♿️10 REASONS YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH A WHEELCHAIR (Without asking)
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- Опубликовано: 25 авг 2024
- ♿️HEAR ARE 10 REASONS AS TO WHY YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH SOMEONES WHEELCHAIR OR MOBILITY AID WITHOUT ASKING... IF YOU ENJOYED THIS VIDEO CHECK THESE OUT NEXT.
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After suffering my spinal cord injury i have really had to adapt in life. So Im showing you my disability lifestyle to raise disability awareness. As a disabled woman and a woman in a wheelchair who is paralysed, I thought it would be interesting for you to see, and hopefully give you some inspiration and motivation so that you can live more independently. wether you are paraplegic or quadriplegic I hope that I can help you. The wheelsnoheels message is “so no one has to feel alone.”
I have lots of interesting disability videos, a lot of videos on how to cope with a disability and living life in a wheelchair, wether you are a girl boy woman or man. i have some paraplegic exercise videos, and advice. its important to keep your fitness levels up as much as possible as this can when physically and mentally with depression.
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•this video is just how I do it. there may be other ways which for for you. I cannot accept any responsibility for the actions you take after watching this video. You should always speak to a trained certified, medical professional first before undertaking any new activities.
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IF YOU MISSED IT, WATCH THIS FIRST: ruclips.net/video/nPZkPJAXDaQ/видео.html
IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO LEARN A LITTLE MORE WHEELCHAIR ETIQUETTE PLEASE CHECK THESE VIDEOS OUT: WHEELCHAIR PET PEEVES ruclips.net/video/ABQB2Zko23c/видео.html
STUPID THINS PEOPLE SAY ruclips.net/video/pa2-_uaoBrQ/видео.html
HOW TO PUSH A WHEELCHAIR ruclips.net/video/7kvsEfoGVpY/видео.html
HOW TO TALK TO A WHEELCHAIR USER ruclips.net/video/EIT822wWbho/видео.html
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Great fantastic I have double curvature of the spine . And many other things .
I swear just like shortly before the virus started some lady came out of the damn elevator and she just immediately leaned on my joystick controller with the fucking screen on it I was totally pissed off and used hand sanitizer... People are not going to be watching this who should be watching this if I were to put out a RUclips video and bitch about everything I could possibly ever want to the only people who would be watching would be the fucking people who probably wouldn’t do this kind of stupid shit in the first place
Can we push wife down hill???
You will walk soon.
Hello.
Just for the future, I think you meant "inanimate object" as in not alive, not "innate" as in a natural impulse or tendency.
We all all mess things up sometimes. I just wanted to let you know.
I've only been in a wheelchair for a little over a year now and some lady pushed me out of the way when I was grocery shopping. Her excuse was she was trying to shop! I yelled at her ”what do you think I'm doing?” and threatened to run her over. She ran away yelling sorry over her shoulder. So rude and disrespectful, I was livid!
I’m sorry but the run me over part made me laugh.
People aren't brave enough to fight back or cause a scene. Good on you!! I hope I will be brave like you when I get my first custom wheelchair in a couple months time.
Veda Couldn’t help but laugh at “threatened to run her over” 😂😂😂💀 Oh how many times that thought runs across my mind in public, never actually followed through with saying it though, at least not while I’m still around the person. I’d imagine it felt good to actually say it, and that woman definitely deserved it! I really don’t understand why it’s such a difficult concept for people to understand! Our wheelchairs are an extension of ourselves. I don’t touch you, you don’t touch me. Very simple. People are idiots lol 😂
@Brittany , I’ve always been outspoken. My parents raised me to stand up for myself. They have always said a disability doesn’t make us any less important so there’s no reason we should put up with disrespect anymore than anyone else. It can be scary at times but they also taught me how to defend myself against those who might try getting physically aggressive/violent so that helps.
@Sheree just remember you’re just as valuable as anyone else and deserve respect too.
*How a Serious Incident Occurred:*
I had someone in my friend group get turned and pushed so suddenly that their IV slid and the tubing *connected to their heart* was caught in the wheels. They screamed "STOP IT NO LET GO STOP STOP MY IV" and we turned around. We immediately realized they were no longer with us, unlike 60 seconds ago where we all agreed where to go. It was sudden.
We looked around. The closest person spotted them and saw the person pushing looked confused and slowed for a second, but was still pushing and wouldn't let go or stop. The spotter ran to their side grabbing the right wheel and asking the pusher what happened.
The wheel chair rider had tried to pull the tubing back, but it was twisted and they quickly started smashing their fingers desparately holding onto the wheels and afterwards they showed us their shoe that was ruined. They had tried to put feet down, but didn't have enough strength in them and lost balance
Their hands were bruised and cut, but we were able to wash some of the black marks from the wheels off of their hands. No one had brought bandages.
They weren't even going slow or in an aisle; it was a big open lobby. Someone just silently grabbed their wheelchair and started pushing them away from us.
In doing so, they could've just casually killed somebody.
People can be so stupid and self-centred
That's assault 😮
It’s so damn violating and terrifying when a stranger starts pushing you/ touching your chair. Strangers using you as a leaning post - there’s so many things. We are people sitting down. People. basic decency and respect is not too much to ask, yet it seems so hard to get.
"But I'm not even touching YOU, I'm touching your chair!" is how I know at least some people would answer that. Took me forever to get it through my parents' heads that my chair is part of me, so they can't rub their hands on the handles, or lean on it (I've ripped into my dad more than once for both of those), or rest a foot on the wheelie bar (ripped into that person, too - I forget who it was, maybe my dad again?), or hang something of theirs on it (my mom is very guilty of that - both of my grandmas used a wheelchair for their last 3-5 years of life, so my mom would hang her stuff on the back when she was pushing them, and eventually I told her that that was super rude unless she got their permission first), or move me, without my express permission.
The reinactments were a marvel. Good acting on all parts. Well done team.
Oh my goodness yes you nailed so many great valid points. Also another one of my pet peeves and I have a brother in law that notoriously used to do this to me is he would put his dirty disgusting shoes on my wheelchair and use me as his personal foot rest. I constantly would tell him its not appropriate but he continued to do it so one time while he fell asleep I untied both his shoes, then tied them together with a triple knot and shoved his feet to the ground. 🤣
Lura Hanschu I freakin hate that when people consider me a foot stool or kick my spokes. Like, don’t jack up my spokes, wheels are expensive.
Yep I hate that too. I love that response tho!!! Hope he didn’t do it again
Wheelsnoheels - Gem Hubbard Unfortunately my brother in law is a typical guy and he did try it a couple more times. I finally got to the point to where if I noticed he was getting ready to try it I would pull forward and his feet would fall. One time I did it though my whole family was in the room and they all started ganging up on me. So I then turned around and lifted both my legs up and put them on top of my brother in law. Then asked my family if that was ok for them. You could hear a pin drop it was so quiet. Lol
@@22Lura What's a "typical guy"? Stereotyping a whole group does nobody any good.
Even when I ask a friend to push me up a ramp or something if they go slightly faster or further than I wanted it's scary! I hate it when strangers just come up to me and push me around, especially when I'm out on my own as I tend to wear headphones so I can't hear them or know they are behind me till they just start pushing me. I've actually been tipped out of my chair and dislocated a hip (EDS life) by a stranger 'trying to help', abled's really don't get it
Thank you for this video. This has been and is honestly such a big issue for me because so many people don’t get it. Even now my kids are adults they will still come visit me and stand there fiddling with my chair, like pulling the joystick off and on over and over while they talk to me or learn so hard on the head rest that I can see it bending. They think I’m just being petty when I beg them to leave my chair alone.
Also I have both ptsd and sensory issues and I wish people understood that leaning on the back of my chair or touching it while I’m sitting in it does feel every bit as distressing and violating as walking up and putting your hands on my actual body without permission or warning and leaves me sitting there trying to pretend everything is fine while having an anxiety attack or flashbacks.
Mind you, I have had people think it’s fine, just because I’m disabled, to come up and hug me or pat me or whatever because they see disabled people in the same way they see children (although to be honest it’s a problem that people don’t give children the right to say not to hugs and stuff too) so I guess it’s no surprise that they don’t see why touching my chair isn’t ok!
Someone actually grabbed the controller on my powerchair last year. I couldn't believe it!
Same
I have been in a wheelchair for over 3 years and have found nothing but respect for me. No one has ever pushed my wheelchair unless asking me first. The only time I had a problem was in a crowded family setting where someone made a point to let me know I was in the way of everyone. I could not find a place to be and was pretty humiliated. It would have been nice if the person had asked others to allow me to get through to where I was going. Instead I sat and waited for someone to move.
Know this is a serious issue but your husband is such a good sport for helping show all of this.
I've had so many people startle me so badly so many times over the years that I almost instinctively physically lash out.
It doesn't help my PTSD, which is where a big part of the reaction of physically lashing out comes from.
Don't touch my wheelchair or my service (assistance) dog.
I would do this too. But I've had self defence training before I had diagnosis of EDS
I don’t understand in what universe people think this behavior is acceptable. It seems like common sense to me not too do either
I love that at the end of half the reenactments, Sean (Shaun? I know both are common spellings) runs away comedically after the incident occurs.
Hahaha. It’s grate at slap stick!! It’s Shaun 😉
@@Wheelsnoheels Thank you! I'll remember that for next time! ^_^
I have a power wheelchair and I'm a teacher. My students..and other people...love to come up and start playing with the control stick. Which, of course, moves me around. A lot of the same "don'ts" apply to power chairs as well. THANK YOU!!
I have ordered a power wheelchair, so I'm looking forward to having people do stupid things around me. I suppose you could cultivate the habit of turning it off when you are stopped, but I don't know how practical that is.
I don’t have push handles. So they push in my back...that hurts. I do love the social distancing here in the Netherlands. No more stepping over my legs when I am in my wheelchair! I really hated that! But still people do get to close.
Over the years I've had a lot of experience of this. I've even had people leaning on the back of my wheelchair whilst talking to SOMEONE ELSE, not me! It's bad enough when a person leans on the back of my chair whilst talking to me, but when they've done it whilst holding a conversation with another person, who I happen to be with at the time, might I add, it's far worse! You also made an excellent point when you said "We can feel it (when someone so much as touches the chair) and it's BLOODY ANNOYING!" Because it IS BLOODY ANNOYING!! STOP IT!!! LOL
Back when I needed someone to push me, my dad had a bad habit of rubbing his hands on the handles when we were standing still, and I yelled at him more than once to knock it off (he scratched up my car's steering wheel the same way (his wedding ring dug in), and to this day (it's been 5 1/2 years, I'll note) it still makes me mad because I feel it every time I drive). There was once or twice where I also caught him leaning on it, and I had no shame in yelling at him to "Get off!" At one point (I forget when, who, and where, I just know it was between July '18 and Christmas '19 because I know which chair I had when it happened), I caught someone who was behind me with their foot up on my wheelie bar - yeah, I ripped into that person, too.
Great video! I also want to add the amount of times my skirt/dress/bag straps/scarf has gotten suddenly caught in the wheels. It rips, which makes me sad cause it might be a favourite item, and also I don't have much energy to do shopping or mending. But it might also hurt, especially a scarf can make it dangerous... :/
I had someone in the friend group get turned and pushed so suddenly that their IV slid and the tubing connected to their heart was caught in the wheels. They screamed "STOP IT NO LET GO STOP STOP MY IV" and we turned around. We immediately realized they were no longer with us, unlike 60 seconds ago where we all agreed where to go.
We looked around. The closest person spotted and The person pushing looked confused and slowed for a second, but was still pushing and wouldn't let go or stop. The person that saw her ran to their side grabbing the right wheel and asking the pusher what happened.
During the inciddnt,
the wheel chair rider tried to pull the tubing, but it was twisted and they quickly started smashing their fingers desparately holding onto the wheels and afterwards they showed us their shoe that was ruined. They had tried to put feet down, but didn't have enough strength/movement in them and just lost balance and destroyed one shoe.
Their hands were bruised and cut, but we were able to wash some of the black marks from the wheels off of their hands.
They weren't even going slow or in an aisle- it was a big open lobby. Sonehow soneone just silently grabbed their wheelchair and started pushing them away from us.
Also, Gem, I speak for myself but I'm sure others can agree we love to see your family and your videos, your husband and daughter are the picture of what a support system needs to look like people that are there with with you and really support you in every way that makes life easier, it may not sound like much but sometimes just having the emotional support of those family members gives us the motivation to Goes through the next day or make through the next task without saying I'm just gonna give up and camp out on the couch I love seeing your videos because you make me laugh you'll make me tear up from sweet moments and you are genuinely a very bright person that I've even learned some things from and I've spent my whole life around someone with mobility aids and I have been using them for about 10 years now so thank you for all of your content it is absolutely delightful.. You are a world treasure my dworld treasure my dear thank you so much
I know this is an older post, however when I found it, I had to vent.
I wasn't with my boyfriend when this happened to him, and well I wasn't becaise I would have been arrested. He had an amputation earlier in the year, and was still wearing a rook (that protects the healing residual limb) . So he was in a pizza buffet restaurant ( yes ,open after lockdowns were lifted a bit), and he was at the counter to pick out his slices and some [redacted] woman walked up behind him and pushed him away from the counter !!!
He yelled, his son yelled - the woman's male companian yelled from where he was sitting- and the restaurant worker practically jumped the counter to render aid.
I still get angry just thinking about it!
I can't believe, every day I see thoughtless, self centered [redacted]s treat others this way.
People need to - they need Jesus... seriously.
This is incredible. I hope this gets shared far and wide and real change comes from it. I have added a sign to the back of my chair to tell people to keep distance from me in these times
I’m thinking about a sign too. Please feel free to share and help spread this video 😊
@@Wheelsnoheels Like a roadsign with a hand about to touch a push handle and a line through it? Or maybe a simple "Do Not Touch Me Or My Wheelchair Without Asking"
This video is so spot on! For me it’s a balance and pain thing if someone suddenly grabs my wheelchair so it jolts or even has vibration going through it from someone bumping into my chair. And pandemic or not, just keep distance! It can hurt like heck if my footrest hits your Achilles’ tendon area just because YOU are walking right in front of my chair and suddenly stop, and it’s even more so if I’m using my Smart Drive at the time instead of pushing myself. Never ever walk right in front of a wheelchair! Walk next to us or behind, for both your own safety and the safety of the person in the wheelchair
For those walking behind us, keep watching for sudden stopping. We're as liable as non-disabled people to do it.
PageMonster That too! But keeping some distance to us and being aware of your surroundings gets you a long way if walking near a wheelchair. A wheelchair may have to do a sudden stop or turn to maneuver around an obstacle (like stop and do a wheelie over something, or change direction for a moment to avoid a stick or pothole or something) but it’s still safer to walk next to or behind a wheelchair, than walking right in front of one. I often have to remind my own mum to NOT walk in front of me, yet she does it all the time...
@@ReyOfLight People should treat walking the same as driving. Leave room for sudden manoeuvres.
PageMonster Yup! But all too often people just walk out right in front of a wheelchair as if we don’t exist, and if I have to make a sudden break to not hit someone’s Achilles’ tendon or toes, it can hurt my neck pretty badly because of how sensitive I am to sudden stops and jolts
Both of my cats love to dash in front of me when I am going through a doorway. They are the worst about this lol. They like to live on the edge.
I have a good friend with spina bifida and has been in a wheelchair almost full time as long as I have known her and everytime I put her wheelchair in my car I ask her how to properly fold her chair or to place in the car as to not break it. Also, I never touch her chair without her permission because I know it’s part of her
I have had friends/colleague in wheelchairs. I have NEVER touched them or their chairs without permission.
This is so well-phrased, thank you!
That really, REALLY needed saying!
Even when I’m with my Mom who uses a walker, I only help when she asks. I might hold a door open but I’ll ask before actually trying to help someone because they probably have it, and if they don’t, me asking usually gets a smile and a thank you!
Today I really understand why never touch someone's chair. I was choosing my first chair today and I was always so nervous and scared when the seller touched the chair while I was sitting in it. And he always said he will do it.
I think part of it is that, even if they tell us they're going to touch it, there's always a chance that they might do something we aren't expecting - I 100% felt this last Christmas break when I had someone push me for the first time since getting my current chair (first chair I've had where I don't have to rely on anyone to push me anywhere, so I'm finally 100% independent with it, so it had been quite a while since anyone had pushed me), and I never knew quite which way my mom was going to push me or when she was going to speed up or slow down or how quickly (we were on a road trip and we didn't have time to pull my SmartDrive out of the jampacked back seat because we were just going in and out of one place because we were a bit short on time, so she had to push me).
@@SnowySpiritRuby That is true. For me it is usually my boyfriend who is pushing me and he almost always does crazy stuff. It is part of fun we have together, that is fine. But he almost never tell me he will let go so I almost sent myself in the road off the curb as I though it is part of his fun (to go to the side of the sidewalk). It is weird. Most of the time I feel he is pushing me (sometimes he pushes me by my shoulders), but sometimes, I do not.
As an able bodied person, currently since things can always change, I was always taught to ask, even if it looks like you are struggling, say in the store grabbing something from the shelf, do not just assume. It is always better to ask "Anything I can help you with, or how can I assist you" and being told "NO" than to be in the situation that something terrible does happen. I also work in a medical imaging so when we do have pt with mobility aides, I make sure to ask when they can/ comfortable with and how to properly assist them since every one is different.
Thanks. Please advise anyone you know to act accordingly.
What annoys me is that a lot of this stuff would be considered assault if it was done to a non-disabled person, so why do we as disabled people have to just grin and bear it? I laughed when you said you'd generally ask someone if you can move their property because I've been in that situation. I was at a podiatry appointment and mum was in the room. The podiatrist asked mum if she could move her handbag out of the way, then she decided to move my chair with the brakes on without even saying anything like she owned it. It happens, people!
It happens because we are not seen as equal citizens by some.
PageMonster so true 🤗
Exactly! And it should be considered assault. Because they are literally pushing you. It doesn't make it better just because you happen to have wheels. These things are literally assault and should be treated as such.
As someone who doesn't use any mobility aids, I am appalled at what people think is okay. I also want to say that being angry and annoyed is completely valid and natural. Your experience is heard and all of us here support you.
@@ChrisPage68 Or they can't get their head around the fact that our mobility aids are a part of us, and so they see them as totally separate, whether we're in/using them or not.
totally ignorant and disrespectful to touch someone’s mobility device without there permission. These people that do this type of behavior like pushing a disabled person out of the way should be charged with assault. People with disabilities deserve the same level of respect as able bodied people
I borrowed a chair while at disney (I'm an ambulatory user) my mum started pushing me even though I said no, she nearly ran someone over!!! I had a mini frickin heart attack.
Agh! I hate when that happens! Back when I needed someone to push me, my mom would insist on going right down the middle of the path/trail because it "felt safer" to her, while I was very cognizant of the fact that I needed to be over to one side to let people either go around us or pass us the going other way. After no less than 7 bikes and electric scooters whizzed past us with zero warning, freaking both of us out every time, in the space of less than 5 minutes, she finally semi conceded and went a little closer to the side. I've been trying to hammer into her head for over 3 years now (ever since I started having to use a chair part time) that I don't care what she thinks "feels safer", she has to push me where I want to be. When I got my current chair, I purposely got a seat belt for it because there were times when my parents had nearly thrown me out of my chair because they weren't paying attention to the ground.
Notice for non-wheelchair users: if we (wheelchair users) need help, we'll ask; if you'd like us to move, ask. Basically, use your words, and we'll use ours.
I’m autistic and therefore spend a lot of time in the disability department at my school I go to (year 11 secondary student if you want to know) and there is a completely blind boy in the department and there was also an adhd and autistic (more severe than me) boy and one day he took the blind boys cane when he was hyper and not thinking straight, of course this worried the blind boy (who is also autistic) and of course the sighted boy didn’t get told off (he couldn’t control himself) but he obviously was told not to do it again... but just don’t take peoples canes, walking sticks or weelchairs without asking! People who are physically disabled need these things
I've had 'normal' people insist about six times that they should put my Elec Razor (I use as mobility scooter) in their car and drive me home from the shop TWO Houses away! WTF! I was on the verge of asking the store manager to call the police.
@@TheMazinoz did they touch you? We’re they just offering, tryna be helpful I suppose.
People are generally not trying to be creepy but I can imagine that you declined, I’m sure it’s not that hard to go two houses.
@@tobeytransport2802 No, if they had touched me or scooter I would have gone to staff for help at least getting out of store safely. What bothered me was
1 I used it for mobility and enjoy riding it as well
2 I did not ask them to help
3 I explained I lived nearby and it would be ridiculous to drive that distance. I have a car myself and did not drive there for that reason. As well I used scooter with a backpack as a small manageable trolley. Backpack better for carrying groceries due to joint issues.
4 Supermarket staff don't object as I don't ride it on their grounds.
5 A few other seniors have also started using them for work, shopping.
6 I enjoy it
7 But their insistence like SIX times really made me suspicious in the end of their motives, ie theft.
Also service dog can be a mobile device.
A hunk of flesh was ripped from my thumb when I pushing my chair and someone came along and pushed my chair
Omg😖😖
Such a great video! I had an issue in autumn of 2019 where a girl at my university started stalking and harassing me constantly, the school did nothingto help me and didn'tget why things like her touching and trying to push my wheelchair (which was a power chair so pushing = not moving or being tippedout of the chair) was an issue. I'm genuinelythinking about emailing this video to the university's offices that so terribly mismanaged the situation.
Eliza Joyner you should. Maybe they will get educated.
You need to inform them you're going to be contacting the ada on them not protecting you.
Plus the next time she does it immediately call 911 on her. At the very least you'll start putting together a paper trail on her harassing of you. Document everything! Times, dates, places, wether teachers/staff helped or not. There's no such thing as too much information. You might also check with legal aid on what it requires to get a restraining order against her.
If that fails then ram her ass!
There's no reason to put up with this. Take higher up if you have to & if needed contact the press, post on social media. Anything that will get others pissed off at the University themselves for not helping you.
Hopefully though it's been long enough you won't have a problem anymore.
@@Nirrrina This is a good comment except for the first line. It drives me absolutely crazy when people say this "You need to inform them you're going to be contacting the ada on them". The Americans with Disabilities Act is a law, not an office. You can sue under the law, but there is no "ADA" to contact. There is no one office that administers all of the requirements of the law.
I use a stick if I'm going to be walking and standing for long periods of time, because standing is just as painful as walking. I walked around an outdoor/indoor farm once where it was open to the public. The number of times children in particular just walked in front of me and didn't even notice my stick. I had to stop short of hitting them by accident. So sometimes not noticing you have mobility aids is just as bad.
I’ve been a wheeler for 35+ yrs… I wished this video had a billion views!
I agree I agree so many people move your wheelchair while you are in it because you are in their way 😡😡
One person tried to do that to me (I just looked, and it was actually exactly 2 years ago today), and I immediately grabbed my wheels and very sternly, in front of about 15 of my relatives (another of whom was in a chair but she had another relative pushing her), told her that I could do it myself. My sister, however, barely kept from screaming at ME, as if *I* was the one who had done something wrong and not our tour guide. All it would have taken was the person asking me to please move (which I actually couldn't really do anyway, because there wasn't room - that was back in the day when I was stuck using a standard manual that was way too big for me and the footrests stuck way out in front; I've got a custom one now with a significantly smaller turning radius than that first one); instead, she grabbed my chair without warning (she was behind me the entire time, so I didn't even see her do it) and started pushing me over. I ended up reporting the incident to management, mentioning said person by name and how what she did was the equivalent of grabbing me by the shoulders and shoving me out of the way, and management assured me that they would be doing more training with their tour guides to avoid that happening again in the future. I think that's the only time that exact sort of thing has happened to me, someone randomly starting to push me without warning or permission (though back when I needed someone to push me, my parents would often try to start pushing before I was ready, and I would grab the wheels to make them stop, and they'd get mad at me for it - they're a lot better about it now, but it still feels weird to have someone push me, in general, even when they're doing it by request, probably just because I'm used to always doing it myself), but I usually either put on my brakes or hold my wheels when stopped (such as in the grocery store, at a museum, etc.) because I've discovered that otherwise I will sometimes start rolling if I don't.
I agree with everything you said here.
I’ve been using crutches for 4 years , when I last used a wheelchair some random bloke in a shop tried to walk out the shop with me , I literally had to scream help me stop him and shop assistants ran over as we got near the door . It put me off using a chair in public for a long long time
I have a lady friend who while I was working in a charity shop and thankfully she told me right from the off how disrespected felt she when people touched her wheelchair without asking .
Excellent Gem, needs to be shown as a public information film on the telly !
I felt like a nodding dog watching this. I have lost so many layers of skin and nails through people thinking they are helping. Also, I am quite slow on uneven ground and I have very impatient friends and family so they push me and say "you need to practice" how am I suppose to practice when people push me every time! (Just been measured for brand new chair complete with battery boosted wheels can't wait!)
When I was first in wheelchair I went to the store with my mom and she was having me learn to use the doors and someone went to help me . My mother stopped them telling them that I needed to learn how to do it on my own. That someone wasn't going to be there every time I needed help.
The tapping of a wheelchair infuriates me, i explained it to someone as someone constantly tapping you, however due to hypersensitive to me it like a hard poke, I don’t think some people realise what impact they could be having.
I have had a couple of times when people pushed me without me knowing and my fingers have got caught my spokes
Ugh it’s horrible isn’t it?? And I sometimes get crushed between shopping carts
@@Wheelsnoheels i have people hit me with the shopping trolleys in my back and I have got a bad back as it
@@Wheelsnoheels I've had knees in my back when people have tried to help me get up steps WITH my consent. I have a nerve on the surface of my spinal scar in my lumbar region that's like getting an electric shock when it's touched.
Even when you WANT help, it can often be dangerous because Normies don't always listen first before "helping".
Kirsty Calder me too, it hurts like buggery doesn’t it
6:33 I’m a year 11 (last year of secondary) autistic student, I’m not in a wheelchair and I don’t have any physical disabilities but it can drive me insane when someone taps my chair in class at school with there foot, most people will just be like ‘oh that’s anoying’ but I’m thinking Uarghhh!
This infuriates many people. They just try to hold it in and not make a scene or be violent. It's a big pet peeve really gets to, probably, the majority of people.
It comes up in a ton of movies and comedy sketches.
@@hotaru8309 I don’t let it get to me where I can help it
Me, too!! It has always driven me absolutely insane, ever since I was little, and I'm an autistic who's now several years past college. I usually end up either disconnecting my chair from the one(s) next to it (if the person is tapping a different chair), or scoot mine forward a little bit every time the person taps it/I feel their foot on it (and continue scooting it further and further forward each time, if I have room - if I don't have room, I move it just enough each time that their foot falls off/can't reach) - I find, generally, that the person eventually gets the message and stops; if they still don't after 4-5 times, though, I reach back and swat at their foot/leg with my hand while still facing forward (if it's someone I know decently well - it usually happened most often during choir rehearsal when I was unable to stand with everyone else - I try to avoid actually making contact with my hand), but that's my second-to-last resort. I rarely ever get to the point of having to actually tell them to stop kicking/tapping it, which is personally my last resort.
A pub/ restaurant tried to put my crutches in the garden, they’re over £100 smart crutches (which I needed for the whole walking thing) the only people allowed to touch my mobility aids are my friend and boyfriend and only because they don’t mess about with them
Thankfully most of these rarely happen to me in a powered wheelchair. I have however heard of people knocking peoples joy stick or actually taking hold of joystick to move them out way. Moving a powerchair takes skill and it is VERY dangerous if don't know what you're doing.
I had a carer grab my house power chair and drag it across the floor. 🤦🏻♀️
Sarah kind of makes you wish they would run over their foot with it. They probably won’t make that mistake twice. Lol
People have done that to me.
The info in the video is important, but having you and your family act it out is so funny and really makes me want to watch it! Keep up the great work! Love the videos
Just found you and subscribed straight away (maybe slightly biased by the boxer) I am an electric wheelchair user and so many of these things apply to me as well! Sharing this with other wheelchair users ASAP!
Absolutely loveee your re-enactments 🥰 they are all sooo true
All the able-bodied equivalent skits with Shaun picking up your daughter and her reactions made me laugh so hard!
But seriously people, stop touching strangers.
Especially botherede during COVID when people behind me in line stood right behind me. I'm not in WC
I find them really useful the comparison
Hi, I just discovered your videos and they are quite usefull and you turn it as a funny thing.
One of the most on this particular video is how you speak about hands and fingers :)
I so see myself when you speak about it, I recently had someone pushing me with me telling him not to, I tried to stop.... my finger got caught in a ray aaaaaaaaaaaaaand good by left pinky.
True story, I now have only 4 fingers on left hands.
So to speak, as you say : NEVER PUSH US WHEN WE DON'T WANT
The fact that people do this makes me really nervous. With how things are going I will probably need a mobility aid. But I've had a problem with people picking me up to move me without a mobility aid just because they just wanted me somewhere else or I was in the way, same with my bag and stuff I own. A common one would be the chair I was sitting just get picked up with me in it and carried to a new spot. It really freaked me out. So the thought of being moved in something with less control really scares me. I don't know how anyone can think behaving like that is ok its really violating.
Im a power chair user (ambulatory). The worst thing anyone has done so far was actually my husband......we were boarding a train and he just grabbed my handles and shoved me and the chair on, like we flew......he was most upset when he got ripped up one side and down the other once Id actually orientated myself, repositioned myself and the chair to not be an obstruction because he hadnt actually planned where I was going (it is very helpful to take a few seconds to work out where youre aiming for when repositioning takes micro control in a moving train).......I kinda just hoped that all the other people in the train would also learn the lesson that I was hoping to teach my hubby. He is wonderful and without him I couldnt go anywhere......but I WILL do damage if he ever grabs those handles without asking again.
Very well done video. I am so sorry people are so rude. And a wheelchair person could have ostomy or two (as me a non wheelchair person does have one) and there is a lot of damage and frustration a person could do if they don’t know what the heck they are doing around an ostomy. I wish you well during this pandemic.
You should never touch a person's whèelchair (unless if they were about to roll off of a steep cliff) not only for safety reasons but I pisses the person off. I have that happen to me when i'm using my chair last weekend when someone ran their shopping cart into the back of my chair on purpose, so I backed in to her cart just to free my back wheel, and she got mad at me, I looked at her and said too bad.
I think that 'not unless I ask you to' is a better solution. My record for being asked if I need help is 72 times in one hour. By that point I was getting a little annoyed.
I'm planning to get a little sign that snaps over the back bar of my chair that says "If I need help, I'll ask. Thanks." I think my record is 6 times in 5 minutes, but that only happened once (and thankfully it stopped as soon as I told one of them that I would let them know if I needed any help - literally all I was doing was looking around, and everything I was looking at was within my reach) - I rarely get asked these days (though a couple months ago, one employee at a place I had never been I could have sworn was following me around and asked me if I needed help probably 3 or 4 times over the hour or so that I was there - I resorted to avoiding her, I was so annoyed).
I'm surprised that the shop you filmed this in didn't call the police on all of the things shaun did to you. lol
hahaha, Im sure we will be bannd soon ;)
My Dad asks me to push him quite frequently and I offer sometimes when he looks tired and he usually accepts. I met a friend of a friend who was in a wheelchair at an event. We went to get a curry and he was struggling up a slope. I said "do you want a hand?" He said "No, how dare you ask that". I said, "I do it when my Dad needs a hand". His response was "He's the sort of person that gives disabled people a bad name". I brushed off his response and said "If I don't ask, I don't know" and we carried on. I understand his point of view and how important independence is, but his response stung a bit. Conversations surrounding people's boundaries are important and must be had, but they can be difficult sometimes.
As a indepent wheelchair user who doesnt att all like to be pushed, but occasionally still need it, you did not do anything wrong.
Accepting help is difficult,it can feel embarrasing and some people may owerreact becauce of that.
Many able-bodied people see wheelchairs as a prison whereas those of us that use them actually see them as a means of more freedom. A wheelchair or other mobility aids become an extended part of us. You wouldn't go and grab a stranger physically and move them out of the way, neither should you ever touch someone's mobility equipment. The same goes for Service dogs for the blind etc. Don't touch without consent, and that also goes towards our extended parts, in the form of mobility elements. A wheelchair is not that much different from a prosthetic leg or arm when it comes to the purpose, helping us do something we otherwise couldn't do, and a person wouldn't go about grabbing someone's prosthetic arm and moving them or pulling at that, so it baffles me why some people think it is okay to do the same with a wheelchair, etc.
I know there will always be ableist arses out there who do things like this on purpose, but I just can't understand why people who do this with ignorance towards how not okay it is, can't see how it's so so wrong. This video was amazing, thank you!
I hope this comes across alright...
Loving the reenactments, examples of what it might look like in each clip. Flailing arms abundance 😂 There's just something funny about your dramatic take on it!
When a friend kept resting his hand on my wheelchair and I told him not to after pursuing it and continuing to tough it I lost my temper and slapped his hand. He was so offended and insisted I assaulted him. I refused to apologize and my professor backed me up. I’ve also had a woman “kidnaped” my wheelchair when I was transferring out of my car. She took the frame and was trying to help after I told her I did t need help like five times. I turned arround with one of my wheels and she had gotten distracted by a friend who drove by and had walked away with my chair frame it was annoying as I was in a rush and only accepted her help because she wouldn’t take no for an answer. That was an interesting one and there was that time a woman assaulted me with my own cane when I didn’t immediately vacate the handicap seat on the train. This was before I was in a wheelchair full time and had slightly more mobility but couldn’t use the regular seats as getting out and into them was challenging. I’ve got other stories I don’t remember at the top of my head 🌊lol🌊.
Why on earth do people want to take our mobility equipment away from us?? It defies all logic!
@@TheMazinoz they see things that can be held as potential weapons, not as extensions of the body.......
@@heatherrowles9930 I had one woman repeatedly insist I should put my mobility scooter [2 wheel elec scooter] in her car and drive me to my home. Like wtf did she think I used it for - decoration. Also suspected she was trying to steal it as she was so insistent.
@@heatherrowles9930 Perhaps we need to start using them as such as well then.
I have been in a wheelchair full time now for 8 years and what you have said is spot on. Also as you have said the cost is outrageous. My manual wheelchair was$4700.00 US and my electric chair was $27,500.00 US. I can’t afford to replace them and insurance takes forever on repairs or replacement.
Thank you for this post. I hate when people touch my chair.
I punched a door trying to get through...my hand was blue and I had floating cartilage for almost 6months.
Amusingly my wheelchair HAS to be lifted by the wheels... If you try to lift it by arm rests they just fall out and my chair falls to the ground...had a few taxi drivers not listen to me when I'm telling them...
Gem Thank you so much, I think I’ve had most of those situations. Thank you so much for highlighting what we have to deal with, I hope plenty of people watch this and spread the word (I will be sharing these last few videos for sure 😉) just be kind people 🤗 sending huge virtual hugs 🤗🦽🤗🦿🤗
I wish you all the best in your life😊
It’s the same as being blind and vision
Another slant on this....when you're in your wheelchair it's like it's a part of you (partly because it replaces the ability your legs for locomotion), so it really does feel like assault or kidnap if someone touches it or moves you without your permission.
my ex once pushed my wheelchair without telling me when i was waiting for him at a crowded mall and did not tell me it was him until he whisked me away from our meeting spot. nearly broke up with him on the spot for it until he realized how hard he screwed up. i was pissed all week.
Similar experience to being car jacked I'd imagine.
Unfortunately for some reason people think when I’m pushing around and controlling myself down a slope people think I can use my brakes to just stop or that I can just stop when pushing particularly my family don’t seem to understand tried to explain they want to think when they very rarely push me that they can use my brakes have an active user chair and very independent yesterday I had a new experience where I was asked to stop so they could put something in the bag on the back of my chair which would have been fine but it was a path with not much space around it if people wanted to get past so my plan was to go to where the path was wider and safer but instead she grabbed my push handles it felt like she tipped me back I was so glad I had my anti tippers on otherwise it could’ve ended a lot worse unfortunately we know people can react in all sorts of weird ways around a chair so frustrating as well people have no clue
Thank you for putting this together!!!!!!
I didn't understand this until I started using a walker myself. Now I get terrified when people try to "help" me by moving it!
I've just started using one, but so far no issues. It never occurred to me people would move it. I haven't used a bus ramp yet, but one person just helped steady it when getting off bus. Another wanted to know where I bought it and we discussed features as he wanted something like it for his mother in law.
@@TheMazinoz Ironically, I've had the biggest issue with Physical therapists. They try to correct The direction of my walker, as I'm walking. Now that I am in a power wheelchair, I have had physical therapists try to drive it for me ( If they think I am going the wrong direction, or assume I need help without even asking) I have even had someone turn it off while I am still trying to drive.
@@tbonegddss I've given up on physios as even ones who claim knowledge of EDS just repeatedly hurt me and no benefit, and I'm paying them to ignore my pain. X3. Now figure things out and do pain relief like hot water bottles IR lamp etc and appropriate exercises for problematic muscles from you tube physios and have had better cheaper quicker results. Let's just say after 46 yrs I've given up on supposed med professionals for help and way past that for the various intolerable ignorant insults from them.
@@TheMazinoz I am at that point right now regarding giving up on doctors etc. I have MS and my doctors and PT seem to be giving up on me, and I'm not ready to give up on myself, so I am looking to what I can do on my own.
I also have the spinal cord injury like you and having fractures in my both hands and also having a disk on my neck because of dangerous accident
I hate people leaning on my chair, I am not a leaning post 😡. Strangers just randomly lean on my power chair
Why wheelchair costs more than my first 8 cars combined! It is amazing how many of these things happen all the time! Sometimes these things make me not want to go out again for weeks sometimes months at a time!
Great video. Thank you for sharing and helping to educate people.
When my family lean on my chair or tap my chair it’s soooo annoying. I’m autistic and hypersensitive so that shit really irritates me.
I am, too, so I hear you! My dad used to lean on it, and rub his hands on the handles (he scratched up my car's steering wheel the same way - I'm still mad at him for it, even though it's been 5 1/2 years, because I can still feel the scratch marks every time I drive and it drives me nuts) - drove me crazy!! I distinctly remember yelling at him to get off at least once (leaning), and knock it off at least a couple times (rubbing his hands). They don't realize that we can feel everything - they think if they're not touching something that's directly touching us (cushion, backrest, armrests/laterals/etc. if any), we can't possibly feel whatever they're doing. I've never tolerated anyone putting their feet on my chair (regular chair or wheel - someone actually tried to put their feet on the back of my wheelchair once, I think the wheelie bars) or kicking/tapping the bench/row of chairs (if they're all connected) - same reason, and I have no shame in telling them (either by word or action) to stop if they do.
I hope all the actors and stunt doubles are paid well! The cute stunt double lady she did hurt herself the poor lady I feel bad for her!
Dearest Gem 💎, thanks for sharing this 👍🏻! Some abled bodied people are rude. They might not know better, but I cannot understand how people can be so threatening, disrespectful. We could get hurt so bad. Again, thanks for sharing 🥰😍😘
I use a cane and lots of times my friends just take it pretending its a sword or something. One of them just cant understand i need some space because hey i have a cane and always ends up kicking it or something sending me down for a not so nice hug with the cement.
Lina MiniatureMoon you need better friends, they sound terrible.
@@punky19761 they are tbh
Children always ask ...why.
Small children ask why I'm using the in-store mobility scooter.
Love your top where did you get it?
And when someone is going through a doorway don't go grabbing the door. Ask if we'd like the door to be held. I had someone do that to me and it wrenched my shoulder real bad.
I had someone do that to me in June, and I literally couldn't move once she grabbed it - it was awful, especially because I know she was just trying to help, and once she finally let go, I still couldn't get out properly, causing my chair to tip forward and my (filled) waterbottle to fall out of its holder and smash on the sidewalk (I actually got so sick of people holding the doors, or pulling them out of my hands, that week that I started going in through a different entrance just to keep them from doing it - I was taking a weeklong seminar at a nearby college campus, and not all the doors there have buttons; I get that at least some of them were trying to be nice, and sometimes I let them hold the door for me, but I wanted to make sure they all knew that I could get through a door all on my own just fine, too, to bust that myth for anyone there who may have held that belief). I've since told people either to not grab it if they're heading toward doing it, or to let go if they already have (another time, completely unrelated to that first one, someone pulled me forward so hard I would have fallen on my face if she hadn't let go). If there's a group of us and someone decides to hold the door for all of us, that's one thing, but if I'm the only one who needs to go through it, I actually prefer to do it myself.
Hello this is my first time to watch your RUclips video clips
When people adjust the height on my crutches.😳
Why!!?? What on earth for?
My brother does this to me ALL THE TIME ITS SO ANNOYING!!!
I think in a way I've been lucky. Growing up in CA I've been around allot of different ppl. I saw someone grab another person in a wheelchair. At 1st I thought oh friend or family but the woman reacted negatively. I would too. I stepped in. At 1st I acted like we were friends. Oh there u r. I been looking for you. I let the guy kw it wasn't right.
I just realized an interesting accessibility complication. Blind people need the yellow bumped area to find crosswalks, but that must be incredibly difficult for someone in a wheelchair to go over. There's no way to help both in that situation.
In a power chair now, but when I was in a manual, many healthcare workers would just push my chair all around. Many times I would ask them not to, and that I can move myself. I found some didn’t like that. At times I really needed to keep on their good side. But I thought it rude and invasive, I really didn’t like it at all. It is personal space and right to self-determination.
Whilst I agree with you on all comments you have said I think it’s worth pointing out that I am a wheelchair user I have been all my life myself my grandad but out once and he couldn’t breathe breath because he had COPD lent on my friends chair didn’t mean anything by it I think people should also take into consideration that things like this someone struggling to brave the personMy grandad held onto where is a good friend of mine but he kind of said get off my wheelchair for Grandad didn’t mean any harm I just couldn’t breathe so couldn’t say please can I just thought like the bear in mind the circumstances Might be worth mentioning my friend was closer to my grandad than me at this Moved to the side to let somebody sit down whilst we waited for the bus My grandad bless him want her to fly he felt so bad but he just couldn’t breathe I think my friend overreacted just considering the circumstance
I'm a C4-5 incomplete quadriplegic and I can feel everything from head to toe the same way I did before. One of the most annoying things is when I'm waiting in line at a store and there's someone behind me lightly tapping the back wheels of my power chair. I can bloody feel that and it's damn right annoying!! An able bodied person wouldn't like someone to be kicking them constantly in the back of their heel while they wait so why do some people think it's ok to do that to a wheelchair??
It’s no different than someone touching your service dog. Hands off.
Even my best friend mindlessly pushed my chair once not knowing my foot rest was of and my toes were resting on the wheels! I still have my toes luckily.
Another great video Guys! DB and Shaun doing a great job supporting you lol :) Makes me feel sick the way people do this, I think I have a lot of unresolved anger when it comes to this area of my disability !!!
The best thing about one of my sets of power assist wheels is if you touch me whilst I'm using them you will get a shock. My own kids have this weird game (boys!) Of seeing who can rack up the most shocks when we are out 😳
I am blind and I was walking in a store and some random person grabbed my cane by grabbed I mean yanked pushed me out the store and threw it at me. Then they to me to die. So I completely understand.
does the store have security cameras near where you were? if theres footage you could get legal help or at least have them banned from the store
OMG! I once worked for a blind law professor and acted as a guide at times. I would have been an uncontrollable beast if someone treated him that way!
Spot on as usual Gem! :)
Honestly, I think it is ridiculous that people think they have the right to do so! People really need to stop living in their own little bubbles. I taught bear from small on how to behave when she sees someone who is disabled etc, I told her that they are people just like us, when she was little we had a speaker who was a military vet but who had missing limbs and I told her it's not changing him in the way that he is no longer human you treat him with respect as you would any other person. It was a really big thing for me for my kid to be aware of everyone in this world and people having conditions. Does this make any sense? Also on a side note that neon pink looks stunning on you Gem!
Totally makes sense. Thanks for the complement 😍
Yes! Disabled people are people that just might need a little extra room or a little extra help. Either way respect and permission/consent is necessary just like anyone else.
Perfect sense to me. But there's bound to be someone IRL or in the comments moaning about us daring to challenge non-disabled people. We'll be called "ungrateful", "oversensitive" and some will make threats not to help us - when none of these things Gem has highlighted are helping us. 🤦
@@evelynkrull5268 That would mean they would have to see us as equal first.
Had people ram me with trolleys before and I just ask them of they want to give me £6000 to replace my chair if it is damaged and they just turn and mumble at me. The worst I had was a woman with a giant bag on her arm and she smacked me in my face, turned to look what she had hit and gave me a filthy look. I tend to have elderly people lean on my chair to have a breather, or people go to touch my handles to move me and then pretend they did not do it when I turn to look. I removed my handles and not had any problems since, I think if someone actually touched me I would just scream!
Several times, I've been going down the main aisle of a store and someone with a cart has tried to go from a side aisle into the main aisle (i.e. I had the right of way and the other person did not) right as I go past, and some of them have given me dirty looks when I go by, as if it was my fault they couldn't just barge out without bothering to look to see whether there was any cross traffic first. I've learned which aisles in which stores have the right of way and which don't, and I do enforce it when needed, and sometimes that means that I let my chair and the person's cart (carefully) make contact. Probably the worst one (I'll preface this by saying that I have luggage forks on the front of my chair and I had a shopping basket sitting on them when this happened, so my chair itself wasn't damaged in any way - the only thing that took any impact was the basket) was one time when I was in the grocery store in the main aisle, and someone in a diagonal side aisle was pushing her cart and looking back and forth between down at her phone and at something back behind her (while still pushing the cart forward); I kept my eye on her (I was still 15-20 ft away), but she continued to not pay attention to where she was going, and right at the last moment as I was about to go around her, she suddenly turned her cart such that there wasn't enough room on either side of her for me to pass, and I couldn't slow down fast enough (SmartDrives have a sometimes frustratingly slow reaction time, even when not going very fast, and even when they are responding quickly, you still can't stop short unless you run into something hard enough to make the motor stop), so I crashed right into her cart. It wasn't until my chair (again, the shopping basket took 100% of the impact) collided with her cart that she even bothered to look in front of her to see where she was going - I made a "well, that was 100% your fault" face at her and went on my way.
I've only had someone move me without permission once, and as soon as I realized I was moving, I grabbed my wheels to make her stop and very sternly told her, "I've GOT it," (in front of about 15 of my relatives, I'll add, one of whom was also in a chair, but she had her daughter pushing her). My sister barely kept from screaming at ME, as if it was *MY* fault that someone had 1) not bothered to even ask me to move (I actually wouldn't have been able to anyway, because there wasn't enough space around me unless the other people moved, too - that was back when I was stuck using a standard manual that was way too big for me and the footrests stuck way out in front; I now have a custom that has a very tight turning radius, so I would have been able to with my current one, but not the one I had at the time), and because she was behind me, I couldn't see that she was trying to get through, either; and 2) done the equivalent of the first example in the video, complete with coming up behind me with no warning.
My push handles fold down, and I have a feeling that that is part of the reason I haven't had someone try to push me without permission except that one time.