That's BONKERS! | Would I Lie To You?

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  • Опубликовано: 2 фев 2025

Комментарии • 191

  • @mrmoran0077
    @mrmoran0077 12 дней назад +75

    "he was driving for a company that had very fast company cars" is such a brilliant line

  • @MedEighty
    @MedEighty 14 дней назад +204

    I saw a thumbnail with Bob Mortimer's face on it and I immediately clicked. His stories are just the best, regardless of whether they're true.

    • @Martinbeef
      @Martinbeef 13 дней назад +7

      @@MedEighty I wish he had more stories. He’s fantastic at delivering them. At one time he would have had his own show with a team of writers. Those were the days.

    • @wmperry2790
      @wmperry2790 12 дней назад +3

      Yup.

    • @DeadeyeDaily
      @DeadeyeDaily 11 дней назад +4

      SAME! Bob's a bonafide fucking genius!!

    • @dbus1635
      @dbus1635 4 дня назад

      Well you'll enjoy their latest upload because its got the exact same BM clip as this video.

    • @Martinbeef
      @Martinbeef 4 дня назад

      @ It’s always the way.

  • @VedabrataBasu
    @VedabrataBasu 14 дней назад +79

    Admit it, most of us are here because Bob Mortimer was on the thumbnail. That man is a genius.

    • @Therealalbot
      @Therealalbot 8 дней назад +1

      If you weren't this time you will be next time. 😊

    • @lyalldawson7080
      @lyalldawson7080 6 дней назад

      I was here for Masie Adam.

  • @PaddyRoon7
    @PaddyRoon7 14 дней назад +187

    Idk how anyone asks the name of a character in Bob's anecdotes without showing visible excitement at hearing the answer

    • @PSiGaming
      @PSiGaming 14 дней назад +31

      "Sniper's dream they called him."

    • @Jess_ica2927
      @Jess_ica2927 13 дней назад +9

      Sergeant Bytheway

    • @TimHall42
      @TimHall42 9 дней назад +1

      @@Jess_ica2927 that is a valid surname in the Middlesbrough area where Bob grew up. A friend of mine went to school there and there was someone of that name in the same class.

    • @DaveBlackburnsMixTape
      @DaveBlackburnsMixTape 8 дней назад +1

      Bytheway really is a surname, originating from the West Midlands.
      Just as there are surnames relating to occupations, Bytheway was someone who lived adjacent to a road.

  • @trunkster07
    @trunkster07 14 дней назад +70

    Bob? Egg story? I'm in!

  • @jamesmcnulty3697
    @jamesmcnulty3697 14 дней назад +39

    That one guy cheering at the end of Chris' story makes me think he's tried convincing his mates the same thing but never gets believed 😭

  • @canadaclaret
    @canadaclaret 14 дней назад +26

    Bob's reference to the glove compartment in the F1 car really got me. And I had heard the story before.

  • @Galerak1
    @Galerak1 14 дней назад +35

    I love how wound up David gets about Bob's stories 🤣🤣

    • @quokka0.0nraven
      @quokka0.0nraven 3 дня назад +2

      It's my favorite thing to watch I swear😂😂

  • @phillipedwardness9591
    @phillipedwardness9591 15 дней назад +71

    I love this show, so much.

    • @mitchelljack1590
      @mitchelljack1590 15 дней назад +2

      I love you

    • @crit7514
      @crit7514 14 дней назад +1

      @@billywildefield7210 Don't you speak to my love that way

    • @betperrins7528
      @betperrins7528 14 дней назад +5

      Me too. No matter how many times I view an episode.

  • @NoodleCollie
    @NoodleCollie 6 дней назад +6

    To this day, "it's all been a bit of a lot of talking" still plays in my head whenever I'm tiring of hearing someone else's bullshit

  • @downeyd88
    @downeyd88 14 дней назад +10

    Bob's "pocket meat" is the same as what I call "pocket salami" at work. I always have twiggy sticks or kebana or salami in my pockets to snack on at work and my boss always takes the piss about it, until he gets hungry and says"id even eat your pocket salami about now" which always gets a laugh

    • @corvos3719
      @corvos3719 12 дней назад +1

      I do the same with keeping it in my car. But that's more for some quick protein after working out.

    • @downeyd88
      @downeyd88 12 дней назад +1

      @corvos3719 I'm a steel worker so eat when I can on site if hungry. Pocket foods are the best! Trail mix, salami it's all good

  • @Snookbone
    @Snookbone 11 дней назад +13

    I'm the composer for Eastenders.
    There are two versions of the ending theme and I switch them at random to mess with everyone.

    • @Jambobist
      @Jambobist 8 дней назад +2

      The doof-doofs kicked in when I finished reading your comment.

  • @electricfootballhero1349
    @electricfootballhero1349 14 дней назад +62

    It is in fact 9 doofs (or 4 and a half doof doofs).

    • @martinmills135
      @martinmills135 14 дней назад +11

      I count ten doofs. I suppose it really depends on whether you count the drum beat on the one when the other instruments kick in, though.

    • @Statsy10
      @Statsy10 14 дней назад +9

      I put the video to a quarter speed, and it is definitively 10 beats, though as mentioned above, the other instruments join on the 10th beat.

    • @javidson7534
      @javidson7534 14 дней назад +5

      Purists contend that it isn't a doof if there is other music playing. Four and a half doof-doofs total.

    • @SuzetteGrist
      @SuzetteGrist 13 дней назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🎉🎉🎉🎉

    • @mulatso7959
      @mulatso7959 13 дней назад +4

      Is the plural of doof, doofs or dooves?

  • @bennylloyd-willner9667
    @bennylloyd-willner9667 11 дней назад +9

    I love F1, "Televised traffic" was brill😂
    In my book up there with "tentative testicles"😊

  • @lisab9541
    @lisab9541 13 дней назад +9

    Jo and David intellectualizing and winning the argument.

  • @JoshF710
    @JoshF710 14 дней назад +30

    Rob’s push-ups were surprisingly impressive

  • @calumsanderson6741
    @calumsanderson6741 14 дней назад +12

    "I've watched Eastenders"
    "I don't think you have"
    being able to say that in front of an audience on television to someone who was one Eastenders is just something very few chosen ones get the opportunity for

  • @garysmith208
    @garysmith208 12 дней назад +3

    Love these videos. This is one of the all time great panel shows.

  • @spiv
    @spiv 14 дней назад +16

    i heard "eat the bum" more times than i was expecting today

  • @crw1367
    @crw1367 6 дней назад +4

    Televised traffic is hilarious

  • @D8606-p2
    @D8606-p2 10 дней назад +2

    So glad some people here are discovering this show. So funny.

  • @Jambobist
    @Jambobist 8 дней назад +3

    Rumour has it that Ed Gamble tried to copy Alex's messaging system but got so frustrated he just cut the ball in half and buried it.

  • @raginggamer1984
    @raginggamer1984 14 дней назад +14

    "50 Shirts of Grey"....I almost passed out.

    • @SuzetteGrist
      @SuzetteGrist 13 дней назад +3

      Saw exhibition at Inverness botanical gardens one year, architects competing for 50 sheds of grey. 😂😂😂😂😂😂🎉🎉🎉

    • @SuzetteGrist
      @SuzetteGrist 13 дней назад

      😂😂😂😂brill!!!!!

    • @thedevereauxbunch
      @thedevereauxbunch 8 дней назад

      He's so quick

  • @Guywithnoidentity
    @Guywithnoidentity 14 дней назад +17

    I love Maisie Adam, proper Yorkshire lass

    • @swskitso
      @swskitso 13 дней назад +1

      She made me feel old.
      Just cause the hair cut made me think "oh what have they done with this beautiful girl, I don't understand the fashion"

    • @mimib8032
      @mimib8032 13 дней назад +1

      I love her, she is so funny.

    • @Guywithnoidentity
      @Guywithnoidentity 13 дней назад +1

      @mimib8032 im a bit bias because shes from gods own county like me, that and the fact shes a big supporter of womens football which i love

    • @z0z111
      @z0z111 12 дней назад +2

      ​@swskitso it's called a Chelsea cut and they've been around since the 70s, if she had hair like everyone else she might nothave gained success

    • @Guywithnoidentity
      @Guywithnoidentity 12 дней назад

      ​@@z0z111 its very this is England which she has said a few times

  • @slyasleep
    @slyasleep 6 дней назад +1

    The moment before Mortimer reveals the answer is worthy of a Breughel painting

  • @CraigWeir-q5v
    @CraigWeir-q5v 13 дней назад +2

    21.34 haha !! this reminded me of David / Mark Corrigan in Peep Show having a horrendous time speed dating 😂

  • @LoneKharnivore
    @LoneKharnivore 13 дней назад +13

    16:00 She is correct, depending on where you're standing.

    • @multifunction1000
      @multifunction1000 13 дней назад +3

      Yeah she was right.

    • @DraftingandCrafting
      @DraftingandCrafting 13 дней назад +3

      The house tends to be the reference point rather than the shed. Rob is being unnecessarily patronising again, like when he called Brian Cox an idiot.

  • @magicnsparkle29
    @magicnsparkle29 14 дней назад +10

    "televised traffic" = accurate description of F1

  • @DaThingOnTheDoorstep
    @DaThingOnTheDoorstep 14 дней назад +28

    With Bob, just guess any story he tells is true.

    • @NonsensicalSpudz
      @NonsensicalSpudz 14 дней назад +3

      gary cheeseman

    • @GenCavox
      @GenCavox 14 дней назад +11

      He actually has a small tell that's relatively accurate. Not 100% foolproof, but you have to ask yourself "Who's the idiot in this situation?" If it's Bob, it's true.

    • @lesterbottomley7641
      @lesterbottomley7641 13 дней назад +1

      Just go the opposite to David and you'll be right, guaranteed.

  • @linshanhsiang
    @linshanhsiang 14 дней назад +3

    Bob's story reminds me of the nightmare race in Evelyn Waugh's "Vile Bodies."

  • @DanGolag
    @DanGolag 13 дней назад +6

    That bloke started playing his guitar, so Maisie decided she had to dip.

  • @shirleymarchand5800
    @shirleymarchand5800 9 дней назад +1

    No pocket meat 😂😂😂😂

  • @sivansharma5027
    @sivansharma5027 14 дней назад +3

    "i think the shows going fine!"

  • @devinmilligan8321
    @devinmilligan8321 5 дней назад +1

    I don't wish I was other people often but if I could live Bob Mortimer's life, I would without hesitation.

  • @susantaylor5106
    @susantaylor5106 14 дней назад +7

    Rob is AMAZING! 😮

  • @kimhewer1479
    @kimhewer1479 14 дней назад +5

    Love this ❤
    Maisie is great

  • @canadaclaret
    @canadaclaret 14 дней назад +4

    Chris is right about bananas. And I didn't know that apples have a bum.

    • @corvos3719
      @corvos3719 12 дней назад +2

      He's also right about the healthiness of the core. But I agree with Lee that it's better to eat straight through, so you get to end with pure apple. Also, of course, don't eat the seeds, as they contain cyanide.

    • @alexstewart839
      @alexstewart839 12 дней назад +3

      I'm a "peel the banana from the black end" convert too.

  • @donyamcashburn5440
    @donyamcashburn5440 12 дней назад +1

    I'm 61 and have been an American every minute of those years. I've never heard the meat in the pocket thing.😅😅😅😅. I'm a Tennessee Hill Billy, I know carrying meat in the pocket is a good idea. Not for luck, for food. Roaming these hills, you need to be prepared.
    There's no humor like British humor.
    It is true about the apple seeds

    • @samsowden
      @samsowden 12 дней назад +1

      oh, no, Bob is a category of humour all unto himself.

  • @Arcturuseyes
    @Arcturuseyes 9 дней назад

    May God bless Mr. Motivator, the Uk should listen to him

  • @christyannalisacarsondefel1537
    @christyannalisacarsondefel1537 8 дней назад +1

    I wish Bob was on Who's Line Is It Anyway?!

  • @samlawhorn
    @samlawhorn 14 дней назад +5

    There's ten doofs, if you're counting the final one that falls on the first beat of the measure where everything else comes in. There's nine doofs if you're only counting the ones that are without any accompaniment. In David's parlance, that would be five doof-doofs or four and a half doof-doofs. It helps if you count in fives. One, two, three, four, five, 1-2-3-4-5. Compare this to Starship's "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now," which has 11 or 12 doofs (again, depending on whether you count the connecting beat with the accompaniment or only solo doofs), or 5 and half doof-doofs or 6 doof-doofs. I mean, technically, there are more doof-doofs throughout both songs.
    From America, I thank you all for introducing me (a drummer) to the term doof-doof. I shall use it faithfully from here on.

    • @sampizzey4862
      @sampizzey4862 9 дней назад +1

      I don't know if there are more versions of the theme than I'm aware of, but I've never heard one that has a doof on the first beat of the normal bars? It usually has doofs and then switches to a standard kick.
      There are 9 doofs :[

    • @samlawhorn
      @samlawhorn 7 дней назад +1

      ​@@sampizzey4862 Ah, I see what you mean. I think you're right: it sounds like a kick on that first beat. 9 doofs (4.5 doof-doofs) it is!

  • @TimWallace-j9d
    @TimWallace-j9d 6 дней назад

    Well, I got all the answers right. Truth is MOSTLY stranger than fiction imo when it comes to stories, even if there's a bit of embellishment sometimes, not necessarily deliberate. In Bob Mortimer's case, the more implausible the story the more likely it is to be true.

  • @AllanNeaves-qn3zr
    @AllanNeaves-qn3zr 11 дней назад

    Whilst my garden is not quite 60m long. I find a lung busting bellow of " Grubs up works "

    • @mattybhoy6373
      @mattybhoy6373 7 дней назад

      Come in at half 12 works also😂

  • @samsowden
    @samsowden 12 дней назад +1

    there was a dip in front of that window

  • @youtoobfarmer
    @youtoobfarmer 9 дней назад

    As the title tune from Eastenders, I can tell you that there are nine doofs.

  • @gamingbady5305
    @gamingbady5305 14 дней назад

    How have I not heard any of these, they are great

    • @multifunction1000
      @multifunction1000 13 дней назад

      They film a lot more than what we see in the normal 30 mins.

  • @d4rksol123
    @d4rksol123 10 дней назад +2

    Chris’s apple core story really has me confused. I was dead sure it was a lie till he said it wasn’t.. I’m pretty sure I have read that apple seeds contain chemicals very close to cyanide in them and are considered poisonous for humans. How is he managing to avoid all the seeds if he is munching on apples “bum up” core and all?

  • @michaelc.2887
    @michaelc.2887 14 дней назад +13

    Blind man said he read it in the news. I've seen his type on the radio

    • @swskitso
      @swskitso 13 дней назад

      I ain't listening to you

    • @michaelc.2887
      @michaelc.2887 13 дней назад

      @swskitso ahh why man? No tongue?

    • @swskitso
      @swskitso 13 дней назад

      @michaelc.2887 I'm reading
      I listen with my ears buddy

    • @michaelc.2887
      @michaelc.2887 13 дней назад

      @@swskitso 🤦

    • @andywatts8654
      @andywatts8654 12 дней назад

      His phone reads out the news to him or whatever web page he visits

  • @Arcturuseyes
    @Arcturuseyes 9 дней назад

    Only in the UK is there something as Apple News

  • @ronwilliamson-uz7kb
    @ronwilliamson-uz7kb 10 дней назад

    It's kind of cool. I think they just take turns being TV stars in Britain. Everyone is eligible for a turn.

  • @bikelawbloke
    @bikelawbloke 12 дней назад

    Nine doofs - four and a half doof-doofs.
    (Drummer.)

  • @Arcturuseyes
    @Arcturuseyes 9 дней назад +1

    Lee is a pro.

  • @neilanderson5801
    @neilanderson5801 9 дней назад

    Pls,pls,do a Bob Lucy combo ❤❤❤😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @br1sm1th
    @br1sm1th 7 дней назад

    9 doofs, just played the theme in slow motion.

  • @VinhPrag
    @VinhPrag 13 дней назад +1

    13:00 Do Ubers in NZ have meters?

  • @margaretflounders8510
    @margaretflounders8510 10 дней назад

    lot more than 4 days! This was in lockdown Covid 19!

  • @KLYGJ03
    @KLYGJ03 10 дней назад

    There are 9 duffs in the eastenders theme I just played it slowed down

  • @ChunkyJo
    @ChunkyJo 13 дней назад +3

    I kept wondering why I was continually holing myself into British panel shows the past 6 months, then I realized Trump was inaugurated today. Can't wait to get out of here lol

    • @swskitso
      @swskitso 13 дней назад

      @@ChunkyJo at least we agree on something.
      I can't wait for you to leave.

    • @callum9999
      @callum9999 13 дней назад

      ​@@swskitso You can't wait for a complete stranger, who you've never met nor had any interaction with, to emigrate from your country because... they don't like the person you like? (Out of spite, or because you're a fascist who can't tolerate dissent?)
      You do realise that's a perfect illustration of why much of the world despises people like you? (And assuming that gives you a thrill, another perfect illustration!).

  • @mrboombaby
    @mrboombaby 14 дней назад +7

    Doof-Doofs for musicians: it is a 4 beat drum fill. ONE quarter note triplet (equaling two beats) - TWO 8th notes (equaling one beat) - FOUR 16th notes (equaling one beat)

    • @chrishopkins3316
      @chrishopkins3316 14 дней назад

      For an idiot like me, how many doof doofs does that equal?

    • @Fallendown45
      @Fallendown45 13 дней назад

      ​@@chrishopkins3316😂😂

    • @KCNusach
      @KCNusach 13 дней назад

      4.5

    • @mrboombaby
      @mrboombaby 13 дней назад +1

      @@chrishopkins3316 LOL. You're not an idiot. 9

  • @tclmac1
    @tclmac1 10 дней назад +1

    Played it at .25 speed. There were 9 solid duff and the last one can count as a duff. But it could be something else too. 9 or 10 duff.

  • @daves7086
    @daves7086 7 дней назад

    Jaysus who is the blonde at 11:40

    • @daves7086
      @daves7086 7 дней назад

      and the one at 18:50 too

    • @quokka0.0nraven
      @quokka0.0nraven 3 дня назад

      Lol a past contestant from Love Island named Laura... 😂 first one

    • @james-xf1ox
      @james-xf1ox 2 дня назад

      ​@@daves7086Olga something, I can't remember full name, a comedian apparently 😅

  • @chewar7537
    @chewar7537 12 дней назад

    I have zero clue what they are even talking about, but it is funny anyway.

  • @wilks2006
    @wilks2006 4 дня назад

    What’s a doof doof?

  • @greenshifu
    @greenshifu 14 дней назад +2

    13.34, David did a look to his two contestants of smugness but quickly released Chris couldn't see his look.

  • @marklandgraf7667
    @marklandgraf7667 13 дней назад

    How many doofuses (like me) went to RUclips and counted?
    I counted nine. 1 duple, 1 triple, and 1 quad; 2 + 3 + 4 = 9 single doofs.

  • @gogzy606
    @gogzy606 13 дней назад

    It's 10 dufs and everyone knows it.

  • @Comrade_Jason
    @Comrade_Jason 12 дней назад

    There are nine doofs.

  • @BigfootSF68
    @BigfootSF68 9 дней назад

    It is 9. Doof-Doof Doof-Doof-Doof Doof-Doof-Doof-Doof.

  • @MaverickBlue42
    @MaverickBlue42 11 часов назад

    It would be better if you didn't re-clip past clips....despite how much I love Bob Mortimer......also a disclaimer, the core of an apple is full of cyanide, I wouldn't feed them to anything you care about or intend on eating.....

  • @MerlinZener
    @MerlinZener 15 дней назад +6

    who is the German girl?

    • @georgem3270
      @georgem3270 15 дней назад +6

      Sophie Hermann

    • @Niljakas_Paskamaha
      @Niljakas_Paskamaha 15 дней назад +3

      Eva Light-Brown

    • @MerlinZener
      @MerlinZener 14 дней назад +1

      @@georgem3270 thanks! :)

    • @karry299
      @karry299 14 дней назад

      @@Niljakas_Paskamaha Waaaaaitaminit, Eva Brown killed herself with Hitler, they didnt have children.

    • @JustRifff
      @JustRifff 14 дней назад +3

      Its Urkle Grue

  • @usercarefree44
    @usercarefree44 13 дней назад +1

    Doof doof...lmao

  • @gerulfdosinger9869
    @gerulfdosinger9869 14 дней назад +2

    Who is the pretty blonde in the red dress?

  • @throbinho
    @throbinho День назад

    That guy is such a strange colour! Hair and skin, both bizarre

  • @ferios2
    @ferios2 14 дней назад +4

    Doof doof

  • @FacundoCampazzo123
    @FacundoCampazzo123 14 дней назад +2

    Wtf is a doof doof?

  • @broccolee4328
    @broccolee4328 14 дней назад +1

    I share David's and Miles' sentiment in regards to Bob. There are people who actually play the game well, but Bob totally ruins the concept of the show by jazzing up his truth/lie out of proportion.

    • @bennylloyd-willner9667
      @bennylloyd-willner9667 11 дней назад +2

      😂😂😂 ruins the show by making great entertainment. Damn that Bob😂

  • @hashtag_thisguy
    @hashtag_thisguy 14 дней назад +17

    Joe lycett ain't funny

    • @Martinbeef
      @Martinbeef 14 дней назад +27

      Yes he is.

    • @AdrianCarlisle
      @AdrianCarlisle 14 дней назад +3

      Funnier than you spambot

    • @PaddyRoon7
      @PaddyRoon7 14 дней назад +1

      Tried to watch his standup once. Don't know what possessed me. Never again.

    • @Martinbeef
      @Martinbeef 14 дней назад +3

      @ well, each to their own. I can’t stand Gervais or Mack. I don’t think either are funny at all. Just taking the piss out of people has no humour in it.

    • @Martinbeef
      @Martinbeef 14 дней назад

      @ 😆😆

  • @johnmannymoo8626
    @johnmannymoo8626 14 дней назад +7

    That woman isn't funny.

    • @joybox8203
      @joybox8203 14 дней назад +18

      Look, Lee Mack can be a bit much sometimes, but

    • @crit7514
      @crit7514 14 дней назад +3

      That man isn't funny either

    • @johnmannymoo8626
      @johnmannymoo8626 14 дней назад +1

      @crit7514 funnier than the woman.

    • @gsampson97
      @gsampson97 14 дней назад +1

      The love island girl?

    • @johnmannymoo8626
      @johnmannymoo8626 14 дней назад +2

      @gsampson97 the one with the mod haircut.