How Does Direct Compare To Informative? | Communication Style | CS Joseph
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- Опубликовано: 1 дек 2024
- Today we will discuss communication styles and how direct compares to informative.
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I was gonna go to sleep but this takes priority
I've watched this like 7 times and here I sit 1am watching it again! Haha
@@henkster6067 same
😅entp enfp?
Same
I was gonna sleep too but this takes priority
As an INTJ, it just dawned on me how much I say to certain people (who are possibly informative) “what do you want me to do with that information?” People are always telling me shit and I’m always like yeah but what do you WANT?!
Well said. I noticed that today on the discord.
@Andria - Hahaha .... YES! I also just want to 'know" what it is they want. But as an INFJ, I try to be more diplomatic about it lol. This video explains so much. Thank you C S Joseph. This is truly valuable information because we can be a little more understanding of others and vice versa.
I ask, "and my point is..." It works pretty well. They usually pick it right up and get to the point and I'm not a jerk in the process.
This happens with me as well.
shit I always have this conflict with my ESFP mom
I have an ENTJ sister and ESTP brother. As soon as one believes the other is trying to boss them around they're at each other's throats. They can go from completely civil to screaming at each other in three seconds flat over the littlest things.
"Do you get accused of being bossy?" *yes*
"Do you get accused of playing the victim?" /yes/
I'm the same! And I say what I mean but in a gentle way and using way too many words. But because I'm trying to be specific and want to make sure I'm understood. Like, we've run out of milk, would you be able to get some on your way home from work please as you did say you might stop off at the shop anyway. Sorry, not trying to be bossy! I tell people what they should do but try to not come across as bossy. But people still think I'm bossy lol. But am I direct? Not sure about that one?!
@@claytonia1586 Fi Ne Si Te?
@@TheGuyWhoCantPickAName I have never typed as that but I do sometimes wonder. Except on the tests purely to look at functions I scores for Ni and Ti are the highest and I type as an INFJ on practically every test and I've taken nearly 90! A couple of times I've typed as INTP but I can't imagine that I'm not a feeler? But I'm not tied to a type emotionally. I just really want to know my true type for growth purposes. Not to join any particular team! 😂
@@claytonia1586This is the same way I talk. I think this is informative because we are afraid of being disrespectful which direct people are not.
Very useful. As an ENTP I’ve changed my interaction style to my ESTJ and ESTP coworkers from informative to direct and it’s like magic.
I asked the milk question to my friend so i could type her and she replied "I go out and get my god damn milk myself" and i just
Ariya totally an INTJ 😗
lol...
It seems like your sentence got cut off.
And you just....what?
"MBTI is just a test. Nothing more."
I fully agree, a lot of people give too much weight to the outcome of MBTI tests.
PREACH IT
@@CSJoseph *Its just a test, nothing more*
*still proceeds to focus entire career and income on it tho
Shadow747 on the contrary he isn’t focusing on the MBTI. The MBTI is based on Carl Jungs 8 Cognitive functions so that’s what he is focusing on. Also the MBTI is the most popular personality type test that brings in the most viewers and gets the most clicks, which he has mentioned in a previous video I believe.
He also has a day job outside RUclips. This isn’t all he does. Just saying there is more then meets the eye.
Infp and esfj tried to only communicate directly for 2 hours... To practice different communication styles. It felt like we were arguing, while we weren't. It was a strange experience
Cs Joseph's videos on MBTI are incredibly detailed and informative. I love how he breaks down each type and explains their functions in such a clear and easy-to-understand way. It's rare to find such useful and insightful content online, and I think more people should definitely check him out. Keep up the great work!
ENFP: Shall we go get some milk together?
Omg I felt this in the pit of my ass
@@XoJupit3r ah yes very specific I like it
0:30 Direct vs informative
0:39 4 interaction styles
0:43 In charge or structure types (Direct, initiating, control based)
0:50 starter types (informative, initiating, movement types)
0:58 finisher or chart the course see it through types: direct, responding, movement types
1:05 Background types: informative, responding, control
1:56 example ESTP type is direct Estj is Direct because they are structure types
2:06 when it comes to them having relationships with other people
2:10 highest social compatability
2:12 ESTP: ISTJ or ESTJ
2:18,They like XSTJ
2:25 STJ they are both direct
2:29 ESTP expect people they want to be around most to be direct
2:35 they have much better time being around people who are direct than not direct
4:59 Direct definition
6:31 Direct: mandating in communication
11:48 Informative: statement about situation
21:53 summary: direct is being as specific as possible
22:29 Direct people are more task oriented
22:33 Informative: do not necessarily mean what they say or say what they mean
26:00
26:10 Specific vs not specific
26:13 directive vs informing
Thank you! 🥹
You're a life saver 😅
thank you
In my experience Informatives are rather more obvious because they/I consistently give more information and options than are necessary. However, I have known people who are by nature Direct, but due to issues of nurture, have a hard time asking for anything (especially in social relationships). So they can appear to be Informative, but what they are actually doing is hinting to get what they want, not informing.
And healthy/mature Informatives can sometimes seem Direct, especially in a work or task situation, when decisions are made and actions communicated and taken quickly. (Going all Speed Racer to get a job done).
Typing can be tricksy...
My childhood was basically explained to me in this video. Having both parents be informative and my sister and I are both direct....
25:57, the classic Chase Joseph “so.. anyway,” to let us know he’s winding down 😂 whatta cute man. Thanks for all you do!
true that
This just keeps getting better! I can’t wait for what’s next.
Long life milk.
Can’t believe I’m revisiting these 5 years later. Absolutely timeless. ENTJ here and absolutely love the rants 😂 Feels like I’m seeing different facets of the same topic which only adds to my understanding. Thanks Chase.
I have a humorous story with an INFP regarding miscommunication between direct and informative. I noticed she was standing and I wanted her to be comfortable to sit down so I said "Feel free to take a seat," and she flipped out and said "Don't tell me what to do!" It took me a while to understand what I'd said wrong, I guess it came across as bossy when I was just trying to let her know she could sit and relax.
Val Kyrie lol, I actually like bossy women, takes the guesswork out of things
C.S. Joseph right, sometimes I want to scream “just tell me what you want!” I don’t like when people boss me around but I do like when people prefer to state their wants and not expect me to mind read
dude, your saving my life. Im an unhealthy ESTP sent into my ENFP super by school and your breakdowns are helping me realign. thank you.
Lol I go through this with my mom and dad all of the time. My dad will say “Hey, the grass looks pretty high don’t you think?”. It annoys me and now I know why lol. Both of my parents are primarily imformative, while I’m direct!
Btw keep up the good work C.S. Joseph 😎
I guess they want you to mow the lawn.
lol
I got irritated just by reading this - intp
LOL YES! I’m definitely an informative type. I’m always being told to not go into so much detail about things.
I would LOVE the parenting lecture series!
Love this! It's really useful for management training actually: for example, we can advise direct people to be a little more informative when giving directions, and we can advise informative people to be a little more direct when wanting something. I'm an informative type from Canada where being informative is generally passable, but I had to learn how to be more direct when I lived in Germany as I quickly discovered that just stating the problem there got me nowhere! 😅
This is some real content. Your Extroverted Intuition is off the chart.
I like information. When people tell me that I like gossip, I reply "I'd rather call it intelligence gathering, but yeah".
Awesome lecture.
Oh, crap. This is why talking to my parents too much as they age has started affecting my communication style in a way I perceive as detrimental. They both come across to me as "gossipy" and it drives me crazy.
Gossiping is in no way intelligence gathering. Intelligence is how you handle new situations. Gossiping is talking about past experiences of other people, nothing new here.
Pro tip if anyone is having a hard time remembering how they act…..look through your text messages and emails. You were acting naturally in those situations so you can look at your interaction from a 3rd person point of view rather than relying on how you think you would respond. Helped me.
Thanks for all the work you put into all these videos. You are the only person on youtube who is teaching stuff like this. I owe all my knowledge to you!
Much appreciated.
Well as an INTP kid with an ISFJ mom, I learned pretty fast that I had to withhold information that could (and often would) be used against me later. I do it to this day and I also do it with a couple of ESFPs I know (esp with high Se users, b/c they often do get all ragey in the moment...and then I absorb their anger with my low Fe and get anxious and feel guilty/bad...so best to just avoid any potential issues like this). As a kid/teenager, I can remember my mom finding out things and being all hurt like, "why didn't you TELL me?" Uh, b/c ...logic lol. That being said, other informatives frequently annoy me (and this quality in myself actually often annoys me too haha). I love it when a nice INTJ or ISTJ comes along and just ****ing TELLS me what they want me to do.
Oh my. I am an intp with isfj mom and now an esfp roommate. Your words are true to the point. I feel so much relief talking to an istp and enfjs even. Somehow i feel enfjs are direct, but nice. They get it how to maintaint perfect balance
I love this lecture as it clears these possible pits of common misunderstandings between people. You also shake conclusions and then explain the weakness of MBTI - the too straightforward view of it, most of the time. Thank you C.
you're welcome :)
Two extreme examples:
Informative: My mom is always one information further. She uses rethorical questions. Do the lights have to be on? I am like, i dont know, do they? But somehow i knew that she wanted the lights turned off. Once i just said no, but didnt move, she simply got up and turned them off. She was not anoyed, but i was because i could not understand why she is communicating like this. Took me 20+ years and some lessons in communication to realise she is just saying Can someone please turn the lights off.
In the milk scenario she would say somenting like ,Who is drinking all the milk?,
Direct: In the office, my colleage used to turn the lights off and said/asked good? As I responded 3 out of 4 times ,yeah ok, she now just turns the lights off and does not ask anything anymore.
CS. Top notch! THANKS! I'm learning so much. I truly enjoy getting what I believe is the best!
Being around informative people is very, very hard for me personally. And I am informative myself, my ego is, but also trained to be direct.
Hey chase, I got an idea for you to use...
It isn't the easiest thing for me to identify interactions styles because even after watching your videos explaining the difference between direct vs informative, initiating vs responding, and control vs movement, I just can't think of many practical, real life examples...
Your explanation makes sense, and the few examples your gives, such as the one with the milk, are useful in understanding the differences, but not so much in learning to identify the differences.
I want to practise identifying the differences between interaction styles, but, of course, if I'm wrong when practising, I have no way of confirming whether or not I was right.
*Suggestion:* I think you should make a page on your website for practise exercises. Kinda like those worksheet handouts teachers love to give their students to practise, except it's digital.
On this page you could maybe have a few different excercise categories that users can practise, such as identifying interaction styles, or temperaments, or even cognitive functions.
Then, under each category, you could have a few example of real life sentences, maybe taken from your, "how to type" lectures, where the user would have to identify whether the sentence is direct or informative or so on.
At the end of the excercise, the user would be able to see how many answers they got right, and which ones they got wrong...
.
I think something like this would really help the community, and, if it's possible for you to do so, I really hope you take my suggestion and implement it or something similar.
I'm sure, a lot of others will also find this useful.
Enfp, I feel this could be an engineus concept...gold star 🌟
Excellent idea!!!!!
Great idea!
Infp here. I keep watching your videos, and want to keep going. They are very educational, and some of the best I've seen on the 16 types! It's changing how I think on all the aspects of this topic in a very good way. It's just a huge help to me. Thanks!!!!
Leslie Lane you are welcome
I'm an INFJ, but have (as of this last month or so) been striving to become "informative". Not because I feel there is anything inherently wrong with being direct, but because I am consistently accused of being a jerk (when all I want to do is help people).
My mentor (a very kind and patient fellow whom I believe is an ENFP) is so laid-back in how he shares information with others. Whereas, because I communicate in such a direct manner, my entire family (except my wife and kids) has disowned me. I never intended to have issues with them or anyone in the first-place. And though I used to teach irregular forces in certain small countries leadership principles and how to defend themselves, I am, in-heart, a pacifist. Yet, I have managed to alienate my entire family without any exceptions whatsoever (other than my wife and kids).
Good stuff. I hadn’t been able to understand why you didn’t just name the Informative category as “Indirect”, but this helped me to understand that the way Informatives avoid being direct can lead to literally providing additional information, and in some cases, being verbose. Great content.
Group chat could be another example of direct vs informative styles. In the group check for the kindergarden for example some parent write "I'm waiting for my kid" while others "Please, get my kid ready for me to pick up" or "I'll pick kid up in 5 min, please be prepared"
Just wanted to say this was a very good video. Good sound quality, on topic, and informative (pun intended). Looking forward to more of these.
Seriously, this video as connected a lot of dots for me on how typing through interaction styles works. Really exciting stuff
Direct, Affilitive, and Abstract..."Hey, I need you to go to the store to get some almond milk. Unless, you don't want to and you are busy, then I can go get the almond milk later. I don't want you to have to stop doing what you are doing. What if the store is out of almond milk? What if all of the stores in the area are out of almond milk?" The what if questions continue in my mind, and get even less plausible, until the milk is purchased. Welcome to my life.
I totally got it at the milk example. Perfect!
“Gimme the keys, mthafka” ~ The Usual Suspects (direct)
Just a clarification for something that went down in the discord server about my own type: Informative interacts but putting needless context in their words while Direct types give off points, it doesn’t matter how much they say. Correct me if I am mistaken, but isn’t informative like: ....A.....B....C, while direct is like: A,B,C,D,E,F......
The problem with the milk analogy is I would never ask someone to do something I could just do myself.
sounds direct to me
Same
OMG I totally just had a revelation as to why I clash with my coworkers SO MUCH. Most of them are concrete and Direct, I am informative and abstract. So when I give someone information about something that needs to be done, I don’t ask “can you do this” or even say “I’m going to do this” because I always felt like either one of those statements would be stepping on their toes, per se. Also, since I usually convey information to people of a specific role or are generally above me, I just assume they will know what I am talking about and they will just do it because most of the time, no one likes doing each other’s work unless they’re preoccupied with something else. Some of them have gotten irritated with me, and I never really understood why, because I always just assume that if they wanted me to do something, they could just ask me to, or if they need me to clarify something, they can also ask, so to me, it doesn’t seem that hard.
Working with people who have such a different temperament than me has been both a blessing and a curse.. on the one hand I often feel like a misfit, but I will shirk it off until someone “bullies” me because they can’t understand why I’m do something a certain way or where I’m coming from because a lot of the time, it seems they will jump to conclusions - I never thought that it could be because they perceived me as “manipulative”. Someone told me that if I’m simple and direct in my disputes - which I have a really hard time with because I never know what to really say in those situations in that very moment - they will most likely stop.
On the other hand, I’ve really had to exercise my vocabulary and thinking process to consolidate my thinking and information to be more precise. I kinda think of the upside down triangle effect: start with the most important, basic information, then work your way up as you go along if needed.. this doesn’t come naturally to me at all, and I have to make conscious effort to do it, but it’s really helped me get my point across in certain situations.
I'm 46 and only found out about the MBTI 2 years agoish. I only took the test to learn more about myself. So I could make changes. It's a label. I only use it for personal growth xo.
I like to throw a broad statement and let people decide cuz i don't want to be rude. Even with children. and if it didn't work then that forces me to be direct.
And i could see the massive difference when i listen to my direct brother talking, the other day someone was speaking to him and they just kept on rambling so my brother just went ahead and said " ok what do you want now? " with a firm voice
I couldn't believe how can somebody be so direct omg i was startled 😂😂😂
This makes life much easier for them 😂
I could listen to you all day. Thank you!
Why did it take so long for me to watch this. Excellent info, very useful, thank you.
(INFJ/INTJ? Here) Thank you so much for clarifying this. I was speaking a few weeks ago with an ENFJ male and I think I’m an INTJ female. I perceived his style of questioning as very manipulative. I can sense he wanted to get information out of me. He thought he was so skilled but I would catch him every time. He would fake being empathetic towards me which raised my intuitive alarm the most. Hypothetically speaking he would see I was anxious and would say: “I suffer from really bad anxiety...” he would wait for my response. I don’t know what he wanted to do with this information. However I would respond using principles, almost never giving my opinion. I learned to respond this way to narcissistic personality types. Although he didn’t seem up there in the narcissistic spectrum, he definitely wanted to get info from me. He was shady af!
I have often been accused of being shady af for the same reasons :(
C.S. Joseph there’s an extremely UNHEALTHY ENTP older female I know. She claims to be a psychologist but works in sales; apparently she doesn’t know about the MBTI (maybe has to do with her studying in another country or maybe she didn’t study that at all). She’s passive aggressive towards me and loves to make me insecure. It’s so amusing for her. It doesn’t work because I’m self aware and can read her like a cheap book. She lies a lot and wears masks. I’ve told her a few intimate things only for her to use that info against me. She also likes to manipulate ppl into doing things that won’t benefit them. In addition, she likes making people fight by talking negatively (usually smearing them) to each party behind their backs causing them to fight. Then she wipes her hands clean, also uses people (has an ISFP partner) to do her bidding for her. He usually collects intel for her and reports back to her. She marries men for their money. I try to avoid her as much as I can. When I speak to her I also speak in principles.
I have been speaking in facts or data. I may try principles. Not sure how that would work though.
Great video, definitely helps clear things up.
I also like how you mentioned that types in the same quadrant don't get along (partially) because they already know what the other is thinking... Makes a lot of sense! And as an INTP with ESFJ mother, "ESFJ President Obvious -- because Captain isn't enough -- made me chuckle. I know that struggle haha.
I'm not an ESFJ but I tend to explain things to people that they already know before moving onto my point. People misunderstand me as thinking that they're stupid but it's just a precautionary measure because I don't know what they know so want to make sure they get all the context before I make my point and there are no misunderstandings.
I often do the same as you, and I think that's fine. What my ESFJ mother does isn't quite the same... It's as if she has no awareness of what other people know, or want to know, at all. She will often say obnoxiously obvious things, and other times she will omit critical details. Like when you ask someone a question and they answer an entirely different question that they *think* you want to know, without ever actually telling you what you literally just asked. It often takes multiple repeats to get the answer you're actually looking for... by which point she will be angry or hurt because you made her feel stupid, even though she did it to herself.
I'm not saying all ESFJs are like that, or that it's unique to ESFJs. Just that you're giving my parent too much credit :)
I printed off your type grid and have been carrying it around for a week. Now I will know how to use it. Thank you. Direct type:)
I'm an ENFP and struggle with being more direct because I am afraid of stepping on toes or putting someone in an awkward position, whether it's asking for a favor or needing to tell someone to do something. I'm working on this though!
I actually almost got into a fight with an ESTJ, I'm an ESTP, because we were basically telling each other what our group should do, lol. She's fun to be around, a really good friend, we have the same sense of humor. But when it comes to power or making decisions for the group, one or the other has to take the backseat, or else hell will break loose
This is so fascinating. I feel like I am very direct naturally/instinctively. However ... my parents reeeeally didn't like that about me, and I found my friends becoming scarce as we grew older because of my boss-lady nature (even though I feel like I was reasonably polite in my delivery!). I remember making a VERY conscious choice around 13 years old to be more pliale and helpful and "softer" for the sake of self preservation. Maybe my Fe was finally kicking in to help out? Or maybe I was able to access ENFP at that point? Then enter major abusive relationship and it definitely didn't feel safe to be direct, even though beating around the bush has often felt like being boiled alive. Fun times as an adult relearning how to be true to myself while still respecting other people's "sensitivities" 😝
Direct people can give you an opportunity to choose too, to choose from the set of options they provided and you better choose the right one =)
😂 No, i actually want you to be direct if you don't like my directions and propose another solution
Thanks CS Joseph for helping me see the truth; I really am a DIC 🥴
this is really on point with the people i know - i cant wait to watch the rest !
This is so interesting! Gets to the underpinning of the types
That was quite informative with nice examples with summary too!
Direct: Bossy, Contain Action, Very Specific, Decisive, Have Choosen the Role in the Audience, Task Oriented, come out as sincere
Informative: Victim-Talk, General Statements, Require Context, Give Choice to Audience to choose their Role, more respectful to the audience, com out as manipulative
As an INFJ , with my directness. I have this you can't tell me what to do, but suggestions and information are welcome.
It is not out of arrogance. When people meet me they have this impression. if the know me long enough , they tell me I am very deep for them to figure out what really works or not.
I don't tend to over inform others about me. It is uncomfortable. If I write to much for someone, it is the last resort for them, before the door slam. This does not happen unless they are very significant for me. They are allowed and even welcomed to inform me or tell me why they did ... how do they intended to deal with the situation. I really listen and may change my mind, it depends.
Most people don't understand the mixture of being direct and using figurative speech . But I mean almost every word. I tend to deliver the message with gentleness , as much as possible.
My mum ENTP always tells me that I can get what I want and out perform everyone and I can do more. But she hopes I would do things she would do, when she is informed. I feel a deep no. But when she uses her Ne to give me choices and options , my heart sings.
In a problem we had lately , I took the lead telling her directly what to do to solve it. And voi la it is solved , after so long of her feeling confused about what to do. I was sucking in my thoughts on how to do it out of fear she may feel upset.
She is smart and can solve many problems, but I am bolder than she is . May be because I am an Aries, she is a Libra.
I write this to tell you : thanks for your effort , that is right on the money.
Steadfast no matter how much animosity comes your way. I love to be informed on psychology. Great job. You are a talented teacher.
you are very welcome. I am an Aquarius, I am not sure that is relevant to what you are saying but fair enough.
I think I do actually tend to be more direct in communication when conveying needs for things being done, or asking coworkers if they need help when I've worked in factories and only have had a bunch of easy presses to run. I try not to ask for help though, because I know the managers then start considering replacing me, so I tend to just figure out how to do everything fastest so that I have more time. I suppose calling for more supplies from material handlers I sound more informative, but IDK, the bosses have to have everything said only within certain parameters. Novel phrases are met with confusion, so they require standard psittacisms.
I use few words when talking but I always get the milk. I don't tell people what to do most times. But I guess I'm direct more than informative. INFJ
My roommate is an isfp and I'm an infp. I loves how we communicates. He goes "Hey, can you do something for me please. A little effort but big pleasure. I just cleaned the oven, can you don't make it dirty please " with a nice tone and I really appreciate how he communicate with me this way. And when I need something from a supermarket, I'll ask him if he is going to a supermarket, and if yes, can he get me this and that too. I feel it's ok to ask because he's going anyway. ( since I has my own business, I learnt to be more direct with my employees otherwise nothing gonna get done [estj subconscious]) I think he's ok with that because for the next time he always asks if I need something from a supermarket, I never has to go to a supermarket! Haha I love sensor.
I am leaning toward direct (fewer words with a sincere approach, I struggle being overly verbose when it could be helpful) ... but I would definitely be informative in the milk scenario ... I just can’t see myself telling anyone to go get milk. I hope to figure this out. (ENFJ or ENFP)
When I was a child, my two older sisters, used to laugh at me, a Direct type, for telling them, "Come!" Come, they'd joke? I get it now. Both of them are Informative types. INFJ types are bossy too! It's actually pretty hard to tell quickly whether a person is Direct or Informative or not.
your videos are always so helpful. you are such a smartie
Omg and I was thinking as an INTP, why in the hell this ESFJ keep repeating what I just said :( --even if we text! I just informed him in order to help him make a decision and he is like "oh yes,*the thing you said*".
In the beginning I was think thinking that he is really smart and understands everything I said but then I realized that he doesn't understand anything but yet keeping repeating what I said => apparently he was looking to feel the experience of my logic (?) :D .
--Also he never makes a decision, it's like I give him all the info and the connections and all, but he still tells me "oh yeah, *the thing that I just said*"...and then "so what I should do?" ...omg.
Now I cut all the explanations and just tell him straight what to do...fast and simple.
Thanks Joseph!
Thanks this was a great explanation!
I really like to listen to informative things/people cuz it's more entertaining. It's weird when i watch short videos that just get to the point with little input. like where's the space?? 😂 I want to stimulate my mind with more things!
That's why documentaries are always my first option:D
I like to know as much as possible so i guess that's why i was the only one who liked to listen to teachers rambling about stuff off topic because i could learn about random information. That was fun 😂😂
So i like watching your lectures and listen to your rambling than watching other videos xD
Thank you, I needed more details about this.
you're welcome
I live with two informative people: an ENFP (husband) and, I think, an ESFJ (F-I-L). Both informative, but neither of them ever tells me (INTJ) anything. Example: my niece had her baby and neither of them said a word. Her baby was in the NICU for two weeks and neither of them told me. Grr.
My FIL often tells me, or tries to, the life stories of everyone he ever met. No exaggeration. We were in the car together for more than an hour yesterday and he told me about the educations, professions, and marriages of the men in his family starting with his grandfather. I tried to change the subject several times with no joy. He waited for me to finish and then picked up right where he left off. On one occasion, he deliberately steered the conversation to something he knew I didn't want to talk about, having set up the path to the topic step by step. When I asked him how we landed on that topic, wondering why we were talking about it, and he gave every step: A to B to C. He set it up.
My sweet, wonderful husband does something different. When I ask him a "what" or "yes or no" question, he doesn't give me the short answer I asked for; instead, he gives me lectures about how things work or why they are the way they are. I swear that he would give me the entire history of the idea if I let him.
I care about them both, so sometimes I bite my tongue and let them talk. It is definitely not my favorite thing.
This really helped me.
Super useful
I'm definitely direct!
Is there a video where you talk more about which types prefer interacting with informative people and which types prefer interacting with direct people?
Thanks for the breakdown. Super helpful.
Ok, I'm informative. Wow that was the easiest of them all! Also pretty sure my mom is too "oh your brother's room looks so clean, I'm always the one that has to clean everything, I made the food today you know, are you gonna say that thing there?,...'
Informative - I call it "beating around the bush". Just come out with it. If I need something. I ask directly, but nicely. "Shall I get some milk? Could you please get some milk?" Done - and all said with respect and no confusion. I say what I mean and mean what I say :D
good luck talking to those who cant help but beat around the bush.
@@CSJoseph My son (INFP) is like that. Lots of colourful people in my world.
yeah it really depends on who im around and what the circumstances are, an estp can be bossed around if the responsibility is stacked against them. theyll try and use logic to uproot the infp, these two two types have more in common than interaction styles would dictate. foreground and background interaction styles can be associated with how consciousness and unconsciousness influence eachother and integrate with eachother. ie the shadow has a tendency to overtly be dominant yet also has the capacity to be informative via archetypes.
I think I'm more direct than informative. I've a hard time when there's vacuum of power during some job and no one takes charge of the work. This happens especially during college activities and paperwork, so I may be quite bossy.
Wow! Different communication styles cause all conflicts I have with my husband. My ISTJ husband constantly gives me direct instructions, which drives me (INFJ) crazy. I feel like he treats me with absolutely no respect. On the other hand, he gets mad at me for not telling him clearly and directly what I want him to do. According to this theory, INFJs are the direct style types. I hate being told what to do. How can I do to people what I hate?
On the other hand, when I'm communicating with an Ne user, I feel like they've pulverize any direction our communication starts to take... It's like if I was direct compared to them, but informative compared to an ISTJ..... So now I'm completely confused. Are there just two boxes - direct versus informative or is it more a scale? Is it possible to be an INFJ and use the informative style? Or am I just hypocritically fooling myself that I use informative style because I hate it when people use direct style in communicating with me? I am not an INFJ? Is it because I'm enneatype 9 which makes me more dispersed and less direct?
OK, I'm very sure I'm an INTJ. I've seen all the videos on cognitive functions and everything fits: Te parent, Se inferior, Fe trickster, Ti critic (which I may be using now), etc., yet by how this video explained it, I often feel more informative than direct. In the milk situation, I might feel rude just blantantly saying "Go get more milk." Is this a matter of maturity, or maybe an issue of nurture? Perhaps I feel outshined by my ENTJ best friend. Maybe I'm not qualified to judge myself. Anyway, some help would be appreciated.
No matter how many times I watch this. I always end up not knowing where I fall under between these two. I avoid bossing people around, but I also fail at reading the subtext. It takes me years to figure out some one was displaying interest in me or flirting (still can't pick up on flirting unless it is between characters in a cartoon/anime/manga).
could be due to lack of Se or lack of Fe or lack of Ne or a combination of two of those.
@@CSJoseph Guess that would probably rule out some peoples hypothesis that I am an ENTP.
At about 27:21 you say "specific versus inspecific". It would be either, non specific or unspecific.
Really enjoying the breakdown of using the grid.
In the example of milk lacking in the refrigerator, there's a hugh contrast between the two preference in this dichotomy. I would love to learn about more about more sublte clues of directness or informativeness... like... how to spot a person's preference when watching an interview... or when I'm dating and I want to identify her type in the first interactions... to make sure she's not from my quadra...
Interesting you finally revealed your dad’s type - enfj... interesting! I’ve noticed enfj and I usually butt heads but we really respect and admire each other. My dad is ISTJ. - this is totally informative hahaha
There are informative people
and then there's CSJ
That's a very interesting approach. But... why do you have to be "bossy" to be "direct"? As an INTJ (I think) I'm way too busy with giving people a good experience to be bossing them around. But indeed, I always try to be as clear and unambigous as possible - which may sometimes make me sound informative unless you see why the additional information is necessary.
I'm an an INTJ and I can be bossy. Not all the time, but definitely sometimes.
What if you are an ENTP but you are more direct because of how you were raised and how ur past relationships shaped you to be more direct
I knew an ESFJ and they tended to ask questions when they had a grievance rather than explicitly stating the grievance. If it had been me as an INFJ, I would just state my grievance plainly. I guess that is informative versus direct.
Well. Im pretty sure Im ISFP but if we're out of milk I'll first state we're out of milk and then ASK if the other person can pick some up if they're out already or else we can go together or I'll pick it up when I'm already out but I would never order someone to go out and buy milk..
Informative becoming direct conciously "Would you be able to get milk on your way back?"
My brain kept applying the new information to the people in my life, so my imagination would start up . When I came to reality, I had to replay a whole minute or two.
What type are you?
Would the Direct person (if asking how someone was feeling) say "are you feeling good or bad?"
While the Informative would say "how are you feeling?" ?
Also thank you! This is awesome!
I (an INFJ) told someone (an ENTP) I liked him and wanted to spend more time with them (aka. not just sleep together), it was really hard for me to say it and also I've comunicated my difficulty in my delivery. I was expecting rejection anyways, but thought that at least in this rare moment of complete honesty and vulnerability, he would, as I see it "come down from his throne" and "tell me what he really thinks / be sincere", but no, he proceeded with some kind of a pathetic joke. At first I thought, ok, he just lives in denial and has to put on this shield to not be vulnerable even in this case, which hurt me a bit. I don't mind someone saying to me, that they are not interested, as long as they really say it! If someone makes an informing joke, I still don't know where I'm at and it feels like there's no real trust / no real friendship, because it rather looks like they are not considering it important, not taking it seriously. But after hearing this lecture, maybe I was wrong - maybe what I see as "self-defense shield of humor / bullshit", is actually a very indirect informing style... how can I ever differentiate between the two?
I often think I should just not interact with people and leave them alone, I constantly want to improve everyone (and myself), I want to tell them the things they don't notice, but often I feel like I'm just annoying people... People love spending time with me until I start being (too) direct, but direct to me feels like I'm being myself and honest, and not just playing along.
hey chase, enfp here. i think i am very informative, but it also freaks me out completely when people are such passiv and arent aware of the consequences if e.g. we have to work together and there happens to be a problem. that probably is either because i actually WANT them to be direct because i am the infirmative here, or it also might be because i am a trippled movement type which means i cant stand stagnation... this is something i've thought about alot...
Is this a good question to narrow down whether someone is direct or informative?
1. In your communication style, would you say you are more direct and prefer to say things a precise way to get to the point, with the preference or expectation of reaction? Or, would you say you are more informative, and prefer to say things in a roundabout way with ease of expression, with less expectation for reaction? Direct-types tend also to be more forgetful or less in-tune memory-wise with their past, whereas Informative-types tend to have better long-term memory, and be more in-tune with their past. Which type are you?
1. More direct
2. More informative
These are just diamonds…
THANKS!!!
I'm definitely direct with my communication style. I hate having to guess what someone wants, so I ask. This usually seems to surprise whoever is being informative with me. I can see now how I clashed with some people. They would just tell me information and then leave it open ended. So annoying. I guess I can be pretty jarring with my directness. I definitely had co workers help me be less direct and have small talk before hand. I think it's a waste of time, but I guess it makes people feel better.
Great video, this cleared up a lot of information about informative and control types for me. I’m on the discord and hopefully this will make me not mistype people in the #idk-my-type channel xD
The most funny thing (from an outsider perspective) or annoying thing (from an insider perspective) is a team of informative people who are planning on what has to be done and two days later, they start asking: "Uhm, who was going to do x?"