Room for Nuance

Prompted by a Guardian problem page with Phillipa Perry (see my community feed/tab). Also in the context of my own late diagnosed #audhd experience and the back and forth between discussing ableism and dehumanising pity as well as whether it's okay to feel sorry for ourselves. Internalised ableism is something more than feeling sorry for ourselves. It doesn't all have to be macho overcoming or denialism, compassion isn't just a kind of softened toxic positivity. But the power dynamics and the distancing, ostracizing aspects are key to understanding the difference between pity as a bad thing and compassion that might allow for some self pity. Some lament. But as a nuanced summary and rule of thumb, what we pity we pitch to ourselves and others as "less than" and incapable - which isn't always practical, nor loving or kind.