Samantha Derrick 1st of all, I'm a chick. Second of all, I just don't get jealousy all that much. If they're not responding to the flirting then why would I care?
Bj Tibbs if you're stupid enough to trust a man with another woman, well let's just say it's mindset like yours that contributes to divorce rates. you're supposed to protect your relationship not pretend like you're fine and dandy with some woman grinding up your husband.
Bj Tibbs coming from a guys perspective like the woman in the vid said "women and men are naturally drawn to eachother so the more you open up to each other the more we get attracted" and that's actually very Tru I had a girl as a best friend and she was dating my guy Best friend and I wanted us to stay as friends but more and more as we opened up towards each other she got attracted to my personality and I got attracted to hers and that was probably the biggest mistake I made I honestly believe it's my fault that she ended up cheating on him with me, because I shouldn't have been best friends with a girl in the first place it's hard to keep emotions between you and a girl normal. Love just comes naturally between how big the bond is. With guys the main code is to never let some girl come between y'all bruhh and I broke that with mah nigga😪 it's always gonna be M.O.B from now on if you don't know what that means search it up🙌🏽
@@KingmRomeo not usually no. The men that do that are often taller than the women. As someone who is short I deal with it all the fucking time and it's always men. Shut up.
I have really close friends that are guys and one that I'm very close to. I met his wife a couple years ago and it was SO awkward. I'm still close to him but I respect her discomfort. I don't call or text as much as I used to because it gets confusing. You can have male-female friendships easily, but... your bf/gf should be the person you call your best friend. I admit to getting a little jealous when my bf confides in one of his female friends but I also know that they knew him before I did, and they aren't a threat.
personally, I think that if you have close friends of the opposite sex then you should be together, stop breaking the boyfriend/girlfriend's heart and wasting their precious time that's disrespectful asf .. btw ima guy
I'm a straight male, and most of my close friends are women. My fiancee is a straight female, and most of her close friends are men. We trust each other. We have a very happy relationship.
It works, the problem is women and men tend to make it awkward after one of them makes a move. Girl rejects the guy, guy continues on like it didnt happen and still wants to be friends. But the girl cant get over it, then treats him like all the other guys shes rejected and stops being friends with him and vice versa. All you have to do is both say "Okay we are still friends" and move on. I grew up with a bunch of female friends...did I want to date some of them..sure, did I over step boundaries once or twice sure. But we just acted like it didnt happen. I've even had female friends where we'd sleep in the same bed and not touch each other. People just dont know how to talk to each other. It's always a communication error. You can have male friends, you just dont want to. Either way once you're in a relationship it becomes an issue for your partner anyways being close to a friend of the opposite sex if you dont ensure they both become friends too. Some relationships I've been in it was like the woman wanted to keep me away from her male friend. Usually it was because she was telling him private things about the relationship. Trust me, Im very skilled at talking to people and good with relationships. If you want or have male friends never use them to talk about your relationships with other men because in their mind it gives them the impression that you would possibly date them. Just like your female friends that want to score brownie points with you, they will purposely try to sabotage your relationship with ill advice and worst case scenarios. I know girl code and guy code because Im naturally good with social engineering. In short...most people arent good with being friends with the opposite sex because they don't set clear boundaries and often purposely leave things open for interpretation.
My husband has female BFFs and they eventually became my friends. I trust my husband. I don't have any male BFFs, but he has never had an issue with me talking to my male friends. My husband is also my best friend. It's about trust and love more than anything. If you don't have that you are with the wrong person.
Yes youre smart and you let her hang out with you and family as a group outing or something. What Tahj was talkin bout was why cant he have a female friend on the side like when hes alone hell naaah
Ding ding ding. I work in a place where there are A LOT of males around me of all ages. While yes there are some good faithful loyal men there, there are also A LOT who aren't. I have encountered SO MANY married men and men with girlfriends who have hit on me. A lot. I think if people realized how often this happened they would be shocked. It is not always the sleezy players who are doing this. I have even had the "good guy" who had stable long lasting relationships, confide in me that he was attracted to me and make jokes about how he wants me to "be his baby mama". All while he is living with his girlfriend and posting on facebook about how much he loves her. Again, not saying ALL guys are like this but the amount that are, is staggering. Women are just as bad too
Samee I feel like if your male friends create bonds with you they end up liking you so much for your personality or at least I think it's personality because I ain't pretty.
MAN WITH THE HAT IS ON POINT, PREACH IT. No one has the right to act like they own someone, especially if driven by insecurity. People don't own or posses each other.
I had that insecurity because of past relationships. Rather than shaming me for being uncomfortable with him talking to other girls, he helped me through it by listening and adjusting how he behaved around women. It allowed my insecurities to listen. Good relationships help each other grow.
I agree with the woman that spoke of "herself being her husband best friend"... As a man, If your childhood best friend is a woman/girl, and you are so close that no other woman would break up your relationship, then they should get married to each other... No need to have sex and marry a different woman, with your childhood "girlfriend" (soulmate) in your life... that is a threesome and a waste of her time...
Agreed! Your best friend should be your wife. If it's some1 from childhood, we're all grown ups now & have naturally evolved from that stage. And so, should be some1 you see infrequently out of respect to your wife. We unfortunately now have a culture that place much value on the spirit of the union.
When a guy and girl are close friends eventually one starts to like the other..this happens in MOST cases so it happens too often for it not to work out as them being close friends. Having a guy or girl acquaintance while in a relationship is fine but not someone you spend a lot of time with or tell your feelings or secrets to..that opens the door for opportunity for the other person liking you if they are already attracted to you.
WEAK AND INSECURE! yesss!!! It's all about TRUST! You can be friends with anyone as long as you and your partner trust each other! Some of my greatest friends are boys and that never bothered my boyfriends. It made it more fun for us to all hang out, actually. Hahaha :):) Point for the men!
I feel the same way...but when guys have female friends???? even when I simply left it alone and trusted who i was with it always came back up as drama. Women can have a man as her friend for various reasons and not have any type of sexual attraction but men are naturally different. It's just like the double standard of men saying women can't have multiple sex partners and still be a lady but men can and its ok . I just feel it works for females to have male friends but men...no. But then again maybe that is just my own experience with different bfs having female friends and having it always come back to bite me in the ass.
I'm sorry to tell you this but as a guy I know for sure from the vast majority of men I have known and myself that we can't be just friends with girls that we find attractive. It's always on the back of a guy's mind if he find a girl attractive. The ones who don't they gotta have strong religious motives and principles of loyalty that are very very rare. Being friends that you might meet once a month or say hi to and talk for five minutes is different from someone you talk to all the time and meet with several times a week alone. Trust me what that guy said at the end that he would agree that his wife should take a close best friend male who's straight is just not honest and wouldn't stay calm when he sees his wife going with him all the time.
These women were blowing things way out of per portion of course men and women can be friends. I'm a girl and I prefer to have boys as best friends,people always say " Well your just being friends with them because you just want a boyfriend." That's no true girls just complain to much..Yea that was true that when women go through hard times there gonna see that man for support and may have an attraction you just need to be man enough and know where to draw the line.
interesting......so your telling me if you went to your male "friends" and told them to date you or sleep with you they would say no? A STRAIGHT MAN CANNOT BE JUST "FRIENDS" WITH A ATTRACTIVE WOMEN!
Never again will I date a guy who has a female "best friend" my boyfriend ended up sleeping with his "best friend" only when I became his girlfriend is when she wanted to start hooking up with him. She was jealous. Never again.
This is what I hate. People always just think that, even during childhood, "If a guy and a girl are friends, they WILL get into a relationship". And because of this thought process the two friends feel like it's necessary to get into a relationship. What happens next? The whole thing is ruined. This is also why the people want to become best friends with the exes. Because that's how it was and how it was supposed to be. They already know from past experience that trying a relationship again ISN'T GOING TO WORK. So people need to stop worrying if their partner is cheating. Why would you be in a relationship with someone if you fear there is even a chance of cheating?!
Guys can have female bestfriends Especially from childhood, i understand that somepeople starts relationships later in life but... It take disipline and practice
I have a best friend that's a male? We're like fam!!! He have a girlfriend and she's totally fine with it. They also have two kids. and they know me as the best friend of their father!
It's just old mindsets that men and women can't have a healthy relationship without sex or romance involved, unless family ties. I personally think that's foolish and impractical. I have both a male and female best friends and would walk on fire for both of them. And she could help me move a couch. Idk if the white guy made a fail attempt at that joke reasons why he would have a women as a friend, basically saying you all as weak, emotional and unstable entities.
@@devinngeorge Some people (men and women) have had experiences that make it hard for them to mentally rationalize it as just friends. I had that insecurity for a while and it ruined a relationship, but my current boyfriend took the time to understand the background behind it. He changed how he interacted with the girls in his life and helped me grow. Now I'm not insecure about that at all. True caring partners help each other grow not disregard it and shame those feelings
THIS IS SO IRONIC BECAUSE TAHJ PLAYED TEDDY ON FULL HOUSE AND HE WAS MICHELE'S BEST FRIEND AND THEY EVEN HAD AN EPISODE WHERE TEDDY TALKED ABOUT THIS LOL
You can totally have a guy or girl bff as long as lines have never been crossed. I have a guy bff who I've been friends with (off and on) for about six years, we are both in relationships and there's no problem. There has never been flirting or anything physical. The only time things become a problem is when it becomes physical or someone gets emotionally involved. And guys can totally have girl bffs as long as no lines have been crossed. If you have a girl friend who you've slept with or made out with, I'm not comfortable with that. Not because I'm insecure. Because there is a PAST, a HISTORY. Doesn't mean it won't happen again.
So from what you said it came physical and emotional at some point? We are talking of best friends not just normal guys you know as friends. I don't believe it works. If they don't show it, they feel it. I felt it but I always had the decency to not show it and keep it to myself and it wasn't easy but I managed but this wasn't because I didn't have feelings. It's because I had principles that people around me found it hard to adhere to.
Not true. If they had been intimate once say, then maybe it wasn't great or didn't mean anything. If the best friends haven't had sex before there is just as valid an argument that one of them is truly in love with the other.
That's because they're getting their point across first before they talk and you know what I think many videos where Bethany has interrupted the guy so you know what equality
I am a girl and have a boy best friend he doesn't have feelings for me and I don't have feelings for him. I think you need to trust your partner if they cheat you know their jerks.
Speak for yourself. I'm a man too and the majority of my friends are women. I didn't do it on purpose, it's just how it panned out. And there's nothing sexual about our relationship.
Well I can answer this, Im a mixed race male my best friend is a white female been friends for 25 years since age 5. I don't even refer to her as my friend I refer to her as my sister and so do my sibling's, our relationship was never sexual as she is my sister, as for my wife when we first started dating she's never had a problem with me having a female bestfriend because not only was my sister in my life before her but because it was her who introduced us in the first place which is one of the perks of having a wingwomen, also at my wedding I didnt have the traditional bestman instead and ofcourse I had my sister my bestmate even my wife doesnt care if I call her my bestfriend unlike the insecure lady in this video, sorry for the long story but just wanted to say its possible for a guy to have a genuine friendship with a female as in my case that female best friend played a huge role in my wife and I falling for one another which I will be forever grateful. cheers, thanks for listening =)
I agree with you that guys and girls can be friends, it depends on the people, it's not for everybody. Sometimes I get along better with guys more than girls depending on the situation. Thanks for sharing your story.
Oh thanks for reading my post, I asked my wife for her input on this subject and she told me that it's easier for her to except my friendship which started from childhood but her advice to women was to be-friend the female best friend that way you can keep tabs on your guy, I can confirm it gets annoying.
I am married and I have a guy best friend that I've had since I was 15. we don't talk everyday but I love him like my brother and he is always honest with me and sometimes gives me in site when I'm having trouble with my husband. not to mention I just get along with guys better. Now, the rule in our house used to be that he could have chick friends if they were his friend before I was in the picture, but now that we've been married for 6 years that's kinda ridiculous. Now he can have chick friends if he tells me up front ALL about them and I get to meet them and we hang out. I work with guys I make guy friends easy, my husband works off, so before I had my baby I would go out to eat with my guy friends just to not come home and eat alone. I paid for my meal and we work 10 hour days so I ate breakfast and lunch with them why not dinner? my husband trusts me and in the end that's what counts.
From my experiences men and women cant be friends because eventually one of them (or both of them) will fall in love with the other and if the other wont feel the same, the relationship (friendship) will be over.
Man with the hat: "You're already coming from a place of insecurity, YOU"RE ALREADY COMING FROM A PLACE OF INSECURITY" Tahj: "Not you!" Man with the hat: "Yes her, HER!"
I agree with the last girl. A woman confides in a man and wants to get involved physically to fulfill her emotional needs. What if she starts getting attracted to him past platonic feelings? I dont know if I could handle knowing a guy cheated on me. Someone would wind up getting hurt and it won't be me.
All I have to say is. MAYBE. If you're just in a casual, loose, fun relationship than sure. But if we're getting married there shouldn't be anything you tell ANYBODY else before me as your fiancee, wife, or committed relationship. This goes with male and females.
I have loads of guy friends. And they're just as good friends to me as my girl friends. My guy friends call me and ask me out to watch sports and have a drink, we talk about girls, guys, life, movies, music, school, work, politics... anything I'd talk to my girl friends too. And no, I've never slept nor am I going to sleep with my guy friends.
it aint about ur husband cheating, it's about what that female best friend will do. no matter how much u trust ur husband, u can't control that female best friend from liking him, can you?
I don't think it has anything to do with female insecurity. My male friends ended up falling for me at different times of their lives, and they were in commited relationships... Even with putting boundaries, humans will get attached to the comfort someone may provide, when your significant other isn't.. That was my experience.
lol, fact: women JUST don't want their GUY to have a female BF. No ifs, no buts XD. And yes, I am a male with a female BF, but we both respect our relationships. And should it not be the case, we put each other in our place. I sure did. The last lady from the audience gave a much more realistic point about opposites attracting. It's true. However, I believe and have always lived by this, that when really committed to the partner, you WILL respect your relationship and draw the line between you and your BF of the opposite sex. It's hard at times to trust the friendship between your partner and his/her bf of the opposite sex. Not really because you have doubts about your partners fidelity but rather more about the best friend's intentions. That's where trust is put to the test; trust in the partner's promise of fidelity to you. When it comes to marriage, that's when things change and I agree with the other lady that came with a spouse's point. Your spouse is supposed to be your best friend in this case, because you share everything with your spouse on every level. You are supposed to give yourself a 100% to your spouse and vice versa. That won't work with a female/male wingman on the side, lol.
Actually it's possible to have a girl bestfriend! It all comes to the amount of respect you have for that girl. If you respect the girl really much and the relationship she is in, then she can really be your bestfriend 😐 Yes men works differently when it comes to women, but it all amounts to self control 👌.
Guys can have multiple female friends even married. Doesn't mean they're sleeping around. People have insecurities that's why they don't want their husband/wife to have female best friends.
I’m a girl. Had a best friend for years. Then it turned out he liked me the whole time, “I” just didn’t realize that, but he knew. So girls if your curious pls ask your best friend if he likes you/ever had and if you like someone of course you’d like to know them better like in more than friends!
Anyone that has a problem with their partner (male or female) having a best friend of the opposite sex is insecure! Either your partner is over flirtatious or has done something to make you lose trust in them. Either way, maybe you shouldn't be with that person. One of my oldest, best friends is a woman and I would NEVER stop being friends with her because of her gender.
A married man or woman should be free to have opposite sex friends, but their best friend should be their spouse. During times of emotional need for the friend If the need for the friend, the married couple should be there for that person as a couple, not just as two separate people. They should go to that friend's home together, or they should arrange for the friend to come over when both can be there. One should not let their spouse choose their friends for them, but the "rules of engagement" should be observed. Telling your spouse where you're going, with who etc. If that trust is missing and you can't go out with people from your ring of friends then there is likely a problem in the marriage.
Naturally men and women attract. A best friend is someone who you'll see on a regular basis and talk to on a regular basis. As humans that go through things, sometimes emotional mistakes happen, which is why your woman is supposed to be your best friend, especially when she becomes your wife. I'm not about to chilling all day, while my man is under some woman alone calling him best friend, holding each other when they cry an sharing secrets. It's weird
she could've articulated it better. I would've explained first the intimacy is not just sex. Intimacy is closeness, affection, and emotional connection. The girlfriend or wife replaces a mans female best friend... because the closeness and emotional connection for the sake of the relationship, should only be shared within the relationship... not on the outside of it with someone else.
The last guy to point at the last woman was right: emotionally cheating. They don't have to be sexual feelings, but that loyalty, affection, and endearment is taken from the significant other with an opposite sex best friend.
Not marries but when I asked successful married ppl that is what they say. it may have not started that way but eventually it ended that way because it just made sense that the person you build yourr life with should be the person you share your most intimate thoughts and the person that encourages and understand the challenges your face simply because you are in the same literally boat
Nellie K. Adaba that may explain why ppl divorce just because they grow apart. Personally I think it is scary to imagine that I cannot be friend with the person i proclaim to love and I decide to spend my life with. if they cannot be a friend why even marry them? if we cannot connect emotionally and be vulnerable with each other, why should we even consider a lifetime together? if i cannot trust you with my life, how can i show you my nakeness and sleepn wake up with you every night?
Your spouse can be your best friend, but not your only best friend, and you can have best friends outside of marriage. There needs to be trust for intimacy and to confide in the spouse or whoever.
If you are " MARRIED " and I am, I say Hell to the Naw ! Because we as men are attracted to females in a completely different way. We first are attracted to you sexually then over time the emotions may happen. Women start from the emotional side then are drawn or attracted to the male after he has met or emotional side . For instance men will cheat for sex the female will cheat when her emotional needs aren't met. Especially a brother ! I don't trust no man around my wife, because I know what men do! I don't have female friends......
While dating I believe that having a best friend of the opposite sex is perfectly fine, but upon marriage, the spouse should be your best friend. The friends that are of the opposite sex then turn into a friend and that friendship can remain provided it doesn't cross boundaries. Insecurities really do cause problems in marriage. It also is difficult to be married and to have your role with your spouse be replaced by a friend of the opposite sex. That should never happen. If it does then there needs to be counseling or a very candid conversation.
Guys win it for me, i don't know why things cannot be just platonic? I mean listening to all these people, it's either they 1) watch too much tv or 2) speak from experience or heard about it before . Thats why they dont believe that guys and girls cannot be best friends, but it has happened before and i am best friends with a girl, who i treat as my older sister that i will never have
My best friend of over 20 years is a guy.This has caused problems for both of us in previous relationships because of our ex partners insecurities. The constant suspicion and lack of trust caused the end of quite a few relationships for both of us. We are lucky enough that we have both found amazing people that have no problem with us being best friends. I'm married with a child and G is engaged with children. My husband has more female friends than male and I have no problem with it as I trust him. I think it is very simple if you trust your spouse why would you worry and if you don't trust your spouse why are you married!!
This is such a contested subject. I guess it comes down to the individual. Boundaries play a huge part. For some, it open all the way, and for most, they ain’t down with it. It’s not all about insecurity. It’s also about giving up quality time and energy to spend with another dude/chica. For me, and many others., keep your bestie, I’ll/we’ll get another. There’s only several billion people to choose from.
My wife has guy friends. She doesn't hangout with them but when we have gone to places and they were there I knew it was all good. I think one liked men and the other was legit acting like a friend as well. She knows I have life long friends who are girls and she likes them. All is good. Some people can't tho
i'm not ,i'm just saying women can have male friends ,and men can have female friends ,i know couples who have good marriages and and hang out with opposite genders .do you remember billy crystal in when harry met sally .he had great theory that men and women can be friends and not allow any b.s. drama get in the way
T T Today's world? Lol. There was never any reason for men and women to be friends. The only reason men stick around women is because they wanna bang them. Plain and simple.
I definitely see both sides of the topic. Yes, men can have female best friends; however, like the last women pointed out, if one is more emotional than the other, then it could lead to something more.
I feel that you can't have a female or male best friend. It's true about emotional attachment. I think if your single and mingling. But not when you are in a relationship or married.
I think there was a lot of confusion there. Yes your lover tends to become your BEST friend but if you have a bunch of friends and, as a man, your closest friend is a female, I don't think your woman should have a problem with that as long as there is trust. I would have no issue with my guy having a female best friend. I also think guys should realize their girls may also have that same thing with another guy. It's like expecting your boyfriend, as a gay man, to drop all his gay friends or your girlfriend as a gay woman to drop all her female friends...
I personality wouldn't won't my man being friends with other women lol I'm a jealous bitch. But if it was a childhood best friend I probably wouldn't mind because I think it should be boundaries there!
How strong is your relationship? I'd trust my significant other to be anywhere, with anyone, for any amount of time. If I were with someone I knew or trusted less I'd feel differently.
im a happily married woman and I have a male best friend he is my best friend because we have lots of similar interests and make great sounding boards for information with different points of view on the same topics we both happen to care about and our main interest is learning Tantra but just not with each other...I love my hubby because he is different to me and this is very grounding and humbling and he gets the benefits of the Tantra talks if you have a truly tantric relationship the bond is amazing so it really dose not matter that I happen to talk about initment topics with another man...if anything its because I have that back up and support of information shearing that is indeed keeping my interest on my true mate.(hubby) so lets stop being so conventional and up tight about gender because a we all can learn to have some self control and a true friend will want to help support you in what's going on in your life and shear openly.
In some cases it's true. As a woman, I only have 3 male friends. A guy I've thought was my good friend got drunk a few weeks ago and started confessing feelings. I was really caught off guard. Like whoah, dude. Line crossed. I realized this has happened my entire life, dudes are always making passes. Gay or old men are my friends as a 27 year old. Lol.
Lol so many women in the comments seriously believe that they have 100% platonic male friends. Hate to break it to you, but no. He has definitely thought of you or considered you in that way at least once, and he may have fantasized about it much more often than that. Nice try suppressing your widow egos and acting all shocked. You've successfully friend zoned him. Congratulations. Like that's a major feat.
Wow. This was pathetic. 1. Why is the tall black guy, being so obnoxious with his manner, and why is the white guy being so intentionally stupid with everything he's saying? I realize they're jokes, maybe it was his delivery, but they're just really weak and stupid-esque. 2. If you're in a relationship, a serious relationship. There is no need for you to have a "best-friend" other than your significant other. You can have close friends. You can meet up for dinner,or a movie or anything casual here and there. But no, your best-friend and top priority should be your significant other. 3. Your "child-hood" best friend is just that. A friend from your childhood. You're not a kid anymore. 4. A woman isn't insecure because she's assuming what is physiologically obvious.
Lol aww hun. I didn't mean that, but the vast majority of you are in these situations. Most would either be at a stand still, or angry and yelling and wouldn't try to understand. 1 out of four of them understood. And that was a white guy...sadly that says a lot also but what can you do lol. *****
Yes I k that's why he pointed out things the black mitten should have did loland good for you congrats. I call every one that lol my bf is white and a Marine lol. I trust him but then again he's like the guy in the video, he just understands and respects women. I love it. But to end all the confusion. These are 3 examples of good character out of millions of men. Lol. Whose treating their girl right is a lesser number . *****
Lol I dont hate black guys but most black guys don't like me. White and other cultures do but black seem not to.. and tbh I have dated black guys and both thugs and nerds ... I still feel like white guys (this is sad) try to understand me more than black guys. They try to meet my needs and make me feel like a princess. Lol. They put me in check when I need it but they handle me better. That's all.
its trust when you get into a relationship with another person. i am a strait person, i have grown up around boys i went to a school where there weren't that many girls at the start yes i was friends with them lovely girls, still friends with them still, but i had at least 6 guy best mates at school we were so close, i was bullied because i was in a great friendship group and also i had learning difficulties which didn't help me being bullied. I've grown up into my 20s still have the best guy mates 3 have gone distant but 3 have stayed, few years on i met 3 more guys who became my best friend, we all had a pack that we would friend zone each other they have helped me through tough times and loss and i couldn't thank them enough. there is nothing wrong with a man to have a best friend that is a girl. it is the opposite for me. ive had boyfriends that werent nice and grew distant ended on good terms but recently ive had reponses saying its weird from men that i have guy best mates
I'm shocked no one asked what kind of dude (besides gay) has female best friends ?? That's what the homeboys are for. You need someone to go shopping with ? Or ?
I strongly believe you can have best friends with anybody and still be in a relationship. I don't see why it should be a problem especially if you trust each other
amar ayer But not every men in the whole world are sneaky, the same goes to women. We have fallen prey to stereotypes so much that we cannot clearly take a person for who he or she is. I mean if someone does not truly love you it does not take a friend from the opposite sex for him or her to say bye!
So someone like me, a bisexual woman who is attracted equally to men and women, just can't have any best friends at all? Because I might fall in love with any of them, right? Well that's just ridiculous. I have two best friends, aside from my girlfriend, one is a man and one is a woman and I've never had any problems with jealousy in my relationship due to that.
Subjectively This is based on cultural differences. I think there are boundries on this particular topic, however men and women can be equally insecure, if there is cause to be of course! Maybe women have more insecurity instinctively? However, if your have a deep trust through deep understanding, then there should be no problem with deeper external friends, so long as your not telling your best friend what you wouldn't tell your own husband or wife. Also, if your in a loving and caring relationship, then you wouldn't have either the time nor notion to be external. Otherwise it becomes something else.
coming from a guys perspective like the woman in the vid said "women and men are naturally drawn to eachother so the more you open up to each other the more we get attracted" and that's actually very Tru I had a girl as a best friend and she was dating my guy Best friend and I wanted us to stay as friends but more and more as we opened up towards each other she got attracted to my personality and I got attracted to hers and that was probably the biggest mistake I made I honestly believe it's my fault that she ended up cheating on him with me, because I shouldn't have been best friends with a girl in the first place it's hard to keep emotions between you and a girl normal. Love just comes naturally between how big the bond is. With guys the main code is to never let some girl come between y'all bruhh and I broke that with mah nigga😪 it's always gonna be M.O.B from now on if you don't know what that means search it up🙌🏽
Look I totally get about both side. both of them are not wrong. A guy CAN HAVE a girl best friend and the same goes for a girl CAN HAVE a guy best friend. And yes there are a lot of times that your will feel insecure about it BUT (AND I WILL CAPILIZE IT) It just comes down based on trust and communication. If it is the right person who don't have a problem with that kind of you have relationship with your best friend than u have nothing worry about. But if u start saying that u don't like it, than u just ruined ur relationship with that person that might be the one that you want to spend ur life with. SO REALLY LIKE I SAID BEFORE YOU HAVE TO TRUST AND COMUNNICATE WITH YOUR PARTNER. YOU MIGHT EVEN LIKE THAT PERSON JUST TO HANG OUT WITH HIM OR HER BECAUSE HE OR SHE IS REALLY AN AWESOME FRIEND.
Men and women can have male and female friends, even if they look hotter than you or your partner. Your partner is not your best friend, they are your partner. Just like a parent is not their kids best friend. You need a best friend male or female, who you can talk to about anything or clear your conscience to. Your partner and best friend are not the same thing. You either trust each other 100% or you don't. It's that simple.
Tahj and the other guy have the right idea, people dont just have sex with their best friends because they vulnerable it is a matter of self control and respect and if you cant trust the person to do that then leave em
I'm on the guys side. I had a BEST FRIEND. Who was a guy and there was nothing sexual between us at all! we where so close but as soon as he started dating his stupid girlfriend she freaked out and made us stop being best friends. I feel like a good and confident girlfriend, who trusts her boyfriend wouldn't make her man stop being friends with his friends make or female.
Camille Lee I was friends with them both and helped her 24/7 with her problems and all she ever did was start rumors about me because she was jelouse that I was a female and was close to her boyfriend. That is why I called her "stupid" and sorry but if somebody just came into your life, treated you like shit and messed your whole life around and then manipulated your best friend into never talking to you wouldn't you be pretty irritated and mad too? Exactly so please don't like start getting all protective and defensive over someone you don't know in a situation you know nothing about.
I have a guy best friend & we share everything together especially what goes on with his past relationships. I even sort of hooked him up with my girl best friend . So bam haha
If you don't trust your husband to just be friends with a girl, why would you marry him in the first place?
Samantha Derrick 1st of all, I'm a chick. Second of all, I just don't get jealousy all that much. If they're not responding to the flirting then why would I care?
Bj Tibbs if you're stupid enough to trust a man with another woman, well let's just say it's mindset like yours that contributes to divorce rates.
you're supposed to protect your relationship not pretend like you're fine and dandy with some woman grinding up your husband.
Bj Tibbs coming from a guys perspective like the woman in the vid said "women and men are naturally drawn to eachother so the more you open up to each other the more we get attracted" and that's actually very Tru I had a girl as a best friend and she was dating my guy Best friend and I wanted us to stay as friends but more and more as we opened up towards each other she got attracted to my personality and I got attracted to hers and that was probably the biggest mistake I made I honestly believe it's my fault that she ended up cheating on him with me, because I shouldn't have been best friends with a girl in the first place it's hard to keep emotions between you and a girl normal. Love just comes naturally between how big the bond is. With guys the main code is to never let some girl come between y'all bruhh and I broke that with mah nigga😪 it's always gonna be M.O.B from now on if you don't know what that means search it up🙌🏽
Intrinsically Me so what you're saying is that women cannot be trusted?! Noted.
Bj Tibbs PREACH
They literally got in her face. I think she hit a nerve.
It upset me that they did that. They literally used their size to talk down to her and talk over her.
@@emmapowers6221 and women don’t do that against a guy????
@@KingmRomeo not usually no. The men that do that are often taller than the women. As someone who is short I deal with it all the fucking time and it's always men. Shut up.
I have really close friends that are guys and one that I'm very close to. I met his wife a couple years ago and it was SO awkward. I'm still close to him but I respect her discomfort. I don't call or text as much as I used to because it gets confusing. You can have male-female friendships easily, but... your bf/gf should be the person you call your best friend. I admit to getting a little jealous when my bf confides in one of his female friends but I also know that they knew him before I did, and they aren't a threat.
Bnh
but you should always have another friend to back you up. who you gonna trash his house with when he dumps for the bitch down the street?
What?
Personally, I think that if you can't/don't trust your partner having close friends of the opposite sex, you probably shouldn't even be together.
True
I am sure you are a man.
personally, I think that if you have close friends of the opposite sex then you should be together, stop breaking the boyfriend/girlfriend's heart and wasting their precious time that's disrespectful asf .. btw ima guy
I'm a straight male, and most of my close friends are women.
My fiancee is a straight female, and most of her close friends are men.
We trust each other.
We have a very happy relationship.
@@NotSoPhotogenic you probably gay?
DOES NOT WORK, been there, done that, got the t-shirt. My so called male childhood "friends" always ended up liking me later on.
Exactly.
Don't show any interest back and they won't ask you out. At least if he's not retarded
It works, the problem is women and men tend to make it awkward after one of them makes a move. Girl rejects the guy, guy continues on like it didnt happen and still wants to be friends. But the girl cant get over it, then treats him like all the other guys shes rejected and stops being friends with him and vice versa. All you have to do is both say "Okay we are still friends" and move on. I grew up with a bunch of female friends...did I want to date some of them..sure, did I over step boundaries once or twice sure. But we just acted like it didnt happen. I've even had female friends where we'd sleep in the same bed and not touch each other. People just dont know how to talk to each other. It's always a communication error. You can have male friends, you just dont want to. Either way once you're in a relationship it becomes an issue for your partner anyways being close to a friend of the opposite sex if you dont ensure they both become friends too. Some relationships I've been in it was like the woman wanted to keep me away from her male friend. Usually it was because she was telling him private things about the relationship. Trust me, Im very skilled at talking to people and good with relationships.
If you want or have male friends never use them to talk about your relationships with other men because in their mind it gives them the impression that you would possibly date them. Just like your female friends that want to score brownie points with you, they will purposely try to sabotage your relationship with ill advice and worst case scenarios. I know girl code and guy code because Im naturally good with social engineering. In short...most people arent good with being friends with the opposite sex because they don't set clear boundaries and often purposely leave things open for interpretation.
My husband has female BFFs and they eventually became my friends. I trust my husband. I don't have any male BFFs, but he has never had an issue with me talking to my male friends. My husband is also my best friend. It's about trust and love more than anything. If you don't have that you are with the wrong person.
Great story
Do you feel jealous if his female friends are around, Laura? ;)
Yes youre smart and you let her hang out with you and family as a group outing or something. What Tahj was talkin bout was why cant he have a female friend on the side like when hes alone hell naaah
Huh, didn't even remember this post from ages ago. Please read time stamps. 🤣
@@LauraNanoVargas lol
I've had many male friends develop feelings for me :/
+Aisha Perez Same here.
Ding ding ding. I work in a place where there are A LOT of males around me of all ages. While yes there are some good faithful loyal men there, there are also A LOT who aren't. I have encountered SO MANY married men and men with girlfriends who have hit on me. A lot. I think if people realized how often this happened they would be shocked. It is not always the sleezy players who are doing this. I have even had the "good guy" who had stable long lasting relationships, confide in me that he was attracted to me and make jokes about how he wants me to "be his baby mama". All while he is living with his girlfriend and posting on facebook about how much he loves her. Again, not saying ALL guys are like this but the amount that are, is staggering. Women are just as bad too
Samee I feel like if your male friends create bonds with you they end up liking you so much for your personality or at least I think it's personality because I ain't pretty.
Candle Kane
Women aren't just as bad. Women cheat less statistically
You're probably really good looking. That's why.
That black guy was doing the most. I bet all his bestfriends are females lol
Sa Ku ***Blk dude a playa!
MAN WITH THE HAT IS ON POINT, PREACH IT. No one has the right to act like they own someone, especially if driven by insecurity. People don't own or posses each other.
I had that insecurity because of past relationships. Rather than shaming me for being uncomfortable with him talking to other girls, he helped me through it by listening and adjusting how he behaved around women. It allowed my insecurities to listen. Good relationships help each other grow.
I agree with the woman that spoke of "herself being her husband best friend"... As a man, If your childhood best friend is a woman/girl, and you are so close that no other woman would break up your relationship, then they should get married to each other... No need to have sex and marry a different woman, with your childhood "girlfriend" (soulmate) in your life... that is a threesome and a waste of her time...
Agreed! Your best friend should be your wife. If it's some1 from childhood, we're all grown ups now & have naturally evolved from that stage. And so, should be some1 you see infrequently out of respect to your wife. We unfortunately now have a culture that place much value on the spirit of the union.
Evilkitty64 does not*
what if you and that best friend never catch feelings for each other though
When a guy and girl are close friends eventually one starts to like the other..this happens in MOST cases so it happens too often for it not to work out as them being close friends. Having a guy or girl acquaintance while in a relationship is fine but not someone you spend a lot of time with or tell your feelings or secrets to..that opens the door for opportunity for the other person liking you if they are already attracted to you.
WEAK AND INSECURE! yesss!!! It's all about TRUST! You can be friends with anyone as long as you and your partner trust each other! Some of my greatest friends are boys and that never bothered my boyfriends. It made it more fun for us to all hang out, actually. Hahaha :):) Point for the men!
Amen to that
I was thinking the exact same thing
to make sure you weren't doing anything XD
I feel the same way...but when guys have female friends???? even when I simply left it alone and trusted who i was with it always came back up as drama. Women can have a man as her friend for various reasons and not have any type of sexual attraction but men are naturally different. It's just like the double standard of men saying women can't have multiple sex partners and still be a lady but men can and its ok . I just feel it works for females to have male friends but men...no. But then again maybe that is just my own experience with different bfs having female friends and having it always come back to bite me in the ass.
I'm sorry to tell you this but as a guy I know for sure from the vast majority of men I have known and myself that we can't be just friends with girls that we find attractive. It's always on the back of a guy's mind if he find a girl attractive. The ones who don't they gotta have strong religious motives and principles of loyalty that are very very rare. Being friends that you might meet once a month or say hi to and talk for five minutes is different from someone you talk to all the time and meet with several times a week alone. Trust me what that guy said at the end that he would agree that his wife should take a close best friend male who's straight is just not honest and wouldn't stay calm when he sees his wife going with him all the time.
These women were blowing things way out of per portion of course men and women can be friends. I'm a girl and I prefer to have boys as best friends,people always say " Well your just being friends with them because you just want a boyfriend." That's no true girls just complain to much..Yea that was true that when women go through hard times there gonna see that man for support and may have an attraction you just need to be man enough and know where to draw the line.
Oh ok I thought it looked wrong Nthabiseng Phelane
That's the problem, people don't know where to draw the line lol Yet when you discuss it, they play stupid. :/
interesting......so your telling me if you went to your male "friends" and told them to date you or sleep with you they would say no? A STRAIGHT MAN CANNOT BE JUST "FRIENDS" WITH A ATTRACTIVE WOMEN!
" use his credit card " LMFAO Tahj nailed it !
Never again will I date a guy who has a female "best friend" my boyfriend ended up sleeping with his "best friend" only when I became his girlfriend is when she wanted to start hooking up with him. She was jealous. Never again.
This is what I hate. People always just think that, even during childhood, "If a guy and a girl are friends, they WILL get into a relationship". And because of this thought process the two friends feel like it's necessary to get into a relationship.
What happens next? The whole thing is ruined. This is also why the people want to become best friends with the exes. Because that's how it was and how it was supposed to be. They already know from past experience that trying a relationship again ISN'T GOING TO WORK. So people need to stop worrying if their partner is cheating. Why would you be in a relationship with someone if you fear there is even a chance of cheating?!
Guys can have female bestfriends
Especially from childhood, i understand that somepeople starts relationships later in life but...
It take disipline and practice
I have a best friend that's a male? We're like fam!!!
He have a girlfriend and she's totally fine with it. They also have two kids. and they know me as the best friend of their father!
It's just old mindsets that men and women can't have a healthy relationship without sex or romance involved, unless family ties. I personally think that's foolish and impractical. I have both a male and female best friends and would walk on fire for both of them. And she could help me move a couch. Idk if the white guy made a fail attempt at that joke reasons why he would have a women as a friend, basically saying you all as weak, emotional and unstable entities.
@@devinngeorge Some people (men and women) have had experiences that make it hard for them to mentally rationalize it as just friends. I had that insecurity for a while and it ruined a relationship, but my current boyfriend took the time to understand the background behind it. He changed how he interacted with the girls in his life and helped me grow. Now I'm not insecure about that at all. True caring partners help each other grow not disregard it and shame those feelings
THIS IS SO IRONIC BECAUSE TAHJ PLAYED TEDDY ON FULL HOUSE AND HE WAS MICHELE'S BEST FRIEND AND THEY EVEN HAD AN EPISODE WHERE TEDDY TALKED ABOUT THIS LOL
Mel ty
He's just immature
You can totally have a guy or girl bff as long as lines have never been crossed. I have a guy bff who I've been friends with (off and on) for about six years, we are both in relationships and there's no problem. There has never been flirting or anything physical. The only time things become a problem is when it becomes physical or someone gets emotionally involved. And guys can totally have girl bffs as long as no lines have been crossed. If you have a girl friend who you've slept with or made out with, I'm not comfortable with that. Not because I'm insecure. Because there is a PAST, a HISTORY. Doesn't mean it won't happen again.
Chelsea ~ You rock ! Very well said. RUclips needs to put your comment at the head of the line.
So from what you said it came physical and emotional at some point? We are talking of best friends not just normal guys you know as friends. I don't believe it works. If they don't show it, they feel it. I felt it but I always had the decency to not show it and keep it to myself and it wasn't easy but I managed but this wasn't because I didn't have feelings. It's because I had principles that people around me found it hard to adhere to.
Not true. If they had been intimate once say, then maybe it wasn't great or didn't mean anything. If the best friends haven't had sex before there is just as valid an argument that one of them is truly in love with the other.
Those man are so rude. They just won't let people talk.
That's because they're getting their point across first before they talk and you know what I think many videos where Bethany has interrupted the guy so you know what equality
Am I the only one that literally laughed this whole video?
Damn, after watching this video.. who's happy to be single too??
The only time it's a problem is when a guy and girl have a physical and emotional past together or they're both on the rebound
I am a girl and have a boy best friend he doesn't have feelings for me and I don't have feelings for him. I think you need to trust your partner if they cheat you know their jerks.
Madison J same. My best friend is a guy and I feel sick to my stomach thinking about him any other way.
omg that womans pissing me off, clearly she doesn't have any trust. just answer Tahj's question straightup!!!
i am a man and i do not think its possible to have a friend that is a girl.
unless they are a childhood friend, it just doesnt work.
I am a woman and I totally agree with you.
Kevin how about this. Why are girls allowed to have friends who are guys?
What's wrong with straight guys having female best friends anyway?
Speak for yourself. I'm a man too and the majority of my friends are women. I didn't do it on purpose, it's just how it panned out. And there's nothing sexual about our relationship.
Why wouldn’t it work? What could really go wrong in this?
Well I can answer this, Im a mixed race male my best friend is a white female been friends for 25 years since age 5. I don't even refer to her as my friend I refer to her as my sister and so do my sibling's, our relationship was never sexual as she is my sister, as for my wife when we first started dating she's never had a problem with me having a female bestfriend because not only was my sister in my life before her but because it was her who introduced us in the first place which is one of the perks of having a wingwomen, also at my wedding I didnt have the traditional bestman instead and ofcourse I had my sister my bestmate even my wife doesnt care if I call her my bestfriend unlike the insecure lady in this video, sorry for the long story but just wanted to say its possible for a guy to have a genuine friendship with a female as in my case that female best friend played a huge role in my wife and I falling for one another which I will be forever grateful. cheers, thanks for listening =)
I agree with you that guys and girls can be friends, it depends on the people, it's not for everybody. Sometimes I get along better with guys more than girls depending on the situation. Thanks for sharing your story.
Oh thanks for reading my post, I asked my wife for her input on this subject and she told me that it's easier for her to except my friendship which started from childhood but her advice to women was to be-friend the female best friend that way you can keep tabs on your guy, I can confirm it gets annoying.
I am married and I have a guy best friend that I've had since I was 15. we don't talk everyday but I love him like my brother and he is always honest with me and sometimes gives me in site when I'm having trouble with my husband. not to mention I just get along with guys better. Now, the rule in our house used to be that he could have chick friends if they were his friend before I was in the picture, but now that we've been married for 6 years that's kinda ridiculous. Now he can have chick friends if he tells me up front ALL about them and I get to meet them and we hang out. I work with guys I make guy friends easy, my husband works off, so before I had my baby I would go out to eat with my guy friends just to not come home and eat alone. I paid for my meal and we work 10 hour days so I ate breakfast and lunch with them why not dinner? my husband trusts me and in the end that's what counts.
I like how the men had a hard time trying to plead their case lol.
From my experiences men and women cant be friends because eventually one of them (or both of them) will fall in love with the other and if the other wont feel the same, the relationship (friendship) will be over.
Man with the hat: "You're already coming from a place of insecurity, YOU"RE ALREADY COMING FROM A PLACE OF INSECURITY"
Tahj: "Not you!"
Man with the hat: "Yes her, HER!"
"the guy in the middle is right"💯
I agree with the last girl. A woman confides in a man and wants to get involved physically to fulfill her emotional needs. What if she starts getting attracted to him past platonic feelings? I dont know if I could handle knowing a guy cheated on me. Someone would wind up getting hurt and it won't be me.
All I have to say is. MAYBE. If you're just in a casual, loose, fun relationship than sure. But if we're getting married there shouldn't be anything you tell ANYBODY else before me as your fiancee, wife, or committed relationship. This goes with male and females.
My best friend is a guy, his girlfriend has been my bestie since we were seven and I love being the third wheel, no jealousy boo 😂
You and the 9 people who liked your comment are weird. Get your own man
Nope I dont trust those friendships too danderous!
I don't know you kinda have to make sure that the wife and the female best friend are on good terms with one another.
I have loads of guy friends. And they're just as good friends to me as my girl friends. My guy friends call me and ask me out to watch sports and have a drink, we talk about girls, guys, life, movies, music, school, work, politics... anything I'd talk to my girl friends too. And no, I've never slept nor am I going to sleep with my guy friends.
it aint about ur husband cheating, it's about what that female best friend will do. no matter how much u trust ur husband, u can't control that female best friend from liking him, can you?
I don't think it has anything to do with female insecurity. My male friends ended up falling for me at different times of their lives, and they were in commited relationships... Even with putting boundaries, humans will get attached to the comfort someone may provide, when your significant other isn't.. That was my experience.
lol, fact: women JUST don't want their GUY to have a female BF. No ifs, no buts XD. And yes, I am a male with a female BF, but we both respect our relationships. And should it not be the case, we put each other in our place. I sure did. The last lady from the audience gave a much more realistic point about opposites attracting. It's true. However, I believe and have always lived by this, that when really committed to the partner, you WILL respect your relationship and draw the line between you and your BF of the opposite sex.
It's hard at times to trust the friendship between your partner and his/her bf of the opposite sex. Not really because you have doubts about your partners fidelity but rather more about the best friend's intentions. That's where trust is put to the test; trust in the partner's promise of fidelity to you.
When it comes to marriage, that's when things change and I agree with the other lady that came with a spouse's point. Your spouse is supposed to be your best friend in this case, because you share everything with your spouse on every level. You are supposed to give yourself a 100% to your spouse and vice versa. That won't work with a female/male wingman on the side, lol.
Actually it's possible to have a girl bestfriend!
It all comes to the amount of respect you have for that girl. If you respect the girl really much and the relationship she is in, then she can really be your bestfriend 😐 Yes men works differently when it comes to women, but it all amounts to self control 👌.
Guys can have multiple female friends even married. Doesn't mean they're sleeping around.
People have insecurities that's why they don't want their husband/wife to have female best friends.
Sad
Taj you can have a female bestfriend, most gay guys do
😂😂😂
+Rossellini C But he cant say that in public. He has to keep it in secret
tahj.
thejeenbeen He looks Asian
💯💯💯😂😂😂😂😂 it's crazy that he has no clue he totally exudes gay...
I’m a girl. Had a best friend for years. Then it turned out he liked me the whole time, “I” just didn’t realize that, but he knew. So girls if your curious pls ask your best friend if he likes you/ever had and if you like someone of course you’d like to know them better like in more than friends!
This turned to a complete train wreck.
Anyone that has a problem with their partner (male or female) having a best friend of the opposite sex is insecure! Either your partner is over flirtatious or has done something to make you lose trust in them. Either way, maybe you shouldn't be with that person. One of my oldest, best friends is a woman and I would NEVER stop being friends with her because of her gender.
I agree
KING090589 So cuddle up to her and get all your needs met by HER!
A married man or woman should be free to have opposite sex friends, but their best friend should be their spouse. During times of emotional need for the friend If the need for the friend, the married couple should be there for that person as a couple, not just as two separate people. They should go to that friend's home together, or they should arrange for the friend to come over when both can be there. One should not let their spouse choose their friends for them, but the "rules of engagement" should be observed. Telling your spouse where you're going, with who etc. If that trust is missing and you can't go out with people from your ring of friends then there is likely a problem in the marriage.
No way would I date a guy with a female best friend. nopenopenope
Same goes for me as a guy. But I would stay single for the rest of my life.
Naturally men and women attract. A best friend is someone who you'll see on a regular basis and talk to on a regular basis. As humans that go through things, sometimes emotional mistakes happen, which is why your woman is supposed to be your best friend, especially when she becomes your wife. I'm not about to chilling all day, while my man is under some woman alone calling him best friend, holding each other when they cry an sharing secrets. It's weird
she could've articulated it better. I would've explained first the intimacy is not just sex. Intimacy is closeness, affection, and emotional connection. The girlfriend or wife replaces a mans female best friend... because the closeness and emotional connection for the sake of the relationship, should only be shared within the relationship... not on the outside of it with someone else.
The last guy to point at the last woman was right: emotionally cheating. They don't have to be sexual feelings, but that loyalty, affection, and endearment is taken from the significant other with an opposite sex best friend.
once you married, your best friend is your husband or your wife. period.
Not always.
Not marries but when I asked successful married ppl that is what they say. it may have not started that way but eventually it ended that way because it just made sense that the person you build yourr life with should be the person you share your most intimate thoughts and the person that encourages and understand the challenges your face simply because you are in the same literally boat
Nellie K. Adaba that may explain why ppl divorce just because they grow apart. Personally I think it is scary to imagine that I cannot be friend with the person i proclaim to love and I decide to spend my life with. if they cannot be a friend why even marry them? if we cannot connect emotionally and be vulnerable with each other, why should we even consider a lifetime together? if i cannot trust you with my life, how can i show you my nakeness and sleepn wake up with you every night?
Your spouse can be your best friend, but not your only best friend, and you can have best friends outside of marriage. There needs to be trust for intimacy and to confide in the spouse or whoever.
why so unsecure
If you are " MARRIED " and I am, I say Hell to the Naw ! Because we as men are attracted to females in a completely different way. We first are attracted to you sexually then over time the emotions may happen.
Women start from the emotional side then are drawn or attracted to the male after he has met or emotional side . For instance men will cheat for sex the female will cheat when her emotional needs aren't met. Especially a brother ! I don't trust no man around my wife, because I know what men do! I don't have female friends......
Thank you. cant be said any better
While dating I believe that having a best friend of the opposite sex is perfectly fine, but upon marriage, the spouse should be your best friend. The friends that are of the opposite sex then turn into a friend and that friendship can remain provided it doesn't cross boundaries. Insecurities really do cause problems in marriage. It also is difficult to be married and to have your role with your spouse be replaced by a friend of the opposite sex. That should never happen. If it does then there needs to be counseling or a very candid conversation.
Guys win it for me, i don't know why things cannot be just platonic? I mean listening to all these people, it's either they 1) watch too much tv or 2) speak from experience or heard about it before . Thats why they dont believe that guys and girls cannot be best friends, but it has happened before and i am best friends with a girl, who i treat as my older sister that i will never have
OK so when y'all have problems in your relationship, you talk to her about our problems
preach
Same way with women and their male best friends
My best friend of over 20 years is a guy.This has caused problems for both of us in previous relationships because of our ex partners insecurities. The constant suspicion and lack of trust caused the end of quite a few relationships for both of us. We are lucky enough that we have both found amazing people that have no problem with us being best friends. I'm married with a child and G is engaged with children. My husband has more female friends than male and I have no problem with it as I trust him. I think it is very simple if you trust your spouse why would you worry and if you don't trust your spouse why are you married!!
This is such a contested subject. I guess it comes down to the individual. Boundaries play a huge part. For some, it open all the way, and for most, they ain’t down with it. It’s not all about insecurity. It’s also about giving up quality time and energy to spend with another dude/chica. For me, and many others., keep your bestie, I’ll/we’ll get another. There’s only several billion people to choose from.
My wife has guy friends. She doesn't hangout with them but when we have gone to places and they were there I knew it was all good. I think one liked men and the other was legit acting like a friend as well. She knows I have life long friends who are girls and she likes them. All is good. Some people can't tho
yes men can have female friends and just be friends or casual with
i'm not ,i'm just saying women can have male friends ,and men can have female friends ,i know couples who have good marriages and and hang out with opposite genders .do you remember billy crystal in when harry met sally .he had great theory that men and women can be friends and not allow any b.s. drama get in the way
I agree with the white guy. He is coming from real life point of views. Today's world there can not be male and female best friends.
T T Today's world? Lol. There was never any reason for men and women to be friends. The only reason men stick around women is because they wanna bang them. Plain and simple.
jeez that's sad. isn't there anything about any woman that makes you want to be around them just in a normal way?
Idk what anyone said the whole time they were all shouting to get a word out
I'm just stuck on how rude these guys are being. They're barely letting Tanya speak.
I'm male and my best friend is a girl. Neither of us have girlfriend/boyfriends though, but I genuinely 'only' want to be friends.
I definitely see both sides of the topic. Yes, men can have female best friends; however, like the last women pointed out, if one is more emotional than the other, then it could lead to something more.
I feel that you can't have a female or male best friend. It's true about emotional attachment. I think if your single and mingling. But not when you are in a relationship or married.
I think there was a lot of confusion there. Yes your lover tends to become your BEST friend but if you have a bunch of friends and, as a man, your closest friend is a female, I don't think your woman should have a problem with that as long as there is trust. I would have no issue with my guy having a female best friend. I also think guys should realize their girls may also have that same thing with another guy. It's like expecting your boyfriend, as a gay man, to drop all his gay friends or your girlfriend as a gay woman to drop all her female friends...
Men and women can't be best buddies that is impossible....You know why deep inside they already fall in love, sometimes can't see it, or feel it.
I personality wouldn't won't my man being friends with other women lol I'm a jealous bitch. But if it was a childhood best friend I probably wouldn't mind because I think it should be boundaries there!
How strong is your relationship?
I'd trust my significant other to be anywhere, with anyone, for any amount of time.
If I were with someone I knew or trusted less I'd feel differently.
If your a single guy and you have a female best friend, eventually you or the girl might want MORE :)
im a happily married woman and I have a male best friend he is my best friend because we have lots of similar interests and make great sounding boards for information with different points of view on the same topics we both happen to care about and our main interest is learning Tantra but just not with each other...I love my hubby because he is different to me and this is very grounding and humbling and he gets the benefits of the Tantra talks if you have a truly tantric relationship the bond is amazing so it really dose not matter that I happen to talk about initment topics with another man...if anything its because I have that back up and support of information shearing that is indeed keeping my interest on my true mate.(hubby) so lets stop being so conventional and up tight about gender because a we all can learn to have some self control and a true friend will want to help support you in what's going on in your life and shear openly.
In some cases it's true. As a woman, I only have 3 male friends. A guy I've thought was my good friend got drunk a few weeks ago and started confessing feelings. I was really caught off guard. Like whoah, dude. Line crossed. I realized this has happened my entire life, dudes are always making passes. Gay or old men are my friends as a 27 year old. Lol.
2:30 The girl on the right in the orange blazer face is hilarious lol
Lol so many women in the comments seriously believe that they have 100% platonic male friends. Hate to break it to you, but no. He has definitely thought of you or considered you in that way at least once, and he may have fantasized about it much more often than that. Nice try suppressing your widow egos and acting all shocked. You've successfully friend zoned him. Congratulations. Like that's a major feat.
+Ian Borton You're confused. I'm not your boyfriend. Stop telling me what to do, and stop shaming me for my pretentiousness.
mfriedrich2012 you have it right. I’ve even read psychology studies that say the same thing you are saying.
Wow. This was pathetic.
1. Why is the tall black guy, being so obnoxious with his manner, and why is the white guy being so intentionally stupid with everything he's saying? I realize they're jokes, maybe it was his delivery, but they're just really weak and stupid-esque.
2. If you're in a relationship, a serious relationship. There is no need for you to have a "best-friend" other than your significant other. You can have close friends. You can meet up for dinner,or a movie or anything casual here and there. But no, your best-friend and top priority should be your significant other.
3. Your "child-hood" best friend is just that. A friend from your childhood. You're not a kid anymore.
4. A woman isn't insecure because she's assuming what is physiologically obvious.
Omg you're a boy and you get this ^-^
Preach ☝️
Lol aww hun. I didn't mean that, but the vast majority of you are in these situations. Most would either be at a stand still, or angry and yelling and wouldn't try to understand. 1 out of four of them understood. And that was a white guy...sadly that says a lot also but what can you do lol. *****
Yes I k that's why he pointed out things the black mitten should have did loland good for you congrats. I call every one that lol my bf is white and a Marine lol. I trust him but then again he's like the guy in the video, he just understands and respects women. I love it. But to end all the confusion. These are 3 examples of good character out of millions of men. Lol. Whose treating their girl right is a lesser number . *****
Lol I dont hate black guys but most black guys don't like me. White and other cultures do but black seem not to.. and tbh I have dated black guys and both thugs and nerds ... I still feel like white guys (this is sad) try to understand me more than black guys. They try to meet my needs and make me feel like a princess. Lol. They put me in check when I need it but they handle me better. That's all.
its trust when you get into a relationship with another person. i am a strait person, i have grown up around boys i went to a school where there weren't that many girls at the start yes i was friends with them lovely girls, still friends with them still, but i had at least 6 guy best mates at school we were so close, i was bullied because i was in a great friendship group and also i had learning difficulties which didn't help me being bullied. I've grown up into my 20s still have the best guy mates 3 have gone distant but 3 have stayed, few years on i met 3 more guys who became my best friend, we all had a pack that we would friend zone each other they have helped me through tough times and loss and i couldn't thank them enough. there is nothing wrong with a man to have a best friend that is a girl. it is the opposite for me. ive had boyfriends that werent nice and grew distant ended on good terms but recently ive had reponses saying its weird from men that i have guy best mates
I'm shocked no one asked what kind of dude (besides gay) has female best friends ?? That's what the homeboys are for. You need someone to go shopping with ? Or ?
Trust is the key in a relationship that's it #ImFinish
I can't have a man that has a female best friend
Any man or woman should-allow their husband or wife to have the opposite sex best friend because who knows him or her better than anyone else
I strongly believe you can have best friends with anybody and still be in a relationship. I don't see why it should be a problem especially if you trust each other
people Sneaky man
amar ayer
But not every men in the whole world are sneaky, the same goes to women. We have fallen prey to stereotypes so much that we cannot clearly take a person for who he or she is. I mean if someone does not truly love you it does not take a friend from the opposite sex for him or her to say bye!
raph muk true bro you got a point every girl i been with did me dirty so its really hard me to trust women especially when they have guy friends
amar ayer I know man sometimes ppl are not lucky in love bro but not every girl will do you wrong..... you just fell on ppl that are not trustworthy.
raph muk what you think i should do in my next relationship ?
So someone like me, a bisexual woman who is attracted equally to men and women, just can't have any best friends at all? Because I might fall in love with any of them, right? Well that's just ridiculous. I have two best friends, aside from my girlfriend, one is a man and one is a woman and I've never had any problems with jealousy in my relationship due to that.
lol tahj was so excited! ha!
WOOOOWWWWW...... LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!! "Use his credit card" omf LMFAO hahahahaa
I wouldn't care if my man has best friends that are women
I have a ton of really good friends that are guys not all from childhood and I won't stop being friends with them for anyone
If something happened they will be getting outrage.
1:58 Her friends jumps out of her seat and says , wait I got to have my friends back then, 3 seconds later, hella sits back down 💺 😂
this is why i am single and have animal friends LMAO!!!!!
Subjectively This is based on cultural differences. I think there are boundries on this particular topic, however men and women can be equally insecure, if there is cause to be of course! Maybe women have more insecurity instinctively? However, if your have a deep trust through deep understanding, then there should be no problem with deeper external friends, so long as your not telling your best friend what you wouldn't tell your own husband or wife. Also, if your in a loving and caring relationship, then you wouldn't have either the time nor notion to be external. Otherwise it becomes something else.
coming from a guys perspective like the woman in the vid said "women and men are naturally drawn to eachother so the more you open up to each other the more we get attracted" and that's actually very Tru I had a girl as a best friend and she was dating my guy Best friend and I wanted us to stay as friends but more and more as we opened up towards each other she got attracted to my personality and I got attracted to hers and that was probably the biggest mistake I made I honestly believe it's my fault that she ended up cheating on him with me, because I shouldn't have been best friends with a girl in the first place it's hard to keep emotions between you and a girl normal. Love just comes naturally between how big the bond is. With guys the main code is to never let some girl come between y'all bruhh and I broke that with mah nigga😪 it's always gonna be M.O.B from now on if you don't know what that means search it up🙌🏽
I’m supposed to be his best friend not her lmao 😂🌚
Periodt
Look I totally get about both side. both of them are not wrong. A guy CAN HAVE a girl best friend and the same goes for a girl CAN HAVE a guy best friend. And yes there are a lot of times that your will feel insecure about it BUT (AND I WILL CAPILIZE IT) It just comes down based on trust and communication. If it is the right person who don't have a problem with that kind of you have relationship with your best friend than u have nothing worry about. But if u start saying that u don't like it, than u just ruined ur relationship with that person that might be the one that you want to spend ur life with. SO REALLY LIKE I SAID BEFORE YOU HAVE TO TRUST AND COMUNNICATE WITH YOUR PARTNER. YOU MIGHT EVEN LIKE THAT PERSON JUST TO HANG OUT WITH HIM OR HER BECAUSE HE OR SHE IS REALLY AN AWESOME FRIEND.
Men and women can have male and female friends, even if they look hotter than you or your partner.
Your partner is not your best friend, they are your partner. Just like a parent is not their kids best friend. You need a best friend male or female, who you can talk to about anything or clear your conscience to. Your partner and best friend are not the same thing.
You either trust each other 100% or you don't. It's that simple.
Tahj and the other guy have the right idea, people dont just have sex with their best friends because they vulnerable it is a matter of self control and respect and if you cant trust the person to do that then leave em
I'm on the guys side.
I had a BEST FRIEND. Who was a guy and there was nothing sexual between us at all!
we where so close but as soon as he started dating his stupid girlfriend she freaked out and made us stop being best friends. I feel like a good and confident girlfriend, who trusts her boyfriend wouldn't make her man stop being friends with his friends make or female.
Annie Gurl maybe his girlfriend had a REASON to freak out, and you calling her stupid only makes YOU look bad...
Camille Lee
I was friends with them both and helped her 24/7 with her problems and all she ever did was start rumors about me because she was jelouse that I was a female and was close to her boyfriend.
That is why I called her "stupid" and sorry but if somebody just came into your life, treated you like shit and messed your whole life around and then manipulated your best friend into never talking to you wouldn't you be pretty irritated and mad too? Exactly so please don't like start getting all protective and defensive over someone you don't know in a situation you know nothing about.
How da phuck wud his gf know wat y'all REALLY duin 2gether!!??DUH!!! U got a 😺. #DUH!
This video caused me physical pain
I have a guy best friend & we share everything together especially what goes on with his past relationships. I even sort of hooked him up with my girl best friend . So bam haha