as a 21 year old whose adults in my life never really had conversations about this kind of stuff with me, this podcast is like, so extremely important to me. definitely helping me with thinking patterns and imparting wisdom for being an actual functioning adult lol.
As a 33yo sometimes it takes 2 awesome hommie buddies to share sage wisdom with ya for the first time. We all don't get the chance to have awesome mentors IRL but we can always choose the ones online who raise us up
I sometimes feel shameful telling friends or family I consume media related to self betterment... Perhaps it's a toxic internalization of a precedent set by groups of people set in their unwillingness to change, and a negative perception of those who do. In any case... Reading other's comments of how it helps them makes me feel better. Is this going against the exact theme of this episode? Maybe...
After 40 years of marriage I’m still learning new things about my husband. I think this is a good thing because how boring life would be if we 100 percent knew our spouse after 10 years and had nothing new to uncover.
For Impulse: I have met many Americans that actually are introverts and shy, but puts on the work face in the professional life. You actually do the same thing in your Minecraft videos, where you are an extrovert, fast talking guy, but in your streams and this podcast especially you are much more authentic. This version is much more heartfelt in my opinion. That said; we love you. Whatever you do, keep doing it, you are doing it right. ;)
As John Green says "Don't listen to your haters, but also don't listen to your loved ones. The haters are blinded by what they hate about you and your loved ones are blinded by your incredible beauty and awesomeness." I like that qoute.
That's a nice quote. And I can confirm about the loved ones. Im trying to learn how to draw and sometimes I legit have to beg some friends to criticise my art instead of just saying "nice art as always". I want them to sometimes say "this looks strange" so I know that that is the aspect that is lacking and thus could be improved
Reminds me of the story of the 3 faces. Everyone has 3, the face they show the world, the face they show their inner circle, and the face they show themself. Which is the real face
Hey Skizz, thank you for that comment about "The people whose opinions I care about aren't set in stone; I can take them off the list." That was a really neat perspective and I needed to hear that today. I really enjoyed hearing your thoughts on this podcast. Thank you both for sharing!
Hi Impulse, hi Skizz! This was an amazing video and it actually inspired me to write out this comment because I definitely usually don't. TO SKIZZ: When you were describing throwing away that negative energy and kept saying you're not crazy, it really struck a cord with me. I'm a graduate student studying counseling psychology and I just wanted to let you know that what you're describing is a guided visualisation and it's very common in mindfulness based therapy. You definitely don't sound crazy at all! It's an excellent technique for letting things go when they don't serve you. It makes sense why you're aware and in-line with who you are. TO IMPULSE: I think we can all relate to you, Impulse, after all as human beings, we all yearn for acceptance from our society. Its just part of our hierarchy of needs! However, I do want to give you proof as to why you shouldn't engage with those who leave nasty comments. I will freely admit that sometimes I'll watch something on social media that makes me want to comment something nasty and it's never for the benefit of the creator. It's almost always because of some insecurity within myself or because I want other people to feel the same. Thankfully I recognize that when it happens and I stop myself because I've built up that self-awareness and I DON'T want to put that negativity out there. So keep that in mind next time there's a mean comment. This is a person that either doesn't have the emotional maturity to know how to move-on or someone who actively wants to put that negativity out into world and we don't want to amplify that. AMAZING episode and as always, we apprecaite you both for the effort and pieces of yourself you put into this podcast
Thank you, Emilyy for sharing the information about the guided visualization. I am not a spiritual person but have been working on this with my therapist and when Skizz described it, I wanted to leave a message (which I never do) to legitimize what he was talking about. I was so happy to see someone beat me to it. :) Thank you!
Hi gentlemen. This is probably gonna be buried but I just wanted to leave a comment with my appreciation for you both. I’ve been watching the podcast since Scar was on and every episode since (and most of the ones from before that but I’m not fully caught up yet) and I wanted to express how inspiring this has been. Sure some of it is just for fun but when you’re both getting down to brass tacks it’s real. I’ve taken so much inspiration from Skizz’s outlook on life and Impulse’s too. And this one in particular has helped me shift how I’m going to interact with the world going forward. Thanks Imp and Skizz. My husband and I watch Skyblock and N&S (and of course the Life series) together and love your dynamic and watching this podcast has been a great source of joy and inspiration. Please keep doing what you’re doing. 💜 ~Cass
I wanted to write just what you wrote here! I hopped on podcast with scar and since then watched every podcast they have, and i learned very important things for my age.
(51:10) This made me suddenly realize that what Skizz was talking about was describing someone with NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) (I have a co-worker clearly with that disorder although probably never diagnosed) and what he was saying was what I have also found to be the best way to deal with someone with this disorder. Skizz was just pressing on the point of half of this disorder, the tearing down of others to bring them BELOW themselves. There is also the characteristic of falsely building themselves up. And, like Skizz, I do find myself pitying someone who has this disorder, who has not progressed emotionally past 2 years of age their entire life. NPD has dibs on the person's heart, soul, and mind and it seems like to me that that would be a terrible way to live. I was impressed at Skizz's wisdom to come to that conclusion. It took me a few years to come to the same one.
Spent most of my life as a people pleaser because the weight of others' opinion of me was crushing. Only in the last few months was I diagnosed with ADHD and RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria). At a point now where I've learned to let go of the majority of others' opinions, but a few can still trigger a spiral episode based on how and what they say about and to me. Anyone who has met you both would never think you're jerks. You made me feel welcome and chill. I did my best to reciprocate that.
58:22 I haven't read through the other comments, but that technique is visual meditation of sorts. That's not crazy and it's actually really good because it allows you that separation between you and your feelings to allow yourself time to choose your response rather than reacting.
Another great episode! Teenage daughter and I were talking about this the other day. I am an absolute people-pleaser -- always have been. As you said that's impossible to do, but that doesn't stop me from trying! And I internalize criticism and totally downplay praise. (And only a handful of people know the "real" me.) She says she doesn't give a care what people think, but she admits she is a different person depending on whether she's at school, at church, with her ballet group, or with her theater company. But we both agree that "not caring what people think" is not license to be a jerk. Great discussion! Thanks!
8 years ago we found out that my son and I are autistic. It has been liberating to know why I am the way I am but the hardest thing is being concerned about being “normal” so I have spent my whole life masking to fit in but when I turned 40 (I’m 44) I stopped caring about what people thought and I embraced my real self. I work in a school, in a disability unit and I sing and dance all the time without care. My work mates are amazing and it’s great when they embrace the silly singing and dancing too. Be you and embrace it wholeheartedly!!
Ok I started watching this podcase because of the special guess stars like mumbo, Martyn, scar, and tango. But now Im loving how deep and real these conversations feel and make me think and I just love what you guys are doing cuz I thought it was all going to be laughter and funny moments like the intro jingle suggest but these deep conversation are very welcomed and honest I argue more important especially on youtube where everyones trying to make you laugh you guys are trying to make us think and feel and I love it, thanks Impulse and skiz
I lived out my "Ginger kid" teen years in the 80's. It wasn't always easy, and I learned quickly not to give a s**t about what people thought of me. Even when it occasionally became physical. The hardest target to hit is a moving one. Don't let anyone try and stop you from being you. If you stop and look at the people trying to cut you down, they win.
Sometimes I feel like you two hear my struggles I throw into the universe because your podcasts almost always hit me exactly where I need them to… thank you both so much for this podcast and for your constant comforts ❤
I have a lot of social anxiety and anxiety in general so not caring what other people think has been a life long struggle. I'm actually proud that I've kinda improved on it in that I've become more okay singing in front of people recently. I love to sing but my family always told me i was bad at it growing up so I never liked to sing in front of other people. It's kinda feels dumb to admit, but the only reason I've become more comfortable with it is that some of my friends have told me i have a good voice recently lol
I absolutely hate that I can't listen to this while working. You guys are just way to horribly interesting to listen too. I just feel terrible not being able to give you 100% attention. So I save you for my breaks, it's like listening to sage mentors chatting by the coffee. Really appreciate all the work you put into theses.
59:45 what skizz talks about here, we actually saw this on Bluey, where the little kids teach this to their dad too, about letting go of those negative thoughts, and genuinely, seeing that at that specific time where I was going through weird stuff, it made me tear up seeing the adult in the situation learn how to be happier from the little kid, and I treid it and it actually does make you feel better, you just gotta accept too, that you're letting it go.
ImpulsSV, don't ever you think you don't belong. When I found out you were part-time on Hermitcraft I gained so much respect for you. What you achieved with what time you had was amazing and inspiring. Keep up the amazing work.
we have these printout cards of mother teresa quotes in my house and there's one i think about all the time, "if you are humble nothing will bother you, neither praise nor slander, because you know what you are", this episode really hit that point! its such a powerful thing to understand
Excellent podcast, so glad you guys took on this topic. There are kind of two additional sides to this in my mind. The first is that while we might not care about how people perceive us, we do care about how people perceive our intentions. I don't care if people think it's silly or dumb what I like or am into. I do care how that affects others. I never want to hurt others or make them uncomfortable, but even more so I don't want them to think that I ever would. The second is usually if I'm nervous or embarrassed about an aspect of myself, it because I'm concerned that there's something wrong with it; that it's hurtful or offensive to others. But that the opinion of others is absolute truth or a proper moral compass, but it causes me to question my stance. This is a topic that really hit home for me because I struggled with self acceptance and the thoughts of others. It wasn't until college that I finally stopped being concerned with everyone else's opinions, but i wish i understood these aspects of life and myself a little sooner...
Just checked RUclips, forgot it was Friday, saw this was uploaded and immediately smiled and clicked on it!! Always wonderful to see the Imp and Skizz podcast!
Skizz’s clarity of self knowledge is what has impressed me most about him. His self evaluation from early adulthood, from his stories, appears to have been very analytical, followed with plan-of-action.exe. In my experience, that kind of clarity of thought is rare. It plays into his ability to organize projects. I know of only one other person with that talent, and I’ve been around since the 50’s.
I’ve been working recently on unmasking and it’s so much harder that I thought it would be. I’ve been really trying to stop repressing my true emotions and reactions, it’s a very hard thing to unlearn though. It’s definitely a way of protecting ourselves, once you stop pretending people are reacting to the real you. And the real you can’t be changed. If someone doesn’t like you that way, that can hurt so much more than them not liking the version of you that you choose to present I’d like to see you both chat about parasocial relationships more, I’d be really interested to hear more about your thoughts and how it impacts you. It’s such a strange and new concept. I spend hours each day ‘hanging out’ with Impulse and learning more about him each day… but he has no clue who I am, nor probably cares. It’s an incredibly strange dynamic that platforms like twitch and RUclips comments and donation features have really impacted in recent years. Xisuma has spoken about it a little bit, but I’d love to hear what it’s like to be on the other side of that parasocial relationship. Is it intimidating or uncomfortable that so many people feel like they know you?
To add, Skizz that method of dealing with difficult feeling by physicalising them is definitely very normal and not crazy at all. I can struggle with dark feelings and to combat that I imagine myself surrounded by a bubble, the dark thoughts come towards me and bounce off my shield. They can’t touch me. It’s a coping technique my mum taught me as a child, and it’s been a life saver
I cared so much about what people thought that I was housebound with agoraphobia for 10 years, with severe social anxiety. I loved being outside, people just terrified me. Confidence training, assertiveness training and learning about my basic human rights from a wonderful charity linked to women's aid back then, helped me regain control of my anxiety and life. Confidence is a big part of caring what people think. FYI I have worked as a customer assistant for 7 years since overcoming these issues. I Enjoy the podcasts guys, keep up the good work.
I think a lot of people tend to forget that the people they see on camera are only a very small aspect of the creator as a whole. Just because a creator has a one-off comment on something does not mean the viewers have the whole story, instead it diminishes their view of the creator to that one comment. Viewer comments are our view of what we see, and that has very very little to do with what the creator(s) life is like and thus should not have a really big impact on the creators as a whole. It's a thing that is much much easier said than done and to put it into practice takes a lot of work and effort but it is definitely possible! Y'all have wonderful insight on the space you occupy and i greatly appreciate it.
I'm with Skizz on "it took me forever to figure out what I'm supposed to do, but I know." and knowing what God designed you for and all the gifts that He intently put together in you is huge. It does kind of feel like a type of armor. I'm not quite as bulletproof as you but it has fundamentally changed my life. At least, how I'm choosing to live it. And because I know Impulse reads all the comments, Hi! You're awesome and you're doing such a great job. I can really see all the hard work you put into your content by the quality and care. Thanks for another wonderful podcast, gents :)
As someone who went from severe social anxiety to not caring what others think- something that personally really helped me was realizing that no matter what fake version of me i show- people still wont like that, so why try anyways? I did start this mindset when my depression got worse, but now im way better and still think the same, people would see a character of me and still wont like it, so why doing that in first place? Strangely i do still have social anxiety, but i barely have any anxiety attacks anymore and i struggle with it way less. It took me time but you can definitely switch from one to the other.
I'm leaving a comment here to show support, although I already listened to it on Spotify earlier today. The fact that Skizz immediately jumped to sh*tting himself for the group of disgusted people is so hilarious! Thanks guys for a good laugh today ❤❤❤
As a 14 year old I deal with a lot of this. Most of the time I become quiet in public spaces. And an example of this is that I love to sing but i have stage fright Like when people catch me they say stuff like "you should make songs" or "why don't you sing more it's amazing!" And I'll never forget last year when I signed up for the music club. We worked on a singing piece in front of the whole school and the day we did it I froze. I couldn't do my part and it was literally just a small whisper. I'll never forget the next week the pastor of the church I'm in asked the youth group. (Which I'm in but never have solo parts) to do a song. I remember they asked me to do a part and somehow convinced me to do it. I remember I froze again but then he asked us to do it again and that time I focused on the lyrics on the paper and not the people looking at me, and I'm so glad I did! I wished I would've told my music teacher if I didn't sing to give me a failing grade bcs that would've pushed me to sing loud and clear.
This ones gonna be facinating to me because I don't really care what people think of me, however I'm worried about people deciding to hurt me (or more so those i care about) because i freely express myself and people have hurt me over that in the past. 5:08 then there's cases like myself where I'm like "oh someones watching? I better put on a show" My thoughts on a lot of the social anxiety stuff is just reframing it from "oh no they're looking at me and judging me" into "oh they're looking at me, they must thing i look attractive" Most people don't really care what others are doing. 12:04 nobody will ever know the real anyobody. No one can see all the thoughts in someones head. They can never truly understand you and that is just life. That doesn't mean you can't be close with people, because you can but the closest people won't know everything in your head. 18:18 I've always found this facinating when people describe this because I'm the same with everyone. Only exception of course is if I'm in a relationship then they get that part of me but other than that I'm just me. 24:48 Intresting. I don't often put much stock in what others say because they often judge without knowing what they're talking about. 28:01 This. Exactly this. 30:16 Yup. I wish more people would be more aware of this. 37:37 yeah. I have people assume that alot when talking to people. It seems they don't understand the concept of integrity for the sake of having integrity. 38:01 yup. I would hate myself if i hurt someone. That matters more than anyones opinion of me. Peace with yourself is more important than peace with others. One of my favorite quotes is "whatever helps you sleep at night" meaning that whatever you need to do to be at peace with yourself. 46:34 yup. I spend lots of time reevaluating my beliefs and values. Which is why i find conversations tiring when people don't know that stuff about themselves. How am i supposed to learn who you are if you don't know who you are? Everyone should know their own beliefs and values. And they don't have to be finite because people grow and change but just knowing where you're at is huge. 49:43 Skizz being awesome. I fully agree with that. You're allowed to hate people but the moment you decide to try and hurt someone then that's not okay. I've been discussing that this entire episode. 59:18 Skizz mastering his chakra like Naruto. I think it's honestly a good way to deal with things. Everyones got their own ways of dealing with stuff.
Very, very good episode. Like always! I loved hearing you guys discuss your two sides, and hearing Skizz's tips for this stuff. (no, I don't think your crazy, Skizz. I have heard about techniques similar to that, where you visualize your bad energy and put it into a box or throw it away) This story is kind of ironic, considering the podcast topic. I finished the video, and looked at the likes (I had already liked the video) and was curious if a dislike acted as a negative like, or if it was just separate information. I'm typing this because I clicked dislike to see what would happen, and it said "feedback shared with the creator" and I felt bad because it wasn't a genuine dislike, I loved the episode, and the podcast in general is great! I don't know how the "feedback is shared with the creator", maybe you guys wouldn't even notice. I don't know. I just know that twice now I hit the dislike button (Once for the experiment and a second time because I couldn't remember the message it said while writing this comment) and they weren't genuine, I love the show. That was kind of ramble-y and a little weird, so I'll sign off before I embarrass myself with my words. Have a good day, anyone who reads this!
Thank you for this episode. I am a lot like you Impluse. I sometimes care a lot more than I should about what people think and let it affect my mood way too much. I am now 48 years old and have been dealing with anxiety and depression since I was a teenager. Through the years of counseling and reading different books about living with these, I have noticed I have become hyper aware of my mood and I have started giving people I care about warnings, when I know I am having a day where everything will get to me. I have found making myself be aware of my own mood has helped some in controlling how others can make me feel. I train workers in my office for a living and I always share with them my stories about living with anxiety and depression as I have come to see it as a strength learning live despite having these issues and not letting them completely control me. I really hope that makes sense.
Lmao when impulse started talking about saying something you regret saying while streaming my first thought was Skizz talking about "Grian's spot" in phasmo the other day.
When I was 14, I went on a school trip with my hs choir class. One night in the hotel room one of the senior girls lectured me about how annoying I was, and how I needed to stop mimicking her friend by bringing a stuffed animal to school. That was the day I started to care what people think of me, and the day I started to mask who I really am.
The throwing away of negative energy that Skizz mentioned at the end is a very useful tool. A lot of people feel worse about having anxiety because they feel they don't have any control over it, mostly because it's not something that is usually tangible. Giving yourself a visual aid, even if it's only in your mind's eye can really help. The same goes for stress at work affecting your home life. Stressful stuff going on at work? When you park your car in the driveway and turn off the ignition, before you get out the car, imagine taking your work stress and putting it in a box and sealing it up until you're back at work next. By all means talk with your partner about your stress, as long as you keep the conversation healthy. If they are able to listen, show your appreciation and show them that you're happy you're in their company. If they aren't able to listen, find another time that's more appropriate to talk or things just end up frustrating on both sides. Loving Skizz's wisdom, and his willingness to challenge ideas and concepts that people hold themselves to. And having Impulse share his experiences alongside Skizz, the two of them just have such great energy. It's just so easy to sit here and listen to everything they have to say
I feel like I am on Team Skizz with this one 100%. I hardly get embarassed anymore. My lifestyle, my mannerisms, and how I look have contributed to me experiencing some extremely nasty people. What I have learned is that those people are always going to treat me that way regardless of what I do or say, so. Why should I bother with them? The only time I get embarassed anymore is when I do something that lets *myself* down. When I do something that I am not okay with having done to me is when I get truly embarassed. You guys gave some excellent food for thought with this one. Thank you.
As a 45 almost 46yo, I feel a lot along the line of Skizz. I learned along time ago to not give a crap what people think of me. If you like me cool, if you hate me, move along.
Imp and Skizz, you guys are almost like the father figure I never had, I get so much advice and I feel so loved and seen when I watch these. I am a colossal people pleaser. I mean, I will literally sacrifice everything just to make someone happy. But, this episode has left me in tears because I feel like I can finally do something to help with my anxiety and accept who I am. Thank you❤
I left a job yesterday after 13 years to pursue a similar career but one that might make me happier one with less stress from horribly disorganized management screaming at you constantly. I'm terrified to start this new job because what if I'm not good enough and what if people don't think I can hack it. I'm a tool and die maker which is a trade skill. I think this is exactly the video I need to listen to I'm currently on my way to drop my tools off and I start on Monday and I've never been more terrified
You got this! They have confidence in you so they hired you, but on top of that, they won’t expect you to be perfect at everything in a new workplace from day one! Allow yourself the space to be human, you don’t need to be perfect! Remember that they already have accepted you and you have so many years of experience, so trust in your own abilities, you wont let them down and it’ll only get easier with time!
@@SierraMysteriawow thank you so much honestly. After dropping my tools off where my stomach was in knots and I was ready to be sick I'm actually getting a little bit less nervous and finally getting a little bit more excited. I'm a pessimist and I'm a people pleaser and I'm full of self-doubt but the same time I know I'm good at what I do and I'm ready to be humble and wow people with my abilities. But seriously though your comment really truly brought tears to my eyes and I'm ready for Monday
You’ve got this! You are stronger and more capable than you think. Monday is going to be hard, Tuesday will be easier, and Wednesday easier still. A year from now you’ll look back and celebrate your decision. You’ve got this.
I start this podcast each week fully aware that i am going to learn something from you two. You both are so down to earth and real with each other and to us as well. Having a podcast that talks about these topics in the Hermitcraft community is so important. You have a wide range of ages that devour your content and take what you say to heart. I feel like most of your viewers are younger and having all of this amazing advise for the youngsters is so so so vital. Thank you for being so real and wholesome
The number of times I have heard Impulse say "I got hate from people for that" or "some people really didn't like that" and I'm thinking "yes, I saw that one comment too--and it was literally ONE. That is not 'people,' Impulse." 😂
Skizz, thank you for saying the things about your small list of people that you care about what they think of you. It meant a lot to me because in my life I’ve taken a similar approach. I’ve even had to remove my parents from that list. Which has been hard but necessary for my own health and my family’s happiness. Thank you
Skizz, I'm glad that you don't care what I think about you. I couldn't handle that kind of pressure. For the rest of us (like Impulse), I try to remember that "hurting people" hurt people.
I genuinely don’t care what something thinks unless know them. That wasn’t always the case, but a short time on social media changed that. If some person I’ve never met and never will wants to judge, make assumptions, or think I’ll of me; have at it. People in my life are there because there is mutual acceptance and respect. That’s what matters.
Skizz’s way of thinking is so foreign to me and how I was brought I up. it’s insanely fascinating getting a glimpse of how he sees the world. I’d hear advice from people like this all the time but giving his real life examples I feel finally pulls back the curtain to the “how” behind all that advice you’d normally hear or find when seeking for answers. Will definitely be rewatching this over and over again to soak it in.
I remember a while back Impulse saying that he reads comments, so I always leave him a comment because I think it's pretty damn cool that our opinions matter to him.
I am very much like Skizz, and my husband like Impulse. I have found that my ability to not care, makes him very uncomfortable when I do something that he feels like I should care what others think. I think that the answer is balance, once again! Love your podcasts!
I also use the visualization strategy. If im feeling very stressed or frustrated, I take a deep breath and I imagine all my negative feelings being drawn into that breath as this dark cloud. Then I exhale and blow all that negativity away. It works very well for me.
From somebody who use to be in a business where reviews and word of mouth counted heavily. One thing to remember is there are a lot more people who will like something and never say it. It's just a thing we speak out when we don't like it, we just like to complain as a species so always take it with a grain of salt or however that goes. The two of you are great people and should never change trying to please others. What you do helps people and risking that for a few haters isn't worth it. ❤
That is what is amazing about kids. Society has not changed them into caring what others think. It is society that has changed us to care what others think. There are situations where I can tap into that. When I do any public speaking, I do not care what others think about me, so I am not nervous.
From someone who is definitely struggling with a bunch of this stuff with low self esteem and caring what people care about her thanks for this podcast Just what I needed
I think I just drilled it into my mind that anyone who judges me like that is someone who I shouldn’t care about, because they don’t care about me. Once that was in my head, I stopped caring.
That thing that skizz does, I do that when I get nervous, especially if it turns into a nervous stomach. I will literally put my hand on my stomach, pull out with that same motion, and throw it away. It's not embarrassing, Skizz, it's a way to reframe your thoughts or something
Scar said when he was on the podcast, own who you are, wise words. I struggle but I'm getting better.(I'm a "bit" of a weirdo, peeps don't like me) I imagine holding up a mirror to them when they are mocking me and how they wouldn't like it. The mirror has become a little like a shield now. I'm 53, and life is a journey.
IMPULSE: its tough, but try see yourself through our eyes: You’re amazing, highly intelligent, really funny and an amazing content creator that inspired me to start my own channel. I have literally watched every video you’ve made for years because you always seeking perfection and it shows in every video you create! It’s inspiring and don’t look at negative comments, there are millions of people that really really like you! So stay strong and come back to this message when you need a pick me up. 💜💛 Besides the you have good health, love and good friends. There are strangers like me and my hubby that enjoy watching your content. Keep it up and never leave YT! @Skizz, you keep him here💙☺️
i really appreciate conversations like this as someone who lives in a constant state of anxiety lol, idk why there are days when confidence outweighs everything else and others where im just stuck overthinking
Hi guys, I was given advice when I was much younger, and here it is "What other people think of you is none of your business" So let the few negative people of this world have their opinion and continue your' great work. :)
Hi Skizz & Impulse! I just wanna thank you. You two have helped me a lot. I had a bad burn-out last year due to HSP (disorder giving me more insight to the meaning of things and perspectives, but more difficulty with being socially active). I am now building my life up again and listening to you two always brings a smile to my face. Impulse, you show a personality I relate to a lot, and the way you are able to express goofiness while being incredible responsible and caring is a goal I want to reach too. I don’t have a social life, but listening to the two of you makes me wanna thrive to be more social. Skizz, I admire your ability to make everyone laugh and your confidence in caring about others. When I think of Skizz, I think of someone who you could always have a laugh with. I thank the two of you for sharing your story, and for giving me confidence to pick my life back up again, River
On the topic of content creation, what I think is important to consider when it comes to criticism, or in general negative comments, is that often times they won't come from what you expect it. When I started, I thought those comments wouldn't bother me because I don't care if someone calls me dumb, I don't care if someone doesn't like my content. What surprised me is that I do care about certain comments that I never thought about. For example, I got a comment saying "On that video you said X word, and that was cringe" and it confused me so much why would anyone, not only get triggered by a random word, but also have the need to comment about it. Thinking about it with myself, I realised that I can take mean comments, but I'm more sensitive when the comments feel unnecessary and disconnected from the content. Like talking about knives and someone complains about the colour of the curtains in the back.
Skizz, you're not crazy! Visualizing breathing out negativity is very similar to a breathing technique used in yoga, and I have used it successfully many times through painful health issues I've been dealing with. I love hearing that it has worked for you to deal with mental/emotional stress as well, so I'm going to give it a try next time I find myself in that kind of situation. I feel like it's ok to care about what people think of you, but when it starts to inhibit who you want to be or it holds you back from doing something you truly love to do, that's when it becomes a problem. This was a really good topic. As always, another very insightful and thought-provoking podcast. Thank you!
I had a hard day today and this is exactly what i needed to hear, I especially liked the taking the energy and physically getting rid of it because a few years back my piano teacher (who was studying psychology) taught me a similar tactic to help with my anxiety and i forgot about it after hearing what skizz said i remember and will try to remember. Man i love this podcast
Skizz, throwing away the ball of anxiety... I do that too! I keep calling it a ball of fear, but most of my fear is started by anxiety. It really does help in the moment to give you some time to deal with the situation more rationally
I was first introduced to skizzleman on the life series and thought he was absolutely hilarious. I then ended up subscribing to his channel and found him genuinely funny and interesting ever since. Thanks for the laughs skizz. 🙌🏾 I've been an impulse sub since HC6.
5 minutes in, gonna comment before I forget. Once when I was like 17ish I was coming home on the train. And it was like 1am and no one was on the train at the end of the line. And having a whole train to myself I decided to do a little musical number using the poles. It was great.
Had to comment this, sincerely hope you see it. I watched through the video and it was great. RUclips auto played to the next video which just so happened to be TangoTek 2 stream he uploaded today. So we go from your insightful thoughts to Tango immediately starting with “Anyway…” the timing was too perfect, genuinely laughed out loud. Love your guys content, thank you for continuing to share with us
I'm 60, and my best friend is 64; we used to always say that we would dance to a dial tone, and it's kinda true (we danced a LOT to Nine Inch Nails), but I'm married to a man who does NOT dance. So, yeah. I dance with my best friend (for 46 years). I'm sure your wife understands why you don't wanna dance, Skiz. We all do. :)
I listen to this podcast often, thank you soo much for sharing your thoughts about so many parts of life! It's nice to know that there are others in the world who share a lot of my ideals and life thoughts. Another thing I've discovered listening to you - I'm the same age as you, and I have no one around me to talk to about my gaming or inner thoughts. Thank you for sharing!
I may or may not have one Karaoke singing experience . I got up on stage to sing “Take me Home Tonight” by Eddie Money. Never again, realized very quickly that I sound good to only me. 😅 -- 31:17 That’s a given with anyone in entertainment; however, uno reverse applies here. -- AH HA!! Skizz does care… though he’ll miss the joke as he wasn’t present for that season. Imp?
Such a great podcast guys! I genuinely appreciate the work you guys put in to not only what we see with the finished product, but all the effort that goes unseen. ❤
I have been watching you guys for almost all of your podcasts and it is a very uplifting relaxing time for me. You cover great topics that get to the heart of the matter. Per this episode, people take advantage of the anonimity of the internet to attack others and many of them are pointing out things that they see in the mirror. They use it to point out what they think are other people's flaws to make them feel better about themselves. The internet can be a thief of the confidence in the presenter. Keep up the great work and best of luck
As a recovering people pleaser I'm with you impulse! Skizz when is your Ted talk coming out? Another podcast that reminds us all that we are all human! Also as an energy healer everything is energy so to actively focus on releasing and letting go of the negative energy that comes with the negative comments, situations in our life is hugely helpful. Perhaps not crazy skizz just naturally connected to how things make you feel. Thank You Both! Love your podcasts!
Worry comes from the possibility of loss. Of struggle or difficulty. You worry because we are taught that our actions can effect our relationships. We could lose or lose the respect of these people. There is no guide or slide rule of acceptability.
Great podcast, lots of valuable advice. Like Impulse, I’m a people pleaser and full of anxiety. It sucks, and I’m actively working on it. The book “Untamed: stop pleasing, start living” by Glennon Doyle was recently recommended to me. I haven’t started it yet, but wanted to mention it in case it helps others. Best of luck on your journey Impulse, great that Skizz is there to guide you.
I have nothing but admiration and appreciation for the both of you and the hermits! As far as getting wrapped up in negative comments, assuming this is on an episode vs a VOD, I wonder if having a separation helps. And I mean like… those negative comments aren’t for YOU, they’re for Impulse. And I know it’s somewhat synonymous, but Impulse is a character. And that can act as a sort of buffer. Like in the Harry Potter realm of fandom, some people HATE Snape… LOATHE him. But that has no standing about Alan Rickmans acting or who he is as a person. Just the ramblings of 23 year old nonsense, but I absolutely love all your work, the two of you
Not caring what people think on the extreme opposite can be just as bad, if not worse. That midframe will turn you into a self absorbed jerk. But as skizz said it's not a matter of not caring about what people think it's a matter of being selective of who's opinion you listen to. I've always said, "the closer you are to me, the more your opinion matters." My wife can say things to me that will cut me to the core, because she matters most. But a random customer or guy on the street they don't phase me. I married a people pleaser though so I fully understand the dynamics of your relationship. And just like I can have thick skin and let things roll off my shoulders.. my wife has an incredible knack for censoring me when I don't care enough to not speak my mind.
I actually went through this several years ago. A convention I went to around that time had a lip sync contest, and I was debating on entering. It took a lot for me to do it, but I got over myself and performed "Breaking the Law" by Judas Priest. While dressed as Joker from Persona 5.
Thank you, both of you. Along with this episode, every one of these podcasts is just about what I need to hear, especially as a hopeful very small content creator. Please let this podcast continue for many, many long years.
Hey skizz! Thought I should let you know that you’re not crazy! The whole “throwing away a ball of burning anxiety away” thing sounds like a variation of a breathing technique for overwhelming emotions, and so many people do something similar! It may not make sense to some people, but it can be really helpful for anxiety and I’m glad it works for you :)
Super late comment because I am behind in the podcast, but what Skizz was describing with the ball of tar-anxiety and throwing it out is something a therapist recommended to me years ago. It is a technique to imagine your anxieties or fears as an object that can leave your body and be tossed out or replaced with something that brings you calm. So not crazy at all!
I loved this one!! My best friend and I are the exact same way where we’re on opposite ends of the coin with this. He cares very much about what others think of him and I care very little. I’m definitely going to send this podcast to him. Thanks for all the laughs and helpful advice
This is a really good (and relevant) topic for this week. I’ve already done the journey of starting out more like Impulse and landing closer to Skizz’s take, and I’ll say understanding and feeling secure in yourself is a MUST, or life can get confusing. You gotta allow room for personal growth, but also don’t let others influence the moral code you live by - no one is a saint and someone else’s view might be just as skewed, they just might be more confident to declare it as fact. Another thing is taking back control, as negativity from others or negative emotions can put you out of it. The only thing within your control is how you react outwardly, and there’s something to be said for fake it til you make it. If you act like you don’t care for long enough, you might eventually internalise some of that. I will say, Skizz’s mindset may seem completely unattainable for many people relating more to Impulse, but progress to any degree is still progress 🤍
You can absolutely learn to let go of other peoples perceptions of you. But it takes either a lot of want to or a lot of pain that forces it. It’s hard work either way.
Omg! Dance like nobody is watching and sing like no one is listening, is something I've been telling my daughter since she was old enough to understand!
*Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional.* @58:48 I believe what Skizz is describing is a form of visualization. It is a legitimate method of emotional management and meditation. Common visualizations include grounding where you feel positivity coming up like water through roots or bubbling where you build your unwanted emotion or thoughts in your mouth and "blow" them into a bubble that you push away.
YES I was just about to write about this! Yes, this is strongly rooted in meditation, yoga, martial arts, and anything that discusses Chi. I learned: breathe in the good energy, breathe out the bad energy. It’s really helpful!
![BLACK BAG - Official Trailer [HD] - Only in Theaters March 14](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Du0Xp8WX_7I/mqdefault.jpg)
as a 21 year old whose adults in my life never really had conversations about this kind of stuff with me, this podcast is like, so extremely important to me. definitely helping me with thinking patterns and imparting wisdom for being an actual functioning adult lol.
Good for you for recognizing an area for improvement in your young life and finding a valuable resource to learn from. You're on the right track!
As a 33yo sometimes it takes 2 awesome hommie buddies to share sage wisdom with ya for the first time. We all don't get the chance to have awesome mentors IRL but we can always choose the ones online who raise us up
There are far worse role models. Keep listening.
I sometimes feel shameful telling friends or family I consume media related to self betterment... Perhaps it's a toxic internalization of a precedent set by groups of people set in their unwillingness to change, and a negative perception of those who do. In any case... Reading other's comments of how it helps them makes me feel better. Is this going against the exact theme of this episode? Maybe...
Moral of the podcast: Stop chasing everyone else's cookie and bake yourself a cake.
I love cake!
@@shaunacall4685:)
After 40 years of marriage I’m still learning new things about my husband. I think this is a good thing because how boring life would be if we 100 percent knew our spouse after 10 years and had nothing new to uncover.
For Impulse: I have met many Americans that actually are introverts and shy, but puts on the work face in the professional life. You actually do the same thing in your Minecraft videos, where you are an extrovert, fast talking guy, but in your streams and this podcast especially you are much more authentic. This version is much more heartfelt in my opinion.
That said; we love you. Whatever you do, keep doing it, you are doing it right. ;)
As John Green says "Don't listen to your haters, but also don't listen to your loved ones. The haters are blinded by what they hate about you and your loved ones are blinded by your incredible beauty and awesomeness."
I like that qoute.
+
That's a nice quote. And I can confirm about the loved ones. Im trying to learn how to draw and sometimes I legit have to beg some friends to criticise my art instead of just saying "nice art as always". I want them to sometimes say "this looks strange" so I know that that is the aspect that is lacking and thus could be improved
Reminds me of the story of the 3 faces.
Everyone has 3, the face they show the world, the face they show their inner circle, and the face they show themself.
Which is the real face
Perhaps we don’t have just one…maybe our real selves are 3-faced…and that’s ok as long as we are ok with the 3. Hmm? Food for thought.
Hey Skizz, thank you for that comment about "The people whose opinions I care about aren't set in stone; I can take them off the list." That was a really neat perspective and I needed to hear that today. I really enjoyed hearing your thoughts on this podcast. Thank you both for sharing!
Hi Impulse, hi Skizz! This was an amazing video and it actually inspired me to write out this comment because I definitely usually don't.
TO SKIZZ: When you were describing throwing away that negative energy and kept saying you're not crazy, it really struck a cord with me. I'm a graduate student studying counseling psychology and I just wanted to let you know that what you're describing is a guided visualisation and it's very common in mindfulness based therapy. You definitely don't sound crazy at all! It's an excellent technique for letting things go when they don't serve you. It makes sense why you're aware and in-line with who you are.
TO IMPULSE: I think we can all relate to you, Impulse, after all as human beings, we all yearn for acceptance from our society. Its just part of our hierarchy of needs! However, I do want to give you proof as to why you shouldn't engage with those who leave nasty comments. I will freely admit that sometimes I'll watch something on social media that makes me want to comment something nasty and it's never for the benefit of the creator. It's almost always because of some insecurity within myself or because I want other people to feel the same. Thankfully I recognize that when it happens and I stop myself because I've built up that self-awareness and I DON'T want to put that negativity out there. So keep that in mind next time there's a mean comment. This is a person that either doesn't have the emotional maturity to know how to move-on or someone who actively wants to put that negativity out into world and we don't want to amplify that.
AMAZING episode and as always, we apprecaite you both for the effort and pieces of yourself you put into this podcast
Thank you, Emilyy for sharing the information about the guided visualization. I am not a spiritual person but have been working on this with my therapist and when Skizz described it, I wanted to leave a message (which I never do) to legitimize what he was talking about. I was so happy to see someone beat me to it. :) Thank you!
Everyone has to like this comment so imp and skizz see it! What an amazing message!
Hi gentlemen. This is probably gonna be buried but I just wanted to leave a comment with my appreciation for you both. I’ve been watching the podcast since Scar was on and every episode since (and most of the ones from before that but I’m not fully caught up yet) and I wanted to express how inspiring this has been. Sure some of it is just for fun but when you’re both getting down to brass tacks it’s real. I’ve taken so much inspiration from Skizz’s outlook on life and Impulse’s too. And this one in particular has helped me shift how I’m going to interact with the world going forward.
Thanks Imp and Skizz. My husband and I watch Skyblock and N&S (and of course the Life series) together and love your dynamic and watching this podcast has been a great source of joy and inspiration. Please keep doing what you’re doing. 💜 ~Cass
I wanted to write just what you wrote here! I hopped on podcast with scar and since then watched every podcast they have, and i learned very important things for my age.
Good news, your comment was the 2nd most top comment and has the 2nd most amount of likes 👍
Skizz saying, "I guess I slayed" that made my day.
Loved this one gents, thank you so much for your inspiring words. ❤
(51:10) This made me suddenly realize that what Skizz was talking about was describing someone with NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) (I have a co-worker clearly with that disorder although probably never diagnosed) and what he was saying was what I have also found to be the best way to deal with someone with this disorder. Skizz was just pressing on the point of half of this disorder, the tearing down of others to bring them BELOW themselves. There is also the characteristic of falsely building themselves up. And, like Skizz, I do find myself pitying someone who has this disorder, who has not progressed emotionally past 2 years of age their entire life. NPD has dibs on the person's heart, soul, and mind and it seems like to me that that would be a terrible way to live.
I was impressed at Skizz's wisdom to come to that conclusion. It took me a few years to come to the same one.
Spent most of my life as a people pleaser because the weight of others' opinion of me was crushing. Only in the last few months was I diagnosed with ADHD and RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria). At a point now where I've learned to let go of the majority of others' opinions, but a few can still trigger a spiral episode based on how and what they say about and to me.
Anyone who has met you both would never think you're jerks. You made me feel welcome and chill. I did my best to reciprocate that.
58:22 I haven't read through the other comments, but that technique is visual meditation of sorts. That's not crazy and it's actually really good because it allows you that separation between you and your feelings to allow yourself time to choose your response rather than reacting.
Another great episode! Teenage daughter and I were talking about this the other day. I am an absolute people-pleaser -- always have been. As you said that's impossible to do, but that doesn't stop me from trying! And I internalize criticism and totally downplay praise. (And only a handful of people know the "real" me.) She says she doesn't give a care what people think, but she admits she is a different person depending on whether she's at school, at church, with her ballet group, or with her theater company. But we both agree that "not caring what people think" is not license to be a jerk. Great discussion! Thanks!
8 years ago we found out that my son and I are autistic. It has been liberating to know why I am the way I am but the hardest thing is being concerned about being “normal” so I have spent my whole life masking to fit in but when I turned 40 (I’m 44) I stopped caring about what people thought and I embraced my real self. I work in a school, in a disability unit and I sing and dance all the time without care. My work mates are amazing and it’s great when they embrace the silly singing and dancing too.
Be you and embrace it wholeheartedly!!
I'm only at the 13-minute mark and y'all are already blowing this episode out of the water. Thanks, y'all. ❤
58:41 this is wild to me bc this is very much an actual therapy technique so it’s cool to see someone coming up with it on their own as well
Ok I started watching this podcase because of the special guess stars like mumbo, Martyn, scar, and tango. But now Im loving how deep and real these conversations feel and make me think and I just love what you guys are doing cuz I thought it was all going to be laughter and funny moments like the intro jingle suggest but these deep conversation are very welcomed and honest I argue more important especially on youtube where everyones trying to make you laugh you guys are trying to make us think and feel and I love it, thanks Impulse and skiz
I lived out my "Ginger kid" teen years in the 80's. It wasn't always easy, and I learned quickly not to give a s**t about what people thought of me. Even when it occasionally became physical.
The hardest target to hit is a moving one. Don't let anyone try and stop you from being you. If you stop and look at the people trying to cut you down, they win.
Sometimes I feel like you two hear my struggles I throw into the universe because your podcasts almost always hit me exactly where I need them to… thank you both so much for this podcast and for your constant comforts ❤
I have a lot of social anxiety and anxiety in general so not caring what other people think has been a life long struggle. I'm actually proud that I've kinda improved on it in that I've become more okay singing in front of people recently. I love to sing but my family always told me i was bad at it growing up so I never liked to sing in front of other people. It's kinda feels dumb to admit, but the only reason I've become more comfortable with it is that some of my friends have told me i have a good voice recently lol
I absolutely hate that I can't listen to this while working. You guys are just way to horribly interesting to listen too. I just feel terrible not being able to give you 100% attention. So I save you for my breaks, it's like listening to sage mentors chatting by the coffee. Really appreciate all the work you put into theses.
59:45 what skizz talks about here, we actually saw this on Bluey, where the little kids teach this to their dad too, about letting go of those negative thoughts, and genuinely, seeing that at that specific time where I was going through weird stuff, it made me tear up seeing the adult in the situation learn how to be happier from the little kid, and I treid it and it actually does make you feel better, you just gotta accept too, that you're letting it go.
ImpulsSV, don't ever you think you don't belong. When I found out you were part-time on Hermitcraft I gained so much respect for you. What you achieved with what time you had was amazing and inspiring.
Keep up the amazing work.
we have these printout cards of mother teresa quotes in my house and there's one i think about all the time, "if you are humble nothing will bother you, neither praise nor slander, because you know what you are", this episode really hit that point! its such a powerful thing to understand
Excellent podcast, so glad you guys took on this topic.
There are kind of two additional sides to this in my mind. The first is that while we might not care about how people perceive us, we do care about how people perceive our intentions. I don't care if people think it's silly or dumb what I like or am into. I do care how that affects others. I never want to hurt others or make them uncomfortable, but even more so I don't want them to think that I ever would.
The second is usually if I'm nervous or embarrassed about an aspect of myself, it because I'm concerned that there's something wrong with it; that it's hurtful or offensive to others. But that the opinion of others is absolute truth or a proper moral compass, but it causes me to question my stance.
This is a topic that really hit home for me because I struggled with self acceptance and the thoughts of others. It wasn't until college that I finally stopped being concerned with everyone else's opinions, but i wish i understood these aspects of life and myself a little sooner...
Just checked RUclips, forgot it was Friday, saw this was uploaded and immediately smiled and clicked on it!! Always wonderful to see the Imp and Skizz podcast!
Skizz’s clarity of self knowledge is what has impressed me most about him. His self evaluation from early adulthood, from his stories, appears to have been very analytical, followed with plan-of-action.exe. In my experience, that kind of clarity of thought is rare. It plays into his ability to organize projects. I know of only one other person with that talent, and I’ve been around since the 50’s.
I’ve been working recently on unmasking and it’s so much harder that I thought it would be. I’ve been really trying to stop repressing my true emotions and reactions, it’s a very hard thing to unlearn though. It’s definitely a way of protecting ourselves, once you stop pretending people are reacting to the real you. And the real you can’t be changed. If someone doesn’t like you that way, that can hurt so much more than them not liking the version of you that you choose to present
I’d like to see you both chat about parasocial relationships more, I’d be really interested to hear more about your thoughts and how it impacts you. It’s such a strange and new concept. I spend hours each day ‘hanging out’ with Impulse and learning more about him each day… but he has no clue who I am, nor probably cares. It’s an incredibly strange dynamic that platforms like twitch and RUclips comments and donation features have really impacted in recent years. Xisuma has spoken about it a little bit, but I’d love to hear what it’s like to be on the other side of that parasocial relationship. Is it intimidating or uncomfortable that so many people feel like they know you?
To add, Skizz that method of dealing with difficult feeling by physicalising them is definitely very normal and not crazy at all. I can struggle with dark feelings and to combat that I imagine myself surrounded by a bubble, the dark thoughts come towards me and bounce off my shield. They can’t touch me. It’s a coping technique my mum taught me as a child, and it’s been a life saver
I cared so much about what people thought that I was housebound with agoraphobia for 10 years, with severe social anxiety. I loved being outside, people just terrified me. Confidence training, assertiveness training and learning about my basic human rights from a wonderful charity linked to women's aid back then, helped me regain control of my anxiety and life. Confidence is a big part of caring what people think. FYI I have worked as a customer assistant for 7 years since overcoming these issues. I Enjoy the podcasts guys, keep up the good work.
I think a lot of people tend to forget that the people they see on camera are only a very small aspect of the creator as a whole. Just because a creator has a one-off comment on something does not mean the viewers have the whole story, instead it diminishes their view of the creator to that one comment. Viewer comments are our view of what we see, and that has very very little to do with what the creator(s) life is like and thus should not have a really big impact on the creators as a whole. It's a thing that is much much easier said than done and to put it into practice takes a lot of work and effort but it is definitely possible! Y'all have wonderful insight on the space you occupy and i greatly appreciate it.
I'm with Skizz on "it took me forever to figure out what I'm supposed to do, but I know." and knowing what God designed you for and all the gifts that He intently put together in you is huge. It does kind of feel like a type of armor. I'm not quite as bulletproof as you but it has fundamentally changed my life. At least, how I'm choosing to live it.
And because I know Impulse reads all the comments, Hi! You're awesome and you're doing such a great job. I can really see all the hard work you put into your content by the quality and care.
Thanks for another wonderful podcast, gents :)
As someone who went from severe social anxiety to not caring what others think- something that personally really helped me was realizing that no matter what fake version of me i show- people still wont like that, so why try anyways?
I did start this mindset when my depression got worse, but now im way better and still think the same, people would see a character of me and still wont like it, so why doing that in first place?
Strangely i do still have social anxiety, but i barely have any anxiety attacks anymore and i struggle with it way less. It took me time but you can definitely switch from one to the other.
I'm leaving a comment here to show support, although I already listened to it on Spotify earlier today.
The fact that Skizz immediately jumped to sh*tting himself for the group of disgusted people is so hilarious!
Thanks guys for a good laugh today ❤❤❤
As a 14 year old I deal with a lot of this. Most of the time I become quiet in public spaces. And an example of this is that I love to sing but i have stage fright Like when people catch me they say stuff like "you should make songs" or "why don't you sing more it's amazing!" And I'll never forget last year when I signed up for the music club. We worked on a singing piece in front of the whole school and the day we did it I froze. I couldn't do my part and it was literally just a small whisper. I'll never forget the next week the pastor of the church I'm in asked the youth group. (Which I'm in but never have solo parts) to do a song. I remember they asked me to do a part and somehow convinced me to do it. I remember I froze again but then he asked us to do it again and that time I focused on the lyrics on the paper and not the people looking at me, and I'm so glad I did! I wished I would've told my music teacher if I didn't sing to give me a failing grade bcs that would've pushed me to sing loud and clear.
Imp and Skizz are some of the best internet dads ever.
As a new content creator... this is scary but also a challenge to conquer.
This ones gonna be facinating to me because I don't really care what people think of me, however I'm worried about people deciding to hurt me (or more so those i care about) because i freely express myself and people have hurt me over that in the past.
5:08 then there's cases like myself where I'm like "oh someones watching? I better put on a show"
My thoughts on a lot of the social anxiety stuff is just reframing it from "oh no they're looking at me and judging me" into "oh they're looking at me, they must thing i look attractive"
Most people don't really care what others are doing.
12:04 nobody will ever know the real anyobody. No one can see all the thoughts in someones head. They can never truly understand you and that is just life. That doesn't mean you can't be close with people, because you can but the closest people won't know everything in your head.
18:18 I've always found this facinating when people describe this because I'm the same with everyone.
Only exception of course is if I'm in a relationship then they get that part of me but other than that I'm just me.
24:48 Intresting. I don't often put much stock in what others say because they often judge without knowing what they're talking about.
28:01 This. Exactly this.
30:16 Yup. I wish more people would be more aware of this.
37:37 yeah. I have people assume that alot when talking to people. It seems they don't understand the concept of integrity for the sake of having integrity.
38:01 yup. I would hate myself if i hurt someone. That matters more than anyones opinion of me.
Peace with yourself is more important than peace with others.
One of my favorite quotes is "whatever helps you sleep at night" meaning that whatever you need to do to be at peace with yourself.
46:34 yup. I spend lots of time reevaluating my beliefs and values.
Which is why i find conversations tiring when people don't know that stuff about themselves.
How am i supposed to learn who you are if you don't know who you are?
Everyone should know their own beliefs and values.
And they don't have to be finite because people grow and change but just knowing where you're at is huge.
49:43 Skizz being awesome. I fully agree with that. You're allowed to hate people but the moment you decide to try and hurt someone then that's not okay. I've been discussing that this entire episode.
59:18 Skizz mastering his chakra like Naruto.
I think it's honestly a good way to deal with things.
Everyones got their own ways of dealing with stuff.
Very, very good episode. Like always! I loved hearing you guys discuss your two sides, and hearing Skizz's tips for this stuff. (no, I don't think your crazy, Skizz. I have heard about techniques similar to that, where you visualize your bad energy and put it into a box or throw it away)
This story is kind of ironic, considering the podcast topic.
I finished the video, and looked at the likes (I had already liked the video) and was curious if a dislike acted as a negative like, or if it was just separate information. I'm typing this because I clicked dislike to see what would happen, and it said "feedback shared with the creator" and I felt bad because it wasn't a genuine dislike, I loved the episode, and the podcast in general is great! I don't know how the "feedback is shared with the creator", maybe you guys wouldn't even notice. I don't know. I just know that twice now I hit the dislike button (Once for the experiment and a second time because I couldn't remember the message it said while writing this comment) and they weren't genuine, I love the show.
That was kind of ramble-y and a little weird, so I'll sign off before I embarrass myself with my words. Have a good day, anyone who reads this!
Thank you for this episode. I am a lot like you Impluse. I sometimes care a lot more than I should about what people think and let it affect my mood way too much. I am now 48 years old and have been dealing with anxiety and depression since I was a teenager. Through the years of counseling and reading different books about living with these, I have noticed I have become hyper aware of my mood and I have started giving people I care about warnings, when I know I am having a day where everything will get to me. I have found making myself be aware of my own mood has helped some in controlling how others can make me feel. I train workers in my office for a living and I always share with them my stories about living with anxiety and depression as I have come to see it as a strength learning live despite having these issues and not letting them completely control me. I really hope that makes sense.
Lmao when impulse started talking about saying something you regret saying while streaming my first thought was Skizz talking about "Grian's spot" in phasmo the other day.
@@JinxedItMinecraft it was I think the Thursday before this episode came out but honestly I don't remember.
When I was 14, I went on a school trip with my hs choir class. One night in the hotel room one of the senior girls lectured me about how annoying I was, and how I needed to stop mimicking her friend by bringing a stuffed animal to school. That was the day I started to care what people think of me, and the day I started to mask who I really am.
The throwing away of negative energy that Skizz mentioned at the end is a very useful tool. A lot of people feel worse about having anxiety because they feel they don't have any control over it, mostly because it's not something that is usually tangible. Giving yourself a visual aid, even if it's only in your mind's eye can really help.
The same goes for stress at work affecting your home life. Stressful stuff going on at work? When you park your car in the driveway and turn off the ignition, before you get out the car, imagine taking your work stress and putting it in a box and sealing it up until you're back at work next. By all means talk with your partner about your stress, as long as you keep the conversation healthy. If they are able to listen, show your appreciation and show them that you're happy you're in their company. If they aren't able to listen, find another time that's more appropriate to talk or things just end up frustrating on both sides.
Loving Skizz's wisdom, and his willingness to challenge ideas and concepts that people hold themselves to. And having Impulse share his experiences alongside Skizz, the two of them just have such great energy. It's just so easy to sit here and listen to everything they have to say
I feel like I am on Team Skizz with this one 100%. I hardly get embarassed anymore. My lifestyle, my mannerisms, and how I look have contributed to me experiencing some extremely nasty people. What I have learned is that those people are always going to treat me that way regardless of what I do or say, so. Why should I bother with them? The only time I get embarassed anymore is when I do something that lets *myself* down. When I do something that I am not okay with having done to me is when I get truly embarassed. You guys gave some excellent food for thought with this one. Thank you.
As a 45 almost 46yo, I feel a lot along the line of Skizz. I learned along time ago to not give a crap what people think of me. If you like me cool, if you hate me, move along.
Imp
and Skizz, you guys are almost like the father figure I never had, I get so much advice and I feel so loved and seen when I watch these. I am a colossal people pleaser. I mean, I will literally sacrifice everything just to make someone happy. But, this episode has left me in tears because I feel like I can finally do something to help with my anxiety and accept who I am. Thank you❤
I left a job yesterday after 13 years to pursue a similar career but one that might make me happier one with less stress from horribly disorganized management screaming at you constantly. I'm terrified to start this new job because what if I'm not good enough and what if people don't think I can hack it. I'm a tool and die maker which is a trade skill. I think this is exactly the video I need to listen to I'm currently on my way to drop my tools off and I start on Monday and I've never been more terrified
You got this! They have confidence in you so they hired you, but on top of that, they won’t expect you to be perfect at everything in a new workplace from day one!
Allow yourself the space to be human, you don’t need to be perfect! Remember that they already have accepted you and you have so many years of experience, so trust in your own abilities, you wont let them down and it’ll only get easier with time!
@@SierraMysteriawow thank you so much honestly. After dropping my tools off where my stomach was in knots and I was ready to be sick I'm actually getting a little bit less nervous and finally getting a little bit more excited. I'm a pessimist and I'm a people pleaser and I'm full of self-doubt but the same time I know I'm good at what I do and I'm ready to be humble and wow people with my abilities. But seriously though your comment really truly brought tears to my eyes and I'm ready for Monday
You’ve got this! You are stronger and more capable than you think. Monday is going to be hard, Tuesday will be easier, and Wednesday easier still. A year from now you’ll look back and celebrate your decision. You’ve got this.
@@shaunacall4685 thank you so so much for the support. I'm scared but ready!
I start this podcast each week fully aware that i am going to learn something from you two. You both are so down to earth and real with each other and to us as well. Having a podcast that talks about these topics in the Hermitcraft community is so important. You have a wide range of ages that devour your content and take what you say to heart. I feel like most of your viewers are younger and having all of this amazing advise for the youngsters is so so so vital. Thank you for being so real and wholesome
The number of times I have heard Impulse say "I got hate from people for that" or "some people really didn't like that" and I'm thinking "yes, I saw that one comment too--and it was literally ONE. That is not 'people,' Impulse." 😂
Skizz, thank you for saying the things about your small list of people that you care about what they think of you. It meant a lot to me because in my life I’ve taken a similar approach. I’ve even had to remove my parents from that list. Which has been hard but necessary for my own health and my family’s happiness. Thank you
Skizz, I'm glad that you don't care what I think about you. I couldn't handle that kind of pressure.
For the rest of us (like Impulse), I try to remember that "hurting people" hurt people.
I genuinely don’t care what something thinks unless know them. That wasn’t always the case, but a short time on social media changed that. If some person I’ve never met and never will wants to judge, make assumptions, or think I’ll of me; have at it.
People in my life are there because there is mutual acceptance and respect. That’s what matters.
Skizz’s way of thinking is so foreign to me and how I was brought I up. it’s insanely fascinating getting a glimpse of how he sees the world. I’d hear advice from people like this all the time but giving his real life examples I feel finally pulls back the curtain to the “how” behind all that advice you’d normally hear or find when seeking for answers. Will definitely be rewatching this over and over again to soak it in.
I look forward to Fridays even more because of this podcast. Thanks for keeping this thing going. Congrats on a full hour!
I remember a while back Impulse saying that he reads comments, so I always leave him a comment because I think it's pretty damn cool that our opinions matter to him.
I am very much like Skizz, and my husband like Impulse. I have found that my ability to not care, makes him very uncomfortable when I do something that he feels like I should care what others think. I think that the answer is balance, once again! Love your podcasts!
WOW! Thank you for all the insightful things to contemplate. Skizz should be a life coach!
I also use the visualization strategy. If im feeling very stressed or frustrated, I take a deep breath and I imagine all my negative feelings being drawn into that breath as this dark cloud. Then I exhale and blow all that negativity away. It works very well for me.
From somebody who use to be in a business where reviews and word of mouth counted heavily. One thing to remember is there are a lot more people who will like something and never say it. It's just a thing we speak out when we don't like it, we just like to complain as a species so always take it with a grain of salt or however that goes.
The two of you are great people and should never change trying to please others. What you do helps people and risking that for a few haters isn't worth it. ❤
That is what is amazing about kids. Society has not changed them into caring what others think. It is society that has changed us to care what others think. There are situations where I can tap into that. When I do any public speaking, I do not care what others think about me, so I am not nervous.
From someone who is definitely struggling with a bunch of this stuff with low self esteem and caring what people care about her thanks for this podcast
Just what I needed
Skizz mentions "Forty-six and 2" and I had to go listen to it right then. Easily one of my favorite Tool songs.
I think I just drilled it into my mind that anyone who judges me like that is someone who I shouldn’t care about, because they don’t care about me. Once that was in my head, I stopped caring.
That thing that skizz does, I do that when I get nervous, especially if it turns into a nervous stomach. I will literally put my hand on my stomach, pull out with that same motion, and throw it away.
It's not embarrassing, Skizz, it's a way to reframe your thoughts or something
Scar said when he was on the podcast, own who you are, wise words. I struggle but I'm getting better.(I'm a "bit" of a weirdo, peeps don't like me) I imagine holding up a mirror to them when they are mocking me and how they wouldn't like it. The mirror has become a little like a shield now. I'm 53, and life is a journey.
IMPULSE: its tough, but try see yourself through our eyes:
You’re amazing, highly intelligent, really funny and an amazing content creator that inspired me to start my own channel.
I have literally watched every video you’ve made for years because you always seeking perfection and it shows in every video you create! It’s inspiring and don’t look at negative comments, there are millions of people that really really like you!
So stay strong and come back to this message when you need a pick me up. 💜💛
Besides the you have good health, love and good friends. There are strangers like me and my hubby that enjoy watching your content.
Keep it up and never leave YT!
@Skizz, you keep him here💙☺️
i really appreciate conversations like this as someone who lives in a constant state of anxiety lol, idk why there are days when confidence outweighs everything else and others where im just stuck overthinking
Such vulnerability.
I enjoy these conversations so much.
And also, impulse, even if i didn't its still worth doing!!!
Hi guys, I was given advice when I was much younger, and here it is "What other people think of you is none of your business" So let the few negative people of this world have their opinion and continue your' great work. :)
Hi Skizz & Impulse!
I just wanna thank you. You two have helped me a lot.
I had a bad burn-out last year due to HSP (disorder giving me more insight to the meaning of things and perspectives, but more difficulty with being socially active). I am now building my life up again and listening to you two always brings a smile to my face.
Impulse, you show a personality I relate to a lot, and the way you are able to express goofiness while being incredible responsible and caring is a goal I want to reach too. I don’t have a social life, but listening to the two of you makes me wanna thrive to be more social.
Skizz, I admire your ability to make everyone laugh and your confidence in caring about others. When I think of Skizz, I think of someone who you could always have a laugh with.
I thank the two of you for sharing your story, and for giving me confidence to pick my life back up again,
River
On the topic of content creation, what I think is important to consider when it comes to criticism, or in general negative comments, is that often times they won't come from what you expect it. When I started, I thought those comments wouldn't bother me because I don't care if someone calls me dumb, I don't care if someone doesn't like my content. What surprised me is that I do care about certain comments that I never thought about. For example, I got a comment saying "On that video you said X word, and that was cringe" and it confused me so much why would anyone, not only get triggered by a random word, but also have the need to comment about it. Thinking about it with myself, I realised that I can take mean comments, but I'm more sensitive when the comments feel unnecessary and disconnected from the content. Like talking about knives and someone complains about the colour of the curtains in the back.
Skizz, you're not crazy! Visualizing breathing out negativity is very similar to a breathing technique used in yoga, and I have used it successfully many times through painful health issues I've been dealing with. I love hearing that it has worked for you to deal with mental/emotional stress as well, so I'm going to give it a try next time I find myself in that kind of situation.
I feel like it's ok to care about what people think of you, but when it starts to inhibit who you want to be or it holds you back from doing something you truly love to do, that's when it becomes a problem.
This was a really good topic. As always, another very insightful and thought-provoking podcast. Thank you!
I had a hard day today and this is exactly what i needed to hear, I especially liked the taking the energy and physically getting rid of it because a few years back my piano teacher (who was studying psychology) taught me a similar tactic to help with my anxiety and i forgot about it after hearing what skizz said i remember and will try to remember. Man i love this podcast
Skizz, throwing away the ball of anxiety... I do that too! I keep calling it a ball of fear, but most of my fear is started by anxiety. It really does help in the moment to give you some time to deal with the situation more rationally
I was first introduced to skizzleman on the life series and thought he was absolutely hilarious. I then ended up subscribing to his channel and found him genuinely funny and interesting ever since. Thanks for the laughs skizz. 🙌🏾 I've been an impulse sub since HC6.
5 minutes in, gonna comment before I forget. Once when I was like 17ish I was coming home on the train. And it was like 1am and no one was on the train at the end of the line. And having a whole train to myself I decided to do a little musical number using the poles. It was great.
Had to comment this, sincerely hope you see it. I watched through the video and it was great. RUclips auto played to the next video which just so happened to be TangoTek 2 stream he uploaded today. So we go from your insightful thoughts to Tango immediately starting with “Anyway…” the timing was too perfect, genuinely laughed out loud. Love your guys content, thank you for continuing to share with us
I'm 60, and my best friend is 64; we used to always say that we would dance to a dial tone, and it's kinda true (we danced a LOT to Nine Inch Nails), but I'm married to a man who does NOT dance. So, yeah. I dance with my best friend (for 46 years). I'm sure your wife understands why you don't wanna dance, Skiz. We all do. :)
I listen to this podcast often, thank you soo much for sharing your thoughts about so many parts of life! It's nice to know that there are others in the world who share a lot of my ideals and life thoughts. Another thing I've discovered listening to you - I'm the same age as you, and I have no one around me to talk to about my gaming or inner thoughts. Thank you for sharing!
I may or may not have one Karaoke singing experience .
I got up on stage to sing “Take me Home Tonight” by Eddie Money.
Never again, realized very quickly that I sound good to only me. 😅
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31:17
That’s a given with anyone in entertainment; however, uno reverse applies here.
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AH HA!! Skizz does care… though he’ll miss the joke as he wasn’t present for that season. Imp?
Such a great podcast guys! I genuinely appreciate the work you guys put in to not only what we see with the finished product, but all the effort that goes unseen. ❤
I have always struggled with worrying about what people think of me, so thank you imp and skizz for this amazing episode ❤️❤️
I have been watching you guys for almost all of your podcasts and it is a very uplifting relaxing time for me. You cover great topics that get to the heart of the matter. Per this episode, people take advantage of the anonimity of the internet to attack others and many of them are pointing out things that they see in the mirror. They use it to point out what they think are other people's flaws to make them feel better about themselves. The internet can be a thief of the confidence in the presenter. Keep up the great work and best of luck
As a recovering people pleaser I'm with you impulse! Skizz when is your Ted talk coming out? Another podcast that reminds us all that we are all human! Also as an energy healer everything is energy so to actively focus on releasing and letting go of the negative energy that comes with the negative comments, situations in our life is hugely helpful. Perhaps not crazy skizz just naturally connected to how things make you feel. Thank You Both! Love your podcasts!
Worry comes from the possibility of loss. Of struggle or difficulty. You worry because we are taught that our actions can effect our relationships. We could lose or lose the respect of these people. There is no guide or slide rule of acceptability.
Great podcast, lots of valuable advice. Like Impulse, I’m a people pleaser and full of anxiety. It sucks, and I’m actively working on it. The book “Untamed: stop pleasing, start living” by Glennon Doyle was recently recommended to me. I haven’t started it yet, but wanted to mention it in case it helps others. Best of luck on your journey Impulse, great that Skizz is there to guide you.
I have nothing but admiration and appreciation for the both of you and the hermits!
As far as getting wrapped up in negative comments, assuming this is on an episode vs a VOD, I wonder if having a separation helps. And I mean like… those negative comments aren’t for YOU, they’re for Impulse. And I know it’s somewhat synonymous, but Impulse is a character. And that can act as a sort of buffer. Like in the Harry Potter realm of fandom, some people HATE Snape… LOATHE him. But that has no standing about Alan Rickmans acting or who he is as a person.
Just the ramblings of 23 year old nonsense, but I absolutely love all your work, the two of you
Not caring what people think on the extreme opposite can be just as bad, if not worse. That midframe will turn you into a self absorbed jerk.
But as skizz said it's not a matter of not caring about what people think it's a matter of being selective of who's opinion you listen to. I've always said, "the closer you are to me, the more your opinion matters." My wife can say things to me that will cut me to the core, because she matters most. But a random customer or guy on the street they don't phase me.
I married a people pleaser though so I fully understand the dynamics of your relationship. And just like I can have thick skin and let things roll off my shoulders.. my wife has an incredible knack for censoring me when I don't care enough to not speak my mind.
I actually went through this several years ago. A convention I went to around that time had a lip sync contest, and I was debating on entering. It took a lot for me to do it, but I got over myself and performed "Breaking the Law" by Judas Priest. While dressed as Joker from Persona 5.
Found your podcast some days ago, and I'm glad I did. Relaxed, humourous and goofy. Thanks.
Jan
Thank you, both of you. Along with this episode, every one of these podcasts is just about what I need to hear, especially as a hopeful very small content creator. Please let this podcast continue for many, many long years.
Hey skizz! Thought I should let you know that you’re not crazy! The whole “throwing away a ball of burning anxiety away” thing sounds like a variation of a breathing technique for overwhelming emotions, and so many people do something similar! It may not make sense to some people, but it can be really helpful for anxiety and I’m glad it works for you :)
Super late comment because I am behind in the podcast, but what Skizz was describing with the ball of tar-anxiety and throwing it out is something a therapist recommended to me years ago. It is a technique to imagine your anxieties or fears as an object that can leave your body and be tossed out or replaced with something that brings you calm. So not crazy at all!
Some talk about wearing many hats, we also have many facets of the soul.
Impulse is so relatable and Skizz is so inspiring. I really appreciate the dynamic
I loved this one!! My best friend and I are the exact same way where we’re on opposite ends of the coin with this. He cares very much about what others think of him and I care very little. I’m definitely going to send this podcast to him. Thanks for all the laughs and helpful advice
This is a really good (and relevant) topic for this week.
I’ve already done the journey of starting out more like Impulse and landing closer to Skizz’s take, and I’ll say understanding and feeling secure in yourself is a MUST, or life can get confusing. You gotta allow room for personal growth, but also don’t let others influence the moral code you live by - no one is a saint and someone else’s view might be just as skewed, they just might be more confident to declare it as fact.
Another thing is taking back control, as negativity from others or negative emotions can put you out of it. The only thing within your control is how you react outwardly, and there’s something to be said for fake it til you make it. If you act like you don’t care for long enough, you might eventually internalise some of that.
I will say, Skizz’s mindset may seem completely unattainable for many people relating more to Impulse, but progress to any degree is still progress 🤍
I am that way. I have never fit in anywhere so Im basically just myself alone. It's all good.
You can absolutely learn to let go of other peoples perceptions of you. But it takes either a lot of want to or a lot of pain that forces it. It’s hard work either way.
Omg! Dance like nobody is watching and sing like no one is listening, is something I've been telling my daughter since she was old enough to understand!
*Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional.* @58:48 I believe what Skizz is describing is a form of visualization. It is a legitimate method of emotional management and meditation. Common visualizations include grounding where you feel positivity coming up like water through roots or bubbling where you build your unwanted emotion or thoughts in your mouth and "blow" them into a bubble that you push away.
YES I was just about to write about this! Yes, this is strongly rooted in meditation, yoga, martial arts, and anything that discusses Chi. I learned: breathe in the good energy, breathe out the bad energy. It’s really helpful!