marriage, is a plethora of choice on your screen in front of you. You are, consciously or subconsciously, in order to get to your goal, begin to categorize, compare, and segregate all your potential matches by superficial and otherwise TRIVIAL little elements that you wouldn't have done so in the real world.
In the end, you sacrifice genuine human connection for an "easy means to an end", which paradoxically, can be even LESS fulfilling.
love your Italian pronunciation
Really interesting as usual! Thank you. BTW, the chess board is wrongly set!
Funny, in the past our parents shaped our lives and decisions. We went in going against our parents/guardians to manage our lives until now we use technology to look for our other halves..
I think it’s about time we started being more open to polyamory.