Jillian Turecki On Why Dating Apps Don't Work & How to Build a Relationship that Lasts

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  • Опубликовано: 21 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 96

  • @andreea1352
    @andreea1352 Год назад +77

    The problem is when you’re being honest and the other person is not ..people lie and take advantage from someone who is honest and kind😢

    • @dasshrs
      @dasshrs Год назад +12

      I put it in this way:
      -Be honest and open with any person. But when you see evidence of lie or being taken advantage act accordinly
      That makes you honest but also a person who respect yourself and see your value.

    • @Jordan_thebarber01
      @Jordan_thebarber01 Год назад +1

      Many scammers 😢

    • @amygalvin1799
      @amygalvin1799 11 месяцев назад

      On and off apps.

    • @jessicahitchens6926
      @jessicahitchens6926 7 месяцев назад +1

      It's called discernment. You don't be fully honest with men especially online. Women need to really cop on.

    • @Junevalentino
      @Junevalentino 6 месяцев назад +1

      That’s why you need to vet and have discernment while looking for a potential husband.

  • @FearfullyandWonderfullyMade139
    @FearfullyandWonderfullyMade139 Год назад +50

    As a woman, the older you get the harder it is to date. It's better to walk in purpose and learn to be happy by yourself. Not everyone was meant to be in a relationship.

    • @Jay_Lo
      @Jay_Lo Год назад +16

      This is your own limiting belief that has become solidified as your personal truth. You can change this if you want though.

    • @FearfullyandWonderfullyMade139
      @FearfullyandWonderfullyMade139 Год назад +2

      @@Jay_Lo I'm Christian. 😊 and 45. 😅.

    • @m.g5796
      @m.g5796 Год назад

      @@FearfullyandWonderfullyMade139 may i ask yiu why being a Chirstian is limitng to find a real relationship, i think Jay is totally right and I am 46

    • @sherriflemming3218
      @sherriflemming3218 Год назад +8

      Older women are more experienced. They're harder to manipulate.

    • @David-vt9hr
      @David-vt9hr Год назад +6

      As a man I agree

  • @Some_kind_of_wonderfü
    @Some_kind_of_wonderfü Год назад +11

    Jillian is the best! She has such a delicate yet impactful way of delivering such great content.

  • @MsWorldMine
    @MsWorldMine Год назад +12

    I don't know any of you but I stumbled here and it's a beautiful, deep and polite conversation. Loved it.

  • @LaiYunLuk
    @LaiYunLuk 9 месяцев назад +5

    Love that, the pedastol syndrome and the fallen hero. Been there and I fully understand it. Friends first, focus on developing a genuine relationship that last with respect and authencity. ❤

  • @nin9249
    @nin9249 7 месяцев назад +2

    I think the key with being single is to not do anything which will make it hard for you to let go if they want to end it

  • @Mzldy1shari
    @Mzldy1shari Год назад +18

    This video definitely resonates with me. I have just been thinking in the last few days that I’m getting off dating sites.

    • @dougbopst1
      @dougbopst1  Год назад +1

      Really glad to hear that this resonated with you. What was your biggest takeaway?

  • @livinglegend629
    @livinglegend629 Год назад +10

    The craziest part to me was at the beginning where she mentioned that younger women have problems with self esteem and chase the love from the other person. I guess I’ve never been that valued because I’ve never seen that before, if anything I mostly come across women who act like they’re doing me a favor.

  • @myaalberto2959
    @myaalberto2959 8 месяцев назад +1

    She is sooo amazing & on point with her deep dive perspectives!!!

  • @Leila2023_
    @Leila2023_ Год назад +4

    it is possible to get over an ex and still find them attractive. being at peace with it all is the key. we cannot control who rejects us. if we can be ok with it and move on emotionally then we are over it...

  • @nocturnalreptilian
    @nocturnalreptilian 8 месяцев назад +1

    The dating app portion was particularly helpful for me. Thank you!

  • @namnami3187
    @namnami3187 6 месяцев назад +1

    I think her advice on joining a community is really valid I started salsa and met with a couple of people❤ Even joining to a dance class art class or any kind of sports could actually give your life a meaning

  • @the1theonlypablo
    @the1theonlypablo Год назад +4

    Really awesome interview dude. Lots of great info from Jillian

  • @caroliner2029
    @caroliner2029 Месяц назад +3

    She mentioned coming off dating sites and meeting people in real life @37:03 mins.

  • @vkrgfan
    @vkrgfan Год назад +9

    I wouldn’t recommend a victim of sexual abuse to go on and have friendships with men.
    No that kind of trauma is difficult to heal, any man could be triggering to her and that feeling will re traumatize her.
    It takes long time for victims to develop trust again, it’s not as easy as you have described.

    • @Junevalentino
      @Junevalentino 6 месяцев назад

      Will you advise the same for men with women? Or women that been sa by women? Because that happens as well. SA is not a one gender crime.

    • @vkrgfan
      @vkrgfan 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@Junevalentino There are a lot of men that have experienced SA from other men. Unfortunately, statistically men are more likely to perpetuate SA than women, not saying that there aren’t women sexual predators it’s just more common among male population.

  • @sarokitas89
    @sarokitas89 5 месяцев назад

    Such an important and eye-opening discussion. Thank you!

  • @NicksterNOC
    @NicksterNOC Год назад +7

    27:45 I love being love bombed, it's incredible. I do not see how there could be a downside if it's months into a relationship.

    • @toomuchinformation
      @toomuchinformation Год назад

      Are you gay? If you are it makes a difference

    • @amygalvin1799
      @amygalvin1799 Год назад +8

      But it’s not real or about you. It’s a narcissists way into your life before they start disingenuous tactics. I think you might like when things are new with and a normal person is trying to impress you. 2 different things entirely.

  • @PS-xb9hc
    @PS-xb9hc Год назад +1

    This resonates so much! Thank you! So much clarity❤

  • @Botch_TV
    @Botch_TV 11 месяцев назад +1

    I myself have only dated once and that was when I was 14 and it was very abusive. I eventually was freed from that when my ex called me to introduce me to the guy she was cheating on me with the whole year we were together. I didn't date after that. I do get Jillian's point about developing that trust again with the gender that hurt you which I do agree to an extent but certain situations make it harder than others especially any kind of abuse. Not everyone is meant for a relationship and that's okay. Time is something you never get back so spend it wisely. If you're content with being single than be single. Nothing wrong with it, I think that's important to note as well.

  • @TheKanawa
    @TheKanawa 10 месяцев назад +6

    I was waiting for the part on « why dating apps don’t work » and didn’t find it. Is it just me?

    • @caroliner2029
      @caroliner2029 Месяц назад

      She mentioned it at 37:03 mins, and recommended meeting people in real life.

  • @Junevalentino
    @Junevalentino 6 месяцев назад +2

    Dating apps don’t work anymore, and will never work the way it used to in the past prior to monetization and subscription were added to it. Delete your dating apps fellas, it is a COMPLETE waste of time. Work on yourselves in every way and travel to countries that still respects and value families, marriages and men.

  • @carlaserra3438
    @carlaserra3438 Год назад +3

    Thank God for this podcast ❤

    • @dougbopst1
      @dougbopst1  Год назад

      Glad that you enjoyed it! What was your biggest takeaway?

  • @simhgamedev
    @simhgamedev 10 месяцев назад +1

    i use transistor technics - never made a mistake

  • @lindatucs2044
    @lindatucs2044 Год назад +1

    Thank you soooo. Chat ❤🎉

  • @Birdbandb
    @Birdbandb Год назад +1

    No more dating ever ever eveeeerrrr

  • @josephashenofsky8266
    @josephashenofsky8266 9 месяцев назад

    Really good

  • @jamescampbell4691
    @jamescampbell4691 Год назад +6

    Stopping alcohol and marijuana is a huge advantage for anyone ready to make that change. Resist Satan and if he doesn't flee, he will be revealed as the fool that he truly is.

  • @alaalfa8839
    @alaalfa8839 Год назад +2

    Maybe it's important to be "touchy" as a habit and initiated by a woman in an elegant way
    Touchy not in a sexual way but holding a hand and looking in the eyes of a man in a way
    "I understand your feelings at this moment
    just look in my eyes at tell me what bothers you at work." (I dont mean in serious situations but daily normal situations)
    Is this "touchy" emotional intimacy is ok...where the elegant woman is initiating some connection, with looking in eyes, in humble ways.
    Then. also, the sexual area is ok.
    mental sexual spiritual.
    It's simple.
    Did you notice that some people use such body language, that when you are going to tell them something, .....something obviously meaningless, or forgettable,
    but their body language is instantly very caring, almost like they look into your eyes with great care and almost like touching your arm
    I think some women with mother instincts do it with everybody partner daughter, and cousin or even a colleague. I dont know whether they are empaths or something.
    But maybe this kind of attitude is healthy in relationships of men and women, that they are not like "roommates" but be a couple.
    Maybe men dont seek the type of 90-60-90 trend and women don´t seek a man with a muscular body type.
    but the "touchy" type of woman who holds his arm and says lets tell me politely and humbly how was your day, what food makes you happy.. :)
    Let's go to nature for the trip and go camping, having fun.
    Men want someone who cares and has this mother instinct to share the love and "touchy" holding hand personality
    and women want someone to rely on, to feel safe and well.

  • @Vinyl_Dave
    @Vinyl_Dave Год назад

    60 years ago, was it Paul McCartney or John Lennon who said Money Can't Buy Me Love? (John said You Can't Do That on the other side!)

  • @LeonWhitton
    @LeonWhitton Год назад +1

    Great interview!

  • @vkrgfan
    @vkrgfan Год назад +5

    Nope therapy isn’t the rehashing old stuff at all.
    First and foremost it’s self improvement. You may want to work with a therapist specializing in trauma to help you get through it but that’s not something you do indefinitely.
    The goal of a therapist is to give you the tools needed to handle stress and unexpected traumatic events. It’s life, things happen that outside of our control. An honest therapist would want you to be free of negative feelings sooner than later, they wouldn’t want you to be their life long client.
    This is why you have to do research and see what qualifications that therapist have for if they don’t have at least a Masters in psychology CBT DBT training and Trauma informed training then I wouldn’t recommend trying them.

  • @elenibou.1297
    @elenibou.1297 Год назад +1

    It also happens in Europe and it is sad and pathetic too

  • @JoannaLight-kk3pq
    @JoannaLight-kk3pq 6 месяцев назад +2

    The Content doesn't match the title

  • @armenianchik
    @armenianchik 11 месяцев назад +1

    I was just dumped on Christmas Day over a text message. We did have a casual situationship. But he did admit he slept with 5 people since he was with me and he doesn’t like to wear a condom!

    • @marcustsenov853
      @marcustsenov853 10 месяцев назад

      This is how one night stands work

    • @robertjones2811
      @robertjones2811 9 месяцев назад

      A man who has sex with you before marriage will never marry you. You should give up sex until marriage. Someone who will marry you will never dump you for lack of sex.

    • @jessicahitchens6926
      @jessicahitchens6926 7 месяцев назад

      You found him on a dating app? Or online ? Its fast food you are a fix. Once you see it for what it is you won't be entering into these silly hook ups.

    • @armenianchik
      @armenianchik 7 месяцев назад

      @@jessicahitchens6926 dating apps. Which are mostly hookup sites.

  • @jankeizer407
    @jankeizer407 Год назад +1

    If you do the things you love you will meet the people who love the same as you do, and that makes a match optimally solid. So follow your heart blindly✨️🤲✨️

  • @juliaskagfjord6207
    @juliaskagfjord6207 11 месяцев назад

    35 mins in what is missing?

  • @immigrantamericannurse2714
    @immigrantamericannurse2714 23 дня назад

    One has to be aware of their age.

  • @createbje8627
    @createbje8627 Год назад +4

    Not true. I'm not sure if you ever lived in Europe.forst of all system in Europe is more deep, schooling, they are very mature in their 20s. In here, are spoiled think like brats still in 40s, and 50s

    • @cameronbell415
      @cameronbell415 10 месяцев назад

      I find the opposite. Also, men in most European countries are so feminine it's nauseating
      Unplanned teen pregnancy is also higher in Europe
      Btw European women cheat more than those in North America... doesn't seem very mature

    • @elsagrace3893
      @elsagrace3893 10 месяцев назад

      So true

  • @simhgamedev
    @simhgamedev 10 месяцев назад +1

    i started dating at 7 . brain function ? . of all my classmates i have been the far most successful,

  • @muraterkocevic9743
    @muraterkocevic9743 8 месяцев назад

    So much overthinking...

  • @yonitznkc
    @yonitznkc Год назад +1

    I’d like to date Jillian.

    • @kispumel
      @kispumel 11 месяцев назад

      I would not wnat to. Interesting, yes, however she is absolutely not being in feminine. Turnoff.

  • @hope4463
    @hope4463 10 месяцев назад

    Is it that men get tired of women so quickly. Do they want to replace the women they have with a younger one.

    • @robertjones2811
      @robertjones2811 9 месяцев назад

      No. It doesn’t work like that. Real men are naturally programmed to protect what they love. He won’t willingly give up what he loves. Female depression comes because they don’t feel loved. Male depression comes because they don’t feel respected.

  • @jessicahitchens6926
    @jessicahitchens6926 7 месяцев назад

    It's a business don't ever forget this. And a revolving door. Yes a small percentage might be very successful but I don't go on the minority. It also cheapens women and devalues them. Men don't really invest...

  • @kispumel
    @kispumel 11 месяцев назад

    Let me know if you have changed your mind. Very simple. Next!

  • @monikaleszko5343
    @monikaleszko5343 7 месяцев назад

    🎉🎉🎉

  • @svlagonda7417
    @svlagonda7417 9 месяцев назад +2

    She comes across as very highly strung, almost angry. I really wouldn't want to be in a relationship with her - she seems like she's on the verge of exploding at any minute.

    • @jessicahitchens6926
      @jessicahitchens6926 7 месяцев назад

      That's great she couldn't care less if you wanted to date her or not. She needs to put make up on doing a video like this. Be presentable..

  • @robertalust5466
    @robertalust5466 2 месяца назад

    I’m a femme lesbian
    Apps are my only option if I want to meet someone…b/c I don’t read as gay.
    I can meet men in real life, but that’s not what I want