How to Have Christian Discernment in Relationships (6 Tips)
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- Опубликовано: 18 сен 2018
- Do you have Christian discernment? Christian discernment is very important, including when it comes to relationships. Here are 6 tips on Christian discernment in relationships.
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There are so many 'relationship experts' but they don't teach from a Biblical perspective. Everyone was created for a purpose. I believe God is using you to help Christians around the world in this godless generation. God bless your efforts!!
One way to tell how serious a Christian is about their faith is how they react to being called out on their sin.
thanks for sharing
Good afternoon, and Amen.
Amen❤️
Amen 🙏🏽
Yes. Most people are so prideful or full of shame.
Luke 6:45. The tree is know by its fruit, so your actions determine whether your motives are good or evil.
Somebody once advised me to “See people for who they are, not who you want them to be”
Wow I needed that.
1. Overlook simple behavior because they're assuming their motive is pure
2. Overlook self-contradictions
3. Swing from idolizing someone to demonizing them
4. Consistently missing relationship signals
5. Keeping trying the same thing with the same person and expecting something different
6. Imbalanced boundaries in Christian dating
I think simple(x) -> sinful (o) Thx for the summary:)
Spoilet alert dude
Wow I do all 6 of these things. Discernment is something I pray for but is not one of my spiritual gifts. I have to go to the word for wisdom and get discernment from Him. Things and people are often not so black and white.
Discernment is one of the most Blessing gifts The Holy Spirit has given me from prayer!
Sometimes my discernment comes so fast i feel like im judging the persons heart without giving them a real chance.
Yes! I was dating a guy and on the first month my spirit knew we were unequally yoked. He said he knew Jesus and believed in Him, so I ignored what I thought was judgment, and gave him a chance.
I can relate 🥺
When that happens I just take a step back. Ecclesiastes 3 tells us there's a time for everything. I interceed in the meantime
Examine the fruit
Good afternoon, Miss Dejear. If uou are that sensitive to the Holy Spirit, that is a true blessing. Keep your discernment clear, and growing. You are not judging people when you perceive what God wants you to see. Make sure you make no negative presumption about the person in response to this. Also, don't be overly quick to think someone is right. Please be sure that you obey Him about what you see.
THIS IS SUCH A BLESSING TO ME... BECAUSE I HAVE OVERLOOKED THINGS THAT TRUELY BOTHER ME BUT BECAUSE I WANT THE RELATIONSHIP TO WORK SO BADLY, SO NOW
I JUST CANT IGNORE THINGS ANYMORE
Establishing healthy boundaries is the hardest part for me. Not just when it comes to romantic relationships, but also friendships. Would you consider doing a video just on boundaries? I'm sure it would help me and other people a lot. Thank you for this one, it was great as usual.
He has already done one I believe.
@@lxDarkToothxl I'm going to search for it, thank you for letting me know.
Oh I thrive on boundaries lol
@@inputname2727 that is great!
Daphne’s Madayre has a video on
Setting boundaries before and during
Dating/ Courtship
Discernment is noticing all the nuances of a conversation not only based on words but also body language and voice inflections. We can actually see a spirit of someone through Holy Spirit discernment. When we are deeply connected to the Holy Spirit He will warn us or give us joy based on the spirit of the other person. Christ spoke to the devil when he addressed Judas, "one of you is a devil."
Yep boundaries is good. Confirmation from God for me. I haven't let everyone in that approach me, but I have a hard time letting go of people that don't have my best interest at heart.
Hello Mark! My discernment tells me... You have a gift- when it comes to: Relationship Topic! Lol. And, not just any type of Relationship, but essentially A Godly Relationship type of Discernment hehe. You’re gift is such a tremendous Blessing! I encourage you to continue to pursue this, as it seems it is your innate nature and strength! Thank you for impacting other people’s lives in A Godly way of Living. A Beautiful way to Glorify GOD! May God Bless you, your Marriage, and your Family! Happy Holidays. GOD Speed! :)
Allowing the right people in your life and NOT allowing the wrong people in your life- boundaries. Thank you.
I'm an intellect, but head knowledge isn't enough. I need it to manifest internally and emotionally. So helpful.😀
That last point is something I've been thinking about a lot lately, which is that I struggle to set up boundaries within my friendships/coworkers (basically people I have to go to school with or work with, friends at church are of course not much of a problem).
I think part of where that comes from is that unfortunately I have been saturated with unrighteous behavior from people (including my parents, despite growing up in the church our entire lives) my entire life from infancy. And of course being a dependent child I didn't really have the opportunity to distance myself from that to spare my conscience.
It has made me numb to those things, and though I consciously try not to choose those things myself, I don't care or am not offended if my peers do it because that's how it has always been for me, and so that behavior begins to rub off on me little by little. Now I'm facing conviction because I am old enough to make those decisions of who to associate with, but also guarding my heart when it comes to people like my coworkers, who I *do* have to be around and get along with. I have been able to stay away from outright destructive relationships, thank God; most everybody I spend time around is (by the worldly definition) a "good person", but that doesn't mean they all help build up my faith.
I will be praying that I can stand up and draw the line with people like my coworkers and say, "Hey, I would like for you to not talk like this around me or with me." What really set off these thoughts was a new hire at work, he is a Christian, and he made sure everybody at work knows it, so they generally are more respectful towards his convictions, and I try to stick up for him when they lapse.
I can see the heart of the problem quickly except when it comes to myself. I’m in a situation right now and I wish I could see it with fresh eyes, it’s so hard.
This has been the best video I’ve seen so far on this subject because the core of having discernment is knowing the Word of God.
Always an on-time word Mark! May God continue to bless and keep you and your family.
Sophia4Christ I like your name!
God's Original same to you!
Spot on Mark - thank you.
Keep up the amazing work and helping and guiding all of our brothers and sisters through the will of God! Great video and very good insight as always brother Mark!
Thank you for explaining it so we'll! Amen
amen, practice makes permanent. 💖 great message as always
When you had a a long relationship when someone who from the beginning had affairs with other women...and he was a Christian....however we did go back and forth and yes it was the same to the point in our relationship hev ut water in my petrol tank to try wreck myself and my car.
But God saw me through and now
..my ex was like that.
However I am going out now with a nice man...he is nice but taking steps slow with God's help.
Awesome teaching! Enjoyed this word and learning about relationship discernment.
I lacked discernment until 3 experiences changed me forever. I don't know if I'll ever be open to dating again. Though I want marriage deep inside. But everytime I call it quits God says not to.
I can relate to this so much, I hope you’re doing well on your journey.
I am loving what I hear from you so far. And love your style of teaching. Very easy to understand.
You are so wise! God is using you to reach people!
Thank you Mark. You educate me like a good big brother! I appreciate you very much!!🤗
This was really good Mark.
This was good. I really needed to hear this this morning. Thank you.
Thank you... Is very difficult.. but what you said is helpful..
I'm learning a lot from you. Thank you Mark for sharing and GOD bless you more and your family!
Amen, I'm so glad the content has been helpful to you!
Really great video. Thank you for sharing. God bless you.
Thanks very informative.
Thank you very much, very accurate
Very insightful video!
THANK YOU MARK. THIS HELPS ALOT!
Truth. Thanks!
There is risk in all relationships. But praise God, He will show us through the Holy Spirit as we get to know others. If something seems off, it’s good to pay attention to that. And pray continually 🙏
I love your RUclips videos Mark. They are such a blessing to watch and learn from. Thank you for another very valuable teaching. God bless your ministry 🙌
This came up in my feed today 😇
I have to improve a lot. Thank you for being this specific, Mark. It's like you're talking to me.
God is good, lean into him!
Thanks for the reply. Just downloaded your free ebooks. Thank you sooo much!
I love all of your videos! Thank you for sharing they have really helped me and I’m excited to read your e book!
So glad the videos have been helpful and I hope you enjoy the book!
So good 😊🙏
Thank you, your advice is very practical.
So glad it was helpful!
Its God speaking to me right now 👑🙏
I really needed to hear this about motives
Thanks a lot👏
Thank you for doing this.
I like his voice
Thank you!
God bless you Mark!
Mark, this has really helped me. I am considering signing up for help, hopefully to steer me into a God honouring, Christ exalting life, as a single or if God wills to change this gift of singleness for a gift if marriage in the future. I trust He knows me more than I know myself and therefore He knows what’s best for me. I am so glad that He is God and I am not.
#5 really spoke to me! Thank you! Your videos are so in perfect timing and answers to my prayers! I feel as if through you and your videos, God is speaking to me about a relationship with someone I have been in, off and on, who grew up as a Christian and was baptized but who fell away when he was a teen because he thought his prayers were unanswered, and decided to take matters into his own hands regarding an ill close relative. I was led to your videos a couple of weeks ago and can't seem to get enough of them!!
I have been in horrible, verbally, and physically abusive relationships! This man who says he will not believe in the Abrahamic God and sees Him as cruel and unloving, is nice, gentle, a person who exhibits the fruits of the Spirit. He treats me well. I really want to be married to a man who puts God first, prays with me, goes to church with me, praises and worships God with me, wants to be a dad (he does) and would be a great dad and a great husband. I don't like that his heart is hard toward God.
Hi Tolise Adkisson, I'm so glad the videos have been helpful to you :)
This is so eye opening. Yes I keep going back to the same guy because I’m so confused on his mixed signals. 😢
Watching this guys videos made me realize I should study the Bible more and I wish I would have started watching these videos 3 years ago so I could apply it to my life.
Thank you
“Dang that keeps happening to me” is sending me #guilty love your content 😂 and that you help us apply God’s word❣️
Good video & tips, brother. TIP 4: I like your emphasis on being able to accurately gauge "interest" from others as being legit or not (if you're unmarried & Christian). Would that not also spill over to a potential significant other; i.e. we or they struggle to discern perceived "interest" from others toward the person that we're with - misreading that well & making assumptions about that as well? Thanks & God Bless!
the work ethic one got me 😂😂😂😂😂
This was excellent advice! Thanks a lot. Great value in this vid :)
My pleasure! God bless!
I agree
I need help here Lord jesus
We are not allowed to judge people's intentions, only God can see it. We can either idolize or demonize others.
God bless
Would love free e book
What is the difference between spiritual and relationship discernment?
What if they are pretending about their external actions?
You will know them by their fruit!
Yes, so I’m confused. As in the situation with the money girl, would she be considered “good” or “bad” with money??
How does one person send this pastor a message if they have a burning question.. Please help
I don't see the link pinned, is it still available?
LOL. U are so preaching to me about trying the same thing with the same person but expect a better outcome. I know this to be true! I’ve been knowing this! SMH...
Even worse is when they do not care smh
So what if I'm trying to help someone who lacks relationship discernment
I try to use disserment but i lack experience.
Is taking people at face value not naiave? Not everybody is trustworthy.
True, but if you don't give people a chance to prove themselves and you walk into every relationship with a suspicious mind, you will always "see" something that confirms your thinking. I'm speaking from a place of someone who has major trust issues and that is how I lived my life. It's also why I'm still single on the far side of 30. No one is perfect and everyone has weaknesses and is going to show you a side that you don't like. Taking someone at face value is getting to know them without jumping to conclusions and taking your time. We should not have blind faith though and just immediately open up to people and be vulnerable with them until enough time has passed for us to see who they really are.
Can someone expound upon the 4th?
what if I don't like anyone I meet. I realize the common denominator is me but I tried ignoring that impression because I felt bad because I felt I was judgemental… when I ignored the I don't like you impression... I regretted it .. and now I am staying with my 1st impressions... is this discernment/
I'm so with you on this. It seems like i have not been able to find a true believe that i can see myself with yet have some level of attraction to him. There was one guy that seemed like he was a true doer of the word and i liked him but God eventually revealed he wasn't walking the walk of a true believer. So I've been thinking is this just a sign God is telling me it's not the time yet and wait for his timing? I'm getting close to mid 30's @ApplyGodsword.com/MarkB...
Hi I’m Olivia and I’m saved, I want to ask you something.. I read my Bible from time to time but I want to read it more but I don’t know were to start?
Start Mathew its basics of jesus story. Then read romans, it tells you how to be saved romans 10:9-10. Bless you sister stay strong.
Hi sister
Just pray to Jesus and ask the spirit to speak to you and lead to the page that he wants you to read. Sometimes,a book can drop I to your heart...
Or,. Simply, just use a devotional 😊..
All the best. Bless you, sis💫
Mark, where is the comments section in your website these days? Thanks.
brother, can you talk about what to do, when an unbeliever cheated on you, and he chose that person over you?
I know this question is not meant for me but if someone, believer or non believer cheats on you and chooses that person then you probably should just move on . Even if they were to choose you, if someone cheats on you let the other girl have him because you deserve a honest man who will respect you. I know it's easier said than done but just look at it as if God was trying to protect you from being unequally yoked. All the best xx.
an na There’s nothing to do leave him to do as he pleases and let him choose what he wants for his life ..
How do you increase your discernment? Some people are pathological liars 🤥
It is definitely not sin to judge a person's motives! That's a doctrine of man that is not reflected in the actual Bible, especially with people who have a high level of spiritual authority, especially apostolic and prophetic authority.
God knows all hearts and those who know God are given His thoughts, which include the thoughts and motives of people. Even by your own definition, discernment is the ability to know the truth, which includes the "heart" of a person or matter. To then say that we can't know someone's heart contradicts that. As with any other spiritual gift, we grow in our ability to discern. Peter is a good example. He started off receiving "random" revelation about the "heart" (secret identity) of Jesus, then proudly trying to rebuke Jesus' plan to die on the cross because he was in his flesh. But after he received the Holy Spirit and grew in his apostolic authority, his authority in the use of his discernment increased. He used it to correct people who thought that the believers were drunk at Pentecost (Acts 2), to rebuke Ananias and Sapphira for trying to deceive God via lying to Holy Spirit-filled Christians, to rebuke Simon the Sorcerer for greed and false discipleship, etc.
God shows me people's hearts very quickly. In dreams. While I'm awake. All day and night. My tests: believe and act on what He says or nah?
God sends me to screen people who claim to be His servants and ministers. During a live group dream interpretation session on RUclips with a person claiming to be a "prophet", he immediately asked me if I'm in ministry as soon as I shared part of a dream as a test for him. I told the truth. He correctly interpreted the part of my dream that I shared, then he said that I have the gift of discernment but don't use it. I immediately knew that God was using him in that moment to tell me to believe what He said about people online and start unsubscribing and unfollowing people who He has already told me are false prophets. I quickly repented and obeyed God in unfollowing all of the "online ministers" who flunk their spiritual tests! God had temporarily influenced this false prophet who has the gift of discernment but misuses it to make money speak only the truth...in response to my prayer. Ha.
After I aced THAT discernment test, God greatly increased my authority in that gift...which a true prophet had prophesied to me would happen a month earlier...which culminated in a high-level pastor publicly and privately admitting that God rebuked him for his "secret" bad attitude toward the congregation when the high-level tithers left because he flunked his spiritual tests...because those of us with super-high discernment didn't believe his "excellent poker face" (his own admission) and finely-crafted, Biblically-correct sermons, so we kept praying for him to repent! God told him exactly who he needs to specifically make things right with...to get off of His hit list. The "secret" intercessors in the congregation. 😉
John 2:23-25:
Because of the miraculous signs Jesus did in Jerusalem at the Passover celebration, many began to trust in him. But Jesus didn’t trust them, because he knew all about people. No one needed to tell him about human nature, for he knew what was in each person’s heart.
1 Corinthians 2:9-16:
That is what the Scriptures mean when they say, “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.”
But it was to us that God revealed these things by his Spirit. For his Spirit searches out everything and shows us God’s deep secrets. No one can know a person’s thoughts except that person’s own spirit, and no one can know God’s thoughts except God’s own Spirit. And we have received God’s Spirit (not the world’s spirit), so we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us.
When we tell you these things, we do not use words that come from human wisdom. Instead, we speak words given to us by the Spirit, using the Spirit’s words to explain spiritual truths. But people who aren’t spiritual can’t receive these truths from God’s Spirit. It all sounds foolish to them and they can’t understand it, for only those who are spiritual can understand what the Spirit means.
Those who are spiritual can evaluate all things, but they themselves cannot be evaluated by others. For, “Who can know the Lord’s thoughts? Who knows enough to teach him?”
But we understand these things, for we have the mind of Christ.
Romans 8:26-27:
And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will.
Matthew 16:13-20:
When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say that the Son of Man is?”
“Well,” they replied, “some say John the Baptist, some say Elijah, and others say Jeremiah or one of the other prophets.”
Then he asked them, “But who do you say I am?”
Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”
Jesus replied, “You are blessed, Simon son of John, because my Father in heaven has revealed this to you. You did not learn this from any human being. Now I say to you that you are Peter (which means ‘rock’), and upon this rock I will build my church, and all the powers of hell will not conquer it. And I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of Heaven. Whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden in heaven, and whatever you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven.”
Then he sternly warned the disciples not to tell anyone that he was the Messiah.
Acts of the Apostles 5:1-11:
But there was a certain man named Ananias who, with his wife, Sapphira, sold some property. He brought part of the money to the apostles, claiming it was the full amount. With his wife’s consent, he kept the rest.
Then Peter said, “Ananias, why have you let Satan fill your heart? You lied to the Holy Spirit, and you kept some of the money for yourself. The property was yours to sell or not sell, as you wished. And after selling it, the money was also yours to give away. How could you do a thing like this? You weren’t lying to us but to God!”
As soon as Ananias heard these words, he fell to the floor and died. Everyone who heard about it was terrified. Then some young men got up, wrapped him in a sheet, and took him out and buried him.
About three hours later his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. Peter asked her, “Was this the price you and your husband received for your land?”
“Yes,” she replied, “that was the price.”
And Peter said, “How could the two of you even think of conspiring to test the Spirit of the Lord like this? The young men who buried your husband are just outside the door, and they will carry you out, too.”
Instantly, she fell to the floor and died. When the young men came in and saw that she was dead, they carried her out and buried her beside her husband.
Great fear gripped the entire church and everyone else who heard what had happened.
Acts of the Apostles 8:9-24:
A man named Simon had been a sorcerer there for many years, amazing the people of Samaria and claiming to be someone great. Everyone, from the least to the greatest, often spoke of him as “the Great One-the Power of God.” They listened closely to him because for a long time he had astounded them with his magic.
But now the people believed Philip’s message of Good News concerning the Kingdom of God and the name of Jesus Christ. As a result, many men and women were baptized. Then Simon himself believed and was baptized. He began following Philip wherever he went, and he was amazed by the signs and great miracles Philip performed.
When the apostles in Jerusalem heard that the people of Samaria had accepted God’s message, they sent Peter and John there. As soon as they arrived, they prayed for these new believers to receive the Holy Spirit.
The Holy Spirit had not yet come upon any of them, for they had only been baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus. Then Peter and John laid their hands upon these believers, and they received the Holy Spirit.
When Simon saw that the Spirit was given when the apostles laid their hands on people, he offered them money to buy this power.
“Let me have this power, too,” he exclaimed, “so that when I lay my hands on people, they will receive the Holy Spirit!”
But Peter replied, “May your money be destroyed with you for thinking God’s gift can be bought! You can have no part in this, for your heart is not right with God. Repent of your wickedness and pray to the Lord. Perhaps he will forgive your evil thoughts, for I can see that you are full of bitter jealousy and are held captive by sin.”
“Pray to the Lord for me,” Simon exclaimed, “that these terrible things you’ve said won’t happen to me!”
From making a huge mistake
or it means you know better but desperate
Christian men shouldn’t be taught to look for a woman by how hard she works at a job or whatever. Men should be providing for their families. It’s disgraceful how Christian men have dropped the ball on being the breadwinners. .
Angel Diamond Star are you providing for your man? Who’s the knucklehead?
They should be. If someone is too lazy to work and wants to live off you, bye bye.
I look at it this way since the workforce isn't exclusively for men anymore the despite having to work for a living it doesn't make me a man. I certainly don't feel like one.
You're using judging wrong we are Not to Judge God judges
We are free to judge but must remember we will be judged.
I heard him say that we should not judge another person's motives, because we don't really know their motives. But we should discern their actions. Is that not correct?
@@lynnv8501 yeah that is what he said.
Also the Bible speaks about good judgement which is speaking of discernment and balancing and acting with wisdom . But judging a person overall ... is not our job , but God’s
@9:50
Not my fault. Autistic as "duck". Can't pick up on "signals". If a woman wants something from me, she needs to be 100% crystal clear and not "duck" around with "flirting", "sarcasm", or any other method of subcommunication. Say what you mean, and mean what you say, or it's going to go way over my head. Think, Draxx, from Guardians of the Galaxy. He's an idiot. So am I. If you are interested in me, you need to say "I like you, and I want to go out with you on a date" or I'm not going to pick up on it. Sorry, ladies. But that's the way it is.
5 women, in high school and college, have hit on me. I know this because I realized my naivety 4-5 years later. Then, the next time I was being hit on, I responded in kind... Turns out, she wasn't hitting on me, and I made a huge mistake and ruined a perfectly good friendship. Again, not my fault. Autistic as "duck", and women don't know how to be direct with their words/feelings.
Miles Matheson lol maybe try just being completely honest with girls about how you lack the ability to understand undertones. Also autistic is not dumb just different so please don’t call it dumb. Also sometimes you just have to put yourself out there if you like someone and not always try and wait to see if someone likes you first and then they will make it clear if they aren’t into you.
The ability to see the truth doesn't come from applying the bible...
Its about trusting that you will know what God wants you to know when he wants you to know it. HIS will.... Worrying about not being fooled is not the resolution. Because once you've got faith in God, you won't see problems but opportunities... To apply love. Because we are the image of Love. We are of the spirit of God...
I agree that its not good to judge or be concerned about WHY someone is abusing (sinning) us... The point is to not abuse back. And sometimes walking away from them is abandonment and a selfish action. This is why we need to listen closely to God within. Not other people. Not a book. But the direct source within us...
Its absolutely no concern of yours where others are at, in their spiritual journey... Your job... As a worker of God... Is to LOVE them regardless...... Spreading love ... Is the great work.
When we call ourselves by a religious title and make things for those within our group, we are practicing separatism and that is not Godly. Jesus didn't die so we could call ourselves Christians, he died to save us from the lies that can fill our life times with fear and sin. The promise of him saving us only applies if we truly believe in him and him in us.
We who spread his word would NEVER SELL IT... FOR HOW CAN YOU SELL A TRUTH THAT WAS GIVEN YOU FOR FREE..... FROM THE FATHER...?
@Angel Diamond Star Well thank you! I actually do not allow full nudity lol but I'm glad your gf forgave you :)
The Bible is not Gods word... We are.
We need to apply ourselves to God....
The Way of The Masseuse The Bible is Gods living word !!!
@@gabrielamartinyuk6438 Respectfully, The living word can only live within us, his only homes to dwell in.
The bible speaks OF the WORD but IT is NOT the word itself. It even states within it, that The holy spirit is the living word...
The people who killed him stole the writings if his followers, bound them up with old covenant and push the book around as though IT is the living word, but they are liars, and so is their father. The word can be neither bought nor sold. But yet their exist bible stores etc. Bible collages for a hefty price indeed.
Come out of THEIR book and get into HIS SPIRIT.
Thank you
God bless!