COMING TO TERMS | Omeleto
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- Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
- A young woman accepts being an alcoholic.
COMING TO TERMS is used with permission from Kait Gallagher. Learn more at kaitgallagher.com.
Ellie seems to be a typical young woman living in Manhattan, working at her office job and socializing in the city's bars and at her friends' parties.
But Ellie has started to blackout after drinking every night, waking up to troubling evidence of poor decisions that she doesn't remember making. And soon she starts to realize that her "few drinks" may mean something else entirely.
Writer-director Kait Gallagher's intimate, compassionate drama tackles the subject of alcoholism, as well as the growing awareness of an addiction -- and grappling with all the shame and difficulty that such a realization can mean.
The writing and craftsmanship take viewers inside Ellie's perspective, meticulous building the blocks of her growing awareness as she experiences them. The subject of addiction and alcoholism can easily be turned into melodrama, but there are no screaming meltdowns or drastic accidents here, and the dramatic register is fairly muted. Instead, Ellie's journey as a character is primarily internal, one that's more about admitting the truth to one's self instead of being blindsided by it through tragedy. This shift feels more honest, relatable and true to life, and the writing is able to capture the quiet, troubling devastation within Ellie as she realizes the scope of her troubles, while still showing her compassion and dignity as a character.
True to the intimate, clear-eyed style of storytelling, there's an unobtrusive yet resonant naturalism to the filmmaking, a style that isn't exactly documentary-like but still has the immediacy and intimacy it implies, along with a softer, darker, almost more somber palette that reflects the shadowy emotional terrain of the storytelling. The filmmaking also does justice to lead actor Kea Trevett's rich, vulnerable performance, which is able to communicate the tricky double act of trying to hide the truth from one's self, even as that truth is coming to the surface.
When Ellie finally faces her problem, it is both intensely freeing and isolating, especially since Ellie lives in a world where alcohol -- and even its over-consumption -- is so socially acceptable, even expected. But by finally accepting where she is at -- and putting that truth into action -- Ellie earns a powerful, resonant character arc and a moving ending to her story, which is actually a beginning.
COMING TO TERMS could have easily been a single-note social drama, but its intimate, psychological focus and its subtle, precise performances give the film a complexity and richness that is compelling, especially about a subject that is still surprisingly taboo. It's not taboo because of its perversity or deviancy, but because drinking alcohol is so common, and often a rite of passage in many cultures. If anyone struggles with drinking in a world that celebrates and admires a certain libertine attitude, it's often with a sense of shame and denial, often suffering in silence and fearing judgment or social ostracism. COMING TO TERMS is about breaking through those layers -- both within self and in society -- and living in one's truth.
Dam! This whole movie made me think about my past. I could never have one drink, as soon as the Alcohol touched my lips i couldn't stop and sometimes my binges lasted days. I used to black out for days at a time, it was terrible. Every morning for years i would wake up and puke. But now I'm just ovet 2 yeard no alcohol its great.
Congrats! I know it’s hard to stop
Great job!!!
Proud of you man alcoholism killed my dad and sister you are saving yourself and famliy a lot of heartbreak congrats
Thank you all! Seeing those comments is fuel to keep going! 🤘
@@Getithowyoulive863 I know i'm a alcoholic cause of my genetics even tho i can count on 2 hands how many times i been drunk cause the few times i drank i wanted more i could lose my pain and alcohol would take it away but it just caused more pain everyday when my dad would drink i wishing i could take away his pain and all he could say was im so glad to have a son like you . You have a chance to beat that awful dieses i share to show you there's someone close to you that loves you that much don't let them down i know you won't God bless and good health bruh
I’m an alcoholic. I just went 30 days with no alcohol. Then I celebrated by getting drunk. Alcoholism is terrible and I feel like the only thing worse it’s my nicotine addiction. I really hope to overcome these battles one day.
one day at a time...i know it sounds cliche, but i really mean it. Its true. Don't stress urself out, just try to get thru it. Find someone thats been thru it before, to help you, like a sponsor-type of mate. It will really help u out. People, places & things - try to change up that old depressing state of being & scenery. If you really want it, you can do it. Good luck xx
You will, just keep the faith
SupaDopeMex step by step! You got this!💓
Nobody likes a quitter-
Smoke weed
Being an alcoholic who’s trying so hard to stop is tough. Let’s cheer and help each other out ❤️
💜
Yes u right sweetie
You can do this! I hope you’re doing better now, just remember that everyones path is different. Yours may not be the same as someone elses and that’s perfectly okay, all that matters is that you keep trying :)
U got it honey I am a alcoholic to
I’m proud of you, you can do this
I love how the breakfast with the girls showed the stigma surrounding rehab. Sounds like they all have a problem with alcohol to some degree, binge drinking or otherwise, but they’re in denial of that problem and so quick to judge someone else for getting help with theirs.
Yes, those are the most difficult to navigate if they're in your social circle.
Had to come back after a year and a half of commenting here during the first 2 months of my sobriety. To this day, this short film still made an impact in my life when I went into sobriety for good. As of tonight while writing this, I am 620 days sober. I will never touch alcohol ever again. Other mind-altering substances? They can f---- right off along with alcohol! Sobriety since July 10, 2021!
Mad respect.
@@BlackSailPass_GuitarCovers Thank you. 886 days sober as of today. 2 1/2 years sober.
Go head sir! Love it!!
@@StrongnBeautiful 3 years since July 10, 2021!!! Still going strong!
@@CCTH-86You are STRENGTH. Huge respect.
Not excusing her behaviour - glad she is taking responsibility - how about the rest of her social circle - constant peer pressure - constant drinking - societal problem not isolated incidents
That's a point they're making here. That you can realise you have a problem and try to quietly stop drinking but then you lose the ability to be social and people brush off you saying you wont drink because 'we've all said that!'
Can't really call it part pressure of you don't tell people know, how would they know. They didn't push it on her she could have said no any time. Defo empathise with her but I don't drink you just have to let people know
You can't expect her friends to know she's trying to stop drinking if she hasn't said anything about it.
They're alcoholics too
and if you say no thanks then they want ot know why not
Can we take a moment to appreciate the person who writes these descriptions of Omletto? I guess many don't read. But everytime before watching the movie I do read the descriptions. It is always soo beautifully written!
True ...
Absolutely! I always read the detailed description after watching the film. It delves into things I may have missed or not entirely understood.
@@CarRonnie4ever yup(•‿•)
i thought i was the only one! no doubt they do a really great work! always helps me a lot when im struggling to understand parts of the movie :)
I didn't know there was a description. thanks for pointing it out.
A very realistic portrayal of how societal norms can mask behaviour that is detrimental to an individual. i loved the subtle way in which her denial, attempts at abstinence and final acceptance of the problem were shown. Great story, great acting, thanks
It also shows the often under acknowledged additional problem of peer pressure.
This one hit a little too close to home! Went through a bad relationship that made me over-consume alcohol. Things are much better now!
I'm glad you're doing better!!
So glad you're doing better! Keep up the good work. You're stronger than you might think.
Stop using other people as a excuse that's how drunks are born.
@@raegruder4626 stop judging people by not being in their shoes :)
@@raegruder4626 that's a useless thing to say especially since she's better now. It just makes you look like an ass.
i wish this would’ve portrayed the panic attacks and horrific anxiety caused by alcohol. and i’m not talking about anxiety over “what you did last night”. i’m talking about the pure panic that is all neurological. the panic that your brain feels like it is killing you with fear. just fear of fear itself. that is caused because alcohol screws up your serotonin, gaba etc. it’s what stopped me from drinking. nothing like laying in the comfort of your own home surrounded by those who love you and feeling the most afraid you’ve ever felt in your life.
Yes..this! How true. It's the most terrifying thing ever. It's what got me to finally quit drinking.
@@mandynicole10 Im sorry youve had to deal with it too
The anxiety symptoms are real. This video was so relatable I drank heavily to cope with a really toxic relationship and the drinking made the panic, anxiety, fear, and depression so much worse.
It could have shown her with the withdrawal shakes, hair falling out, spiking her coffee at work. And yes the panic attacks.
Our old friend delirium tremens, where you don't know if you're awake or asleep as dark shapes around your room crawl across the ceiling from corner to corner and down to the floor, you don't want them to see you but find yourself screaming at them - not a great way to stay hidden. Probably the most scared I have ever been, I would sweat so much that it would feel like I was laying on a water bed with a puncture, sticky, smelly times indeed. I used to think the terror would scare me to death but I became used to the strange figures eventually and would expect them any time I couldn't get any booze. It was when I became fearless of them and just hoped they would get it over with is when I realised alcohol was killing me and that I should get help. So I did.
Nobody ever saw me getting home having peed myself and vomiting just as I got inside. There's a lot, lot more, of course. That was 20 years ago, when I had to find help, which I did, and stopped. If I could do it, almost anyone can, believe me.
Recovering addicts are the strongest people in the world. I wish all those who at least try, all the strength they will need.
I will have 6 months alcohol free in 5 days. I understand every single scene in this short.
Well done. Keep it up. You'll get to where you no longer count the days, months, and years.
So you don’t have 6 months. You have 5 months and 25 days. Maybe zero by the time you read this
This just goes to show how much of an "accepted drug" alcohol really is!
I mean - socially accepted!
You have a BBQ - with a nice cold beer...got a new car? Toast with some prosecco. New years eve? Champagne. Nice baked cheese with some bread? Perfect for that fruity white wine... and so on...
Birthday Party? Beer...
Old friend comes over?
Come on - let's grab some "tall-boys".
The list go on forever.
It is tough to say no and even tougher admitting that you have a problem BOTH with! and without alcohol...
You wouldn't know it is a problem. Until you try to go a whole year without...
It is unbelievable in how many situations people almost expect from you, that you drink with them...
Scary stuff if you think about it really....
Now I just tell friends and family I'm a recovering addict so they don't pressure me to drink. Once you clearly state your boundaries people back off. I don't hang out in clubs or parties any more either. Too triggering.
Or beer at ballpark's restaurants right into wear kids are watching parents drink
I tell people I grew up in an alcoholic home, no one says anything to me after that... Know who you are...
Happy hours were made for this......2 generations before mine, men used to drink to drunkenness and beat up the family. I saw stats a couple of decades ago that stated almost no alcoholic women before prohibition.....after- the #'s went up exponentially.
A year? Try going a week without and you start climbing the walls by day three.
She’s is what you call a functioning alcoholic she manages to just get by at work and or school while having an underlying addiction . Crazy ish!
a comment from a year ago about alcoholism... So naive... the worlds unemployed and in he middle of a pandemic..... dont judge us.
@@MrWolfheart111 what? I have had an addiction I’m more educated about this than you pal. Keep the nonsense to yourself. You aren’t a hero lmfao
Yeah I spent years as a functionic but thrth be told I never a test to know I was an alcoholic, I knew. Just need to dicide alcohol and all it's isms suck and you just don't stand how you feel hungover!
This really hits home for me. Thank you this film! Alcoholism is something not to be taken lightly. It doesn't discriminate.
68 days sober.
How bad are the withdrawals?! I’m so scared
Cecilia Taylor-Hunt. God bless you. Hope ur still off the alcohol. You can succeed at this. I did it without AA and haven’t had a drink in over 20 years. I asked why do I drink and realized I was a childhood trauma survivor. After I researched all of this and dealt with it I no longer had any cravings whatsoever for alcohol. I was suffering from low self worth and had to drink in order to socialize at all. Too long of a story to go into here but I went no contact from my parents and continued onward & upward from there. Life is not perfect but I have no regrets anymore about my behavior the night before.
@@laraoneal7284 Hey there! Thank you so much for writing back. Yes, I'm still sober. 620 days as of tonight. Feels great to feel my natural energy going sky high. Nowadays, I enjoy being naturally happy and in content without a substance (and yes, alcohol is a substance). My 2nd anniversary of my sobriety is coming soon on July 10th. Looking forward to living my entire life in sobriety. I've learned more about myself since getting sober. It was something else. LOL! I will never go back to the way I was back then. Anyways, congrats on over 20 years of sobriety! Onward and Upward!!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰
@Emiii31 detox clinic. Not f-ing kidding. I'm young, super functional, but if wasn't in so.e kind of free of private clinic my body or my Brian would have shut down
@@laraoneal7284 Hey, lara! Just checking in. Still off the alcohol. My 3-year anniversary of my sobriety is coming up soon. As of now, while writing this, I am 1,041 days sober.
This is exactly where I'm at right now and I'm twenty six also so ty for this
Praying for you🙏🙏🙏🙏
@Mike ❤❤❤🙏
I quit when I was 27. Good job.
Prayers for you and i hope you have the courage to seek help 🙏 I'm 5 years sober off of pain pills. Get your life back 🖤
Strongs 💪🏻
Thank you for this video... I was drinking daily and nightly for over a decade, more really!!! I was drinking 2 700ml bottles of bourbon a day, and would have absolute meltdowns if I ran out!!! It's like I always had to have a drink there or I didn't feel right, and although I never actually got help for it, I don't drink anymore, with everything that happened during that course of my life, I had to change. I even forgot wat a hangover felt like cause I just couldn't get drunk anymore.... I wasn't drinking to feel the effects, but cause I NEEDED too!!! I haven't had a drink in a few years now, and I still want it everyday,but I have to remember that once I start I won't stop, and there is no way that my health can go there again. I am still needing to go to the hospital for appts due to my drinking in the past.... it's surprisingly harder to stop than I ever thought it would be!!!!
I never spoke about this before, and it's been dam hard to write about it and have to think about the way that I was/am, but noticing other people sharing, well it helped me to come out of my shell and share a bit. Thanx everyone.
this is why Omletto contacted your neighbours and made this film.
I was going through 35 liters of wine a week on top of whatever else I drank. Withdrawal every time I stopped. I had the start of liver disease at 26, I was told if I didn't stop I would be dead by 40 but I am 41 now. I showed them. I still drink 36-48 drinks a week to this day, at least I cut down. I will never quit.
@420BASSGIRL 420BASSGIRL Weed gives me major panic attacks these days, it didn't used to when I was younger but something changed.
That's amazing, honestly!!
@Splendid that is also an effect of just weed for some ppl
I did one of those "Are you an alcoholic" questionnaires. The question that sticks in my mind even 22 years later is: "Have you been drunk 3 or 4 times in the last month?" My response was "I have been drunk 3 or 4 tims in the last 3 or 4 nights. Seven years later I hit rock bottom, and have been sober for the 15 years since. The checking the phone every morning to see what I got up to and who I telephone terrorised in black out the night before, is the part that keeps me sober. One day at a time...
This was all too relatable. I was that girl until I quit drinking 4 years ago. I embarrassed myself so many times with my friends, family, coworkers. My 20s were horrible
Well, this one hit home. It was heartfelt, well-acted, written, directed, shot, etc.
My ex struggled with alcohol addiction, so did my late uncle and many, many others in my life. I haven't spoken to her in over a year. She was terrible when drunk. This film did justice to people struggling with addiction. It humanized them. Thank you.
And i'm seeing this film right now while being drunk.
OKAY.
Yes
It might be a sign you are ready for some change.
lucky-now all i can think about
I'm an alcoholic with 15 years of sobriety. This video really touches on one of the most challenging aspects of being an alcoholic which is just how prevalent, accepted, and even expected drinking is in our society. I don't like being around people who are drinking anymore so I have pretty much just become a loner to protect myself.
Thats what im doing
@@SandraGarcia-lj3bd Best wishes to you.
@@tiberiusgracchus4222 thanks , i apreciate It.
Finding Muslim friends helped me.
You don't have to be alone anymore
This is a great film and well done. It shows that alcoholism is a very sad and lonely place. I am guessing that people still look at alcoholics in a negative light. That it is embarrassing to be one. There is still a stigma to it. It's not just so easy to give up drinking. Alcoholics are not always so obvious to pick out in the crowd and that they slur their words and act all nuts and stagger all over the place. I had a friend who drank all the time, she would finish up a bottle of wine on her own almost everyday. She would drink whiskey as well and have a bottle of it in her car trunk to have it readily available. She was in denial for a long time and our friendship crumbled bc of her drinking and there were other issues on top of that. I tried to help as much as I could but it gets to a point where I couldn't do anything else. Many years later....we are still not friends. Still not sure where things stand with her drinking.
Great film, Great Acting.
hmm I am getting notifications that comments are being made from Tim and Charlie. However, I go to read their comments fully and cannot find them anywhere on here. What is going on? I wanted to reply to their comments.
i would say good comment, but i cbf reading all that haha
@@iamsparrow_ lol, I didn't think it was that long however thank you so much for the thumbs up (I think you did lol) and your comment nonetheless. Do you want to subscribe too lol. I am slowly building my channel.
Starlette Oscar yea ofc I can subscribe dude , gl with the channel :D
@@iamsparrow_ sweet and thank you, and it is dudette lol. You should see my cat who is toilet trained.
Blackouts. Memories. Memories of blackouts.
Yep, this is about right. This film is very similar to a large portion of my adult life. I've been sober 10 months and 28 days, but i still think about drinking almost every single night.
It shows the strength of your mind. Continue it longer and your family will love you for quitting. Not easy but so worth it
Do you attend meetings?
I wasn’t able to control my drinking in any effective way until I lost most of my social life in my mid 30’s. It takes an immense amount of will power to not drink when all of your friends are drinkers. I probably drank every single day age 19-32 or 33. Most days binge drinking. People can be openly judgmental or hostile to efforts of sobriety. Started randomly taking a month off of drinking here and there in my mid thirties and went from there. Planning on going full sobriety now, haven’t had a drink since September.
This comment gives me hope. I am proud of you, good luck!
How has it gone, Seth?
Why is "I'm not gonna drink tonight" always responded with "Tch, come on!" * pours alcohol * ..?
If they say they won't drink, then ask them why or just ask if they want anything else...
I don't get why it's a bad thing for people not to drink alcohol.
I drink alcohol and all my friends do, too. If one of them suddenly says "I don't drink tonight", I'd be worried, but I wouldn't "force " a drink on them.
You don't know why? Wait until you've boozed for 40 - 50 years, and your liver, and other organs start to not function, and you find yourself in excruciating pain, with a prognosis of terminal cancer, or sclerosis. Youth can never conceive they'll ever get old.
@@rickblessing2447 You answered a question, but it wasn't the one he asked.
If my friend said they wasn't drinking tonight I would respect that and offer coffee or juice
god, the peeing on the couch hit too close to home..
I'm late to the party here but want to say how much I love this and how incredibly relatable it is (right on down to the AA church, St Mark's, that's right down the road from me in Flatbush!).
I actually saw this piece once before: a year ago I stumbled upon it when I first realized - after 15 years of blackouts, rock bottoms, just sheer luck - that I was an alcoholic. Took the same online tests and grimaced as they all pointed out the truth.
Well, I'm watching it again because, yep, I just started over again. This quitting thing is hard. But trying to take it a day at a time. Going to a meeting tomorrow and really hope it sticks this time.
Thanks again for this film!
Thank you for this. It was right on time for me.
❤️
Hey we just started a RUclips channel taking inspiration from these videos please take a moment to help us please just a like on our recent or a view
The hardest part is making a decision to change.
Most people don't realize how ADDICTIVE alcohol is. Media doesn't help things either.
As an alcoholic who's never even tried to quit I can tell you that after that first drink it never stops.... and you never stop losing.
I like seeing how selfish that blonde friend ultimately was. She's so representative of the kinds of "friends" you often have when you're an alcoholic in your 20s, there for the good times and encouraging and enabling your bad behavior and then ignoring or turning on you as soon as you get too messy or inconvenient for them.
Wow. This was actually SO GOOD. I guess I expected it to be sort of overdramatic, but this really honed in on the slow burn of traumatic horror that comes with an alcohol addiction.
This was so well done!
Like other folks in the comments, I am also an alcoholic. I've been in and out of recovery for 30 years. I am grateful to have 4 years now, but this here is really just the beginning. It's an incredibly insidious thing. People don't want to hear it.
Other people used to egg me on to drink. I was hilarious, and vivacious. Till I wasnt. Now 2 years sober.
@Vali Umpill That is great to hear 💕
@@demijour1234 thank you :-)
Starts off this way right? You were so funny, it was just a good time , etc etc
@@luckyman9903 until windows get broken
Vali Umpill You get me.
poor girl just needs some better mates.
Shes surrounded by shallow, apathetic weirdos.
Lol, no, sweetie. Alcoholism is a lot more than just being surrounded by 'shallow, apathetic weirdos.'
Being a drunk around shallow people is a terrible expérience which just makes you feel worse about your self esteem and you drink more it’s a miserable life
A very sensitive depiction of the anguish of addiction and the effort it takes to begin to climb out. I appreciated the efficiency with which the story was told, how the ensemble was just enough to keep the story rooted in time and place and how the director trusted her lead actress to use her rich inner life to make make the journey both clear and compelling.
As a recovering alcoholic I can really relate to this,
Congrats on doing the right thing.
Salaam to you and to all.
Jay Jayjay thank you 😊. I am still sober. Thanks for your encouraging words. Salaam to you and your family as well.
Well done and keep it up.
I love these short character studies.
People become slaves to what they are addicted to, alcohol is a very cruel master.
Wine is so sneaky. One glass leads to another, to another, without your really realizing it. 🥂
That’s the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen -
I wasn't an alcoholic - but i was an extremely heavy drinker for a good portion of my life. I wish I had the memories I lost due to the damage to my brain all those combined years inflicted. I got tired of waking up and wondering who I was going to apologize to for the things I didn't remember doing the night before. I only drank on weekends - I couldn't handle the hangover and try to work - that wasn't gonna happen. Alcoholism is heavy - and made more difficult with it being in your face with beautiful models and people all having fun in the advertisements. I feel bad for people stuck on booze as it is painful - I haven't had a drink in about 7 years I think - not that I tried to quit, I just didn't want to feel that crappy the next day anymore.... my heart goes out to alcoholics and I hope you can come to terms and have a great life.
I started drinking back in 1999, 6 years after the death of my parents and 3 years after the death of my fiancee. I was crushed beyond belief and I worked in a bar. I played piano in the house band for 4 nights a week and figured, why not? I was going through a lot. Why not have a few to take the edge off. A few became a few more, a few more became a lot more and so on and before I knew it I was a full blown drunk. I would drink just to avoid a hangover from the night before, I would drink to stop myself from feeling. Well that worked until 2007 when I put my vehicle in a ditch. That was in 2007. Fortunately, that is all it took (and of course a brain injury from the accident) to get me to stop drinking. I stopped drinking in 2007 and after I pushed the bottle aside and put it behind me, I didn't look back. Alcohol is a beast. I'm so glad I don't drink anymore. My heart goes out to the ones that still battle this horrid disease.
her selfish friend who looked at her like she killed her cat and all she did was piss on her couch after insisting that she drink is the worst.
This is what happens when you are a grown up and social gatherings are nothing else but "drinking and partying". Your friends pushing the glass in your hand and then wondering how you turned into an alcoholic. It's true she is not that much of an alcoholic but what do people expect from a young skinny girl, different people have different thresholds. People think alcohol is going to help them, you only forget about your problems, you are not fixing them. Plus it doesn't even taste good, just burning your insides. Honestly I don't know how people started to care so much about drinking...............
Silver Wolf the movies and t.v. Push it.
Silver Wolf "what do you expect from a young skinny girl"? Why does it make any difference if shes young or skinny?
@@TheWendable Some people are saying she is not really an alcoholic because it doesn't seem like she drinks a lot. I was just saying that with skinnier people especially women, they need less alcohol to get drunk, that's all. So even though it may not seem like a crazy amount what we see in the film and typically real alcoholics drink more than this, even this amount shown has plenty effect on her.
Not sure what you mean by "she is not that much of an alcoholic".......I think the film makes it pretty obvious that she is. She had a blackout at the very start of the film. She went to her blonde friend's house where there was a party and she had shots and passed out on the couch. Her friend got pissed because she ended up drinking a lot of her liquor....this was the scene the next morning when they were both hungover. I don't know how much clearer they could have made it .
I didn't drink until I was in the Army. The taste of beer was nauseating but my buddies were drinkers so I started with Heineken which is sorta like soda pop for adults. As I got used to it and continued hanging out with them I used Rum and Cola, then moved onto more hard liquor and German dark beer. Eventually I could eat a Pizza and drink a couple Liters of beer by myself. Getting drunk made me feel like garbage the next day. Puking hard liquor made me feel like a fool. One day I decided to quit, and was helped by finding friends who were not drinkers, but continued to dream of Beer and Pizza for over a year. Evidently I have an addictive personality, if there is such a thing. I can't buy candy because if I bring it home I eat it, all of it. A giant, three pound, jar of Jelly Bellies can easily be gone is a week.
There is such a thing. It's a thing.
I went out with someone who was exactly like this. Three months. After the first time she physically attacked me I told her the next time I was gone. It was an awful time for me, much worse for her. I thought I could handle her alcoholism but I couldn't. Only one time I went along with her drimking and got picked up by the police and taken home at 2am and the police had to break down my door in order to get into my flat because I had left my keys at hers. I very nearly lost my tenancy over it. I was deeply embarrassed and still am. I went off alcohol for a long time after the relationship finished. I still see her in town sometimes, and she says now she drinks non-alcoholic wine and beer. This video short depicts *exactly* what it's like. Exactly.
a young woman realizes her WHOLE OFFICE needs to also come to terms with being alcoholics.... like DAMN
Oh god my heart went out to her. It’s a disease that doesn’t care. Race, color, beliefs. It does not discriminate.
This really hit home. Such a good short. Reminds me why I'm 6 months sober with no plans of going back 💪
Keep going 🤗 well done
Nothing but best wishes for you
As a 48 year old who have never had a drop of alcohol in my life, I find this fascinating. I'm not judging. After all, I have a sugar addiction I'm trying to stop. Good luck to anyone who has recognised a pattern of behaviour in themselves and are trying to improve one's life. The struggle is real.
sugar addiction :"D. if youre comparing sugar to this you didnt get it
Muna What else have you never tried? and why not? I can see why you’d avoid things that could kill you but a glass of wine wont.
you're not missing much. and the hangover is awful
@@TheWendable Brought up to be teetotal, however, I have never been tempted. Which made me very popular at university, being the designated driver at my halls of residence.
@S Han I agree with what you've stated. When I was diagnosed with late stage cancer, I was advised to cut sugar. Sugar is cancer's friend.
A few people have pointed out how it's not just an individual problem. It's societal. They're right.
Hardly anyone quits alone, and hardly anyone starts drinking solo. There's almost always some kind of support system needed. Even slowing down is an accomplishment. Harm Reduction seems to work for many.
I am 2 years alcohol free 8/25 this movie hit home and I am sharing it with my sponsor. AA saves lives.
Alcohol is the devil in the bottle. It’s a hard habit to get rid of I use it to deal with my anxiety smh I need help
You're 100% right. It's the Devil in a bottle. Keep on fighting "that weakness", look around for help (nothing shameful about seeking out help), keep your chin up, have a strong faith in God and in yourself, exercise, meditate/pray, eat balanced nutritional foods, make friends with nice positive people. You'll succeed, Bro/Sis. Many of us had been there and managed to pass that "unlucky phase" in our lives ;)
Salaam to you and to all.
I too use alcohol to get rid of or ease my anxiety.
I have bad anxiety too
And I drink too much
13:00 i m facing the same more you try to quite your surroundings around invites you to join in plus when the first sip goes in hard to control and then goes on and on but and thinking to quit the next day...
now i have completely isolated my self and fighting my battle to keep my 3 or 4 days sober days
“It happened again “ - Phil
Hangover 2
Monsieur Macabre I know this is a serious film and I’ve had several family members who were not only alcoholics but drug addicts but her waking up like that does seem reminiscent of the hangover lol
All addictions make these happen. I dont drink but years ago i was struggling with emotional eating. Oh god ! 🤦♀️ It was tough.
I wish this was mandatory viewing as part of a junior high school curriculum. I think a lot of heartache could be avoided if people understood the importance of moderating their alcohol consumption before it becomes an issue.
as a 22 y/o female alcoholic this hits home… can’t help but wish i was as “functional” as her tho
I stopped drinking after my second DUI which happened to be on the same day by the same Bike Control Officer. Surrendering my drivers license for three years did nothing to curtail my drinking. Only when i realized something needed changing was i willing to stay stopped. Its been an enlightening thirty two years five months sobriety.
That's the problem with alcohol, it's too easy to use it for social lubrication rather than just relaxing and being naturally sociable.
I retired from the treatment business a few years ago and I have spent many hours and dollars on treatment movies and films. I think this is better than almost any of the movies we used to motivate and educate. Very well done.
Hit very close to home. Went through a really bad relationship while in the United States Marine Corps that resorted to me consuming large amounts of alcohol every day to ease the depression and anxiety. I’m still struggling to this day to heal and overcome the drinking. Wish the best to all of y’all to overcome you’re addiction.
Sometimes getting sober takes a long time. I got sober in my mid forties. I was a bar hopper in NY after work. I would stay up late, and go to work the next day, looking like hell. I went to High Watch in Kent Falls CT., and with tons of AA meetings, I finally stopped drinking. Alcoholism is a serious disease. We can't get sober by ourselves. It takes alot of support.I think, most folks start to wise up in their forties. Thx for this video.
It's just frustrating how accepted alcohol is....a lot of people have a problem and they don't even realize it. They even have wine at nail salons..ridiculous.
I’m an alcoholic who drank for 25 years. Not once did I stop after the equivalent of one bottle of wine. Maybe a bottle of wine and a pint of 100 proof vodka if I started late. The last couple years I drank from the time a woke up until I passed out in the evening. At least a liter a day.
Nearly 6 years since my other half drank himself to death. His alcoholism and subsequent death has had reverberations throughout our family. I loved him deeply but he struggled with what we believe was depression (he denied this). He refused any help. It seemed like he was on a suicide mission.
I constantly wish HIM back but I know I couldn't cope with the devastion of living with his alcoholism again. During the last 2 years of his life, it was like living with Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.
I lost the love of my life because of my addiction to it
People who have never suffered from alcoholism don't understand this film! The point of the film is to show people that so many young people today are actually alcoholics but nobody takes it seriously because EVERYBODY drinks ALL THE TIME. They think it's no big deal because she's "not that bad". But being an alcoholic is about relying on alcohol and needing to drink. it's not about how how much or little you drink. it's about how much that drinking has affected you. it is different for everyone.
This character acknowledged that she had a problem BEFORE it got worse! That's the point! Most people just carry on drinking until it ruins their lives. But it doesn't make you less of an alcoholic just because other people don't really notice.
@Splendid Same! It just encourages people to become alcoholics.
@Splendid honestly
That's how it starts. You party with people and party with people and it escalates. I started smoking in college and I never did it before, but all my roommates smoked and first it was just a puff here and there and it wasn't long before I was buying a pack of Kool cigarettes. I smoked for 19 years and quit 26 years ago. I never thought I could live without cigarettes, but I have and I'm so glad. We are stronger than we think we are. How did I quit? I went to the source. I asked this man at church who had quit for 20 years how he did it. He told me this..."First you have to admit you have a negative habit. Next you have to replace it with something positive, otherwise there is this big void in your life. Then you must be consistent with that positive habit." That's what helped me to quit.
@@sylviacarlson3561 That's exactly how I quit drinking too! People from church had also struggled with different addictions in the past and they all stopped that way.
I didn't think I could live without drinking. But it turns out, you're just empty inside and when you fill that void with positivity (Jesus for me) You don't need the thing you think you needed anymore.
I'm 9 months sober!
People traumatized by struggling addicts understand more than you think. It's a nightmare for family and friends.
I have been sober for four years. Whenever I go out partying, I keep reminding myself that whatever happens I must not be swayed into drinking. It's a terrible fear because all it will take me is One Drink. One Drink and everything will go back to zero. Believe me, Day zero was the hardest-hit I took but four years later It is still worth it.
Thats called subjective recovery i could never do it that way. The struggle gets to real for me. Some people can man keep it up.
Well done! 9 years here. The hardest thing for me, when I was still drinking... was not being able to say 'NO'. I could not do it... As soon as someone offered me a drink I took it... and I always believed it was my choice! I couldn't choose to stay sober... even if I had planned to. Once I realised this about myself I went and got help. I learned that skill and the rest was easy! (Well, as far as not drinking goes!)
Well done....keep it up 👍💙
Amazing work, well done. You will live longer, be healthier and alleviate depression in the long term. It takes a lot of courage and strength to say No. Keep going.
The problem wasn't with the fact that she herself had a drinking problem, but that ALL of her friends had even worse drinking problems than she did, and constantly tried to drag her back into drinking with them. Those are NOT friends. Those are junkies.
She didn't HAVE to drink with them. No one HAS to do anything. If her friends can't deal with it then they aren't friends
No, I don't think they had a worse alcohol problem than she did.
You get what you allow. Stop going to things that only serve as an excuse and cover up to drink. When you tell someone you're not drinking leave the room. Period!
Pretty in tune with me... The difference is, I live and drink alone. I've cut down to like twice a week, but when I start I don't know when to stop. Most of the time I don't get real bad hangovers.
Where its causing problems for me is internally and mentally. I feel like my stomach and esophagus, and maybe pancreas is like thoroughly screwed up at this point. Probably inflamed. Random pains throughout my stomach and chest, among other concerns. I have a hard time focusing sometimes. I fade in and out.
Don't really have time for treatment with a full time job. At one point, I tried something similar to AA that was provided by the mental health clinic I go to, but it didn't do a thing for me. I'm afraid its gonna end up killing me pretty quick if I don't get it under control. I'm only 30, but my alcoholism has been like this and much worse the past decade or more and I am just recently developing these noticable health issues.
I was twice a week too. Monday to Thursday and then Friday to Sunday.
my last drink at 23 now i am 29, sober is good
I’m happy for you that you were able to quit at 29. I’m 39 and though I’ve slowed down over the last few years I still haven’t been able to completely let it go.
@@irisshalurhad7901 i quit at 23, find good people with same mission bro, faster that way
The same shame attached to the misunderstood disease known as alcoholism is still almost as prevalent today, as it has been since who knows when.
For functional alcoholics, it can be heard to figure out the line between just being a heavy drinker & being dependent on alcohol
"Strive to learn, before you die, from what you run, and to, and why."--James Thurber
I just wonder what happens with these people while drinking. I am physically unable to drink alcohol. After one glass of wine, I just fall asleep. That's it. That's no fun.
When I told my friends my liver can't process alcohol, they think I'm bullshitting them. So I take one shot, and now they know not to get me anything alcoholic. Lmao!
What happens
@@salmaabdullahgb hey Salma
@@isaiahcole3807 hiya
Getting into the mind of an addict gives us a whole other perspective (the way she is shaking while thinking about taking that first sip). The fact that we, as a society, accept and normalize alcohol consumption makes finding a solution soo difficult to adress.
If you happen to be on the outside looking in, it's impossible to understand what the character was thinking while she was going through her spiral as her addiction progressed. All things being equal, it's nice to see someone hit a 'soft' bottom as she did, admit it, and then ACCEPT it and take action. And hopefully, that bottom is the one that she needs. Otherwise it will only get worse. DUI, job loss, family, other legal and family problems....you name it. People tend to hit their mental, emotional, and spiritual bottom after they hit their physical bottom. IMHO, that is the time that it is critical to be in a program and talking to other people who have faced the same issues. Hope is found in the rooms, and life does get better one step at a time. Thanks for making the movie.
I've pissed myself while passed out at several friends places. As you wake up early in the morning and realize what happened. Dear lord that is one big silent "f**k!!!" yelled in your mind as you stand there silently trying to figure out what to do and say. It's been very shameful to go through and it's something that is not easily forgotten. Enjoyed this short, very relatable and nice job by Kea Trevett playing the troubled young drinker.
What did you end up doing?
@@politecat4236 I've stopping drinking till I blackout. If I am going to go for the moon and drink super heavy (which is my natural craving) I'll make sure I have a big sized meal during the night. I am getting older too and my body is letting me know that death is lurking if I keep it up. So far lately I've been a lot more responsible with my drinking and haven't had the horrors of pissing myself which is nice.
It is so so so ok to realize you have a problem and just eliminate it from your life because you're tired of trying to control it.
There's an excellent movie called Smashed with a great performance by Mary Elizabeth Winstead.
Definitely felt this one
Here goes the song to this film:
Helmet In The Bush
-Korn:
I keep asking, what's your lie?
It is disturbing
This isn't mine
Why
Days keep passing
A lot of time
I don't feel right
Please God let me sleep tonight
Everyday confronted circumvents giving in
I just wanna know why!
Want to give it up, but I can't escape. [x4]
I keep asking
Well, again, please try
It is haunting
This takes my mind
Days keep passing
Line after line
I don't feel right
Please God don't let me die tonight,
Die tonight, die tonight, die tonight
Everyday confronted circumvents giving in
I just wanna know why!
Want to give it up, but I can't escape. [x4]
Please God, please God
Please God help me
Please God save me
Please God help me from my painful situation
Please God don't let me slip in tonight, please God
Oh, please God don't let me slip in tonight, please God
Oh, please God don't let me slip in tonight, don't let me die
Please God don't let me give in tonight, don't let me die...!
EDIT: This song is about the Meth addiction of the band's frontman Jonathan Davis, about his determination of giving up his obsession which he kept failing to uphold. I think this merges straight with the this film's theme.
The problem with Alcohol is you feel at your worst physically first thing in the morning at a time when you wouldnt drink. Then you slowly sober up during the day and then the cravings come on..I find the fonder I became of drink the more of an empty feeling i would have through out the day and i soon forget how bad the effect of my drinking was until i was suddenly reminded of it again the following morning.
This is hard to watch. My dad is an alcoholic and my close friend is an alcoholic..my dad has slowed down with age but my friend is a mess. He just messaged me drunk in fact, i don’t know what to do to help him. He won’t listen or help himself but he knows he has a problem. I tried tough love and shut him out but then i couldn’t stop worrying and felt guilty....so hard. Can’t deal with it all over again, its too much
Pray. I’ll pray too.
You've been a good friend Ella. My Dad was an alcoholic. That doesn't mean he was a bad person. He was a World War II vet and after finding out what he went through at a very young age, I can't blame him for drinking.
Sylvia Carlson of course, my dad is the kindest person I know. Mental health issues does not a bad person make..
As someone who's been sober from alcohol for 7 years just watching this makes me uncomfortable. Alcohol is evil yall!
It is the key to escaping this world. But yea it destroys you slowly but surely. 25 years of almost non stop drinking till the last couple years here. Only 3 or 4 times a week. Been through detox and rehab more times than I can count, liver is shot, health is shot, but I will never stop. There is no reason to stop anymore.
@@Mictla155 you still have your life! The fact that you keep trying and have improved shows you a reason to stop! I'm sure you'll get to a place where you can. Sometimes it's not about stopping the drinking first it's looking at and solving the reason why you drink
Lauren Bray Alcohol is not evil, you abusing it is.
It's only evil for those of us who lose control over it.
Trauma and the rumination on it is worse.
Great film.
I came to the realization when I was just 18. Been sober from booze for almost 3 years (in January). Best decision of my life. Still smoke good kush tho
happy for you! how did you stop? I'm kinda struggling
Guilherme Kuran I hung myself. Was dead for a few minutes. A few friends saved me. That’s how I stopped
This really nails the feelings so familiar. Those who know it know exactly.
I know lots of functioning drunks. My uncle was a drunk; he said alcoholics go to meetings.
Make one about mental health during quarantine
Splendid oh
We don't really need one about mental health during the quarantine. We are already living it.
This is on point. It's hard when everyone is telling you to drink up but since I started driving nobody encourages any drinking and instead accuse me of being as drunk as they are even though I am on 0% lol
I have never understood the alcohol addiction, because i always felt super sick if i drank more than one glass of some alcohol. I also can’t relate because alcohol tastes really bad to me. But I am a sugar addict and it gets so hard sometimes, that I dream of eating chocolate fudge. My question is: what part in drinking keep the addiction going?
The feeling. Literally compare it to your sugar addiction and how that makes you feel...
The confidence, the haze and everything is interesting illusion. Not an alcoholic and very rarely drink (try 5+ year gaps in between. Last year during my younger sis' wedding.) but, am more observant drunk.
I could care less about sugar but could easily be an alcoholic/drug addict if I didn't have a family and had the money. It's the intoxicating effect, the way it takes you away from the world and takes the edge off of everything. Makes things easier to deal with.
Coming to terms with the disease is the first step in overcoming your demons!
Im going thru this right now, really weird timing.
cassandra williamson Get some supportive people. Some like the one year, no beer online group. Maybe work with a counselor or coach. Emotions will come up and may feel overwhelming but you can do this!!! 🙌✨
You're stronger than those goddamn liquor! Take back your life, don't let it control you!
Things come into our lives for a reason. Jump and the net appears.
If you are still looking for help, look into Naltrexone. It's a miracle drug for many.
Everybody here remember you don't stop forever just One Day at a Time and you can do this. Get a support system that doesn't use and stick with them so they can help you get thru the wilderness to better times and sober lives