If I can be of more help to you, you are welcome to leave a comment down below with your story or your experience with suicide. If you have any pieces of advice on what helped you find a way out of these thoughts, please share them in the comments as well. Let us be there for each other. Also, check out the video I created on how to help someone who is struggling with suicidal thoughts. Understanding how these thoughts can develop can be of great help in understanding yourself better: ruclips.net/video/yZJ7U9BXG10/видео.html.
I’m 49, and tired of battling through different episodes of mental Ill health in the form of horrible depressions. It takes a bit of strength from you each time
@@kelseymathias3881 Hi, My youtube history got erased. I made mistakes on Settings. Hope you can reply, then I think i can reply again to you. Thanks.. Kal
Been feeling extremely lonely. Feeling unloved and unwanted. I just want to be truly happy and optimistic again. Everyday is a massive challenge for me. Suicide has been on my mind
Here for you LAO. As Alyce said, you aren't alone. Sending you so much love and a warm hug. If there is anything more on your mind, write it out. I will come to reply.
@@JellisVaes thank you I appreciate it. What has helped me is staying busy as much as I can and watching videos like these. It helps to know im not the only one that goes through this and everyone supports each other
@@lao8277 Spending time, through watching videos or listening to podcasts of others who went through the same, is indeed really helpful! You truly can get through this LAO.
Quit a toxic job got a new one but then got let go. I’ve been struggling so much and wanting to die, thinking of ways to die that won’t be shameful. This helped greatly.
I have been suicidal for years and the pain intensified 1o fold after parents died and 2 old brothers ostracized me from inheritance and the family and extended family. The extended family believes & takes their side. I have not 1 family member who's got my back. Just God. And thats sometimes all you need.
Hey, sounds like you are going through a tough time there. If you like to share anything more about what is going on, here for you. Did any of the tips and pieces of advice speak to you?
@@JellisVaes Thank you for the video and for taking the time to answer me.I never attempted suicide but i sometimes think about it.I take psychiatric medication. I have clinical depression,anxiety and schizoid personality.I just feel this overwhelming frustration due to the fact that the physical,emotional, social,educational,professional, financial,sexual and spiritual areas of my life are all a mess.Its a daily struggle to stay grounded and positive. Thank you once again
🕊️😞 Ran across this as I’m in a very dark pit of deep sadness, heartbreak, sorrowful pain, & heavy grief.💔😰💔The recent loss of my beloved adopted mom, has been completely devastating she passed right before Christmas which will never be the same again. During a surge of Covid which also didn’t make it any easier, I lost much needed more time I could’ve had with her. 💔l will never be the same, as life feels completely grey, meaningless, a huge part of me is dead.😪😢😪 My biological father has been gone as of May 3rd for over nineteen years with Fatherless Day coming up I’m reminded of how orphaned I am. Being parentless the gaping hole is deeper more emptier as a young millennial I’m in an age group where most of my peers have at least one parent if not both, or even a loving step parent or aren’t even adoptees/former foster children. So they can’t fully relate, 😔😢😔Having no parent to rely on for guidance, support, wisdom, in such an at times cruel dark evil world/society is so lonely and isolating, the things they won’t or ever see if I’m sick or suffering health wise or hospitalized they’ll never be by my side, I won’t have them to hold my hand. 💔😔💔The experiences they have missed or will the future I won’t have with them. 😪😭😪As a spiritual person and somewhat religious Catholic, my faith, belief, trust even in God has been shattered. 🥀 Where is he in all of this, why me? I feel forsaken and abandoned by God having been abandoned by my biological mother whom I don’t exist to still this very day.💔 I don’t know how to go on or carry on, after so much loss, deep sadness abandonment, and pain, if not heartbreak, everything just gets stripped away.💔😰🌏 People say it gets better it doesn’t, it gets different but not less painful, if I could just simply pick up the phone and call my mom. It’s surreal still nearly two years I can’t call her, or go home away from home to see her and be in her company.😢😭😥I don’t see the point anymore, in this thickness of heavy fog regardless if the sun is rising, shining, setting, or the birds are chirping, things continuing to move forward I’ve withdrawn from everything and everyone I’m no longer happy and don’t feel I ever authentically could be again my world has been rocked. 😢😞😥I just simply want out of this suffering and world I’d rather be with my parents and other loss loved ones. Who cared about me and loved me more than anyone here in this life could.😰😪😰 My phenomenal loving adopted mom was the mother I never had. 😰💔😭 #GriefHurts #HateThisLife
Hey Michael, I am only sending love to you and a big hug. I can see life has been incredibly hard and unfair to you. I don’t know exactly what to say to you that could make anything better but know that I hear your pain and see you. If there is anything more you’d like to share, please do. Please remember that you don't have to go through this alone. Reach out to friends, family, or support groups who can provide a listening ear and offer comfort during this difficult time. Take care of yourself, be patient with your healing process, and know that there are people who care about you and want to support you.
I'm 19,i've been feeling really down and on the edge since 17 ,i feel so numb ,nothing makes me really comfortable ,i lost interest in everything when i remember everything will be end and i dont know what to do to feel good even though i dont know what future brings ,it really hurts ,but i just pray for everyone to feel good ,take care guys
It's too much for many of us. They need to legalise and have clinics you can go in and come out as ash or in a burial box. Death with Dignity. 💚 Live life if you can, do all you can but there is an out 🖤
Mate, I am sorry to read this. Truly. There is little I can say that will instantly change your situation, but know that somewhere there is a person (me) thinking of you and rooting for you. Always here if you'd like a chat or if you want to share something more here.
@happycatsandhappydogs Not good. Thank you for asking. I am very sorry. I have to choose between the hell here or the hell there. I don't know which to choose. I am certain that Christ is for people, just not for me. I helped a lot of people, too. But when they did not need my help, they said I never helped them. Okay, so be it. And then when I asked for their help, they kicked me in the teeth. I don't think I can last much longer. I am going to be stuck in a frozen lake forever. Alone. I am sorry.
@happycatsandhappydogs Thank you. I am paying for my past wickedness. I made some horrible mistakes. I tried to make up for them, but once again I have failed. I wish I tried a little harder. I survived two murder attempts by drowning, and I've had four major concussions. I have constant hissing in my brain. Surprisingly, I am very, very physically strong. I just deadlifted 275 lbs for 15 reps in a row. I can max at 405 lbs. I only weigh 165 even though I am 6'1". I am eating very healthy. Maybe you should try weightlifting? Love
Hey man you helped me, I study psychology too, did a lot of similar stuff you did. I've always been afraid to talk about it because it feels like I shouldn't be struggling with this.
I get what you mean. Psychologists or people who study psychology can struggle with mental health issues too. The same as a doctor who can get a cold as well. Many people seem to forget that. Which can indeed make it hard for a psychologist or someone studying it, to openly talk about their problems. However, I think that not talking about it, also denies it in a way that anyone can struggle at some point. And that's not the best message to show to the world either. How are you today actually?
@@JellisVaes yeah man it’s really brave. Need more guys to talk about this. No more silence behind guys talking about their emotions and their experiences. So really bravo to you. Hope your powerful words spread far and wide!
I’m 75 and have metastatic bladder cancer. After the election, I have felt, not actively suicidal, but wishing I might fall asleep and not wake up. I believe this is passive ideation. It’s very hard to pullout of.
Without my life story keeping it short - I've had depression my whole life!! I smoked weed daily to escape for 20 years but since giving up 2 years ago my depression has hit an all time high. I've been fighting my demons but lately I have become very alone. lost my family, my friends, my hobbies, my purpose and strength. I have never met anyone who really understands what its like and how hard it is to live with deep depression. I'm 38 years old and thoughts cross my mind daily. I watched your story and will give your tips a try.............
Here for you. Sending you a big hug! Life can be anything but easy. Thanks for sharing part of your story. Do give the tips that I talk about a try. They could bring some kind of change that could make the darkness a bit less.
You mention comedy and having a sense of humour, the thing is, when you are gripped by a serious depression it’s impossible to laugh at anything, let alone concentrate . Your advice on that is ok for a mild or maybe medium depression.
Read through the comments... you're correct about humor. Severe depression doesn't laugh at anything. ( or planting, excersizing. ) I'm really not doing well, destroyed life, and caused mental illness.
Hi.. My life was totally destroyed from sept-nov. 1st, my 2 young adult children left, 1 to college in Wash. 1 to N.Y. to be with girlfriend. Empty nester. Then My Grandma dies,... then her son dies, then his son dies!!. 💔 Then.. I made a terrible mistake at work. And lost my Dream career job after 22 yrs.!!😫 It was way more than just employment.! Was the foundation of my life! connected to my life. All my closest friends, my purpose, identity..!! I Loved driving the city bus, and with my seniority,.. I had the best schedules, routes, days off . I'm totally devastated. I suffer from Stress, Anxiety, Insomnia and severe depression. My eyesight went bad from the extreme stress... and my health has declined. I just can't do, or go anywhere... Depression is horrible.. How about you?.. what happened..?
@@klanderkal For me it’s the realisation that I’ve been drifting for so long, I haven’t worked for over 10!years, no relationship for the same, depression and anxiety combines with bad insomnia. So yeah, things are rough. I blame myself for the life I’ve lead
@@JellisVaes I made a dance project after reading it that focuses on Viktor Frankl and a few others. I was able to speak to a direct associate of Viktor Frankl which was super cool. It is a few months old, but you might like it: themeandintention.com
@@JellisVaes Thanks Jellis. I’m struggling big time at the moment. Just trying to hold on minute by minute. Everything is SO painful and I have so much anxiety and depression. Appreciate your efforts in putting yourself out into a public space to support others.
@@JellisVaes Hi Jellis. It’s so amazing of you to check in with me. It’s been tough and I am fighting the darkness everyday but thank you for your kindness.
Life is extremely hard not fair at all we just try are best and hope something changes but it never does then the depression gets worse so you just want a way out so you consider suicidal thoughts and how great it would feel to not have this pain in your heart anymore
Nice and helpful video. As someone who is suffering from chronic depression since childhood over four decades now, I can also recommend the (audio) books from Alan Watts, a philosopher from the 50s, 60s. Or some similar spiritual guiding/ training for the mind. Greetings from Germany
@@JellisVaes I think he might mean if your circumstances are difficult and hard to leave, like being tied to a difficult career, then suicidality is harder to escape through health and hobby changes alone - those don't directly target the job situation. I'm currently at struggle with some of that myself school-wise and find it hard to stay on track with these suggestions when your work burns you out. That said, I do think the video suggestions help lots of people, and they absolutely don't hurt independent of the situation. And seeking better relationships as you suggest can lead to encouragement in finding other work opportunities.
Sorry for being this direct but if there was anyone to talk to about this then I probably wouldn't be turning to RUclips for advice. Seriously, I've never been as socially isolated as I am at this moment.
Hey Phil, don’t worry in being direct. I understand your comment. Ideally, yes, going to a professional therapist would be a great step to take. However, not everyone can afford it or is always comfortable with going to one. Blog posts, podcast interviews, or youtube videos are a great first way for many people (since it is free and easy to access) to find support and help. Anyway. Sucks to hear you are feeling this way. Being socially isolated is a horrible feeling. How long have you been feeling this way? As well, has anything particular happened/changed in your life that led to you feeling socially isolated?
@@JellisVaes Thank you for your response. I don't just "feel" socially isolated, I really am. I have ok medical insurance and I could probably afford therapy but why bother? I'm 54 years old and have been a loner and friendless all of my life. So, by this time I'm obviously damaged goods and 'not field repairable' as they say in the service industry. So, is therapy really worth it? For example, how often do you repair an old beat up used car before you decide to just take it to the junkyard? Which leads me back to the subject of the video. When will it be time to "junk" this mortal shell and move on? Frankly, I'm kinda looking forward to the next life. There's nothing really left to live for here and I'm not really living anyway, only existing.
When I was living with suicidal thoughts for 6 years, a thought that comforted me and led me to take action was to change my circumstances was: life will end anyway. The thing you are wishing for will happen eventually. So why not, now that you are still here, try to do what you can do to see how life possibly could turn out. You are not old junk my friend. You are still young. Even though you might not feel this way. Becoming stuck in a certain way of thinking can lead to a tunnel vision where you do not see the complete reality of how life can be. While I understand your analogy, humans compared to a car are plastic. We can deliberately rewire our brains to feel happy and good again. This is what you do in therapy. Therefore, at any age therapy is worth it. As well your situation of being socially isolated can become different. Again, a therapist can help you by giving a step by step practical plan. If I may give you a few suggestions: 1. Search for a therapist who practices cognitive-behavioral therapy. You have nothing to lose by trying, right? So give it a shot. This truly can make an enormous difference. 2. I did an interview on suicide on The IPS Podcast (a podcast I host), together with an expert on this topic. It could be worth checking to learn more about this topic. theipsproject.com/2018/04/coping-with-suicidal-thoughts/ Here for you Phil. Let me know if you may give these suggestions a try.
@@JellisVaes Nietzsche said, "He who has a why to live can bare almost any how." I need a why, desperately. It's become a matter of life and death, literally.
You are right Phil. Having a reason to live, and having meaning in your life is vital. I am trying what I can do support people. Therefore, note that I am merely offering the following in the hopes that it might help you: First, I am a therapist, you are always welcome to book a consultation with me to see if we can work on this together: calendly.com/jellisvaes/35min If you rather like to work on this by yourself, I have a course (for a very affordable price) where I teach the techniques from cognitive behavioral therapy, so you can start working on your past wounds and become unstuck in life. Here is the link to the full course description: www.udemy.com/course/healing-yourself-through-cognitive-behavioral-therapy-cbt/?referralCode=AC44C6ED21E5D8A4822F Again, I am merely suggesting this to help.
Anything that happened recently that you’d like to share? Or can you see any recurring thoughts that are making you feel more down than up at the moment?
The worst part is i dont regret what i did. It did not felt bad. It was just great sleep and everything was over. My mom found me and took me to the hospital... But i feel more motivated for doing it again
My body is my problem. Health issues for years, recently had a stroke. Now my life is going downhill haven't worked running out of money. Ive lost my independence. I can't write my name anymore. I can't do the things i love anymore.
There should be a safe/controlled way to commit suicide. I’ve been alone my whole life, all I have is money and silence, I constantly see people my age having relationships and it happens automatically for them just in daily life. At barley 5’4 99% of women won’t consider me an option no matter how much I make them laugh, I permanently get friend zoned. I don’t believe I want to live till 45.
Hey, my friend. Here for you. Great questions. And a very fair one to ask. Therapy might appear scary in the beginning because it is new. However, once you arrived at your appointment, you will see there was never a need to be scared. Therapists are trained professionals to help you. They will know and understand what you are struggling with. And will only want to help you. Do not fear going to therapy, it can truly change your life. If you like to read a bit more about how to find a good therapist check the following article I wrote: theipsproject.com/2021/08/how-to-find-a-good-therapist/. And if you still have some worries about going to therapy, check this one: theipsproject.com/2021/08/i-want-to-go-to-therapy/. Hope this helps. Let me know if there is anything else you’d like to share or talk about.
It's not scary just expensive and pointless and many thearapist are narcissist and abusers who just like to abuse and insult clients further they get paid either way which is obviously all they care about they care about as much about you as a dealer cares about his customers my experience thearapy is an expensive crock 🥱
I know this might not change anything about this rage that your feeling. But I just want you to know that I am thinking about you. I wish I could give you a hug. I am sending you a big virtual hug though. Here if you like a chat.
No one is immune to suicidal thoughts. Looks, money, or whatever else does not make you immune to it. It's at a deeper level the healing starts. If you have not tried going to a therapist, I would highly recommend you to ask for aid from a professional therapist. It's worth the money. Sending you lots of love my friend.
Hey mate, I don't know what to make of this comment. Just wishing you the best in life. I hope you can work through this darkness you might be going through. Always here for a chat.
Oh no, not Tony Robbins, he's very misogynistic. He offers the worst "relationship advice" during one on one audience sessions, that always favours men. He also uses a very bad "technique" in these interactions of bullying the person in front of everyone to tear them down to make them more suseptible to his bu..hit advice. Sorry for the rant. But otherwise nice video, thank you for sharing.
That's a bit harsh. I am sure for some it might be helpful. But, look, if you are in a very bad place right now, yes, I get it all can seem useless. I am sorry for the pain you are currently going through. From out of the list that I share, is there something that you have genuinely tried?
@ I will be honest. I watched the whole video and in the state I was in when I found it, I couldn’t take in a single word. I don’t remember anything you said, or whether I’ve tried it or not. As soon as I clicked on the video I felt like you were taking on the responsibility of helping me get through it. And by the end of the video I would have been willing to give you some amount of blame for not being successful. I am sorry but it’s just what my sick brain did. I don’t know how many people found this hoping it would help, couldn’t listen to a word of it over their depression and went on to carry out their intention. Again, I’m sorry to even say such a horrible thing, but this is what my sick brain does to me. Just like I think this video shouldn’t exist, I think I shouldn’t have said anything. But since I always do the wrong thing, that comment, and this response would have both been wrong whether I said them or not. So I figure. In for a penny, in for a pound.
It’s okay, my friend. Life is… hard, to put it lightly. But mate, please, don’t give up. I don’t know you, and you might not believe me, but damn, dude, I believe in you. I’m rooting for you to get better. The uncomfortable truth, though, that I like to remind you of: merely watching a video alone won’t fix anything. Action is always required. Take a small step forward toward a better tomorrow. I know you can. Sending you much love. Always here for a chat-I’m serious.
@JellisVaes you didn't follow through. Most people in my family die from either cancer or suicide. If someone really wants to end their life, they will fully commit to the task. I've seen it enough. I'm sure the people who care about him are glad he didn't follow through, but from an even objective view with a dash of dark humor, he epically failed.
If I can be of more help to you, you are welcome to leave a comment down below with your story or your experience with suicide. If you have any pieces of advice on what helped you find a way out of these thoughts, please share them in the comments as well. Let us be there for each other.
Also, check out the video I created on how to help someone who is struggling with suicidal thoughts. Understanding how these thoughts can develop can be of great help in understanding yourself better: ruclips.net/video/yZJ7U9BXG10/видео.html.
I’m 49, and tired of battling through different episodes of mental Ill health in the form of horrible depressions. It takes a bit of strength from you each time
It takes A LOT of strength from you
@@kelseymathias3881 True
@@kelseymathias3881 Hi, My youtube history got erased. I made mistakes on Settings. Hope you can reply, then I think i can reply again to you. Thanks.. Kal
Hi, can you reply to this? My comments were erased, I messed up on settings. Pls reply and I ill see if replying is possible. tnx Kal
@@klanderkal Hi, I can reply.
Been feeling extremely lonely. Feeling unloved and unwanted. I just want to be truly happy and optimistic again. Everyday is a massive challenge for me. Suicide has been on my mind
I completely understand. I feel the same . You aren’t alone . You matter and you are worthy of love and security . Sending you love ❤️
@@auraoptics thank you I really appreciate your message
Here for you LAO. As Alyce said, you aren't alone. Sending you so much love and a warm hug. If there is anything more on your mind, write it out. I will come to reply.
@@JellisVaes thank you I appreciate it. What has helped me is staying busy as much as I can and watching videos like these. It helps to know im not the only one that goes through this and everyone supports each other
@@lao8277 Spending time, through watching videos or listening to podcasts of others who went through the same, is indeed really helpful! You truly can get through this LAO.
It's over. I'm just waiting to die, having a "good" or "bad" life doesn't matter. I didn't choose to live, but fortunately it'll end one day
We don't have to wait though
Quit a toxic job got a new one but then got let go. I’ve been struggling so much and wanting to die, thinking of ways to die that won’t be shameful. This helped greatly.
Unemployed father of 1, homeless have hanged myself before don't whether to say I was saved or disturbed every day I wake up I just wish I never did
God bless you brother. I hope you make it to the end of the tunnel. The world can be a dark dark place.
I have been suicidal for years and the pain intensified 1o fold after parents died and 2 old brothers ostracized me from inheritance and the family and extended family. The extended family believes & takes their side. I have not 1 family member who's got my back. Just God. And thats sometimes all you need.
God is with you always🙏
I just want to go Home. This place isntt home.
Omg I feel this so hard
samee
Same, I'm with my family but I don't belong here
@@spacebucket8865same😢
@spacebucket8865 me too😢
I feel like a failure in all areas of my life. Feel miserable and suicidal
Hey, sounds like you are going through a tough time there. If you like to share anything more about what is going on, here for you. Did any of the tips and pieces of advice speak to you?
@@JellisVaes
Thank you for the video and for taking the time to answer me.I never attempted suicide but i sometimes think about it.I take psychiatric medication. I have clinical depression,anxiety and schizoid personality.I just feel this overwhelming frustration due to the fact that the physical,emotional, social,educational,professional, financial,sexual and spiritual areas of my life are all a mess.Its a daily struggle to stay grounded and positive. Thank you once again
Wow, that sounds all very overwhelming. Are you actually working with a therapist?
@@JellisVaes
Working with different therapists for many years.Diverse schools,freudian,jungian,gestalt
you should read the power of now by eckhart tolle and meditate daily it helped me a lot also going to the gym is a natural antidepressant
🕊️😞 Ran across this as I’m in a very dark pit of deep sadness, heartbreak, sorrowful pain, & heavy grief.💔😰💔The recent loss of my beloved adopted mom, has been completely devastating she passed right before Christmas which will never be the same again. During a surge of Covid which also didn’t make it any easier, I lost much needed more time I could’ve had with her. 💔l will never be the same, as life feels completely grey, meaningless, a huge part of me is dead.😪😢😪 My biological father has been gone as of May 3rd for over nineteen years with Fatherless Day coming up I’m reminded of how orphaned I am. Being parentless the gaping hole is deeper more emptier as a young millennial I’m in an age group where most of my peers have at least one parent if not both, or even a loving step parent or aren’t even adoptees/former foster children. So they can’t fully relate, 😔😢😔Having no parent to rely on for guidance, support, wisdom, in such an at times cruel dark evil world/society is so lonely and isolating, the things they won’t or ever see if I’m sick or suffering health wise or hospitalized they’ll never be by my side, I won’t have them to hold my hand. 💔😔💔The experiences they have missed or will the future I won’t have with them. 😪😭😪As a spiritual person and somewhat religious Catholic, my faith, belief, trust even in God has been shattered. 🥀 Where is he in all of this, why me? I feel forsaken and abandoned by God having been abandoned by my biological mother whom I don’t exist to still this very day.💔 I don’t know how to go on or carry on, after so much loss, deep sadness abandonment, and pain, if not heartbreak, everything just gets stripped away.💔😰🌏 People say it gets better it doesn’t, it gets different but not less painful, if I could just simply pick up the phone and call my mom. It’s surreal still nearly two years I can’t call her, or go home away from home to see her and be in her company.😢😭😥I don’t see the point anymore, in this thickness of heavy fog regardless if the sun is rising, shining, setting, or the birds are chirping, things continuing to move forward I’ve withdrawn from everything and everyone I’m no longer happy and don’t feel I ever authentically could be again my world has been rocked. 😢😞😥I just simply want out of this suffering and world I’d rather be with my parents and other loss loved ones. Who cared about me and loved me more than anyone here in this life could.😰😪😰 My phenomenal loving adopted mom was the mother I never had. 😰💔😭 #GriefHurts #HateThisLife
Hey Michael, I am only sending love to you and a big hug. I can see life has been incredibly hard and unfair to you. I don’t know exactly what to say to you that could make anything better but know that I hear your pain and see you. If there is anything more you’d like to share, please do.
Please remember that you don't have to go through this alone. Reach out to friends, family, or support groups who can provide a listening ear and offer comfort during this difficult time. Take care of yourself, be patient with your healing process, and know that there are people who care about you and want to support you.
I'm 19,i've been feeling really down and on the edge since 17 ,i feel so numb ,nothing makes me really comfortable ,i lost interest in everything when i remember everything will be end and i dont know what to do to feel good even though i dont know what future brings ,it really hurts ,but i just pray for everyone to feel good ,take care guys
It's too much for many of us. They need to legalise and have clinics you can go in and come out as ash or in a burial box. Death with Dignity.
💚 Live life if you can, do all you can but there is an out 🖤
Male, just divorced at 56 after 25 years of marriage.
I do not want to be here anymore.
Mate, I am sorry to read this. Truly. There is little I can say that will instantly change your situation, but know that somewhere there is a person (me) thinking of you and rooting for you. Always here if you'd like a chat or if you want to share something more here.
@happycatsandhappydogs
Not good. Thank you for asking.
I am very sorry. I have to choose between the hell here or the hell there. I don't know which to choose.
I am certain that Christ is for people, just not for me.
I helped a lot of people, too. But when they did not need my help, they said I never helped them. Okay, so be it. And then when I asked for their help, they kicked me in the teeth.
I don't think I can last much longer. I am going to be stuck in a frozen lake forever. Alone. I am sorry.
@happycatsandhappydogs
Thank you. I am paying for my past wickedness. I made some horrible mistakes. I tried to make up for them, but once again I have failed.
I wish I tried a little harder. I survived two murder attempts by drowning, and I've had four major concussions. I have constant hissing in my brain.
Surprisingly, I am very, very physically strong. I just deadlifted 275 lbs for 15 reps in a row. I can max at 405 lbs. I only weigh 165 even though I am 6'1".
I am eating very healthy.
Maybe you should try weightlifting?
Love
I’m so sorry you’re hurting. Sending you love.
Hey man you helped me, I study psychology too, did a lot of similar stuff you did. I've always been afraid to talk about it because it feels like I shouldn't be struggling with this.
I get what you mean. Psychologists or people who study psychology can struggle with mental health issues too. The same as a doctor who can get a cold as well. Many people seem to forget that. Which can indeed make it hard for a psychologist or someone studying it, to openly talk about their problems. However, I think that not talking about it, also denies it in a way that anyone can struggle at some point. And that's not the best message to show to the world either. How are you today actually?
Well done for sharing your story!
Appreciate the comment!
@@JellisVaes yeah man it’s really brave. Need more guys to talk about this. No more silence behind guys talking about their emotions and their experiences. So really bravo to you. Hope your powerful words spread far and wide!
I’m 75 and have metastatic bladder cancer. After the election, I have felt, not actively suicidal, but wishing I might fall asleep and not wake up. I believe this is passive ideation. It’s very hard to pullout of.
Without my life story keeping it short - I've had depression my whole life!! I smoked weed daily to escape for 20 years but since giving up 2 years ago my depression has hit an all time high. I've been fighting my demons but lately I have become very alone. lost my family, my friends, my hobbies, my purpose and strength. I have never met anyone who really understands what its like and how hard it is to live with deep depression. I'm 38 years old and thoughts cross my mind daily. I watched your story and will give your tips a try.............
Here for you. Sending you a big hug! Life can be anything but easy. Thanks for sharing part of your story. Do give the tips that I talk about a try. They could bring some kind of change that could make the darkness a bit less.
It's my back up plan, but my life has to get better next summer
You mention comedy and having a sense of humour, the thing is, when you are gripped by a serious depression it’s impossible to laugh at anything, let alone concentrate . Your advice on that is ok for a mild or maybe medium depression.
Read through the comments... you're correct about humor.
Severe depression doesn't laugh at anything.
( or planting, excersizing. )
I'm really not doing well, destroyed life, and caused mental illness.
@@klanderkal What has happened? I understand how it feels, I’m going through depression myself
Hi.. My life was totally destroyed from sept-nov. 1st, my 2 young adult children left, 1 to college in Wash. 1 to N.Y. to be with girlfriend.
Empty nester. Then My Grandma dies,... then her son dies, then his son dies!!. 💔 Then.. I made a terrible mistake at work. And lost my Dream career job after 22 yrs.!!😫 It was way more than just employment.! Was the foundation of my life! connected to my life. All my closest friends, my purpose, identity..!! I Loved driving the city bus, and with my seniority,.. I had the best schedules, routes, days off . I'm totally devastated. I suffer from Stress, Anxiety, Insomnia and severe depression. My eyesight went bad from the extreme stress... and my health has declined. I just can't do, or go anywhere...
Depression is horrible..
How about you?.. what happened..?
@@klanderkal For me it’s the realisation that I’ve been drifting for so long, I haven’t worked for over 10!years, no relationship for the same, depression and anxiety combines with bad insomnia. So yeah, things are rough. I blame myself for the life I’ve lead
@@klanderkal Do you sleep ok?
Great video! 🌞
Glad it was helpful :).
Thank you for sharing this ❤️
Heey! I am glad the video was helpful. I also hope you know that I am here for you, if you like to share anything more.
Man's Search for Meaning was incredibly pivotal for me in my healing process, thank you so much for sharing your story 💛
Thank you for the comment. It's an incredible book!
@@JellisVaes I made a dance project after reading it that focuses on Viktor Frankl and a few others. I was able to speak to a direct associate of Viktor Frankl which was super cool. It is a few months old, but you might like it: themeandintention.com
@@falknerdischer495 Aah, thanks for sharing! That's pretty cool.
Feeling suicidal tonight and found this video. You helped me. Thanks.
Very happy to read the video helped Vicky! Here for you.
@@JellisVaes Thanks Jellis. I’m struggling big time at the moment. Just trying to hold on minute by minute. Everything is SO painful and I have so much anxiety and depression. Appreciate your efforts in putting yourself out into a public space to support others.
Hey Vicky, just wanted to check in and see how you have been?
@@JellisVaes Hi Jellis. It’s so amazing of you to check in with me. It’s been tough and I am fighting the darkness everyday but thank you for your kindness.
@misswarda78how are you now
Life is extremely hard not fair at all we just try are best and hope something changes but it never does then the depression gets worse so you just want a way out so you consider suicidal thoughts and how great it would feel to not have this pain in your heart anymore
Nice and helpful video.
As someone who is suffering from chronic depression since childhood over four decades now, I can also recommend the (audio) books from Alan Watts, a philosopher from the 50s, 60s.
Or some similar spiritual guiding/ training for the mind.
Greetings from Germany
Like the badder meinhoff/ red army faction. They offed themselves in prison to escape this shitty life.
I think this doesn’t apply to anyone who is slaved to a job
How do you mean?
@@JellisVaes I think he might mean if your circumstances are difficult and hard to leave, like being tied to a difficult career, then suicidality is harder to escape through health and hobby changes alone - those don't directly target the job situation. I'm currently at struggle with some of that myself school-wise and find it hard to stay on track with these suggestions when your work burns you out.
That said, I do think the video suggestions help lots of people, and they absolutely don't hurt independent of the situation. And seeking better relationships as you suggest can lead to encouragement in finding other work opportunities.
Sorry for being this direct but if there was anyone to talk to about this then I probably wouldn't be turning to RUclips for advice. Seriously, I've never been as socially isolated as I am at this moment.
Hey Phil, don’t worry in being direct. I understand your comment. Ideally, yes, going to a professional therapist would be a great step to take. However, not everyone can afford it or is always comfortable with going to one. Blog posts, podcast interviews, or youtube videos are a great first way for many people (since it is free and easy to access) to find support and help. Anyway. Sucks to hear you are feeling this way. Being socially isolated is a horrible feeling. How long have you been feeling this way? As well, has anything particular happened/changed in your life that led to you feeling socially isolated?
@@JellisVaes Thank you for your response. I don't just "feel" socially isolated, I really am. I have ok medical insurance and I could probably afford therapy but why bother? I'm 54 years old and have been a loner and friendless all of my life. So, by this time I'm obviously damaged goods and 'not field repairable' as they say in the service industry. So, is therapy really worth it?
For example, how often do you repair an old beat up used car before you decide to just take it to the junkyard?
Which leads me back to the subject of the video. When will it be time to "junk" this mortal shell and move on? Frankly, I'm kinda looking forward to the next life. There's nothing really left to live for here and I'm not really living anyway, only existing.
When I was living with suicidal thoughts for 6 years, a thought that comforted me and led me to take action was to change my circumstances was: life will end anyway. The thing you are wishing for will happen eventually. So why not, now that you are still here, try to do what you can do to see how life possibly could turn out.
You are not old junk my friend. You are still young. Even though you might not feel this way. Becoming stuck in a certain way of thinking can lead to a tunnel vision where you do not see the complete reality of how life can be.
While I understand your analogy, humans compared to a car are plastic. We can deliberately rewire our brains to feel happy and good again. This is what you do in therapy. Therefore, at any age therapy is worth it.
As well your situation of being socially isolated can become different. Again, a therapist can help you by giving a step by step practical plan.
If I may give you a few suggestions:
1. Search for a therapist who practices cognitive-behavioral therapy. You have nothing to lose by trying, right? So give it a shot. This truly can make an enormous difference.
2. I did an interview on suicide on The IPS Podcast (a podcast I host), together with an expert on this topic. It could be worth checking to learn more about this topic. theipsproject.com/2018/04/coping-with-suicidal-thoughts/
Here for you Phil. Let me know if you may give these suggestions a try.
@@JellisVaes Nietzsche said, "He who has a why to live can bare almost any how."
I need a why, desperately. It's become a matter of life and death, literally.
You are right Phil. Having a reason to live, and having meaning in your life is vital. I am trying what I can do support people. Therefore, note that I am merely offering the following in the hopes that it might help you:
First, I am a therapist, you are always welcome to book a consultation with me to see if we can work on this together: calendly.com/jellisvaes/35min
If you rather like to work on this by yourself, I have a course (for a very affordable price) where I teach the techniques from cognitive behavioral therapy, so you can start working on your past wounds and become unstuck in life. Here is the link to the full course description: www.udemy.com/course/healing-yourself-through-cognitive-behavioral-therapy-cbt/?referralCode=AC44C6ED21E5D8A4822F
Again, I am merely suggesting this to help.
Thanks man
No worries :). You okay there? Anything you'd like to share?
@@JellisVaes I don't know really, up and down I suppose, thank you for asking :)
@@MadeleineSwannSurreal More downs then ups at the moment?
@@JellisVaes yeah kind of, I think so
Anything that happened recently that you’d like to share? Or can you see any recurring thoughts that are making you feel more down than up at the moment?
I wish there was a just do this fix for this socially awkward no friends family no work just tired af trying to do the best I caj
The worst part is i dont regret what i did. It did not felt bad. It was just great sleep and everything was over. My mom found me and took me to the hospital... But i feel more motivated for doing it again
My body is my problem. Health issues for years, recently had a stroke. Now my life is going downhill haven't worked running out of money. Ive lost my independence. I can't write my name anymore. I can't do the things i love anymore.
There should be a safe/controlled way to commit suicide. I’ve been alone my whole life, all I have is money and silence, I constantly see people my age having relationships and it happens automatically for them just in daily life. At barley 5’4 99% of women won’t consider me an option no matter how much I make them laugh, I permanently get friend zoned. I don’t believe I want to live till 45.
I am so close to just letting go i keep reaching out but no one hears me i have no value and i just want to not feel again
I hear you my friend. And I am here. Reach out to me on Instagram, and we can have a chat if you like.
Can i ask if therapy is scary because i am meant to go to therapy because i have attempted suicide many times and i self harm but are they scary?
Hey, my friend. Here for you. Great questions. And a very fair one to ask. Therapy might appear scary in the beginning because it is new. However, once you arrived at your appointment, you will see there was never a need to be scared. Therapists are trained professionals to help you. They will know and understand what you are struggling with. And will only want to help you. Do not fear going to therapy, it can truly change your life. If you like to read a bit more about how to find a good therapist check the following article I wrote: theipsproject.com/2021/08/how-to-find-a-good-therapist/. And if you still have some worries about going to therapy, check this one: theipsproject.com/2021/08/i-want-to-go-to-therapy/. Hope this helps. Let me know if there is anything else you’d like to share or talk about.
It's not scary at all, you might feel a bit shy from sharing your personal experiences, but you will feel much better after you let it all out.
It's not scary just expensive and pointless and many thearapist are narcissist and abusers who just like to abuse and insult clients further they get paid either way which is obviously all they care about they care about as much about you as a dealer cares about his customers my experience thearapy is an expensive crock 🥱
Thank you so much. Im feeling so.. dead. And you actually rlly helped me. Thank you for sharing with us your story, i know its not easy. Thanks..
Here for you! Glad to read the video helped you. If you like to share anything what's been on your mind, I am here to listen. Lots of love to you.
I feel nothing but a huge rage
I know this might not change anything about this rage that your feeling. But I just want you to know that I am thinking about you. I wish I could give you a hug. I am sending you a big virtual hug though. Here if you like a chat.
@@JellisVaes thank u♥️ i wish i could really hug a kind person like you. I wish you have a great life
How are you feeling today?
I just don't want to be here anymore
How are you today? What keeps you going?
Im Homesick Bad. Bad.
You’re so attractive. If I looked like you I was be doing great
No one is immune to suicidal thoughts. Looks, money, or whatever else does not make you immune to it. It's at a deeper level the healing starts. If you have not tried going to a therapist, I would highly recommend you to ask for aid from a professional therapist. It's worth the money. Sending you lots of love my friend.
me me me, hope you make the step to the other side
Hey mate, I don't know what to make of this comment. Just wishing you the best in life. I hope you can work through this darkness you might be going through. Always here for a chat.
Oh no, not Tony Robbins, he's very misogynistic. He offers the worst "relationship advice" during one on one audience sessions, that always favours men. He also uses a very bad "technique" in these interactions of bullying the person in front of everyone to tear them down to make them more suseptible to his bu..hit advice. Sorry for the rant. But otherwise nice video, thank you for sharing.
💖💖
There is no way this will help
I am merely sharing what helped me.
@@JellisVaes It’s just my brain being a piece of 💩. Pay me no mind.
You shouldn’t have made this.
That's a bit harsh. I am sure for some it might be helpful. But, look, if you are in a very bad place right now, yes, I get it all can seem useless. I am sorry for the pain you are currently going through. From out of the list that I share, is there something that you have genuinely tried?
@ I will be honest. I watched the whole video and in the state I was in when I found it, I couldn’t take in a single word. I don’t remember anything you said, or whether I’ve tried it or not. As soon as I clicked on the video I felt like you were taking on the responsibility of helping me get through it. And by the end of the video I would have been willing to give you some amount of blame for not being successful. I am sorry but it’s just what my sick brain did. I don’t know how many people found this hoping it would help, couldn’t listen to a word of it over their depression and went on to carry out their intention.
Again, I’m sorry to even say such a horrible thing, but this is what my sick brain does to me. Just like I think this video shouldn’t exist, I think I shouldn’t have said anything. But since I always do the wrong thing, that comment, and this response would have both been wrong whether I said them or not. So I figure. In for a penny, in for a pound.
It’s okay, my friend. Life is… hard, to put it lightly. But mate, please, don’t give up. I don’t know you, and you might not believe me, but damn, dude, I believe in you. I’m rooting for you to get better.
The uncomfortable truth, though, that I like to remind you of: merely watching a video alone won’t fix anything. Action is always required. Take a small step forward toward a better tomorrow. I know you can. Sending you much love. Always here for a chat-I’m serious.
Epic fail.
Eh, what do you mean?
@JellisVaes you didn't follow through. Most people in my family die from either cancer or suicide. If someone really wants to end their life, they will fully commit to the task. I've seen it enough. I'm sure the people who care about him are glad he didn't follow through, but from an even objective view with a dash of dark humor, he epically failed.
@@volkoff6357that's what I'm saying