Birth w/o pain meds
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 10 мар 2023
- Sign up for my Friday newsletter MDJ in Your (in)BOX! for a breakdown of the week's trending reproductive health news (and brief MDJ updates)! mailchi.mp/68d115710484/mdj-i...
FOLLOW ME ON SOCIAL:
Instagram: / mamadoctorjones
Twitter: / mamadoctorjones
TikTok: / mamadoctorjones
** The information in this video is intended to serve as educational information and is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information, contained in this video is for general information purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your own doctor/advanced practice provider. **
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
* designates links which are affiliates...
Ads and gifted items are clearly disclosed in videos and links.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
#birth #pregnancy #pain #medicine #health #shorts
Please don’t let the people in your life pressure you into having a medicated or unmedicated birth. They aren’t the ones experiencing your pain or pushing out your baby
Why? I did because ai didn't want to drug my baby.
@@christineperez7562 yeah and that was a great decision for you but everyone’s tolerance for pain is different and they have the right to choose for themselves if they want to do without someone pressuring them.
My mom for example was pressured into getting an epidural even though she said she was tolerating the pain just fine. I came out perfectly normal but still no one should be pushed towards either side!
@@christineperez7562 yes, you made that decision, others shouldn't be pressuring you into going one way or the other,
@@christineperez7562 yeah because so many babies have issues after epidural 🤨
@@christineperez7562 your baby isnt being drugged during an epidural. 🤦🏻♀️
I knew someone who wanted to have an unmedicated birth because her mama didn't have an epidural, and she was as strong as her mama. After several hours of pain, and her mama hating to see her like that just to live up to her example tells her "honey, the only reason i didn't have pain medication with you is because i couldn't afford it! It wasn't a power move, i just wasn't insured". 20 minutes later and she was feeling much better with a no-shame epidural in place.
Awww that mother is awesome 🥹
whaaaat.. America truly is something else. Poor mother.
@@esvck Americans only care about mothers while they're pregnant. The second the fetus is going out, neither the mother or the baby is worthy of any protection
What a shame as nation that would put women through it coz of insurance coverage BS. It's unbelievable. Even poor countries don't do this to women 😢
@@divyasasidharan2960 it was 45 years ago, so not really a comment on the current healthcare system, but I take your point
I am terrified of needles. I did do all the prerequisites required by my hospital just incase and was well aware of the "cut off point" when I could no longer get one, but did not feel I had to have one with either of my children. I do not regret it. My friends all had much more comfortable labors and I feel they also made the right choice. They were not smarter and I was not tougher. We all ended up with babies in the end, so mission accomplished.
Me too! But it was really not to bad. I am an easy birther.
Healthy way of looking at it.
Me too! I am more afraid of needles than the pain of childbirth so I’ve had two unmedicated broths
oh yeah an epidural would be hell for u than. i had one of them at 7 (no i wasn’t pregnant just became chronically ill 😭) it makes me feel so much more ballsy to what i’ve been through when grown ahh people can’t willingly do what i didn’t have a choice for as a wee little child 💀
Queue the mission impossible music
"I would die!" XD This is probably my favorite sentence of this short. My mom told me a horror story of experiencing paralysis from the epidural she received when she went into labor with me. She said the person who did her procedure did it wrong. She recovered after a few weeks. When I got pregnant with my first, I remembered this story and was terrified of getting an epidural because of her experience. So many people told me I was going to cave and get one anyways. When I finally went into labor, I knew nothing about how to manage my pain. My back labor was so bad that the nurses could hear me screaming down the hall with my door and their door closed. I finally caved and I felt so defeated and terrified. The anesthesiologist was a God, though, and walked me through everything. Gave me all the reassurance I needed to get through the procedure. I literally felt nothing after that. Not even the ring of fire as my daughter came out. I was so thankful to that nurse for talking me into it after that. That L & D staff was amazing!
Same here. I was against getting an epidural but my boy was posterior and he never turned to the right position. No breaks from back pain just more excruciating pain during the contractions. I lasted 14 hours of contractions 5 minutes apart and opened only 5 cm. I was so exhausted and in so much pain that I decided to have an epidural. The labour lasted 28 hours, I haven't slept in total for almost 2 days. It wasn't an easy ride from that point including 4 hours of pushing and stopping and starting the epidural to help me push. I'm just hoping that it will be easier with my second. No birth is the same, sometimes the epidural is needed.
I had almost the same birth experience with my first as @theiceandsnow3998, my 2nd, 3rd, 5th, and 6th were all homebirths. It's never easy, but they are all different, never had back labor again, thank god!
@@theiceandsnow3998I hope it goes better for you the second time. It usually does. Your body seems to know what to do better the second time around.
Thank you. It was :) my second son was kind of half posterior and I experienced back labour again but this time he turn when it was time for him to get out. There were also breaks between contractions which felt like a luxury.
I know someone that had a botched epidural - is there any way to like know whether it will go well? She now has chronic pain from nerve damage, I don't want that to happen to me, but am terrified of giving birth without it.
So many people pressured me not to have an epidural. After 12 hours of miserable pain I got one, and I'm so happy I did. I had the perfect epidural, I was able to feel just not hurt.
Hey me too, my labor was 27 hours, and halfway in I still wasn't dilating. I said well f this, I'm literally going through this for nothing because my son doesn't wanna come out😂 and finally when I did get to push, that was like 5 hours alone. So yeah I'm glad I got the epidural, I would've been able to do it without and I know that. But why lay there starving and in pain for so long🤣 I wish I was a 2 hour kind of girl like my best friend was lmao
"I was able to feel not hurt"
Oh, you give me hope ❤️ My one problem with the epidural was that, to my knowledge, you feel nothing at all, and the idea of having my body do things my brain isn't aware of feels extremely disturbing to me. I'd rather have a c-section at that point. But if you do receive sensory feedback other than pain from that area of your body then it's all good 😁
(not that I'm pregnant or ever see myself getting pregnant in the future, but I don't dismiss the idea altogether)
My epidural had complications, I had a cerebrospinal fluid leak and a two-day headache from that, and it was still worth it.
I had a similar experience! I was induced and let me tell you those contractions are no joke! I got to 5cm and my support person was super flaky or else I probably could have made it further. But I'm so happy I got that epidural bc as it turns out my son was 9lbs and I definitely wouldn't have wanted to do that without it. I loved my epidural and once it came time to push I could feel the contractions and push without being in pain.
@@darkcreatureinadarkroom1617 not feeling anything is definitely not a given. I got an epi before my contractions were even super painful, took a nap, chilled, until baby was ready. I completely felt her moving down and felt something coming out. Called the Dr in he said yep you're ready to push, pushed her out in 2 pushes, felt everything without the pain. Didn't really tear. It was magical
The way we handle pain is something so profoundly personal, I don't understand pressuring, comparing or criticising people for their pain management choices. Especially in this day and age when we have a thousand management options that can suit each person's needs!
How right you are. I was hit so much as a child I learned to remove myself mentally from physical pain. Labor and child birth was very straightforward and managable to me because I had years of practice managing physical discomfort psychologically and emotionally. I did not scream or cry out, either, just like I was completely silent when my father beat me.
I guess there's a silver lining to my father's abuse, because it has helped me manage pain without drugs my entire life. For me, by seeing it that way, it takes away his power and gives it back to me.
I got shamed for wanting to go unmedicated... everyone keeps telling me "oh you just wait, you'll be crying for ALL the medicine when the time comes - you can't do it."
As if i didn't suffer a femoral fracture twice and never took any pain meds for that. I think i'll manage, Karen. 😂
(The first time the doc did not believe i was in pain because i was not screaming in pain, so no pain medication was prescribed. Only crutches. And so i pushed the pain away with self-suggestion.)
Omg yes, I completely agree
Some people seriously treat giving birth like it's a race. Like "Ha! I did better than you!" because they had less meds, or a faster delivery, or the opposite of "omg my birth was soooo difficult you had it easy so you don't even know what it can REALLY be like". Also, the people who are like "I only gained like 10 lbs during pregnancy haha it must be awful to gain as much as you did". I do that kind of comparing too and I'm trying so hard not to. I'm so glad everything I've seen in this comment section is so supportive :) people are sharing their experiences without framing their choices as better than others' and it's just so refreshing. A lot of media/discussion around motherhood is so toxic that I tend to avoid it and that's really a shame, it's so validating to talk to people with similar experiences.
Yeah like I have chronic foot pain so I'm very used to constant but kind of dull aches in my body.
I can't do sharp pain at all. I've been almost knocked to the ground by a papercut
I shook like a leaf from fear when I got my epidural but my 30 hours of unproductive labor would have broken me even worse. I had an emergency c section and was very glad I hadn’t laid in pain for 30 hours before that. The whole experience start to finish was traumatic personally.
That's what's tough for me though. I want an epidural but I assume not being able to move in labor will cause additional complications
My friend had a lot of scar tissue from endometriosis, which ultimately prevented a vaginal birth, despite hours and hours of trying. She too had a c-section, but she also had a lot of bruising from trying to deliver vaginally.
Just want to say that you’re not ‘a wuss’ for feeling pain. Everyone experiences pain differently, you do what’s best for you ❤
My mother really pushed me to do not get an epidural because she had 5 children without one. She made me feel like a failure when I told her I planned to get an epidural. Luckily my husband and nurses encouraged me to do what I wanted without guilt.
having kids doesnt mean you must endure such a pain when an injection will take it away!
One person's experience should never negate someone else's and make their experiences less valid.
And why on earth make people feel pain when they don't have to? We have science now!
Glad you had some supportive people with you ❤
Here's some perspective for her, and perhaps an analogy for future use. People used to have surgeries/procedures done without anesthesia. Obviously when ether was first used for medical purposes it was revolutionary. So if your mother is not willing to do without pain relief for any procedures, simply because people used to not have it, then she should be more compassionate.
@@The_other_jenny yup. If you thinks the miracle of childbirth should be without painkillers, that should extend to all life, so pills for headaches, nothing. Since it's supposed to be as nature intended or whatever the logic is supposed to be.
I have never felt euphoria in my life the way i did when my epidural kicked in with my first baby- absolute bliss. My second came too fast for epidural (born within 20mins of arriving at the hospital) and the pain was so horrific to the point of causing me nightmares in the weeks following. After having my second though my bff who had delivered 3 babies med free said to me “don’t you feeling like superwoman for not having the epidural?” NO! I felt like an idiot for not getting to the hospital sooner🥺
Literally why do people care whether other people get one or not, it’s not a fucking pain contest. Personally I don’t understand why anyone would WANT to be in fucking agony while popping out a baby. Then again I never want to experience pregnancy either so
Hell yeah we both experienced extreme nightmare inducing pain that we absolutely didnt have to! high five bro! (hospital arrivals not included)
The no pain med thing is such a weird flex but okay move to me lol. No one undergoes other huge things without pain relief. No one gets a colonoscopy awake. No one gets their wisdom teeth out with no novicane. Why the fuck should we give birth PUSH A LITERAL WATERMELON OUT OF A TINY HOLE without pain relief? Who started this idea that it’s better?!?
Omg. Horrific. Glad you're mostly ok.
Opioids are the greatest thing on planet earth and having Endometriosis literally feels like you felt with your second labor. I have felt that debilitating pain 3 weeks out of every month since age 12. I promise it hurts that bad, and meanwhile, the doctors act like it’s outrageous and “drug seeking” when I tell them I would literally be bedridden or dead by my own hand, if not for narcotic pain meds.
My mom has permanent damage from a bad epidural so it’s always good to way the pros and cons for yourself!
I would still have one because I feel that pain would be more traumatizing.
I'm in the exact same boat! My mother spent fifteen years telling me about how giving birth to me left her permanently in pain, and the terror of my sibling being born so sickly that they needed an emergency baptism, and is now stunned that I have no desire to give birth myself. If I ever, by some terrible turn of events, found myself pregnant and it was too late to do anything other than birth it, I would be numbing out as much as I possibly could, but I admire the hell out of anybody who gives birth... at all, really. It seems like a complete horrorshow and every part of it needs to be a personal, free and informed choice
My first birth was medicated and I hated it. My second was in the car (we didn’t quite make it to the hospital). My third was unmedicated because we got to the hospital a few minutes before birth. My fourth was a planned c-section because of a problem with the placenta. I cried because I couldn’t give birth my favorite way. My OB said she couldn’t understand that. Most of her patients said, drug me, cut me and get the baby out, and let’s get this over with. Something I can’t quite fathom.
As someone who wanted an epidural but “the anesthesiologist is in surgery and there’s no time, you’re going so fast”….the crushing horror of asking for and being told no was a LOT. Apparently first time Moms aren’t expected to deliver in 4 hours from start to finish. And before someone tells me how lucky I was to go that fast….it’s like compressing all the pain of a 16 hour labor and delivery into 4. With my next pregnancy, I walked into that hospital back first “Let’s do this. Yes now. I mean NOW”. My son came in 2.5 hours.
This is the same as my mum's story! She had my sister premature, in 4 hours, it was too late for an epidural! And then I came in 2.5 hours... she's an incredible woman, and so are you! I can't imagine how tough that would be, I'm scared that my babies are going to shoot out! 🙈
@@jessied3210 One thing it taught me is that I can endure almost anything. There’s some level of comfort knowing this. No matter the pain, the babies are worth every second.
That’s how my second was. I didn’t start feeling pain until 2 hours before he was born but wow it was more intense than my first. Let me put it this way, the doctor checked me when I arrived and I was 7 cm and literally 2 mins later I was 10 cm 😮
I had really quick labour too, and it impressed on me that "here's how to handle birth without meds" needs to be part of prenatal classes even if you are planning on getting an epidural. It's not always an option.
This was exactly me. It was awful.
I had two medication free births. No one is a wuss for having a birthing plan that they are most comfortable with! You’re still a bringer of life and are to be cherished!! 💜
Thank you for being so open minded! This is the kind of support I love to see between women. A lot of people feel very high and mighty when they do medication free and think they get to judge others. There needs to be more kindness and compassion for people's choices
I also had two births with no pain relief. Both of my babies were preterm, but you still feel the same pain. Obviously, with preemies, I didn’t need to worry about tearing but it’s rough just the same. I did try with my first pregnancy to get an epidural but they were not able to place it in the right area, so I had to go through the pain of getting one, but no relief from it. On my second pregnancy, all I wanted was some pain medication in my IV, but they wouldn’t give me any. I was on a triage floor being observed when my water broke and we had to do a mad dash down to the birthing floor. Both babies are doing great. My daughter was 4 pounds 6 ounces and my son was 5 pounds seven ounces. My daughter will be 26 and my son will be 19. Neither of them had any long term issues.
I think it should be up to the person that’s pregnant, not anyone else. No one else is delivering. Some people have higher pain tolerances than others. It doesn’t make someone less of a person cause they need pain relief. I only hope everyone has a safe delivery and a happy baby.
…………. You did it…… twice…..? What did your parents feed you? Nails and tacks for breakfast? Cause you’re pretty hardcore.
I’ve had 3 forced “false birth contractions” when they put my IUD in (apparently that can happen from irritation to the IUD)…… and I went into a panick attack so hard, my arms started CURLING IN ON THEMSELVES. It was THE. WORST. PAIN. I’ve ever felt in my whole life. It felt like being electrocuted, stabbed, and shot in the lower stomach- all at the same time. I had to hit the alarm button with my head cause I couldn’t use my arms…….
Those 3 fake contractions literally made me want to be unalive. So I SERIOUSLY MEAN THIS- that is some impressive sh!t. I would rather deep throat a shot gun- but hats off to you. You deserve a trophy (again- not a joke. Here, take this, it’s all I got. lol 🫴🏻🏆)
@@jmfong76 My above comment applies to you as well- You guys are made of something other than human material. Cause I don’t understand how you both didn’t just spontaneously combust. I would have lmfao
I think the message is for people who get pressured into having or not having medicated births and people who feel ashamed with their decision. She was saying it's your decision and to not let other people pressure you into making choices that you don't want/not for you. My mom had non-medicated births to me and my brother as well. She said it hurt so bad when she had me and my brother didnt hurt at all. I think if she had the choice, she would have chosen to be medicated for me and not for my brother. Having a pressure-free choice is always better than no choice.
I'm so glad you said this! My sister had hers medication free and bragged about it so much and I have been feeling pressure to do it that way even though I am also a big wuss lol thank you for validating my feelings
it is *your* birth and yours alone, not your sister's or anybody's. I assume the less pain for the mother is less stress on the baby.
If it helps, when I was pregnant the first time, I told myself that I'd decide in the moment. That way I wouldn't feel any shame or regret any way I chose. I ended up getting an epidural, because that crap is more pain than any human should have to endure. I did the second time too, and everything went very smoothly both times.
Honestly, I think that a lot of the arguments that women use to deny themselves pain management during L&D are rather facetious. Like the whole, "Women have been doing it for millenia. I can too." You know what else people didn't have for millenia? Clean water available to them 24/7. Are you hiking down to the river with a big clay pot on your head everyday? No? So why pick and choose which elements of modern conveniences and technologies are acceptable to your worldview?
everyone has different birth experiences you'll be alright mama, enjoy relaxing
But it's not her fault you felt pressured just because she was proud of herself.
@@johanna2690 You're right it's not her fault. It's my own fears and comfort level. I am proud of her, just not sure that's what I would want for myself.
My pressure around me was to be medicated. I am happy I listened to myself and did a unmedicated birth. I am a ACE 8 trauma survivor and have enough self awareness to know that being numb, having my movement restricted, and limited birthing positions would trigger me. Everyone needs to do what makes them feel safe. For some that is being medicated. Especially if it is the pain that scares them and makes them feel unsafe. With me and my trauma it was about not feeling trapped, having more options available, and a very small trusted team. Everyone’s choice needs to be respected.
I choose unmedicated each time for similar reasons. The important thing is to trust yourself!
This! My trauma is completely different but related to spinal needles so I knew that epidural administration would trigger me and i felt a lot safer to deliver unmedicated. My biggest fear was if I’d need a C-section and they would need to do spinal anesthesia for that.
Amen
Exactly why I did unmedicated twice. The loss of control of my body with an epidural and the loss of autonomy would have left me feeling violated. I would go through any amount of pain to avoid that feeling.
My mother told me she did her deliveries epidural free because she wanted to prove to my Biohazard that she was stronger than he thought she was and that she always regretted it because she was in too much pain to enjoy her birthing experience. She has since always impressed upon myself and my sisters to make our decisions for ourselves, not someone else.
Biohazard. 🤣 I love that alternative.
I am stealing biohazard, that is amazing
That’s exactly why I’m considering doing mine epidural free, my hubby loves me (and I him) but he thinks I’m weaksauce and I want to prove I’m not 😂
@@hannahedwards6479 Is giving birth not enough of a reason for him to not think you're a wuss?? Even with pain meds, birth is...an experience. If you want no meds, that's cool! But if you actually want the meds, please use that option. It doesn't make you a wuss for wanting to suffer less. 💜💜
@Hannah Edwards well, you do what you want - obviously... but that's exactly what the other commenter was advising against doing... take care of yourself and do what's best for you, he's never going to experience or fully understand the pain you will go through- medicated or not...
I’m a doula and the #1 thing I ask my clients who want an unmediated birth is “why is this important to you?”. Unmediated birth can be beautiful BUT it takes preparation.
Just like running a marathon, if you get up tomorrow and decide to run a marathon you might be able to do it but it’s probably going to be really hard vs. If you plan and prepare yourself mentally and physically ahead of time.
Absolutely terrified of needles, specifically terrified of epidurals since I learned what they were as a kid (my mom had her last kid when I was 12. ). And while the epidural was probably the weirdest sensation I have ever felt, and definitely one of the most uncomfortable, that part only last maybe 20 minutes top, and then I just hung out with my mom and husband until it was time to push, gave 3 good rounds of pushing, and LAUGHED my baby out.
If you are able to get an epidural, I highly recommend.
I chose to not get an epidural. There were several reasons. I never regretted not having one. I think it’s a personal choice and only you can decide what is right for you
My mother in law told me she was "so proud" of me for not taking Percocet after delivery and I was like "dont be, my dumb ass thought that was an anxiety medication and when my husband explained what it actually was I was too embarrassed to tell the nurse to come back".
Edit: holy jeez, I have never been scolded so much for something I didn't do. =\
Oh no! 🙁
Wtf is there to be proud of about that?
Why would you take Percocet? Honest to god, US, you REALLY have a problem with opioids.
@@9MsBrightside That problem is real, but do you actually think shaming someone for wanting effective pain meds in a traumatically painful situation is going to help fix it? OP didn't decide what medications the staff should offer them, ffs. Learn to raise discourse in a useful way instead of being hostile to victims of the system for no reason
Edit: I misunderstood their intentions and they understand why their wording seemed hostile, it's cool
@@ItsAsparageese it isn’t even offered after vaginal delivery in Canada at all. So it’s not that strange to question why it is offered after the delivery is over in the USA
I feel like we should talk about vaginal births vs c-sections the same way.
My mother had to have c-sections with all three of us (I have a younger sis and bro). Since I was the 1st born, she had to have an emergency one because her cervix wouldn’t open, and my umbilical wrapped around my neck which made my heart rate drop to 0.
My mother was really thankful she could deliver us all safely, and she was safe as well. However, I have heard other women ashamed or being shamed for having c-sections. It was like they felt they had failed as women or weren’t woman enough. Society already shames us enough for just existing, so it’s really sad to hear that shame goes into how a woman delivers her baby too. 😢
I'm glad you're alive. It's stupid that we shame people for wanting living babies.
@@tinkeramma Thanks. 🙂
I agree.
What people seriously criticize c section choices? Like dang just get the baby out whatever method, it doesn't matter as long as everyone is safe in the end!!!
People need to stop. You and your mom could have died. C-sections have saved so many lives and is considered a major surgery. Any body that can carry a baby at any capacity is a shero!
I’m glad you survived such a traumatic birth! Both of my births were c-sections, and altho I’ve never been shamed for having them, I do feel a little left out of the “vaginal birth club”. The focus is getting the baby to the outside as safely as possible tho. My babies were big and the dr told me it was fairly likely they’d have to dislocate my baby’s shoulder in order to get him out. I went straight to scheduling a section after I heard that. And-c-sections are no picnic either. There is significant recovery involved. Also, I wasn’t fully frozen for my second one. That was fun…
My ex mother in law pressured me to not get an epidural when I was having my oldest son. The nurse heard her and when the monster in law stepped out for a moment, the nurse told me I didn’t have to listen to her and she made her stay out until after I’d had him. I had my epidural and it went great!
My epidural experience was wonderful. I still recall looking up at my anesthesiologist & he had a white glow around him lol. I had only one child so im glad this is a great memory
Lol a white glow 😂Your brain was like, he’s a pain relieving angel!
You have the biggest, kindest eyes.They are so full of empathy and knowledge.
Definitely the kind of person you could trust without a second thought.
I agree. She’s a sweetheart
Her eyes are indeed large.
Big eyes don't make a person kind. How can you know if she actually understands the feelings and thoughts of others? Yes, she is knowledgeable because she studied a lot to get a medical degree AND she interacts with patients daily that provide a very wide range of circumstances that allow her to use her knowledge and sometimes ucoventuonally treat them. Empathy is not something you can tell by observing someone's big 🤪 eyes
I like that on every message your bottom line is "To Each Their Own". I just hope people start respective that more.
My motivation was "i want to see if I can do it" and "i want my baby and I to have the best outcome possible" My midwife was completely on board and I gave birth in a birth center (water birth!) attached to a hospital. Best of both worlds. I did it, and I had peace of mind that I could be whisked down the hall through some doors if it went south.
I knew from the moment I saw 2 lines on my pregnancy test that I would definitely get the epidural if it was possible. im so glad i did, because even WITH the pain relief, i was so tired i couldn't even hold my own legs to push
My friend had a baby in December and being a marathoner wanted to see how a medication-free birth stood compared to a bad marathon. 12 hours into labour, her husband suggested an epidural and she was like "what a great idea!" but something in her blood work had become a contraindication so all they could offer her then was gas. _16 hours later_, she and her massive baby were both completely fine, if a more than a bit tired, and she "would rather run a marathon every day than do it again" 😂
Her dumbass is gonna do it again. Calling it
I saw 16 hours and massive baby and my brain translated that to 16 pound baby. Hopefully it wasn't that massive.
@@katymvt gosh you made me laugh so hard! No, that’s more of a 3-4 month old.
@@pamhernandez6565 my friends baby was 13lbs at birth!! (Yikes!) and my baby was 14 lbs at her 1 year well check…every baby is so different! But yea I can’t imagine a 16lb baby at birth!!! (Or 13 for that matter ouch lol)
@Hurricane maybe her platelets were too low. It's happened to my patients, but it sucks when your pain management technique is unexpectedly different than what you thought it would be.
Many years ago, when natural childbirth first got popular, my GYN told me his wife had had 6 children without meds. He shook his head and said, "She's crazy."
I ❤️ your Dr 🤣
I’m confused. What do you mean, “first got popular”?
@@user-pt1cz4ot1e well i was confused for a bit because of course everyone had to have a natural childbirth process, without pain meds (prolly bc they didn't exist yet)
or maybe something about c-sections idk
but maybe popular meaning people deliberately chose not to get epidurals or anesthesia or pain meds or whatever
@@user-pt1cz4ot1e It speaks primarily with 1st world western countries where alternative/natural medicine became a fad and in places where epidurals were routine for childbirth. Most of thr world now and throughout history has natural births without epidurals but women in privilaged countries have recently also been opting for natural birth.
Yeah, having six kids is mental.
Done it both ways. I'm definitely not a big wuss but i have extreme back labor every time. 3 now amd pregnant again. I WILL be getting an epidural as long as time and health permits it. I find that I can experience the birth of my baby so much more when im not in agonizing pain. I can have them help me sit up a bit as my baby comes out so i can see it (as much as possible) and then instead of recuperating from the pain I can hold my new born baby on my chest and even do the first feeding. All while fully aware of whats going on. So for me it's a big YES on the epidural. ❤🎉
I feel much the same as you. I feel like the epidural allowed me to be present and more into the experience of birth, rather than just suffering through it. I was also able to enjoy that first beautiful moment with both my boys, while being largely unaware of all the work the midwife was doing in that moment. (Stitching, placenta delivery, etc.)
I can handle a lot of pain (though I do throw up) but before I got the epidural I only focused on the pain, it was the only thing that existed for me. Once I got the epidural I could focus on what was happening, be fully present in my son being born! It’s a modern miracle!
Everyone is different and my experience is not meant to shame anyone who had an epidural. I had the opposite experience to what was described in the video - my mother in law tried to pressure me into an epidural and told me I was going to have a really difficult delivery because I have fat legs, and I was stupid for not wanting one. I did my research and decided I didn't particularly want one but if I needed one in the end, then fair enough. My main reasoning was I didn't really want a catheter and I didn't like the idea of not being able to feel what was happening to my body properly. I ended up delivering both my babies very quickly, so there was no time for an epidural, and with just gas and air. I had 2 horrendous pregnancies and I genuinely found the labour experience very rewarding and cathartic so that was worth it for me to not have a medicated birth. I think everyone is different and I believe everyone should make an informed choice as to what to do with their body during childbirth and these videos are brilliant in providing that educational experience.
If MIL is still available, you should have a chat about this, and what made her think those comments were supportive?
Wtf is the connection between fat legs and painful birth? There's troll logic and there's this
Did you have a laughing gas? (Is that what you mean)
@@TheKrispyfort I'm going to bet that being supportive was not MIL's goal there.
@@ellenseltz4548 thus making it an even more important question to have MIL answer
My motivation for medication-free is that I feel very strongly that a hospital birth would make me extremely anxious so I am delivering at a birth center with CNMs instead. I am less afraid of pain than I am of the whole culture of hospitals. I did a semester of nursing school, too, and I hated the hospital so much that I left the medical sector altogether. There are just so many things that happen that aren't in the best interest of the patient. I knew I needed a more laid-back environment where childbirth wasn't treated as pathological.
My best friend really wanted a midwife birth, but she has a misshapen uterus and babygirl is breech with no chance of turning. She's scheduled for a c-section Monday. She's understandably anxious, but as someone who had a ROUGH first child birth with only my husband there for me, I'm happy that she has a great medical team and that they're doing the most safe option. ❤
@@blueeyedbatman I agree that there are definitely circumstances that make a hospital birth a necessity. I don't believe that normal pregnancy should be treated as a pathology, but abnormal pregnancy circumstances definitely warrant more medical intervention
@@sydney6268I didn’t know I would need a c section until after 10 hours of labor. Cord was wrapped and her heart rate was dropping.
@@blueeyedbatmanI had my first baby turned ..that was painful but worth it .
I had an epidural and am so glad I did. I knew my anxiety would be incredibly high during the whole process. I was able to sleep for a while while laboring which left me ready for pushing. I have no regrets around my daughter's birth.
I felt so defeated when I requested an epidural. However, my OB kindly reminded me that in a hospital setting, the only natural birth is done without make up 😅.
They were absolutely right- glad to hear you had a great doctor and that you were able to get the care you needed. All the best vibes to you!
@@bruhdudeguyman😂
Preach! Pain meds or lack thereof don't make you a better person or parent. We should all be supported in making our own choices about what goes in our bodies.
This is such an important message. I've read a lot of comments under artikels about epidural, that getting one does not make one a true parent. What kind of reasoning is that? If I take pai relief in the dentist office I am a bad parent? Of course not and labour is much more painful and much longer then a drilling of a cavity. These two do not compare on the pain scale, so if someone wants a pain relief, they shouldn't be judged for it.
Well said.
The "tiger stripes" mom shit I saw online in the 00s was so toxic. As though a woman is any less a mom if she wanted or needed modern medicine. Every mother is a mother. It doesn't matter how she got that way.
My initial "plan" was no epidural because I was TERRIFIED of the needle in my back. At 38 weeks, we found out my daughter was breech and everything went out the window on my fear. I had an epidural the next day for an unsuccessful ECV and then another epidural 9 days later for the C-section we scheduled because I was not going to risk going into labor while my daughter was breech. It was an amazing lesson from the universe that sometimes the plan you've had for almost a year has to be thrown out the window for real-time decision making. My ECV was the first time I ever had an IV, and the C-section was my first ever surgery. I was kind of forced to face some fears, but it was true, in my case, when they say having your baby at the end of it all makes it so much easier to process.
I had an external version done at just past 37 weeks
I don’t remember any pain medication.
I remember an IV with something to prevent contractions.
I remember that the actual procedure only lasted a few minutes, and the two OB doing it would not attempt the procedure for longer than some really short amount of time. Five minutes? Fifteen?
What I do remember, over 30 years later, is that I’d rather go through labor again than have another version. Though I am thankful that I did not have to have a cesarean delivery… as that would have dramatically changed my family story.
@Tanya Engesser I don't know how it was 30 years ago, but in 2021, they attempted to rotate her 3 times and kept monitoring our hearts. I'm sure the pain you experienced is why an epidural is standard for the procedure now. If they had given me the option not to have an epidural for the ECV, I probably would've taken that option because I had already been mentally preparing breathing through the pain of labor because the needle was so scary. In the end, my C-section was probably the best thing that could've happened for my recovery process because I was walking as soon as the epidural wore off and I'm not sure that would've been possible if I had been through labor 😅
It was a LOOOONG day of labor. I had 2 epidurals. Totally worth it.
I've done it both ways and can see both sides. Personally, my unmedicated births were much easier to recover from, and given the opportunity I always chose to try.
I LOVE my medicated birth. I was in such high spirits. Amazing memory. Amazing. I was on cloud 9 and had the PERFECT most handsome baby. I was in heaven 10/10
I'm usually of the opinion that we shouldn't take medication for every minor inconvenience like slight headaches or light fevers etc because usually there's a reason for those and we shouldn't just "mute" them. But when my genitals are about to rip open then yes please give me all the medication lol
Just curious but why do you think someone should have to suffer with a headache if they have to work or do anything else where the headache will make it more difficult? What reason is there for a headache not to be "muted"? A fever makes sense as it has a purpose (to kill whatever bad stuff is making you sick), but I don't think headaches do.
For example, I ALWAYS get hormonal headaches the week leading up to my period. I know what's causing them, but there's no benefit to having them either. Hormonal headaches don't have a positive effect on the body, and normal pain meds don't touch them. I usually have to use THC, which I obviously can't do when at work. The headaches impact my production. Sorry, but I don't think handling symptoms to function better is a problem. I'm now trying out taking my birth control pills continuously (no 1 week break) in order to prevent these headaches because of how much they impact my quality of life for that week every month. Is that also considered "muting" my symptoms?
@@triforce_majora For one it's just a personal choice I made for myself, I have no problem with other people doing it. And my problem is more with just taking medicine against any symptoms and ignoring possible reasons. But if you already know the reason of the symptoms and there is no treatment than to treat the symptoms, I would take medication too. I have the luck of not having any chronic pains yet, so that isn't something I had to think about. Pains are usually your body telling you something is wrong and you should know what's wrong before shutting down the communication.
@@naomif9964 I'm the same way. If I for sure know where the pain is coming from (like PMS) then I'll take light meds to take the edge off. Otherwise I do like to *feel* the pain to make sure it's not getting worse throughout the day. If it's really bad then I'll knock a few stronger pills back to see if that gets me through a good night's sleep. Only if it persists when I wake will I go in haha.
Personally my medication free home birth was way less painful then my migraines. Also our genitals are made to give birth, so it is not necessarily ‘ripping’ open (and also, an epidural is given for the management of contractions instead of the pushing your baby out fase). However, there is nothing better about medication free versus all the drugs in the world. Every birth is birth, it is all amazing that we are capable of this, there is nothing impressive about going medication free. It is just a choice.
@@triforce_majora I generally dont like taking pain medicine, but I take one pill as an occasional preventative for minor headaches because I sometimes get headaches (probably stress/sinus headaches) that will either stay for hours or progress to migraine level if I try to toughen it out. I've learned to strike a balance and take 1 pill for when it is minor and take one or two more if it doesnt go away. Thankfully, I have not had cases where I have gone overboard on pills. There has been times though where I let a coworker take some advil from a small bottle I brought with me and was horrified that their first instinct was to take more than directed. I felt like an addict just taking my one pill lol.
I’m absolutely terrified of getting an epidural or really having to have an IV in my arm through the whole process. I also have a deep connection with my body and am more comfortable without medication. It’s a plus for me because I’ll be able to labor and deliver in any position I feel most comfortable, without being limited. It’s worth it to me. I’m currently being pressured by all my female relatives to get an epidural before I feel any real pain. I think it’s ridiculous. They all say I should have a fear of that pain instilled in me before the time comes. Ridiculous.
I think being very aware of your body is a huge positive if you plan on doing a medication free birth. Make sure to practice relaxing different parts of your body, especially during times of distraction or stress. A majority of the pain comes from muscles contracting that don't need to contract. If you can relax those muscles while your uterus contracts, you will need able to tolerate the pain very well until transition. And once transition hits and you think oh no I can't do this, you just tell yourself it's almost over.
I had 5 unmedicated births because I know my body and was pretty sure an epidural would not work for me because of my health conditions. It's an amazing experience if you are prepared and practice and have a deep understanding of the body processes during labor and delivery so you can work with your body and not against it.
Oh and fear=pain so practice releasing fear and positive thinking is a hugely helpful skill.
I loved having an epidural. I was afraid of getting one and the lovely nurse reassured me that it would be okay. I'm glad she did because it made giving birth so much easier for me. Not to mention that I had a third-degree tear so that epidural really came in handy when I was getting stitched up!
If only ALL doctors were like this--truly supportive of their patients!--everyone could have an amazing, empowering birth story ❤️
Can you do a video on all the pros and cons of an epidural?
Yes please!! I absolutely understand if someone wants to get one but I think the risks are way too minimized for anyone to be making an educated decision. I know when I was 18 and got one, I wasn't made aware of any of the risks. This is going to sound crazy, but 1 epidural destroyed my entire family and it's maddening to see drs act like they're so safe. We all already know that pain relief is great, but why don't we ever talk about the other side of it?
@@pocasanchez yep, my aunt got nerve damage after an epidural, it's not common but it definitely does happen. People can decide what they want to do, but having been through pregnancy myself (in Australia though, I'd say the hospital care for pregnant women is objectively better here) the risks of an epidural were pretty well explained to me in the pre natal care phase. In fact all pain relief options aside from epidural were explained in detail with pros and cons so we are well informed about what we can ask for while in labour at the hospital. We even get a whole book which has it all in writing with detail about what to expect for the whole birth and then aftercare. Don't know about the states, but at least where I am there is a tonne of info provided.
Pros, pain is lessened or non existant, can be reapplied if it fades, can help with energy or concentration, you wont feel if you tear, can help with blood pressure.
Cons, youll need a catheter, you wont feel if you start to tear (it might unavoidable, but sometimes you need to slow progression a tiny bit and you may avoid a tear), it may not work fully, giving you an exasperating level of pain in one part of your body but not another, it has a few possible negative side effects.
@@pocasanchez If you don't mind me asking, how did the epidural destroy your entire family? That sounds really terrible, but it's also very general and I don't really understand what you mean happened.
@@bendakstarkiller3407 Where are you saying that Australia's prenatal care is better than, or are you saying it's the best in the world?
That does sound good, especially a book sounds really helpful, so you can look through it in your own time and also look at it with family/friends.
I was scared more of the epidural than the natural birth! I did natural 2x. I'm not scared of needles, but that huge epidural needle and then having the catheter in my spine YIKES for me
I had my first with no pain meds just breathing and meditation. It was wonderful. My next 2 were stuck and after hours of pushing the docs had to do a c-section. “If that’s what you gotta do, I’m getting hungry” was my main thought and I took the epidural
(They wouldn’t let me push too long with the VBAC though)
I had two home births. Mostly because I had spent a lot of time in the hospital as a kid, and I associated hospitals with feeling sick and weak. I didn’t want to begin motherhood feeling that way. I was blessed and lucky that both of my births were uncomplicated. Giving birth without medication made me feel like I could do ANYTHING. I had a renewed trust in my body, and my kids’ birthdays were the best days of my life. That said, anyone wanting pain relief should have it! There’s no wrong way of doing it, births are like snowflakes.
Same! Giving birth was so rewarding and empowering for me. Despite having an episotomy without pain meds for my first, I still wouldn't have changed it for the world. I'd totally have ten kids if it didn't mean ten pregnancies, as I HATED being pregnant. 😂
I didn't have an epidural, and a large part was the worry of the consequences of it not going right. I was much more confident in my ability to learn how to cope with the pain than someone sticking a needle in me, and it not working or partially working. I also didn't want to be stuck in a bed and be able to feel when I needed to push.
That being said, I don't judge anyone for getting it or think I'm better than anyone because of my choice. I had friends who had done it before me, so I had some examples. Would definitely do it again.
My feelings exactly!! Three babies no epidurals, no regrets. Everyone has to do what’s right for them 😊
Same!
I've had both my aunt and mum go through bad experiences with spinal leaks and nervous system issues/sensory nerve pain due to epidurals that I'm not considering it an option, but I don't lord it over others because pain management is so relative. I've lived with managing pain throughout my life due to bone development issues that I feel the same about coping and understanding my pain management.
That’s exactly why I don’t get epidurals. Too many horror stories of people living with constant pain after the temporary relief during childbirth. I was terrified of a giant needle being placed incorrectly into my spine.
Four unmedicated births so far, and expecting another one in July. They’ve all gotten easier since the first one, which isn’t hard to do because the first one was with pitocin and back labor.
@Rosanna I had back labor too, and omg, was that awful in the end. I took so many showers.
This is exactly why I’m going to try going the no epidural route!
I asked for it because I wanted to sleep. Labor lasted a long time and I was tired. Once I woke up I told them to turn it off/take it out. My husband was like 😮 and apparently knew from my face that I was serious. That nap helped me have the energy to push which was the best feeling after having back labor. Have the labor/birth that's best/healthiest for you.
As a doctor, I say, GIVE ME THE ANESTHESIA!!!!!!!
I was going pain med free my first labor and then after 14 hours of back labor I got an epidural and never even thought about going med free for my other deliveries.
What you do in those few hours (or few more hours) doesn’t define you. I’ve seen so many people melt down because of things not going according to plan. This does not define you. ❤️
I really wanted a med-free birth with my son but my labor wasn’t progressing fast enough so the doctor pressured me into getting pitocin. I still stuck it out for 12 hours before I couldn’t take it anymore and got the epidural. It was a truly horrible experience to the point that for the first few hours after birth, I was so resentful of my baby- I wouldn’t hold him. I made my husband and my mom hold him instead. We’re good now, he’s the light of my life but I never want to repeat that.
Hugs and understanding
When I was in labor with my second child we could hear screaming, almost primal, and I was halfway convinced someone was being brutally attacked. Turned out the woman in the next room was labouring without pain relief.
More power to her, but I was very glad to have an epidural.
I had a pain free, and pain med free birth with my second! Every birth is different, totally unique. Its very much a you do you boo situation from where I stand ❤
My best friend had an unmedicated birth because the anxiety of not being able to move freely due to the epidural was worse than the pain of the labor.
Wow.
I recognise this amount of pre-existing trauma.
Hugs and understanding to your Bestie
Im pregnant and thinking of getting epidural.. what do you mean of not being able to move freely? is it a long term type of a thing or just when you go to labor?
I was said no to do it too..Im 15 weeks preggo and thinks alot now from birthing to breastfeeding and the post partum and its just too overwhelming..Im worried I cant even be a good mom one day 😭
@@ferrero8575 once its in place you are in bed; most people have no lasting issues
@@ferrero8575 you can for sure move about. I was unable to do anything but lie in bed due to the pain, but after the epidural, I could walk, and was dancing around, trying to move my hips, and help my baby and body along. I was also able to eat and get renewed energy, and the birth progressed so much better after the epidural.
When I was pregnant, my biggest challenge was overcoming my fear. I was terrified of the pain of vaginal delivery. But I had several negative experiences with my primary care doctor that left me equally scared of hospitals. (It's common sense, but no one ever taught me or encouraged me to find a different primary care doctor).
Ultimately, I chose a birthing center with certified nurse midwives. It was conveniently next door to a hospital.
I figured the nurse midwives would be able to help me cope with the pain of a vaginal delivery, and if anything went wrong, the hospital was just next door.
I don't regret my birthing experience. It worked out for me.
But I do regret allowing one primary care doctor to tarnish my feelings for all medical providers. I just didn't know that good ones are out there.
No matter what birthing experience you want, fear is always going to be an obstacle. We need to do better at teaching our kids how to find doctors they can trust to genuinely care for them. I had to figure that out on my own, and it took way too long.
My 72y/o at the time of my first baby, gyno, looked at me after I expressed that I thought my MIL would think less of me for wanting pain relief and plainly said.... " I don't give out gold stars or special pats on the back to those who choose to forgo pain relief... I only care that we have happy, healthy babies and moms who felt I'm control of how they wanted their births to happen- to the best of possible outcomes of course.... " and that reminder that it was as much about my not being miserable, because I am a low pain threshold momma, and it's better I KNEW and my birthing team knew, what was what I wanted/experienced that would determine the outcomes ❤❤❤
As someone with adhd, trying to process everything at once, including will i be aware enough to say I am experiencing this and need help was overwhelming enough. The thought of losing that the pain sensation that gives me feedback was terrifying. I needed to experience so I didn't feel out of control.
My mom had a medication free delivery and always regretted it. I had an epidural and my delivery was so beautiful and wonderful because I could stay present the entire time. I was actually so relaxed I was chatting happily with my husband between pushes. I was also very well rested because the epidural let me sleep.
Same with my mom. 🥺 Every time she tells someone the story of giving birth to me, she always mentions how she wishes she got the epidural. 💔 26 years later and she still regrets it. This is why I hate it when people spread the myth that women forget the pain after childbirth. They certainly do NOT.
I checked in, had dinner, started meds to induce labor, started labor, got my epidural, then slept through most of my labor. Pushed 5 times and had a brand new baby. It was great. Didn't even break a sweat.
My daughter just gave birth. Her epidural stopped working twice and during pushing it did not prevent the sever cramping after pushing that someone experience. News to me as I had never had that with 3 kids. I had an epidural and felt nothing. But she with an epidural and the anesthesiologist had to return 2 times to give extra meds and then did not prevent pain I’d say it’s not a guarantee to not have a horribly painful birth. She had a second degree tear and her placenta would not release. Midwife had to put her entire hand up to forearm inside her to pull placenta away. She lost 800ml of blood almost needed a transfusion. She felt it all. I can’t imagine what it would have been like for her had she went unmediated. I kept telling her I did her and her sister unmedicated but my third her brother I opted for an epidural due to back labor. She felt better and took it. I’m glad she did.
I've attended hundreds of births. the overwhelming majority of them did not have pain relief (as it is the norm in my country). I don't know who told you otherwise, but chatting between pushes is the norm in a birth without pain relief too.
@@sarastewart2633 depends on the birth. My daughter just had a traumatic birth with 2nd degree tear. The epidural failed and in between pushing she had severe cramping. There was no talking a all at this point. She could not handle our voices we had to stay silent. Maybe before transition there is talking but once transition hits the talking would be very limited. I had 2 drug free and once transition hit there was little time for talking. But my son i was medicated I talked laughed joked even during pushing as the epidural worked. If I could redo the two without drugs. I would choose to be pain free
When an unknown-to-me anesthesiologist strolled into the delivery room and said "Honey, I can make you feel comfortable" I reacted badly to his patronizing manner. When he walked out, walked back in and apologized for being a jerk, I was happy to have an epidural.
Preach it. I was put through so much hell from my midwives and Doulas and called all sorts of names when I finally after 33 hours of 1 minute apart contractions had C-section. I went through so much mental hell for a long time because they made me feel like a totally bad mom.
Oh Lord I hear you. I was 23 with my first, spent an hour pushing with the epi turned way down to feel enough (and got that kid turned from face-to-posterior to face-to-side in the process), and was crying and begging the whole time. I was actually apparently clenching my muscles so hard between contractions I was unable to advance the birth properly. So ob/gyn steps in and amps up my gas and does a big ole episiotomy, and as I'm zoning out just enough to get some pain relief (but not so much I cant still push while she uses forceps) I can hear her verbally fighting the midwife who kept insisting I could go further and what she was doing was wrong. Between my damn legs.
My ob/gyn was a 5-ft-nothing warrior queen who taught me to take no bull from midis that day. I've had good and bad ones - you always remember the outstanding examples of both. Let all here who read your story give you the thumbs up for being a super birth-mom!
For a bit of context I’m in NZ. With my first, initially I believed that I should get an epidural because I wouldn’t be able to do it without one. I feel lucky I went into the care of some amazing community midwives who educated me on the fact that I could it and opened up the option of no epidural for my labour and delivery. And also the door to delivery in a birthing centre instead of hospital. I started practising hypnobirthing in planning for the birth. It was all well until after 12h of active labour and being stuck around 6cm I tapped out and asked for the epidural. Was transferred to hospital in labour, got there and I was 8.5cm, anaesthetist was really busy, so I ended giving birth to my son epidural and intervention free in hospital. For my second I REALLY wanted to go epidural free and water labour/birth, and that’s what I got. I had practiced hypnobirthing again throughout my pregnancy. I was admitted around 11:30pm, was in the tub pretty much straight away with gas and air and gave birth a little over an hour later…
I am happy that my midwives allowed me to believe in myself while still supporting me making my own choice ❤
Hypnobirthing❤️
Supportive midwives - the difference between birth trauma and no birth trauma
@@TheKrispyfort yes! 100% this
My ex's sister had epidural complications. The nurse was new and injected it too high and she stopped breathing. It was actually ex MIL who noticed first and started compressions as the med staff was MIA. They eventually showed up and then had to give an emergency C-section. Mama and baby are both okay now and the cut on the baby's face didn't scar, but if ex MIL hadn't been an RN, idk what wouldn't have happened that day. So yeah, I think fear of complications is a reasonable concern when it comes to epidural.
@@jakemarie828 fear of complications is 100% why I refuse to go to the hospital
I can freely admit that I am no hero, and don’t need to prove to myself that I can give birth without pain medication. The amount of pain I was in giving birth to my sunny side up son WITH an epidural solidified that I could not survive without pain meds. Cannot imagine what it would have been like med free!!
💯 Apparently I was face-up *and* my mother's epidural wore off (and she tore 😒). With her second delivery she waited too long to ask for one (with a nine-pounder!), so with her third she just went without it. She has incredible pain tolerance (proven in other situations), but jeez, it's like the universe was like, "You're gonna feel this, lady!" (Me, I was planning to go unmedicated, but had an urgent C-section at 31 weeks - and damn, that spinal block was a wonderful thing.)
If you had pain with the epidural, you possibly could have been one of the few women whose epidural does not work. So you possibly actually had a 'medication-free' birth! It is horrible you experienced so much pain when you opted to have pain-free birth!
@@deonetbrits7095 I think you’re right. I had two boluses (boli??) to try to ease the pain and they just didn’t work. It didn’t help that my son was face up, 9 pounds with most of that in his head! Lol He’s still a big guy! Fortunately after him, my younger daughter was a breeze!
@@deonetbrits7095 … lol yeah. My first kid I entertained myself by stabbing myself in the leg with a pen going I can’t feel it! Nurse took my pen. Killjoy.
My granddaughter had a baby boy a week ago. She went through 30 hours of labour with no pain relief and she tore. It was totally her own choice. She's braver than me!
I have not yet had any children but my plan is med free. I don’t see if being too far off in my future. I know how scary it will be. My mother had all of us med free. My reasoning is for my own health. I am a recovering addict/ alcoholic, by the grace of God I am free from those chains. No medication for me. I know with God I will be able to handle it, no matter how difficult. I have an amazing support system and have grown tremendously in how to cope with physical and mental pain. I will never shame any woman for their choice on labor. But I also understand that my body was made for this. Love to all the mommas.
I was hoping not to have an epidural but doubted that would be possible. The morning I went into labor things seemed to be going well and I was trying not to go to the hospital too soon. An hour later I could barely stand and contractions were about 2 minutes apart. My husband drove me to the hospital and my goal was to get an epidural. I walked into the hospital, intermittently dropping to my knees, unable to walk as each contraction hit, but trying to look casual because I was embarrassed. I told them I wanted an epidural but when they checked me I was 9 cm dilated and it was too late. I promptly hyperventilated but about 45 minutes later had an unmedicated birth, which was eventually followed by 6 more. It is very empowering and makes a good story.
those babies! either taking too much time, or in a big rush :-D
Good god. I feel you in the immediate panic.
@@midnightmuse9829 When the nurses told me I was 9 cm dilated I started hyperventilating. A very kind nurse helped me slow down my breathing and overall it was an extremely positive experience.
My first birth was medication free and I loved every moment. I was so excited and ready to deliver my baby, and to feel everything. After I birthed my baby, I felt invincible and wanted to run a marathon lol. The doctor and nurses laughed and promptly brought me a wheelchair 🤣
If you don’t mind me asking - how much did your baby weigh?
@@elaine_1111 doesn't matter.
@@elaine_1111 you're just going to try and excuse any answer I give because I saw in one of your comments you don't "believe" in pain tolerance. Not only did adrenaline help but I also was mentally ready to give birth. I also am a person who loves getting tattoos, piercings, I don't flinch or feel pain getting shots and the like.
With my first I had stop and start labour for 72hours my water broke on day 2. I needed pitocin to get her out. 6 hours into the induction I wanted the epidural! With my 2nd my water broke at 6:45pm and baby was born at 9:02pm! No epidural in the water, literally an ideal birth! And I am proud of both experiences because I listened to my body and my team was with me the whole time!
This is Soo real! I was scared of the epidural (use to faint w shot and dizzy with blood draws) so didn’t think I’d be able to and then birth ended up being 20x more traumatic then if I would of just gotten the epidural
If I didn't love you insanely before, I do now. But I did before. So I just love you more. You're so wonderful for empowering women and those that give birth.
For my 3rd baby I chose to do hypnobirth and it was an incredible pain free birth… it was exhilarating. I agree that each person should be choosing based on the experience they want rather then on fear. To each their own. It’s great that we all have the choice.
I’m so happy to hear another person had a positive hypnobirth story. I used hypnobirthing with all 3 of my pregnancies and it really worked for me.
I had 3 unmedicated births with a doula and the last two were hypnobirths. I can't say that the births were completely pain free, however the hypnobirth plan worked for me.
@@MsMcwill my 4th baby I also used hypnobirth and it was a good birth but not pain free like my 3rd. Each birth is different, and each is definitely a lot of work, but my first 2 were way harder and more painful than the ones where I used hypno. It’s funny though because the one who came the easiest has been the most independent and mischievous of them. Haha.
Honestly, I'd recommend doing at least some hypnobirthing prep to anyone, even if they plan to have an epidural. It is just so calming and helps make the process much less scary.
As someone who has had a medicated and unmedicated birth....epidurals are wonderful. Truly a gift of science.
When I had my now 5month old, my birth was SOOOO fast and i had no time to get any pain relief. I was so scared and in pain but that baby wasnt waiting and nursing staff were FRANTIC cause I just showed up screaming and they didnt have my file or any of my history on them. I pushed her out in 6 minutes but I experienced a lot of trauma from it.
In hindsight, I am grateful and proud to have done it - but please please dont deny someone pain relief... I couldnt look at the pants i wore to hospital for 3 months after because I would remember the pain. Now, my loved ones were very supportive of me and were pretty hands off (by my request) so there was no pressure by them thankfully ❤ my mother laughed and said I beat her baby birthin record 😂 but, again, dont let the people you love suffer. If they have the choice, let them choose ❤
When people say they don't want an epidural my first thought is they are crazy. But that's because my first labor, delivery and eventual emergency c section was traumatic and horrific. but those people who can choose to go through labor and delivery without pain medication is impressive. I'm not a fan of the epidural process but it was worth it.
3 med free births two of which were over 9 lbs and yep it was my choice and worth it. I wanted to remember it, feel it, and totally would do it again.
I didn't want an epidural for the same reason, I wanted to truly experience birth. There was a point I would've taken it if possible towards the end, but had my baby a birthing center so it never was an option. Water birth helps a lot. I'm so glad, it was worth it. I learned a lot about myself. Labor is a mental and physical trip.
Also a birthing center was less than $2k with visits. $40k hospital bill, hell no, physical pain is better than financial destruction at the same time as a new infant.
@@andromedaspark2241 wow where does it cost $40k to have a birth? 😮I had mine in a regular hospital(renowned in my area of giving birth) and it was about $6K-8K when all was said and done and my insurance paid most of it.
Me too. 3 big baby natural births. Our bodies are incredible. Breathing is what got me through them.
@@CJ-mn6iw you just said, “insurance”. I would assume that’s where most of that cost went, because that price isn’t unheard of. Depends greatly on which part of the country you’re in and what services you have options for.
2 things:
1. I wanted to ~experience~ it. A massive fan of *The Business of Being Born* , had a midwife (our hospital has since DONE AWAY with the midwifery program!!! 🤯) and I really wanted that natural connection with birth. Then I had to be induced. Then I couldn't get past 8cm. I stuck it out as long as I could, but I highly regret doing that. It was a very traumatic birthing experience. Do remember though my blood pressure had spiked (Not obese, it just happened. Same with my mom.) So REALLY rethink it if you have to be induced and you're not progressing well.
2. If you're afraid of an epidural: *You will NOT care by the time you need one.* By the time you truly feel you NEED that epidural (which, bear in mind, if you're really far ahead or induced, they can only do it BETWEEN contractions, so it can be pretty drawn out, waiting for a contraction to stop) you will NOT care about how it feels. The pain of an epidural will feel like a bee sting by that point.
Just be as informed as you possibly can. Remember that if you want to make God laugh, make a *PLAN* 😆 Also, everyone is different. What worked for them (even me) doesn't work for everyone. Do NOT feel pressure from anyone. If your MIL is pressuring you, tell your partner to step up and tell her to leave you alone. If your PARTNER is pressuring you... Throw them in the trash :P
For real re: induction, that’s a whole different ball game, and definitely worth doing with pain meds for me!
They made me get my epidural *during* a contraction and it was terrifying. I regret choosing that hospital. I am pretty mad still about how it was done. But I do not regret the epidural itself. Not even a little
Pain raises your blood pressure. If you're in enough pain you can have a stroke.
I’m terrified of needles anywhere near my back.
I’ve had two emergency csections. The first one was after pushing for 2.5 hours and they had to push my son back into my uterus. (This is super super shortened version of this story leaving out lots of things I will never forget). The worst part? The needle near my back. 😂
So yeah. I promise some of us will always be scared of that no matter what.
I wanted unmedicated for other reasons and even though all my deliveries have been csections im still glad of the choices I’ve made, but the needle was definitely a dual motivation. 😅
It was actually less scary the second time because I wasn’t having intense pushing contractions. The scariest part was my body having mega pushing contractions while they were trying to stick something in my spine. I was terrified I would move and be paralyzed for life.
Well, thankfully they monitor your blood pressure pretty heavily during birth, especially if you're already having an experience with BP issues due to pre-eclampsia. Stroke is POSSIBLE, but not probable, especially in a patient without hx of blood clots or high blood pressure. All the more reason to be healthy *before* getting pregnant 😊
I have a pretty high pain tolerance, but for me, I don’t get why someone would choose to go through something painful when there’s the option not to. Everyone is different, we’re so lucky to have choices!
Same, it’s the same to not getting anesthesia during surgery
I think people pick the option that is the least painful. If I had an epidural, it would mean I was not in control of my body and vulnerable and that is the worst feeling in the world for me. I will experience any physical pain to avoid that mental anguish. It's never a simple choice 💁♀️
Welcome to needle anxiety. Where your brain tells you the needle is more painful than natural childbirth.
I always knew I would want an epidural, and I am so glad I got one. I was able to get a bit of sleep before it was time to push. Was able to push out my 9.5 lb baby, and hold her and blissfully tell her how much I loved her and how happy I was to finally meet her as my midwife stitched me up.
My mom gv me a hard time for getting the epi becuz she had me all natural . I said good for you im getting it and I ended up delivering a week early before her flight to be there for the birth...everything happens for a reason
Just because you put yourself through that, why would I?
@@C-SD exactly 💯 👏
Hillary - your timing was amazing 🤣
@@C-SD you'd think she'd be more understanding, wouldn't you
Shes a narcissistic manipulator
My epidural puncture took over 20 years to heal completely, but it really wasn't an option to NOT have one at the point that I had it. They hormonally induced labour in me because my waters had broken a month & a half before my due date, but that resulted in me being having almost continuous contractions with only a 3cm cervical dilation. I had wanted to try a medication free delivery, but those 15 minutes of full on labor with a tiny cervical opening before they gave me the epidural & it kicked in was the most painful day of my life. Seriously, it felt like HOURS.
That was in 1991. These days, they don't automatically induce labour with early amniotic sac rupture, & I say amen to that.
I truly wanted an unmedicated birth. I tried with my first and I just couldn't do it. I got an epidural and feel no shame. With my second I tried again and was successful. It helped that the second time i knew what my body would do in labor. It should always be your choice. Nothing is more personal than giving birth.
I didn't want an epidural, mainly because I did not want anything in my spine. I told myself "if my mom can deliver 9lb babies without meds so can I", but I was still terrified. Turns out I didn't have time for pain meds for any of my babies. They all were born within an hour of labor beginning. I nearly had them in the car each time just trying to make it to the hospital.
Same, but did you not have other options besides the epi, or is that something they just did here?
@@C-SD when labor goes that fast, there literally isn’t time to order the labor-related pain relief, have the anesthesiologist show up, have them able to place the epi/spinal between contractions, and then take effect, before the baby arrives. You can get pain relief afterwards, absolutely, but relief isn’t as simple as hooking up an IV in your arm.
Waaaait pleaaase. Im 15 weeks and a first time mom and you said theres just an hour when you gave birth. like labor is about 16 hrs. so were you at home yhe whole 14 hrs?? Can I also do that?
@@ferrero8575 the length of labor can vary wildly, depending on mom, baby, position, previous births, etc. One hour from first contraction to baby being out is the exception, not the rule! :)
You can absolutely labor at home for hours, even days, if things are slow and irregular. Most OBs will want to hear from you if your water breaks, though, because then they worry about either infection or stressing the baby.
Most of all: bring these questions with you to your next appointment. Your doctor can answer your questions specific to your circumstances much better than strangers on the internet. :)
@Ferrero my labors were very out of the norm. Super fast labors are not common at all, but it happens! Some women take hours, some take days. Each woman, pregnancy, and labor is different. So don't freak out (if you were worried). And I wish you luck with yours!
Don't call yourself a wuss!! 🤗 There are so many factors that play for each person and things can change rapidly even when you have a plan. We all need to support each other regardless of the details of an individual birth 💞
It's about supporting Mamas and it's definitely not about taking on the weight of other people's control issues during the most vulnerable moment of your life. 🤣
Love you videos!!
I went into my labor wanting a medication free birth. Things did not go to plan and 10 hours later I was getting a C-section. I will tell you what, as soon as that spinal went in I realized how much pain I actually was in, and I literally thought to myself “oh my word I could actually sleep this feels amazing!!” so if you are reading this, and are worried that you will regret getting an epidural, I can promise you, you will not!
I just want to express to you that I really appreciate your channel and your truthful discussions and facts on this topic are incredibly important. Not all women have the same access to education, information, medicine, or a judgement-free space to ask these types of questions. THANK YOU FOR WHAT YOU DO!!!
My wife didn't have the option.
First baby came too fast and the second one was a home birth (by choice).
She said the pain was really hard, but the exhaustion was worse. They even had to give her sugar water because of the shaking. Probably low blood sugar.
Yes the exhaustion is real. I was given honey or coconut water when I couldn’t keep anything else down.
I was a needle phobe who pushed for hours to avoid the needle. I didn't feel it at all and I was so relaxed for the first time that day. My brain was so quiet during my C-section! Out of the 40kish I paid, the anesthesiologist was a happily paid bill.
$40k? 😧
I had the epidural for the first, the twins I had a spinal and C-section, my youngest was au natural and I’m so glad I got each experience (although the section was sooo tough to recover from).
I had both of those motivations. Terrified to my wits end to have an epi and also wanted to experience doing it without.
Then I was induced and those induction meds hit and I thought I was dying. Got the epidural. It was the best decision of my life.
Second baby I got it as soon as I was allowed to bc again, I was induced. Don’t try and be a hero. Don’t let people shame you in to feeling like an awful person if you get it. Just do what’s best for you ❤
I've done both & pain levels were the same for me. The main difference was the added cost and the added pain of a needle in my back.
I went in thinking I'm going to try to give birth without medication but then after about 7 hours of labor decided to get the epidural and was extremely happy I did as it made time speed up since I could sleep.
I had a pain medication free birth. I asked for the epidural but got turned down, as "I wasn't dilated enough". I gave birth 10 min after that decision. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. If I could have, I'd still have liked to do something against that seemingly endless labour pain.
My mom has a very high pain tolerance, but I didn't realize how high until I found out she gave birth to my brother without ANY anesthesia. If I went through that, I'd talk about it to anyone who'd listen. She only told me because I directly asked her if she'd had an epidural for that birth. She even said she would've given birth to me the same way, too, if the doctor hadn't advised a C-section.
I was in so much pain I could barely walk during my last 6 weeks of pregnancy. I was so grateful to have pain meds once I was in labor because I was in less pain than I’d been in for weeks. (At least until she crowned)
I'm a retired physician, graduated 1984😮). We didn't have ready access to epidurals. Oh, my. There were times I wanted a rubber hammer, (often for the patient's mother), but it would have been so lovely to have this available and accepted. Thank you for explaining this so calmly and completely.
My mom labored for over 24 hours before delivering me. She asked for an epidural as a naive young woman without anyone to advocate for her, and her male doctor told her she wouldn’t be a real mother if she was medicated and that it’s not that bad
With all 4 of my babies, I really wanted a medication free birth because I wanted to experience it, in all 4 though, I ended up getting one. I was really heartbroken over not being able to get through my birth the first time without an epidural, and it didn’t help that there were several complications, and ended up being traumatic for me, but with the others I wasn’t as upset over it. I look back, and still wish I would have been able to at least do one medication free, but I don’t dwell on it because I’m just happy my babies all got here earthside safely, and are healthy, and that was, and is the most important thing to me.
Ever since I was a teen I’ve wanted a C-section. I’m 32 and I’ve seen a lot of people around me give birth and I’m still convinced it’s the better choice for me. Don’t let anyone pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do. Your body your choice❤
Idk any doctors that would ok an elective C/S. Fine if you need one or in an emergency, but the risks and recovery are not worth it, at all.
As someone who planned to use Hypnobabies and ended up with an emergency c-section: don’t assume the CS is better! It is, keep in mind, major abdominal surgery. I had to give over control of everything to medical staff during the birth-including them strapping my arms down away from my body, and depending on the nurses to listen to me when I said I felt like I wasn’t getting enough oxygen. I didn’t feel the CS, sure, but I felt incredibly vulnerable laying on that operating table, not knowing what was happening because they were busy saving my baby’s life. Maybe it would have been different if it were planned, but it’s not something I would choose to go through again.
Then there was the recovery period. It was literally days before I could stand up without help. I tried to walk down the hall to the elevator to get to the NICU; I wasn’t even halfway when I had to sit in the wheelchair to continue. The first time I showered, while still in the hospital, I quickly realized I couldn’t stand without support, and so couldn’t actually clean myself up. I had to ask my husband to strip down and wash me, while I leaned against the wall.
If you still want an elective CS, and have a doctor who will support it, the TLDR is this is major surgery, not an easy way out of delivery. Plan to need a lot of support that includes not only the normal post-partum stuff, but also surgical recovery, which has its own complications.
@@KristenK78 I’ve had more than 5 elective surgeries. I know what they entail. Where I come from you can choose to have a planned C-section and choose your doctor. It’s really not up to them ☺️ I come from a very big family ( we are more than a 100 people from my father’s side alone) I’ve seen a lot of births and I simply don’t want to put my body through vaginal birth. I know what I want and we are all entitled to our opinions🥰 I am so sorry that you didn’t have the birth you planned I know it must’ve been hard. I really hope you are your baby are happy and healthy now 😍
@@yutsouy1227 Where I come from it’s not up to the Dr. The mother can plan a c-section no problem at all. If for any reason a specific doctor doesn’t want to do it, you can choose any Dr. you like. All the mothers around me are giving birth that way and they are all happy and healthy and so are their babies.
@@yutsouy1227 Because women through time have died from so called ‘natural’ birth. There are so many complications that can happen and put the baby and the mother at risk. A lot of governments convince women that it’s the safer choice because it’s cheaper. Just ask anyone with a high risk pregnancy and they will tell you that they had to have a c- section done because it’s safer. I’ve personally lived through this. So please if you haven’t spare me your advice.