Your probably a man,.thats why you don't understand this....... and if you are a woman. We don't all desire the same. Some of us just want support, thats it( ^)
It’s selfish to women in the USA. A real woman would know that it’s an honor to help assure that the children feel loved and part of a loving family. The grandmother should feel honored to be looked to as a resource. It’s part of the circle of life. But we’ve broken the family ties. It doesn’t matter how the children get here. The “village” is supposed to make the children feel wanted and loved. Y’all like to make kids feel unwanted. Then the “old” grandmother then wonders why no one wants to care for her as she ages. My goodness how do you folks not understand community. It’s just best for you not to perpetuate the idea that we should continue the cycle of broken and dysfunctional family. Dear sisters y’all are so broken and don’t know it. The USA and patriarchy has too many of you going against your feminine nature. Some of you really have become like fragile males. I really am starting to better understand why the USA is in such turmoil.
Yes! Is this what we’re doing now? Blaming & dropping real tears bc our mother won’t watch the kids? Oh wow! How old is B, again? She looks to be too “long in the tooth” for this childish mindset… 🥴🥴🥴
I bet her grandmother would've appreciated some help with her kids though, and probably got it! You're not entitled to just drop kids on the earth and be done with them after an arbitrary age unless they're really really bad for you.
Single mom, here. Community is so lacking in the U.S. I never had a baby shower, no family around to help, ostracized because I'm a single mom. I totally resonate with this post. I'm older now, and my son is 15. Isolation is the life I'm living.
Because no one is obligated to help you. Yall have babies by bums and think other women are supposed to sacrifice and help you. How selfish and entitled
@@sagba947 honestly, I don’t believe in going to baby showers for single mothers, however, I have definitely bought diapers, clothes, gift cards and put money in the card for the mother. I’ve even come over to their homes to wash and fold the baby’s clothes, get the house in order for the baby’s arrival. The reason I don’t go is because I do believe in a way, we are still supporting not marrying before you carry. It’s not healthy for us to actively choose to begin our children’s lives like that. It’s extremely selfish to say, I won’t take any precautions, before, during and or after sex to protect myself and not bring a child into a world where they will not have a legally agreed upon family unit. If a woman is married and then the marriage ends or leaves before or after the baby is born, that’s totally different but actively choosing to be an unmarried mother is just not smart. You are literally saying I don’t care what my child wants, I want a child so this is what I’m going to do. Also, black women still die during pregnancy, so I’d definitely be damned having a child for a man that didn’t think I was good enough to marry BEFORE impregnating me and possibly losing my life giving birth to our child. Lastly, we always talk about the right to abortion or that we don’t believe in abortion or even that taking birth control is dangerous to the body. Child birth is just as dangerous, if not even more so than taking birth control and yet we choose to do it. So we have to stop having children, before we have built our communities first. Marriage and the wedding/ceremony is actually meant for both families and friends to come together to agree to be your community.
EXACTLY! These women have to be slow and stupid. They’re also entitled. No one is coming to help you. You had that baby by yourself so take care of it by yourself
She did not have to steal to support herself. Sephora's sells makeup and perfume. I could see if she stole from a grocery store. But she's stilling luxury items.
@btaylortv I feel sorry for the girl, but the fact that she was willing to jeopardize her time with her daughter to pay bills (allegedly) is proof that she needs a man. All the stats show that children in 2 parent homes do better economically compared to children in a single parent home, especially if it's a single mother. Telling women that they don't need a man and that marriage and nuclear family is optional for a mother, is setting them up for failure.
I disagree. These days women don't value what marriage has to offer them. We are not all the same. Stop putting everyones personal desires in to one bucks. She needed MONEY, not no whole man. The money.doesn't need to be attached to a man. Stop forcing this monogamic picture
@aishaalign3249 A married mother does much better financially than a single mother. That's the facts. She does need money but the type of money she needs is only gonna come from a stable nuclear family. It sounds like you want the benefits of marriage without the actual thing.
@@mcu4286 There is no such thing as" benefits of marriage" some single people have chosen to not have kids and.be financially more stable then any marriage have. Stop being so stuck. Not everyone want the same thing. Get over it. Her problem is she probably didnt plan for her child. If she did, she could have financially secured herself before having any. Thats what im doing and trust me im totally fine. I don't want the actual thing and im not going to be " shamed" on itt
I think women need to invest in their support systems from a young age. When a time comes that a woman decides she wants to be a mother she needs to go back to that support system and propose this new endeavor. Even when looking for a father for the potential child the support system should be part of that process. And no romantic relationship would not be it. This should be a serious business and process to find a proper donor/father and husband if marriage is a lifestyle the woman seeks. These romantic relationships do not yield desirable results. Just date men as a hobby or something not life altering. Thats just my thoughts.
How can a lesbian give heterosexual women family marriage or relationship advice at all...??? Her community didnt make the child!!! Vetting is for the senior men in a woman life to help her find a suitable man.... Why do our elderly parents who often are dealing with chronic illness and sickness have to spend their time raising their child's children??? All this just to avoid properly vetting a quality husband and creating a healthy family bond... Man can't just run off and leave a woman with children like another woman can. Systems in place in society prevent that ...
I'm sorry, but this is what I don't understand. How can women put more pressure on their friends, than they do on the men they have children with? Let's not pretend that women don't turn on other women for a man...🧐💯
That’s why I am making this video love, not pressure but support their communities. Women are communal but we’ve been programmed to center men instead. Men aren’t capable of handling multiple children even tho they create them. Biological women and men are not the same
tiffanypayne6124 Women try to make the men help, Child support is the most women can get, and even then that is hard.The energy is not there.Mothers need others who care.I know that I would not have made it without my friends, even though I was married, Babysitting, lots and lots of comiseration, a shoulder to cry on loaning money back and forth, celebrating, our babies playing and learning together.. It is the difference between thriving and not thriving,
@@tiffanypayne6124some women haven't woken up yet. this is going to take time. every woman wants to think that her man is different. they're not. most men aren't capable parents. it's not wired in them to care for their offspring. that is not male biology.
Tiffany that is the purpose of women being in community. The whole point of community is that we should never turn on each other and certainly not for a male. If women are in community we have values and accountability to each other. Top of the list would be that women be trustworthy. Women are not centering men but instead focusing on caring for the children who already exist. It’s a process. In community caring for each other doesn’t feel like pressure because it’s balanced/reciprocal. In community we thrive. There would be order and not chaos.
But she’s stealing from Sephora. If she were stealing from Target, Walmart, the grocery store, etc. then laces that carry things needed for survival and hygiene, I wouldn’t bat an eye. I agree community is needed but we also have to stop having children we can’t afford and that goes for both married and unmarried people.
But why are we having children before we’ve even built our community and at the very least have the mo way to “outsource” help??? Building your community technically means marriage because the ceremony itself was used as a way for both families and friends to agree to become your community, help work through difficult times in the marriage and to help raise/guide your children. Even if a divorce/separation occurred, you were still bonded to each through the original commitment made.
THIS IS ABSOLUTELY TRUE…..IVE SAID SIMILAR THINGS SINCE BECOMING A MOTHER….YOUR VILLAGE CAN AFFECT THE MOTHERHOOD JOURNEY SO MUCH…I’m rolling with the punches until I build my village up and connect with those people I’m aligned with but in the meantime I’m not pressed for any man nor am I interested in having another child …one is a lot especially when doing it on your own. Community is hella important!!!
💯💯💯 so true. I'm a single mother and raising twins myself, no break at all. Funny thing about this my mom and ex husband beg me to have kids and my mom never want to babysit, she just called and check up on us, I left my ex-husband because he left me at the Hospital to have these babies by myself and now my daughters barely know my family. God isolate us sometimes show us whats more important. Now my daughters been on the honor roll twice and im writing a book and got promoted at my job but emotionally drained
Well first I want to say, congratulations to you on your promotion and being a beautiful and loving mother! You’re doing so well despite your circumstances and situation. It will all pay off at the end. I pray that you gain a support group of women in your life soon. So many family members and society wants you to have the babies but have no plans to help when the baby actually get here! Mama’s baby, daddy’s maybe is a saying for a reason, sadly. But in the meantime, sending you love and light! 💕
You made some very valid points. I agree 100% about the need for community. HOWEVER, there's no excuse for her to steal from Sephora. It would've been more understandable if it was a grocery store. Food is a necessity. Even then, there are food stamps, food banks, & food drives that many churches have weekly. Breaking the law when you're a parent is a definite no. Jail time means your children are taken from you and put in foster care, temporarily or permanently depending on the circumstances. Terrible things happen to children in foster care that sticks with them for life. Parents need to use discernment and foresight when considering the welfare of their children.
Discernment is either taught, which seems like her mother wasn’t there for her or life teaches you. Stealing food doesn’t help you pay bills. I hear what you’re saying though, I just wish she had a stronger community to show her a different way. 💕
Women are resource dependent (shout out to Professor P) so Women typically steal for financial resources (our neighborhood boosters - check scammers - food stamp sellers, etc). With a community - she would have had other women to reach out to for help. I'm not an officer nor a judge so her stealing is not my battle to fight - but the societal implications of her actions does belong to me '- and am thankful for Btaylor discussing.
@@DearYoungerSelf111 I know why women typically steal🙄My grandma raised 9 kids, living in the projects, working 2 jobs. My mother worked 2 jobs at one point as well. They did what they had to do. Legally. Thousands of mothers in this country do the same exact thing. Not all of them have a community either. Hek, some moms strip-just sayn. That's not something I would suggest either but at least it's legal & mom doesn't risk losing her kids. Stating that "stealing food doesn't pay the bills" is being dismissive & it doesn't hold her accountable for making poor decisions. Let's be real here. Many of these girls are stealing to fund their hair, nails, designer bag, & Friday night clubbing expenses not their basic human needs because there are so many assistance programs out here for that. I have 9 section 8 tenants. Until getting off of the waiting list a couple qof them stayed in shelters. Assistance options they've utilized include public transportation vouchers, free cell phones, free laptops (for school age children), electric bill assistance, clothing, & food donations. I had tenants who got free turkeys at Thanksgiving. One girl asked me if I wanted one because she got 2 lol. Also, Medicaid is another big one- free healthcare & free meds. The point I want to drive home here is---Women shouldn't do things (under any circumstances) that risks leaving their babies mother-less.
Maybe this mother would be in the situation she was in had she picked a better man to have kids by. Tf. Mothers NEED the fathers to help because it takes two to make a baby and two to raise a baby. Leave the community out of it because the community it’s making all these out of wedlock kids and the community shouldn’t have to clean up the mess made by those individuals who were sexually irresponsible. Whatever mess you get yourself into you need to find a way to get yourself out of it. Leave everyone else out of it.
Doesnt matter what a man a woman picks, there is a larger major issue...men are not made to care for children. Most men do not raise children and just leave.
The black race would be over in one generation if women only had babies with great men lmfao, in fact most of the human race would dissapear and then youd still complain about womens choices.. Two people (but honestly 1.5 at best because men are not usually good at child care) is far from enough. This is practically isolation for a child. Thats why people feel so alienated and on survival mode and perpetuate the cycle of not having a community.
This is so sad😢 we really do need this! A place where like-spirited & minded individuals can come together holistically so situations like this would be a past time.
B can you and P think about possibly planning a girls trip or cruise for this summer? I know of a 22 year old that had her 1st baby 3 days ago and passed away yesterday at the hospital. It was my cousins BM. He has 6 kids now and has to raise this one
Truly heartbreaking 💔 I just heard what she said and her reason for stealing 😢😢😢I can relate but except I did NOT steal instead I was doing webcam in 2008 online sex work … I looked for work but nobody would hire me and I refused to get evicted or lose my kids and be homeless again (I was living in shelters from 2002-2003 so I know the struggle is real)
I’m so sorry that you had to go through this, I pray women start helping each other instead of chasing men around. You did what you had to do mama. People shouldn’t judge a situation they are not in cause the tables could always turn.
So glad you made it thru. Prayers for you and all the mamas out there. I've seen a young woman on the train at 9:00 pm, braiding her child's hair so that she can be ready for school the next morning, after picking up her child from the babysitter after work. It can be brutal. God bless all of yall.♥♥
Thank you B Taylor for this video and it is heartbreaking. We have failed as a society, even the churches are silent. There is no excuse this young lady had to resort to stealing and I whole heartedly agree we have to come back together as a community...even a phone call does wonders. I pray that this video will touch hearts where people will be more empathetic and show compassion where even resources are available to help with just the basic needs to survive. 🙏🏾
Yes they do. I have always been an anchor for my family,and still trying to keep it going. All the young moms need is just that helping hand until they are off and running on their own. @@btaylortv
@@btaylortv hey beautiful Taylor, I agree. I am empathic and I hate how society lacks empathy and compassion for other humans, especially single mothers. We are all humans and need a community. One person cannot do everything. I think women friendships are important.
My relatives were the first to bail on me when I fell. I did not even need them for money or a place to stay. I just needed emotional support. I was told to go beg at the feet of the man who pushed me into poverty. The same man who wanted me dead. I am grateful that I did not birth any children into this world like I once wanted. I did not want them to end up struggling alongside me. I do not shoplift. But I know that when I reach a point where I can no longer make ends meet, I will self exit. It is more dignified than panhandling or servicing crusty predator men who offer $5 to do everything with them because some women are desperate enough to go for it due to their severe drug addiction.
Wait….. WHAT?!!! These points aren’t hitting. Furthermore, Sephora sells beauty care products. Why the tears for stealing makeup? Priorities just all fucked up! This is giving delusional. Also, as for being a single mother… choose better, do better ladies!
@@4GoodandEvil Can you even read? I said people can resell sephora makeup for CASH. And a lot of people have job they CANNOT show up to barefaced, even when I was a waitress they would've sent me home!
I'm crying with you BTaylor i lost my mom at a young age and since then i have been alone family is not family anymore. I remember years would go by n i wouldn't get a call or birthday wish from other family members.One reason why i got off social media i would see my mom sister posting all over her boyfriend niece page telling her how beautiful she was. But she wouldn't even say anything under her own niece page. Family got mad at me bc i called them out for leaving me n my sister n brothers without support. They picked and choose who to support. Community and support is definitely needed. I even remember me going through depression after my mom died couldn't even eat had no one to talk to and i had people saying i was on crack bc they didn't understand i was going through depression and even family members calling to see was the rumor true. People dont understand how much they hurt others..
Ugh my heart reading this. I’m so sorry you had to experience that my sister. This is why content like this is so important and I hope it reaches them. Women are too focused on being selfish where they forget about the women in the family who also need help. Sounds like generational trauma. I pray that you find your tribe but you’re apart of my online tribe of women now and we welcome you with open arms 💕💕💕
Thank you for sharing your truth. I’m literally in tears. I’m an elder. I’m so sorry that you were not supported during your time of need. Stay on a journey of healing. ❤ I sincerely hope you find community.
Absolutely 👍🏾 right what you just said women need community and support!!!❤❤❤truly sad the state of the black communities I have never seen something like that except here in USA 🇺🇸 smh 🤦♀️
BTaylor a power word thank you so much for your messages to BW by passing on wisdom of how to make better choices and VALUE being a mom.....and creating a positive life journey ...............
This is very difficult to watch, and to learn that the mother is no longer here to raise her daughter is a terrible outcome that happens far too often. My mother was a community mom, she had a childcare business, and our home became a foster home for many children, so I witnessed many tragedies that resulted from women struggling to parent without a community. Due to these experiences I promised myself never to bring a child here, without a strong community of like minded women and financial independence. Now when its possible, I am Auntie to women who are striving to make better decision for our future. We have attain the knowledge that we need, to learn how to build healthy communities.💯🤔☮️
I agree. single mom with kids, who are done with dusties, should live together. 2nd video - he is lazy. divorce him, make him have custody weekends or weekdays, and he will be forced to do better.
The dusties aren't done with you. Your fates will be forever tied with them through the children you had with them. Also you can't force custody on someone that isn't how it works in any State I know of.
This hurts my heart too. I’ve been speaking on the importance of women being allies and creating community for decades. So much is broken in the USA. It’s why so many women have resorted to isolation and are seeking to leave USA.
So sad to see this young lady in this situation. This world is a cold place. Sorry you are crying BT, I could hear the pain in your voice. 😢😢 Another thing I notice in the bc is everyone is championing for you to have these kids and when you do no-one is anywhere to be found. I agree with this. I been reading articles of a groups of newly divorced women putting their money together and purchasing duplexes and triplexes and helping each other raise their children, look after their kids, with household duties etc. The article I read it was 3 mothers and one was going back to school to secure a higher paying job and the other mothers jumped in and would watch the kiddos whilst that mom went to school. I noticed it was Caucasian women though. I think more women collectively should really think about and consider this. They said their quality of life improved they had a support system and more income. Plus the decision making was equitable. I think its an excellent idea if you can get together with like minded women who are not D dizzy.
They disgusing the phrase "community" as "free labour". Miss mams you created that 👶🏽 you chose to ruin your body and slow down your lifestyle. Stop dragging childfree women into this. It's SELFISH
Princella has B Taylor living on fantasy Island in her mind like Princella. Women need community, and everyone needs community. Is that going to happen in reality? That's just like saying, we all need to live together in peace. Its a good dream, but we know it never going to happen. You need to get back to the real world. You seem like you about to go off on the deep end like Princella.
Why does it need to be a fantasy if it's something you cant see yourself doing? Just because YOUR not interested, doesn't mean that other women who WOULD be interested can't talk about it , and have the conversation. If anything women like you are the reason it wouldn't work because your saying I won't work before it can. Forget princella or B Taylor -- its either you could be involved in building communities for women or not. One thing liberated women DONT need is pickme, anti- women throwing stones on something that has yet to be done especially under a patriarchy before it can even be built. What's really happening is restoring the Matriarchy -- I'm guessing women must be fantasizing about and in over their heads with that as well If we are going to rise up we have to build different communities for every women to nest in. Think about that before you ish on something. If your not a single mom then THIS won't be the community for you, but you will still need another community for women like yourself.
It sounds like a pipe dream but community is realistic and possible. I think communities are lacking in the USA. And you have a good point disantquasar
Absolutely not. First, children are a luxury not a necessity. She can not and could not afford to have any children. Also, women can not burden free and unattached women with the outcomes of their poor choices. Marriage and child rearing are both two of the most important decisions that a person can make. Man or woman, if you choose to marry and mate wrong ultimately you and those children will suffer the consequences and no one is to blame but you.
SMH, women are naturally communal and too many ppl are selfish until it’s them. I didn’t say burden … I said women should have a community of ppl that care.. if you don’t care, then don’t care but also don’t look for that support when you’re alone and need help as well. Marriage is a risk for women period. It’s definitely not guaranteed. Choosing a man in genera is a risk.
@@btaylortv . Women are communal but responsible women are a much better resource. Words like selfish and ideas such as negative reciprocal outcomes are childish weapons used to persuade and shame unattached women when begging won't work. Birthing any children is the ultimate risk.
I’m a woman and I totally agree! They’re irresponsible and entitled. I’m not helping anyone who makes bad decisions in life. And having kids annd being able to support them is 1 of the biggest decisions you can make. I see EXACTLY why black people will be a permanent underclass. The men and women are literally slow and can’t make intelligent decisions to save their lives, smh
I agree. They regret their single motherhood decisions, now are trying to bring down and burden childfree women to do free labour!!!😂this is insane. Funny how it's mainly baby mamas agreeing with her in these comments!
No they don’t…. Most kids who are sexually abused are at the hands of men. Most men don’t spend the amount of quality time with their kids as mothers do. I do agree that boys at a certain age need to go live with their fathers or men who are disciplined for training and rearing.
how do they? when males don’t participate in childrearing..they say all the time that it’s the woman’s job to take care of kids…so they admit they are obsolete or were always irrelevant to the children…very few males are helpful partners✅💯
Children need stability. The gender of the adults providing that stability is irrelevant. The children of gay couples have better outcomes than the children of straight couples because their decision to have and raise children is intentional. Way too often kids end up being a side effect of sex and when that happens, you are more likely to end up with dysfunction and trauma.
![Diggy Graves - Red Vineyard [Official Lyric Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/8Ro085T0mnQ/mqdefault.jpg)
IM A BLACK AMERICAN, ALL THE WOMEN IN MY FAMILY ARE MARRIED TO BLACK MEN AND ARE HAPPILLY MARRIED
Your probably a man,.thats why you don't understand this....... and if you are a woman. We don't all desire the same. Some of us just want support, thats it( ^)
Sorry gurl..You made your bed, lay in it. Its selfish to expect your OLD grandmother to raise your kids.
It’s selfish to women in the USA. A real woman would know that it’s an honor to help assure that the children feel loved and part of a loving family. The grandmother should feel honored to be looked to as a resource. It’s part of the circle of life. But we’ve broken the family ties. It doesn’t matter how the children get here. The “village” is supposed to make the children feel wanted and loved. Y’all like to make kids feel unwanted. Then the “old” grandmother then wonders why no one wants to care for her as she ages. My goodness how do you folks not understand community. It’s just best for you not to perpetuate the idea that we should continue the cycle of broken and dysfunctional family.
Dear sisters y’all are so broken and don’t know it. The USA and patriarchy has too many of you going against your feminine nature. Some of you really have become like fragile males. I really am starting to better understand why the USA is in such turmoil.
EXACTLY. Where is the father????
lack of empathy is the issue. Men are not made to help with children.
Yes! Is this what we’re doing now? Blaming & dropping real tears bc our mother won’t watch the kids? Oh wow! How old is B, again? She looks to be too “long in the tooth” for this childish mindset… 🥴🥴🥴
I bet her grandmother would've appreciated some help with her kids though, and probably got it! You're not entitled to just drop kids on the earth and be done with them after an arbitrary age unless they're really really bad for you.
Single mom, here. Community is so lacking in the U.S. I never had a baby shower, no family around to help, ostracized because I'm a single mom. I totally resonate with this post. I'm older now, and my son is 15. Isolation is the life I'm living.
Same 😒
Because no one is obligated to help you. Yall have babies by bums and think other women are supposed to sacrifice and help you. How selfish and entitled
It’s sad but I have even seen other black women comment on here how they shouldn’t throw babyshowers for single moms
@@rncgsu We give everything we've got to our kids, without hesitation.
@@sagba947 honestly, I don’t believe in going to baby showers for single mothers, however, I have definitely bought diapers, clothes, gift cards and put money in the card for the mother. I’ve even come over to their homes to wash and fold the baby’s clothes, get the house in order for the baby’s arrival. The reason I don’t go is because I do believe in a way, we are still supporting not marrying before you carry. It’s not healthy for us to actively choose to begin our children’s lives like that. It’s extremely selfish to say, I won’t take any precautions, before, during and or after sex to protect myself and not bring a child into a world where they will not have a legally agreed upon family unit. If a woman is married and then the marriage ends or leaves before or after the baby is born, that’s totally different but actively choosing to be an unmarried mother is just not smart. You are literally saying I don’t care what my child wants, I want a child so this is what I’m going to do.
Also, black women still die during pregnancy, so I’d definitely be damned having a child for a man that didn’t think I was good enough to marry BEFORE impregnating me and possibly losing my life giving birth to our child. Lastly, we always talk about the right to abortion or that we don’t believe in abortion or even that taking birth control is dangerous to the body. Child birth is just as dangerous, if not even more so than taking birth control and yet we choose to do it. So we have to stop having children, before we have built our communities first. Marriage and the wedding/ceremony is actually meant for both families and friends to come together to agree to be your community.
Don’t have kids. Simple as that. If you don’t got the money or community, just don’t.
And that is the case. The population of Americans is on the decline - due to inflation.
@@DeshaunTellez
Yep. Just wish low income women would realize that more. They are just perpetuating the cycle.
@@magnarcreed3801trust and believe they do realize and is taking action
EXACTLY! These women have to be slow and stupid. They’re also entitled. No one is coming to help you. You had that baby by yourself so take care of it by yourself
The west is brutal for a single mother. My sister in law (married) is planning to go back to Africa to take a break.
She did not have to steal to support herself. Sephora's sells makeup and perfume. I could see if she stole from a grocery store. But she's stilling luxury items.
I guess she needed to flip the money to pay for a bill?
@btaylortv I feel sorry for the girl, but the fact that she was willing to jeopardize her time with her daughter to pay bills (allegedly) is proof that she needs a man. All the stats show that children in 2 parent homes do better economically compared to children in a single parent home, especially if it's a single mother. Telling women that they don't need a man and that
marriage and nuclear family is optional for a mother, is setting them up for failure.
I disagree. These days women don't value what marriage has to offer them. We are not all the same. Stop putting everyones personal desires in to one bucks. She needed MONEY, not no whole man. The money.doesn't need to be attached to a man. Stop forcing this monogamic picture
@aishaalign3249 A married mother does much better financially than a single mother. That's the facts. She does need money but the type of money she needs is only gonna come from a stable nuclear family. It sounds like you want the benefits of marriage without the actual thing.
@@mcu4286 There is no such thing as" benefits of marriage" some single people have chosen to not have kids and.be financially more stable then any marriage have. Stop being so stuck. Not everyone want the same thing. Get over it. Her problem is she probably didnt plan for her child. If she did, she could have financially secured herself before having any. Thats what im doing and trust me im totally fine. I don't want the actual thing and im not going to be " shamed" on itt
I think women need to invest in their support systems from a young age. When a time comes that a woman decides she wants to be a mother she needs to go back to that support system and propose this new endeavor. Even when looking for a father for the potential child the support system should be part of that process. And no romantic relationship would not be it. This should be a serious business and process to find a proper donor/father and husband if marriage is a lifestyle the woman seeks. These romantic relationships do not yield desirable results. Just date men as a hobby or something not life altering. Thats just my thoughts.
Agree 💯
How can a lesbian give heterosexual women family marriage or relationship advice at all...???
Her community didnt make the child!!!
Vetting is for the senior men in a woman life to help her find a suitable man....
Why do our elderly parents who often are dealing with chronic illness and sickness have to spend their time raising their child's children???
All this just to avoid properly vetting a quality husband and creating a healthy family bond...
Man can't just run off and leave a woman with children like another woman can. Systems in place in society prevent that ...
I'm sorry, but this is what I don't understand. How can women put more pressure on their friends, than they do on the men they have children with? Let's not pretend that women don't turn on other women for a man...🧐💯
That’s why I am making this video love, not pressure but support their communities. Women are communal but we’ve been programmed to center men instead. Men aren’t capable of handling multiple children even tho they create them. Biological women and men are not the same
tiffanypayne6124 Women try to make the men help, Child support is the most women can get, and even then that is hard.The energy is not there.Mothers need others who care.I know that I would not have made it without my friends, even though I was married, Babysitting, lots and lots of comiseration, a shoulder to cry on loaning money back and forth, celebrating, our babies playing and learning together.. It is the difference between thriving and not thriving,
@@khem127 ..🧐 Then why are we still having kids by men? I'm just asking for a friend.🫣
@@tiffanypayne6124some women haven't woken up yet. this is going to take time. every woman wants to think that her man is different. they're not. most men aren't capable parents. it's not wired in them to care for their offspring. that is not male biology.
Tiffany that is the purpose of women being in community. The whole point of community is that we should never turn on each other and certainly not for a male. If women are in community we have values and accountability to each other. Top of the list would be that women be trustworthy. Women are not centering men but instead focusing on caring for the children who already exist. It’s a process. In community caring for each other doesn’t feel like pressure because it’s balanced/reciprocal. In community we thrive. There would be order and not chaos.
I really can’t wait until we actually start pooling our funds and building communities for women!! We have the money. What are we waiting for?
I agree but there is still so much healing to do among women on women relationships 💕
@@btaylortv yeah. Our vetting process and guidelines for women would have to be TIGHT!
@@somebodycomelistentothispo7217 mhmm, because the male centered women scare me! 😂🤣 have to train them properly
That's one of my goals
@@MissTi212 they wouldn’t be part of our community
But she’s stealing from Sephora. If she were stealing from Target, Walmart, the grocery store, etc. then laces that carry things needed for survival and hygiene, I wouldn’t bat an eye. I agree community is needed but we also have to stop having children we can’t afford and that goes for both married and unmarried people.
We seriously as women need to start helping each other and not be scared to ask. Or come to women for help❤ ❤
Where are these kids fathers????
But why are we having children before we’ve even built our community and at the very least have the mo way to “outsource” help??? Building your community technically means marriage because the ceremony itself was used as a way for both families and friends to agree to become your community, help work through difficult times in the marriage and to help raise/guide your children. Even if a divorce/separation occurred, you were still bonded to each through the original commitment made.
THIS IS ABSOLUTELY TRUE…..IVE SAID SIMILAR THINGS SINCE BECOMING A MOTHER….YOUR VILLAGE CAN AFFECT THE MOTHERHOOD JOURNEY SO MUCH…I’m rolling with the punches until I build my village up and connect with those people I’m aligned with but in the meantime I’m not pressed for any man nor am I interested in having another child …one is a lot especially when doing it on your own. Community is hella important!!!
💯💯💯 so true. I'm a single mother and raising twins myself, no break at all. Funny thing about this my mom and ex husband beg me to have kids and my mom never want to babysit, she just called and check up on us, I left my ex-husband because he left me at the Hospital to have these babies by myself and now my daughters barely know my family. God isolate us sometimes show us whats more important. Now my daughters been on the honor roll twice and im writing a book and got promoted at my job but emotionally drained
Well first I want to say, congratulations to you on your promotion and being a beautiful and loving mother! You’re doing so well despite your circumstances and situation. It will all pay off at the end. I pray that you gain a support group of women in your life soon.
So many family members and society wants you to have the babies but have no plans to help when the baby actually get here! Mama’s baby, daddy’s maybe is a saying for a reason, sadly.
But in the meantime, sending you love and light! 💕
I actually she a few tears when she told her daughter “SORRY.” Glad you found this one. Her “friend” wasn’t her FRIEND…
The babies dad family should be there helping. It's so sad the young lady passed away. I pray love of self and strength to her baby thru life😮😢😢😢🤦🏾♀️
The baby father family may be deadbeats as well. I know from experience! Some of the deadbeat dads come from deadbeat families!
You made some very valid points. I agree 100% about the need for community. HOWEVER, there's no excuse for her to steal from Sephora. It would've been more understandable if it was a grocery store. Food is a necessity. Even then, there are food stamps, food banks, & food drives that many churches have weekly. Breaking the law when you're a parent is a definite no. Jail time means your children are taken from you and put in foster care, temporarily or permanently depending on the circumstances. Terrible things happen to children in foster care that sticks with them for life. Parents need to use discernment and foresight when considering the welfare of their children.
Discernment is either taught, which seems like her mother wasn’t there for her or life teaches you. Stealing food doesn’t help you pay bills. I hear what you’re saying though, I just wish she had a stronger community to show her a different way. 💕
Women are resource dependent (shout out to Professor P) so Women typically steal for financial resources (our neighborhood boosters - check scammers - food stamp sellers, etc). With a community - she would have had other women to reach out to for help. I'm not an officer nor a judge so her stealing is not my battle to fight - but the societal implications of her actions does belong to me '- and am thankful for Btaylor discussing.
@@btaylortv "Stealing food doesn't pay the bills." Condescending and dismissive.
@@DearYoungerSelf111 I know why women typically steal🙄My grandma raised 9 kids, living in the projects, working 2 jobs. My mother worked 2 jobs at one point as well. They did what they had to do. Legally. Thousands of mothers in this country do the same exact thing. Not all of them have a community either. Hek, some moms strip-just sayn. That's not something I would suggest either but at least it's legal & mom doesn't risk losing her kids. Stating that "stealing food doesn't pay the bills" is being dismissive & it doesn't hold her accountable for making poor decisions. Let's be real here. Many of these girls are stealing to fund their hair, nails, designer bag, & Friday night clubbing expenses not their basic human needs because there are so many assistance programs out here for that. I have 9 section 8 tenants. Until getting off of the waiting list a couple qof them stayed in shelters. Assistance options they've utilized include public transportation vouchers, free cell phones, free laptops (for school age children), electric bill assistance, clothing, & food donations. I had tenants who got free turkeys at Thanksgiving. One girl asked me if I wanted one because she got 2 lol. Also, Medicaid is another big one- free healthcare & free meds. The point I want to drive home here is---Women shouldn't do things (under any circumstances) that risks leaving their babies mother-less.
@@giggles1219 I’m saying… she stole things to sale to get money to pay for bills. How is that condescending? I’m not saying what she did was right
Maybe this mother would be in the situation she was in had she picked a better man to have kids by. Tf. Mothers NEED the fathers to help because it takes two to make a baby and two to raise a baby. Leave the community out of it because the community it’s making all these out of wedlock kids and the community shouldn’t have to clean up the mess made by those individuals who were sexually irresponsible. Whatever mess you get yourself into you need to find a way to get yourself out of it. Leave everyone else out of it.
Doesnt matter what a man a woman picks, there is a larger major issue...men are not made to care for children. Most men do not raise children and just leave.
The black race would be over in one generation if women only had babies with great men lmfao, in fact most of the human race would dissapear and then youd still complain about womens choices.. Two people (but honestly 1.5 at best because men are not usually good at child care) is far from enough. This is practically isolation for a child. Thats why people feel so alienated and on survival mode and perpetuate the cycle of not having a community.
2:23 groceries! She can’t put a loaf of bread on your child’s butt. Or pay your phone bill with that. This hurts my heart 🤦🏽♀️
This is so sad😢 we really do need this! A place where like-spirited & minded individuals can come together holistically so situations like this would be a past time.
Yes you are so right BTaylor❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
B can you and P think about possibly planning a girls trip or cruise for this summer? I know of a 22 year old that had her 1st baby 3 days ago and passed away yesterday at the hospital. It was my cousins BM. He has 6 kids now and has to raise this one
Now this didn’t age well… 😬😬😬
Truly heartbreaking 💔 I just heard what she said and her reason for stealing 😢😢😢I can relate but except I did NOT steal instead I was doing webcam in 2008 online sex work … I looked for work but nobody would hire me and I refused to get evicted or lose my kids and be homeless again (I was living in shelters from 2002-2003 so I know the struggle is real)
I’m so sorry that you had to go through this, I pray women start helping each other instead of chasing men around. You did what you had to do mama. People shouldn’t judge a situation they are not in cause the tables could always turn.
Thank you for sharing your story with us -
So glad you made it thru. Prayers for you and all the mamas out there. I've seen a young woman on the train at 9:00 pm, braiding her child's hair so that she can be ready for school the next morning, after picking up her child from the babysitter after work. It can be brutal. God bless all of yall.♥♥
Thank you B Taylor for this video and it is heartbreaking. We have failed as a society, even the churches are silent. There is no excuse this young lady had to resort to stealing and I whole heartedly agree we have to come back together as a community...even a phone call does wonders. I pray that this video will touch hearts where people will be more empathetic and show compassion where even resources are available to help with just the basic needs to survive. 🙏🏾
Thank you so much, I pray it definitely does because mothers really do need a community. Too many Ppl lack compassion and empathy.
Yes they do. I have always been an anchor for my family,and still trying to keep it going. All the young moms need is just that helping hand until they are off and running on their own. @@btaylortv
@@Wyntrborn totally agree. It takes a village to raise a child, not just depending on a man 💕
@@btaylortv hey beautiful Taylor, I agree. I am empathic and I hate how society lacks empathy and compassion for other humans, especially single mothers. We are all humans and need a community. One person cannot do everything. I think women friendships are important.
This is horrible. How did she pass away?
They said she got into a fatal car crash after this 😭
@@btaylortv 😱 OMG SIP Just wow...the baby....
@@augustG.I.F I know, that’s what made me cry
That is so heartbreaking 💔
They need everybody except a dude. Crazy
When I complain to my family... There response is "you need a man" ... (U mean a stranger to come fuxx up my life n leech off me) 🤦🏾♀️
A man is a want not a need. Secondly it seems like you pick the wrong men and lack accountability for that.
Who posted this, she’s being humiliated. I hope they started a gofundme for her😢
My relatives were the first to bail on me when I fell. I did not even need them for money or a place to stay. I just needed emotional support. I was told to go beg at the feet of the man who pushed me into poverty. The same man who wanted me dead. I am grateful that I did not birth any children into this world like I once wanted. I did not want them to end up struggling alongside me. I do not shoplift. But I know that when I reach a point where I can no longer make ends meet, I will self exit. It is more dignified than panhandling or servicing crusty predator men who offer $5 to do everything with them because some women are desperate enough to go for it due to their severe drug addiction.
Wait….. WHAT?!!! These points aren’t hitting. Furthermore, Sephora sells beauty care products. Why the tears for stealing makeup? Priorities just all fucked up! This is giving delusional. Also, as for being a single mother… choose better, do better ladies!
You never heard or reselling? Maybe she needs makeup to go to work? Maybe she also steals groceries and clothing?
@@juliennepujol5586 OMG… makeup is not even a necessity! Wow, what a bird! 🥴🥴🥴
@@4GoodandEvil Can you even read? I said people can resell sephora makeup for CASH. And a lot of people have job they CANNOT show up to barefaced, even when I was a waitress they would've sent me home!
5:05 😥 I’m sorry to hear this ; sending you an internet hug
I'm crying with you BTaylor i lost my mom at a young age and since then i have been alone family is not family anymore. I remember years would go by n i wouldn't get a call or birthday wish from other family members.One reason why i got off social media i would see my mom sister posting all over her boyfriend niece page telling her how beautiful she was. But she wouldn't even say anything under her own niece page. Family got mad at me bc i called them out for leaving me n my sister n brothers without support. They picked and choose who to support. Community and support is definitely needed. I even remember me going through depression after my mom died couldn't even eat had no one to talk to and i had people saying i was on crack bc they didn't understand i was going through depression and even family members calling to see was the rumor true. People dont understand how much they hurt others..
Ugh my heart reading this. I’m so sorry you had to experience that my sister. This is why content like this is so important and I hope it reaches them. Women are too focused on being selfish where they forget about the women in the family who also need help. Sounds like generational trauma. I pray that you find your tribe but you’re apart of my online tribe of women now and we welcome you with open arms 💕💕💕
@@btaylortv I Appreciate you💜
😥😥😥
@@khem127 💚👑
Thank you for sharing your truth. I’m literally in tears. I’m an elder. I’m so sorry that you were not supported during your time of need. Stay on a journey of healing. ❤ I sincerely hope you find community.
Correct.
Hey btaylor luv you i agree
Luv you! 💕 thanks for watching
❤❤❤I like the title❤❤❤about to listen and watch
Thank you for watching 💕💕💕
Absolutely 👍🏾 right what you just said women need community and support!!!❤❤❤truly sad the state of the black communities I have never seen something like that except here in USA 🇺🇸 smh 🤦♀️
Other cultures outside the US seems to understand this
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BTaylor a power word thank you so much for your messages to BW by passing on wisdom of how to make better choices and VALUE being a mom.....and creating a positive life journey ...............
This is very difficult to watch, and to learn that the mother is no longer here to raise her daughter is a terrible outcome that happens far too often. My mother was a community mom, she had a childcare business, and our home became a foster home for many children, so I witnessed many tragedies that resulted from women struggling to parent without a community. Due to these experiences I promised myself never to bring a child here, without a strong community of like minded women and financial independence. Now when its possible, I am Auntie to women who are striving to make better decision for our future. We have attain the knowledge that we need, to learn how to build healthy communities.💯🤔☮️
I agree. single mom with kids, who are done with dusties, should live together. 2nd video - he is lazy. divorce him, make him have custody weekends or weekdays, and he will be forced to do better.
The dusties aren't done with you. Your fates will be forever tied with them through the children you had with them. Also you can't force custody on someone that isn't how it works in any State I know of.
Can we do anything to support the little girl or any others in that situation?
This hurts my heart too. I’ve been speaking on the importance of women being allies and creating community for decades. So much is broken in the USA. It’s why so many women have resorted to isolation and are seeking to leave USA.
Come on B Taylor
So sad to see this young lady in this situation. This world is a cold place. Sorry you are crying BT, I could hear the pain in your voice. 😢😢
Another thing I notice in the bc is everyone is championing for you to have these kids and when you do no-one is anywhere to be found.
I agree with this. I been reading articles of a groups of newly divorced women putting their money together and purchasing duplexes and triplexes and helping each other raise their children, look after their kids, with household duties etc.
The article I read it was 3 mothers and one was going back to school to secure a higher paying job and the other mothers jumped in and would watch the kiddos whilst that mom went to school. I noticed it was Caucasian women though.
I think more women collectively should really think about and consider this. They said their quality of life improved they had a support system and more income. Plus the decision making was equitable. I think its an excellent idea if you can get together with like minded women who are not D dizzy.
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My baby father mom always run and tell him stuff I tell her but I learned not to tell her sht$ and she is a pickmesha smh
Why do you have a baby daddy to begin with?
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This is heartbreaking 💔
I hear you Btaylor. Yes Mothers should have community support but that should never trump a Man. community has no obligation to mothers nowadays
They disgusing the phrase "community" as "free labour". Miss mams you created that 👶🏽 you chose to ruin your body and slow down your lifestyle. Stop dragging childfree women into this. It's SELFISH
Princella has B Taylor living on fantasy Island in her mind like Princella. Women need community, and everyone needs community. Is that going to happen in reality? That's just like saying, we all need to live together in peace. Its a good dream, but we know it never going to happen. You need to get back to the real world. You seem like you about to go off on the deep end like Princella.
Shut up. Y’all don’t give a fk about women.
Why does it need to be a fantasy if it's something you cant see yourself doing? Just because YOUR not interested, doesn't mean that other women who WOULD be interested can't talk about it , and have the conversation. If anything women like you are the reason it wouldn't work because your saying I won't work before it can. Forget princella or B Taylor -- its either you could be involved in building communities for women or not. One thing liberated women DONT need is pickme, anti- women throwing stones on something that has yet to be done especially under a patriarchy
before it can even be built. What's really happening is restoring the Matriarchy -- I'm guessing women must be fantasizing about and in over their heads with that as well If we are going to rise up we have to build different communities for every women to nest in. Think about that before you ish on something. If your not a single mom then THIS won't be the community for you, but you will still need another community for women like yourself.
We'll have peace 1nce we decenter the chaos my love 😌😂. It's a new world, stay positive and put in some work to make it better.
@MissTi212 It's a new world with people with the same old emotions. Long as people have emotions you will have the same old attitude. Good luck.
It sounds like a pipe dream but community is realistic and possible. I think communities are lacking in the USA. And you have a good point disantquasar
Yes hyenas now you are thinking.
But here you are, all in our business … y’all just can’t stay away 🙄
Hyenas don't have any business only 🐒 business!
Absolutely not. First, children are a luxury not a necessity. She can not and could not afford to have any children. Also, women can not burden free and unattached women with the outcomes of their poor choices. Marriage and child rearing are both two of the most important decisions that a person can make. Man or woman, if you choose to marry and mate wrong ultimately you and those children will suffer the consequences and no one is to blame but you.
SMH, women are naturally communal and too many ppl are selfish until it’s them. I didn’t say burden … I said women should have a community of ppl that care.. if you don’t care, then don’t care but also don’t look for that support when you’re alone and need help as well.
Marriage is a risk for women period. It’s definitely not guaranteed. Choosing a man in genera is a risk.
@@btaylortv . Women are communal but responsible women are a much better resource. Words like selfish and ideas such as negative reciprocal outcomes are childish weapons used to persuade and shame unattached women when begging won't work. Birthing any children is the ultimate risk.
83npat Wow you’ve mastered judging others!!!! How is this skill useful in society??? Enlighten us.
I’m a woman and I totally agree! They’re irresponsible and entitled. I’m not helping anyone who makes bad decisions in life. And having kids annd being able to support them is 1 of the biggest decisions you can make. I see EXACTLY why black people will be a permanent underclass. The men and women are literally slow and can’t make intelligent decisions to save their lives, smh
I agree. They regret their single motherhood decisions, now are trying to bring down and burden childfree women to do free labour!!!😂this is insane. Funny how it's mainly baby mamas agreeing with her in these comments!
I empathize with her. But this dont got Nothing to do with a man. I cant believe you B Taylor. You man bashing now?? WTF?? SMH! 🤦♂️
Your ego is hurt that you cannot grasp this message because it wasn’t for men, it was for women.
MOTHERS DONT NÉED A MAN, THE KIDS DO💯💯💯😎
No they don’t…. Most kids who are sexually abused are at the hands of men. Most men don’t spend the amount of quality time with their kids as mothers do. I do agree that boys at a certain age need to go live with their fathers or men who are disciplined for training and rearing.
how do they? when males don’t participate in childrearing..they say all the time that it’s the woman’s job to take care of kids…so they admit they are obsolete or were always irrelevant to the children…very few males are helpful partners✅💯
@@btaylortv WHEN I SAY MAN I AM TALKING ABOUT THE FATHER, SO THEY DO NEED A MAN
@@rahzikashiharris9539 Fathers Hurt, molest their kids too. Women are communal by Nature so she’s right women Need each other
Children need stability. The gender of the adults providing that stability is irrelevant. The children of gay couples have better outcomes than the children of straight couples because their decision to have and raise children is intentional. Way too often kids end up being a side effect of sex and when that happens, you are more likely to end up with dysfunction and trauma.
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