When Should I Tell Them? - Dating With a Chronic Illness

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  • Опубликовано: 31 янв 2025

Комментарии • 36

  • @BrittanyJheanelle
    @BrittanyJheanelle 4 года назад +31

    The gasp I let out when I saw the title 😭 I don't know why but I thought I was the only person concerned about this kinda thing 🥴

    • @YouLookOkayToMe
      @YouLookOkayToMe  4 года назад +2

      I'm glad you liked it! I'm glad we're starting to talk about this kind of stuff! The other parts of our life are just as important as managing the illness itself!

    • @jacobstanton8241
      @jacobstanton8241 3 года назад +1

      I feel it..

  • @olliviermae
    @olliviermae 4 года назад +16

    Earlier rather than later is ideal. If you found someone you want something serious with, I believe it’s important to be upfront and honest otherwise I feel as if you’re being deceitful. You have to ‘hide’ what you’re going through. Depending on how they respond, is what step to take next. If they choose not to stay, then despite the heartache you know early on that they’re not right for you. I have chronic illness and cancer, and so far I haven’t found anyone to volunteer to stick around, however I am not hopeless nor am I fearful of telling anyone. He’s out there. He just hasn’t shown-up yet. 😎🤓

  • @catsareawesome791
    @catsareawesome791 Год назад +7

    My first boyfriend complained about me not always being able to go out, or having to sit down during events (this was 4 years ago). An example is when we went to a day long plane show (not my thing rather his passion as he's an aircraft engineer), and I needed to sit on the grass after 1 hour of standing, to which he didn't even take notice of, and after a few hours I went into a catering room as it was 38 degrees celsius and I started feeling worse. I stayed there most of the day in pain and awful fatigue, while he watched the planes with his friend, and the next day complained about me 'ruining his day' and that I embarrased him in front of his friend 😔

    • @safaeali8510
      @safaeali8510 Год назад +3

      I'm sorry to hear that beautiful ❤ you deserve someone who loves you just the way you are.. with all of your health issues

    • @katec9893
      @katec9893 Год назад +5

      He sounds horribly inconsiderate and lacking in empathy. I hope he's an ex now so you can find someone much kinder and more supportive.

  • @jackiesicilian5720
    @jackiesicilian5720 3 года назад +11

    I've definitely held back consistently on dating sites because of my illness. Idk if it'll get better or worse, how can I explain? It's so hard to live my daily life I can't imagine dragging a partner down to my level, it's sad but I feel so alone too.
    God bless you 🙏

  • @mes0951
    @mes0951 3 года назад +14

    Wow I love this. It made me think about how avoidant I am when it comes to dating with a chronic illness. I’ve realized that I don’t get too close to ppl because of it. And for so many reasons. Thanks for this. This prompted me to create a video regarding this topic.

  • @luluthedoberman7490
    @luluthedoberman7490 Год назад +4

    I straight up tell them on dating apps, from the get go! I let the vulnerability out and sure there are assholes and people who think they know better than you and even feel the need to tell you - But the silver lining is: You will quickly weed out the ones not for you. They will step out sooner than later and that's actually a blessing because it saves you time and energy, effective because you cut to the chase quick. Sometimes radical self acceptance and vulnerability can feel scary but I think it's confidence and vulnerability that is attractive. Remember too, you are not your diagnosis.

  • @73starrdiva
    @73starrdiva 4 года назад +5

    Thank u...🥲newly single after over a decade...RA, chronic pain, ect plus I’m 48. Had just given up on dating and “burdening” someone with my issues...

  • @CRITITHINKS
    @CRITITHINKS 4 года назад +9

    Really enjoyed watching this.

  • @mandy81841
    @mandy81841 9 месяцев назад +2

    I met a guy online and didn't tell him about my chronic illness until the first time we met and he called me a liar and said I was hiding things from him and he could never trust me. He got very angrg with me.

  • @BrittanyJheanelle
    @BrittanyJheanelle 4 года назад +9

    Okay so this made me feel waaay less crazy and weird... can't wait for the next one bub 🥺♥️♥️♥️

  • @jismy012
    @jismy012 4 года назад +3

    My girlfriend has been really understanding about my multiple surgeries when I was younger and recently am going through some investigations and also got got diagnosed with CKD but just being honest about how you feel and when everything is too much to someone who will listen can really help.

  • @fedestanca6179
    @fedestanca6179 3 года назад +2

    Thank you for sharing this! At least I know I am not the only one dealing with this awful situation, in which you never really know when or how to bring it up. I am a disabled person and it s really hard for me to drag someone into my chornically ill world.

  • @VanessaBarg
    @VanessaBarg 3 года назад +2

    Thank you for this!!! Please, if you're serious about them, be honest about this part of yourself as you are about the others! Tell them early! Better for all parties!!!

  • @Emily26031
    @Emily26031 4 года назад +3

    such perfect timing for this series considering the article that came out recently

  • @eddddddddie
    @eddddddddie 4 года назад +3

    loving learning from each other, great idea!

  • @marielieful
    @marielieful 4 года назад +3

    Love it shared on my social media support groups

  • @enotj
    @enotj 4 года назад +2

    thank you for this. im so worried about dating when i get older (or at least when i move out of my small town lol)

  • @heatherhartman6474
    @heatherhartman6474 4 года назад +2

    Hello sweet lady! Thank you for your videos. Sending blessings and love to you! 🙏 🤗

  • @tahirihachiaa1626
    @tahirihachiaa1626 3 года назад +2

    such an awesome video ❤

  • @KweenPhotos
    @KweenPhotos 4 года назад +3

    it's so interesting how similar our answers are

  • @emilyexplosion9120
    @emilyexplosion9120 Год назад +2

    I struggle because I am terminal and approaching the point where my health is likely to diminish dramatically, and I'm not close to anyone. I will have a death doula, but I don't want to go to that appointment alone :(

    • @yvonnegrant1173
      @yvonnegrant1173 3 месяца назад

      So sorry for your situation.
      I wish I could help you.
      I have a chronic illness too, and I'm alone, and fear that I'll die alone too. I'm afraid to date. Don't want to be a burden. I'll say a prayer for you.
      Thanks for sharing ❤.

    • @yvonnegrant1173
      @yvonnegrant1173 3 месяца назад

      I'm in NYC. If you're in my area I could accompany you to your appointment Emily. My illness is not terminal.

  • @EdenDai96
    @EdenDai96 4 года назад +2

    Thanks for the video and doing cc ^.^

  • @LaurenJewel
    @LaurenJewel 2 года назад +1

    thank u soooo much for your video omg i needed this.

  • @iceyiana
    @iceyiana 3 года назад +2

    Thanks for this video. So helpful.

  • @MistahUnknown
    @MistahUnknown Год назад

    How do you go about bringing up that you have an illness?

  • @lyfesaquarium
    @lyfesaquarium 3 года назад +1

    This was cool just a background music was distracting

  • @MrDinodb
    @MrDinodb Год назад

    So... Don't hate me for this but I met a girl whom is truly sweet... But she has shared me details of her medical troubles regarding her hips and suffering of long covid... Which will probably affect her in the long term... Both have a wish to have children in the future but... with the risk of mortality involved I am so afraid to simply take the leap and be with her and well lose her or ... Watch her suffer in the future and its something I can do nothing about. I am conflicted in my choice here and am worried that I may look bad when I judge someone based on their medical deficiencies... Especially when it comes to children in the future.

    • @Ess_K_Games
      @Ess_K_Games Год назад +1

      I've got that same problem right now, so you're not alone there

    • @rahra2483
      @rahra2483 5 месяцев назад +1

      Be honest with yourself and then be honest with them. Nobody has time to waste.