Onion News Network S1E8 - Stock Market Crash

[@landi2244]

We are no more than flimsy machinations of a faltering species floating in an infinite sea of uncertainty.

[@bigdreams5554]

I used to think the Onion has the best actors, but i realize now they have been reporting the real news all along.

[@TBM7777]

Mike Brant (the rising GOP star) is like Trump if Trump wasn't power-hungry and a moron

[@Kentrosauruses]

This is strangely prescient