Personal Development School for Young Men # 001
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- Опубликовано: 14 июл 2024
- Welcome to the first episode of Personal Development School for Young Men. This is a personal development training course for young men who are looking for guidance and direction for self-improvement. There is a lack of good quality mentors and guides for young men to learn from when it comes to self-improvement and personal development. The personal development school aims to change that with this simple honest course.
0:00 Welcome to Personal Development School
1:23 Why listen to me?
2:46 What is Personal Development?
4:05 The Origins of Personal Development
5:32 The Growth of Personal Development
6:27 The Explosion of Personal Development
7:40 The Distortion of Personal Development
9:27 Why Young Men Want Success
11:12 How Personal Development Works
14:05 The Truth about Personal Development
About me: I am a professional speaker, writer, and run my own business. You can read my blog or learn more about my work here: midsonshort.com/ 
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Very helpful and well explained. Great video
Taking a more active role in your own life is never going to be wrong. It all begins and ends with what you believe. What you tell yourself really does matter. In order to use the power, you first have to understand that you have it. YOU recognizing that you can take care of your own needs and solve your own problems. You can sustain yourself. People are not helpless. They can and do have a choice, in nearly every situation that could present itself.
Challenging your thoughts may seem odd when you are not used to it, but people usually see the benefits of doing it pretty quickly. So much of what we all do is really just a habitual reaction - even our own thoughts and how we think. It's so empowering to learn that because it means that you can change it if you don't like it. The more you focus and pay attention, the more negative thoughts you will probably notice, many of them are not only negative but exagerrated, distorted or just plain not true. Once you have pinpointed the negative thoughts, you can start assessing them. Are your thoughts factual? Are you jumping to conclusions? Is there maybe another way to look at the situation that you hadn't thought of? Is the situation really as bad as you think it is? By challenging your negative thoughts, you test their accuracy. You will often find that they are in fact not accurate, or that the situation is not as bad as you thought it was. Doing this can help you stop negative self-talk in its tracks because many times the only reason it has such a foothold in your mind is because it was an unnoticed habit.
That's why even after you've identified and challenged your negative thinking, you may still find yourself doing it. Habits are hard to break! The best way to change this is to change the way you're reacting to things. Instead of having an emotional reaction, focus on having a factual one instead. Not reacting emotionally to things can be difficult at first but it's 100% possible and gets easier over time. Reacting emotionally is, in it's own way, just as much of a habit as anything else we as human beings do, and habits can be broken.
The key to defeating self-talk is to remember that you are not your thoughts. You are not your feelings. These things are not reality or some unimpeachable truth. They're just thoughts. They're just feelings. They don't define you, and they don't control you. A lot of times, they're just habit. With a little bit of practice, you can control them and then your mind will be working for you, not against you.
The way to start repairing self esteem and learned helplessnes is to take control, both of your life and your feelings. No one is responsible for your feelings or your life but you, and no one can fix these things but you. A great way to start doing that is by making goals. They don't have to be anything big , it's better to set smaller, more achievable goals. If your goal is large, you can break it down into steps so that it is less overwhelming and you will have more of a sense of accomplishment as you achieve each step Doing it that way helps break down something that seems overwhelming and impossible into things that are totally achievable. Doing it one step at a time is much more manageable than facing everything at once. You can't do all the steps at once anyway, so it makes sense to look at it one thing at a time.
If your goal is to save $5000 to put as a downpayment on a new house, that $5000 can look pretty big when you are starting at $0. So maybe your goal can be to save $400 a month, or $100 a week, or however small you need to break it down. The point is not about the size of the goal. It's to feel a sense of achievement and that comes when you feel you are making progress.
When you achieve your goals, it helps to remind you that you are not helpless, that you can make decisions and that you can effect change. You did effect change. Your car was dirty and now it's clean - because of you. Some people might not think that's a big enough goal to matter, but it all matters. It also helps you feel better about yourself when you accomplish what you set out to do.
Deal with things when you get to them. Don't worry obsessively about something that has not happened, or that is not going to happen for a long time. Fear and worry contribute hugely to feeling helpless. A huge amount of the pain and stress that we as human beings experience in our lives is due to not wanting to accept the reality of how things are. We agonize over how we think things should be, or they way we would like them to be. This is understandable but it's pointless. Things are the way that they are. That's not to say we never work for change or to ascend our current circumstances but refusing to accept things the way they are is not how you get there. Stressing over not being able to control other people or situations is not how you get there, either.This is probably one of the biggest things people stress over: not being able to control other people and situations. Acceptance is realizing that you can only do what you can do. You only have control over yourself and your actions. That's all. Other people are going to do what they are going to do and that's all there is to it. They are going to think what they are going to think, they are going to believe what they are going to believe and there's nothing you can do about any of it except live your truth and be responsible for your own behavior. Everything else is out of your control.
There is no point in stressing over things you cannot change. This includes the past, it includes the present and it includes the future.
challenge your thinking to understand what your own motivations are. By looking at your own real-life situations in this way, you can challenge your thinking to understand what your own motivations are. The reasons behind the reasons, in other words.
Worrying about something never made it any easier. That can actually induce a type of fear paralysis, where someone psyches themselves out of doing anything at all. Consider the outcomes of what you are doing and prepare for them as best you can, but don't borrow trouble. Deal with things when they happen. Just because you think something is going to happen a certain way doesn't mean it will, and even if it does, you can handle it. You're not as fragile as you think you are, or are afraid you are. Write down a few goals for yourself, They can be daily, weekly, monthly, a one time thing, whatever you want to do. They can be anything you want and keep them them where you will see them and be reminded that you are not helpless and that you are absolutely capable of doing these things.
the ego can cause many problems for people if it is not tempered with logic and maturity. The ego believes it is the center of everything. To that end, it wants to believe that everything that happens to the self or around the self is because of the self. The ego is emotional and sees things in absolutes: I won. I lost. I succeeded. I failed. I was right. I was wrong. This is bad. That is good. Avoiding the ego trap is very important.
There are so many things, from the big to the small, for which to practice gratitude. If you ate today, you can be grateful you ate, because so many didn't. If you didn't eat, you can be grateful you can breath when so many others cannot. Every day we are alive and walking around on this earth is a day to practice gratitude. There are so many amazing things about life and living. If someone only ever focuses on what they don't have and what they can't do, they will always be unhappy. There is always something you can't do. There will always be things you don't have. If you can learn to be happy with what you already have, everything else is a bonus.
Good insights! You should write this up as an article and share it 😊🙏🏻
This is really powerful content, Daniel, and spot on. I enjoyed listening to this. I especially appreciated and valued how you mentioned the evolution of personal development into a sort of distorted and toxic space. These "fake gurus" can really lead people astray - which is why the awareness you raised in this video is excellent.
Thanks Jeff, yes it’s something I’ve been trying to put into words for a few years and I finally felt I could explain it. Glad to hear that it resonated for you! I appreciate your feedback and support as always! 😊🙏🏻
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😊🙏🏻
Thank you for sharing this video 😊
You got it! Hope that it helps you! 🙏🏻😊
Great one Dan ! 😎
Thank you my friend! 😊🙏🏻
Very interesting and different approach to self-development that I have never thought of or come across. This is coming from a self-improvement "junkie" who constantly consumes self-improvement related content daily for the past several years. Also, love to hear perspectives from individuals who are older than me (I'm 27) because life experience cannot be taught, only lived. Great stuff
Thankyou!! Glad that it was insightful (from one self improvement junkie to another) 😊🙏🏻
Thank you
You got it! 🙏🏻😊