An HFY Story : Fair Exchange & Don't. Touch. The. Ships. 2445 ~ Deathworld, War and Humans

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  • Опубликовано: 16 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 149

  • @mikethurman3147
    @mikethurman3147 4 месяца назад +29

    I'm so happy to see an Agro Squirrel / Fat Electrician connection.
    "Don't touch our boats"

  • @albruitstuart8408
    @albruitstuart8408 4 месяца назад +89

    It's what we like to refer to as "Proportionate Response".

    • @grogvaughan5649
      @grogvaughan5649 4 месяца назад +3

      @albruitstuart8408 my line of work we call it the "John Wick Protocol"

    • @NXTangl
      @NXTangl 4 месяца назад +7

      "Proportionate"? No, no, it's a "proportionAL" response. The proportion in question is 1000:1.

    • @grogvaughan5649
      @grogvaughan5649 4 месяца назад +4

      @NXTangl proportionate is the past tense.. as in "we make them a part of history no longer relevant in the present"

    • @albruitstuart8408
      @albruitstuart8408 4 месяца назад +2

      @NXTangl thank you, the yes, the quote was "Proportional Response."

    • @jasonl9682
      @jasonl9682 4 месяца назад +2

      Amen

  • @Practitioner_of_Diogenes
    @Practitioner_of_Diogenes 4 месяца назад +19

    And that second story is when the galaxy learned two American phrases-
    "Don't. Touch. Our Boats" and "Proportional Response."

  • @warhorse03826
    @warhorse03826 4 месяца назад +189

    "don't. touch. the. boats!" habitual linecrosser

    • @cybercifrado
      @cybercifrado 4 месяца назад +9

      Indeed. I heard it in one of his accents. XD

    • @dalemorgan8263
      @dalemorgan8263 4 месяца назад +11

      _Here comes the sun doodoodoodoo_

    • @Aminuts2009
      @Aminuts2009 4 месяца назад +5

      With the appropriate accent of course!

    • @michaelyoung7261
      @michaelyoung7261 4 месяца назад +6

      Truly a man of culture

    • @war13death
      @war13death 4 месяца назад

      Except Israel, they got away with deliberately attacking our boats.

  • @Tiewaz
    @Tiewaz 4 месяца назад +58

    That seems to be the accurate "proportional response" in the second story, yep.

    • @michaellewis3226
      @michaellewis3226 4 месяца назад +7

      Appropriately proportional.

    • @mikethurman3147
      @mikethurman3147 4 месяца назад +1

      "Proportional"

    • @KouuToriProductions
      @KouuToriProductions 4 месяца назад +5

      So the president said, we're going to issue a "proportional" response.
      And what the Navy heard, was "ice 'em."

  • @ArronRatliff
    @ArronRatliff 4 месяца назад +60

    America: Don't Touch Our Boats!
    The rest of planet Earth: Dear God Don't Touch Their Boats!
    Up voted for the beard and algorithm with energy!

  • @Seastallion
    @Seastallion 4 месяца назад +30

    Fun fact: The most powerful navy in history was created because... someone. touched. the. boats!
    True story.

    • @h1n14lifegaming
      @h1n14lifegaming 3 месяца назад

      Not only that they were created to fight off pirates. Fucking pirates fucked up soo bad America said bet.

  • @Wastelandman7000
    @Wastelandman7000 4 месяца назад +46

    We can laugh at them wanting crude oil, but, anyone else remember what the Nostromo was hauling in Alien? Oil and an automated oil refinery.
    Still easier and cheaper to make plastics from oil than from biomass I'm guessing.

    • @Cl0ckcl0ck
      @Cl0ckcl0ck 4 месяца назад +7

      Oil isn't just fuel. Using it as fuel is one of the silliest ways of using it. Most of our medicines for example started out as oil.

    • @danijelandroid
      @danijelandroid 4 месяца назад

      Maybe the humans invented a miracle plastic that rival steal or we created bio-spaceships which consume oil.
      Or the humans were removing the oil so that those aliens won't start wars over it. That would make the most sense if the humans came to the alien planet without any ulterior motives.

    • @1992jkwj
      @1992jkwj 4 месяца назад +2

      ​@@Cl0ckcl0ckarent sulphides made in part with oil as well?

  • @elaniarkady7351
    @elaniarkady7351 4 месяца назад +13

    2nd story: Yup proportional response

  • @BattleshipOrion
    @BattleshipOrion 4 месяца назад +9

    If Fat Electrician, and Habitual Line Crosser went into space:
    Fat Electrician: *TODAY I'M GONNA TELL YOU THE REASONS WHY COMMUNISM IS BAD*
    Habitual Line Crosser: Don't. Touch. The. Boats.

  • @proberts34
    @proberts34 4 месяца назад +13

    An interesting take on the FAFO style of story.
    "FA, and we'll give you ONE chance to make it right, before you FO." 🙂

  • @erushi5503
    @erushi5503 4 месяца назад +6

    Story 1: Probably a merchant fleet looking for oil to sell to traditional car enthusiasts on terran worlds
    Story 2: "DONT TOUCH MY BOATS!!"

  • @carminedesanto6746
    @carminedesanto6746 4 месяца назад +36

    Habitual Line Cosser in SPACE 😆

    • @smugfrog8111
      @smugfrog8111 4 месяца назад +1

      "Ohh shit, there's about to be more Suns out than Tatooine!"

  • @LegendStormcrow
    @LegendStormcrow 4 месяца назад +13

    2 stories about Space America. Noice.

  • @GenStallion
    @GenStallion 4 месяца назад +12

    Lets actually add that to the checklist. Just give us a reason.

  • @Inufan2005
    @Inufan2005 4 месяца назад +4

    Nice to see our boat doctrine made it to space!

  • @ericlestick7325
    @ericlestick7325 4 месяца назад +4

    If you touch our boats we'll have to give a "proportional" response.

  • @bewarethegreyghost
    @bewarethegreyghost 4 месяца назад +10

    Some of these HFY authors watch The Fat Electrician, and it shows.

    • @mattbrown5511
      @mattbrown5511 4 месяца назад +1

      Hoorah. This 11 Bravo upholds that the Fat Electrician is watch worthy.

  • @kurtismiller9544
    @kurtismiller9544 4 месяца назад +8

    For DA SKWERL and his Nest

    • @quoriander
      @quoriander 4 месяца назад +2

      And for his many acorns!

  • @jeanannd
    @jeanannd 4 месяца назад +18

    Story 1: Maybe for petroleum jelly and other such products? Story 2: Good rule.

    • @jonnypena7651
      @jonnypena7651 4 месяца назад +1

      A lot of vegetable alternatives, maybe gas for old collection cars? xD

    • @Norbrookc
      @Norbrookc 4 месяца назад +3

      Oil is very, very useful for making various products. Most of the plastics we use come from oil, in addition to other useful chemicals and lubricants. So after Earth would have burned up or used most of its oil, it would become something you'd still need, so... trade for it from another planet.

    • @nicholaswion846
      @nicholaswion846 4 месяца назад

      @@Norbrookc Most of those products come from the parts of crude oil that are not suitable for energy production, so its not really an either/or relationship.
      The more likely reason, is that regardless of how many other methods of production that they have discovered and developed, with the high level of energy demand that such a society would have, there is simply no beating the cost efficiency per unit of energy ratio that natural petroleum delivers.
      That is an extremely important stat when providing energy on an economy wide scale.

    • @robertstoneking7916
      @robertstoneking7916 4 месяца назад +1

      Likely past large scale energy use but lubricants, plastics, food additives, medications.

    • @Wastelandman7000
      @Wastelandman7000 4 месяца назад

      Probably for plastics and lubricants. If you can make it to the stars you don't need it for fuel. But, you still need to make circuit boards, insulators, and lubricate your machinery and the like. You can make this stuff from vegetable products, but, its a righteous pain and requires a huge investment in both creating biomass and processing it. Probably cheaper and easier to just trade for it.

  • @mackenziedrake
    @mackenziedrake 4 месяца назад +4

    Excellent as always. I worry about the folks in the first one.

    • @seanbolster7603
      @seanbolster7603 4 месяца назад

      It was a pt 1 to the 2nd. Lol. In my head anyway. America wanted that compound 710

  • @commiedeer
    @commiedeer 4 месяца назад

    "Don't. Touch. The Boats!" I totally read that in Mandatory Funday's voice.

  • @jfpalermo
    @jfpalermo 4 месяца назад +2

    Loved the story,... still rolling in laughter at the ending.

  • @EricTheKei
    @EricTheKei 4 месяца назад +3

    For the Squirrelgorithm!

  • @georgepatton93
    @georgepatton93 4 месяца назад +17

    **terrified Japanese noises**

  • @luzifershadres
    @luzifershadres 4 месяца назад +1

    "So, what do you need the Oil for?"
    Human merchant: "Well, a lot of humans like the sound of combution engines. While 90% of combution vehicles run on very safe and envirement firendly fuel, there is an backwards colony in the Bernard sytsem called The New United States of Ford-America (Trademark). These guys not only bioengeenered themself to live with the polution and workship Henry John America Ford the 112th like an god, but also drive around in 20m tall armored truck, running on Gasoline. And yes, there are even bigger 40 m tall monster trucks. Even their mother nation the Northern American States of Terra, calls them lunatics. And that means a lot when we talk about trucks."

  • @barelyasurvivor1257
    @barelyasurvivor1257 4 месяца назад

    Thanks for another great read of a great story

  • @victortahlor4038
    @victortahlor4038 4 месяца назад

    Thank you for the reading

  • @RealArcalian
    @RealArcalian 4 месяца назад

    Greetings, Mentlegent!
    For the Rhythm that is Algo
    Story 1: Humans are Uplifters
    Story 2: Proportional Response

  • @lawrencespruyt5053
    @lawrencespruyt5053 4 месяца назад

    First story, we probably found a way to make ICE space ships. Lol

  • @markshasteen4579
    @markshasteen4579 3 месяца назад

    As an American I can 100% say you don't touch our boats

  • @deussalt4479
    @deussalt4479 4 месяца назад

    For the Agro-rythm!

  • @larsharris
    @larsharris 4 месяца назад

    It’s a shame the lives lost. But often. Fewer lives are lost in total. Rather than a “proportional” response every time.

  • @Jakes3130
    @Jakes3130 4 месяца назад

    Thank you sir

  • @tdofducksplays
    @tdofducksplays 4 месяца назад

    DO NOT TOUCH THE HUMANS BOATS!!

  • @Norbrookc
    @Norbrookc 4 месяца назад +9

    American history... touching America's boats results in very bad results for the country that does it.

    • @cybercifrado
      @cybercifrado 4 месяца назад +3

      Which countries were those? Oh, right. Most have been lost to history. ;)

    • @Aminuts2009
      @Aminuts2009 4 месяца назад +3

      Remember the Maine! ... Takes the Philippines away from Spain.

    • @michaellewis3226
      @michaellewis3226 4 месяца назад +2

      @@cybercifrado Few are still around in reduced capacity. Spain, Japan and Germany.

    • @cybercifrado
      @cybercifrado 4 месяца назад +1

      @@michaellewis3226 Yeah, the comment was meant to be hyperbolic.

    • @wendal4506
      @wendal4506 4 месяца назад +4

      You forgot one of the originals the Barbary pirates

  • @bertcombs9944
    @bertcombs9944 3 месяца назад

    1940s Japan saying I warned you

  • @MidnightSmoke
    @MidnightSmoke 4 месяца назад +2

    Don't touch the ships is a good rule. Here is a like and comment for the stories, for entertaining me, to help your channel grow, to appease the great and powerful RUclips algorithm demon, and get you the recognition you deserve.

  • @markojotic
    @markojotic 4 месяца назад +1

    The idea that aliens come for our resources was always a silly SF trope. There are thousand of times more fuel and water floating in space and easy to get than on a planet.

  • @Tejyasn
    @Tejyasn 4 месяца назад

    Much response. Very proportionate.
    Don't touch America's boats.....

  • @roberthayes7679
    @roberthayes7679 4 месяца назад

    Another great one.

  • @charleswidmore5458
    @charleswidmore5458 4 месяца назад

    nice story for independence day.

  • @shrillcrayfish6168
    @shrillcrayfish6168 4 месяца назад

    Dont touch our boats!!!

  • @allenmorgan1007
    @allenmorgan1007 4 месяца назад

    For the Algorithm, for the Author(s), for the Holographic Voice!

  • @kathybarekman5454
    @kathybarekman5454 4 месяца назад

    Love ❤ your work and your voice ❤ ♥

  • @KroMagnum4
    @KroMagnum4 4 месяца назад

    Excellent.

  • @Therealwanderingyooper
    @Therealwanderingyooper 3 месяца назад

    Yeah don’t touch the states ships, they get…excited

  • @merlinathrawes746
    @merlinathrawes746 4 месяца назад +1

    A space faring civilization needing OIL? Possibly for lubricants, but I can't see it being needed for fuel.
    In other words, keep your hands off or lose your hands.

  • @EAZ36588
    @EAZ36588 4 месяца назад

    Kind of the Brits to give them the warning

  • @johnnyrotten3175
    @johnnyrotten3175 4 месяца назад +1

    4 D 🐿️ ❗ ❗
    4 D author ❗
    4 D algorithm

  • @jmichaelramirez2510
    @jmichaelramirez2510 4 месяца назад

    To make plastic! 😮

  • @andorfedra
    @andorfedra 4 месяца назад

    Second Story: I think the representative should have been from Japan, instead of Great Britain. it would have maximized the irony of the moment.
    Great short stories regardless.

  • @LordMekenshi
    @LordMekenshi 4 месяца назад

    I assume the oil was just a matter of tradition, or so they didn't pollute their air

    • @melkiorwiseman5234
      @melkiorwiseman5234 3 месяца назад

      Oil is used for a lot more than just fuel. Plastics, for example.

  • @McKavian
    @McKavian 4 месяца назад

    If you have not signed the Geneva Convention, we don't have to follow it.

    • @crowgaming2137
      @crowgaming2137 4 месяца назад +1

      actually, we do. Right up to the point the other side doesn't Then, its free real estate

  • @ardillamente
    @ardillamente 4 месяца назад

    Story 2: Operarion Space Mantis

  • @dirtydandirty201174
    @dirtydandirty201174 18 дней назад

    👽

  • @spqrpraetorian
    @spqrpraetorian 4 месяца назад

    A galactic year is about 250 million years, at least from the SOL systems point of view. So that empire existed for 32 billion years?

    • @melkiorwiseman5234
      @melkiorwiseman5234 3 месяца назад

      I'm assuming it was a "galactic standard year" as in "a standard which applies galaxy-wide" rather than "a standard derived from the rotational period of the galaxy."

  • @genericuser984
    @genericuser984 4 месяца назад

    cool

  • @chrisdufresne9359
    @chrisdufresne9359 4 месяца назад

    I could have sworn that the first one was already done by Aggro. Am I confusing Aggro and NN again?

  • @oldbutnotdead1
    @oldbutnotdead1 4 месяца назад

    For the algorithm

  • @christopherg2347
    @christopherg2347 4 месяца назад

    Why are the space faring humans still using oil?

    • @thomasmandell3002
      @thomasmandell3002 4 месяца назад +1

      @@christopherg2347: petroleum based and made products are probably still cheaper than biomass based and made products.

  • @merlinwizard1000
    @merlinwizard1000 4 месяца назад +1

    6th, 3 July 2024

  • @GR3YD3ATH
    @GR3YD3ATH 4 месяца назад

    🚢🚢🚢

  • @TheRealInscrutable
    @TheRealInscrutable 4 месяца назад

    200K

  • @charlesashton6273
    @charlesashton6273 4 месяца назад

    😀

  • @marvinjohnson2488
    @marvinjohnson2488 4 месяца назад

    America has a habit of screwing up any one who touches their boats here. Why would it be different in outerspace?

  • @jbfrank7519
    @jbfrank7519 4 месяца назад

    Fta

  • @beingsneaky
    @beingsneaky 4 месяца назад +1

    hmm you find more hydrocarbons(oil, tar, gases) and water out in space then you would every find on or under any planet so no they did not need to trade for the oil.

    • @Marcus_Postma
      @Marcus_Postma 4 месяца назад

      I was thinking the same thing

    • @ianharrison5758
      @ianharrison5758 4 месяца назад +2

      I assume it would be more of an excuse to open trade. Oil is oil and space may have more but gaining a loyal ally with a later apparent unequal exchange, that’s more valuable than the oil could ever be

  • @t.p.3456
    @t.p.3456 4 месяца назад

    For the algorithm 👽👾🤖🌌🛰🚀🛸🌠