Jessica's Female Friend Rules - Fresh Off The Boat
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- Опубликовано: 8 мар 2016
- Rules to hanging out with a female friend, as told by Jessica Huang. Watch a scene from Fresh Off The Boat - Season 2, Episode 15: "Keep Them Separated."
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Photos of your children must be present if they themselves can not be
Greedy D lmao gotta take those precautions
My rules
I am laughing too hard.
I love how she says the word “sun” to Louis. “Sun”, “ghost”, “red”, and “cat”. Except for ghost, the other three words wouldnt sound better in any other language.
I read this as soon as she said it.
Honestly if you are complaining about how crazy she is in this scene then you have not seen a single episode of Fresh Off The Boat... this is nothing.
Cindy Nguyen I remember when she yanked out her sons tooth and threatened to sue when she didnt want to pay extra fees at a hotel.
I just remember the Chinese Santa scene 😂
When the sun is up. My favorite line. So cute when she says the word “sun”.
Cindy Nguyen I agree
thats why i dont these are cringy as fuck throw the hoe away
She is an amazing actor.. lmao
I know, right? I never watched the show, but I just found out that she plays the wife and I went to school with her from like 1st through 10th grade. Crazy world.
Right!!!
Or she is really like this then she’s just bat shit crazy
I like her voice
Helo Well, I'd love to see you act. I mean, it can't be that hard right?
"or look like she weighs less than me" IM SO 😭😂😂😂
She's kind of as skinny as a person can be without being too skinny, so women who weigh less than her...generally shouldn't be thought of as a threat.
@@moonlily1 skinny shaming, are we today
@@imsungjaesmelody.thesnorte5623 what??
this is one of the reason why we need more female asian actors
Patient Zero YES PLEASE!!!
(Tho I'd like some Indian American female actors in that category too)
Arunima Tiwari lol an Indian actress IS an Asian actress
mandyhaswifi True. But it gets so confusing. Asian? Do you mean West Asian, South Asian, South East Asian, East Asian!? So I just wanted to clarify the sub-category.
*actress
@@esley02 actually, "actress" is a Hollywood term, invented with the popularity of film. Saying "female actor" is actually appropriate, and arguably more appropriate than saying "actress"
Also "female [Asian] actress" would be redundant.
The writing for this show is on point. I love this scene so much.
Clarisse Lee samee
Agree. Writing is super! Her acting lets it down
its ali wong she has a special called baby cobra and another one, when you see it you see this type of humor
The writing is great, but the delivery makes it.
i think she deserves an emmy for this show.
Migu and a golden globe
Migu I love the show . I don't know why I feel character is on point but her portrayal isn't.
If Louis from Malcolm in the middle didn't then she can't
clear soup or broth ONLY !
Dont get why tho
slaiyfershin : Because those food are bland.
More elegant and stylized dishes exude romance. Spaghetti can be eaten from both ends, milk shakes can be sipped together, and more
Lin Bin 😂😂😂 so clever
slaiyfershin that’s because clear soups and broths are considered ‘cooling’ to the body as opposed to ‘heaty’ foods (fried or roasted as opposed to steamed and boiled) which raise the body temperature and may incite the libido. Us Chinese have a similar view of food to the Tudors. :-P
I just liked your 999 comment and made it 1k 🔸🔹
going back lazy eye is out as it encourages eye contact. lol, really who's the writer?
Lei S
I love Ali Wong
Ali Wong is incredible
I don't get it... how does having a lazy eye encourage eye contact? I'm dumb lol
Yes so funny
The lazy eye and her facial expression made it a classic
My favourite caveat is "you must display your wedding ring close to your face" he's not going to look weird walking around with his left hand by his cheek. 😂😂😂
He can pretend that he has a toothache or maybe he could do the Thinker pose: hand on chin, ring on display and very visible.
Also, the children (or pictures of) must be present.
I think it's weird she expects him to obey her orders
@@someguy2744 or he could just use his wedding ring as a nose ring
I love how she loses the accent at the end "no Denzel movies" 😂
"clear soups and broths only" has me cackling. anyone who's won a partner via food knows the danger
1:00 As a dude, I find her gymnast rule to be....yeah that's fair.
I'm not touching this subject. I'm not. I want to but nah. Not bad not bad
I'm curious, what is the gymnast rule in ?
Could someone elaborate?
I'm assuming it's because gymnasts are typically in good shape and flexible
That Guy ruclips.net/video/hhak8bgbLtw/видео.html
I like how she doesn't do the stereotypical accent but her inflections signal that she's not speaking American English. Brilliant execution.
I don't know how she did this scene without laughing her ass out.
Too funny.
She was probably too focused on remembering this labyrinthine list of demands to have the spare mental energy to laugh at the sheer absurdity of it all.
@@selohcin 💯🤣
@@selohcin Or...she was speaking from the heart
How you know she didn't ng many times?
You've obviously never been in an abusive relationship with this type of women. This is triggering for me and is anything but funny.
Favorite scene. Best family show! Happy I found this clip!
Smokey eye makeup: Bad
Lazy eye: Good
No BAD; it encourages eye contact!
Constance Wu is just a gem. We aren't worthy of witnessing such talent.
louis: so i can never be around a woman outside of work?
jessica: that’s not what i’m saying. that would be crazy. all i am saying is if you’re going to hang out with a woman, it has to be when the sun is up. and she can’t be taller than me or younger than me or weigh less than me or look like she weighs less than me.
also, you can’t share food. okay, i guess if you’re stranded and you have to share food then clear soups and broths only! and you will display your wedding band close to your face at all times. photos of your children must be present if they themselves cannot be.
if she happens to touch you, even by accident, you will excuse yourself and call me immediately!
if she has smokey eye makeup, that is bad. if she has a lazy eye, that is good.
louis: jessica
jessica: you must always travel in separate vehicles. going back, lazy eye is out. it encourages eye contact. and she must never ever been or ever wanted to be a gymnast.
oh and this goes without saying but no denzel movies.
love her.
Edit: I wrote this for myself lol so I can’t recite it one day
bibbidibobbidiboo helpful
Thanks
Thanks I'm deaf
thanks a lot, my audio is off, lol
.
I firmly believe that Constance Wu is the reason for this shows success.
And now she's probably gonna be the reason of its demise
Ya think?
Randall Park was also really good!
Yes
"Oh and this goes without saying no denzel movies" she is so talented and amazing at wat she does
Vishnu Manimaran I can't wait for her movie that's coming out soon. She's the reason I watch the show.
Pulse22 same she is so funny and crazy rich asians the movie is coming soon i have been watching the trailer more than 5 times alrdy haha
lol, what a great show.
“That’s a good” just killed me. Her voice had me cracking up there.
Let's be honest, this all for love.
Love of control.
It’s all cause she’s insecure cause she thinks her husband doesn’t want her and will want someone more attractive than her, cause she’s insecure about herself not being attractive. But this is just a character in a tv show and it’s a joke.
@@michellepaul8514 here in North Carolina where we are reminded about this big-time actress Ava Gardner she had gotten married to this big-time actor I think his name is Mickey Rooney but this was the gist just of their relationship
Why is everyone laughing? I find this a perfectly reasonable list of demands
Lol yes😂
Me three
Most of it is. Sun up, separate cars, no touching, and the wedding band stays on. No Denzel movies also seems like a good idea. If you are attracted to her you can still be friends-but then you never get to meet alone.
If you want a toxic partnership this is definitly reasonable.
I'm assuming you're a troll and joking, so good job getting this comment out of me
I love this darn show and have a serious crush on Constance Wu. She’s absolutely gorgeous.
She has to win an Emmy at some point. This show will not work without Constance.
We need more Constance Wu!
I love this woman she is so beautiful
Now that she's the star of a blockbuster movie, she can finally be in consideration for Emmys. Constance is too underrated.
Jessica is the BEST character on the show.
A man and woman stranded in a dessert:
Her: I’m so hungry! Can you hand me the granola bars?
Him: Sorry, I’m afraid you can’t have these. *throws granola to the ground and stamps it into the sand*
Her: WHAT THE HELL?!
Him: “Clear soups or broths only!”
Now that is comedic talent! Awesome job Constance Wu 👍🏽👍🏽
This is me. I'm adding this to my favorites and sending it as an explanation on when they ask me what's an appropriate friend.
lol i just realized im like this with my boyfriend. It kind of puts it into perspective seeing someone else do it. Maybe I should tone down a bit? xD
That just shows you just think a man is an animal that you don't respect or trust. Anyway, yes tone it down because being treated like a baby or dog doesn't feel good. I'm surprised he even puts up with it!
It's stated as a fact majority of men cheat on their significant other, starting way back in ancient times as well. Men had more than one wife, and plenty of concubines. No wonder women are so skeptical of their boyfriends cheating or getting tempt into cheating :/
Where is this "fact"? Statistics say the numbers are roughly even with women actually a few percentages more likely. The men in history you refer to are less than 1% of the population, the richest and most powerful. Genetically we know as many as 40% of men never reproduced.
+julia So women don't cheat? Besides, if you don't trust your partner from the beginning simply because he's a man, you shouldn't be in a relationship to begin with. Stop only seeing gender and start taking his personality in consideration.
+Violet Haze Yes, definitely tone it down unless you're fine with him treating you this way too.
Tiger74147 where do you guys get your statistics? I’m not trying to argue with you, just interested. One I got from a book I recently read had 50% of men and 26% of women cheat
Love her, she is my favorite character :) she makes everything, so naturally, like she is not even acting haha
WHOS HERE FROM CRAZY RICH ASIANS TO SEE HER DIFF WORKS. SHES AMAZIN
yung basa : Puh-lease! I knew who Constance Wu was before that movie.
Me
Sounds a lot like my mom (Chinese as well). She is surprisingly the jealous type. Once I was at a wedding with my dad in China (she was in Germany at the time) she called me but heard a woman talking to my dad in the background and asked me who was trying to flirt with him. Well, nowadays Chinese men having mistresses is so common; so she is worried when he has to make business trips. I kinda understand her but then again, I think/ hope my dad is not the type of guy who would cheat on my mum 🤞🏻
He is. Hes just good at hiding it.
Valenchina Welp
Asian women are paranoid
@@ANKET47 Welp,that's not the majority. Chinese are known to have good family values. Honestly speaking,i have never been able to imagine more than one or two of my family members or my friends' family members cheat on their partners....
Yo are pretty
It's like she studied the rule book and memorized it.
I can’t watch too much of this😂Jessica, you are a genius
If my wife ain't this crazy, I dont want her
It's not that hard to find a jealous woman you will end up with one even if don't want to lol .
@@Marklee-lx7cd heh heh this guy knows
No. No No No. Never. Stick Your. Dick. In. Crazy. The sex is amazing, but in the long run, it is SO not worth it. And I say this as a female.
She is my spirit animal
If she's your spirit animal, seek counseling.
Omg this show is gold.
Omg.. I just started watching this shot..it's the best...she's amazing
Hell! Jessica nailed this part... 😅
Every dialogue and her expression upto the point.. 👍
I watch fresh of the boat only to see her craziness.. Big fan of hers...🤘
Slavic woman: Loads AK-47 and says "Don`t cheat"
Asian women: This is the regulation rulebook of the CCP. Slams 10 tons of paper on table.
Great show!!
I wish I didn't laugh at this scene, and it wasn't at the crazy rules. It was the look on his face. Priceless... And relatable for me!..
"It goes without saying. . . No Denzel movies" hahahaha love this woman and show
I like her direct and detailed approach, I appreciate that lol
Underrated show. I discovered this show only recently
this goes without saying, but no Denzel movies.
ahahahahahahaha
"If she happens to touch you, even if by accident, you will excuse yourself and call me immediately!"
PREACH! lol
I’ve watched the whole series and i enjoyed it a lot!
What a great actor she is... Damn, I adore her..
This scene was a walk in the park compared to that scene where she literally took away Eddie's bed
I'm thinking these are pretty well articulated rules
Everyone on this show is great but she's phenomenal.
*This actress is Amazing! Lol! Love her!* 👍
I'm so done.
+Tia Hunter with what?
hahahaha with women
She’s awesome 😂
She honestly makes the show
Love love love this show 😂
I LOVE THIS!!!!!! Trying to find the complete full episodes... where are they found?
Hulu!!!
Search watch episodes 1 and click the first link, and type fresh off the boat into the website's search bar
Michelle Lisa you can watch the recent episodes for free with the ABC app
She's beautiful and cute 👍
Love this show
How is she so PRETTY 😍😍
Ive heard of this show, but never watched it, this makes me want to watch it so bad. Asian people are awesome
Very reasonable agreement. I concur. 🤔😊🐆
Give her a hug she needs it
OMG! She needs to write a book..she got every rule
The way she changes her mind about the lazy eyes. lol
no eye contact
It's a shame that they got rid of this show with such a good show
I need more episodes/movies with her
Constance Wu was amazing in Crazy Rich Asians - I love her in Fresh Off the Boat - I want her in more films and shows 🥺👏✨❤️
She’s hilarious!!!
best scene ever... hahaha...
shes adorable
Can’t wait for her movie to come out!
CAN SOMEONE HELP ME PLEASE? I've been trying to find the who scene where they haggled the car dealership. From that kid that put a moustache later on all the way up to Shaq. I saw the whole thing on Tumblr and I want to show it to my mum now.
It's season 2 episode 3 or 4
Yay! That was an awesome scene...like many others
Ayla Williamson Wow you watch that on TUMBLR？ You beautiful soul~hahaha
I used to have an Asian girlfriend, she was just like this lol
The ending of this episode was the cherry on top
Love her
Those are very reasonable demands
LOWKEY...i ain't mad at these rules!
Toxic
She’s adorable
Love her !
I actually laughed at this because I am the same way 💖🤦🏽♀️👌👑😅
damn not giving him any options are ya? lol.
A book of wise relationship advice
I love Jessica so much
Lol, I think Mike Pence must have been taking notes from this!
Mike Pence would make an excellent Chinese husband.
Is it weird that I wish I had a girlfriend like her? I kind of like the idea of a partner who feels protective of me.
Funny as this is to watch on a TV show, you should never confuse this toxic behavior with actual love and care. Someone can feel protective of you without setting unrealistic boundaries that can and will be broken through day to day activities, which can lead to arguments, fights, and broken hearts. It only seems like fun from outside.
Remember kids, never stick your dick in crazy
Maybe You weren't loved enough as a child. Jesus is our only saviour. His love is unconditional
"Oh ! this goes without saying but... no denzel movies !!" killed me with this one 😂 😂
I just keep watching it
I see people say crazy girl.
Crazy girl?!
Please this is ASIAN standard practice.
This is me being not jealous.
Good guidelines 💎
This is how I first saw Constance Wu and Randall Park: Jessica and Louis Huang
Now: Rachel Chu and Agent Jimmy Woo
she absolutely 10 commandments her husband. :D