Ogres are the Best Warhammer Race to Live As

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  • Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
  • I watched the Ogre trailer for TWIII so many times I developed Stockholm Syndrome.
    Vore for the Vore God.
    Support the channel! (If you can and are feeling incredibly generous please don't feel obligated)
    / @pancreasnowork9939
    Music:
    Kevin MacLead:
    -Thatched Villagers
    -Folk Round
    -Minstrel Guild

Комментарии • 1,5 тыс.

  • @pancreasnowork9939
    @pancreasnowork9939  2 года назад +2318

    First

  • @LordProteus
    @LordProteus 2 года назад +3511

    "Ogres are often considered as thick as two planks, but smart enough to nail those two planks together and beat the observer to death with them." ~ Ogre Kingdoms Army Book.

    • @seekingabsolution1907
      @seekingabsolution1907 2 года назад

      Sounds great no formalized class structure or economic exploitation for Ogres. They are at least for the moment immune to capitalism. Dumb enough that they're difficult to manipulate into wage slavery, strong enough that they're difficult to force militarily into any form of slavery.

    • @carrotstew5279
      @carrotstew5279 2 года назад +247

      I maybe and idiot but I'm not stupid
      -ogre

    • @ToaArcan
      @ToaArcan Год назад +99

      And then they eat the observer.

    • @hunterv9983
      @hunterv9983 Год назад +27

      ​@@ToaArcan
      Raw.

    • @brainfreezzzze6900
      @brainfreezzzze6900 Год назад +34

      Wez not animas
      Pulls out cooking pot
      Getz da butcha we eatsin good tonight!

  • @jonahlazer2076
    @jonahlazer2076 2 года назад +3306

    Ogres are the pure embodiment of the typo "Morbidly-A Beast"

  • @bloodbornduck9536
    @bloodbornduck9536 2 года назад +3719

    Kislev: Our God is dying! We must rescue him lest our motherland perish
    Cathay: Ursun knows of the location of our long lost sister. We must rescue him so we can find our loving sibling and bring harmony to our family
    Chaos daemon factions: The corpse of a god! Such power can be ours for the taking and be used to defeat our rivals
    Ogres: GET IN MY BELLY!!!

    • @Brotherbear-er7rn
      @Brotherbear-er7rn 2 года назад +99

      You literally can’t not read that in fat bastard’s voice

    • @valonreijk7393
      @valonreijk7393 2 года назад +170

      BEAR MEAT!!!

    • @flapjack279
      @flapjack279 2 года назад +195

      @@valonreijk7393
      "You get ONE DROP thats it. The rest is mine!"

    • @salgoragarus5854
      @salgoragarus5854 2 года назад +102

      ROAST GOD RIBS

    • @jackmclean4120
      @jackmclean4120 2 года назад +69

      ''YE WEE LITTLE MAN!''

  • @TheMeatMan
    @TheMeatMan 2 года назад +4945

    This is literally the "return to monke" argument.
    "The revolution was a mistake."
    "You mean the Industrial revolution?"
    "No.. Agricultural."

    • @JacoDeltaco
      @JacoDeltaco 2 года назад +4

      yes but they cover the original argument flaw by being dumb

    • @Ben_c-j4u
      @Ben_c-j4u 2 года назад +294

      Times were good back them
      No taxes
      Good natural food
      No dead end job

    • @emiliianoportillo1311
      @emiliianoportillo1311 2 года назад +150

      You would probably get mauled by a lion, but SO. everything gets mauled by something bigger

    • @minhducnguyen9276
      @minhducnguyen9276 2 года назад +133

      40K Orks took it further. No agriculture but still industrial. And there is only one industry for Orks, war industry.

    • @behr2197
      @behr2197 2 года назад +42

      @@minhducnguyen9276 don't they cultivate fungus and raise squigs

  • @the_inquisitive_inquisitor
    @the_inquisitive_inquisitor 2 года назад +1654

    I've been pissed off for three days because my roommate ate a steak I left in the fridge.
    I understand Ogre.

    • @chesterstevens8870
      @chesterstevens8870 2 года назад +142

      Challenge his to a guts-out duel, if you win you get to disembowel him and eat the steak he stole from you.

    • @the_inquisitive_inquisitor
      @the_inquisitive_inquisitor 2 года назад +42

      @@chesterstevens8870 lol at this point I'm pretty sure I don't want *that* steak anymore...

    • @GarkKahn
      @GarkKahn 2 года назад +51

      @@the_inquisitive_inquisitor fine. More steak FOR US!

    • @the_inquisitive_inquisitor
      @the_inquisitive_inquisitor 2 года назад +6

      @@GarkKahn By now I'm POSITIVE that not even the lowest - most down bad - Ogre wants to eat THAT steak...

    • @antonh1159
      @antonh1159 2 года назад

      You bastard don’t deserve that steak if youre going to desecrate it by placing it in a fridge

  • @ethangriffin3935
    @ethangriffin3935 2 года назад +1317

    I will say that Ogres, while not especially smart, aren't necessarily complete fools. They've got this weird kind of low cunning that is kinda scary when you consider how fucking huge they are.

    • @Stolskai
      @Stolskai 2 года назад +258

      In my opinion Its more that they are so commonly seen as stupid that when one has a intelligent thought it comes at much bigger of a surprise, which is why ogres like Goldtooth became such powerful figures

    • @brok56
      @brok56 2 года назад +178

      They got cannon sized flintlock shotguns. That is quite smart.
      Also they Cook a lot of stuff in different ways, Who knows, maybe they are really really good chefs.
      I mean they spend all their time cooking and eating, surely some of them master The Art of cooking To make eating More wonderful.

    • @kriegjaeger
      @kriegjaeger 2 года назад +4

      They're the only race dumber than orks who should never be underestimated.
      Their idea of a brilliant sun tzu plan was to cause a stampede of their pack animals towards the enemy army, and most of their commanders didn't get even that.

    • @robosoldier11
      @robosoldier11 2 года назад +55

      @@brok56 assumedly they have other people make those if your referring to the pistols the maneaters use. In so far as the cannons they steal are concerned. I'm sure a clever enough ogre can figure out how to make one if shown how. Which ya know for an Ogre how hard is it to kidnap a Dwarf or Human smith?

    • @calebbarnhouse496
      @calebbarnhouse496 2 года назад

      @@robosoldier11 not hard to get a dwarf or human Smith, but a human smith likely wouldn't have the knowledge to make a cannon, and certainly not a safe one while the dwarf would just start reading off grudges they gave him just for the kidnapping, seriously dwarf slaves to the dark elves are treated (fairly) well because they just aren't willing to serve them unless they feel like it, they can be worth the price of buildings for a dwarf that won't commit sucide just so he doesn't help an elf, but even if they were willing to help ogres don't mine, so they only have scrap metal, not metal able to be made into a cannon, nor anyplace to get a fire hot enough to melt enough to fill in the cannons mold

  • @BossEvasion
    @BossEvasion 2 года назад +4311

    Even the Elf Simp accepts that Ogres are living the best life.

    • @something3530
      @something3530 2 года назад +166

      I go as 40k orks not gonna lie

    • @filipem4221
      @filipem4221 2 года назад +55

      @@something3530 a good choice as well

    • @allman28
      @allman28 2 года назад +63

      @@something3530 orks in 40k have really good lives

    • @victorrosenheart8036
      @victorrosenheart8036 2 года назад +11

      Could I have sex with Elves while being an Ogre?

    • @philipgodsworth4764
      @philipgodsworth4764 2 года назад +68

      @@victorrosenheart8036 elves are built for ogre harem buffet hybrids.

  • @CrazyTom736
    @CrazyTom736 2 года назад +2251

    There is one somewhat miserable ogre: Bragg the Gutsman. A dude whose whole schtick is that he'll be welcomed into any tribe because of what a badass he is, but because his fighting style involves using a hook on a chain to either slice off his opponent's heads or cut into an ogre's gut and reel out his innards like a fisherman, will never stay welcome. Stomach wounds are almost a taboo in ogre culture, and are the only real injury they fear - not only is an ogre's gut so massive that it can take hours or even days for the innards to completely spill out and the ogre to finally die, but it's also his connection to the Great Maw, and in losing it, he loses his god's favour right before he goes to meet him. Imagine an agonisingly slow, painful death that also guarantees you damnation - one your civilisation's medicine isn't advanced enough to save you from. Bragg doesn't know why, he doesn't even necessarily want to do it, but he's compelled to deliver such a death any time an ogre challenges him to a fight. And so, he will be exiled from another tribe, forcing him to wander the mountains as a lone executioner.

    • @jhonnoilcringeincarnato8593
      @jhonnoilcringeincarnato8593 2 года назад +341

      Also ogre guts are the weakest part of their body this is why they always wear a gutplate

    • @CrazyTom736
      @CrazyTom736 2 года назад +388

      @@jhonnoilcringeincarnato8593 Yeah, armoursmiths are rare in ogre society which is why most don't wear that much armour, but they're so terrified of gut injuries that they'll prioritise that gutplate over anything else. If you can't guard anything else, you guard the gut. Butchers are the exception here, since their faith in the Great Maw means they trust it to protect them instead. Greasus seems to as well, presumably as a bit of a power play - maybe because of his faith in his own destiny, maybe as a "come and try it if you think you're hard enough" sort of deal.

    • @jhonnoilcringeincarnato8593
      @jhonnoilcringeincarnato8593 2 года назад +197

      @@CrazyTom736 it should be noted that outside of gut the rest of the ogre's body is as durable as most materials used to make armor soo if it can penetrate an ogre it can easily pass through most forms of armour anyway to the ogres any other piece of armor besides the gutplate is purely cosmetic

    • @vknight7497
      @vknight7497 2 года назад +13

      Did you like… just make all this up for a few people on RUclips to enjoy?

    • @Gauge-lo2bp
      @Gauge-lo2bp 2 года назад +119

      @@vknight7497 it would have taken you 7 seconds to google it and find out otherwise

  • @noahtekulve2684
    @noahtekulve2684 2 года назад +4194

    You can replace every instance of "Ogre" with "Ork", and "eating" with "fightin", and the video is still correct.

    • @st0mp331
      @st0mp331 2 года назад +513

      @G K Orks feel very little pain, furthermore death in battle for an ork is a death doing what they love. A shorter life isnt necessarily a worse one.

    • @AFAndersen
      @AFAndersen 2 года назад +204

      They even have the same concept of defending what is important.. Ogres armor their belly.. Orks protect their teef!

    • @saucevc8353
      @saucevc8353 2 года назад +101

      @G K An Ork doesn't care if they die. If it gave them a good fight it's good enough for them and they can die happy.

    • @TheBembp
      @TheBembp 2 года назад +80

      @G K ok, so it's a bad faith concept, let's go.
      The issue with ogres is that they have to stop eating to fight, risking getting wounded or killed in order to eat more.
      Orks can fight just in order to have more fight, and this is good. Wound dont mean much, dying while fighting is a victory...
      Dang they even evolve from fighting to fight more. Does ogres evolve to eat more? I don't think so.
      The only true fear an ork would experience, is the proximity of a dok.

    • @rev0568
      @rev0568 2 года назад +52

      @G K The orks literally die happy if its in combat and laugh at their comrades dying in battle. An ork dying or being hurt is not a downside, to them or their enemies.

  • @jewishdictionary1715
    @jewishdictionary1715 2 года назад +3651

    'Ate the empire
    'Ate the elves
    'Ate the orks
    'Ate the demons
    Simple as.

  • @gen.skeleskin1428
    @gen.skeleskin1428 2 года назад +576

    Him: doesn’t pick dwarves as first or second favorite race to live as
    Dwarves: in the book it goes

    • @mortemtyrannus8813
      @mortemtyrannus8813 2 года назад +78

      You: even consider placing dwarves as second in that list
      Dwarves: "That's going in the book!"

    • @hz.kemalpasa2997
      @hz.kemalpasa2997 2 года назад +5

      Having a book of people who was mean to you? That's some small pp energy right there. Be an ogre, don't hate what you ate.

    • @kaidothedrunkard
      @kaidothedrunkard 2 года назад +39

      "Sounds like a 'Ting dat needs to be eatin'."
      Said the Gigachad Ogre

    • @Briselance
      @Briselance 2 года назад +5

      @@mortemtyrannus8813
      Eh. I prefer elves, anyway.

    • @jmgonzales7701
      @jmgonzales7701 Год назад +1

      @@Briselance i prefer dwarves

  • @greasy_breads
    @greasy_breads 2 года назад +1075

    look at how much fucking fun those ogres are having in the trailer. singing with their mates, watching ogres fight, being given what is probably a FREE ALL YOU CAN EAT by their lord greasus whos feeding his boys so they can be nice and happy and healthy and MASSIVE for the next raid.

    • @brok56
      @brok56 2 года назад +131

      And when they get bored, they just group up, go out and have a fun brawl with some neighbours, bring what they can carry back home and start eating and singing again.
      The best life possible.

    • @Grudgin
      @Grudgin 2 года назад +67

      Pub night with the lads have never been a playable faction until now

    • @markusallen6818
      @markusallen6818 2 года назад +16

      Honestly I don't think ogres could survive on any less than an all you can eat

    • @shadefelblade
      @shadefelblade 2 года назад +20

      CRUNCHIN' AN' BITIN' WE KILL FOR THE MAW THE POWER AND GRUB'S WHAT WE'RE DOIN' IT FORRRRRRR

    • @sev1120
      @sev1120 Год назад +4

      Hell, many ogres make permanent residence outside of the mountains of mourn, and they still make pilgrimages back to the maw on occasion. And they're not ostracised by other ogres!

  • @andrewnewell1142
    @andrewnewell1142 2 года назад +553

    Eating and fighting, that’s the way. Also inventing ketchup.

    • @Haispawner
      @Haispawner 2 года назад +10

      Orcs do the exact same, but are more fight than eating oriented.
      Warhammer Fantasy orcs eat people alive.

    • @loowick4074
      @loowick4074 2 года назад +17

      Sorry ain't one for fruint n veg

    • @shipkipsamazingchannel3248
      @shipkipsamazingchannel3248 2 года назад +11

      I love that event so much

    • @nidnoms3622
      @nidnoms3622 2 года назад +1

      i laughed hard at that in Total Warhammer 3, i actually wonder what Ogre Ketchup tastes like

    • @mistergrosbig4085
      @mistergrosbig4085 2 года назад +2

      @@loowick4074 Ye ne’d balanced diet. Keepz poop soft like a gnoblar pillow

  • @nogitsune4452
    @nogitsune4452 2 года назад +744

    I dunno why but I find your delivery and views of simple ogre life to be hilarious.
    Other bonus to being an Ogre is that there's no real health and beauty standard besides maybe get a bigger gut. Feeling overweight? GOOD! Eat more of what you like!

    • @shipkipsamazingchannel3248
      @shipkipsamazingchannel3248 2 года назад +114

      They do actually have a standard and it's to be the fastest bastard possible. Being called slim is a common insult used by ogres to mock other races who does posses the same prodigious guts they do.

    • @wolfmanhcc
      @wolfmanhcc 2 года назад +31

      Don't forget to drink your weight

    • @Ake-TL
      @Ake-TL 2 года назад +24

      They literally discard ugly and unhealthy babies in the caves

    • @adriaanschoombie8573
      @adriaanschoombie8573 2 года назад +19

      @@Ake-TL and those become gorgers if i'm not mistaken.

    • @Gekk-rx7nv
      @Gekk-rx7nv 2 года назад +5

      But they still need to be fast enough to be the first to get to the table

  • @dank_smirk2ndchannel200
    @dank_smirk2ndchannel200 2 года назад +185

    "The Ogres were born a long time ago
    Big, strong, and fat
    The little round ones by our side
    We ate and drank till our guts filled"
    "Then came the plains and the tribes
    Beasts, sun, grass, wind, earth
    The Sunrisers gave us fire
    We fought for them and ate their young"
    "A great toothed comet came
    It grew closer by the day
    Fire roared in the sky
    Killed the night and drove the beasts mad"
    "The Maw was born from the fire
    The earth shook at its coming
    The flames ate many tribes
    To the mountains some fled"
    "The War in the Sky began
    They were strong and tall
    But the Ogres were many
    We ground their bones in their halls"
    "The hungry flame sat in our guts
    We ate the mountains to put it out
    But the fire was still there
    We climbed further still"
    "We ate the Tall Ones' herds
    Cavebeast is good meat
    We climbed the peaks
    Above the skies where the giants dwell"
    "There was magic in the peaks
    Some were born sickly and fierce
    Some changed into ice beasts
    The rest followed the sun"
    "The giant-fest lasted many moons
    But it is not good above the cloud sea
    We toppled their castles
    We threw them down into the skies"
    "The sun took us to deep valleys
    Below the cloud sea
    The world looked small
    We would take it and eat"
    "Little ones came from the hills
    Green of skin and useful
    They were too stringy to eat
    We put them to work"
    "The thinlings came in great wheel huts
    We ate them and took the shiny things
    They gave us small metal suns
    Bad to eat but good for trade"
    "The new mountains gave shelter
    We made fire in their mouths
    We killed many beasts
    The tribes grew well"
    The tribes split the lands
    The Tyrants roared and fought
    There were many kingdoms
    It was good for many winters"
    "The tribes grew and grew too much
    Now we follow the sun once more"
    - traditional saga of the Ogres, as depicted on many cave walls throughout the Ogre Kingdoms, and interpreted by the notoriously untrustworthy Marienburg trader Yohan the Honest. Rumour has it that he and his entourage were eaten when he tried to cheat the Angry Fist Tribe.

  • @erikvale3194
    @erikvale3194 2 года назад +418

    I was going to point out that ogres are always hungry, not content, because of parasitic magic influence, but you've convinced me you've thought this through.

    • @heuvelke1065
      @heuvelke1065 2 года назад +23

      There are actual people with this problem and you dont see them unhappy. Just chubby as hell.

    • @papajavaleri
      @papajavaleri 2 года назад +8

      @@heuvelke1065 There are exactly 0 people like that in real world.

    • @Ben_c-j4u
      @Ben_c-j4u 2 года назад +28

      @@papajavaleri what about Tarrare
      Of course I wouldn't say he was exactly happy

    • @awkwardbound569
      @awkwardbound569 2 года назад +8

      @@heuvelke1065 I can confirm, I am a person with a parasitic magic influence

    • @heuvelke1065
      @heuvelke1065 2 года назад

      @@papajavaleri well you never met a fat chinese person that believes a shark fin gives him eternal youth then Hahah zero my ass.

  • @thekinginyellowhastur9244
    @thekinginyellowhastur9244 2 года назад +507

    In my mind i was thinking it in the back of my head, but im glad the ogres are making waves again. Theyre just vibin

  • @capriciouscat6679
    @capriciouscat6679 2 года назад +273

    Ogres are even chaos resistant if I remember correctly, both as a physical trait in that they are fairly protected against mutation, and in the fact that even though there are chaos ogres, they're with chaos more because their goals of killing and eating stuff aligns well with chaos invasions rather than any real sense of worship or corruption by the ruinous powers.

    • @Bacillus4
      @Bacillus4 2 года назад +57

      You are right, they were created by the Old Ones to be the ultimate weapon against Chaos so they are very much Chaos resistant.

    • @SkarsnikofdaCrookedMoon0013
      @SkarsnikofdaCrookedMoon0013 2 года назад +11

      They can mutate nonetheless. And just as Norscans, they accept mutated ogres no problem.

    • @Predator20357
      @Predator20357 2 года назад +18

      @@Bacillus4 Sadly they aren’t basically the Absolute Chads because someone stopped them half way. Basically we nearly got the equivalent of Sigmarines for Fantasy.

    • @creed8712
      @creed8712 2 года назад +2

      @@Bacillus4 so they are really like the fantasy version of 40k Orks

    • @Luckmann
      @Luckmann 2 года назад +22

      Like halflings, they have an innate resistance to Chaos, further enhanced by their simple-minded nature - the latter which is why orcs are also surprisingly resistant to Chaos.
      Like someone said, though, they mutate just fine, and have no problems with their mutated kin.

  • @sweaty4334
    @sweaty4334 2 года назад +834

    This is why we need a ogre mercenary in Vermintide 2 or 3 if we ever get a sequel

    • @MyViolador
      @MyViolador 2 года назад +82

      well in Darktide you can Play as an Ogryn, its the closest we gonna get for now

    • @philipkelly7369
      @philipkelly7369 2 года назад +56

      *squeakquel

    • @BizarreM
      @BizarreM 2 года назад +44

      I don't think Lohner would be able to feed him during downtime, but this is fixable with 'um rat eatin'

    • @chene-aurelgaudreau1072
      @chene-aurelgaudreau1072 2 года назад +67

      Rat ogres are a lot less intimidating when you’re almost as big as they are.

    • @jhonnoilcringeincarnato8593
      @jhonnoilcringeincarnato8593 2 года назад +49

      @@chene-aurelgaudreau1072 and your equivalent of a shotgun is a fucking cannon that may or may not come from a destroyed human/dwarf castle

  • @rosaryenjoyer739
    @rosaryenjoyer739 2 года назад +101

    "People" of Brettonia is one of the funniest lines I have ever heard

    • @mortemtyrannus8813
      @mortemtyrannus8813 2 года назад +15

      I'm reminded of Mandalore's TWWH2 review when describing Brettonia: "You have the French, but they're honorable."

  • @Burgerzaza
    @Burgerzaza 2 года назад +304

    I was happy when they announced ogres for warhammer 3, it feels good to finally be getting representation in the setting

  • @deathridesabike5619
    @deathridesabike5619 2 года назад +185

    I feel like ogres and at least 40k Orks are living their best life. 40k Orks love war and in the universe where there is only war, then it's pure bliss.

  • @dank_smirk2ndchannel200
    @dank_smirk2ndchannel200 Год назад +164

    6:54 "They hear humans complain about how Chaos has once again razed and ruined their lands, and they just don’t understand the problem."
    Idk. Seems pretty easy for them to understand.
    Peasant farmer: "Chaos has burnt my farm to the ground."
    Ogre: "Okay, and?"
    Peasant farmer: "Farms are where the best food comes from."
    Ogre: *almost has a heart attack from sheer grief*

    • @thelordofthelostbraincells
      @thelordofthelostbraincells 6 месяцев назад +16

      Bro thank you!!!
      Its as simple as saying "DEMONS KEEP DESTROYING ALL THE FOOD!!!" and th oger would get it

    • @dank_smirk2ndchannel200
      @dank_smirk2ndchannel200 6 месяцев назад +25

      @@thelordofthelostbraincells Ye. "Daemons destroyed the food. Go kill Daemons so that they stop destroying the food."

    • @thelordofthelostbraincells
      @thelordofthelostbraincells 6 месяцев назад

      @@dank_smirk2ndchannel200 *SIMPLE AS*

    • @devinward461
      @devinward461 4 месяца назад +7

      ​@@dank_smirk2ndchannel200 and eat the daemons while you're at it!

  • @ColonelMetus
    @ColonelMetus 2 года назад +169

    Did you notice that literally every single Butcher has lost their leg to Diabetes?

    • @sicksock435446
      @sicksock435446 2 года назад +79

      A butchers job is to feed the tribe. Not surprising to see some implied auto cannibalism.

    • @InquisitorThomas
      @InquisitorThomas 2 года назад +42

      @@sicksock435446 Yeah honestly I would be surprised if it was possible for an Ogre to get Diabetes.

    • @thelordofthelostbraincells
      @thelordofthelostbraincells 3 месяца назад

      ​@@InquisitorThomas ogres have super insulin.
      They're diabetic proof

  • @frumentariidegenerate3515
    @frumentariidegenerate3515 2 года назад +134

    Ogres have LAYERS...
    -Shrek-chan, probably

  • @ragingraider889
    @ragingraider889 2 года назад +135

    The moment I learned of the Ogres' existence I was like: "They're so cool" and now, knowing how their culture works much like that of 40k Orks but instead of fighting it's eating, I agree with you whole heartedly: Ogres and Orks are the best races to live as.
    Ignorance is bliss, after all. And god knows that the races of 40k could use all the non-chaos bliss they can get.

    • @MrMyers758
      @MrMyers758 2 года назад +1

      I mean there are Orcs in Warhammer Fantasy too. Arguably it is better to live as an Orc because the only thing that gives you pleasure is always available to you freely. Orcs just want to fight, and as long as there is another orc nearby (as there always is) you are guaranteed to be able to have a fight. Ogres can't guarantee a meal at a moments notice, and have to fight just to get it with no guarantee of success. An orc gets what he wants in a fight whether he wins or loses, and if he wants a fight he can just start one and get instant satisfaction and fun.

    • @Briselance
      @Briselance 2 года назад

      Ogres and Orks, best races to live as? They are nothing but one-track minded simpletons. Outside of eating for the Ogres and fighting for the Orks, they simply don't exist, they are bland. Besides that, they have nothing to their names and are unable to evolve in anything.
      So... well, no. Apex stupids. Worst races to live as.

    • @thejuiceking2219
      @thejuiceking2219 10 месяцев назад

      what about the Sons of Behemat?

  • @mrpizzacat8273
    @mrpizzacat8273 2 года назад +382

    While I wouldn’t be down for the whole eating sentient races thing, getting paid in meat and a bit of coin while spending the rest of my days vibing without many issues that can’t be solved by sitting on them does sound nice. I’d miss the internet though

    • @fonzieayyy3875
      @fonzieayyy3875 2 года назад +55

      Best part is you don't have to eat other races

    • @MyViolador
      @MyViolador 2 года назад +58

      you could just be an ogre merc or hunter and not eat "smart" races

    • @Bluecho4
      @Bluecho4 2 года назад +41

      My thinking is that, if you're going to be thrown into any Warhammer setting (none of which have Internet) anyway, you might as well go for the one with the best upside. And arguably, Ogres have that best upside.

    • @bluelax99able
      @bluelax99able 2 года назад +5

      @@Bluecho4 yeah not many things can Krump an ogre and if it can it ain't common

    • @HamburgerHat1
      @HamburgerHat1 2 года назад +14

      you arent vibing without many issues. every ogre feels a constant insatiable hunger until they die. an ogre is never content, they always need more.

  • @dovahkiin_brasil
    @dovahkiin_brasil 2 года назад +73

    I love ogres because canonically they are the peak performance of the old ones creation

  • @THEMEATMANOG
    @THEMEATMANOG 2 года назад +64

    The right opinion. The knife ear simp embraces the loving embrace of the Great Maw

  • @pdthepowerdragon5412
    @pdthepowerdragon5412 2 года назад +217

    Greasus Goldtooth is the best standard of Warhammer living. Unlimited food, unlimited money, unlimited fun

    • @Thedudeofdudes810
      @Thedudeofdudes810 Год назад +12

      all while drifting on his foes

    • @Spartan135
      @Spartan135 Год назад +3

      more like: all noble bastards from a 40k hive city,while the rest fights over a half eaten ration bar someone has found in a dumpster,except the ogres have enough food for the entire day.

  • @Okoii
    @Okoii 2 года назад +49

    Ogres are the true kings of the Warhammer universe, it is known. Great vid

  • @BryanMinami
    @BryanMinami 2 года назад +81

    Other Race : we will dominate this world
    Ogres : Thinking what a next meal to eat with mindset like Gordon ramsay

    • @deep1umbra
      @deep1umbra 2 года назад

      Every idiot (everyone not an ogre) is a sandwich!

    • @kaidothedrunkard
      @kaidothedrunkard 2 года назад

      Gordon Ramsay is a Skinny Ogre

    • @WorshipperOfKhone
      @WorshipperOfKhone 2 года назад +7

      *"Hm I do say this human flesh you have cooked is by far the best I've ever tasted. I do say that you put an excellent amount of spices with it that brings out a certain flavor. Now if you would pardon me I shall return to my cabin to rest and possibly eat one of my goblins, would you care to join me?"*

    • @MrcreepyZero
      @MrcreepyZero Год назад +5

      ​@@WorshipperOfKhone I am now picturing an ogre food critic traveling from tribe to tribe to find out which one has the most delicious ogre cuisine.

    • @SMG-vx3mu
      @SMG-vx3mu 3 месяца назад

      @@MrcreepyZero some ogre screaming "WERE IZ DAH LAMB SAUSE!?!"

  • @barleysixseventwo6665
    @barleysixseventwo6665 2 года назад +341

    "My Friend asked me if I'd rather be a Russian Soldier in WW1 or live in the world of Attack On Titan. Obviously the correct answer here is suicide by any means possible."
    The fact the picture you used includes Reiner the suicidal yet terminally unkillable just makes this joke even funnier.

    • @theloremandraws3753
      @theloremandraws3753 2 года назад +18

      Oh wait. I didn’t even realize that! That’s great

  • @bjornancraite2266
    @bjornancraite2266 2 года назад +58

    Ogres and Orks definitely have the most fun in Warhammer.

  • @gudboah4688
    @gudboah4688 2 года назад +398

    Ogres, excuse me, OGORS in AOS are pretty similar, but the Beastclaw tribes are a bit less fortunate then the Gutbuster tribes. While the Gutbuster tribes are basically the same as the Ogre tribes in fantasy, the Beastclaw raiders have to worry about the Everwinter: a massive, never ending blizzard that constantly follows them, and is pretty much their god.

    • @Bluecho4
      @Bluecho4 2 года назад +76

      On the plus side, they're easily the most democratic faction in AoS. Because Beastclaw Raiders choose their war leader by having all the contenders go on a huge hunt. Other ogres flock to the side of the one whose pile of food is largest. Ogres are single-issue voters, and the ones who does best for his constituents gets the biggest popular support.

    • @anonymysable
      @anonymysable 2 года назад +27

      @@Bluecho4 When a bunch of fat bastards followed by a big cold cloud is more democratic than the usa voting system

    • @alaljarensi6990
      @alaljarensi6990 2 года назад +27

      @@anonymysable No. We operate more like the Skaven Council of 13 and the opposing clans, I mean parties.

    • @7fatrats
      @7fatrats 2 года назад +2

      @@anonymysable i mean if you think about it, we are fat bastards followed by the fog of war

    • @whitecreamymilk8436
      @whitecreamymilk8436 2 года назад +13

      @@anonymysable and their politicians actually help and care Bout em too.

  • @phylippezimmermannpaquin2062
    @phylippezimmermannpaquin2062 2 года назад +64

    you know, ogres would probably have the best pancreases of all the races

  • @alanolex3962
    @alanolex3962 2 года назад +255

    Started with Kairos Fateweaver. Khorne immediately bullied me.
    Starting to see where you're coming from.

    • @wastrelperv
      @wastrelperv 2 года назад +3

      Get bullied nerd.

    • @crim1188
      @crim1188 2 года назад +7

      How the hell. Kairos shits on khorne factions

    • @HiddenEvilStudios
      @HiddenEvilStudios 2 года назад

      That's what you get, nerd.

  • @lilvalko5096
    @lilvalko5096 2 года назад +261

    this man spitting straight facts, anyone else who says otherwise is a hatter. i believe in ogre supremacy

    • @Bluecho4
      @Bluecho4 2 года назад +6

      Pretty sure you meant "hater", but I enjoy the idea of insulting someone by calling them a hat-maker.

    • @weaponizedlizardmen360
      @weaponizedlizardmen360 2 года назад +13

      @@Bluecho4 Hey now, the Maneaters that visit the empire love the hat makers. You see how big and floofy their hats are? Them ogres want them to. And boy do they get the biggest and most bombastics hats out there.

    • @xyro3633
      @xyro3633 2 года назад +5

      A mad hatter?

    • @PhilosophicallyAmerican
      @PhilosophicallyAmerican 2 года назад +4

      @Bluecho4 Hatters used to go mad do to chemical exposure in the hat making process. So either way works

    • @Briselance
      @Briselance 2 года назад

      You believe in Ogre supremacy? 🤣 Meh. Supremacy in what? Being of a one-track mind? Being unable to do anything too thorough besides eating? And not being the brightest bulbs? Plus they are morbidly obese and disfigured.

  • @worthlessclericbuild3866
    @worthlessclericbuild3866 2 года назад +129

    This is great, but please, I never want to hear the phrase
    “Vore the chaos invaders.”
    I don’t want to slannesh to be summoned into my living room again.

    • @Pyrela
      @Pyrela 2 года назад +4

      Could be worse. Could be anal vore.

    • @whitecreamymilk8436
      @whitecreamymilk8436 2 года назад +4

      It's ok. They're chaos resistant. They can vore, war, sick, and trick all day without feeding the gods.

    • @bruvaguren494
      @bruvaguren494 2 года назад +11

      Again?

    • @worthlessclericbuild3866
      @worthlessclericbuild3866 2 года назад +29

      @@bruvaguren494 yeah again. Mind your own fucking business we all make mistakes in the heat of passion sometimes

    • @Ashoka...232
      @Ashoka...232 2 года назад +3

      @@worthlessclericbuild3866 I... I need to know what mistake could do that. If only so that I might avoid it myself.

  • @mrbluesky853
    @mrbluesky853 Год назад +10

    Chaos invasion.
    Most of the Old World: End Times!
    Ogres: Takeaway!

  • @MagusMirificus
    @MagusMirificus 2 года назад +71

    Restricting this question to 40K I long ago came to the conclusion that the only sensible choice would be the Orcs, so I am sympathetic to this argument.

    • @MrTux-tw4ld
      @MrTux-tw4ld 2 года назад +6

      I mean the tyrannids got no real complaints

    • @Pred.
      @Pred. 2 года назад +6

      There are ogryns, not sure what they really do though, I have heard some are just chill big af bodyguards for nobles in imperium society

    • @edim108
      @edim108 2 года назад +5

      @@Pred. They're a subspecies of human. Basically 40K Ogres, but less hungry and somehow even dumber.
      They're large and ridiculously strong- an adult Ogryn can rip a Space Marine limb from limb if he gets a grab of them.
      The Imperial Guard often uses them as shock troops- give them some armor and a club and they'll rip through lines of infantry in no time.
      But they are downright retarded. Like, an average ORK is more intelligent than most Ogryns.
      If an Ogryn can speak in short sentences and count to five, that's considered genius level by Ogryn standards.

    • @aldiascholarofthefirstsin1051
      @aldiascholarofthefirstsin1051 2 года назад +1

      @@MrTux-tw4ld
      Your brain matter and body spends 89% of your time inside a biomass pool until the hivemind needs you to work your ass off at some random planet, the only fun part of it is that you get to eat all day, in the normal sense and maybe in the hentai sense.

    • @Taniks_The_Undying
      @Taniks_The_Undying 2 года назад +1

      @@aldiascholarofthefirstsin1051 so what's the problem from you description i basically lazy around and when the guys asks me to do something is something fun to do

  • @pancake4061
    @pancake4061 2 года назад +54

    I'd be down to be an Ork. Bored? Go break or fight something. Scared? No you're not. You'll just be reborn as soon as you die. Chaos? You're completely immune to its influences and the demons are just more things you can fight. That, and the sky is literally the limit. If enough of your friends think you're right, you are. No pesky problems like universal laws or mechanics to get in your way. Throwing pebbles at Imperial Knights doesn't turn them to ash? All it takes is one Ork to start bragging about destroying one like that and soon enough, boom. That's just how it is now and nobody can do anything about it.

    • @Xbox_HonorGuard_Ra
      @Xbox_HonorGuard_Ra 2 года назад +11

      Good Fink is a hell of a thing. Think your armor is too weak? Paint it green and enough of the boys see it, shells will start bouncing away. You get called slow? Add some red and suddenly you get faster. Need to be sneaky? Add black. Gork and Mork supposedly talk to their boys and will point them toward the nearest fight. The Ork gods actually CARE.

    • @brianjones9780
      @brianjones9780 Год назад +6

      also their economy is easy as hell to take advantage of. paint some rocks yellow and now you're rich

  • @shipkipsamazingchannel3248
    @shipkipsamazingchannel3248 2 года назад +147

    Now I just wish we had an Ogre faction in 40k. I know their would be overlap into the orks and tyrannids but it would funny as hell to see a giant 12ft tall tub of lard break a space marine like a crab leg and eat all the juicy bits.

    • @erikvale3194
      @erikvale3194 2 года назад +41

      I mean, there are Ogryn, who are less hungry Ogres.
      Or full Kroot Tau,but they're not BIG.

    • @blaster915
      @blaster915 2 года назад +7

      That's brilliant imagery 😂

    • @apvtethic8818
      @apvtethic8818 2 года назад +3

      Imperium of Ogre with Space Ogrerines equipped with genetically enhanced bellied that can fit more food and are more resilient to damage and their leader is a huge fatass 10 meters tall ogre kept alive by machines and constantly fed with tubes and shit

    • @edge1247
      @edge1247 2 года назад +6

      I can picture Ogres nose diving Into Hive Worlds with Gluttonous glee

    • @Briselance
      @Briselance 2 года назад

      The Ogre would be dead meat before he would even get close.

  • @bidgsadge7758
    @bidgsadge7758 2 года назад +50

    I mean afterall, ignorance is a bliss, and definitely a blessing in the world like Warhammer

  • @josephdoria5237
    @josephdoria5237 2 года назад +25

    On another note, the existence of ogres like Greasus Goldtooth mean that ogres don’t necessarily have to be stupid as a rule. They’re just hungry as a rule.

    • @verylateandtired3504
      @verylateandtired3504 2 года назад +21

      I never actually saw Ogres as stupid. They totally are not. The existence of Maneaters basically proves it.
      It's more that their culture doesn't value education because it doesn't need to. That's not gonna help them get more meat. And when you are a 10 foot tall murder machine that can and will eat anything, learning the finer points of accounting or agriculture is pointless. Humans learned that stuff because that made eating easier because we are weak, soft meatsacks. Ogres didn't need to, but they have shown they can learn a lot.

    • @weaponizedlizardmen360
      @weaponizedlizardmen360 2 года назад +8

      @@verylateandtired3504 The general rule of thumb is that Ogres are dumb... but not stupid.

  • @therealfsh
    @therealfsh Год назад +9

    Hilarious that he says "How often do the ogre mercenaries hired by some orks wake up and find out skarbrand has wandered into camp"
    And then they put skarbrand in the badlands, right next to all the orks.

  • @MithritWhitebeard
    @MithritWhitebeard 9 месяцев назад +3

    Ogres are adventurous enough to fit into any culture of the world, and small minded enough to be amazed and delighted at every new thing they discover (which are immeasurably numerous)

  • @kantarell50
    @kantarell50 2 года назад +21

    You kinda failed to mention the most important thing... that they are all essentially cursed by whatever the "god" the maw is, imagine having an unending hunger that is never truely satisfied, maybe not the worst youd think but if you think about how the ogre society is almost entirerly centered around eating you can easily imagine how much power that curse holds over them.
    Being an ogre is like having a black hole in your stomach, its not as pleseant to be in their eternally snack craving shoes.

  • @gameplayadmajora4164
    @gameplayadmajora4164 2 года назад +36

    This remind me a lot of the 40k Orks and i kinda like it.
    Both (Ogres and 40k Orks) are very strong and both are too "stupid" to have a moral dilemma.
    Also both are happy for "simple" reason: Ogres love Food & Orks love War

    • @joshuafischer684
      @joshuafischer684 2 года назад +4

      It's kind of one of the major issues I have with getting too into any of the Warhammer stuff. There is almost no opportunity for virtue in the setting. Oh sure, you can fight the endless hordes of Chaos but then you immediately have to go and slaughter all the civilians on the planet because they saw Chaos.
      I get the whole appeal of 40k is "this is the worst thing you can imagine but it's still better than the alternative", but that loses its shine pretty quickly and all you're left with is endless over the top abuses (23 hour workdays on like 200 calories a day).

    • @brianjones9780
      @brianjones9780 Год назад +1

      ​@@joshuafischer684 there are still quite a number of people in the Imperium living a "good" life. Best case scenario is you live on a backwater planet and don't get picked for the draft, and not every planet is a shit hole. There are plenty that would be relatively nice to live on. It all just gets overshadowed heavily by the nonstop war and constant looming threat of Xenos and Chaos

  • @fcomolineiro7596
    @fcomolineiro7596 2 года назад +16

    Skaven: ohhhh food yes yess!
    The ogres: ohhh food
    Skaven: *what what?*

  • @Badartist888
    @Badartist888 2 года назад +36

    The Ogres are something no other faction is, genuinely happy.

    • @Sonnymets
      @Sonnymets 2 года назад +3

      Orks are happier, orks just want to fight, ogres are in a constant state of hunger due to the maw.

  • @Arei1283
    @Arei1283 Год назад +7

    “Fat shaming, what’s I got to be ashamed of, I’d like to see you skinnies take a canon ball to the gut and keep on going”

  • @abeolmedo6037
    @abeolmedo6037 2 года назад +11

    This video pleases The Great Maw.

  • @TheGuardingDark_
    @TheGuardingDark_ 2 года назад +4

    I once ate vanilla Ice cream while watching this video and now the thumbnail alone is enough to make me taste vanilla.

  • @heightnoworkchris8093
    @heightnoworkchris8093 2 года назад +9

    Why bovver with the grindin' and the bread bit I sez. Jest get strraight to the killin' an' the eating an' the money. That an' a dog onna stick...crunchy an' wiggly all at once!-Grenth Bullguts
    Excited while watching the video keep up the great work king

  • @HazzronIV
    @HazzronIV 2 года назад +7

    Imagine tho; being that one ogre who wakes up for the morning and finds out he's fighting Skarbrand today.

  • @battlebrotherb516
    @battlebrotherb516 2 года назад +13

    An ogre slayer????? I now want to make a d&d character about this. Thanks for this!

  • @LabrnMystic
    @LabrnMystic 6 месяцев назад +1

    3:19 "But who gives a damn? Not the Ogres."
    That delivery tickled me just right. 😂

  • @elevencharlie9549
    @elevencharlie9549 2 года назад +3

    That was a lot more compelling of an argument than I thought it was going to be. The belch at the end really sold me if I'm being honest

  • @J_Hodders
    @J_Hodders 9 месяцев назад +2

    Didn't come here to be convinced and just came out of morbid (obesity) curiosity. Didn't expect sound and reasonable arguments, or at least the ones I heard fully over my own laughter and tears. Didn't expect to leave an Ogre. Hats off to you fine orator man, you mad genius, and thank you for guiding me to the light of the Maw.

    • @MithritWhitebeard
      @MithritWhitebeard 9 месяцев назад +2

      luv me ogres, simple as
      You're welcome at my feasting pit any time ogre buddy

  • @BigMikeMcBastard
    @BigMikeMcBastard 2 года назад +5

    WH Fantasy vampire would be my go-to for cushiest life, excluding strigoi/necrarch bloodlines. Vampires are insanely strong, all have powerful magic, can disguise themselves almost perfectly as human (even a witch hunter will probably miss them) and a lot of the classic vampire weaknesses aren't so bad in WH Fantasy. E.g. Sunlight burns but you can summon clouds to block it or wear heavy clothing and you're fine, and stuff like not showing up in mirrors or whatever other weaknesses are semi-random per vampire.
    In short, you're immortal, insanely powerful and can fight/flee reliably, can live a comfortable human life in the Empire or Bretonnia or wherever humans live comfortably, and while you need blood you don't need much and you don't actually have to kill people to obtain it. The only negative is you're suffused with dark magic and will probably be corrupted/driven mad by its influence over the years and your true form will look like an evil corpse.

  • @michaeledmunds7266
    @michaeledmunds7266 2 года назад +8

    90% of the joy in my life comes from food as is, so I'm basically an ogre already.

    • @JonathanGhost42
      @JonathanGhost42 Год назад

      Those 90% are Rookie Numbers. You need to step up the ogre-grindset and embrace the maw fully!

  • @micah766
    @micah766 Год назад +3

    This video may have been made 10 months ago, but watching it now has made me think. For the most part, I agree with these points. Being an Ogre in Warhammer fantasy would be great, if you were always an Ogre. The opening premise you presented was if you were suddenly isekaied into the setting as one of the races, and in what way this sucks depends entirely on the mechanics of the isekai.
    Option 1 - your memories are transplanted into an Ogre, but in every other way, they are still an Ogre. This sucks for a multitude of reasons, for one you aren't actually there, your memories have just been put into an Ogre. The Ogre might not be smart enough to understand what any of these memories mean, and they might be burdened by this so much that you actually make an Ogre with depression. The best case scenario for the Ogre in this situation is that, somehow, the knowledge that you had makes them smart enough to try and put some of the memories into their world. This may only mean the invention of the cheeseburger or the pizza, but if the Ogre can't do that, they'll either just be an Ogre, ignoring those memories because they're confusing and don't bring them more food, or they'll be depressed because they don't live in a world where you can just call some guy up and have them deliver food to you within a matter of minutes.
    Option 2 - you have been transplanted into the body of an Ogre. You will still, in fact, have all of your memories, experiences, and most importantly, your morals intact. You are now the smartest Ogre in the tribe, potentially. All of that talk about spiritual fulfilment, them being the perfect place between stupid and smart is all thrown out the window, because you replaced the mind of an Ogre with that of a Human. An Ogre might not care to think about the sanctity of all life and how the Noblars are bound to their very will, they just eat them. You, however, might not think that. You will have all of your human morals still in place and so you might have existential thoughts and possible depression over your servants. Additionally, you've been isekaied into a Warhammer setting, and that was the entire premise. You may not realize it for a little bit that you're in Warhammer, but eventually, you will, and you will eventually realize, or just know it off the bat, that the world you now live in is profoundly awful. Not only are you now existentially depressed because the Noblar you spoke to yesterday that you really liked got eaten by your tribe mate, but you're now depressed because you know how god awful the world you live in is and, given you're an Ogre, can't really do anything to fix.
    Now option 2 is based a bit more on your own morals as a person, and how you rationalize the whole isekai thing, but I feel that the majority of people will, in some way, be affected negatively by it, if only because of the realization of how shitty the world is.

    • @MouldMadeMind
      @MouldMadeMind Год назад

      Gnoblars are more sadistic goblins, I don't think anyone would think about their right to live for too long.

  • @dreamcatcherben8214
    @dreamcatcherben8214 2 года назад +8

    This reminds me of the eldar philosopher who concluded that orks had a perfect society

  • @SamuraiMorshu
    @SamuraiMorshu 2 года назад +57

    And fellas, ladies, imagine the Ogre *thiccness* of your average Ogre Woman

    • @ryancrazyrhino8976
      @ryancrazyrhino8976 2 года назад +25

      So basically all I need to do is imagine your mother

    • @topkek996
      @topkek996 2 года назад +5

      Thicc is just glorifying obesity.

    • @TheGovernmentputcrackinmyblunt
      @TheGovernmentputcrackinmyblunt 2 года назад +4

      @@topkek996 I see it mostly as hip to waist ratio with combination of muscle and some fat to fill out the hips and ass. But women usually use it as an excuse to let themselves go

    • @thehonoredone2361
      @thehonoredone2361 Год назад

      I would happily let a female Ogre devour me whole...no regrets 100%.

  • @rellek4053
    @rellek4053 2 года назад +7

    But Ogres are cursed to never be able to sate their hunger. Imagine always being uncomfortably hungry

  • @CrusadingJello
    @CrusadingJello 2 года назад +4

    I'm convinced everything tastes amazing to an Ogre. So that's another bonus.

  • @macdallanzero2145
    @macdallanzero2145 2 года назад +1

    I'm glad I stumbled across this. Cheers, mate.

  • @Hammer_Of_Olympia
    @Hammer_Of_Olympia 2 года назад +4

    This channel is constant gold! I would’ve said Orks but this video has made me agree with you, sounds pretty nifty

  • @n7revan829
    @n7revan829 2 года назад +2

    8:30 its like living in the copper age

  • @delboythethird1200
    @delboythethird1200 2 года назад +3

    Greasus- You're no meat eater! What's in it for you?
    Elf Simp- I want the pancreas...

  • @-Thunder-Warrior-
    @-Thunder-Warrior- 2 года назад +1

    "Noooooo! You must submit to the will of Chaos!"
    "Hur, Hur. Club goes crunch."

  • @dominicmanester8125
    @dominicmanester8125 2 года назад +9

    Orcs or a follower of Nurgle.
    Those guys are always having a whale of a time.
    Probably favour nurgle because they are the happiest in most situations that aren't a good krumping.

  • @jamjar1726
    @jamjar1726 2 года назад +20

    the ogres have one faction to worry about though: nurgle
    pro tip - do not EAT little men made of plague

    • @WitcherCrow
      @WitcherCrow 2 года назад +5

      Actually, In AoS, there is an Ogor clan that likes to eat Nurglite corrupted things. The way the slimy flesh slides down their throats, they like that.

    • @Pyrela
      @Pyrela 2 года назад +3

      @@WitcherCrow "The way the slimy flesh slides down their throats, they like that." Sounds like Games Workshop got inspired by your mom.

  • @tristanemery8748
    @tristanemery8748 2 года назад +2

    Am I the only one who thinks that "JUST EAT THE FUCKEN KNOBLAR" is comedy gold?

  • @goingblargh
    @goingblargh Год назад +3

    Now, let me ask you a very philosophical question…
    If an ogre decided he wanted to write poetry, what would it look like?
    Aw, who am I kidding? It’d probably look something like this:
    _Oh freddled gruntbuggly,_
    _Thy micturations are to me, (with big yawning)_
    _As plurdled gabbleblotchits, in midsummer morning_
    _On a lurgid bee,_
    _That mordiously hath blurted out,_
    _Its earted jurtles, grumbling_
    _Into a rancid festering confectious organ squealer. [drowned out by moaning and screaming]_
    _Now the jurpling slayjid agrocrustles,_
    _Are slurping hagrilly up the axlegrurts,_
    _And living glupules frart and stipulate,_
    _Like jowling meated liverslime,_
    _Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes,_
    _And hooptiously drangle me,_
    _With crinkly bindlewurdles,mashurbitries._
    _Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,_
    _See if I don't!_

  • @simongloutnez589
    @simongloutnez589 11 месяцев назад +1

    I remember watching at the Ogre introduction cinematic in Totalwar and thinking : those people are like me !

  • @igoruberwald
    @igoruberwald 2 года назад +3

    The spite in that voice: "People" of Bretonia

  • @klauskrampus4344
    @klauskrampus4344 2 года назад +1

    You make some of the most pleasant warhammer content I 've seen in a while.

  • @GrimDarkHalfOff
    @GrimDarkHalfOff 2 года назад +4

    In the old world I’d be a member of the vampire coast if I had a choice. Immortal. Criminals. Don’t have to get up until nighttime. Best life.

  • @SudrianTales
    @SudrianTales Год назад +1

    Imagine if the end times were stopped by the Ogres coming in pissed their fun will end and defeat the invaders, then devour them, then go back home because it's over.

  • @Glitch_Online
    @Glitch_Online 2 года назад +6

    You sir have enlightened me, i will now strive to live as they do.

  • @kaidothedrunkard
    @kaidothedrunkard 2 года назад +1

    First Orks, then Dwarves, now Ogres..
    The Collection of Favorites is slowly growing.

  • @cthulhluftagn3812
    @cthulhluftagn3812 2 года назад +5

    Ogres aren't stupid, they simply lack creativity due to being big and strong enough to solve all problems via punch.

    • @cthulhluftagn3812
      @cthulhluftagn3812 2 года назад +7

      Human; I'm so cold! I'll invent clothes!
      Oger under six inches of blubber: the fuck is 'cold'?

  • @dank_smirk2ndchannel200
    @dank_smirk2ndchannel200 Год назад +1

    9:19 "There’s not single miserable Ogre in existence"
    Look up Bragg the Gutsman, probably the *only* miserable Ogre in existence.

  • @emperorontheinternet6510
    @emperorontheinternet6510 2 года назад +25

    I instantly loved the ogres. not only do they look like mini versions of me but the lore is just awesome I mean they ride mammoths and carry cannons like guns.

    • @blakethesnake6686
      @blakethesnake6686 2 года назад +1

      @@ChvdMaximvs pretty cool to find your own mother randomly online

  • @alexandermarquardt597
    @alexandermarquardt597 2 года назад +1

    You had me at "all they do is eat and kill shit".
    Honestly, that sounds like a kind of fun life.

  • @miguelperez9906
    @miguelperez9906 2 года назад +22

    You should have said custodes are the best to live as you guard the emperor and get to hang out with the sisters of silence who are hot but don’t talk so no awkward conversations ever. Plus gold is thee best

    • @ethandew1768
      @ethandew1768 2 года назад +6

      No emotions, no freedom.

    • @AbelDuviant
      @AbelDuviant 2 года назад +2

      No emotion, eternal guarding, no brraks

    • @MrTux-tw4ld
      @MrTux-tw4ld 2 года назад

      @@ethandew1768 no emotions to make you care of you are free or not

    • @SamueL-td7fb
      @SamueL-td7fb 2 года назад +1

      Not to mention the body oil...

  • @AngloSaxonWheatFarmer
    @AngloSaxonWheatFarmer 11 месяцев назад +1

    > Wakeup
    > Say hello to the boys
    > First breakfast
    > Have a wash
    > Second breakfast
    > Third breakfast
    > Quick snack
    > Go smash things with the lads
    > Have a huge takeout
    > Get horrendously drubk
    > Second takeout
    > Third dinner
    > Smash more things
    > belly flop a few humans for mince “beef”
    > Several suppers
    > say goodnight to the boys
    > Sleep
    > Go for a cheeky entire cow during the night because your peckish
    > Drink enough beer to kill a dragon
    > chat with the boys some more
    > Fall asleep
    Repeat
    Sounds fun

  • @HazzronIV
    @HazzronIV 2 года назад +4

    The only being capable of being happier than an Ogre is an Ork but the life expectancy between the two is like comparing a buck to an ocean.

  • @jasonmullin3522
    @jasonmullin3522 2 года назад +1

    Listen to a few 40k video makers, glad to find a good one making fantasy. Don't play the games, but like hearing about the lore and faction. Thanks for the content you put out.

  • @SargonofAkkad
    @SargonofAkkad 2 года назад +27

    The body positivity movement wishes it had this kind of momentum.

    • @gantzisballs
      @gantzisballs 2 года назад +1

      Surprise guest of the day goes to....

    • @dantewilliams2757
      @dantewilliams2757 2 года назад +2

      The hell where did you come from

    • @akumaking1
      @akumaking1 2 года назад +1

      Not even the Ogre Kingdoms could tolerate the woke body positivity cult

  • @YourBoyNobody530
    @YourBoyNobody530 2 года назад +1

    The one ogre who decided to lift big things for the tiny people is definitely getting his food.

  • @aopt471
    @aopt471 9 месяцев назад +3

    "There is not a single miserable Ogre in existence." - Read about thr Gorgers and how they become Gorgers.

  • @lokstercoolwhip
    @lokstercoolwhip 8 месяцев назад +1

    I still would take orks first, but you have convinced me this is a close second place

  • @BestOfGermany67
    @BestOfGermany67 2 года назад +3

    Y'all forget that every second an Ogre isn't eating they're basically starving. They don't just eat cuz they're huge gluttons(which still is a reason though), they eat because of the curse of the Great Maw, which keeps them forever starving. The only time you can ease that hunger is when you're eating. But as an Ogre you will never feel full and the moment your meal is finished you're back to the pain of starving.

  • @kazukixivv9252
    @kazukixivv9252 2 года назад +2

    Already loving this channel subbed :)

  • @oceanstar70
    @oceanstar70 2 года назад +3

    As a fellow diabetic and fat bastard at heart, I'm convinced.

  • @nano1166
    @nano1166 7 месяцев назад +1

    "Or the skaven who are basically free food 🍲 " 😂 yo, thats foul.