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Toxic Overthinking
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- Опубликовано: 25 июл 2024
- #arttalk #artvlog2022 #artcareer #artstyle #canadianartist #toxichabits
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Adam, I've been listening to your art talks for awhile now. Almost every single one of them hits hard. I cried while listening to the second half of this. I've lived for a long time in toxic family environments. I've removed myself from that entirely, but it still hurts to this day. I also realised I am still being toxic to myself, and hearing you talk, I understand where it was originating from. I've to make peace with myself that this happened and I have a choice to live well in the present and future, not to let the bad things happened define me. I love hearing you talk about these topics. It helped me a lot. Thank you so much!
While Adam isn't a mental health professional, I can recommend two channels to help with unlearning trauma mentality from toxic family systems: 'Therapy in a Nutshell' & 'Patrick Teahan LICSW'. It's not a complete replacement for actual therapy (and they do often have sponsorships with 'Better Help'), but these channels are super-informative to dealing with complex trauma based believes.
I can relate to having a toxic family situation. I had recently finally quit my job with the family that I've been in for almost 8 years then jumped into another fire with the next employer's wife being literally crazy (snapping at nothing to us all). Getting out of all this I realize that now that I've been hired with a company that treats their employees well that I have such deep traumas. Not only have I realized that, I also wasted so much of my life to get my career going. I learned social skills, sure, but my new job required me to start from the bottom again and make my way into marketing from retail sales. Being 30, I feel like so much time was wasted at the end of the day. So, yes, despite Adam lacking a degree in psych, he does lighten the load to hear what he says. Love yourself. We are awesome and don't let toxic people make us believe otherwise (I'm still telling myself this today). Good luck!
same
I struggle with the whole topic of perfectionism, comparing myself to others and negative thoughts too. I tought about this for a while now and think that the ego plays a big role.
I recently rewatched the classic Naruto series and in my opinion the conflict between Sasuke and Naruto and their development from the start of the show is a good picture for 2 different ways to approach growth in art. Its about being arrogant and proud vs humble.
At the beginning Sasukes mindset is like „I am an Uchiha! I am so talented! I am better than others.“ and he looks down on Naruto for being such an unskilled looser. Sasuke pulls all his selfworth from his achievments and with a father (like he had in the show too) who was emotionally unavailable and didn't see me when I was young I can relate to this alot! I also formed this picture of me in my head of being so talented and gifted as an artist because I was comparing myself to my family and surroundings who couldn't draw well.
All of this worked until i grew older and I encountered more people that were better than me or became better than me. Suddenly this perfect picture of myself got challenged and because I attached all my selfworth to it, it didn't just feel unpleasent to see others succeed no it felt threatening. That's what happens in the show too when Naruto starts to become better and better, Sauske just can't take it anymore.
He becomes bitter and dwells in this negative thoughts of „I am not good enough! I am too weak! How can this looser be better than me!?“. He starts his first fight at the hospital against Naruto because of that but gets humbled and his ego destroyed as he realizes that Naruto surpassed him (Chidori vs Rasengan). This fight happens for me and maybe other artist too when I see those artists on deviantart or artstation that are way better than me. It triggers the whole „I am not good enough, I will never make it“-mentality and just leads to frustration an the feeling of wanting to give up.
Naruto on the other hand has a different approach to it. He starts with no skill and compares himself to others too and looks up to Sasuke who was better than him at the start but! (and here comes the key difference) Naruto is humble. He knows that other people are better and accepts this fact but he doesen't stop there. He takes this as a motivation and just keeps going and trys to improve every day. He doesen't look down on others and is proud and brags because of his „talent“, he just physically practises again and again and gets better as a result. We have to get to this point where we can simply appreciate better artists and their work as Adam mentioned in his video.
To everyone who made it through this wall of text. Congrats :)!
I hope there is another anime loving artist that can relate and maybe got something helpful out of this comment ^^'.
Take care.
Very nice connection. Thank you 😊
im actually rewatching it now, a Naruto always has great life lessons, this one inspires me ALOT ruclips.net/video/cCmYyy1kktM/видео.html
also the fight between naruto and Neji is another great example of what you explained
I'm rewatching Shippuden, so this makes a ton of sense to me. Thank you for sharing it, and best of luck on your journey 👊
I relate to this on a personal level, and I also struggle with perfectionism ( you compared it to Sasuke, and I couldn't relate more tbh )
When I start over-thinking and self-doubting, I watch a Guillermo del Toro interview and he reminds me of the excitement of creation and bringing the things in our minds into reality, instead of the toxic things that plague me. Thank you for yet another thoughtful and inspiring video, Adam.
where is this interview? can you remember what it is called so I can look it up? Thank you in advance :)
@@nikkimclay7139 Hi Nikki! Honestly, pretty much any Guillermo interview will do it :) His character and passion shines in all of them I've seen so far.
"Action of any kind creates a momentum."
This spoke to me very deeply. Thank you for this beautiful reminder, Adam. 💙
Being a professional overthinker is sometimes a bless other times it's the worst curse.
I think one of the best things I accidentally learned through social media was the value of engaging with other artists. I have had my fair share of struggles, and though I have a general confidence in myself as an artist I have had many depressive periods where I would begin to wonder if my confidence was some form of delusion. Thankfully, though I have a small account in terms of followers, I have been able to find a wonderful little community of artists from all walks of life, and it’s always shocking to hear about their struggles and their doubts, and even more shocking is that sometimes an artist I look up to and consider ‘superior’ will tell me they wished they could draw like me!
My point isn’t to bolster my ego, but that I think all artists who strive to be authentic are susceptible to feelings of inadequacy-in a way, one of the first things many artists realize is that we can’t fully trust our eyes as our brain is conditioned to break what we see down into icons or symbols, and that often we have to try and look at subjects in a more abstract manner in order to get closer to the ‘truth’. It’s super important to find a healthy (important) community or group of people who can give you constructive feedback and challenge your perspective. I used to worry that I might be burdening someone else if I reached out for advice, but I’ve come to realize that it’s rarely a one way street-after all, whenever an artist asks for my advice (which is an amazing honor in itself) I find that in trying to help or explain a concept, that I improve as well.
I will note that I also had to learn to not dump everything on one person, and I have been lucky that I found people who would put up with me until I chilled out a bit.
Striving for authenticity and being an artist are both incredibly difficult things, and we’re going to slip and fall, have our moments of doubt as well as moments of victory. I’ve only recently started to adopt a more sympathetic attitude towards myself (therapy helps), but I think it’s important that we try to give ourselves the same compassion that we would to another. I used to believe that my highly abusive inner critic was what allowed me to improve, and maybe for a time there was some truth to that, but it no longer serves any purpose but to bring me down.
Great video as always, love the way these talks make me reflect upon my own experiences.
Thank you for sharing, I can relate, as many others do too I’m sure. How did you find your community of artists?
Social media has ruined the world. This is NOT real human interaction. This is lonely, everyone separated by digital barriers, in a universe of text and avatars. this is a lonely hell, this is why the world sucks.
Adam is like a dad to Me, Giving me some of the best Advices on some physical stuff and that.
I needed this today. I suffer from a panic disorder and uni is causing me tons of stress, making me overthink everything and have more panic attacks. I'm 22, studying communication design and just two days ago my professor 'criticised' me in front of everyone during a presentation in an insanely hurtful way, cut me off, didn't let me talk or finish. It brought me down, demotivated me and I'm trying to pull myself up and not let it get to me, but I can't stop thinking about it.
Thank you, you talking about your own experiences calmed me down a little. I'm off to make a plan and work on another project I still have to finish :)
That professor either doesn't know better or seriously got off humiliating someone in a vulnerable state.
Been there. Not with panic disorder, but similar stuff.
I'm truly sorry that happened to you. That's not what a responsible teacher is supposed to do.
But you will nail that project. You can turn that hurt into pity for the one downing you, and be free to continue your way.
That perspective worked for me, and I hope it could work for you. ^^
If you ever need someone to listen I’m more than willing to be an ear. I suffer from an anxiety disorder so I understand overthinking all too well.
I had the same thing happen to me exactly two days ago, I hope you know people like this do not dictate our lives and worth. All the best on your new project! :)
Thanks for doing what you do, Adam. I haven't been able to create art in a while and the space I'm in is terrible when it comes to creativity. It wasn't until last month or so where I went to an event to create art that I was able to be free from the space - akin to being able to breath.
Work has consumed my life because it's the only thing that can drag me out the rut, but reconnecting back to art and listening to your talk is reconnecting me with my desire to create art - in fact, starting to work again has cut me off from all the things I used to do when I had so much free time. Thank you for being supportive. It means a lot when it sometimes feels like I'm trapped and unable to pursue the very thing I'm passionate about.
I've been listening to your videos for over a year now. I love your art talks. Your voice is so soothing to listen to in the background while working. Many times im just so demotivated to work long hours. But your videos let me get through the times I'm just too tired to work.
Wow I'm early! I'm a big believer of that "action builds momentum" idea! A sure-fire way for me to get anything done is to write a to-do list and the next thing you know, I've ticked off most of the items on this list.
Omg….Adam Duff - I just came across you for the first time. You just spelled out my life. You just said out loud what I already know about myself. All of it. Have you been watching through my window? Thank you for saying it all out loud. Even regarding momentum. I woke up today with one thought: Nothing is going to change for my good unless I stop doubting myself and DO something. Then I sat down and stumbled upon your video. Marry me? LOL. And - I absolutely LOVE your painting style!
I'll keep getting amazed of how relatable ALL your videos are ... It's really comforting . Thank you , Adam :)
this is just the right thing for my morning after a very socially stressful party
Dear Mr. Duff, I just heard your thoughtful message on the whole Heard/ Depp recap. I want to thank you for your beautiful message. As im listening to you I found myself rethinking my painful life. I can say so much of it but l have to protect myself. I will keep looking for your wise messages. God bless you always! Thank you from the bottom of my heart !
O my, what a savage polish Grandma 😂 I can confirm it's classic for many eastern european families to constantly bring the kids down. I'm glad you found your supportive people and was able to pursue what you love!
Thank you Adam! When i was in my teens and early twenties (im 31 now) i used to compare myself so much to other artist that i gave up drawing. Only when i went back to college in Dawson in Montreal for night classes that I slowly regained my love for drawing and now i work as a graphic designer for a website company (making logos and illustrations) and i am super happy. I also started writing and illustrating my own comics and hopefully publish a illustrated children’s book and become an author/illustrator.
All this to say, and im quoting one of my favorite movies “Why do we fall? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.”
As long as i live and breathe, i will pursue my art career and keep moving forward.
Ps. Is Alain the one that stole your artwork too? If he is Eff that guy big time!
Much love, Reggie
I’m from Dorval btw :)
This felt liberating, thank you.
with regards to what your grand mother said. hurt people, say hurtful things, you are amazing Adam, such an inspiration!
Most people probably get in their own head from comparing their work to others. But, I'm one of those who gets down from comparing myself to myself. It really sucks seeing very little or no progress (or even going backwards). Plus, also being incredibly lost trying to study/learn art and not being the "artist" Adam and others seem to talk to. Guess it's just things like that which lead me to wanting to give up. I'm sure there will be an art talk that will hit home one day. But, I'm happy to know that Adam is helping so many people who will create (or continue creating) great art.
hey caleb! there's no such thing as "the artist". There's you, art and what you want to say with it! Art can take a lot of time, and gets frustrating sometimes with how slow progress can be. But everything takes time. Be patient, and try to leave your own self expectations away from your artwork. Be realistic in that regard too, like, if you can only invest a tiny amount of time in practising during a month it's natural for things to slow down in terms of progress! :)
Like Adam and others say: do it first for yourself and only then to others! Enjoy it, enjoy the process, the rest will come in time.
I don't know how you keep doing it Adam. I'll be listening to these while drawing then SOMETHING will hit me right in the bullseye and I'll be reduced to an emotional mess. Please, never ever stop what you're doing. Ever.
"how fast i grow/ how successful i am has never been a result of how much self-hate i have or how much i've compared myself to other people. My greatest self-growth has always comes from my most authentic self"
i needed to hear that for so long
I discivered your channel relaively recently and have listened to a lot of your art talks, theyve helped me a lot. i'm relatively young, had a not very great time growing up, but i've gotten out of that enviroment and since figured out a lot of things (on my own), a lot of the same things you talk about in your videos. Despite already "knowing" them, it means a lot to hear someone else with much more life experience having arrived at the same or very similar conclusions. thank you for sharing, i wish you all the best
Hey Adam. I can't calculate the odds of you reading this, but we are kindred spirits. Your videos always come at the right time and the right place and when they are most needed. I'd like to thank you for being one of the few people who had a fundemental influence on me in a very positive way as I grow and go through my journey.
Your words resonate in an unbelievable way.
Stay true.
this was a hard video to listen to and accept. I was gonna avoid it but everyday it kept showing up in the end it felt like a sign I should watch it and I'm glad I did thank you.
I struggle so much with comparing my work to others and feeling like there is no way I will be that good. It gets so bad that I actually walk away from doing projects because of it. This and all your videos have really helped me to fight through those thoughts and feelings. Thank you!
This was just the thing I needed to hear this weekend. Thanks for creating awesome paintings and sharing great insights.
Thank you so much for beeing the wonderful person you are and for your touching words ❤
Thank you! From the bottom of my heart.
I needed this.
I usually listen to your talks while I'm at work. And I gotta say, that is been really helping me deal with my issues in drawing and quelling the doubt for atleast a moment to get me motivated to try again.
Although I haven't listen to this one yet, I will soon when I have free time.
But I can share my experience with overthinking to the point where it's detrimental. When I want to communicate with a community, I over think it "They don't care, they don't even know who you are." Or drawing related ones "Why do you keep trying? You already know you'll be disappointed in the result."
To put it lightly it's been tough, but I am feeling better at the moment reaching out and drawing again.
I don't think you'll read this, but you know, I'll make an effort. Thank you. It really helps with the calming vibes and helped me think things through to get out of a bad head space.
You’re right, I’ll never read this…
Oops! ;)
@@AdamDuffArt
ah heck, no worries.
Hope you're having a wonderful Morning/ Afternoon/ Evening. Really enjoy your videos and talks.
pinterest ginger ale,adam duff or 'the scariest night of my life' or epic music world and I am gone! You are so right -its the best state
I really needed to hear some of these things today. Thank you, Adam. The bit about self-loathing not leading to growth was a really big kick in the pants.
Very rarely do I actually watch your art process, I just love to listen to your thoughts
No more words needed to be said than; Thank you Adam!
I needed to hear this. About halfway through i got out a piece i had put to the side and started doing the base painting, and then cleaned my watercolor palettes. I’ve needed to hear something like this for a long time. Thank you.
Coming across this video today is exactly what my soul needed right now. I’ve been feeling stuck for a while now, scared to take a leap of faith to a new career path into something I love, and generally doubting myself. So many words hit home, they brought up so many emotions to release, and I’ll be re-watching this video again and again when I need that gentle reminder. Thank you 💜
You know something, thank you for this, as an artist I can relate to everything you said. And it felt, like solidarity.
This was almost poetic and I listened to every second of your story. You’re and amazing storyteller. Thank you for sharing. Thank God I have never experienced anything like this; but it’s a reminder to all be kind to the people that surround you. A positive environment will help all to grow; a toxic one, kills any inspiration, creativity, and joy……
Thank you again for another amazing video 🥰
Aw, man. I just love your videos. Thank you so much, your work and your words definitely have a soft spot of a place in our artists' hearts. And I love your drawings as well 😄
This is so beautiful. Thanks for the words of wisdom once again. The part of being able to look at someone's incredible art work and not put yourself down and feel blissed that you can be inspired by such a incredible talent it's true freedom of mind. I can say that at 33 I can finally feel like that, feels like being able to breath after being underwater for a long time.
Always hits home. And always re-ignites something within whenever I listen to you. Thank you.
I always listen to your talks but this one really touched me and I actually started crying I think I just really needed to hear it, so thank you
You have no idea what your videos mean to me, I cried so much during this video please keep making this, you make a huge impact on people and you are needed, thank you for everything
Much love Adam, it was very vindicating hearing some of this after I have been changing my approach and outlook on all artistic pursuits this past year. I started going into a bubble and trying very hard to avoid any direct comparison when I'm working on anything and being able to disconnect that part of the mind from the creation process. Thus far its been much healthier feeling and frees me to only compare to myself and pursue getting better without the heavier demotivation. To hear you do similar things was kind of great, thanks
All i can say that since i lost the fear about being good enough or comparing me to others, i started to create my best and true work. When i took Control over my thinking and started to do what i wanted, everthing shifted to another level. I hope everybody can find the space where they can be totaly free with thier art. Love that you adam push erveryone that watches your videos to that goal. Always be that great inspiration in art and the mindset of being an artist. Love the Paperboi
i love you so much, Adam! you always hit the nail on the head with what i’m struggling at the moment… thank you for what you’re doing!!💜
Something I've noticed is your timing is always perfect,there are times you actually talk about the exact situation I'm going through.Thank you ! Love you man!
Bless you, you wonderful person, you. Thank you for being so open, so vulnerable, and for sharing such kind and motivating words. You are an inspiration.
Words can't explain how much I needed this. I really really needed this. Thank you.
Wow! What a rollercoaster of emotions. You earned yourself a heart touched sub.!
I have only yesterday been made aware of this channel when my 19 year old son shared a post, now I'm being listening as I landscape our creative garden.
So greatful for this thank you
Thank you so much for sharing your personal experiences! ❤
These art talks always feel like a true lesson of wisdom to me and I’m assuming also to just about everyone that watches them. It is truly one of the highest compliments I can give to say that every video you create never fails to teach me something life changing and has me gain new perspective, especially considering doing just that is also my own personal goal as an artist. I deeply admire you and the guidance you so beautifully give to many artists like me. You teach me to be not only a better artist, but a better person. Thank you so much for all you do. You never fail to inspire me.
This was one of the most calming and productive hours I've had for almost a week, there's just something about this talk that just made me so inspired. Thank you so much
I want to really thank you Adam.
I am in a rough patch of life in the moment and listening your take on creativity and I'd say life itself is one of the few things that can calm me.
Keep doing what you are doing.
You are helping a lot of people. Thank you for that.
Your talks always helps me, it just touches the deepest part of my soul.. the part that I need to take care of
Thank you from the bottom of my heart
You will always be great artist for us !!
Thank you for this video Adam 🙏
Thank you, I really needed this
Thank you for this, I really needed this, and it could have not come at a better time in my life
once again u have shown me the way, thanks!
You are such a pure human being - please please never change
I love your art talks, such great audios to put on the background when I want to feel relaxed yet focused on an art project. Thank you for your vulnerability and guidance for all of us newer creatives. The part about trauma resonated with me, how sometimes those scars don't go away as easily as we'd think. That gave me some reassurance that it's normal to still be ruminating on some things. Please keep this up Adam!
I love you adam thanks for always being there for me
Your videos is really encouraging,thank you for all your hard work
Dude, your existence on this dimension is such a blessing. I feel such respect and inspiration through your videos. I feel great. Thank you Adam !
Thank you, this comes exactly at the right time for me and it really, really helped to hear this - I wished my art profs ever had told me something similar.
17:19 wow that's all I needed to hear ❤
We live in a youth oriented society over looking the craftsmanship of years of producing over and over again. We should change this because artists with a lot of living life have so much more richer stories to tell.
oof this video hit hard and exactly when I needed it, thank you for all of your advice.
Hey Adam, I just wanted to thank you for sharing those art talks with us. Life put me currently in a spot where I can not attend art school, but thanks to you I don't think an art career is a lost cause. I understand that not everything always works out. Despite my current state I try to remain positive. I will get there one day. And for that I am grateful. You are a legend man
That hit me very deep, thank you ♥
Thank you Adam, I just signed up for a social drawing day at my local art space to get out of my house & out of my head.
I’m unemployed, pregnant and far from family. Things aren’t easy right now and I need to do something about it rather than dwell in self pity.
Another struggle is that I have used art as a coping mechanism for so long, that I fear I can’t create from a place of positivity. Maybe connection with other creatives can help me with this, I hope so. I want to create from a place of joy and my authentic self, and social situations are difficult for me so hopefully this class will be the challenge I need in one way or another.
Again, thank you. Your art talks have helped me a ton over many years ❤️
Your videos are like a hug over the internet. Thanks 🤗
Thanks Adam for everything you talked in videos you posted. I got a lot to say about my life as an artist. Pain hurt suffer. But just save those for now, I just want to say thank you. Your words are just exactly what I thought and talked to myself.
You shold know that you spread the big gigantic support for the artist in the world. Send huge appreciation from south east ansian country.
Thanks for this video Adam! Needed to hear this today❤️
I try to be myself as much as I can, life is too short to not be myself, in 'real' life or online and I try not to beat myself up about anything, hard tho due to past life experiences but ya just keep trying, thats all you can do
I'm very glad that I descoverd your channel. Very helpful advice you give that can cheer me up as an artist. Wish you all the best. Thank you
It all fits together because to be genuine you need to know yourself :)
It's my present fight. Sharing and participating is hard because to occupy space in other people's minds scare the shit out of me. At the same time if I don't do it I die. Every day. I am sure a lot of artists can relate! There's so much twisted conditioning once we start really digging it never ceases to surprise how knotted and out of shape our minds are. It's fuckin stupid sometimes the things that I believe, or that I think are important while completely missing the hidden pieces that just want to finally come out. They're kinda tied in those knots. So what I do is gently untie the knots. One by one. Start small. And grow. It hurts but it's worth it! Nothing is more than that.
You really are speaking to my soul. I always thought (or maybe I've been told) that my perfectionism, overthinking etc, were marely flaws of my character and I struggled with self-hate a lot. But it makes so much sense to look at it from the artist's perspective. The chances that you have someone in your life that will understand you from that very perspective, without any judgement, without opinion, is rare so this video feels like a completion to something I've always been missing. I feel like I have learned something new about myself with that I can take another step towards maybe feeling a little bit more proud of myself...
once again, this is really useful for me, i really needed this.. thanks man! from the bottom of soul! thanks for doing this
Thank you Adam, so insightful, I have learnt a lot from hearing talk and it will allow me to tell myself to keep working! Love your art too!
I don't know why I stoped a year ago, listening at your podcast. Maybe because I discovered your channel at a moment where I wasn't in my best me, and today I feel way better.
And on your side you are still good, so I do have months of videos to watch and listen!
Take care Adam!
Your words are like gold to me. Thanks for sharing these valuable thoughts and lessons
Wow. The timing on this one is fantastic. Really needed this.
I was waiting for this, thank you Adam
I have anxiety so I'm usually an expect on overthinking everything i do. This is the talk i needed and never knew where to look for. Scars from years and years of hurt are so easy to keep close to my chest and I've tried to minimize them to the point of thinking i was being too sensitive or petty. It came to where I only felt alive online because in real life pain was harder to deal.
For all of that, this talk felt like a warm hug. It felt like getting a gentle push into feeling more confident, in trusting myself an my art a bit more. Into not letting pain drag me down into thinking i have to be what others think of me and... Maybe i could have some kindness for myself too, and that I'm allowed to be my authentic self.
As always, thank you so much for your wise words Adam.
Thank you Adam!
I feel blessed to know you fren. You just made my day as allways 🙌🏻 ı appreciate you
This is really speaking to me atm, thanks Adam. Take care.
Sending that love back, Adam. We could not have asked for a better mentor. 💗
Thank you Adam, your words made me feel better and better..
Thanks for being genuine and honest. This talk was very poignant and surprisingly insightful.
Good Morning from the westcoast! tysm for always uploading amazing videos and beautiful talks!
Thanks Adam for this upload
Much thanks for your videos- Struggling to survive art for the diploma so I can do art as a hobby and not work, your videos is one of the only ones, but mostly the only one that calms me when I draw and be kinder to myself and my art. Thank you for your helpful and soothing videos :') Just moments ago It helped to pause my overthinking more than in the art aspect and calm myself down to let it pass.
The last part hits close to home. Still learning and adjusting to the fact that I can make mistakes and most of the times I will always have a chance to fix them, after years of not being given that chance to. It's still scary but I suppose I'll have to get use to a better situation.
Thanks again for your videos, they are always wonderful.
Brilliant, and so very encouraging. Thank you for proving a safe space to talk about how toxic over thinking is. 😢 this really validated a lot of things for me that I am trying to work on. Subbed
That- was lovely. Thank You.
Your last words are interesting, that art is a way to seperate your ego .... I've always been told the opposite, that what I'm doing is self-centered, unrealistic and that I have an ego. I don't know why art is interpretted that way by those that don't participate in art but in fact it's always been because I want to contribute more than just being another robot spinning their wheels for a company that would likely not treat me any better for it. So I thank you for that last little gem, truly.
I heard this at the right time. I just got an appt for mental health. Thank you.
Another really great listen! Thank you 🙏🏼