I’ve known Chris Phillips for 6 years. We were great friends in Mississippi, and even though he has schizophrenia, that never changed the way he treated me. We always talked about music, ghosts, Magic the Gathering, and other things. One day he said he was moving to California, and just vanished for two years. You have no idea how great it was to just randomly hear from him on Facebook again. We talk all the time and pick up exactly where we left off. Miss ya, Chris. Come home soon so we can play Magic. Thank you so much for letting my buddy tell his story
Where at in MS? It made me happy when he mentioned he was here. There's really very very few people here worth talking to. When he made the comparison to the game Go - I knew he was interesting lol. But he needs to get off of the meth. I've known and lost so many people to it. Entirely too many.
@@Aromatic.Bleach Chris and I lived in Brandon, MS in Rankin County. Just 20 minutes east of Jackson. I spent the first 20 years of my life there, and he spent 8 years there when he moved from Pensacola. He meant the world to me. Seriously
I know Chris personally. I was the boss he vacationed with to Vegas. Chris lived with us for the last year before he fell into psychosis. He asked if I'd take him to the store on Christmas Eve night 2019 in Vegas. He got out of the car while talking on the phone with his brother & walked away into the night after a year of living and working together every day. The last thing he said to me that night was that he wasn't going to go down as a pedophile, as if I had accused him of it, which I hadn't. We literally went from talking about sodas and chips to alleged accusations of pedophilia, then he was gone. He told me years later that he went behind the gas station, then took off running toward the strip. That was the true beginning of Chris' psychosis. We never knew he was struggling as we drove cross country on vacation. He never told us what he was going through. We also never saw him again. Chris contacted us 2 years later in early 2023 when he was in "the program", but we haven't heard back from him for a few months since earlier this year. Glad to see this, and that he's alive. People may just see a crazy person, but we know Chris and how smart he is. While he's definitely different now, it's still Chris and it's clear that he knows who he is. What has happened to this man is a tragedy, given his potential. Thank you for verifying our friend is ok. It's the only clarity we have now.
Chris was definitely one of a kind. I was so glad when we all found out that he was alive and breathing. The second I found out I called you. I hope he can go on for another interview. Fancy meeting you here, John 👍
@@shila8379 Chris was into crystal & LSD before we met, but the year before he left, he had left behind all his old friends to work and live with us. He even told us that living with us was like being in recovery. You could say that when he lived with us he was at his best in quite awhile, in our happy home, and working with me every day. I'm a medical technologies engineer and Chris helped us meet the 24 hour on-call demands of that business. We always had to be in full control of our faculties for work, so that's why I don't use drugs. As far as Chris, he didn't use any drugs like that while he stayed with us, but I knew he smoked weed sometimes. We've got kids and wouldn't have allowed hard drugs anywhere near us. Chris did what Chris wanted to do, and we couldn't stop him anymore than anyone else could, but yes, Chris was a recovering addict when he lived with us and has backslidden.
Yes, I thought the same. It is well known, that it can cause psychosis, in particular in younger age. He is older, but as you said, he is maybe prone to it. Good luck to this guy.
I noticed that. It's possible that the problem has been made worse in recent decades by the reduction of CBD content, which is anti-psychotic, through continual hybridising in pursuit of maximum THC yield - from what I gather it's now practically zero in most weed.
@@thomasma8924I don’t care for the framing of that, saying weed causes the psychosis can be misleading though i am familiar with the research and understand why you’d state it in that way. Any psychoactive compound can exaggerate the rate at which a condition reveals itself, the reason I don’t like to say a substance is the cause is because the condition is already there and the experience under that substance triggered an episode. I think it’s important to make these distinctions because we do not want people to be mislead or confused by the literature and be swayed away from potential medicine that could benefit them. Nobody is going to want to try something if they think it can give them a mental illness which is how that framing could be interpreted. It’s important that we are giving out the highest quality information that we can to others about substances because harm reduction is crucial to understand when making an informed decision about taking a substance or recommending one. I had a friend who I used to do a lot of LSD with and for years never had any issues, he had one really rough experience that seemed to effect him more than usual and it wasn’t in a positive way. Over the next few years he continued to take LSD and things only got worse to the point where I wouldn’t trip with him anymore because of how bad he would freak out during those experiences and it was truthfully hard to endure those psychologically. He’s been in and out of mental hospitals since then and I don’t imagine he’s seen any real change for the better, we are no longer friends so I don’t get any current updates. I will add that his mental illness had nothing to do with us not being friends, he got in trouble with the police and tried to set me up and that’s not something I can have around. My point being I had no idea he had an underlying mental illness until it was too late, nobody could have known unless he had went and had a diagnosis done but even then if he wasn’t showing any symptoms why would you think to be tested? We aren’t going to be able to protect everyone but what we can do is offer high quality information to give people the best opportunity at making an informed decision on something so serious
I have schizophrenia. When I did lsd I wouldn't come out of the trip like everyone else. It's like the door was open, but rather than looking, I walked through it. Now, the two worlds are one, as I don't know where the door was that I entered through.
I worked on the psych ward in Florida for 25 years. Chris, you’re one of my people and I feel like I know you. Take care of yourself, I wish you the best.
@@bboynewsboy991there are things we just don’t know yet but we’re just living in a rotating traveling planet in space so a lot will be revealed eventually that we don’t yet know.
A client I worked with said the saddest thing to me. “Mental illness stole my whole life from me”. He has been talking about his successful lawyer brother with a wife and kids. He told me they were exactly alike growing up and could have become exactly the same. But his schizophrenia hit at 19 and that was it. He could never dream of a normal life. His hallucinations won’t let him. What a sad world we live in sometimes.
My brother suffers with schizophrenia and I’ve worked with adult males with the same diagnosis. What I find most amazing is the similarities of voices, concepts, thoughts, directions, concerns, heroism, symbolism, afflictions. It makes you want to map it out and see how it’s possible. Thank you Chris for sharing your experience. You are loved.
I was kind of annoyed how Mark kept saying "that's crazy". I must have a little schizophrenia myself because I understood what he was talking about and wanted to ask certain questions to get him to explain his thoughts more. It's not totally random nonsense. There's a method to his madness.
@@stopthephilosophicalzombie9017 yes, but that would only encourage him more into madness, I also felt like wanting to know more of his stories but that would mean to only enterntain myself with someone elses illness.
@@adriancastaneda9088 I didn't mean to encourage it but to get a sense for what his triggers were and so forth. Just saying "that's crazy" isn't interesting.
He’s not real and is full of bullshit. He’s a drug addict who fried his brain he was not born with schizophrenia he said he did heavy drugs age 25-27 then became schizo at 29. Just another drug addict.
He reminds me of my friend who passed away, I think he would be his twin if he had shorter hair and a goatee. Mental illness and addiction is so pitiful and painful.
My brother has schizophrenia and it’s so hard to see him wither away. He’s always been one of the smartest and kindest people I know, but turned into a drug addict because of his mental illness because it’s the only thing that distracts his brain from the voices and hallucinations. The system is broken for these people and they are damned to living in the street, jail, or death eventually, I worry about him constantly. Thank you for humanizing humanities most vulnerable. These people need more of a voice and more help than they get.
@@AlistairBalisterIMO - Yes, they are. If you look back historically throughout the ages mental illness has been looked upon as something sinful or bad that the person has brought on himself/herself. In other words, if the person had believed in God a certain way, prayed enough, etc. he/she would not have been punished. Another backward thinking idea was that the devil somehow controlled a person due to his/her moral weakness. That is like saying an individual got diabetes because God was inflicting bad things on a person for some religious infraction. "Modern" health insurance, for the most part, does not address the true issues or help pay for the treatment costs.
It's amazing how on-the-line he is between his delusions, reality, and his own self awareness. I pray he's able to gain control of it and remain able to know what's real and what's in his mind. He definitely seems like a good guy under it all, unfortunately things like meth and staying up for days on end aren't going to help him at all. Would love to see a follow up of this guy in the future
even if im happy to see his work i think mark made a step further interviewing people totally high and make it clear from 3 parties (us, and both himself and the interviewee). even if harder to see, i'd rather prefer to listen to this guy sober, even if it seems difficult lol.
#JeanDupont Lol. This is perfect. At no time during ANY these interviews is your "comfort" the point. The idea is for us to see the person, their problems, how their life experiences do or do not relate to their current or ongoing situation, and to help people understand others & our own selves better. In any interview any time, any one of the interviewees may be on a substance. We gain more from any interview if the person being interviewed is honest. This person was more honest than most people ever are in any type of interview. Think about that. People with schizophrenia are like the general public in the fact that some of them do take illegal or legal substances & some of them don't. We need to have an understanding of what changes may happen in both/all scenarios of people with schizophrenia. The same as we do with people who don't have it.
@@jeandupont4939 "even if it seems difficult" no, then Mark would be the same as the rest of society. Refusing to listen or interact with anyone who falls through the cracks. The beauty of Mark's content is seeing people as they are in that moment, like a photo but in video format. If you are not aware of Mark's previous work you should look it up. You'll understand, then, why he does his interviews this way.
@@micgil4193 interesting take. I hear you, and your description of disease is quite accurate. Though, the Mayo clinic considers schizophrenia a brain disease.
This is so dam sad, praying for Chris fr. Im 25 and also have schizophrenia; he needs to stop doing drugs, even weed. My schizophrenia was caused by weed and it’s sad to see how positive the media portrays weed when it can in fact lead to outcomes like this. Hopefully one day he quits the drugs so his symptoms won’t be as severe. Almost shed a tear watching this😔😢Lord give us strength 🙏🤲 You are in gods hands Chris 🙌🫶
If you look up actual research, weed seems to "kindle" schizophrenia, sometimes. Having a traumatic brain injury also raises risk for schizophrenia, as well as other mental health issues.
@matty5471 @grmpEqweer you are both correct: THC is the compound in weed that can trigger schizophrenia. THC is also the compound that gets you high; because of that, people try to get weed with higher contents of THC. CBD is the compound in weed that "seems to 'kindle' schizophrenia". CBD is an antipsychotic and is renowned for its affects of decreasing anxiety, depression, insomnia, schizophrenia, etc. CBD does not get you high, which is why people who smoke weed have been wanting less content of CBD in weed and higher amounts of THC.
Weed brings out any mental illness someone may have dormant in their brain/genetics. More people should talk about this. Not only can it activate schizophrenia, it can also activate someone’s bipolar, Tourette’s syndrome, psychosis, basically so many serious mental diseases and disorders. I can’t think of every name off the top of my head but you get the point
@matty5471 I’m 29 and schizoaffective. The drugs do fuck it up and definitely brought out the dormant genes in me. I’m trying to cope and live a normal life with such an abnormal condition. Hoping we both make it through
@@boopy12g yo bro im schizoaffective too and theres no doubt that this shit really fuckin sucks lol. We both know what its like to struggle everyday living with such a shitty condition but despite our struggle we have to always remember that we are in gods hands and that better days lie ahead. Stay strong bro manifesting nothing but greatness and good fortune for you🙏🙌
My heart goes out to Chris. I was married to someone that had this mental illness. Sadly he took his life at the age of 27. I am 62 now, and hearing Chris reminds me of what my husband went through. Mental illness should be talked about without feeling judged. My husband was labeled crazy never judge someone you don't know their journey. Chris, I see you.
That's so much to carry through life. If you're willing to share, I'd love to know how you saw it progress in your husband and if you were able to get him any type of help. Must have been so terrifying and scary to watch someone you love lose touch with reality. Sending love and light to you.
@@47nodoubt I'm 47 and still say mental illness but am on my awakening journey so have only recently realized this a gift not mental illness. If the older generation aren't awake, they only know it as a mental illness. My dad was schizophrenic and only have realized over the last 4 years of my awakening he wasn't bat shit crazy.
@@47nodoubtif he wasn’t on crystal meth I would believe it his hallucinations are because he is high af on drugs that really alter reality and who wants that when nobody sees what you see lol it’s like this guy that literally got high in jail and was knocked out on the bed looking like he is dying because his eyes are open tbh dude looked dead but I bet in his mind he was living his best life .
I am a little bit shaking about this... But I was able to get like a 65% of the data Chris said he hallucinated. And A) I was about to get this "ilness" too or B)I'm not even close of being mental il and however I could get some patterns also. All things about binary code about affirmative, negative. A woman's screamimg heared in the water and even once a weird dance, that was not a dance in fact was like making a key with the body. Like you could get ahead only trespassing like an exact way for that moment of the existence. It felt like a supreme control of the body, cause the normal walking just stopped and my mind found a certain way of pass by that place. That was the only ever time that happened. One day sick of being "slave of myself" I did track the moment when everything started to happen. Some kind of fusion between sinesthesya and numerology and exagrams studies just collided, and my young mind used that to face the hard family social time. The other thing I found is that Mind projects intuition on the outside when you can't connect with it internal way. Now the curious thing about this is how many congruents things or patterns could work the same way all around the World. May be is for the constantly bomb up of politics news around the world and the side effects of constantly use of technology. I don't know... But it's super curious the similitudes or similarities
I worked with homeless people, and it’s so sad how so many people like Chris get lost in life because it’s so hard to function in society while schizophrenic. I hope he finds peace.
@@TheIntJuggler There are local agencies which will come out to you if someone is having a mental health crisis. The person just has to agree to seek help. Most often, if the schizophrenia can be treated, and there is no drug use, a person can live a pretty stable life. There's also behavioral health centers which can help. Usually the individual knows what they're experiencing isn't right, and just ask them if they want help, and assure them the help is available. I would reach out to any services beforehand. Just remember, the individual totally believes what they're perceiving, and you can't get angry with them, try and guide the thinking to a more positive place. I wish you the best of luck. God be with you.
The purpose of an invisible torment would be to torment someone anonymously so they might never be held accountable. So the 'unseen hand' is referred to as 'THEY'. Those who we might suspect.We might never know. If they left a calling card we could pay them a visit an put our torments to rest in person now couldn't we?
I’ve never seen any interview like this before. I’ve never seen a coherent schizophrenic articulate what they’re going through so clearly and articulate their thoughts and why they did certain things yet know it’s psychosis at the same time. He has astounding self awareness and communicates his experiences so clearly. Such an amazing and meaningful insight to what this population goes through. He seems like a wonderful bright, intelligent, kind and genuine young man. Sending you light Chris.
Imagine yourself with a hangover, taking LSD, and hearing every noise and every thought and every interrelationship at the same intensity all at once…. Then trying to focus on a single thread…. Exhausting. This also happens with some forms of mania and autism/ADD…..
Nah men there are lots of coherent schizophrenics that even have youtube channels you should check them out. The bad thing about Chris is that he uses hard drugs and that doesn't help. But that is impressive on it's own because he adds fuel to his schizophrenia and still he makes a lot of sense and he's so aware of himself.
If you have a combination of medications that work well, it helps make this possible. I'm speaking from having schizophrenia myself and knowing many people with it throughout the years.
I know it’s been repeated - but please have him back. In such a short time, he allowed us into the depths of his hellish affliction in such a concise way. He was amazing. “I keep getting approached by dudes, I think it’s the hair.” And he is funny as hell.
Please bring him back for additional interviews. And please let him know how much love there is for him, as well as respect, and an open-mind to everything he has to say.
I'm 34 and had one random-ass schizophrenic episode a year or so back. Never had one before and haven't had one since. Lasted about a week. No drugs, but quite a bit of stress due to work, moving, and family stuff. Never knew I was prone to experiencing it. Showers have always been my decompression therapy. I talk to myself in the shower and tend to be very philosophical and existential. One day, I was in the shower doing the same routine, and it hit me. Like a punch in the face. An "attack". I felt this overwhelming sense of horror and dread. I didn't know what to do or think at the time, so jumped out of the shower, tracking water everywhere. I lived alone at the time, and just ran around naked for a while, sat down wet as shit on the couch. My first instinct was to call someone. But I worked the evening shift, so when I got home it was late at night, and I didn't want to call and bother anyone. So I just tried to make sense of it on my own and figure out what the fuck just happened. It wasn't a panic attack. I'd had those before and was very familiar with them. It was something else. There was still ringing in my ears, as if I'd just been through a war zone. If I thought about it too much or tried to recall what led up to the "attack", that same dread feeling would come over me. It terrified me. My brain was on fire trying to figure it out. I thought maybe a demon attacked me, or there was a chemical leak somewhere, or we were under attack and the chemical war was on. But I eventually settled on the conclusion that the universe had simply showed me something humankind wasn't meant to see. Maybe I saw it in the past or future, but I just had a glimpse of it right then and there. Just a small taste. And it was too overwhelming to bare. So my memory was wiped - by aliens. Yes, aliens. (This was just before all the alien stuff came out.) I felt ashamed and psychotic and so didn't tell anyone out of fear of judgement. Because I knew how crazy and stupid it sounded from a rational perspective. I never had visual or auditory hallucinations, but the delusion was very strong and very real. I tried to ignore it and move on, but it was hard. All week I slept with the lights on, and had my cats shut in the bathroom with me when I took showers, and played video games constantly to keep myself disengaged from reality. I felt like I was constantly being watched and became incredibly paranoid. I didn't even feel safe with my gun. I felt like I could be "attacked" by some supernatural entity again at any moment, or permanently placed in this version of hell I apparently saw and couldn't remember. It was exhausting. After about a week of nothing else happening and trying my best to ignore it, I finally gained some courage and looked stuff up online. I was led to schizophrenia. And it all clicked. I have a history of anxiety, depression, and OCD - I remember having to fight those nasty tics and behaviors as a teen. I was prone to symptoms of schizophrenia, and a schizophrenic episode was triggered by stress. I finally spoke to my mom about it and felt a lot better. I felt sane again. And life went on as normal. I took a small dip in the life of a paranoid schizophrenic and holy fuck, I can't imagine living your entire life there. It's beyond horrifying.
i had my first and only panic attack 3 months ago. i was, too, having deep existential thoughts as usual. you described it perfectly: " If I thought about it too much or tried to recall what led up to the "attack", that same dread feeling would come over me". i know in your case it wasnt a panic attack, but i felt exactly as if, if i tried to trace back the thought i had the exact second it struck me, this overwhelming immensity would come to me again, as if the whole universe was cornering my mind. i was at a hotel by the beach back then, and the sounds of the breaking waves of the sea didnt help at all. i still wonder what would have happened if i had actually followed this thought, and not stopped myself as soon as i recognised it as a panic attack. it literally felt as if i had thought of a WRONG thought, a prohibited thought that i wasnt supposed to think of as a human.
the big factor when you are in stress. You don't have enough sleep the brain function is affected so if you know how to handle your stress and there is hope to deminish the symptoms. Ptsd episode there is similarity symptoms of schizophrenic you are constantly fearful and flash back. Did you consult a professional help and you need a proper diagnose.?Sometimes this constant fear comes from spiritual warfare and there is demonic attack, anyway I'm just giving an example.Anyway, some Dr. or phsycologist they don't believe that there is a demonic attack instead there is a chemical imbalance in the brain. If you are Christian read Psalm 23 and 35 before you settle down.
I hope you got down on your knees and prayed. EVERYTIME you feel like something spiritual is happening it probably is and I’ve found that praying really helps especially for us who struggle mentally. Sending hugs xx
My best friend growing up was the most straight edge, clear thinking person I knew. He smoked weed for the first time at 18 and immediately had psychosis and was diagnosed with schizophrenia, spent 2 years in the mental hospital. He has never been the same. He’s 34
I was driving yesterday in my hometown and saw a QR code on a telephone pole advertising for giving medical marijuana and this is in Kentucky. The enemy wants to the whole world to see getting high as a a great time without consequences.
Same with this guy I was talking to… he came from horrific abuse, started smoking weed and still does, schizophrenia diagnosis. I’m convinced it was brought on by the weed.
Substance use can bring an already underlying or dormant condition like psychosis or schizophrenia to the surface. As a trigger indeed, that's all it does or can do. Weed or LSD for example is never the direct cause of such an illness. Just thought I'd share
@@misterik11 a little research confirms your statement, but some need to demonize it out of fear and lack of understanding or wanting to learn and understand.
Chris seems to be an Intelligent, interesting and sweet spirited person with a great smile. Mental illness is such a misunderstood situation and not at all enough funding. One thing that stood out is when he said a man yelling at you on the street might be protecting you, in his eyes. I pray he can get some housing/safety/security and maybe on better meds. Chris, you are in my prayers.
It’s not mental illness it’s drug addiction (not the same thing) this dudes been lying for so long that he believes everything he says. I know a lot of dudes like this who claim certain ailments but are just drug addicts and liars. Drug addiction is the problem.
My son is diagnosed with schizophrenia. He has been so courageous. People have no idea what he has endured. It takes great strength. My heart goes out to those who experience this brain disease and those who could no longer endure and to those loved ones who lost people.
i have it i think people with it are very misunderstood and everyone around them want to conform em to their reality instead of trying to understand theres
I know. My son was diagnosed at age 24 and he is 29 now. He's never been homeless, but only because his girlfriend called me from Seattle and told me "something was off." It was the day after Thanksgiving. Been a wild ride since then. We found a fantastic doctor out of state who helped get him on clozapine and he has been stable for two years. When he is psychotic, he sounds just like Chris.
Thank you Mark for this interview and educating on schizophrenia. My son started hearing voices around 18, after many years of medications, therapy, ect treatment, ketamine, a few hospital stays, alternative therapies , he only got worse. He was constantly paranoid & depressed He believed people in his apartment building were conspiring to kill him. He couldn’t hold a job due to hearing evil voices. I would ask him what they’re saying, he said he couldn’t tell me. He would on occasion use drugs, I imagine to try to get a break. He stopped taking his meds, said he was tired of fighting the demons. I called a crisis unit to his apartment on May 2, 2018 to do an evaluation. He had bought a pistol. I physically fought him for it for almost two hours trying to get the pistol from him, I begged, prayed , and cried while he had tears in his eyes & said he believed they were coming to get him to rape him. When the sheriff knocked on the door, he shot himself in the heart. As a mom, you want to fix this, save your child. He was 30. I’m heartbroken everyday & mad that life had been so unfair to him. Again, thanks Mark!
I’m so sorry to hear that. As someone with schizophrenia it’s definitely not easy living with at all, God bless you lady. Sorry about your son I hope he is at peace now. Just know that it’s not your fault.
I am so sorry for you and your son. What a horrible thing to have to witness. My heart breaks for you and I know there is nothing I can say to help. Perhaps the only comfort is that your son is no longer struggling in the hell of this world. Sending so much love and strength to you ❤️🩹❤️🩹
my boyfriend had schizophrenia but he refused treatment idk why and we lost him last year, from suicide, he was the only person who truly ever showed me kindness and real love. such a pure and beautiful soul taken so soon. i hope he knew how much we all loved him.
yes, that happened to my father. Smoking weed basically unmasked his schizophrenia. He took his own life on October 18 2013, 5 days after my 8th birthday while having an episode.
How astonishing he is able to function with in the dual reality of his mind. He is navigating between worlds and I find him so fascinating. I hope he will be ok and find peace.
@@Angela-hv9jv As an ex lsd user i have to say a lot. Dont get fooled by this guy , there is a chance that he thinks he is on schizo trip on this interview and that Mark isnt real.
Wow. Amazing interview. We have my schizophrenic brother-in-law living with us the last five years, who spent 35 years exactly this way on the streets of Sacramento. Now he's medicated, but when he first got to us in 2019 he was out of his head in exactly the same kinds of ways I hear in Chris's tale. A very sudden education in the realities of mental illness for our four teenage children at home at that time. We live in NY, and were informed one day (by a friend who'd looked out for him in CA all those years) that he was done with California and wanted to come "home" now. We had three days to get ourselves together before he was on our doorstep. It's not always easy, but this interview reminds me that his reality is different from ours, but just as real to him. I pray for patience 🙏
As a mental health professional who specializes in severe mental illnesses such as schizophrenia, I can't emphasize how much the phrase "it's just weed" hits me. So many of my patients smoked marijuana just ONCE (and NOT laced) and it flipped the switch for psychosis. If you are genetically predisposed to mental illness, especially schizophrenia and bipolar, just once doing a drug is all it can take. This hurts my heart! Also, his level of insight, his symptoms, and describing his mothers psychosis reminds me more of schizoaffective disorder made worse by street drug use.
I smoked when I was 19 and had a horrible horrible trip from marijuana! Two years later I had a mental break down Major Depressive Disorder and panic disorder. I’ve never been the same since and I’m now 45. You’re so correct on the “it’s just weed.” I can’t stress enough how this drug can affect someone’s life like it did mine.
Im 25, smoked weed for 3 years, then one day randomly fell under psychosis for 2 weeks, i was out of my mind. Ive never felt the same since. I was never warned. As a mother now myself i will make sure my child knows the dangers. It is not just weed.
So handsome and so intelligent. Reminds me of my dad who also has schizophrenia. Totally warm and approachable but he truly believes people are spying on him through the phone and that people are out to kill him. I really hope they find a cure for schizophrenia, I’ve witnessed my dad so terrified at times, it’s really unfair that some people have to live like this.
Well, people are actually spying on all of us through our phones but that's a whole different conversation. They're called the NSA, CIA, Mossad, and a variety of other international intelligence agencies funded to create a quiet and comfortable police state. It's an updated and more civilized approach to what the Bolsheviks, Nazis and Maoists envisioned for society. Cheers
“Don’t get jaded. Don’t take things as blasé just because you live experienced them before, you can probably find new aspects to them if you look hard enough” That’s a perfectly coherent piece of advice.
I hadn't seen Chris story until I saw the " updated " version. 😮 OMG it broke my heart to see him once sooooooo physically healthy and seemingly OK. He is literally living in his own personal hell😢
I've never heard shizophrenia been so well described before. The terror and agony, man...what a brutal mental illness. Somehow I think it must be even more rough when he can step aside and see it from a pure logic perspective. Almost like hes looking in from the outside. Fuck man, life is not fair. I really, really hope that you find your way one day dude. Much love.
Whats funny about what you said is it makes me think about the movie alice through the looking glass. My mom had schizophrenia and it was some serious stuff but i can only imagine what it would be like if it was at least in a positive manor for their episodes because my mom had nothing but horrible episodes and she saw some dark stuff.
well, everything he said i see too, if you sungaze you see black grey orbs so thats not a hallucination i've asked everyone and they all see the same thing. as for the voices I'm unsure of, no way anyone can say he doesn't no reason to make that up. It's easy for the commoner to cast him away as "crazy" so they can't consider the things he is saying are what he experiences. the meth and other shit is just degenerate.
He seems so normal till he touches on certain subjects. My daughter is going through the same thing and she too believes talking about it will mess up her connection to some being so no one believes she is sick. Her sister and i are the only ones close enough to her to tell and she cut us off because we want her ti get help. We are going through a real hard time...Im so glad I saw this man's story. She is 27 and it just started with her. "Perfectly sensible but saying rediculous things" Thank you soooo much for this
My daughter has paranoid schizophrenia. People have no idea of the struggle. She refuses to medicate and the disease continues to ravage our family. It's very hard to have hope, when you learn more about the diagnosis
Yo, I watched a documentary about art from people with mental illnesses and they found that the art by people with schizophrenia from around the world had incredible similarities. The reoccurring theme was that ‘being’ and they all drew, like, lines and rays and waves things like that, some type of connection, that goes from the ‘being’ to their heads. I can’t remember the name of the documentary. Sry your daughter is dealing with that. I you, her, and your family, the best.
Same my sister just turned 27 it's hard growing up with someone and seeing them change so dramatically right before your eyes and no matter how much you wanna help they have to want to receive help
My son had a friend with schizophrenia, she was such a lovely, darling girl. She committed suicide when in her 20"s. It's a horrific illness, my heart goes out to sufferers,, dealing with this every day must be exhausting
I've known several people with Schizophrenia of varying degrees that can't go near weed. It has a super negative impact on their brain chemistry. I'm sure harder drugs do, too. I have family that have schizophrenia and I'm glad you did this interview. It's a really hard thing to go through from the outside but imagine if it was you experiencing things like this. Your interviews, I think, help humanize the whole situation. Thank you, Mark.
Exactly the opposite with me, I know schizophrenic people who need the herb to control their emotions! Chris obviously had some laced weed, sad situation!! I feel so sorry for him!
@@twinpyramid5985 Nothing to do with "laced" weed.. it's just weed .. I've been close to three people with skitz.. they all want to smoke weed and will say it helps them but it doesn't at all ..
There is no one answer for if weed is harmful or helpful to their psychosis. Because our high from person to person is different. Our physiology is different so of course our High would be different.
He is a beautiful man, with a good heart; you can tell. So sad that he is suffering by this disease. I wish him all the best and I hope that he get´s a chance to a safer life! He deserves peace in his thoughts, and the drugs should not have a place in his body.
Such a smart chap, cannot believe he's homeless. Same my auntie, my mum's sis, he's judge with schizofrenia also such a nice person, carrying, honest, modest just like Chris. Thank you for this upload.
Yanno what? If someone is approaching me out in the city, and they give me those predatory vibes? Sometimes I will start arguing with the sky. This tends to make them back off.
This was such a heartbreaking and eye-opening interview, I'm glad that Soft White Underbelly is shedding light on these important issues. OTR should also tackles these topics in Manila!
@@stopthephilosophicalzombie9017 Because everyone knows that the worst risk of meth is tooth decay... You can get dental implants, but you can't replace your brain.
This is why Housing First programs are so so important. Chris’s symptoms weren’t as severe when his basic needs were met but because he uses substances, he lost his housing. We need to have more programs like Housing First where regardless of someone’s substance use or severe mental illness, they will have access to permanent housing. His condition would likely improve significantly and he would be able to pursue other goals in life. Thanks for sharing Chris’s story :)
This is the absolute most facinating person. Out of psychosis, he is basically normal and is caught between two worlds. He has me now looking up schizophrenics not on psychosis. I am used to the addicts vids, but this one was the absolute most fascinating!!!
Despite being absolutely terrifying, I find schizophrenia to be fascinating. The first person I ever ran across afflicted with it was as in jail, and the gibberish he was saying drew me in completely. To me, it’s always sounded like the worst heavy acid trip you could ever take, except it lasts forever. That’s scary as hell.
Yeah, I've experienced similar things through psychedelics, but that was after over 20 hits, a gram of mushrooms, and honey infused with about a gram of butane hash. But I was only at that level for a few hours before I passed the peak and could work my way through it objectively, and I was completely lucid the next day, although it wasn't until the day after that that I was fully sober, Having that degree of hallucination as just an everyday aspect of your life just sounds extremely debilitating. My experience was intense, but overall I processed it and found a way to be more comfortable with my existence. With schizophrenia, you don't get that clarity and ability to sit back and work through it with a sober mind. It sounds terrifying, and I truly hope that he can find a way to stabilize and get the help he needs
I agree, it is SO fascinating. I always think there is some truth behind some of their delusions. Like his mind telling him to stay away from technology because it will harm his "magic" inside... It could be that he is so sensitive to external stimuli that he can feel the radiation/waves from the phones. I know that is an actual thing to certain people that are very sensitive.
Its also frightening because its not always active/obvious with everyone. I used to work with a friend who had it and he was fine the entire day, but when we took our break together he suddenly got a look in his eyes and started saying I look like an alien, asking if I can read his mind, all that kind of stuff. He was the smartest guy I knew and he probably still is, but hes certainly troubled. He doesnt take his meds because he doesnt believe theres anything wrong with im, even after being diagnosed.
I watched this video because my brother was a paranoid schizophrenic and took his own life in an extremely violent way. He hid his condition from me and I am always interested to learn more. Chris's interview helps me understand how all-consuming the illness truly is, and how hard it is to function in society when you have it. Also, this was one of my favorite interviews. I laughed a lot and found his inner-world so fascinating and brilliant. Thank you for sharing. 💛
yes, that happened to my father. smoking weed basically unmasked his schizophrenia. He took his own life on October 18 2013, 5 days after my 8th birthday while having an episode.
One of the most fascinating interviews I have ever seen. Such a handsome and articulate man. Heart wrenching. Thank you for giving this lovely man a voice. So much could be learned by mental health professionals with this interview. No wonder he experiments with drugs!
Chris is one of my new faves. He seems very aware of what he’s dealing with but what can he honestly do about it. I really like that he was so candid and I truly wish the best for him
Me to !! Usually within 10 seconds I can tell if I like or don’t very easily and some of these people are hard to like. This guy isn’t hard to like at all !! He’s actually kinda funny and his attitude towards the disease he got saddled with his phenomenal!!!!!
@John Scott I assume they meant that it's there favorite Guest interview they've seen. Was a strange way to frame it but I understood it when I read it. Welcome to 2023 most people talk like this. I've done it too. I'm sure you have. Also I wouldn't consider it a tragedy, thats argueable just as much of a strange frame of perspective. We dont even know what conciousness is or what exactly is happening in a schizophrenic persons brain. They could be tapping into something that most people don't have the ability to tap into. As a person whos abnormally creative and has PTSD and had crippling OCD I think relate heavily to a lot of schizophrenic people, but I'm not schizophrenic.
Some of the stuff he's saying is legit though. That one eye stuff is everywhere symbolically. Goodwill symbol is one eye, LG and taco bell and CBS logo is an eye etc..But then other stuff he says is like ehhh that's kinda out there. Seems like a pretty cool dude actually
I used to work in psych. Many of them are that in tune with their psychosis. One in particular knew when she was getting sick because John Lennon would “come and talk to her”. She’d literally say on admission “John came back so, I’m here”. She was cute as a button…one of my favorite patients, actually.
I work in mental health as well and I even notice their pupil change when they start hearing voices there’s another lady ears get blood shot red it’s sad
You know how humans only use a percentage of their brain? I genuinely think that the mental health community actually knows 3% of the spiritual dimension of psychosis and schizophrenia. That is why it’s so freaking heartbreaking. I know there will be a breakthrough but it could take a hundred years. Thank you for trying and showing compassion.
The important thing to understand, he doesn't "think" this stuff, he "knows". I have schizophrenia and when I had bad symptoms, I "knew" what was going on, I didn't "think" it was happening.
Man, a follow up with Chris if he could be 100% sober would be fascinating. So hard to know how much of what he was saying was because of the recent drug use vs his schizophrenia. Either way, such a sad situation but his upbeat attitude really just makes you feel for him.
yeah i think it was a bit too much to interview him like that, too. i see theses guys as so unpredictable on a deeper level than anyway he might never come back at mark's.
Thought the same thing . Acid and meth alone cause people to go into psychosis this dude just needs to get control of his drug use and he'd be so much better off
Exactly, first time he experienced it was just smoking weed, only time it went away was when he was in jail. Good chance first episode he got some weed laced with something else
My dear son is 34, shares many of the traits and experiences as this young man. He also uses many drugs and has spent time in jail. Currently he is trying to get clear enough to plead his case. He is in a state mental hospital. The system really has no good plan or way to help these people. They are in a cycle, a trap. My son was a Medic in the US Army and is a brilliant human even in his psychosis. He is sad, depressed and suicidal. I’m so sorry to all these people. It hurts to see this.
God Bless you and your son. I was never diagnosed with schizophrenia but had psychosis. Believing if I slept, the demons would get me. It led to somniphobia, and bc I never slept (maybe 2 hrs a day), my body started to shut down. I'm better now, and while I can never understand what you are going through, I do understand the fear and helplessness of mental illness. Prayers that you and your son find peace. ❤
Dear Heavenly Father, we just ask that you bring peace, comfort and protection over this man and that you place a hedge of protection around him while you guide him to a place of safety, healing and love. In Jesus Sweet Name Amen
I lost one of my best friends this week to schizophrenia. He hung on for 20 years, but couldn't take it any longer. It is such a nasty disorder. Mark, thank you for shedding light on this topic.
Please have him back on!!! Please Mark. This one had me liked hooked, hooked. I watch them everyday. It's how I start my morning drive lol. Been watching for like 4-5 yrs
What a handsome guy. I hope he stays safe out on the street. He seems to love experimenting with street drugs. Very sad. It has to be heartbreaking for his family.
Such a beautiful man! Was his striking picture that actually made me stop scrolling vids to watch. You can see the depth in his eyes. So articulate and seems like a kind soul.
my brother was just like this. once brilliant and highly intelligent. He's gone now. street drugs took him out, and it was tough on everyone. This man brought back so many memories. RIP Truth.
That was one hell of a story and glimpse into the mind of a schizophrenic.. he seems like a good dude too, that’s tragic he’s been saddled with this disease.
Sadly, that s good choice of words. They are indeed saddled with these mental diseases and very hard to break free. Not their fault whatsoever but yet they are looked down on as beneath us or society that it’s became currently. I wish there was something I could do to help this man!
He has drug induced Psychosis .. Hes being doing hard drugs for quite some time . Like he said he deserved a 'hit' This should of been titled drug induced Psychosis .
Schizophrenia has always intrigued me. I have an uncle who has schizophrenia. I’ve seen him do some impressive, very odd and sometimes explosive things. My uncle is one of the reasons I chose to go in the mental health field.
My son's schizophrenia got triggered by him experimenting with recreational weed while hanging out with friends. It's been an incredibly difficult journey for our family. He is 22. It began at 19/20. He refuses to stay on his medication. I am a single mother, and the constant stress I feel daily, dealing with his behavior has been deteriorating my health. God help all these men and women who struggle with this condition, and those who love them.
You are not alone. My son's started at 17, we are 6 years in now. Will not stay on medication. We have to be constantly on guard. He ends up in jail at least once a year if he's been off medication too long...there's very little help out there.
I've had schizophrenia for the past 12 years. Medicine makes it worse for me. Meditating and remaining calm in stressful situation helps a lot. Only your son knows how to control it. Let him. I got my masters degree and am working as a software engineer all while with schizophrenia.
And I feel like I also must jump in. I have twins that are 21. My son has mild autism and had reactions to his vaccines. My daughter has anxiety and depression and has been using marijuana since college. Their father has schizoaffective bipolar, and there is a long history of schizophrenia/delusional, behavior, and alcoholism from his brother (my kids uncle), father ( my kids grandfather) and on back several generations. Just the thought of my daughter using marijuana recreationally makes me incredibly worried for her. My son is against all sorts of drugs and alcohol, which is great because he is predisposed to having issues with things. But yes, I am a hodgepodge of auto immune issues and related stress induced conditions. I feel you.
my mom had this condition unfortunately she passed in my mid childhood. i wish everyone with this good luck you guys can get going great i’m helping my friend with this. My prayers for you all. You guys are fighters
As others have previously stated, this interview is so educational. Thank you Chris for being so candid. The frustrating part is having better understanding and still not being able to do anything to help. Mark I really appreciate you helping all of understand a little better. These insights are incredible.
_Thumbs up._ Candid, frustrating, unable to help. Imagine being ill, thinking ten people are assaulting a child in a house, setting the trash can on fire, - the New Year party-goers come out and extinguish the fire by peeing on it. This guy gets prison and banned from a city. I do not know which is more atrocious, the ‘legal’/ courts system or the medical/ mental health infrastructure. Cosby spent around the same time locked up as Chris, and _America’s Dad_ was not attempting to save no girl.
Seriously, this is gold, I know exactly what he's on about as I've experienced very similar things during my deepest psychotic breaks due to schizophrenia. There's a primal bit in us all trying to make sense of the chaotic modern world. I felt 'walking the road' too. We face death there, going out in the pitch black to find out. Being both God and the devil and the persecution we experience as schizophrenics is simply Hellish. We find ourselves in a very real purgatory. He'll know of the time dilation and the sheer impossibility of ever making true sense or structure out of these worlds, the frustration. Thank you so much for these stories of hope, I very much wish this guy gets into recovery and can begin to heal with medicinal help.
Very good post Ree™. My father, my brother and I are schizophrenic with other co-morbid mental illnesses and we've also experienced similar things. When we've been in psychosis at different periods, there's quite a few tropes / themes /thought patterns/hallucinations that overlap...even though we are 3 individuals. Some of our experiences sound strikingly close to what Chris has described... especially the Magical Thinking. Mental illness was rife on my Father's side with my Great-Grandparents, Grandparents, and his siblings exhibiting their own individual manifestations on a spectrum, not all schizophrenics though. In the past I preferred self medication (never stimulants though, always downers which I can't post about here) to anti-psychotics. I'm middle aged and still struggling with it, sometimes daily or sometimes when it comes in waves. I find any form of creativity and the Arts to be extremely helpful. I wonder how many programs integrate something like that. Anyways thanks for your post, I felt compelled to just type my experience out after watching Chris and reading some of the positive comments. Take Care.
@@SamaelAzazel131 Yo! Thank you so much for your reply, it is much appreciated. I felt like commenting because the thing that we have is very rare and also often misunderstood. I was very lucky to find a path of medicinal help to alleviate the delusions I was experiencing. Really interesting to hear your symptoms and you say it ran in your family? For mine it was out of the blue. It is heartening to see the support in the comments for Chris. Clearly there's a beautiful guy underneath all the meth and marijuana use. The rocking caused by meth is so surprising to me as where I live meth isn't a thing. Where would he be without it? Thanks again for your inspirational words.
You do such great work showing the world real stuff. AND explaining it. My heart breaks for him. He’s literally stuck between worlds. People with mental illness self medicate, at times. This is a very smart, kind individual , trying to do their best.
As a homeless survivor, and not actually referring myself here, I can tell you that you would be surprised to see the amount of people who are homeless and extremely intelligent.
The bit about his soulmate being on the wind, and having to die over and over to eventually get back together is both insane and so incredibly romantic at the same time.
Used to see Chris on the streets in Panama City, FL, so it was crazy seeing him on RUclips! Never saw him panhandle or bother anyone. Asked if we was hungry a few times and got him a pub sub (sub from Publix). He was delighted and thankful. Seemed like a good guy who’s just down on his luck.
The ethereal is real. He is just caught in between. Not at all a sick man he is just ahead of it. The frequency isn't in his mind, anymore than the bands in the radio. But he hears and sees questionable things to us because we are woven in the vain. He is like toto, seeing the wizard for what it is, while others still tremble to the smoke and mirrors. Human or effigy. Spirit or flesh. Or both. He's just not able to find the language to truly make sense to others. Just an observation allegedly lol
Poor guy I feel so much compassion for him, a girl in my hometown had Schizophrenia and everyone tried her bad I was the only one who talked to her with dignity, thanks to show this interview I hope more people feels compassion for this problem. He is a good man I wish him peace.
Seeming perfectly sensible while saying completely ridiculous things IS SCHIZOPHRENIA! This is a fascinating video that really shows what it's like to have this horrid illness. My son was diagnosed when he was 25, ten years ago. He doesn't communicate as well as Chris, has always been quiet but .... When he does reveal something about what's going on, he sounds very much like Chris, sounding reasonable while saying unreasonable things, like everything is opposite.
My son is almost symptom free now having battled this since 2016. There were 3 real life people talking to him every day. only one of which he knows personally. The other two are foreigners unlikely to speak his native language - but they speak it perfectly anyway. We were able to laugh at how absurd that is but still the voices kept speaking. He is now somehow able to fend off the voices 'because he knows they lie all the time'. He cannot explain how he's got so much better in any other way. He doesn't do drugs and never has. I believe sleep deprivation is what started it. He's told me about cars talking to him In the street daily for the last 6 years but these have mostly gone now. He knows that cars talking like humans makes no sense but the symptoms are above logic. I don't think this illness can be cured with logic. However during his illness he did his best to keep busy studying and refused to give up despite the voices demanding most of his attention. Although progress was extremely slow he passed the courses one by one. I believe this was key to his recovery.
Thank you for sharing Chris' story. He seems like such a nice guy and I'm sorry he's struggling. I pray there's a cure for this debilitating disease soon 😢
I’m schizophrenic and medicated. In remission of any symptoms for years now. Live a normal life & a new mom. I have hope for him 🙏🏽. It’s not easy you feel like a guinea pig with Trial and error with getting the right cocktail of medication. But consistency is key. Stay on them even if you think your cured. God bless man 💕
Why would you bring a child into this world, risking the possibility of them also having a mental disorder? My mother has serious mental problems, and passed them on to all her children. I've attempted suicide twice and will not fail again. I think it's very selfish. No logic in it at all.
Hi , I just wanted to ask , is there anyways you can help someone with schizophrenia when they are hearing voices , my bf has schizophrenia and I just wanted to know if there’s anything I can do . His schizophrenia mainly involves hearing voices and he is able to do normal day to day activities and stuff, but sometimes he hears things and I just want to know if there’s anything you think helps . Thank you
Hey Chris, very brave to do this interview.. I know it was hard to do when your brain is in conflict ion. Know that meth contains many poisonous chemicals. As a CADC ( certified drug & alcohol counselor) for 20 years, and former user myself, I know meth can cause permanent psychosis. I’ve seen many meth addicts that are now in permanent psychosis due to meth induced chemical/brain .damage. I have some mild psychosis that I have to deal with on my own. Flashbacks . Living on the street leads to nowhere. Life is so short Chris. There are so many possibilities for you and you’re still so young. Sending you positive vibes. All you have to do is ask for help. ♥️💐♥️
He seems like such a kind and genuine person who is just struggling and I feel sorry for him that his struggles progressed to the point that he ended up going to jail.
Man, my heart goes out to this guy. He seems so genuine and kind. Aware as he battles every minute, I cannot imagine. The strength he must have. Also, his theories and what he sees/hears would make an extremely interesting book or film.
Ive known several people who have presumably drug induced schizophrenia and mostly weed being involved. I don’t have schizophrenia but I had to quit smoking weed because I was becoming insanely paranoid and it was actually frightening. I don’t trust my mind on psychedelics. I’d argue schizophrenia is probably the worst mental illness to live with
When he said that he had a woman in another dimension that was his soul mate and they had to keep on dying so they could be together again. I almost cried. That hit me hard for some reason. This is one of my top interviews from Mark. I hope Chris is ok.
A lot of what he says sounds like the plot of the anime/manga The Seven Deadly Sins. It involves a couple, one angel and one demon. They are cursed as punishment for their betrayl and he lives forever/is a god and she is mortal and dies in front of him repeatedly. Every time she dies she is reborn and he continually seeks her out for centuries every time and the cycle repeats. Not sure if Chris was inspired by this but either way its definitely interesting.
Schizophrenia is such a painful disease, for the person and their loved ones. My ex husband developed schizophrenia three months after we got married. We were together for 5 years, I had no idea how he became unwell. I only found out once he was severely unwell that he was smoking pot and heaps of it. The day he became unwell was the worst day of my life… months in hospital, months of him hallucinating I’m the devil and finally trying to hurt me… I saw my best friend, love and husband turn into a sick monster. He became absolutely obsessed with religion and constantly was fighting strangers and trying to hurt me. His disease took 11 years of my life and his entire life. I’ll never ever ever understand it and I truely wish family members and sufferers peace. What a difficult disease to suffer. Thank you for your interview ❤
i have schizophrenia and watching this was very helpful for me. i listen to the delusions of others and they sound so stupid. it makes me feel like mine are just as crazy and dumb! it makes it easier to ignore them
I feel like the questions could have been much better, and the interview seemed condescending. Chris is bright, honest, and more self aware than most sane people. A bit disappointed with this one.
"this woman ive been talking to . shes my soulmate but she lives in a different world, so we have to keep dying and coming back to life just so we can be together " that hit me hard
Yes, and as soon as I heard the car horn it was like someone said something to him that only he could hear. I hope only the best for him...seems like a genuinely good guy.
The way he describes certain drug use filling up a mental pool that eventually spills over is VERY interesting to me. I'm a healthy person but I when I was younger I was quite the psychonaut. I did a lot of psilocybin and lsd for many years coupled with a lot of meditation, kundalini yoga, chronic marijuana use, and even some Thelemic ceremonial magick. I got to a point where I was starting to break down and was experiencing awful psychosis when I wasn't using. And I remember that it felt a lot like Chris describes here in this video. I remember I had a discussion about it with a close friend: we both agreed that taking these drugs and doing these "spiritual" practices does what we described as "filling up your dinner plate". It's as if your psyche has a plate that holds information and can only contain so much. And you MUST eat what's on your plate. And the more drugs or experiences you have, the more you put on your plate. And if you overdo it, you can't keep up with it. It takes time to digest all this information you're exposing yourself to. It's been many years since I've taken any drugs or practiced any form of "magick" and I still feel as if I'm digesting (processing) those experiences. I like how he describes it as a pool spilling over which then triggers the psychosis. That's exactly what it feels like. The human mind is fascinating.
The magick side leads to madness, because that's where chaos resides. Reality is really chaotic and the more drugs you take, the more you see the spectrum of bizarre quantum events. We're not built to live there.
This is also called opening yourself up to demonic spirts, the Bible warms of such things. The Hebrew word for witchcraft is Pharmakeia, also ancient Greek φαρμακεία (pharmakeía, “the use of drugs”), from φάρμακον (phármakon, “a drug, charm, enchantment”). it also talks about sorcery and necromancy as "the use of power gained from the assistance or control of evil spirits especially for divining : necromancy."
Thats an interesting way to put it. Related to the psyches ability to process the wild change in your entire reality. I think i could eat a dump truck.
A friend of mine takes a medicine called Clozapine & he is literally 99% back to normal - no more voices. I hope this fellow finds his answer & all others with this affliction
I’ve known Chris Phillips for 6 years. We were great friends in Mississippi, and even though he has schizophrenia, that never changed the way he treated me. We always talked about music, ghosts, Magic the Gathering, and other things. One day he said he was moving to California, and just vanished for two years. You have no idea how great it was to just randomly hear from him on Facebook again. We talk all the time and pick up exactly where we left off. Miss ya, Chris. Come home soon so we can play Magic. Thank you so much for letting my buddy tell his story
Where at in MS? It made me happy when he mentioned he was here. There's really very very few people here worth talking to. When he made the comparison to the game Go - I knew he was interesting lol. But he needs to get off of the meth. I've known and lost so many people to it. Entirely too many.
@@Aromatic.Bleach Chris and I lived in Brandon, MS in Rankin County. Just 20 minutes east of Jackson. I spent the first 20 years of my life there, and he spent 8 years there when he moved from Pensacola. He meant the world to me. Seriously
Why would you put his full name out online, are you serious??
God bless you.
@@Kam-rp4rn 😂 agreed
I know Chris personally.
I was the boss he vacationed with to Vegas.
Chris lived with us for the last year before he fell into psychosis.
He asked if I'd take him to the store on Christmas Eve night 2019 in Vegas.
He got out of the car while talking on the phone with his brother & walked away into the night after a year of living and working together every day.
The last thing he said to me that night was that he wasn't going to go down as a pedophile, as if I had accused him of it, which I hadn't.
We literally went from talking about sodas and chips to alleged accusations of pedophilia, then he was gone.
He told me years later that he went behind the gas station, then took off running toward the strip.
That was the true beginning of Chris' psychosis.
We never knew he was struggling as we drove cross country on vacation.
He never told us what he was going through.
We also never saw him again.
Chris contacted us 2 years later in early 2023 when he was in "the program", but we haven't heard back from him for a few months since earlier this year.
Glad to see this, and that he's alive.
People may just see a crazy person, but we know Chris and how smart he is.
While he's definitely different now, it's still Chris and it's clear that he knows who he is.
What has happened to this man is a tragedy, given his potential.
Thank you for verifying our friend is ok.
It's the only clarity we have now.
Chris was definitely one of a kind. I was so glad when we all found out that he was alive and breathing. The second I found out I called you. I hope he can go on for another interview. Fancy meeting you here, John 👍
Heavy. You tried. Firme.
I love you Chris. I see you and Im with you.❤
You guys definitely did drugs there. That’s the most important part of this story, because drug use often ends up in schizophrenia
@@shila8379 Chris was into crystal & LSD before we met, but the year before he left, he had left behind all his old friends to work and live with us.
He even told us that living with us was like being in recovery.
You could say that when he lived with us he was at his best in quite awhile, in our happy home, and working with me every day.
I'm a medical technologies engineer and Chris helped us meet the 24 hour on-call demands of that business. We always had to be in full control of our faculties for work, so that's why I don't use drugs.
As far as Chris, he didn't use any drugs like that while he stayed with us, but I knew he smoked weed sometimes.
We've got kids and wouldn't have allowed hard drugs anywhere near us. Chris did what Chris wanted to do, and we couldn't stop him anymore than anyone else could, but yes, Chris was a recovering addict when he lived with us and has backslidden.
He said “just weed” but weed TOTALLY will trigger psychosis in those of us who are prone.
Yes, I thought the same. It is well known, that it can cause psychosis, in particular in younger age. He is older, but as you said, he is maybe prone to it. Good luck to this guy.
I noticed that. It's possible that the problem has been made worse in recent decades by the reduction of CBD content, which is anti-psychotic, through continual hybridising in pursuit of maximum THC yield - from what I gather it's now practically zero in most weed.
He said he "slammed crystal" shortly after. But when you have this disorder going on, it all can be half truths you're hearing right now
@@thomasma8924I don’t care for the framing of that, saying weed causes the psychosis can be misleading though i am familiar with the research and understand why you’d state it in that way. Any psychoactive compound can exaggerate the rate at which a condition reveals itself, the reason I don’t like to say a substance is the cause is because the condition is already there and the experience under that substance triggered an episode. I think it’s important to make these distinctions because we do not want people to be mislead or confused by the literature and be swayed away from potential medicine that could benefit them. Nobody is going to want to try something if they think it can give them a mental illness which is how that framing could be interpreted. It’s important that we are giving out the highest quality information that we can to others about substances because harm reduction is crucial to understand when making an informed decision about taking a substance or recommending one. I had a friend who I used to do a lot of LSD with and for years never had any issues, he had one really rough experience that seemed to effect him more than usual and it wasn’t in a positive way. Over the next few years he continued to take LSD and things only got worse to the point where I wouldn’t trip with him anymore because of how bad he would freak out during those experiences and it was truthfully hard to endure those psychologically. He’s been in and out of mental hospitals since then and I don’t imagine he’s seen any real change for the better, we are no longer friends so I don’t get any current updates. I will add that his mental illness had nothing to do with us not being friends, he got in trouble with the police and tried to set me up and that’s not something I can have around. My point being I had no idea he had an underlying mental illness until it was too late, nobody could have known unless he had went and had a diagnosis done but even then if he wasn’t showing any symptoms why would you think to be tested? We aren’t going to be able to protect everyone but what we can do is offer high quality information to give people the best opportunity at making an informed decision on something so serious
I have schizophrenia. When I did lsd I wouldn't come out of the trip like everyone else. It's like the door was open, but rather than looking, I walked through it. Now, the two worlds are one, as I don't know where the door was that I entered through.
I worked on the psych ward in Florida for 25 years. Chris, you’re one of my people and I feel like I know you. Take care of yourself, I wish you the best.
Did you ever hear anything that made you think that this may be supernatural and not merely psychological?
you sound schizo@@bboynewsboy991
@@bboynewsboy991 ikr
You gotta have stories up the wazoo!
@@bboynewsboy991there are things we just don’t know yet but we’re just living in a rotating traveling planet in space so a lot will be revealed eventually that we don’t yet know.
A client I worked with said the saddest thing to me. “Mental illness stole my whole life from me”. He has been talking about his successful lawyer brother with a wife and kids. He told me they were exactly alike growing up and could have become exactly the same. But his schizophrenia hit at 19 and that was it. He could never dream of a normal life. His hallucinations won’t let him. What a sad world we live in sometimes.
:(
Same. A drug was slipped to a person I know at a party and they were in college and going into the military. Ruined the rest of their life.
@@ARasputinaFan Pls could you explain this to me?
Did he like smoke or snorted something?
And that was the trigger?
LibraGirl, his family left him alone?
Sometimes I feel the same exact way, but other times I feel like it’s the reason I am who I am, and I like who I am. It’s very confusing!
My brother suffers with schizophrenia and I’ve worked with adult males with the same diagnosis. What I find most amazing is the similarities of voices, concepts, thoughts, directions, concerns, heroism, symbolism, afflictions. It makes you want to map it out and see how it’s possible. Thank you Chris for sharing your experience. You are loved.
Agreed very much so
I met a schizophrenic in the early 90's and he was an ex-DOD lawyer and totally insane but brilliant at the same time.
I was kind of annoyed how Mark kept saying "that's crazy". I must have a little schizophrenia myself because I understood what he was talking about and wanted to ask certain questions to get him to explain his thoughts more. It's not totally random nonsense. There's a method to his madness.
@@stopthephilosophicalzombie9017 yes, but that would only encourage him more into madness, I also felt like wanting to know more of his stories but that would mean to only enterntain myself with someone elses illness.
@@adriancastaneda9088 I didn't mean to encourage it but to get a sense for what his triggers were and so forth. Just saying "that's crazy" isn't interesting.
love how he is so real with no bullshit, his personality shines through his illness. i really like this guy
He’s not real and is full of bullshit. He’s a drug addict who fried his brain he was not born with schizophrenia he said he did heavy drugs age 25-27 then became schizo at 29. Just another drug addict.
As do I.
He reminds me of my friend who passed away, I think he would be his twin if he had shorter hair and a goatee. Mental illness and addiction is so pitiful and painful.
Agree
My brother has schizophrenia and it’s so hard to see him wither away. He’s always been one of the smartest and kindest people I know, but turned into a drug addict because of his mental illness because it’s the only thing that distracts his brain from the voices and hallucinations. The system is broken for these people and they are damned to living in the street, jail, or death eventually, I worry about him constantly. Thank you for humanizing humanities most vulnerable. These people need more of a voice and more help than they get.
exactly..
💯 🙏🙏🙏
For sure…that’s what my mind kept thinking about while watching
@@aquarianyogi555my heart goes out to you. Jesus heals all ❤
It is hell
People with mental illness are often dehumanized. Thank you for talking to this man as though he’s a real person ❤
He is a person, can't say that for everyone involved in your mouth-breather-exhale of a comment you anti-drug coddled clod
they are?
@@AlistairBalisterIMO - Yes, they are. If you look back historically throughout the ages mental illness has been looked upon as something sinful or bad that the person has brought on himself/herself. In other words, if the person had believed in God a certain way, prayed enough, etc. he/she would not have been punished. Another backward thinking idea was that the devil somehow controlled a person due to his/her moral weakness. That is like saying an individual got diabetes because God was inflicting bad things on a person for some religious infraction. "Modern" health insurance, for the most part, does not address the true issues or help pay for the treatment costs.
dudes fucking tweaking , how about laying off the drugs? oh right no father figure
bad phrasing but i get what you mean
It's amazing how on-the-line he is between his delusions, reality, and his own self awareness. I pray he's able to gain control of it and remain able to know what's real and what's in his mind. He definitely seems like a good guy under it all, unfortunately things like meth and staying up for days on end aren't going to help him at all. Would love to see a follow up of this guy in the future
even if im happy to see his work i think mark made a step further interviewing people totally high and make it clear from 3 parties (us, and both himself and the interviewee). even if harder to see, i'd rather prefer to listen to this guy sober, even if it seems difficult lol.
#JeanDupont
Lol. This is perfect. At no time during ANY these interviews is your "comfort" the point. The idea is for us to see the person, their problems, how their life experiences do or do not relate to their current or ongoing situation, and to help people understand others & our own selves better. In any interview any time, any one of the interviewees may be on a substance. We gain more from any interview if the person being interviewed is honest. This person was more honest than most people ever are in any type of interview. Think about that. People with schizophrenia are like the general public in the fact that some of them do take illegal or legal substances & some of them don't. We need to have an understanding of what changes may happen in both/all scenarios of people with schizophrenia. The same as we do with people who don't have it.
He is certainly managing a lot. Exhausting to manage I am sure.
@@jeandupont4939 "even if it seems difficult" no, then Mark would be the same as the rest of society. Refusing to listen or interact with anyone who falls through the cracks. The beauty of Mark's content is seeing people as they are in that moment, like a photo but in video format. If you are not aware of Mark's previous work you should look it up. You'll understand, then, why he does his interviews this way.
Most people can tell a difference but it doesn’t make it less scary
I've never seen a schizophrenic describe their disease so objectively. Maybe because he's medicated and not in an active episode. Fascinating!
It's an illness not a disease since we don't know the cause.
Nah he’s j high asf lil
@@micgil4193 interesting take. I hear you, and your description of disease is quite accurate. Though, the Mayo clinic considers schizophrenia a brain disease.
It's quite something, though he seems quite disconnected from reality
@@willmclelland1910 Source? Their website classes it as a severe mental disorder
This is so dam sad, praying for Chris fr. Im 25 and also have schizophrenia; he needs to stop doing drugs, even weed. My schizophrenia was caused by weed and it’s sad to see how positive the media portrays weed when it can in fact lead to outcomes like this. Hopefully one day he quits the drugs so his symptoms won’t be as severe. Almost shed a tear watching this😔😢Lord give us strength 🙏🤲 You are in gods hands Chris 🙌🫶
If you look up actual research, weed seems to "kindle" schizophrenia, sometimes.
Having a traumatic brain injury also raises risk for schizophrenia, as well as other mental health issues.
@matty5471 @grmpEqweer you are both correct:
THC is the compound in weed that can trigger schizophrenia. THC is also the compound that gets you high; because of that, people try to get weed with higher contents of THC.
CBD is the compound in weed that "seems to 'kindle' schizophrenia". CBD is an antipsychotic and is renowned for its affects of decreasing anxiety, depression, insomnia, schizophrenia, etc. CBD does not get you high, which is why people who smoke weed have been wanting less content of CBD in weed and higher amounts of THC.
Weed brings out any mental illness someone may have dormant in their brain/genetics. More people should talk about this. Not only can it activate schizophrenia, it can also activate someone’s bipolar, Tourette’s syndrome, psychosis, basically so many serious mental diseases and disorders. I can’t think of every name off the top of my head but you get the point
@matty5471 I’m 29 and schizoaffective. The drugs do fuck it up and definitely brought out the dormant genes in me. I’m trying to cope and live a normal life with such an abnormal condition. Hoping we both make it through
@@boopy12g yo bro im schizoaffective too and theres no doubt that this shit really fuckin sucks lol. We both know what its like to struggle everyday living with such a shitty condition but despite our struggle we have to always remember that we are in gods hands and that better days lie ahead. Stay strong bro manifesting nothing but greatness and good fortune for you🙏🙌
My heart goes out to Chris. I was married to someone that had this mental illness. Sadly he took his life at the age of 27. I am 62 now, and hearing Chris reminds me of what my husband went through. Mental illness should be talked about without feeling judged. My husband was labeled crazy never judge someone you don't know their journey. Chris, I see you.
That's so much to carry through life. If you're willing to share, I'd love to know how you saw it progress in your husband and if you were able to get him any type of help. Must have been so terrifying and scary to watch someone you love lose touch with reality. Sending love and light to you.
@@47nodoubt I'm 47 and still say mental illness but am on my awakening journey so have only recently realized this a gift not mental illness. If the older generation aren't awake, they only know it as a mental illness. My dad was schizophrenic and only have realized over the last 4 years of my awakening he wasn't bat shit crazy.
@@gem_ineye76 ya because your dumb as hell 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@47nodoubtif he wasn’t on crystal meth I would believe it his hallucinations are because he is high af on drugs that really alter reality and who wants that when nobody sees what you see lol it’s like this guy that literally got high in jail and was knocked out on the bed looking like he is dying because his eyes are open tbh dude looked dead but I bet in his mind he was living his best life .
I am a little bit shaking about this... But I was able to get like a 65% of the data Chris said he hallucinated.
And A) I was about to get this "ilness" too or B)I'm not even close of being mental il and however I could get some patterns also.
All things about binary code about affirmative, negative. A woman's screamimg heared in the water and even once a weird dance, that was not a dance in fact was like making a key with the body.
Like you could get ahead only trespassing like an exact way for that moment of the existence.
It felt like a supreme control of the body, cause the normal walking just stopped and my mind found a certain way of pass by that place.
That was the only ever time that happened.
One day sick of being "slave of myself" I did track the moment when everything started to happen. Some kind of fusion between sinesthesya and numerology and exagrams studies just collided, and my young mind used that to face the hard family social time.
The other thing I found is that Mind projects intuition on the outside when you can't connect with it internal way.
Now the curious thing about this is how many congruents things or patterns could work the same way all around the World.
May be is for the constantly bomb up of politics news around the world and the side effects of constantly use of technology. I don't know...
But it's super curious the similitudes or similarities
I worked with homeless people, and it’s so sad how so many people like Chris get lost in life because it’s so hard to function in society while schizophrenic. I hope he finds peace.
A lot of homeless schizophrenic people are also so sweet and nice like Chris.
He spoke out against some of the evil. So they broke his mind.
It's a punishment issued to truth tellers.
@@TheIntJuggler There are local agencies which will come out to you if someone is having a mental health crisis. The person just has to agree to seek help.
Most often, if the schizophrenia can be treated, and there is no drug use, a person can live a pretty stable life.
There's also behavioral health centers which can help. Usually the individual knows what they're experiencing isn't right, and just ask them if they want help, and assure them the help is available.
I would reach out to any services beforehand.
Just remember, the individual totally believes what they're perceiving, and you can't get angry with them, try and guide the thinking to a more positive place.
I wish you the best of luck. God be with you.
@@paulgibbons2320 Ah yes, the famous "they"
The purpose of an invisible torment would be to torment someone anonymously so they might never be held accountable. So the 'unseen hand' is referred to as 'THEY'. Those who we might suspect.We might never know. If they left a calling card we could pay them a visit an put our torments to rest in person now couldn't we?
I’ve never seen any interview like this before. I’ve never seen a coherent schizophrenic articulate what they’re going through so clearly and articulate their thoughts and why they did certain things yet know it’s psychosis at the same time. He has astounding self awareness and communicates his experiences so clearly. Such an amazing and meaningful insight to what this population goes through. He seems like a wonderful bright, intelligent, kind and genuine young man. Sending you light Chris.
yea pretty crazy
Imagine yourself with a hangover, taking LSD, and hearing every noise and every thought and every interrelationship at the same intensity all at once…. Then trying to focus on a single thread….
Exhausting. This also happens with some forms of mania and autism/ADD…..
Nah men there are lots of coherent schizophrenics that even have youtube channels you should check them out. The bad thing about Chris is that he uses hard drugs and that doesn't help. But that is impressive on it's own because he adds fuel to his schizophrenia and still he makes a lot of sense and he's so aware of himself.
If you have a combination of medications that work well, it helps make this possible. I'm speaking from having schizophrenia myself and knowing many people with it throughout the years.
He admitted to smoking methamphetamine (crystal) that morning, surprised he was able to articulate anything at all, never mind be coherent.
This one has me choked up. I pray Chris has some peaceful moments from his mind. 😢
he’s making it up
I know it’s been repeated - but please have him back. In such a short time, he allowed us into the depths of his hellish affliction in such a concise way. He was amazing.
“I keep getting approached by dudes, I think it’s the hair.” And he is funny as hell.
He has the potential to turn his issue around and do something even like stand-up!
You guys realize he's high on meth right? lol
@connor it's the meth bro
Yes, a real sense of humor.
I’m watching this interview for the 3rd time just within 5 days..I loveee him😂😂😂..he has to be my favourite honestly.
Part 2 is needed . Chris is a very interesting person to listen to and had the audience engaged the entire time . Hope he gets the help he needs .
@@isabellamcevoy3756that’s a part two on a different schizophrenic Chris
Please bring him back for additional interviews. And please let him know how much love there is for him, as well as respect, and an open-mind to everything he has to say.
I'm 34 and had one random-ass schizophrenic episode a year or so back. Never had one before and haven't had one since. Lasted about a week. No drugs, but quite a bit of stress due to work, moving, and family stuff. Never knew I was prone to experiencing it.
Showers have always been my decompression therapy. I talk to myself in the shower and tend to be very philosophical and existential. One day, I was in the shower doing the same routine, and it hit me. Like a punch in the face. An "attack". I felt this overwhelming sense of horror and dread. I didn't know what to do or think at the time, so jumped out of the shower, tracking water everywhere. I lived alone at the time, and just ran around naked for a while, sat down wet as shit on the couch.
My first instinct was to call someone. But I worked the evening shift, so when I got home it was late at night, and I didn't want to call and bother anyone. So I just tried to make sense of it on my own and figure out what the fuck just happened.
It wasn't a panic attack. I'd had those before and was very familiar with them. It was something else. There was still ringing in my ears, as if I'd just been through a war zone. If I thought about it too much or tried to recall what led up to the "attack", that same dread feeling would come over me. It terrified me.
My brain was on fire trying to figure it out. I thought maybe a demon attacked me, or there was a chemical leak somewhere, or we were under attack and the chemical war was on. But I eventually settled on the conclusion that the universe had simply showed me something humankind wasn't meant to see. Maybe I saw it in the past or future, but I just had a glimpse of it right then and there. Just a small taste. And it was too overwhelming to bare. So my memory was wiped - by aliens. Yes, aliens. (This was just before all the alien stuff came out.)
I felt ashamed and psychotic and so didn't tell anyone out of fear of judgement. Because I knew how crazy and stupid it sounded from a rational perspective. I never had visual or auditory hallucinations, but the delusion was very strong and very real. I tried to ignore it and move on, but it was hard. All week I slept with the lights on, and had my cats shut in the bathroom with me when I took showers, and played video games constantly to keep myself disengaged from reality. I felt like I was constantly being watched and became incredibly paranoid. I didn't even feel safe with my gun. I felt like I could be "attacked" by some supernatural entity again at any moment, or permanently placed in this version of hell I apparently saw and couldn't remember. It was exhausting.
After about a week of nothing else happening and trying my best to ignore it, I finally gained some courage and looked stuff up online. I was led to schizophrenia. And it all clicked. I have a history of anxiety, depression, and OCD - I remember having to fight those nasty tics and behaviors as a teen. I was prone to symptoms of schizophrenia, and a schizophrenic episode was triggered by stress. I finally spoke to my mom about it and felt a lot better. I felt sane again. And life went on as normal.
I took a small dip in the life of a paranoid schizophrenic and holy fuck, I can't imagine living your entire life there. It's beyond horrifying.
i had my first and only panic attack 3 months ago. i was, too, having deep existential thoughts as usual. you described it perfectly: " If I thought about it too much or tried to recall what led up to the "attack", that same dread feeling would come over me". i know in your case it wasnt a panic attack, but i felt exactly as if, if i tried to trace back the thought i had the exact second it struck me, this overwhelming immensity would come to me again, as if the whole universe was cornering my mind. i was at a hotel by the beach back then, and the sounds of the breaking waves of the sea didnt help at all. i still wonder what would have happened if i had actually followed this thought, and not stopped myself as soon as i recognised it as a panic attack. it literally felt as if i had thought of a WRONG thought, a prohibited thought that i wasnt supposed to think of as a human.
@@aguspxe my mum had his first episode and it went away then schizophrenia came later like a year later and it was worse
the big factor when you are in stress.
You don't have enough sleep the brain function
is affected so if you know how to handle your stress
and there is hope to deminish the symptoms.
Ptsd episode there is similarity symptoms of schizophrenic
you are constantly fearful and flash back. Did you consult
a professional help and you need a proper diagnose.?Sometimes
this constant fear comes from spiritual warfare and there is demonic
attack, anyway I'm just giving an example.Anyway, some Dr. or phsycologist
they don't believe that there is a demonic attack instead there is a chemical
imbalance in the brain. If you are Christian read Psalm 23 and 35 before you
settle down.
I hope you got down on your knees and prayed. EVERYTIME you feel like something spiritual is happening it probably is and I’ve found that praying really helps especially for us who struggle mentally. Sending hugs xx
I think there is imbalance of dophamine
and you have to see a professsional help.
sometimes there is spiritual warfare that it
will missed you up.
My best friend growing up was the most straight edge, clear thinking person I knew. He smoked weed for the first time at 18 and immediately had psychosis and was diagnosed with schizophrenia, spent 2 years in the mental hospital. He has never been the same. He’s 34
I was driving yesterday in my hometown and saw a QR code on a telephone pole advertising for giving medical marijuana and this is in Kentucky. The enemy wants to the whole world to see getting high as a a great time without consequences.
I grew up with someone that got hold of some bad drugs and he also was never the same. I often wonder what happened to him.
Same with this guy I was talking to… he came from horrific abuse, started smoking weed and still does, schizophrenia diagnosis. I’m convinced it was brought on by the weed.
Substance use can bring an already underlying or dormant condition like psychosis or schizophrenia to the surface. As a trigger indeed, that's all it does or can do. Weed or LSD for example is never the direct cause of such an illness. Just thought I'd share
@@misterik11 a little research confirms your statement, but some need to demonize it out of fear and lack of understanding or wanting to learn and understand.
Chris seems to be an Intelligent, interesting and sweet spirited person with a great smile. Mental illness is such a misunderstood situation and not at all enough funding. One thing that stood out is when he said a man yelling at you on the street might be protecting you, in his eyes. I pray he can get some housing/safety/security and maybe on better meds. Chris, you are in my prayers.
Better meds
It’s not mental illness it’s drug addiction (not the same thing) this dudes been lying for so long that he believes everything he says. I know a lot of dudes like this who claim certain ailments but are just drug addicts and liars. Drug addiction is the problem.
I can say from personal experience that meth causes psychosis it is drug-induced and his mental illness will improve if he refrains from drugs.
@@stephaniecoomey2356 what medical school did you graduate from?
@@stephaniecoomey2356 so not true.
My son is diagnosed with schizophrenia. He has been so courageous. People have no idea what he has endured. It takes great strength. My heart goes out to those who experience this brain disease and those who could no longer endure and to those loved ones who lost people.
i have it i think people with it are very misunderstood and everyone around them want to conform em to their reality instead of trying to understand theres
I know. My son was diagnosed at age 24 and he is 29 now. He's never been homeless, but only because his girlfriend called me from Seattle and told me "something was off." It was the day after Thanksgiving. Been a wild ride since then. We found a fantastic doctor out of state who helped get him on clozapine and he has been stable for two years. When he is psychotic, he sounds just like Chris.
@@sajm8815that’s exactly it , your state of mind it’s on the right track
@@sajm8815idk , they act as if something they can’t figure out on their own , and be their protector instead of pills
Right here with you!
“I still have shoes on. That’s a good sign.” 26:04
This is amazing. Thanks for this window into your life, Chris.
Thank you Mark for this interview and educating on schizophrenia.
My son started hearing voices around 18, after many years of medications, therapy, ect treatment, ketamine, a few hospital stays, alternative therapies , he only got worse. He was constantly paranoid & depressed He believed people in his apartment building were conspiring to kill him. He couldn’t hold a job due to hearing evil voices. I would ask him what they’re saying, he said he couldn’t tell me. He would on occasion use drugs, I imagine to try to get a break.
He stopped taking his meds, said he was tired of fighting the demons. I called a crisis unit to his apartment on May 2, 2018 to do an evaluation. He had bought a pistol. I physically fought him for it for almost two hours trying to get the pistol from him, I begged, prayed , and cried while he had tears in his eyes & said he believed they were coming to get him to rape him. When the sheriff knocked on the door, he shot himself in the heart. As a mom, you want to fix this, save your child. He was 30. I’m heartbroken everyday & mad that life had been so unfair to him.
Again, thanks Mark!
I’m so sorry to hear that. As someone with schizophrenia it’s definitely not easy living with at all, God bless you lady. Sorry about your son I hope he is at peace now. Just know that it’s not your fault.
💔🙏🏼🤍my condolences much Love and healing to you.
❤️❤️❤️❤️🙏
I am so sorry for you and your son. What a horrible thing to have to witness. My heart breaks for you and I know there is nothing I can say to help. Perhaps the only comfort is that your son is no longer struggling in the hell of this world. Sending so much love and strength to you ❤️🩹❤️🩹
I’m so sorry for your loss.
my boyfriend had schizophrenia but he refused treatment idk why and we lost him last year, from suicide, he was the only person who truly ever showed me kindness and real love. such a pure and beautiful soul taken so soon. i hope he knew how much we all loved him.
Sorry for your loss
@@photentthat old chestnut
I´m so sorry about that. I hope that you will find love again in the future.
💗
yes, that happened to my father. Smoking weed basically unmasked his schizophrenia. He took his own life on October 18 2013, 5 days after my 8th birthday while having an episode.
How astonishing he is able to function with in the dual reality of his mind. He is navigating between worlds and I find him so fascinating. I hope he will be ok and find peace.
I wonder how much drugs have caused/affected his psychosis. Wishing for peace for him🙏💜
I was surprised by the same thing - functional duality. Maybe they are canaries in the coal mine for our future?!
@@Angela-hv9jv As an ex lsd user i have to say a lot. Dont get fooled by this guy , there is a chance that he thinks he is on schizo trip on this interview and that Mark isnt real.
He’s also smoking crystal meth, so there’s that.
Factual and well said without saying☺️
Wow. Amazing interview. We have my schizophrenic brother-in-law living with us the last five years, who spent 35 years exactly this way on the streets of Sacramento. Now he's medicated, but when he first got to us in 2019 he was out of his head in exactly the same kinds of ways I hear in Chris's tale. A very sudden education in the realities of mental illness for our four teenage children at home at that time. We live in NY, and were informed one day (by a friend who'd looked out for him in CA all those years) that he was done with California and wanted to come "home" now. We had three days to get ourselves together before he was on our doorstep. It's not always easy, but this interview reminds me that his reality is different from ours, but just as real to him. I pray for patience 🙏
As a mental health professional who specializes in severe mental illnesses such as schizophrenia, I can't emphasize how much the phrase "it's just weed" hits me. So many of my patients smoked marijuana just ONCE (and NOT laced) and it flipped the switch for psychosis. If you are genetically predisposed to mental illness, especially schizophrenia and bipolar, just once doing a drug is all it can take. This hurts my heart!
Also, his level of insight, his symptoms, and describing his mothers psychosis reminds me more of schizoaffective disorder made worse by street drug use.
There exists a test to find out the presence of genes and the genetic markers that induce schizophrenia.
Is the said test reliable?
I smoked when I was 19 and had a horrible horrible trip from marijuana! Two years later I had a mental break down Major Depressive Disorder and panic disorder. I’ve never been the same since and I’m now 45. You’re so correct on the “it’s just weed.” I can’t stress enough how this drug can affect someone’s life like it did mine.
@@godwhispersinmyearsinsleep5351 That is a good question: we are only so good at decoding the human genome and it's not 100% accurate yet.
Im 25, smoked weed for 3 years, then one day randomly fell under psychosis for 2 weeks, i was out of my mind. Ive never felt the same since. I was never warned. As a mother now myself i will make sure my child knows the dangers. It is not just weed.
@@ARasputinaFan thank for answering me, do you know of BPD and Cluster B's disorders in general are part of the schizoaffective disorders?
So handsome and so intelligent. Reminds me of my dad who also has schizophrenia. Totally warm and approachable but he truly believes people are spying on him through the phone and that people are out to kill him. I really hope they find a cure for schizophrenia, I’ve witnessed my dad so terrified at times, it’s really unfair that some people have to live like this.
Let’s make a schizophrenic baby😏
@@juju755-b7s I’d rather not.
There is a cure, The Tallman Paradigm
Does he act like that with you too at home?
Well, people are actually spying on all of us through our phones but that's a whole different conversation. They're called the NSA, CIA, Mossad, and a variety of other international intelligence agencies funded to create a quiet and comfortable police state. It's an updated and more civilized approach to what the Bolsheviks, Nazis and Maoists envisioned for society. Cheers
“Don’t get jaded. Don’t take things as blasé just because you live experienced them before, you can probably find new aspects to them if you look hard enough”
That’s a perfectly coherent piece of advice.
I agree.
Agreed
Your old steam games really wanted to hear this advice.
I hadn't seen Chris story until I saw the " updated " version. 😮 OMG it broke my heart to see him once sooooooo physically healthy and seemingly OK. He is literally living in his own personal hell😢
I don't think that's the same Chris
I've never heard shizophrenia been so well described before. The terror and agony, man...what a brutal mental illness. Somehow I think it must be even more rough when he can step aside and see it from a pure logic perspective. Almost like hes looking in from the outside. Fuck man, life is not fair. I really, really hope that you find your way one day dude. Much love.
Whats funny about what you said is it makes me think about the movie alice through the looking glass. My mom had schizophrenia and it was some serious stuff but i can only imagine what it would be like if it was at least in a positive manor for their episodes because my mom had nothing but horrible episodes and she saw some dark stuff.
It's demons. And can be cured with an exorcism and commitment to Christ.
Mental illness?? He said it's an extra terrestrial being
well, everything he said i see too, if you sungaze you see black grey orbs so thats not a hallucination i've asked everyone and they all see the same thing. as for the voices I'm unsure of, no way anyone can say he doesn't no reason to make that up. It's easy for the commoner to cast him away as "crazy" so they can't consider the things he is saying are what he experiences. the meth and other shit is just degenerate.
@@Mark_Tschetter thats up for debate but it is a mental illness
He seems so normal till he touches on certain subjects. My daughter is going through the same thing and she too believes talking about it will mess up her connection to some being so no one believes she is sick. Her sister and i are the only ones close enough to her to tell and she cut us off because we want her ti get help. We are going through a real hard time...Im so glad I saw this man's story. She is 27 and it just started with her. "Perfectly sensible but saying rediculous things"
Thank you soooo much for this
My daughter has paranoid schizophrenia. People have no idea of the struggle. She refuses to medicate and the disease continues to ravage our family. It's very hard to have hope, when you learn more about the diagnosis
Yo, I watched a documentary about art from people with mental illnesses and they found that the art by people with schizophrenia from around the world had incredible similarities. The reoccurring theme was that ‘being’ and they all drew, like, lines and rays and waves things like that, some type of connection, that goes from the ‘being’ to their heads. I can’t remember the name of the documentary. Sry your daughter is dealing with that. I you, her, and your family, the best.
Lia Anderson please look up target individuals and v2k technology please don't take me as some coo coo crazy man this is real
Same my sister just turned 27 it's hard growing up with someone and seeing them change so dramatically right before your eyes and no matter how much you wanna help they have to want to receive help
I had a Brother that died with schizophrenia. I made it my life mission to help people with this illness.
Have you ever seen that movie "Insidious"?
Sorry for your loss
My son got it at 17 I am so sorry
How do you help them?
I'm nuts
My son had a friend with schizophrenia, she was such a lovely, darling girl. She committed suicide when in her 20"s. It's a horrific illness, my heart goes out to sufferers,, dealing with this every day must be exhausting
I've known several people with Schizophrenia of varying degrees that can't go near weed. It has a super negative impact on their brain chemistry. I'm sure harder drugs do, too. I have family that have schizophrenia and I'm glad you did this interview. It's a really hard thing to go through from the outside but imagine if it was you experiencing things like this. Your interviews, I think, help humanize the whole situation. Thank you, Mark.
Exactly the opposite with me, I know schizophrenic people who need the herb to control their emotions! Chris obviously had some laced weed, sad situation!! I feel so sorry for him!
@@twinpyramid5985 Nothing to do with "laced" weed.. it's just weed .. I've been close to three people with skitz.. they all want to smoke weed and will say it helps them but it doesn't at all ..
@@twinpyramid5985 I'm all for weed use, but healthy children and schizophrenics are the exceptions.
There is no one answer for if weed is harmful or helpful to their psychosis. Because our high from person to person is different. Our physiology is different so of course our High would be different.
So true!!! Weed is quite possibly one of the absolute WORST things they can do when they already have schizophrenia..
He is a beautiful man, with a good heart; you can tell. So sad that he is suffering by this disease. I wish him all the best and I hope that he get´s a chance to a safer life! He deserves peace in his thoughts, and the drugs should not have a place in his body.
Schizophrenia is such a difficult disease. No words to describe how much these individuals and their families struggle. Bless them all.
His family to always worry about him… bless all of them. He doesn’t want to stay in a hospital- his meds don’t even stop the voices 😢💔
Yeah my mom took her live ❤😢😢😢😢
@@kevinipoppedchainzmainesince the involuntary movements make me think he is on haldol.
Such a smart chap, cannot believe he's homeless. Same my auntie, my mum's sis, he's judge with schizofrenia also such a nice person, carrying, honest, modest just like Chris. Thank you for this upload.
He gives a insanely perfect insight into the mind of the person you see on the street yelling at themselves.
@@jeffb9850 man why you gotta tell me that
@@jeffb9850Schizo
no, those are just drug addicts
Yanno what?
If someone is approaching me out in the city, and they give me those predatory vibes?
Sometimes I will start arguing with the sky.
This tends to make them back off.
touché!
I was glued to his story like never before. Stay safe Chris I’m routing for you. Your a good guy.
Word, this guy can still make it, just keep your medication right and keep being that good person.
@@tobenfarrell1334 Should probably stop smoking weed/meth as well. Meth isn't helping the anxiety or hallucinations.
He seems sweet, kind and just a good person.❤🙏🏽
rooting*
Indeed. This young man is magnetic with his story. May God help him, or help us to help him. We are all so lucky.
This was a deeply compassionate exploration of a human being who has been so often overlooked and ignored by society. Fascinating!
This was such a heartbreaking and eye-opening interview, I'm glad that Soft White Underbelly is shedding light on these important issues. OTR should also tackles these topics in Manila!
Very eye-opening video!
Like abandoned , i just dont know could stuff like this be noticed early?
The car horn in the background was his confirmation. He’s not crazy!
He clearly is though and people like you who say dumb stuff doesn't help
for sure, tapped into god consciousness ! He isn't crazy. Must just get a bit tiring
This happens to me daily n they tell me I'm schizophrenic
@@BillTheButcher95 I feel like you are the one not understanding in this instance.
@@SkyScannerBtowntell me more about the god consciousness please
He could be a model. Really handsome and well spoken. It’s heartbreaking to hear all the chaos in his head. Hope he can get help and get clean
I was thinking the same.
Yeah his teeth are still in good shape. It's too bad the medications for schizophrenia only do so much when you're doing drugs.
Yeah he could be a model for what a schizo is lol
Maybe you and him can hookup? You may be his salvation.
@@stopthephilosophicalzombie9017 Because everyone knows that the worst risk of meth is tooth decay... You can get dental implants, but you can't replace your brain.
This is why Housing First programs are so so important. Chris’s symptoms weren’t as severe when his basic needs were met but because he uses substances, he lost his housing. We need to have more programs like Housing First where regardless of someone’s substance use or severe mental illness, they will have access to permanent housing. His condition would likely improve significantly and he would be able to pursue other goals in life.
Thanks for sharing Chris’s story :)
I can’t even imagine living this way, not knowing what’s real and what’s not. How terrifying.
Don't go down the rabbit hole ;)
Would love an update with him in the future. Great interview!
This is the absolute most facinating person. Out of psychosis, he is basically normal and is caught between two worlds. He has me now looking up schizophrenics not on psychosis. I am used to the addicts vids, but this one was the absolute most fascinating!!!
He is super high as he speaks
Despite being absolutely terrifying, I find schizophrenia to be fascinating. The first person I ever ran across afflicted with it was as in jail, and the gibberish he was saying drew me in completely. To me, it’s always sounded like the worst heavy acid trip you could ever take, except it lasts forever. That’s scary as hell.
Yeah, I've experienced similar things through psychedelics, but that was after over 20 hits, a gram of mushrooms, and honey infused with about a gram of butane hash. But I was only at that level for a few hours before I passed the peak and could work my way through it objectively, and I was completely lucid the next day, although it wasn't until the day after that that I was fully sober, Having that degree of hallucination as just an everyday aspect of your life just sounds extremely debilitating. My experience was intense, but overall I processed it and found a way to be more comfortable with my existence. With schizophrenia, you don't get that clarity and ability to sit back and work through it with a sober mind. It sounds terrifying, and I truly hope that he can find a way to stabilize and get the help he needs
15:00 15:08
yeah it's like a living dream
I agree, it is SO fascinating. I always think there is some truth behind some of their delusions. Like his mind telling him to stay away from technology because it will harm his "magic" inside... It could be that he is so sensitive to external stimuli that he can feel the radiation/waves from the phones. I know that is an actual thing to certain people that are very sensitive.
Its also frightening because its not always active/obvious with everyone. I used to work with a friend who had it and he was fine the entire day, but when we took our break together he suddenly got a look in his eyes and started saying I look like an alien, asking if I can read his mind, all that kind of stuff. He was the smartest guy I knew and he probably still is, but hes certainly troubled. He doesnt take his meds because he doesnt believe theres anything wrong with im, even after being diagnosed.
I watched this video because my brother was a paranoid schizophrenic and took his own life in an extremely violent way. He hid his condition from me and I am always interested to learn more. Chris's interview helps me understand how all-consuming the illness truly is, and how hard it is to function in society when you have it. Also, this was one of my favorite interviews. I laughed a lot and found his inner-world so fascinating and brilliant. Thank you for sharing. 💛
for sure, psychosis is no joke, it's like a waking nightmare they think is real
yes, that happened to my father. smoking weed basically unmasked his schizophrenia. He took his own life on October 18 2013, 5 days after my 8th birthday while having an episode.
One of the most fascinating interviews I have ever seen. Such a handsome and articulate man. Heart wrenching. Thank you for giving this lovely man a voice. So much could be learned by mental health professionals with this interview. No wonder he experiments with drugs!
Chris is one of my new faves. He seems very aware of what he’s dealing with but what can he honestly do about it. I really like that he was so candid and I truly wish the best for him
He's ...your new favorite schizophrenic tragedy case your witnessing? What were the old favorites? Very bizarre way of framing things...
@@johnscott6481
Stop making something out of nothing...you're worse than God, lol
Me to !! Usually within 10 seconds I can tell if I like or don’t very easily and some of these people are hard to like. This guy isn’t hard to like at all !! He’s actually kinda funny and his attitude towards the disease he got saddled with his phenomenal!!!!!
@John Scott I assume they meant that it's there favorite Guest interview they've seen. Was a strange way to frame it but I understood it when I read it. Welcome to 2023 most people talk like this. I've done it too. I'm sure you have. Also I wouldn't consider it a tragedy, thats argueable just as much of a strange frame of perspective. We dont even know what conciousness is or what exactly is happening in a schizophrenic persons brain. They could be tapping into something that most people don't have the ability to tap into. As a person whos abnormally creative and has PTSD and had crippling OCD I think relate heavily to a lot of schizophrenic people, but I'm not schizophrenic.
New favorite freak. Nice one.... Lol
Sometimes broken minds are the most intelligent and beautiful minds. This guy is amazing. Sending him lots of love!!
that's so true and sad at the same time
there is noting intelligent about this dude. he was doing acid and crystal and weed. not so smart.
Very true
sad they dont last long most of the time
Some of the stuff he's saying is legit though. That one eye stuff is everywhere symbolically. Goodwill symbol is one eye, LG and taco bell and CBS logo is an eye etc..But then other stuff he says is like ehhh that's kinda out there. Seems like a pretty cool dude actually
I used to work in psych. Many of them are that in tune with their psychosis. One in particular knew when she was getting sick because John Lennon would “come and talk to her”. She’d literally say on admission “John came back so, I’m here”. She was cute as a button…one of my favorite patients, actually.
I’m trying to sign John Lennon, I have to die in Fremont California
@@eltravos99it's called rational thinking
I work in mental health as well and I even notice their pupil change when they start hearing voices there’s another lady ears get blood shot red it’s sad
You know how humans only use a percentage of their brain? I genuinely think that the mental health community actually knows 3% of the spiritual dimension of psychosis and schizophrenia. That is why it’s so freaking heartbreaking. I know there will be a breakthrough but it could take a hundred years. Thank you for trying and showing compassion.
@@loveinthematrixwhat does that even mean
i think this is one of my favourite interviews on swu. chris seems like a really cool dude, really hope he's alright!
The important thing to understand, he doesn't "think" this stuff, he "knows". I have schizophrenia and when I had bad symptoms, I "knew" what was going on, I didn't "think" it was happening.
Man, a follow up with Chris if he could be 100% sober would be fascinating. So hard to know how much of what he was saying was because of the recent drug use vs his schizophrenia. Either way, such a sad situation but his upbeat attitude really just makes you feel for him.
yeah i think it was a bit too much to interview him like that, too. i see theses guys as so unpredictable on a deeper level than anyway he might never come back at mark's.
Right. He literally smoked crystal meth the morning of this interview lol.
It really is hard. Antipsychotics cause restlessness like what's being observed -- lots of body movements.
Thought the same thing . Acid and meth alone cause people to go into psychosis this dude just needs to get control of his drug use and he'd be so much better off
Exactly, first time he experienced it was just smoking weed, only time it went away was when he was in jail. Good chance first episode he got some weed laced with something else
My dear son is 34, shares many of the traits and experiences as this young man. He also uses many drugs and has spent time in jail. Currently he is trying to get clear enough to plead his case. He is in a state mental hospital. The system really has no good plan or way to help these people. They are in a cycle, a trap.
My son was a Medic in the US Army and is a brilliant human even in his psychosis. He is sad, depressed and suicidal. I’m so sorry to all these people. It hurts to see this.
I'm sorry about your son. Thank you for sharing. It's so important to talk about these things.
My brother's name is Chris and hes schizophrenic. Sad and difficult to deal with. Very sad
God Bless you and your son. I was never diagnosed with schizophrenia but had psychosis. Believing if I slept, the demons would get me. It led to somniphobia, and bc I never slept (maybe 2 hrs a day), my body started to shut down. I'm better now, and while I can never understand what you are going through, I do understand the fear and helplessness of mental illness. Prayers that you and your son find peace. ❤
Sending all the best thoughts and all the prayers I can send to you sir. What a hellacious disease.
At least he has you, most are all alone.
I love how he’s genuinely who he is without holding back. It makes me sad that he has to live life this way. He seems like a really cool guy
I feel so bad for this man. I can see a light inside him when he smiles. I hope he finds the peace that he needs in this life ❤
he on meth
for real you can tell this is a good person
Dear Heavenly Father, we just ask that you bring peace, comfort and protection over this man and that you place a hedge of protection around him while you guide him to a place of safety, healing and love. In Jesus Sweet Name Amen
.... ... Chris Will. ...👍😊🙏❤️💯🙌🫶
@@Godswarrior-3711that’s the answer to all his problems: Jesus Christ.
I lost one of my best friends this week to schizophrenia. He hung on for 20 years, but couldn't take it any longer. It is such a nasty disorder. Mark, thank you for shedding light on this topic.
sorry for your loss
Sorry for your loss. Truly the most evil illness.
May he RIP.
Someone I work with told me they are schizophrenic I don't know why she told me this but I pray 🙏 for her ❤
😭
Please have him back on!!! Please Mark. This one had me liked hooked, hooked. I watch them everyday. It's how I start my morning drive lol. Been watching for like 4-5 yrs
You sound giddy, and unhinged in this context.if your hooked on this your having a little ghoulish life moment
@@johnscott6481 or an interest in human behavior, thoughts and actions from those we might not hear from if not for marks channel 😊
I love what this guy is doing with these interviews. Educating people about schizophrenia, bravo! It's a beautiful thing.
What a handsome guy. I hope he stays safe out on the street. He seems to love experimenting with street drugs. Very sad. It has to be heartbreaking for his family.
Recreational drugs and schizophrenia do not mix well, even if the use is attempted self-medicating.
Such a beautiful man! Was his striking picture that actually made me stop scrolling vids to watch. You can see the depth in his eyes. So articulate and seems like a kind soul.
my brother was just like this. once brilliant and highly intelligent. He's gone now. street drugs took him out, and it was tough on everyone. This man brought back so many memories. RIP Truth.
That was one hell of a story and glimpse into the mind of a schizophrenic.. he seems like a good dude too, that’s tragic he’s been saddled with this disease.
Sadly, that s good choice of words. They are indeed saddled with these mental diseases and very hard to break free. Not their fault whatsoever but yet they are looked down on as beneath us or society that it’s became currently. I wish there was something I could do to help this man!
And a drug habit…
He has drug induced Psychosis .. Hes being doing hard drugs for quite some time . Like he said he deserved a 'hit' This should of been titled drug induced Psychosis .
What triggers a person to develop this? He mentions it just happened suddenly. That's terrifying to think it can happen to anyone.
Genetics, environnement
Schizophrenia has always intrigued me. I have an uncle who has schizophrenia. I’ve seen him do some impressive, very odd and sometimes explosive things. My uncle is one of the reasons I chose to go in the mental health field.
What caused it? When did it start? Randomly in adulthood or did he always have it
@@WizzlyBearW0rms It started in adulthood but I don’t know what caused it.
Compassionate person ❤️
@HypeManMike listen to what Jerry Marzinsky has to say about patients he has dealt with.
are we the same person? everything you wrote is something i could have easily written.
Can’t imagine the struggles he goes through on a daily basis. I wish him the absolute best ❤
I was thinking the same thing - this poor guy has so much stacked against him. There s a really nice guy stuck behind the mental issues.
My son's schizophrenia got triggered by him experimenting with recreational weed while hanging out with friends. It's been an incredibly difficult journey for our family. He is 22. It began at 19/20. He refuses to stay on his medication. I am a single mother, and the constant stress I feel daily, dealing with his behavior has been deteriorating my health. God help all these men and women who struggle with this condition, and those who love them.
I live similar .. my son is 19 with this illness. I completely understand ❤
You are not alone. My son's started at 17, we are 6 years in now. Will not stay on medication. We have to be constantly on guard. He ends up in jail at least once a year if he's been off medication too long...there's very little help out there.
I've had schizophrenia for the past 12 years. Medicine makes it worse for me. Meditating and remaining calm in stressful situation helps a lot. Only your son knows how to control it. Let him.
I got my masters degree and am working as a software engineer all while with schizophrenia.
And I feel like I also must jump in. I have twins that are 21. My son has mild autism and had reactions to his vaccines. My daughter has anxiety and depression and has been using marijuana since college. Their father has schizoaffective bipolar, and there is a long history of schizophrenia/delusional, behavior, and alcoholism from his brother (my kids uncle), father ( my kids grandfather) and on back several generations. Just the thought of my daughter using marijuana recreationally makes me incredibly worried for her. My son is against all sorts of drugs and alcohol, which is great because he is predisposed to having issues with things. But yes, I am a hodgepodge of auto immune issues and related stress induced conditions. I feel you.
@@mohsinkhalid2375my father had schizophrenia. He struggled terribly. He was extremely intelligent.
my mom had this condition unfortunately she passed in my mid childhood. i wish everyone with this good luck you guys can get going great i’m helping my friend with this. My prayers for you all. You guys are fighters
As others have previously stated, this interview is so educational.
Thank you Chris for being so candid.
The frustrating part is having better understanding and still not being able to do anything to help.
Mark I really appreciate you helping all of understand a little better. These insights are incredible.
_Thumbs up._ Candid, frustrating, unable to help.
Imagine being ill, thinking ten people are assaulting a child in a house, setting the trash can on fire, - the New Year party-goers come out and extinguish the fire by peeing on it.
This guy gets prison and banned from a city. I do not know which is more atrocious, the ‘legal’/ courts system or the medical/ mental health infrastructure.
Cosby spent around the same time locked up as Chris, and _America’s Dad_ was not attempting to save no girl.
Seriously, this is gold, I know exactly what he's on about as I've experienced very similar things during my deepest psychotic breaks due to schizophrenia. There's a primal bit in us all trying to make sense of the chaotic modern world. I felt 'walking the road' too. We face death there, going out in the pitch black to find out. Being both God and the devil and the persecution we experience as schizophrenics is simply Hellish. We find ourselves in a very real purgatory. He'll know of the time dilation and the sheer impossibility of ever making true sense or structure out of these worlds, the frustration.
Thank you so much for these stories of hope, I very much wish this guy gets into recovery and can begin to heal with medicinal help.
There is a cure, The Tallman Paradigm
Oh the description. So true. I hope you're well now.
Very good post Ree™.
My father, my brother and I are schizophrenic with other co-morbid mental illnesses and we've also experienced similar things. When we've been in psychosis at different periods, there's quite a few tropes / themes /thought patterns/hallucinations that overlap...even though we are 3 individuals. Some of our experiences sound strikingly close to what Chris has described... especially the Magical Thinking.
Mental illness was rife on my Father's side with my Great-Grandparents, Grandparents, and his siblings exhibiting their own individual manifestations on a spectrum, not all schizophrenics though. In the past I preferred self medication (never stimulants though, always downers which I can't post about here) to anti-psychotics. I'm middle aged and still struggling with it, sometimes daily or sometimes when it comes in waves. I find any form of creativity and the Arts to be extremely helpful. I wonder how many programs integrate something like that. Anyways thanks for your post, I felt compelled to just type my experience out after watching Chris and reading some of the positive comments. Take Care.
@@SamaelAzazel131 Yo! Thank you so much for your reply, it is much appreciated.
I felt like commenting because the thing that we have is very rare and also often misunderstood. I was very lucky to find a path of medicinal help to alleviate the delusions I was experiencing. Really interesting to hear your symptoms and you say it ran in your family? For mine it was out of the blue.
It is heartening to see the support in the comments for Chris. Clearly there's a beautiful guy underneath all the meth and marijuana use. The rocking caused by meth is so surprising to me as where I live meth isn't a thing. Where would he be without it?
Thanks again for your inspirational words.
You made me tear up with your profound words.
This guy is intelligent and the disease is so sad. He understands what's going on completely. It's so weird and scary.
The fact that he seems intelligent to me starts to make me question myself. :)
You do such great work showing the world real stuff. AND explaining it. My heart breaks for him. He’s literally stuck between worlds. People with mental illness self medicate, at times. This is a very smart, kind individual , trying to do their best.
This guy is on a wavelength that we have yet to see with our human eyes. We need more support for these people
This guy is on AM while the rest of us are on FM
It's called meth.
Hope and pray❤ he snaps out of i
Wow, profound words.
Demons are real, that's the wavelength.
The smile and giggle from this guy! He radiates something really great yet the struggle he faces is immeasurable. So is life. Thanks Chris and Mark.
An update on, Chris, would be great.
The crystal helps
Nice Papadosio pic, funny they crossed my mind while watching this. Does make one wonder.
He did say he did drugs right before this interview, something which worsens the condition immensely
that might be because he just smoked crystal
I actually caught feelings for this young man. He's so eloquent and witty. Would love to hear more about his life.
Same, what a character, funny and intelligent. Would love to hang out with him, but most importantly I hope he gets another chance at life.
As a homeless survivor, and not actually referring myself here, I can tell you that you would be surprised to see the amount of people who are homeless and extremely intelligent.
He's cute isn't he 😘😍😊
He has those puppy dog eyes and of course, the hair is lit✌️😆👍🏻
and of course, addicted to crystal, sex in back alleys, and gonorrhea is just adorable.
The bit about his soulmate being on the wind, and having to die over and over to eventually get back together is both insane and so incredibly romantic at the same time.
Used to see Chris on the streets in Panama City, FL, so it was crazy seeing him on RUclips!
Never saw him panhandle or bother anyone. Asked if we was hungry a few times and got him a pub sub (sub from Publix). He was delighted and thankful. Seemed like a good guy who’s just down on his luck.
Dude's not down on his luck he's got schizophrenia..
that's kool of U. pub sub's are the Bomb
The ethereal is real. He is just caught in between. Not at all a sick man he is just ahead of it. The frequency isn't in his mind, anymore than the bands in the radio. But he hears and sees questionable things to us because we are woven in the vain. He is like toto, seeing the wizard for what it is, while others still tremble to the smoke and mirrors. Human or effigy. Spirit or flesh. Or both. He's just not able to find the language to truly make sense to others. Just an observation allegedly lol
Poor guy I feel so much compassion for him, a girl in my hometown had Schizophrenia and everyone tried her bad I was the only one who talked to her with dignity, thanks to show this interview I hope more people feels compassion for this problem. He is a good man I wish him peace.
Nancy your a good person ❤
Thank you for being kind to her you've no idea how badly her soul needed it. May the Almighty bless you for your kindness in better ways
Seeming perfectly sensible while saying completely ridiculous things IS SCHIZOPHRENIA! This is a fascinating video that really shows what it's like to have this horrid illness. My son was diagnosed when he was 25, ten years ago. He doesn't communicate as well as Chris, has always been quiet but .... When he does reveal something about what's going on, he sounds very much like Chris, sounding reasonable while saying unreasonable things, like everything is opposite.
My son is almost symptom free now having battled this since 2016. There were 3 real life people talking to him every day. only one of which he knows personally. The other two are foreigners unlikely to speak his native language - but they speak it perfectly anyway. We were able to laugh at how absurd that is but still the voices kept speaking.
He is now somehow able to fend off the voices 'because he knows they lie all the time'. He cannot explain how he's got so much better in any other way.
He doesn't do drugs and never has. I believe sleep deprivation is what started it.
He's told me about cars talking to him In the street daily for the last 6 years but these have mostly gone now. He knows that cars talking like humans makes no sense but the symptoms are above logic. I don't think this illness can be cured with logic.
However during his illness he did his best to keep busy studying and refused to give up despite the voices demanding most of his attention. Although progress was extremely slow he passed the courses one by one. I believe this was key to his recovery.
@@setaroper2942i’m praying for you an your son in my heart i believe all things are spiritual, so i’ll b praying for you ❤
praying for a complete turnaround…… it’s possible god is able i’ve seen it ❤
thank you, i sense you are a decent person even if i don't know you@@numberone6266
God keeps telling me I'm satan reincarnated and I'm gonna spend an eternity in hell being tortured. You know how truly scary that is!?
Thank you for sharing Chris' story. He seems like such a nice guy and I'm sorry he's struggling. I pray there's a cure for this debilitating disease soon 😢
Chris seems like an articulate and sensitive man. I wish him well in his struggles.
I’m schizophrenic and medicated. In remission of any symptoms for years now. Live a normal life & a new mom. I have hope for him 🙏🏽. It’s not easy you feel like a guinea pig with Trial and error with getting the right cocktail of medication. But consistency is key. Stay on them even if you think your cured. God bless man 💕
My brother found the right medicine as well and is doing fantastic! It is definitely possible! Thank you for sharing this!
Why would you bring a child into this world, risking the possibility of them also having a mental disorder? My mother has serious mental problems, and passed them on to all her children. I've attempted suicide twice and will not fail again. I think it's very selfish. No logic in it at all.
Hi , I just wanted to ask , is there anyways you can help someone with schizophrenia when they are hearing voices , my bf has schizophrenia and I just wanted to know if there’s anything I can do . His schizophrenia mainly involves hearing voices and he is able to do normal day to day activities and stuff, but sometimes he hears things and I just want to know if there’s anything you think helps . Thank you
Praise Jesus!❤
Make sure you tell your baby daughter/son later on in life not to do any drugs at all since you have schizophrenia…even a 1 time use can trigger it.
Hey Chris, very brave to do this interview.. I know it was hard to do when your brain is in conflict ion. Know that meth contains many poisonous chemicals. As a CADC ( certified drug & alcohol counselor) for 20 years, and former user myself, I know meth can cause permanent psychosis. I’ve seen many meth addicts that are now in permanent psychosis due to meth induced chemical/brain .damage. I have some mild psychosis that I have to deal with on my own. Flashbacks . Living on the street leads to nowhere. Life is so short Chris. There are so many possibilities for you and you’re still so young. Sending you positive vibes. All you have to do is ask for help. ♥️💐♥️
@Jen 💜 I hope Chris reads your comment 💜
Very kind of you, but I’m afraid he won’t read this. Sadly
@@nhlibra thanks. Me too. ♥️♥️
@jen yes absolutely I call it the “aftermeth” because in many circumstances people don’t come back from their drug use
He seems like such a kind and genuine person who is just struggling and I feel sorry for him that his struggles progressed to the point that he ended up going to jail.
Man, my heart goes out to this guy. He seems so genuine and kind. Aware as he battles every minute, I cannot imagine. The strength he must have. Also, his theories and what he sees/hears would make an extremely interesting book or film.
This guy seems really sweet. My heart goes out to him.
Same thought. I feel that he is a good person.
The way how to speak that's why you think he's sweet
Ive known several people who have presumably drug induced schizophrenia and mostly weed being involved. I don’t have schizophrenia but I had to quit smoking weed because I was becoming insanely paranoid and it was actually frightening. I don’t trust my mind on psychedelics. I’d argue schizophrenia is probably the worst mental illness to live with
It’s considered the the most severe MI
Anorexia has a higher fatality rate
Man this sounds like my son. He was just diagnosed. Lord grant me the strength to keep going and keep him healthy.
When he said that he had a woman in another dimension that was his soul mate and they had to keep on dying so they could be together again. I almost cried. That hit me hard for some reason. This is one of my top interviews from Mark. I hope Chris is ok.
Chris needs to write a sci fi novel!! i was intrigued by everything he said
A lot of what he says sounds like the plot of the anime/manga The Seven Deadly Sins. It involves a couple, one angel and one demon. They are cursed as punishment for their betrayl and he lives forever/is a god and she is mortal and dies in front of him repeatedly. Every time she dies she is reborn and he continually seeks her out for centuries every time and the cycle repeats.
Not sure if Chris was inspired by this but either way its definitely interesting.
That was the coolest thing I ever heard 😂
@@jafulton89this is literally the plot to the anime and game called Amnesia. You should check it out!
Schizophrenia is such a painful disease, for the person and their loved ones. My ex husband developed schizophrenia three months after we got married. We were together for 5 years, I had no idea how he became unwell. I only found out once he was severely unwell that he was smoking pot and heaps of it. The day he became unwell was the worst day of my life… months in hospital, months of him hallucinating I’m the devil and finally trying to hurt me… I saw my best friend, love and husband turn into a sick monster. He became absolutely obsessed with religion and constantly was fighting strangers and trying to hurt me. His disease took 11 years of my life and his entire life. I’ll never ever ever understand it and I truely wish family members and sufferers peace. What a difficult disease to suffer. Thank you for your interview ❤
Wow, thanks for sharing that. My son is Schizoaffective and I’m a recovering addict. I’m impressed you stuck in there and did what you could ❤
Again, we call it a disease, It might not be a disease. It might be true. And we dont know about it.
How did it start? I’m going through the same with my bf of 6 years
Sorry to hear that I hope you are ok
Did you stay or left him?
i have schizophrenia and watching this was very helpful for me. i listen to the delusions of others and they sound so stupid. it makes me feel like mine are just as crazy and dumb! it makes it easier to ignore them
How are you?
mine is impairing in choise and disability to believe in anything.
I feel like the questions could have been much better, and the interview seemed condescending. Chris is bright, honest, and more self aware than most sane people. A bit disappointed with this one.
"this woman ive been talking to . shes my soulmate but she lives in a different world, so we have to keep dying and coming back to life just so we can be together "
that hit me hard
He’s very well aware of what’s going on with him and that is so fascinating!
Yes, and as soon as I heard the car horn it was like someone said something to him that only he could hear. I hope only the best for him...seems like a genuinely good guy.
Chris is able to clue us in to this condition. Keep up the fight Brother.
The way he describes certain drug use filling up a mental pool that eventually spills over is VERY interesting to me. I'm a healthy person but I when I was younger I was quite the psychonaut. I did a lot of psilocybin and lsd for many years coupled with a lot of meditation, kundalini yoga, chronic marijuana use, and even some Thelemic ceremonial magick. I got to a point where I was starting to break down and was experiencing awful psychosis when I wasn't using. And I remember that it felt a lot like Chris describes here in this video. I remember I had a discussion about it with a close friend: we both agreed that taking these drugs and doing these "spiritual" practices does what we described as "filling up your dinner plate". It's as if your psyche has a plate that holds information and can only contain so much. And you MUST eat what's on your plate. And the more drugs or experiences you have, the more you put on your plate. And if you overdo it, you can't keep up with it. It takes time to digest all this information you're exposing yourself to. It's been many years since I've taken any drugs or practiced any form of "magick" and I still feel as if I'm digesting (processing) those experiences. I like how he describes it as a pool spilling over which then triggers the psychosis. That's exactly what it feels like. The human mind is fascinating.
The magick side leads to madness, because that's where chaos resides. Reality is really chaotic and the more drugs you take, the more you see the spectrum of bizarre quantum events.
We're not built to live there.
This is also called opening yourself up to demonic spirts, the Bible warms of such things. The Hebrew word for witchcraft is Pharmakeia, also ancient Greek φαρμακεία (pharmakeía, “the use of drugs”), from φάρμακον (phármakon, “a drug, charm, enchantment”). it also talks about sorcery and necromancy as "the use of power gained from the assistance or control of evil spirits especially for divining : necromancy."
Thats an interesting way to put it. Related to the psyches ability to process the wild change in your entire reality. I think i could eat a dump truck.
I had pretty much the exact same thing you described and totally agree
Do what thou wilt! Haha
A friend of mine takes a medicine called Clozapine & he is literally 99% back to normal - no more voices.
I hope this fellow finds his answer & all others with this affliction