Batman's Contingency Plans

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  • @PrinceOfThieves666
    @PrinceOfThieves666 2 месяца назад +1812

    It's crazy that the contingency for Flash isn't just a bunch of Roadrunner sketches...

    • @TorquemadaTwist
      @TorquemadaTwist 2 месяца назад +80

      His weakness is Acme.

    • @emixam6947
      @emixam6947 2 месяца назад +77

      I understood that reference

    • @pedrotom3015
      @pedrotom3015 2 месяца назад +10

      Or his hearth becoming a nuke

    • @eatmyass
      @eatmyass 2 месяца назад +1

      This guy needs to be reported hes taking solidJJ videos and remaking them word for word then deleting all comments that call him out

    • @drwilyecoyote5357
      @drwilyecoyote5357 2 месяца назад +20

      @@emixam6947 I am that refrence.

  • @Sjono
    @Sjono 2 месяца назад +320

    Flash being a groomer sounds like a dig at Ezra

  • @JDWalker495
    @JDWalker495 2 месяца назад +440

    Everyone else gets a contingency plan, but Batman gets a retirement plan

    • @danielheiger8967
      @danielheiger8967 2 месяца назад +28

      To be fair. How is He supposed to make a Contingency Plan for himself? It wouldn't work since He would know what will Happen

    • @danielanthony6211
      @danielanthony6211 2 месяца назад +6

      @@danielheiger8967 Technically that's kinda explored in Chip Zdarsky's comic book run with Failsafe

    • @Themakerandreverseflash
      @Themakerandreverseflash 2 месяца назад +8

      And terminators

    • @jotheunissen9274
      @jotheunissen9274 2 месяца назад +1

      @@danielanthony6211 Can you please elaborate?

    • @randomdeinternet3582
      @randomdeinternet3582 2 месяца назад +14

      ​@jotheunissen9274 For what i remember, Batman made a robot with every knowledge needed to kill him if he ever breaks his moral code, and then he erased his memory about the existence of Failsafe to prevent himself from stopping it if he ever did become evil, i think Failsafe also can defeat the justice league, probably for the hypothetical case where an evil batman controlled the justice league
      He made a terminator for himself

  • @Vilgax00
    @Vilgax00 2 месяца назад +936

    He is Batman. He has the finest Plot-Armor.

    • @brettwood1351
      @brettwood1351 2 месяца назад +20

      Powered by popularity! So bad I kinda want to see General Zod laugh at a Kryptonite contingency and throw a rock at him.

    • @Vilgax00
      @Vilgax00 2 месяца назад +5

      @@brettwood1351 yeah,that actually what would happend. Or just lazering kryptonite from far.

    • @mizar010
      @mizar010 2 месяца назад +2

      Well, he can afford it.

    • @eon1014
      @eon1014 2 месяца назад +4

      All we need to do is to sic M A R T H A on him.

    • @BLACKRedDragon
      @BLACKRedDragon 2 месяца назад

      He can't resist a clone created from the best girls the buttocks alone will make him go antiquing, the thighs will make poke holes in his condoms.

  • @bigyoshi5170
    @bigyoshi5170 2 месяца назад +698

    Don’t worry, even if Man’s Contingency Plans backfire he has Contingency Plans for his Contingency Plans.

    • @jakubport7361
      @jakubport7361 2 месяца назад +31

      But what about failing the Contingency plan of the Contingency plan. Is he stupid or something? 🤔

    • @bigyoshi5170
      @bigyoshi5170 2 месяца назад

      @@jakubport7361if that happens then Man goes to Aslume

    • @Greenkitten45
      @Greenkitten45 2 месяца назад +25

      His ultimate contingency plan: Alfred

    • @SpectragonYT
      @SpectragonYT 2 месяца назад +27

      The aslume is leaking…

    • @daraghokane4236
      @daraghokane4236 2 месяца назад +2

      ​@@Greenkitten45in the animated Adam West batman movie he was

  • @shadowking9739
    @shadowking9739 2 месяца назад +285

    Wonder Woman's contingency plan is the best. No one wants to be a Starbucks barista.

    • @MarvinPowell1
      @MarvinPowell1 2 месяца назад

      Fans of "The Boys" do. And are. And they also seriously hate Donald Trump, for some reason.

    • @smsff7
      @smsff7 2 месяца назад +20

      She is going to hate learning how to misspell every customer's name.

    • @orbitdraws9770
      @orbitdraws9770 2 месяца назад

      Shup Up ​@@smsff7

    • @TayoEXE
      @TayoEXE 2 месяца назад +5

      GREAT HERA

  • @ferwend719
    @ferwend719 2 месяца назад +93

    0:03 She nailed this line, annoyance and irritation. Real anger

  • @thewhat6219
    @thewhat6219 2 месяца назад +214

    The Flash: He can outrun light, but he can't outrun the allegations.
    And nice mention of Failsafe, who probably just introduces Batman to a load of women in this universe based on his contingency.

  • @StephMak
    @StephMak 2 месяца назад +426

    Batman casually ignoring the fact that The Green Lanterns weakness is yellow and The Flash’s weakness is friction and the Martian Manhunter’s weakness is fire

    • @Greenkitten45
      @Greenkitten45 2 месяца назад +85

      And Wonder Woman's weakness is bondage. 😂
      (Her original canon weakness.)

    • @PJDAltamirus0425
      @PJDAltamirus0425 2 месяца назад +16

      I’m curious, are her bracelets magnetic? Cus if so, then a large electromagnetic pole could beat original wonder woman’s weakness. Hell, nightwinf could cus he fights with poles alot

    • @jamescheddar4896
      @jamescheddar4896 2 месяца назад +3

      words are everyone's weakness really

    • @BrandonPyle-v5m
      @BrandonPyle-v5m 2 месяца назад +1

      I think at this point the weakness has been removed with Parallax freed from the Central Power battery.

    • @eth1987
      @eth1987 2 месяца назад +4

      ​@@BrandonPyle-v5mthat is correct [ for any who doesn't know it's a green lantern thing.]

  • @plucas1
    @plucas1 2 месяца назад +10

    The only reason Batman would settle down and have kids is to farm more Robins.

  • @pumpkingamebox
    @pumpkingamebox 2 месяца назад +55

    “Bitchin”

  • @SHMOUSEY86
    @SHMOUSEY86 2 месяца назад +88

    Crazy as it sounds, that's not a bad contingency plan for Batman. It's why Catwoman called off their wedding in that one run.

  • @dramallama180
    @dramallama180 2 месяца назад +18

    0:29 Ahhh...there it is! I love it when he says that!

  • @GrandmasterDevo
    @GrandmasterDevo 2 месяца назад +54

    WW: What's your contingency plan for you, Batman?
    Bat: Terminators.
    Flash: How is that a contingency plan!?
    Bat: Let me tell you about a little something called Failsafe...

  • @snirkeshet394
    @snirkeshet394 2 месяца назад +91

    Batman's contingency: NIGHWING and the rest of his kids + ALFRED

    • @brettwood1351
      @brettwood1351 2 месяца назад +4

      Shouldn't he have contingency plans for them? Especially after Jason Todd had his falling out with him?

    • @snirkeshet394
      @snirkeshet394 2 месяца назад +7

      @@brettwood1351 he does. They ALL have plans. But they know him better than anyone and have the greatest chance.

    • @orbitdraws9770
      @orbitdraws9770 2 месяца назад

      Shup Up ​@@brettwood1351

  • @paradoxine6287
    @paradoxine6287 2 месяца назад +25

    UndeadHumor just gave Flash the Ezra Miller treatment 💀💀💀💀

  • @simple-commentator-not-rea7345
    @simple-commentator-not-rea7345 2 месяца назад +8

    Sometimes, Batman really feels like an insecure mortal's power fantasy because he hates demigods. Kind of like an even more self-insert'y Rick

  • @Enderception
    @Enderception 2 месяца назад +11

    Superman being so supportive of everything Batman is putting down was unexpected but very funny

  • @beckywilson1550
    @beckywilson1550 2 месяца назад +29

    The flash plan is a reference to something that happened a few weeks again

  • @maestrulgamer9695
    @maestrulgamer9695 2 месяца назад +8

    0:53-Haha,yea.
    Fun fact,Martian Manhunter in the comics has an addiction for "chocos" cookies that are the DC equivalent of Oreos.

  • @talancorwell
    @talancorwell 2 месяца назад +4

    Flash's plan kinda just sounds like turning him into A-Train

  • @dazzlethestar151
    @dazzlethestar151 2 месяца назад +38

    1:29 "Bitchin'."
    -J'onn J'onzz

  • @Bladez10
    @Bladez10 2 месяца назад +27

    Dear lord, Batman is a monster for coming up with these. It's also tamper proof in case actual villains get their hands on them. Wonder Woman would be dead inside by the time she saved up enough money, so killing her would be a mercy.

  • @BillyJacket
    @BillyJacket 2 месяца назад +2

    The Martian manhunters just me when everyone gets into an argument. I'm just sitting there saying I'm hungover😂

  • @tyrellblazer523
    @tyrellblazer523 2 месяца назад +5

    I like how batman's plan is the most simple and harmless out of everyone😂

  • @nacunacato
    @nacunacato 2 месяца назад +2

    "Also Terminators"
    Terminator equiped with contingency plans too!

  • @jotheunissen9274
    @jotheunissen9274 2 месяца назад +1

    "He won't have the time to be Batman"
    Tell that to Catwoman and all the Robins

  • @darkreflection9087
    @darkreflection9087 2 месяца назад +8

    Not the worst contingency plans I’ve heard

  • @jareththegoblinking3191
    @jareththegoblinking3191 2 месяца назад +29

    Green Lantern’s Contingency Plan: Give him a wrapped #2 Pencil. He unwraps it, becomes weak, has to spend time farming in a green field to get his strength back

  • @Partnerzz22
    @Partnerzz22 2 месяца назад +2

    The other justice league: talking.
    Green lantern:
    Manhunter: Everyone I ever known had died…. Just set me on fire damn you!

  • @miriamemanueleforneris3701
    @miriamemanueleforneris3701 2 месяца назад +20

    Even thought this plans are incredibly strange, they are extremly effective

  • @theauditor3224
    @theauditor3224 2 месяца назад +1

    "I have no weakness-"
    "Bondage"

  • @pathfinder011
    @pathfinder011 2 месяца назад +3

    "I prefer the term torture"
    🤣

  • @Draedon126
    @Draedon126 2 месяца назад +1

    I thought Batman’s contingency plan was taxes and alfred

  • @TNuuv
    @TNuuv 2 месяца назад +1

    Gotta love that the parody batman ran it by his team first and they understood that it is necessary just incase

  • @TheBombayMasterTony
    @TheBombayMasterTony 2 месяца назад +3

    These plans are funny.

  • @chadpeterson5698
    @chadpeterson5698 2 месяца назад +2

    The “shut up Flash” joke will never get old.

  • @CyanicCore
    @CyanicCore 2 месяца назад +2

    Half of these plans are more reasonable than their real counterparts.

  • @SilenceInd
    @SilenceInd 2 месяца назад +3

    That Terminator one is true.

  • @milkiassamuel780
    @milkiassamuel780 2 месяца назад +3

    1:05 Honestly that's more accurate to Ezra Miller's Flash

  • @CrayonWithdrawal
    @CrayonWithdrawal 2 месяца назад +4

    It's great how Batman's contingency plan is the only one that has actually worked.

  • @Michael59197
    @Michael59197 2 месяца назад +1

    My contingency plan is dating a meta human female model who has the power to shapeshift into other models and can only be satisfied by me. She also doesn't age. No time for saving the world. Or conquer it. Or whatever.

  • @Graver474
    @Graver474 28 дней назад

    This is basically Solid JJ if Wonder Woman could actually talk.

  • @vadandrumist1670
    @vadandrumist1670 2 месяца назад +1

    I always wondered what would happen if he brought up contingency plans only to find out everyone else had made their own too. Turning evil aside the odds of one of them being mind controlled or an evil alternate version showing up or there just being someone with similar powers means using at least one of those plans is practically a guarantee.

  • @linkmon12
    @linkmon12 2 месяца назад +1

    Kids? Well Bruce you already have a kid and are still batman, don't think that's working.

  • @bendyboy7179
    @bendyboy7179 Месяц назад

    John was probably staring at Wonder Woman helmet for too long.

  • @Godzilla-tu2cd
    @Godzilla-tu2cd 2 месяца назад +12

    His contingency plans got contingency plans 😂

  • @Hitori25
    @Hitori25 2 месяца назад +2

    The whole Justice league sharing 1 Brian cells:

    • @Ron_Jambo_
      @Ron_Jambo_ 2 месяца назад +1

      Brian Cell (Whomever that may be) : "LET ME GO I WON'T TELL ANYONE"

  • @metaemperor
    @metaemperor 2 месяца назад +1

    Not gonna lie the contingency plan for hawk girl is very compelling that or I haven’t had lunch yet

  • @VexSymbiote
    @VexSymbiote 2 месяца назад +1

    do me batma- pause

  • @oriondragonstar7057
    @oriondragonstar7057 21 день назад

    The dead serious nature of Batman makes this even funnier

  • @RasecXelif
    @RasecXelif 2 месяца назад +1

    So my contingency plan is like batman's except im poor AF

  • @BlueBoxRevan
    @BlueBoxRevan 2 месяца назад +1

    Batman: Women. My ONE weakness!
    Hawkgirl: but I'm a...
    Batman: You don't count. Go get me more KFC.

  • @karlgrimm3027
    @karlgrimm3027 2 месяца назад +1

    In the “Kingdom Come “ universe Superman spends years in a simulation of his parents barn.

  • @WyomingPronghorn
    @WyomingPronghorn 2 месяца назад

    This was hilarious! Good job!

  • @hiboi2281
    @hiboi2281 2 месяца назад +1

    that funny everyone bullying flash "shut up flash"

  • @jackovoltraids5937
    @jackovoltraids5937 2 месяца назад

    You got me at the end.

  • @shomgurung3511
    @shomgurung3511 2 месяца назад +1

    well to be fair batman did say his contingency pln is tge justice league he's fine 1on 1with a member of the justice league but more his screwed

  • @dareka9425
    @dareka9425 2 месяца назад +2

    Something's not right. These contingencies sound like they are used while the Justice League are still the good guys. They have nothing to do with an out of control Justice league but when Batman just has had enough of them.

  • @Sg190th
    @Sg190th 2 месяца назад +1

    This is accurate.

  • @romankvapil9184
    @romankvapil9184 2 месяца назад

    Jon actually down with becoming a prison gang leader is not what I expected him to say.

  • @innovator90
    @innovator90 2 месяца назад +1

    😂 Well the prep time is insane now.

  • @ancapftw9113
    @ancapftw9113 2 месяца назад +2

    Batman in 5 years: "I'm sorry, but I believe my morals are slipping. I actually considered killing the Joker after he boiled orphans alive and fed orphan soup to homeless people."
    Flash: "I'd probably want to kill him too."
    Superman: "even i would want to kill him, and it would take a lot for me to kill someone. Like if Joker used Fear toxin to make me think my pregnant wife was Doomsday so i beat her to death. Or something. I'm not good at coming up with evil plans."
    Batman: "well, it isn't normal.for me, so I accepted Talia's marriage proposal and we're going to settle down and raise our son like a normal family."
    Flash: "you sure it's not because you are in your fifties and realize that you're getting too old for this? I mean Talia has the Lazarus pit so she'll be young enough to have kids for the next century, but you..."

  • @someguy3989
    @someguy3989 2 месяца назад

    Ringo : I feel ya bud

  • @ythandlename
    @ythandlename 2 месяца назад +1

    Didn't know making contingency plans would involve a lot about writing stuff a crazy conspiracy guy would type.

  • @TheArklyte
    @TheArklyte 2 месяца назад +5

    ...
    Tbh the Wonder Woman one sounds like something comics would really do.

  • @phantomlantern9169
    @phantomlantern9169 2 месяца назад

    I love how most of the contingency plans are "the public will lose faith in you" and that's really Batman's entire plan

  • @rRD1496
    @rRD1496 2 месяца назад +8

    Dear lord these are Man’s worst contingencies

  • @agentminerchuan007
    @agentminerchuan007 2 месяца назад

    Contingency Plans :- Emotional Damage Edition

  • @neon-brian6155
    @neon-brian6155 2 месяца назад +10

    But seriously, what happened to John?

    • @MelniaShadow
      @MelniaShadow 2 месяца назад +3

      Since he move to voice actor maybe he's still finding one that can do John's voice?

    • @orbitdraws9770
      @orbitdraws9770 2 месяца назад

      Shut Up ​@@MelniaShadow

  • @AmazingZane1
    @AmazingZane1 2 месяца назад +2

    Nah, why you disrespecting Cheetah at 1:17? 😭

  • @channelofbrothers2272
    @channelofbrothers2272 2 месяца назад

    Flash: do me batman do me
    What do you mean by that?

  • @DXDragon38
    @DXDragon38 2 месяца назад +1

    So what about J'onn?
    Lace his Oreos?

  • @zachhendry7926
    @zachhendry7926 2 месяца назад +1

    If dc was like the boys

  • @manthanpatki146
    @manthanpatki146 2 месяца назад +1

    "click on this video to see us comit murder"

  • @ShadowGaming42069
    @ShadowGaming42069 2 месяца назад +1

    1:54
    0:03
    0:31
    1:09

  • @alexschiemann2856
    @alexschiemann2856 2 месяца назад

    Best plan to beat the flash just liter the floor with legos by the time he reaches you his feet will be shredded

  • @edgargaebolg9307
    @edgargaebolg9307 2 месяца назад +1

    Batman's contingency plan for himself isn't that bad compared to the actual one

  • @leventhumps3861
    @leventhumps3861 2 месяца назад

    The only contingency plan he needs is Elastic Man!

  • @Calvanite42
    @Calvanite42 2 месяца назад +1

    Ha! The oreo story was nuts. Who knew a simple cookie was Martian heroin? I wish I was joking but in all seriousness Oreos make martians tweak on a city wide scale.

    • @jlev1028
      @jlev1028 2 месяца назад

      Fun fact: They adapted his Chocos addiction in Batman: The Brave & the Bold but turned them into generic chocolate chip cookies for some reason.

    • @orbitdraws9770
      @orbitdraws9770 2 месяца назад

      Shut Up ​@@jlev1028

  • @Buff_Helpy
    @Buff_Helpy 2 месяца назад

    Martian manhunter is me watching the video

  • @imstupid880
    @imstupid880 2 месяца назад

    To be fair, love did almost get Bruce to give up being Batman in Mask of the Phantasm, so....

  • @ZonaiHero-ul5nm
    @ZonaiHero-ul5nm Месяц назад +1

    0:37 Batman: (cough cough) Piercing weapons (cough cough).

    • @NJ-eo2oc
      @NJ-eo2oc Месяц назад +1

      Actually it was retconned several years ago. tying her up with her own lasso still works though.

  • @RedRad1990
    @RedRad1990 2 месяца назад

    Hawkgirl ❌
    Hawk tuah girl ✔

  • @joestar4267
    @joestar4267 2 месяца назад

    Bro the true of men settling g down

  • @Saladass-kc1hh
    @Saladass-kc1hh 2 месяца назад

    What Batman's doing is an Injustice

  • @sergiokaminotanjo
    @sergiokaminotanjo 2 месяца назад +1

    wheres the gamer sups ad?

  • @jordancambridge4106
    @jordancambridge4106 2 месяца назад

    To defeat Superman: Magic, electricity, kryptonite. To make kryptonite there are multiple sources that give the exact ingredients to make it including in the Lego Movie. I have found 4 spots where they tell how to make it and its the same. Of course you can ship that and just use regular guns because he can't use his power on lead. He can melt the shell around lead to cause it to melt the internal stuff but he can't use his powers directly on lead. What are most bullets made of? Oh yea lead. You see in Superman's universe bullets are made of tin or rarely tiny bits of iron or lesser materials but if they were made of something stronger like lead they would pierce superman like Swiss cheese. to slow Superman down enough use a dog whistle. It hurt his brain and boom Superman down.
    To Defeat Green Lantern paint the bullets yellow and ratatatattataattaattatatatatatatata green lantern is down.
    To defeat Wonder Woman you need a computer set up to display a bunch of holograms and have one guy first shoot at her before the holograms swarm Wonder Woman and they just keep swarming her as she punches them and they turn to vanishing and they swarm her forcing her to fight them for about 3 days when she falls over because of too tired from constantly fighting then bullet to the head and wonder woman down.
    To Defeat Flash: ice the floor and glue as well then mock him and when he run to you he get stuck and ratatatatatatatatatatatattatatatatatatatatatatatatata flash is down.
    To Defeat Martian Manhunter: lighter or matches and a bunch of cans of hair spray and fry his ass like a turkey.
    To Defeat Hawk Girl: Ratatttatatatatataattatatatatatatatatatattatatatatatata Hawk Girl is down.
    To Defeat Batman: I dead.
    To Defeat Aquaman: I deader than dead. People always mock Aquaman but that is because they are stupid. Aquaman has the power to manipulate water, command and take full control over all sea life, he casually lives in pressure that his heavier than the surface of the Sun that is also as hot as the Surface of the Sun which means he has an insane heat resistance while being a water based being, Aquaman can swim as fast if not faster than the Flash can run, and Aquaman's trident can create water out of nothing in large sky scraper sized waves to literally flooding an entire planet in seconds amounts of water meaning if he was to make a water funnel while swimming in it he can literally swim faster than the speed of light and he can easily travel to other planets in other galaxies if in mere minutes if he wanted to. Hell he got hit with a concentrated nuclear blast focused the entire nuclear bomb blast into a micro area and that hit Aquaman perfectly in the face and all it did was knock Aquaman out for a few minutes enough for Aquaman to get some sea water splashed on his face and he was back up and in full fighting capability. If a specialized nuclear bomb can't do more than cause something to have a splash of water to the face wake them up from the attack then yea Aquaman is a serious power house that people stupidly don't realize. Aquaman had his fully down and it took the best sniper in existence to hit him and he still was able to be fully operational a few minutes later. Deadshot has only 2 targets that he ever failed to kill and those were Batman and Aquaman. That is it. Aside from Batman and Aquaman Deadshot has never failed a mission ever. Fun fact: Aquaman has never faced Darkside. Think about it Aquaman is actually physically stronger than Superman and can take hits far better. The only times you see Aquaman fight he kicks ass. Aquaman is a straight up monster when it comes to getting the job done to the point he isn't afraid to lose a limb to get the job done which insane when you thin about it. He even cut his own hand off to save his child and then when he got back he went into the medical spot and didn't even take any pain killers because he can handle all types of pain. Even when he is being operated on he can take pain without pain killers or being put to sleep for the surgery.

    • @NJ-eo2oc
      @NJ-eo2oc Месяц назад

      Non of those things would work on WW anymore. she has limitless stamina and on top of that she has the power to detect illusions via her being the truth goddess.

  • @jjthe13th
    @jjthe13th 2 месяца назад

    OH SNAPP!!!
    I just realized Woner Woman is no longer taking part in the JL shenanigans in lack of voice actress! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @matheussanthiago9685
    @matheussanthiago9685 2 месяца назад

    Martian hunter is just the big lebowski

  • @TheBigE9999
    @TheBigE9999 2 месяца назад

    He already has like 8 kids, i don't think more is going to hurt

  • @LeotheLizardKwing
    @LeotheLizardKwing 2 месяца назад

    Batman, you already have six kids, how many more do you need?

  • @rodan9773
    @rodan9773 2 месяца назад

    Contingency Plan - Code Name - Shut up Flash.
    Subject - Flash.
    Every one will tell him to shut up no one will listen to him he loses confidence in him self goes in to Deep Depression and Run's in to a Pocket Dimension of Solitude.

  • @spunko5491
    @spunko5491 2 месяца назад

    I want Zur en argh to appear in one of these skits

  • @privateeyety5735
    @privateeyety5735 2 месяца назад

    Ahem. Inhales*
    SHUT UP FLASH

  • @waterteafan9264
    @waterteafan9264 2 месяца назад

    Works at starbuck😂 truly horrific
    0:48

  • @comicbookking3446
    @comicbookking3446 2 месяца назад

    How come Green Lantern hasn’t been speaking in these recent videos ?

  • @TamiGeorge-vs1ug
    @TamiGeorge-vs1ug 2 месяца назад

    ‘Shut up flash!’

  • @pysz6748
    @pysz6748 2 месяца назад

    Just thinking, why would he tell them these plans?

  • @metalmario1231
    @metalmario1231 2 месяца назад

    I snapshotted this thumbnail because there was just something hilarious to me about batmans glare with the word "OBESITY" over it