his advice is only good depending on the person hearing it.. I would be way more willing to marry someone if I was the average joe, compared to if I was loaded with lots of options...
He says what women want to hear. But the honest truth is if he was sure she's the one, he would have gotten married a long gone ago. Money has nothing to do with it.
@@vitorfernandes651 Depends on where you live Vitor. In America it's money 1st Love 2nd. A sad truth I wished I would of realized earlier. Peace and Blessings.
@Hallam Dyal well most times when you are at the bottom with a women, you stay there. Or if you climb to the top, you go for another woman, because you have more options
@@SunnySummer777 this is late but yes it's true. Even when we are single we still struggle when we aren't where we thought we'd be. Especially if you had teachers & family that tell you "you should be this by this age" or " I was already doing this at your ave". That's where stress, overworking & anger starts to grow because at that point we feel there's no one seeing what they're going through.
As a young man this advice was useful for me to cause I’m 24 and I haven’t found my purpose in life yet. I work my ass off everyday and I’m very financially disciplined I just haven’t found that clear path Steve talks about. This is very true for men to feel complete. Men we have to just keep working towards our goals and strive to be the best person we can be every single day 💯
Steve's advice was so damn true! My parents dated for 15 years because my dad wanted to have enough money and a good job to provide for my mom and for future kids (aka me).
15 years? More like he was waiting to find someone better, but in the end settled for what he got. But sure, the romantic version sounds so much better.
@@Mizwanderer1989 Disliked, that's quite an assumption on Morgan's parents. Every situation is different. FYI, I have 2 friends who dated 14 years before marriage. She was a doctor, he was an engineer. He worked his butt off to earn as much as her before they got married. She admires and loves his hard work.
@@freestylepunk Assumption? More like recognising a pattern. I have seen it many many times. When people settle and finally decide on the "romantic" version, gullible people ah and oh over their stories. But that is all it is. A nicely packaged story. One doesn't wait a lifetime to start a family with their loved ones because they don't have their perfect job or career. They might delay having kids, which is reasonable to not bring a new life in poverty, but anything else is just excuses.
Sometimes the desire blinds us, she desperately wants to be a wife & a mother that's great but you should ask yourself is my partner ready for that too, don't just think of your needs look to the other part of the relationship as well
Exactly he could love her too much that he gives her everything she wants but sacrificing his own happiness, thats when he will regret later on and then leave her. The grass aint greener on the otherside of marriage but its worth it.
@@icycici well then dont propose if you're nor in that direction it is his responsibility as a man to Express his reasons for wanting to wait before publicly claiming a woman as his intended wife only to ask for a postponement without communicating a reason.
This really hits home. My brother was in a very similar situation, he was in a relationship for about 6-7 years, they were high school sweethearts. She told him she wanted to have kids already because everyone around her was already getting married and having kids. The biggest one being her twin sister had gotten married already and moved out of the house. They had constant arguments about it, he would come to me for some type of advice, but my brother was just not ready for that type of commitment even though he loved her very much. It sucked because she just couldn’t wait for him to finish his school/get his degree, it was like a thing she wanted to happen immediately. They broke up and within a few weeks she was already dating someone else and engaged ( I will never understand this). But in the end it was probably the best thing to happen to my brother , he’s starting to take his future more seriously and knows what he wants to do in life, and as a career, he’s been working really hard towards it now.
Yeesh. I’m glad that your brother is doing well. The girl really was set on getting married right away. She’s probably just giving it too much priority because she feels like as long as she is married it will be wonderful, and feels if she isn’t married things are terrible (feels inferior to peers, doesn’t have what she feels will make her life complete, etc.) She didn’t give her feelings enough thought. You’ve got to challenge your feelings often times to make sure they won’t lead you into trouble.
@@danielglidewell Aww thanks! I’m glad he’s doing better to. When he came to my mom and me we had a long talk, we all know that in her mind, fantasy will probably be better than reality. We hope the best for her as we aren’t spiteful, but you can’t help but wonder if one day she will realize what a big mistake she made, and there’s no going back now. It would just be too disrespectful to him and our family (seeing how hurt he was) if she tried to come back.
For a bro's high school sweetheart, she sure didn't love him enough to wait and stay with him until he was ready like one. A fortunate and, somehow, unfortunate bro
It's a good advice but he could have some other reason too, I think she should be a little careful. She sounds like a very sweet girl and she is so pretty. May God bless her heart!
I was thinking the same thing....there isn't enough information to say that the issue is just that he wasn't financially ready....he could have felt like Maybe he didn't love her enough to see himself married to her for the rest of his life but didn't have the heart to tell her but still he keeps in touch cuz he doesn't wanna fully let her go...Idk....I just felt like Maybe the solution wasnt Just clear cut like Steve made it seem
I didnt have much when me and ny wife married. We are building together. I struggled with wanting to provide more,but God wanted us to grow together. Sometimes us men got to put our ego and do the right thing
It's not always about Ego, it's the "complete" feeling of being a man and wanting to provide for his woman. That's not a crime, if he doesn't feel like he's ready then why bulldoze your way through and hope for the best. He want to be able to give her something nice and memorable, that's not a crime
This makes so much sense!!! All the men I've dated have told me this exact thing. 'i don't want to get married until I'm financially secure" it makes sense... I'm going to support this man with whatever he needs to do to get to where he wants to be
You go out to eat, he can't pay, y'all can't leave There's dishes in the back, he gotta roll up his sleeves But while y'all washin', watch him He gon' make it to a Benz out of that Datsun He got that ambition, baby, look at his eyes This week he moppin' floors, next week it's the fries So stick by his side I know there's dudes ballin', and yeah, that's nice And they gonna keep callin' and tryin', but you stay right, girl *And when you get on, he'll leave yo' ass for a white girl*
She should have thanked him for his honesty and told him that when he was ready for marriage, she hopes he finds someone that makes him happy. But, it won't be her. She has every right to want what she wants, and she has every right to not want to be with someone who doesn't align with her desires. The same way he has the right to not do something that doesn't align with his desires. He has the right to say he's not ready. And she has the right to say I am, and when you are I wish you the best.
I think that this is a conversation nobody teach us to have. I think in general we expect men to desire what we want always, and honestly, they are really simply human beings. It’s valid that someone is not ready in the moment, and if she thinks she can wait, she can do it. It depends on what they agreed. I think we also have to stop being so harsh with woman’s decision, sometimes it’s not a waste of time wait for a man, is an agreement. But it’s a couple decision. Not every story has a bad ending or the same context.
Not only is she gorgeous, she has a good head on her shoulders and her priorities are wholesome. A wife and a mother. She's a dying breed. Whoever finds her and makes an honest woman out of her has found an eternal treasure.
@@davidg5965 She was probably heartbroken by her fiance wanting to delay the wedding, so it's understandable why she would be scared to talk with him about it. I'm not saying she was wrong, but she wasn't right either. The fact that she was willing to ask for another man's advice and hear him out shows that she still loves her fiance. Tell me, have you ever had a girlfriend? Have you ever been engaged?
@@dedsecaffiliate1979 yeah I have a girlfriend but when we have problems we have heart to heart conversations and don't on TV or let everyone know lol, I Definitely get what you're saying though
Why would you want to be with someone thats not on the same page as you though? You shouldnt have to sacrifice your goals in life to please someone else. I had one woman tell me that she asked her man over and over again if they were ever going to tie the knot or have kids because that's something she really wanted in life , and he always had some sort of excuse. Well guess what? She hit a certain age and started menopause and was no longer able to have children and her time was wasted And now she resents him because of it. On another note, you need to communicate. Make what you want in life clear from the start. And either work things out and compromise , or if you two can't be on the same page then dont be together. Don't waste eachothers time. If you dont want to follow on the same path you dont belong together. Dont waste her time, and dont pressure him. Simple.
I was so like this with my ex... she wanted me to propose during uni. She wanted to have kids in 3 years. I wanted to wait till I had a job to propose. Guys really do think financially and it’s taken Steve for me to see that I do this subconsciously 👏🏼
I literally watch this at least once a day because at 25 I'm going through what she is going and not only am I losing hope in myself but in the relationship
Decide if you want to stay or not from a strength perspective, rather than fear. I stayed in a stagnant relationship for years and by the time I was 29, I thought that if I leave, I'll never find someone better. But I left bc I favored my biological clock. Six months later, I found my husband and we are happy and whole.
This is SO spot on. I've heard/seen so many people getting married too early, having kids and absolutely dragging themselves financially. I won't be getting married until I KNOW I'm ready either! I want to enjoy life not work 12hrs just to get by and support my family. I'm sure my future partner and kids would want the same.
Am so happy to be born in an era with Steve Harvey as a big part of it, he really helps me and am sure millions of people out there. Thanks mr Steve Harvey.
Theres a thing called a 'hush ring'which ive heard in some reality shows where the man proposes to shut the woman up about marriage. Some men are very deceptive
Been almost 2 years with my boyfriend. Not living together, but he wants to. Not that I dont, but he's $47,000 in student debt(also has more with a parent student loan). And he's not sure where exactly he's going career wise.... he'll be 34 years old soon, I'm 26. what should I do?:/
Or maybe he does want to marry her he just doesn't want to rush. There's nothing wrong with getting married when your not completely financially stable bc they can both help one another. Now a child is a different case. He probably didn't tell her bc he knew that she'll still rush him into marriage.
Bajan Strokes Survivor Steve should have ask more questions than just being the "i know every answer because i know the nature of the average man so i know your man particularly "
Steve felt that one! People talk about Steve this and that, but Steve (like everyone else) is human and through him helping others is helping him with his stuff in the past. Steve you alright with me! My mama always watch you as well as I! I want me and my mama be in your seats at your talk show one day soon!! 🧡💛💚💜❤️ what you do Mr.Steve!!
Steve , you just spoke my heart out , wish I could hug you. You are the best, your videos gives me motivation. Thanks a lot for spreading the positivity, thanks a ton. Love from India ❤.
Of all the pageantry talk shows and host...this is some of the most genuine, authentic, honest, direct and blatant solid advice/perspective ever televised. I’m surprised the net work execs allowed this to air.
I know someone who did the same exact thing. The girl didn't contact him anymore. He has a good job now but still not married. Some men have commitment issues. Period. He is going to do the same to someone else.
Steve Harvey is a real father and truly knows how to converse with young people, when it truly matters. Well done Steve, we can all take a leaf out if your book.😃😃😃
My gf waited 7 years for me to get my life together. I have a great job with benefits and most importantly I can provide and protect her and our future family. I just bought her a $7k ring cash and now I plan on giving it to her b4 we buy our first house. God is great 👍 🙌 🙏 ❤
How so sweet. I really am so happy for both of you. Seems you guys are amazing people. Wish all the best for you and your girlfriend 🤗🙏 and happy wedding as well! ☺️
Wish I had someone that would wait for me that long to get my life together and still love me and support me and not complain that I don't give her enough to or affection when all I'm trying to do is become financially stable enough to do what she an I want to do together
This is ABSOLUTELY the BEST advice ever! It’s not always a negative reason why a guy won’t commit, like playing games etc... this is SOUL deep people! Trust what your intuition tells you. It doesn’t ever lie. Wishing everyone well on their journeys.
I see this as an oppurtunity for the couple. As a man, I will cherish my partner more, if we go through this difficult episode together. Facing the challenge together; failing at times and finally succeeding with the support of your partner will build and forge an unbreakable foundation to the relationship. Wishing them the best!
Amazing advice. I got married at 22 and felt 75% ready financially. We had a rough 2 years at the beginning. 7 years later I’m 95% where I want to be and now separated 😂
My Mom and Dad were dead broke when they got married, it was some of the happiest days of their lives! They made it happen. Life shouldn't be about the "stuff". Not the guys fault, society is putting unrealistic material expectations on couples. Get married. Work hard. Be thirfty. Make some kids. The "stuff" will come in time. My Mom and Dad made four kids - none of us have been to jail or been pregnant out of wedlock. Two of their kids are Vets. We all vote. Lots of memories and good times and they weren't financially stable till Dad was in his early sixties and retiring. Love conquers all.
I totally get how she feels. I have expressed that to my boyfriend before and I told him that I’ll be patient with him and that if I don’t see that later on in our relationship then I will end a relationship with respect his decision. But this year and lately I have not mentioned it to him because at the end I don’t want it to turn out as a disappointment
Don't let your inhibitions be your guide. Steve made an excellent point. Relax and just have fun until he's ready to meet the family structure you will need. 60 years is a long time to be with someone, just make sure it is not full of regrets because you either didn't call him back or is forcing an indirect ultimatum. If You were going to marry him he's worth waiting for, this is a lesson in patience. Compromises are something that should be discussed and considered. Make your goals (Together)! J.S.
Damn Steve, he finally gives dudes some love. Of course it's when I want him to tell her to move in and come find me. She's gorgeous. Good luck to them.
All I can say how great Mr.Harvey is. Reaching that point of ur life where u connect stages of ur life and Criticize ur self that open take a lot of courage and self tolerance.
Young ladies tend to fall in love with the "The Wedding Day" and the gown and all the hoopla that goes into preparing for their day the day they have dreamed of every since they where little girls playing with the Bridal Dolls. This is a blessing in disguise for you with him having "cold feet or WHATEVER". Take your time young lady and just know the Lord does not bless mess. Your Boaz will find you when the time is right. Be patient my dear.
This is a perfect example. Men and women dont know much about the other gender. We think, speak and live differently. Instead of hating, we need to help eachother.
"Men have a financial clock" hit so hard. So many jobs take time to build into careers, not to mention college if that's your path. It's better to have yourself together before being with anybody, period. A lot of people say they want this and that, but it really does take time, especially when you're young. Getting a high paying job does not mean it's the job you want or that you'll keep it. Try to get yourself together first before thinking you can give it your all because you may not have much. Do what you can to earn, save, and develop your skills to become the person you want to be, then you'll truly have something to share.
oh you didnt get it. Theres a difference between "everything figured out" and fully ready to provide for your family. I can tell you i figured everything out but still not ready for marriage because i still live in a small appartment and didnt save enough money to go through bad times. i been trough a lot of bad times yet, and thats why i know i need to have it together.
@@groshow9501 Not trying to make some assumption on whether you are ready for marriage or not... but for thousands of years people were getting married and having kids and they lived day to day by hunting/farming/scavenging or barely doing enough to trade goods for food. Funny how things have changed in the minds of so many people in the last 80~ years. People want all the reward without the risk. Then they get mad and depressed when their low risk choices in their 20s and even 30s backfire on them and they end up alone.
@@Sweetheart0189 no she just needs to be patient like Harvy said. So you want her to leave a man she's built a relationship who needs a little time to give her everything she wants? Sounds toxic to me
Great video Steve. I can majority relate to this situation. I just got out of college with my BS Diploma. I couldn't work for 7 years because of a heart attack I had from my birth control pills. I'm now healthy too work, I am working on my resume and cover letters. My boo has been a single breadwinner in our relationship. I want to get married to my boo terribly. Every time I asked him about marriage he would freeze. Before this video, I couldn't figure it out. Now I understand he is waiting till we finally in a better place 👌❤. We already in a 10-year relationship so patience in my cause is worth it.
This just spoke to me on so many levels. Nine years with my partner and no baby or married I just keep getting told when the time is right! Always thought maybe something wrong with me. ❤️
Yes You are a TREASURE Matt 13:44 Parable of the Man and the TREASURE in the field put it back went and Sold ALL HE HAD to Get the TREASURE Man is JESUS You are HIS BELOVED CHOSEN Hidden TREASURE Purest GOLD Highly Valued INValuable Priceless
The only thing with helping HIM getting where he wants, is that when he is there, he might leave you for a another woman! ( a more glamorous one) 😊.....and forget that you where the one by his side all those years supporting him.
The term "Financial Clock" is damn relatable. I am going to get a job but I do have a bigger goal and achieving that will give me things Steve mentioned. I know you can't be doing this all your life but reaching a practical threshold is necessary.
I agree slow it down. Even if you're not married and don't have kids at a certain age. You need to be happy within yourself. Lots of us want to be married and have kids, if it doesn't happen, it's ok. I've seen persons rush into it and are now divorce and a single parent. Bye Felicia...I'm good.
There's nothing that indicated she 'rushed him'. HE PROPOSED - meaning HE asked HER. He shouldn't have done that if he knew he wasn't ready or didn't want it.
I liked this video bc it makes me see things from the other side of the coin. When I met my bf he said he wanted to marry me, have a family and live happily ever after, but as time went on that started changing. We realized we were not ready for that commitment yet but he was the first one to say so. When he changed his mind I started doubting myself and thinking what I possibly did wrong, I started blaming myself. When someone starts doubting about you, you feel like you’re not enough. You’re not enough of their love, you’re not pretty enough, or smart enough, you’re just not enough of anything and that creates insecurities. It’s important to see both sides of the coin bc trust me, someone who has to go through that, goes in a lot of psychological distress bc you never know what’s gonna happen or when they’re gonna change their mind again. And I wish I was as easy as just stepping out….
That paper drop at 4:05 was the most environmentally friendly thing I've ever seen. Better than a mic drop. No damage to the object in hand & is biodegradable & recyclable. 🤣👍💛
I recently watched a series on Facebook called “Couch Conversations” (similar to Jada Pinkett’s ‘Red Table’ as far as honesty)-where some intelligent and dynamic couples discuss relationship issues. This particular convo was titled “Is marriage necessary?” Most of the talk was precisely about the lady’s question. Interestingly enough, none of the men talked about Steve’s response as the reason for their unreadiness or unwillingness to initially commit to marriage. Rather, the consensus was that they wanted to ‘sow their wild oats’ first. They wanted and expected the ladies to wait for them while they did so. The men were honest and woke enough at that point in their lives to admit that they were selfish. They admitted much more. Though I don’t disagree with Steve’s POV, (💕me some Steve), however, guys have more than one reason as to why they’re afraid to commit. Blessings to y’all.
When he proposed, that was when he should of thought about that stuff Steve mentioned. The lady accepted knowing that she was committing to growing with him on the journey of life even though he didn't own a lot. The guy should be happy that this beautiful woman was not materialistic but still cared and wanted him. This is the first time I disagree with Steve's answer.
When you in love with a women and want her, and all she talk about is marriage you began to think its time to get married. That is why he proposed. He wanted to make her happy. And 7 months is not long at all. Women sometimes need to be more patient.
I love this man. I don't know any german show host who is so unique, so honest, tells what he thinks with such a naturalness but without being sassy or upsetting. There are a few who are really great but Steve Harvey is much better than them, although I know him only from YT.
😂😂😂 I love the moments Steve realises his advice is good. Never gets old😂
We've got the same name!!
Trish 💀
Well hello Trish and Trish 😂😂😂
That's partial advice.
his advice is only good depending on the person hearing it.. I would be way more willing to marry someone if I was the average joe, compared to if I was loaded with lots of options...
Biological Clock VS Financial Clock. Oh how I love Steve's terms..
I am a woman and i do the opposite. I'm on a financial clock
He says what women want to hear. But the honest truth is if he was sure she's the one, he would have gotten married a long gone ago. Money has nothing to do with it.
@@vitorfernandes651 money has everything to do with it to take care of her, Steve's right
@@vitorfernandes651 Depends on where you live Vitor. In America it's money 1st Love 2nd. A sad truth I wished I would of realized earlier. Peace and Blessings.
@Hallam Dyal well most times when you are at the bottom with a women, you stay there. Or if you climb to the top, you go for another woman, because you have more options
i like how steve is honest and he doesn't put guys in the bad spotlight for something every guy can relate to
So what he says is true? He wont feel ready unless Hes financially stable?
@@SunnySummer777 this is late but yes it's true. Even when we are single we still struggle when we aren't where we thought we'd be. Especially if you had teachers & family that tell you "you should be this by this age" or " I was already doing this at your ave". That's where stress, overworking & anger starts to grow because at that point we feel there's no one seeing what they're going through.
Correct
@@SunnySummer777 yes its very true
@@walkemdownwita.5juju i see poor men who aren't financially stable marry all the time though....?🤔 what's up with that?
As a young man this advice was useful for me to cause I’m 24 and I haven’t found my purpose in life yet. I work my ass off everyday and I’m very financially disciplined I just haven’t found that clear path Steve talks about. This is very true for men to feel complete. Men we have to just keep working towards our goals and strive to be the best person we can be every single day 💯
Yessir
Absolutely true!
All the best
Exactly, and this is what redpill teaches us men. Especially for those who want a relationship
While a girl will make you feel fully complete, you have to be half complete on your end first.
Just remember you’re never gonna have everything perfect. Don’t lose a great girl cause everything it not just so. Some things can be built together.
SWEETIE...YOU SHOULD THANK HIM FOR HIS HONESTY HE COULD HAVE LEFT HER AT THE ALTER!!
I don't know about thanking him, But I would definitely God for showing me this sooner than later.
Angelique Esprit 😎
SWEETIE...SAMETHING!! SMH
He wasn't even honest cuz he still didn't tell her why he prospone the wedding
Debbie debz 😎
SWEETIE...I BELIEVE HE HAD A CHANGE HEART💏 ABOUT MARRIAGE! !
@@phillipswatson3452 if u have a change of heart u should have the guts to tell her the reason why and not leave her hanging so that is plain childish
I think this was the best advice I ever heard!!
Facts
Sounds like he has another side piece...
Leah Rhodes It sure is! Couples have to help & support each other; especially while engaged or married!
He spoke straight facts.
As a 24 yr old man, he definitely hit the nail on the head
Steve's advice was so damn true! My parents dated for 15 years because my dad wanted to have enough money and a good job to provide for my mom and for future kids (aka me).
15 years? More like he was waiting to find someone better, but in the end settled for what he got. But sure, the romantic version sounds so much better.
@@Mizwanderer1989 Disliked, that's quite an assumption on Morgan's parents. Every situation is different.
FYI, I have 2 friends who dated 14 years before marriage. She was a doctor, he was an engineer. He worked his butt off to earn as much as her before they got married. She admires and loves his hard work.
@@freestylepunk Assumption? More like recognising a pattern. I have seen it many many times. When people settle and finally decide on the "romantic" version, gullible people ah and oh over their stories. But that is all it is. A nicely packaged story. One doesn't wait a lifetime to start a family with their loved ones because they don't have their perfect job or career. They might delay having kids, which is reasonable to not bring a new life in poverty, but anything else is just excuses.
@We or you know they can be able to afford the stuff they need for their family
@We If you think that they would stay with someone they don't love for 15 years then you don't understand how love works
He said things that many men wanted to say but never really could.
29 year old here, yes he did
Legit
Lol Steve so proud of himself 🤣
From where he was in he twenties to what he accomplished? He must be proud and be a good example for many people
Sometimes the desire blinds us, she desperately wants to be a wife & a mother that's great but you should ask yourself is my partner ready for that too, don't just think of your needs look to the other part of the relationship as well
*THANK* *YOU* !! Marriage brings up a lot of pressure & many men want their life to be headed in the right direction at least before they say "I do".
Exactly he could love her too much that he gives her everything she wants but sacrificing his own happiness, thats when he will regret later on and then leave her. The grass aint greener on the otherside of marriage but its worth it.
@@icycici well then dont propose if you're nor in that direction it is his responsibility as a man to Express his reasons for wanting to wait before publicly claiming a woman as his intended wife only to ask for a postponement without communicating a reason.
@@pleaseenteryournamehere9593 Very unlikely. More likely is he don't love her.
Amen
Even after 3 years of hearing this I always loved Steve's advice from a man's view. We always want to make sure we have everything ready.
Wow JESUS CHRIST IS our LORD and SAVIOR and Go after Our LORD JESUS 1st SEEK YE 1st the Kingdom of GOD and He'll take care of the rest.
Sky, agreed brother.
This really hits home. My brother was in a very similar situation, he was in a relationship for about 6-7 years, they were high school sweethearts. She told him she wanted to have kids already because everyone around her was already getting married and having kids. The biggest one being her twin sister had gotten married already and moved out of the house. They had constant arguments about it, he would come to me for some type of advice, but my brother was just not ready for that type of commitment even though he loved her very much. It sucked because she just couldn’t wait for him to finish his school/get his degree, it was like a thing she wanted to happen immediately. They broke up and within a few weeks she was already dating someone else and engaged ( I will never understand this). But in the end it was probably the best thing to happen to my brother , he’s starting to take his future more seriously and knows what he wants to do in life, and as a career, he’s been working really hard towards it now.
Yeesh. I’m glad that your brother is doing well. The girl really was set on getting married right away. She’s probably just giving it too much priority because she feels like as long as she is married it will be wonderful, and feels if she isn’t married things are terrible (feels inferior to peers, doesn’t have what she feels will make her life complete, etc.) She didn’t give her feelings enough thought. You’ve got to challenge your feelings often times to make sure they won’t lead you into trouble.
@@danielglidewell Aww thanks! I’m glad he’s doing better to. When he came to my mom and me we had a long talk, we all know that in her mind, fantasy will probably be better than reality. We hope the best for her as we aren’t spiteful, but you can’t help but wonder if one day she will realize what a big mistake she made, and there’s no going back now. It would just be too disrespectful to him and our family (seeing how hurt he was) if she tried to come back.
I'll be spiteful for you all. I hope she Ends up in a divorce and the dad gets full custody if they have kids
For a bro's high school sweetheart, she sure didn't love him enough to wait and stay with him until he was ready like one. A fortunate and, somehow, unfortunate bro
@@dj11o9er so true :(
It's a good advice but he could have some other reason too, I think she should be a little careful.
She sounds like a very sweet girl and she is so pretty. May God bless her heart!
But he isn't the bad guy, just wasn't ready at least he told her before they got married
I was thinking the same thing....there isn't enough information to say that the issue is just that he wasn't financially ready....he could have felt like Maybe he didn't love her enough to see himself married to her for the rest of his life but didn't have the heart to tell her but still he keeps in touch cuz he doesn't wanna fully let her go...Idk....I just felt like Maybe the solution wasnt Just clear cut like Steve made it seem
He prob has another chick
No. Steve was spot on
Shes not a good women if shes this pushy about her needs .. The guy should punt and run ...
He was so on point you'd even think it was staged, he's a wiseman. Respect to him
I didnt have much when me and ny wife married. We are building together. I struggled with wanting to provide more,but God wanted us to grow together. Sometimes us men got to put our ego and do the right thing
Yes women can do much more these days for themselves. Its not all on a mans shoulders anymore.
You have a really big ego if you believe there's a god and that god cares about you and your partner.
So? Nobody asked for your opinion either.
It's not always about Ego, it's the "complete" feeling of being a man and wanting to provide for his woman. That's not a crime, if he doesn't feel like he's ready then why bulldoze your way through and hope for the best. He want to be able to give her something nice and memorable, that's not a crime
human being, you're such an idiot. I never said I saw myself as a god. Where did you get that from?
"Help him get to where he wants, so he can help you get to where you want" Very true 💯💯💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥
This makes so much sense!!! All the men I've dated have told me this exact thing. 'i don't want to get married until I'm financially secure" it makes sense... I'm going to support this man with whatever he needs to do to get to where he wants to be
You go out to eat, he can't pay, y'all can't leave
There's dishes in the back, he gotta roll up his sleeves
But while y'all washin', watch him
He gon' make it to a Benz out of that Datsun
He got that ambition, baby, look at his eyes
This week he moppin' floors, next week it's the fries
So stick by his side
I know there's dudes ballin', and yeah, that's nice
And they gonna keep callin' and tryin', but you stay right, girl
*And when you get on, he'll leave yo' ass for a white girl*
This is Wrong ^
She should have thanked him for his honesty and told him that when he was ready for marriage, she hopes he finds someone that makes him happy. But, it won't be her. She has every right to want what she wants, and she has every right to not want to be with someone who doesn't align with her desires. The same way he has the right to not do something that doesn't align with his desires. He has the right to say he's not ready. And she has the right to say I am, and when you are I wish you the best.
I think that this is a conversation nobody teach us to have. I think in general we expect men to desire what we want always, and honestly, they are really simply human beings. It’s valid that someone is not ready in the moment, and if she thinks she can wait, she can do it. It depends on what they agreed. I think we also have to stop being so harsh with woman’s decision, sometimes it’s not a waste of time wait for a man, is an agreement. But it’s a couple decision. Not every story has a bad ending or the same context.
Not only is she gorgeous, she has a good head on her shoulders and her priorities are wholesome. A wife and a mother. She's a dying breed. Whoever finds her and makes an honest woman out of her has found an eternal treasure.
She also knows her value!
Yeah yeah yeah but girls like her will get mad until they get what she wants which wouldn't be the best for a relationship or marriage
@@davidg5965 she doesn't seem mad here. Just needed to understand his perspective
@@davidg5965 She was probably heartbroken by her fiance wanting to delay the wedding, so it's understandable why she would be scared to talk with him about it. I'm not saying she was wrong, but she wasn't right either. The fact that she was willing to ask for another man's advice and hear him out shows that she still loves her fiance. Tell me, have you ever had a girlfriend? Have you ever been engaged?
@@dedsecaffiliate1979 yeah I have a girlfriend but when we have problems we have heart to heart conversations and don't on TV or let everyone know lol, I Definitely get what you're saying though
4:05 Steve realize his advice is FIRE 🔥 😂
Look up"Steve's advice saved this relationship" and see an update on this girl...
U're the real MVP 👐💯
was the next video that played
I love it when Steve actually gives his audience some GOOD advice.
Why would you want to be with someone thats not on the same page as you though? You shouldnt have to sacrifice your goals in life to please someone else.
I had one woman tell me that she asked her man over and over again if they were ever going to tie the knot or have kids because that's something she really wanted in life , and he always had some sort of excuse. Well guess what? She hit a certain age and started menopause and was no longer able to have children and her time was wasted And now she resents him because of it.
On another note, you need to communicate. Make what you want in life clear from the start. And either work things out and compromise , or if you two can't be on the same page then dont be together. Don't waste eachothers time. If you dont want to follow on the same path you dont belong together.
Dont waste her time, and dont pressure him. Simple.
Damnn.. How long they together for she sound mad 🤣
Damn. Sound almost like my scenario.
One of the few times I agree with Steve. I love him and he’s hilarious, but he usually says nonsense about us men. He’s 100% correct here though 👍
i agree
100% agreed. I am trying to get their myself, and I feel I can not get married until I have everything together to support my woman.
do it for yourself first and foremost. do not do it for a woman.
Steve is a clown...he spews his nonsense to appease these women. It's all about building his brand brainwashing these low esteem women.
I agree with you but I think most Time why he be little us men Is so that woman will listen to him
I wish there was an update in this couple! I hope they’re doing well and are happy.
I was so like this with my ex... she wanted me to propose during uni. She wanted to have kids in 3 years. I wanted to wait till I had a job to propose. Guys really do think financially and it’s taken Steve for me to see that I do this subconsciously 👏🏼
Me too ✋
"He trippin'!" I just love the way he said that. ☺️
I literally watch this at least once a day because at 25 I'm going through what she is going and not only am I losing hope in myself but in the relationship
U stupid! Where's your father? It's more to life getting married. Where's your money stop depending on a man to take care of you.
You’re young
@@lifeisbeautiful9455 25 ain’t that young, she needs to find someone to marry asap
Decide if you want to stay or not from a strength perspective, rather than fear. I stayed in a stagnant relationship for years and by the time I was 29, I thought that if I leave, I'll never find someone better. But I left bc I favored my biological clock. Six months later, I found my husband and we are happy and whole.
This is SO spot on. I've heard/seen so many people getting married too early, having kids and absolutely dragging themselves financially. I won't be getting married until I KNOW I'm ready either! I want to enjoy life not work 12hrs just to get by and support my family. I'm sure my future partner and kids would want the same.
I know so many moms that are single and they just do OF
Or they baby-trapped rich nerds who have no female experience so they can be taken care of.
The depth of the wisdow Steve is so often able to deliver is jawdropping... Sometimes it even sting the eyes like onions
Am so happy to be born in an era with Steve Harvey as a big part of it, he really helps me and am sure millions of people out there. Thanks mr Steve Harvey.
Steve I love you sooo much ❤️ You are like a Dad I never had. God bless you.
What is the purpose of PROPOSING if he knew he wasnt ready?
Angelina Adoko so he can lock hisself in no one else get her
To make her happy.
Angelina Adoko 😎
SWEETIE...SOME MEN GIVE WOMEN A RING TO SHUT THEM UP...REAL TALK I HAVE SEEN IT HAPPEN MANY OF TIMES!!
To string yo goofy ass on a little longer 😂
Theres a thing called a 'hush ring'which ive heard in some reality shows where the man proposes to shut the woman up about marriage. Some men are very deceptive
Steve is 100% correct about us men right here.
Been almost 2 years with my boyfriend. Not living together, but he wants to. Not that I dont, but he's $47,000 in student debt(also has more with a parent student loan). And he's not sure where exactly he's going career wise.... he'll be 34 years old soon, I'm 26. what should I do?:/
@@SunnySummer777 don't do anything because you feel pressured
It might also be.......he don't want to be tied down. Or he want more girls. Or what Steve say. A lot of reasons.
Or maybe he does want to marry her he just doesn't want to rush. There's nothing wrong with getting married when your not completely financially stable bc they can both help one another. Now a child is a different case. He probably didn't tell her bc he knew that she'll still rush him into marriage.
@@morenikeogunsusi9579 Yes, just like what Steve say. A lot of reasons.
@@morenikeogunsusi9579 still rush? BS.
Bajan Strokes Survivor Steve should have ask more questions than just being the "i know every answer because i know the nature of the average man so i know your man particularly "
He's 27. Far too young to marry. They should live together and be happy. There's no rush.
I needed to hear this, because I lost the Love of my life when I broke up with her. Simply because I couldn't provide. I wish her the best 😔
Steve felt that one! People talk about Steve this and that, but Steve (like everyone else) is human and through him helping others is helping him with his stuff in the past. Steve you alright with me! My mama always watch you as well as I! I want me and my mama be in your seats at your talk show one day soon!! 🧡💛💚💜❤️ what you do Mr.Steve!!
That was beautiful, he deserves to be where he is, man he’s good!
Damn she is so beautiful 😍
Steve thanks for that advice..am watching from Kenya
Someone is going to pick Steve up on another Show!! That's his Gift!!!
Second OpinionI hope so. He is truly gifted in the area of knowing how to respond. He gives great advice and he is hilarious.
That why I say they shouldnt cancel his show. He give good advice and i love seeing him and his suits.
Steve , you just spoke my heart out , wish I could hug you. You are the best, your videos gives me motivation. Thanks a lot for spreading the positivity, thanks a ton. Love from India ❤.
Of all the pageantry talk shows and host...this is some of the most genuine, authentic, honest, direct and blatant solid advice/perspective ever televised. I’m surprised the net work execs allowed this to air.
I know someone who did the same exact thing. The girl didn't contact him anymore. He has a good job now but still not married. Some men have commitment issues. Period. He is going to do the same to someone else.
It's not that easy to find someone to marry..
He deserved a standing ovation
Steve Harvey is a real father and truly knows how to converse with young people, when it truly matters. Well done Steve, we can all take a leaf out if your book.😃😃😃
You are truly a teacher Steve,honestly wish to be part of your show in person.always blessing my life .
My gf waited 7 years for me to get my life together. I have a great job with benefits and most importantly I can provide and protect her and our future family. I just bought her a $7k ring cash and now I plan on giving it to her b4 we buy our first house. God is great 👍 🙌 🙏 ❤
How so sweet. I really am so happy for both of you. Seems you guys are amazing people. Wish all the best for you and your girlfriend 🤗🙏 and happy wedding as well! ☺️
I love you Zi Zi. Can we get to know each other?
Wish I had someone that would wait for me that long to get my life together and still love me and support me and not complain that I don't give her enough to or affection when all I'm trying to do is become financially stable enough to do what she an I want to do together
This is ABSOLUTELY the BEST advice ever! It’s not always a negative reason why a guy won’t commit, like playing games etc... this is SOUL deep people! Trust what your intuition tells you. It doesn’t ever lie. Wishing everyone well on their journeys.
Steve you're a great person and that advice hit so hard,I love you.
I love Steve!!! I watch him every single day and it makes my whole day!!!
I see this as an oppurtunity for the couple. As a man, I will cherish my partner more, if we go through this difficult episode together. Facing the challenge together; failing at times and finally succeeding with the support of your partner will build and forge an unbreakable foundation to the relationship. Wishing them the best!
I CAN RESPECT THIS HEY STEVE!
Walk that Walk, Steve!!😎
Amazing advice. I got married at 22 and felt 75% ready financially. We had a rough 2 years at the beginning. 7 years later I’m 95% where I want to be and now separated 😂
☹️so sorry
Oops...
Oof, that had a twist. Wouldn’t laugh about it either, kinda cringe
@@Popzugzugz it’s funny how life works. You live and learn and create a better future. “Life only makes sense if you force it to.”
Sorry bud, things gets better.
Man I needed to see this🙏🏽 Get yourself right first before you can get/treat somebody else right
Steve is right. Men are designed to protect and provide and they get nervous when they can't do that. Tell it Steve!!!!!
Donna Banks this is where people are misinformed. Men are taught to protect and provide not born to
@@ssm1559 aren't men hunters though?? Naturally?🤔 which then makes sense, men know what they want
@Sagittarius Flame no they aren’t. No gender is born to ‘do’ anything m, it’s all learned behaviour
My Mom and Dad were dead broke when they got married, it was some of the happiest days of their lives! They made it happen. Life shouldn't be about the "stuff". Not the guys fault, society is putting unrealistic material expectations on couples. Get married. Work hard. Be thirfty. Make some kids. The "stuff" will come in time. My Mom and Dad made four kids - none of us have been to jail or been pregnant out of wedlock. Two of their kids are Vets. We all vote. Lots of memories and good times and they weren't financially stable till Dad was in his early sixties and retiring. Love conquers all.
I totally get how she feels. I have expressed that to my boyfriend before and I told him that I’ll be patient with him and that if I don’t see that later on in our relationship then I will end a relationship with respect his decision. But this year and lately I have not mentioned it to him because at the end I don’t want it to turn out as a disappointment
“I’m gonna cry 😭”
Steve: 👁️👄👁️🧍🏾♂️ “No, don’t do dat”
Don't let your inhibitions be your guide. Steve made an excellent point. Relax and just have fun until he's ready to meet the family structure you will need. 60 years is a long time to be with someone, just make sure it is not full of regrets because you either didn't call him back or is forcing an indirect ultimatum. If You were going to marry him he's worth waiting for, this is a lesson in patience. Compromises are something that should be discussed and considered. Make your goals (Together)! J.S.
Looking at your Steve’s show, i forget all my stress for a moment. Big up uncle Steve 👏🏻👏🏻
Damn Steve, he finally gives dudes some love. Of course it's when I want him to tell her to move in and come find me. She's gorgeous. Good luck to them.
I didn't have any of this and still proposed!
And? ...
@@JohnFekoloid 😂😂😂😂😂🤣
So what happened after the proposal?
U want a cookie 🍪
Thank you Steve for telling me the obvious of what a man is to do to prepare to be a man
michelle thomas Read the comments. A lot of people don’t get it.
It is obvious... but most questions we ask others about our relationships, we already know what we should do.
All I can say how great Mr.Harvey is. Reaching that point of ur life where u connect stages of ur life and Criticize ur self that open take a lot of courage and self tolerance.
Young ladies tend to fall in love with the "The Wedding Day" and the gown and all the hoopla that goes into preparing for their day the day they have dreamed of every since they where little girls playing with the Bridal Dolls. This is a blessing in disguise for you with him having "cold feet or WHATEVER". Take your time young lady and just know the Lord does not bless mess. Your Boaz will find you when the time is right. Be patient my dear.
Yes Amen and Amen!!! ❤✌
Preach brother Steve... It's hard for us men... Not that we don't want to but we wanna be everything for her and what she deserves
This is a perfect example. Men and women dont know much about the other gender. We think, speak and live differently. Instead of hating, we need to help eachother.
I’ve spent all morning watching Steve Harvey and I literally just love hearing him preach 😂
Steve, That Guy gonna love u and owe you his lifetime. love you man.
This is one of the best word I have heard..I wish my girl can listen to this😔😔
She is gorgeous ❤
I love Steve! So always on point! Don’t “support him financially” just be there for him and if his not ready move on!
Steve’s walk is legendary. L E G E N D A R Y I tell you🙌🏼🙌🏼🔥🔥🔥🔥😂
He is spot on. Absolutely sport on😊
"Men have a financial clock" hit so hard. So many jobs take time to build into careers, not to mention college if that's your path. It's better to have yourself together before being with anybody, period. A lot of people say they want this and that, but it really does take time, especially when you're young. Getting a high paying job does not mean it's the job you want or that you'll keep it. Try to get yourself together first before thinking you can give it your all because you may not have much. Do what you can to earn, save, and develop your skills to become the person you want to be, then you'll truly have something to share.
That was such great wisdom right there!!! Omg he was so spot on!!!! ❤️❤️❤️
27 year old man is too young but a 27 woman has to have EVERYTHING figured out
oh you didnt get it. Theres a difference between "everything figured out" and fully ready to provide for your family. I can tell you i figured everything out but still not ready for marriage because i still live in a small appartment and didnt save enough money to go through bad times. i been trough a lot of bad times yet, and thats why i know i need to have it together.
That’s why she needs an older man like 35
@@groshow9501 Not trying to make some assumption on whether you are ready for marriage or not... but for thousands of years people were getting married and having kids and they lived day to day by hunting/farming/scavenging or barely doing enough to trade goods for food.
Funny how things have changed in the minds of so many people in the last 80~ years. People want all the reward without the risk. Then they get mad and depressed when their low risk choices in their 20s and even 30s backfire on them and they end up alone.
Oh Jenny it's very clear you do not get what steve was saying lol
@@Sweetheart0189 no she just needs to be patient like Harvy said. So you want her to leave a man she's built a relationship who needs a little time to give her everything she wants? Sounds toxic to me
Just talk it out & work it out. Steve is Right. Best advice from Mr.Harvey 😎.
He should’ve waited until he got himself together to propose
Why?
Knowing how women are. She probably told him to propose or she was leaving
She was probably pressuring him.
You have no idea the pressure he would be under Day after day...
claude lamothe
You say most women are selfish, I say ALL men are selfish. Now who’s got it worse?
Great video Steve. I can majority relate to this situation. I just got out of college with my BS Diploma. I couldn't work for 7 years because of a heart attack I had from my birth control pills. I'm now healthy too work, I am working on my resume and cover letters. My boo has been a single breadwinner in our relationship. I want to get married to my boo terribly. Every time I asked him about marriage he would freeze. Before this video, I couldn't figure it out. Now I understand he is waiting till we finally in a better place 👌❤. We already in a 10-year relationship so patience in my cause is worth it.
This just spoke to me on so many levels. Nine years with my partner and no baby or married I just keep getting told when the time is right! Always thought maybe something wrong with me. ❤️
Yes You are a TREASURE Matt 13:44 Parable of the Man and the TREASURE in the field put it back went and Sold ALL HE HAD to Get the TREASURE Man is JESUS You are HIS BELOVED CHOSEN Hidden TREASURE Purest GOLD Highly Valued INValuable Priceless
That is a long time. You should make an ultimatum at that point.
Steve’s face @ 0:03 ! Such a beautiful girl, and Steve is right. That’s why I love 💕 listening to him. Bc has wisdom on his belt now.
The only thing with helping HIM getting where he wants, is that when he is there, he might leave you for a another woman! ( a more glamorous one)
😊.....and forget that you where the one by his side all those years supporting him.
Did that happen to you?:/
A lifetime of learning in one clip, Thx SH!
"Ok, nah don't do that....this just hey Steve" haha
The term "Financial Clock" is damn relatable. I am going to get a job but I do have a bigger goal and achieving that will give me things Steve mentioned. I know you can't be doing this all your life but reaching a practical threshold is
necessary.
the female rushed him to get to marriage, she need to slow it down. steve is right
zero yell she did instead of talking to him about it
I agree slow it down. Even if you're not married and don't have kids at a certain age. You need to be happy within yourself. Lots of us want to be married and have kids, if it doesn't happen, it's ok. I've seen persons rush into it and are now divorce and a single parent. Bye Felicia...I'm good.
There's nothing that indicated she 'rushed him'. HE PROPOSED - meaning HE asked HER. He shouldn't have done that if he knew he wasn't ready or didn't want it.
@@silvershadow7655 THANK YOU! 👏🏾
She knows what she wants clearky he is not on the same oage therefore she should move on and find someone who is ready for the same thing as her.
I liked this video bc it makes me see things from the other side of the coin. When I met my bf he said he wanted to marry me, have a family and live happily ever after, but as time went on that started changing. We realized we were not ready for that commitment yet but he was the first one to say so. When he changed his mind I started doubting myself and thinking what I possibly did wrong, I started blaming myself. When someone starts doubting about you, you feel like you’re not enough. You’re not enough of their love, you’re not pretty enough, or smart enough, you’re just not enough of anything and that creates insecurities. It’s important to see both sides of the coin bc trust me, someone who has to go through that, goes in a lot of psychological distress bc you never know what’s gonna happen or when they’re gonna change their mind again. And I wish I was as easy as just stepping out….
Thank you Steve! This is such good advice!
Love this! ❤️
That paper drop at 4:05 was the most environmentally friendly thing I've ever seen. Better than a mic drop. No damage to the object in hand & is biodegradable & recyclable. 🤣👍💛
I recently watched a series on Facebook called “Couch Conversations” (similar to Jada Pinkett’s ‘Red Table’ as far as honesty)-where some intelligent and dynamic couples discuss relationship issues. This particular convo was titled “Is marriage necessary?” Most of the talk was precisely about the lady’s question. Interestingly enough, none of the men talked about Steve’s response as the reason for their unreadiness or unwillingness to initially commit to marriage. Rather, the consensus was that they wanted to ‘sow their wild oats’ first. They wanted and expected the ladies to wait for them while they did so. The men were honest and woke enough at that point in their lives to admit that they were selfish. They admitted much more. Though I don’t disagree with Steve’s POV, (💕me some Steve), however, guys have more than one reason as to why they’re afraid to commit. Blessings to y’all.
Or maybe its the chance to lose half your wealth and destroy your social, professional, mental and financial life whenever she feels like it
One of his best ones!👏🏽👊🏾👌🏾💯💯💯
That is great Steve. I love your show. Am learning a lot from you. Keep it up.
Steve just gave the realest advice ever 💯💯❤️
When he proposed, that was when he should of thought about that stuff Steve mentioned. The lady accepted knowing that she was committing to growing with him on the journey of life even though he didn't own a lot. The guy should be happy that this beautiful woman was not materialistic but still cared and wanted him. This is the first time I disagree with Steve's answer.
True
i agree. he proposed to her based on emotion and 'love'
AMEN
Second you on this
When you in love with a women and want her, and all she talk about is marriage you began to think its time to get married. That is why he proposed. He wanted to make her happy. And 7 months is not long at all. Women sometimes need to be more patient.
She's so beautiful
The guy wants to play games. He doesn't want commitment...at the moment
what is steve talking about,he proposed to her,but now he has interest in another woman behind her back, that is why the cold feet
He doesnt
I love this man. I don't know any german show host who is so unique, so honest, tells what he thinks with such a naturalness but without being sassy or upsetting.
There are a few who are really great but Steve Harvey is much better than them, although I know him only from YT.