DATING and FLIRTING in GERMANY vs USA! (American learns how to date in Germany)
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- Опубликовано: 2 окт 2024
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I'm German but have lived in the US as well and I have to say the American way of flirting would be considered way to aggressive by many people here. People are just not used to this level of directness (only in flirting though, otherwise Germans are waaaayyy more direct than Americans).
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I found US men extremely agressive. And don't get me started on the sexual harassment. During on week in New York i was subjected to more sexual harassment than during one year in Germany. Especially street harassment. Seriously guys, that's not flirting or making compliments. Now wonder so many US women are scared and on constant alert.
Many German woman are also self confident and don`t go straight into sex with the men after a few meetings.
That's not "directness" it's plain rude.
I agree
I think the biggest difference is that in general, in Germany there is this expectation that you get to know each other and only spend time with people where you can actually imagine that you want to spend your life with...if you want something more casual, you are expected to make this clear from the get go. While in the US, it is usual to have a lot of casual relationships and then eventually decide to "go exclusive" with someone. That is just not the German way, either you are interested or you aren't, and if you are, it is just bad form to have "other options" on the side.
Agreed to the German side, couldn't say anything on the US side.
oh, now I understand all the 'I said ily to early/fast' tropes from the movies/shows lol
@@iramage2235 Yeah, I was completely confused in the past regarding the "going steady with someone" thing in American shows, because in my mind, if I am dating something, the long haul is at least an option and there is not need to officially "go steady", it is steady if you don't break up. That is until someone explained the concept of dating in the US to me. I naturally can't confirm how true it is, but based on what is presented in the US-Media, it is apparently really something which needs to be confirmed at some point.
I once read an American dude's blog - he has moved to Germany permanently and is married there too I think - where he described the German guys' flirting style as 'watching a clumsy giant Panda' and went on to describe that Americans had easy game with their openly aggressive style, as there was virtually no competition.
Well... yes and no.
It is true, Americans with their flirting style may have a bit of an easier time as for some women it's just a breath of fresh air if someone clearly comes out with their intentions right off the bat... but I do think that this may just hold true initially and that many times such approaches will end up being perceived as too pushy and superficial - I mean, you just know at some point when someone is just throwing lines at you that he throws at every other woman too.
German guys flirt comparably little and yes, it is often a bit clumsy, but it also depends a lot on the situation. If it's a guy you meet naturally via work/school/uni/in your neighborhood usually they'll just try to slowly build up a good rapport with you via a smile here and there and small talk and eventually ask if you'd like to go for a cup of coffee together. It's a slow build-up that gives both the chance to get to know each other quite well before you let it become anything more intimate and/or committed, and I think it leads to longer and healthier relationships.
Then you got certain situations in which flirting does happen faster and more aggressively, say in a club or at a Volksfest like Oktoberfest - so usually where there is alcohol involved. Obviously flirting has to happen fast here as you can't be sure if you'll ever run into that person again, so usually you'll give each other the eye in hopes to incourage them, maybe you dance and clink glasses a few times together, eventually they'll try to stand/sit near you and stuff can very rapidly develop from there... or not :p Btw. even if such meeting ended in a heavy makeout session or even more, often if the two really are interested and feel like getting to know each other more, they will actually start going on coffee or activity dates to get to know each other better even though technically they already were on a different base together.
It's generally just important for Germans, I feel, to slowly build up a good idea about the other person before rushing into any commitment.
For me the French men are top priority when it comes to aggressive flirting and approaching women this story really happened to me my husband my children and I spent a weekend in Paris we were walking near the Eifel tower and there was a man who sold paintings he had painted himself very nice i ran a little ahead and the family was behind me he probably thought i would be alone he ask me where i come from and i am from Germany and he replies oh he loves German women and if we don`t could meet sometime i answer no I`m married to which he answers that doesn`t bother me my husband comes and says to him leave my wife alone find another women later we all had to laugh so much i had never had such an experience with German men. Je taime !🤣😂😅❣
@Arno D. Das ist kein Witz in jeder Beziehung gibt es mal Streit das ist ganz normal aber ich kenne viele Paare die glücklich verheiratet sind .Für mich persönlich war der vierte Mann der richtige deshalb sind wir auch schon 32 Jahre zusammen.
@Arno D. Dankeschön! Das ist schon traurig das die Scheidungsrate in Deutschland so hoch ist, aber vielleicht hängt es auch damit zusammen das viele Paare wenn es etwas Probleme in der Beziehung gibt sofort auseinander gehen.
@Arno D. Was ja auch sinnvoll ist das man nur wegen Kleinigkeiten auseinander geht .Aber wiederum wenn man mit einem Partner 1Jahr zusammen leben muss mit dem man sich nicht mehr versteht das ist ziemlich schwer. Dann ist es wirklich besser das man dann für das Eine Jahr getrennt lebt.
Das tut mir leid das du dich alleine fühlst hier kannst du dich ja auch mit vielen anderen Leuten austauschen sonst wenn du andere Gesellschaft brauchts gibt es ja auch verschiedene Vereine und Gesprächs gruppen.☺@@tomalrongkheng9080
for me (a german woman), a date is just a meeting where u get to know each other. i will always make sure the person knows beforehand that it should be casual, i would never kiss on a first date because then i would be overwhelmed since i dont know if im gonna like the guy. meeting up just casually is the best thing
@Arno D. ehrloser, du bist ein sexist
Things German ladies might like in men: Having a profound sense of humour, being able to cook (from scratch would be fantastic) and being able to have conversations about every imaginable topic on a not too shallow level. Also, German ladies do not expect the man they date or go out with to pay all the time for them. Most of the time the bill will be split, or one day he pays, the next time she pays, in particular when both have a solid income of their own.
And in online dating apps: The first message can be generic imo since I know men have to write lots of women to get replies but if I do reply to you, maybe read through my profile again and find something that interests you and mention that.
i mean im 22. i do live in germany. i grew up and was born here.
i never ever have found a girl not wanting me to pay at the first date, nor did they care that i am able to cook from scratch nor did they value my sense of humor. - and thats something i really have, since i was able make everyone laugh so far.
most of the time they dont even understand my humor.
i dont want to spread hatred but often it seems that woman ( in my area ) search for the top notch man even tho they themselves do not even get close to this level. and thats why i personally gave up on this. i have a lot of skills ( from cooking to craftsmanship and beyond, i learned everything by my self from early on ) but yet not a single soul has been found to value this.
the modern german lady somehow seems to search something else.
@@deformiertergolfball4847 i assume op didn’t mention normal conversational skills, a positive outlook on life, and respect for people, bc those things are basic. Maybe they didn’t mind you paying bc they wanted to be compensated for the time they had lost.
@@Peacefrogg visce verca my friend :D i could say the same to the ladys which i mentioned with this comment. actually a few days ago i randomly ( and idk how this happened for real ) found a woman which invited me to a drink for the first time in my life. it made me pretty proud and happy since it was completley randomly. i had a nice talk with her, we drank, changed numbers and socials but yet nothing happened further even tho im looking forwoard to it.
i just told my experiance to this point of my life. i said i dont want to spread hatred and i know for sure (!) that there are more just like the certain girl i just talked about. but for me they just seem very rare. and thats why i just gave up on it. i cant be asked to try, make a step and encourage everything just by my self. if you dont want to go on a date with me, fine. if you consider me boring or a time waste - fine :D but tell me in first place that there is no interest.
@@deformiertergolfball4847 Maybe it's the way you behave or talk that makes them expect that you pay. I always ask in the end how we should pay and make casually clear that I don't expect my part to be paid, but most guys still insist on paying. If it was a good date and we'll meet again, I'll take care of the next bill. And I'd love me a man who can cook and teaches me because I suck at it. :D
I met my long-term girlfriend when she ran into me. We both were in a hurry, but in opposite directions, and we physically met at the street corner. And all of a sudden, we both felt that work can wait. I mean, I have brown eyes, she had brown eyes, and it was the time when the song "She's got the look" by Swedish pop band Roxette was played up and down on the radio. I wouldn't have let her go, no way.
Straight outta a romcom haha adorable :D
u should write a novel out of that LOL
So, you had a meat meet. 👍🙂
@@akernbach9488 what does that even mean?
Bars over here mostly aren't the same as in the US. It is often more a mixture of a bar and a cafe. When it comes to dating it's more like the two daters sit on their own table and have a cocktail or wine while talking to each other and focussing on each other
Yeah bars here are more like nighttime cafes in a way and not sleazy/cheap. I'd use "Kneipe" if I meant to say cheap bar-like establishment.
@@strange144 For me, a bar and Kneipe is the same thing, I use them synonymously 😊
Meeting for the first time at a bar is not the best experience because most of them are loud. Even though there's no loud music, some bars are so crowded that you actually have to shout like in a disco club in order to hear each other. Not the best ambiente for a first date.
I think it feels more honest if a guy is shy or a bit clumsy when he's trying to flirt. Aggressive flirting raises the red flags of dealing with a player.
11:37 that's a tram. You can see the rails on the street and the wires above.
That’s not a tram, it’s BATMAN
I think the biggest difference is that dating in general is very different in Germany. You don't date people you just met in Germany. Dating apps are trying to change this but they're mostly used to meet new people, not necessarily to date them.
Dating takes place almost exclusively among people who you're already friends with. At the very least you've known them and talked to them for a few months.
In germany aggresive flirting only "works" in clubs and datingapps by the strategy of "one of 100 will respond to it". Datingapps are common but still frowned upon. More of hookup stuff. Aggressive flirting is a telltale sign of a troublesome person, someone with serious social issues.
In germany it seems to be common to get to know someone over friends, hobbies and not instantly start dating.
Bars unlike clubs are a more of a cassual chill zone, quiet enough to talk, commonly talking with strangers cassually with lesser pressure about dating.
The "being open"-part is about being honest, but not puring out your trauma to that random bystander.
First dates are usually cassual get to know talks. Sharing interests and just who you actuallly are.
Yes, first dates have to be in public! Don't let a stranger know where you live of the bat. Don't be alone with a stranger.
What was the statistic? 20% of women experience sexual abuse? The better you look, the worse your odds are.
Also if it comes to cinema, dinner, activities that cost money, germans are on average pretty keen on splitting bills to avoid owning something to the stranger. There are creepy ppl and those creepy ppl think they own you if they pay for anything.
Flirting as woman: If all it takes is a smile, it is the wrong guy. The other person needs to have more criteria then "is female, alive and interested". If those are the only criteria, the guy is trouble. So you gotta flirt, get to know eachother, show interest, same work as a dude.
Only cheep hookups with the desperate folks are easy.
I was completely flabbergasted when a US woman once told me that men in the US expect sex after the third date. Because they are paying for everything so third date means putting out. WTF? Aside from the whole: he pays for everything. Just no. Nope.
I mean I know people who just encountered each other in a disco and then agreed to meet again and eventually married, but those are more the exception than the rule. Those moments of instand mutual attraction is rare, and even in those cases there was first a long talk before agreeing to move forward.
@@shadowfox009x That's why women tell each other to split the bill 50/50 so they don't feel like they owe the man sex (and possibly more importantly, he doesn't feel entitled to it either).
@@shadowfox009x ROFL. EXPECTS to have sex? Ok, I shouldn't have laughed, that is terrible! I guess 20 years of teenage magazines (bravo and the like) unanimously agreeing nobody should be pressured into sex went for something.
@@strange144 Naaaa. Never had sex in mind with the splitting. My idea is that the guy shouldn't get the feeling that I am using him.
Thanks to your flirting advice for girls now I know why so many men think a women is flirting with them but they just don't consider maybe she's just being polite 😉
One thing I once heard about a first date and found helpful is to remind yourself the only purpose of a first date is to find out if you want a second date
Huh? I thought the first date was to find out whether she's into anal?!?
Guess men and women date differently...
Hi, that was an interesting video! In my (South-West) german experience, flirting starts with eye contact and a little smile. We Germans rarely flirt aggressively. If the first thing was a big compliment, it would be considered over the top. If a guy just piles up the compliments, it might feel like being pervy or trying to hard. The talk should start with an introduction and then talking about various topics in a witty way, making each other smile, and if you feel the other person opening up to you, you can mix in a nice compliment. Under no circumstances should you start with a big compliment and touching. It would feel not appropriate. Also, you don't want to be perceived as superficial. If a girl behaved as you recommended, she might give the impression that she is only after a fling - which of course is also legitimate, if that is your intention.
Bars are (mostly) not seedy over here, but cool or cosy places to have a glass of wine or cocktail and maybe finger food in the evening. Dinner dates in Germany are a bigger commitment and may be awkward if the date does not go well because depending on the restaurant, dinner takes between 1 and 2 hours - if you have coffee and desert and enjoy the company, 3 hours are often the case. Your German accent is top notch!
Yes! As a German girl I can confirm
As an aroace women (= put off by both romance and sex): seriously SUPER helpful video and your comments are also super helpful. Men mistake my openness and generally chatty and happy personality for flirting all of the time. Then some start confessing to me or tell me they have a crush on me at some point (in their overly intellectual german way lol) and I'm like "where the hell does this come from??". It puts me off and risks the friendship I was trying to grow.
Anyways, you saying women just have to smile at you and "touch their arm" or something is both helpful and terrifying. Like... how else am I supposed to react when I talk to literally any person whose company I enjoy? Not sure if all women intend to flirt when they behave in that way, seriously haha
Don't get too touchy and too close physically. Also just maybe drop the fact that you are aroace early on. That way they should know that you only want to be friends
I had the same problem with a lot of guys, I generally an open person and I smile at everyone hat I like. Mostly men interpret that as me having romantic or sexual interest, when in reality I just think they are nice ppl. Strangely no women ever interpreted my smiles as flirting. This lead to a few horrible situations where the guy actually thought I was interested in him despite me being in a relationship and then he was so angry at me for rejecting him, that our friendship ended. Very sad and unfair I think.
I've had a few "a coffee and a walk" first dates here in Germany too, but I had no idea it was this common. Honestly it's just a great way to start getting to know someone.
In Austria we like friends of friends. "Show me your friends and I know who you are" is the motto and a kind of security, so that the relationship lasts longer, ideally forever.
Please don't forget, that easy German channel ist hosted in Berlin. Berlin has it's own rules.
to be honest, the most cases i experienced were friendgroups coming together, bring in new peeps and after some time it sparks xD if you find a theme or hobby to relate its easier to start and thats what makes it easier :D
ah yes, one of my oddest experiences was with man who straight up walked over and asked me for my number without any conversation starter, i think he was a refugee, he barely spoke english o.o
Yeah, this is too superficial.
And a tip I find helpful is not asking for the number, but offering your number. It's somehow nicer and the other person can decide later, has more time to decide.
About 5 years ago, a customer sent me a "flirt" email to my work email address. I found the text rather weird and uncomfortable and the whole situation strange. (I am and was an "old married hen" at the time, too.) I was very firm, but politely declined
And yes, the person was not from Gremany or grown up in Germany and was at least 10 years younger than me.
These two men (7:04) did it perfectly. I would like it, it's open, direct and sympathetic. The most important thing is to respect when a girl/ woman says "not interested". Nothing sucks more than pushy guys.
this once happened to me, too, but in a tramway fully packed with people and my mom (out of all people) being next to me😅😂 I think the guy had some special needs stuff going on because he spoke too loudly (more than the cultural norm would allow) and he was very thin and looked smart, like an IQ 180+. He asked me if he could invite me to a cup of icecream, and I kid you not, ALL the women in my tram section grinned and looked at me. I declined the offer politely but it was awkward af since the guy did that to me in a place where there was no way for us to part ways after declining the offer. So I was forced to stand there, look out the window, and the dude still looking and me, and my mom smiling, and all women smiling. And I was 16. The asking out was perfectly executed and the guy didn't say anything wrong, but the environment turned it into such an embarassing situation for me😂
You really think so? I think stopping someone when they're walking by is kinda odd. Not rude or anything but definitely out of the ordinary and I don't think it'd put me in the right mood to accept. Although I guess I don't know any other way since otherwise you might never see the person again.
hmmm - If I go and visit America I will go to the very first girl and say: I've seen that dude on RUclips, Ryan Wass, and he said if you speak english with a horrible accent it's almost a guaranteed success. That's me. Do you want to join me for a ice cone?
You should check out "Europa park" (amusement park) and "Rulantica" (water park)
every 11 minutes, a single falls in love over Parship...
I searched for this kind of comment, as soon as I heard parship😂
Awesome video! I really like your questions. It gives such a good insight in how you and maybe some US Americans think
i could watch 2 germany videos a day tbh. :D
Feli from Germany also did some videos about dating in Germany, and compared to the USA. You should react to them too 🙌
I guess online dating became huge during the pandemic. But it never worked out more than two months when I dated someone I connected with through an app. Real life works way better. Having the same hobby makes a great connection and it's more likely to meet similar minded people.
Like everywhere I guess it depends on the situation and the kind of people involved. If you are out at a club or something the flirting is very different than if you meet someone through friends, at Uni or at your place of work. I met my husband at Uni. He was sitting at a table in the cafeteria with some people I knew and we just got talking and then we exchanged ICQ-numbers (yes I'm that old) and chatted online for a week or so and then went out on a date. I think the main thing in Germany is that as a woman you kind of like a guy to be charming without putting on a show or being to obvious. It is more about discovering commonalities and getting to know each others interests and see if you are attracted to the other person. That is of course if you are looking for a serious relationship. If you are looking for a one-night-stand than things are obviously different but usually most women are even in those circumstances looking for men that are at least somewhat compatible in interests. Basically many German women are wooed with good conversation rather than a quick smooth line.
11:36 ... Oh look at that bus .... Uhm .... That's not a bus xD
Yeah also learned that a year ago and also saw it life in a bar. The younger generation realy exchanges Instagram profiles.
My brain is not made to process this level of social media relevance.
You said "Guten Tag" very very good :-)
In the channel "Dating beyond borders" there is a video called "you know you are dating a German woman, when" it is hilarious but also very accurate.
yes I love the video!!! He should react to that :D
I always just.. talk to the person I wanted to flirt with and take it from there, but I would never start talking to a person I didn't know at all, so maybe it's a different style of flirting they are talking about? I never had problems with it and thought being yourself and letting your personality do it's thing comes really natural if you're genuinely interested in the other person. I have no idea if this is considered good or bad flirting in other cultures lmao, but it just feels "right" to me - "just do it"
The ok Cupid vehile , wasn't a bus...its an city tram ...almost like a train
Btw how does it feel when you as an American guy hear that native German speakers use separate English words like "ready"? Lol
I'm German and I think that it would scare me a bit off if the man would be to aggressive with his flirting. I am more the introvert and shy kind of woman and I need always a bit of time to "warm up" with strangers which don't mean that I don't like the person. If I once know them I am ok with them being more "aggressive". Another thing is that Insta-thing. I am 25, I have Insta but I would more likely giving my phone number away than my Instaname.
Just as a reference: this is the song they keep mentioning: ruclips.net/video/_KOUCOYVAos/видео.html
Yes, I like "Wir sind Helden".
Guten Tag, Ryan! Love your videos!
homie called a tram a bus, all love from austria tho you make some entertaining ass videos
Flirting in public is basically nonexistent. Immigrants and foreigners will do it, I've gotten cat called by plenty of African Men (they've identified themselves as such, I'm African American, born in Germany, shoo) but it's definitely not the norm. Acts of service are much more common, from a woman's perspective. Offering you help in stores, buying drinks, even asking for something (usually directions), just anything to get talking and then hopefully go from there.
Aggressive flirting or catcalling someine in Germany is just generally frowned upon. Women will probably make it very obvious they don't want to continue to engage (short answers, looking away, straight up walking away if they don't outright reject the advances) but more often than not you just get a fake phone number of a throwaway Snapchat account
this is germany, the girl is not allowed to be late, the guy is not allowed to be late, the toddler is not allowed to be late and the dog is not allowed to be late :P....only the train is
Ryan, you really should make it into a date with your wife. At least you already know the company is great.
It's Heaven when:
The French are chefs
The British are police
The Germans are engineers
The Swiss are bankers
And the Italians are lovers
It's Hell when:
The English are chefs
The Germans are police
The French are engineers
The Swiss are lovers
And the Italians are bankers.
You know that banks and stuff originated in Italy?
@@aramisortsbottcher8201 That’s why the Mafia also originated in Italy.
But no one knows what was First 😜
In fact, I met my wife "via the computer" back in 1993, when the Internet wasn't even a big thing and long before there were dating sites and apps. She did additional training that also required computer skills and had difficulty with it. I've given courses and that's another way you can get to know each other. Good for me, I have a hard time flirting too.
Dir auch einen guten Tag. :D yeah was perfect :D
Just to comment your „you germans like fancy sunglasses“. Easy german always walks trough berlin. Berlin is different like the rest of germany. They try to be a fashion, art etc city/culture. Beiing fancy without money (they hate munic because it is a rich city)
I thought you take weekends off Ryan? See u Monday 😅
I like to watch your videos. You are funny and very personable 🙂👍
One of the things which makes dating easier for youth in Germany is the nightclub culture. My German friends often used to drop off their 15/16 yr old kids at a nightclub on a weekend evening, about 9.00 or 10.00 pm, and arrange to pick them up at 2.00 am. If the kids (at least those 16 or older) were a little drunk, there were no great reciminations. Kids 16 or over were given special bracelets on admission to show they were old enough to buy beer, wine, or coolers. Normally, these teen nights at clubs wouldn't allow anyone over 21 or sometimes 25 yrs old. Once 18, my friends' kids were trusted to get a taxi home, but were expected home before breakfast.
according to Jugendschutzgesetz, night clubs are illegal for < 18 - they would risk their license if any < 18 y/o would be found there.
And 16-18 y/o are only allowed to stay longer than 24:00 if accompanied by an adult.
< 16 y/o must be accompanied by an adult all the time.
(JuSchG § 4, it is displayed in every restaurant, cafè, bar or whatever)
So your German friends cannot have dropped their kids at a night club.
The only exception to this rule are events organized by registered youth organizations - so when the youth center of a city or YMCA or similar organization organized a youth disco, they could be dropped off and picked up at 02:00. But not at a night club.
There is a great danger for Americans: Surely it is flirting, but Germans are usually honest and serious, so don't be surprised, he/she might grab you and don't let you go easily.
Just toss all the plans overboard send the other one a smile and even say:”Hello!”. Let someone feel relaxed. The entire planning-stuff is not necessary. If she didn’t run away right after she needed to slap you it can’t have been that bad. (Laughing is no no go).
16:36 "This guy, I think he's a vampire" made me laugh out loud.
I'm a shy German woman that never dated much. Or I didn't realize, when a German flirted with me (I honestly don't know). Here are some of my experiences:
- When foreigners flirted with me and asked for my number, they often wouldn't accept a "no". Please don't do that. It is really uncomfortable and it ended in my ghosting them because I really had no interest.
- Many Germans find their partner through friends, hobbies or school/work. Either common friends have the feeling that two people should date or the two already know each other and flirt.
- In my experience, flirting is done by spending much time with the other person or texting a lot. This is of course not the best way to flirt, since it is entirely possible to spend time and just be friends. Therefore, this way of flirting is always connected to an insecurity whether the other person has feelings or not.
- If you're not lucky enough to find your soulmate at work or through friends, you can either go to a club or try dating apps. In a club, people are of course a lot more open (probably because of the alcohol). It is easier to find someone for the night, but it often doesn't result in a relationship.
- Dating apps can also be used for a bit of fun. But it can be helpful for shy people to get to know similar people. It is becoming a more common way of dating, since it allows an open conversation with a stranger. However, most dating apps are beneficial for women since men might have to pay for features that women get for free.
For some reason I feel very uncomfortable when people judge me by my outer appearance. If they say, I think you are pretty, I usually run. I would prefer them to say sth. about my character or abilities.
But on the FIRST date you don’t know the other person at all.. so how can the person make a compliment on your character or your abilities? Like how??
@@MissAngelaiz something like "You're a good listener", "You're funny", "I feel comfortable around you", or even if you just like how the person looks, you can say "you have a great style" or something, so it's about the choices they make instead of the body they were born with.
@@Roozyj aaaah okay, I always did it unconsciously 😅
Do you perfer:
A: Hey, i have just seen you from the other side of the bar and i really like how smart you are.
B: How do you know how smart i am?
A: I have been stalking you for the past 4 years.
Or are you more like a
A: Hey, i have seen you from the other side of the bar and i really like your sense of humor.
B: How do you know my sense of humor? We never talked to each other.
A: Thats right. I just really didnt want to talk about your looks, so i thought you might at least be funny.
type of person?
Talking about someones personality as the start of the conversation is quite hard because i am approching you to get to know you and your personallity.
@@Jaddas How about "Hey, I have seen you from the other side of the bar and I really like your style". That's still kind of an appearance thing, but it's also about someone's choices.
your _Guten Tag_ was pretty good! next time: my friends in german aswell: _meine Freunde_
how do you write in Italics?
@@NoctLightCloud use the underscore on both sides of the section like ,section, but , is replaced with _
you can also use the star: *to write like this*
*
@@goblinkoma the *star* I know, but I didn't know about the _underline_ , thanks buddy!
Funny, that guy at 4:52 is a former co-worker of mine. ^^
8:42 "Klassischerweise natürlich auf Tinder" is auch geil lol.
Warum nennt sie Tinder nicht gleich traditionell, oder gar altbackend 🤣
Töpfern? I guess he means any activity both enjoy, friends, Party. I never went on a Coffee or just by talking a Walk. Don't be drunk.
Cinema is great for dates if both are into the movie as you can talk for hours before and after the movie. Just cinema is a bad idea, but dinner, movie, drinks seems like a pretty good date. You get time to learn about each other, a good silent moment, well or three hours if both are into MCU Movies and afterwards even some topic to talk about or joke about if the movie was bad. ;-)
One of your best so far imo! You made a lot of good and funny comments 😁
Without sounding weird..after all I'm old enough to be your mother..lol...I should of thought that all you need to do is look at someone intently with those lovely blue eyes and you'd be sorted 😁 💗 🇬🇧
France (68million) is almost twice as big as germany (84million). But germany has has double the population density. German population density is also a bit higher than in italy.
From that perspective you could say flirting in germany is as german as it gets: laughably overcomplicated yet very effective.
that was fun^^ thank's ^^
You really think any accent would be helpful? I feel like having a French or maybe Spanish accent could sound nice and/or interesting for US/English speaking woman and I know many girls like when a guy speaks with a British accent (although I doubt they mean every British accent and just think of one specific way of speaking that is shown in movies, etc. The differences are similar to high German and all the dialects. Even native speakers from different regions barely understand each other). But a German accent? Somehow that doesn't scream flirty accent to me. 😄 But maybe we dislike it more than actual native English speakers do. I don't know, but most people I know (myself included) hate when they hear that our accent is noticeable and try to get rid of it.
Video suggestion: Why I will NEVER MOVE BACK TO THE USA after living in Germany | health care (Roe v Wade) & education - Catiana Izabelle
Good Job, Ryan!
I think many would develop something in the direction of hatred if you flirt too hardcore
I rly like your imitations of vampires, Germans, women …keep going! 👍🏻
If you are in germany and you see a man like this guy in minuet 11:28 you can tell that he only has to lock at a girl a litle flirtive to winn her over
Your videos are my coping to living in Germany
🤣🤣🤣 this is what your doing wrong Ryan
It's her job to suck at flirting 😉
Sorry miss Ryan if you had to read this 😂
Guten Tag was good :D
I think it is not about if somebody is from America, but how he is like. I would not be able to cope with a very LOUD person, and Americans have a tendency to be louder.
But there have to be Introverts in America too.
And about where to date: I think most people meet their partners at work or over friends. I think bars and nightclubs are only for extroverted folks and this way are incompatible with at least 30% of the population.
Pottery and things like that are great for a date. Walks in popular regions are great too, just not alone in the woods.
This Interview is in Berlin right???
It depends
Bremen is much more open!!
Its different
But it always starts with a Smile
and eye contact !!!
But most of the people unlearned real flirting because of Instagram and Parship etc.
Thats sad and awkward
So shocked when he said guten Tag hahah
ja guten tag was correct, but alot of germans also say guten tach . I for example say tach instead of tag when I leave out the guten.
I smile and laugh a lot and I also like to touch people I like but that is by no means flirting. No wonder so many men think we flirt with them when we are actually not.
The worst thing a man can say is "Oh, I find you beautiful and would like to invite on a date." Basically any "compliment" that has to do with the looks like you've got beautiful smile, beautiful eyes etc is a shitty way to approach a woman. That way we feel objectified and trust me you don't want to create this impression if you genuinely like someone...
I would say everyone should only speak for themselves here. No matter if we like it or not, when it's a stranger, the looks are gonna be first thing that interests us. Of course after getting to know each other the interest is either stronger or it dies down, because looks are not the main part, but it's the first step. And everyone has a type, it's a fact
@@foreveryoung3663 Exactly. If you don't come across fetishizing someone, telling random strangers that you think they're cute and would be happy to take them for a coffee sometime is not necessarily common, but perfectly acceptable.
Most women will even be flattered because for the compliment if you're not way older or unclean. It only gets annoying and weird when the woman says no or shifts around uncomfortably and the guy keeps pushing trying to guilt her into "giving him a chance". That makes even me as a bystander uncomfortable.
The swiss guy spoke really good standard german. They usually have a strong accent from their dialect.
I would recommend you to watch more videos from easygerman me as someone living and also grew up here I also watch their videos just to see how Germans think about certain subjects
Einen schönen guten Tag auch, funny story, with the flirting, in my area there is a thing where this is taken to the opposite as a game, so hunting for rejections as the target with the bill for the evening on the line... if a girl still bites, you loose, it's a bittersweet thing, you win the girl but you have to pay the entire bill, worst case was, when a friend actually lost asking a girl "wanna F***?" she looked at him and said yes. XD well fun aside, this game actually has helped a lot of guys to get over the fear of rejection, which is almost always the actual problem.
While learning to deal with the fear or rejection would be a great thing for me, i am not going to do it by being extremly creepy and weird.
There are better ways of learning that without making a bunch of women increadibly uncomfortable.
When you go into a conversation thinking "hopefully i make her super uncomfortable and get rejected as fast as possible." Please dont start the conversation.
@@Jaddas let me ask you one question, who do you fly with, a pilot with 200 hours on the simulator or a pilot with 10 hours in the cockpit... anyway, it's just a game, nothing is stopping you from apologizing, many girls are actually good sports and those who aren't, well, who wants a girl that can't take a joke anyway, right?
@@raistormrs Let me ask you a question. Since when is "talking to a women without purposly making her uncomfortable" not real experience in talking to women and only a simulation?
Also the second part of your comment is really showing what type of person you are. "A lot of women arent too mad about it and who cares about the ones that are (justifiably) upset."
The lack of empathy in your 2 comments is insane. You basically told me that you dont give the slightest sh*t about other peoples feelings as long as it makes for a "fun" game with friends, that doesnt actually teach you how to talk to women, because obviously if you are trying to be rejected you are not yourself.
Jesus christ please tell me you have never actually played this game or at the very least dont do it anymore.
@@Jaddas only played it once to help cheer up a friend i'm more of the spectator type, but wait a minute here, there are rules you know, you can't just go about insulting them or whatnot, it has to be a proper thought out line you are sure won't work on the one you decide on. there is nothing to get upset about.
I am surprised that no-one mentioned outdoor activities such as walking or biking. I meet and flirt a lot while out there.
As a desperately poor student, I once rode the subway in Munich without a cent in my pocket. At Goetheplatz, a beautiful girl got on. I couldn't help myself and asked if she'd like to have a coffee with me. Given my financial situation, I added, "But you'd have to pay because I don't have any money." She laughed and agreed. Sadly, nothing came of it. She was a doctoral student at LMU, and I was just a young freshman.
Heck what do i know, im with my GF for over 12+ years. But others told me, it is all about online dating nowdays. Even in Germany. Mostly Tinder, but how they told me, it's very difficult nowdays, because of that.
Key Characteristics of German Flirting:
Subtlety: Germans tend to flirt in a very subtle manner, avoiding overt or direct expressions of interest. This can be confusing for those used to more direct flirting styles.
Patience: The process of getting to know someone and developing a relationship takes time. Germans might spend a lot of time talking and getting to know each other before taking the first step.
Indirectness: Rather than making bold moves, Germans might show their interest through small, indirect actions and gestures.
Reserved Behavior: Public displays of affection or loud expressions of interest are less common. Instead, meaningful conversations and understated gestures are preferred.
Importance of Words: Words and what is said carry significant weight. Compliments and expressions of interest might be more meaningful and thoughtful rather than frequent and casual.
Oh my goodness... I am a German woman and I am shocked that no one seems to know how to flirt?... Flirting has a lot to do with teasing and provoking the guy you are interested in. Witty remarks, challenging the guy always made men be attracted to me.
I am just myself on a date. 🙂
It's more than just smiling at the guy. I consider myself as an active flirter. 😃
I find flirt lines extremely boring and guys, who try to impress me.... no one can raise my interest with this.
OK, it's the second Time i hear it and now i have to say it: In Germany, we have the phrase: "Dumm aber glücklich" It means: "Stupid but happy"- an like u said, if u'r not that...smart, u don't worry about much things :D
"He is a vampire" you got me there :D
ALl the time were like "damn, this dude looks hot and kinda mysterios, he could be a smart villain in a movie" :D
Germans are really bad at flirting (such as myself). But the best pick up line i actually got from an english science love song :D
"Take away gravity. I'd still fall for you". For me it doesn't get more romantic than this.
If an extremely good looking guy enters a space, he is used to women staring at him and going... "Oh my gosh, look at him"... then they try to be sexy and all to get his attention.
Best way to have that guy be interested in YOU is to not pay attention to him...ignore him, just be yourself, have fun. He will come up to the one, who is not trying hard to get his attention, because he is not used to it and it challenges him. Therefore he picks out the one who spreads out confidence, who enjoys herself, who is not impressed by his looks, who doesn't try to get his attention.
My friends always wondered why the best looking guys were interested in me. I guess that's why. 🙂
...A man needs to believe he picked you, but in real you picked him already, before he noticed you by not doing what the other girls do. - That's it! 😏😀
I heard for a moment that you said you didn't know if Germany used the internet
I was desperately rewinding like "say it ain't so. Not you ryan, not after all these compilations
Instagram is a fair enough thing to be surprised about
Did you know, at least in Belgium, most people also use Instagram, but almost no one uses twitter and almost everyone uses Facebook
That was already the case before twitter became 'x' and all that
I met many girls when in a sports club. Even some boys. My wife I met in a sports class. Then we arranged meeting up in a club then in a restaurant...
You saying that a smile and touching the arm of a person is seen as flirting from a guys perspective actually shocks me, but is also explains some uncomfortable situations I experienced in the past. For me it's just a nice and polite interaction with others, especially the smiling part. I can't imagine not smiling at people bc they could think that I'm flirting, it would be rude wouldn't it? It's really weird that some ppl are trying to imagine interest from another person when they just behave in a completely normal way.
the intelligence vs. no intelligence correlation with flirting skills is big bullshit. It is a skill you can learn, nothing else. Dumber people maybe learn this earlier, cause they don't learn much other stuff .D
Ryan, you are kinda quite German in attitude. Greetings from an Austrian
I find the best way to date for a man, anywhere, is just to accept there will be a lot of "no's". If you don't let any no's upset you, you will get a "yes" quicker!
Intelligence has nothing to do with you ability to flirt, i mean im not stupid and i can flirt as well if i like to. Maybe if your like Steven Hawking smart it might be different xDDDD
Hello Ryan, why dont you introduce yourself a littlbe bit more, and tell us about your interest in Germany?
A boisterous American man flirting in Germany might risk getting a black eye.
okcupid is used by a lot of queer folk here in germany, because it has very inclusive gender/sexuality options
Questions: How do Germans flirt.
Answer: They don't flirt at all.
its the same for guys... you see a girl you like try to make eye contact and if you mamaged that smile.. if she smiles back go over there and start talking wheres the problem? we have a proverb here ... ohne mut keine mädchen which translates more or less without courage no girls and thats just true