Every time I hear a story about a miracle sibling, I just come to wish for the few-years-later update with the parents coming and lamenting about why their child doesn't talk with them anymore.
I wouldn't have cancelled the birthday party. I would've made sure EVERY SINGLE PERSON saw the cake with a huge chunk out of it and told EVERY SINGLE PERSON why there was a huge chunk taken out of it.
Why? Don't the guests as well as the birthday person deserve to have a "virgin" birthday cake that hasn't been touched yet? This is like a king deciding to bed somebody else's wife right before the man even has the chance to take her maidenhood.
@@lorilancaster5917 it would have been a loss either way, possibly. I would have gotten severely punished for stating those facts as they think it's "talking back" or "insolence".
Yeah, I think the sisters are mostly jealous that OP has a happy marriage to someone she loves AND financial security. Otherwise, why are they constantly talking about OP's marriage? Obviously the nieces only approached OP because their moms had been trash talking OP to them.
And they are mad at OP for answering their kids questions honestly. They wouldn’t ask those questions if they would keep their mouth shut about OPs marriage. Its like they were planning on using their kids to try and guilt trip OP. OPs and spouse’s relationship is between them.
@@lorilancaster5917and the whole "You're manipulating them because you're miserable!" is just pure projection. Everything op has said demonstrates shes happy yet who is consistently bitter, angry and picking fights? Typically it's only miserable people who act like this.
That's the key right there. OP is clearly far from miserable, in fact due to open, honest communication she has a much healthier relationship than most do.Granted, it is VERY non-traditional (well, for a certain definition of marriage at least) but as long s it's two consenting adults not hurting anyone, each other, or themselves it sounds like an awesome pairing.
Story 1: So let me get this straight. Op's parents continually favor the little sister over Op, and haven't celebrated their birthday in _ages_ because they're always "too broke", so Op works hard to make enough of _their own money_ so that they can finally have a party of their own, spent all of _their_ hard earned money to buy everything for it, only for the parents to take a slice from the cake that _Op, not them, Op_ paid for which can technically count as theft (not enough for police to care but theft nonetheless) causing Op to have to cancel because they couldn't trust them to not ruin anything else but also couldn't afford to move it somewhere else... _And the "friend" thinks Op is overreacting?_
If OP's parents are too broke, OP should look into getting gifts for himself. I would start by gifting himself an apartment. Couple that with the satisfaction of leaving a "Fuck you" note to your parents as your only departure notice.
I wouldn't blame OP if OP decides to "unfriend" the friend for thinking that way. That was NOT an "overreaction", that was appropriate for the situation at hand. Maybe OP's friend is guilty of underreacting.
I've experienced almost this growing up. When I had cried to my friends about the situations, they listened, but it was in one ear and out the other. As an adult I realized they probably didn't understand the gravity of the situation- they grew up with loving parents, and didn't experience the constant abuse, neglect, etc, so they didn't understand the toxicity of my parents.
Im so glad you pointed out that the OP3's nieces only asked about her being a gold digger bc HER SISTERS WERE TELLING THEIR DAUGHTERS THAT SHE’S A GOLD DIGGER, then getting pissy when she confirmed it fairly gracefully. They're literally just mad that she's not ashamed of it lol
Oh they definitely want her to be ashamed of herself! Cause being a gold digger is usually frowned upon, so in their minds, if op isn't ashamed of it, then there's something wrong with her, and she didn't need to be influencing the nieces that being a gold digger is ok. It's like people who are homophobic. They think people who are gay or trans have something mentally wrong with them, because they are not what the majority of what society grew up thinking of as normal, so that makes them screwed up somehow, when they're just living their lives, and not anyone else's business, lol.
Yup, because her readily admitting it is her also admitting that she's not as miserable as her sisters are telling everyone. Which means they're pissed because they *are* miserable and were using this as a means to make themselves feel better, which obviously fell a part when it turned out she's actually happy with her arrangements lol.
RSlash may just be the most prepared for raising baby Lily to NOT be entitled and not be an entitled parent! That story of Lily giving the slice of birthday cake to her grandma is so precious!!!
Yeah, the thing with most kids is, they WANT other people to be happy. So if you explain to them in a calm and simple way that something makes people unhappy, they'll generally stop doing it. It's also very important to teach children that they cannot always get what they want. The crazy thing is, it's very easy to teach that without beatings or other forms of abuse, simply through honest, direct communication. NOT teaching them this one critical fact can ruin them forever, because the first time they come up against the world outside their bubble of enablers, they'll be completely unprepared for the concept of "no".
@Nerobyrne the little kid I mind is a terror a lot of the time but if you say you're sick she hugs you and is quiet because she's been sick and she knows how much it SUCKS
the comical thing about story 3 is that i guarantee the reason op's nieces/nephews were so curious and fascinated over her being in the marriage of convenience is because of how much her siblings hate it and how much they condemn her choices in private. if the siblings didn't condemn it as much than i bet the children wouldn't have really cared or at least didn't have as much fascination over it
Right. They call her a gold digger but gold diggers pretend to have feelings in order to get the benefits. While OP and her husband are in an honest HEALTHY relationship. It sounds like there’s no deceit happening here. Kudos to both of them. They’re happy the way things are.
@@stevenandcarminabeedle9089exactly my thoughts. By oure blunt af definition, yeah op might be counted as a golddigger. But by common sense it is just a marriage of convience and friends with benefits. Honestly the 'golddigger' claim kinda goes out the window with both op and her husband knowing what the agreement was beforehand.
Anniversary story: I absolutely knew that OP’s daughter would want them to babysit the grandkids. When it was OP’s and his wife’s anniversary vacation. 🙄🙄🙄 Talk about entitlement and spoiled. Sure, switching the tickets last minute was cowardly, but I understand where OP was coming from. I agree with RSlash that they should have both stood firm from the start, but still give them 0/5 buttholes.
@@cardinalchaos2278 Agreed. I think the wife deserves a higher butthole score. It was apparent that wife was favouring and spoiling the daughter, and so raising the daughter to be an entitled butthole. At some point, they'll wonder why the sons go LC or NC with them.
@@cardinalchaos2278she seems to have no problems making him the bad guy. I’m curious how their other children feel about Jane forcing herself on her parents anniversary trip?
For sure. OP should not feel guilty. He said the wife has a hard time saying no. If she felt entitled to invite herself and her family, expect them to pay, AND babysit she clearly has never heard the word no. Let this be a lesson. I hope they enjoyed their huge anniversary occasion to celebrate!
Story 3: So OP is “completely inappropriate” for confirming everything her sisters said about her? Not the sisters for saying those things and teaching them to their daughters in the first place?
Here's what I don't get about "miracle babies" and their overlooked siblings. In the bulk of these stories, kids who are deemed "miracle babies" usually happen after a long stretch of reproductive failure, and the neglected siblings are usually the oldest. Wouldn't the oldest kid also be a "miracle baby" for being the result of, presumably, the first try between parents who are found to struggle with fertility issues or miscarriages?
it's like parents who have 'miracle children' as second (or any other number child) forget that they even have other children. 🙄🙄 I can understand having ONE SINGLE CHILD and never being able to have another ever again being a miracle, but it's still scummy to raise that child on a pedestal. for every set of parents that make a huge deal out of a rainbow baby there are probably 50 others that don't do that, or 100 others that can never have a child no matter how much they try or WHAT they try.
Yeah. Because "Frufru" means gay basically so he called plant based milk gay bs. And we know that for these people gay=weak=bad. The usual case of fragile masculinity
It’s fear. In his day “no one” drank anything other than cow milk. So the fact people are seemingly doing things differently more and more than he’s used to, it scares him. Otherwise he wouldn’t be so angry about what other people drink and so entitled to be vocal about it when it’s none of his business. I think OP was absolutely appropriate. I mean he asked if it would kill them. OP answered.
Our daughter is severely ALLERGIC to all dairy products, not lactose intolerant. Allergic. She has an epi pen for it. What does he care what other’s drink anyhow? Mind your business mate! Does he get so vocal at restaurants and what people order? Nutter
Story 3: honestly, I wouldn’t classify it as “gold-digging” if both people agree to it as an arrangement they’re both comfortable with. Throughout history, most marriages were more about survival than actual love. Nothing illegal here. The nieces are rather naturally curious about it all. They get a zero score because it’s not wrong just to ask the question, and they weren’t pestering OP, she just answered no problem. Sounds like a very healthy auntie-niece relationship.
I agree. :3 Two year olds can even understand it's not appropriate for a whole class of sophomores to be acting like the high school concert band is the time to act like we're at the football game. XD
I know, it's so adorable. I worked at a day care until covid. I saw every kid enjoy other kids bday. But several of the parents have often complained about how terrible their kids behavior was at bdays and were SHOCKED that their kid was fine. Sure, a full party is a bit different but those parents also used to be the ones who would want everyone to bend over backwards to keep their kid happy at the expense of others. (Full disclosure, I was told that as a child my sis and I were little shits at each others partys for a while but no one else's. Sibling things lol)
I don’t know how old OP is but she’s not too young for an exit strategy. But I don’t think she should’ve canceled the party. Parents and sister win again.
The thing with the "gold digger" story that OP should point out to the young (she didn't mention she did) is that her relationship is consensual on both sides. It's ok if both agree to marry because of money, but usually gold diggers trick the husband pretending to love for the money, which is not a healthy relationship
She DID tell the first one who asked for advice only do it if it's all positive and not negative, but yh, she should put emphasis on that to all of them.
And it's also a marriage of convenience for OP's husband, since his parents wanted a certain type (presumably traditional/religious?) of wife for him. I think OP even said that her husband gets the advantage of "not being cut out of the money" or something like that
OP could’ve given them a head up but who wouldn’t prefer having their own apartment for free instead of a room? Apparently OPs parents since they may have hoped to take over her entire place
Came here to say this. My grand parents are this way for the last five years. Visiting them is not about spending time together, it's about doing house repair, chores, and cooking for them.
On the "Parent's Choice" story -- it's clear what's happening. The parents are upset because if they have their own space, they have to CLEAN their own space. If they have their own kitchen, they have to cook their own meals, etc., etc. They thought they were moving in to the guest room to be GUESTS and have OP wait on them hand and foot.
And OP knew that and acted accordingly. Especially if they work from home. Nothing wrong with that. They’re close enough for care or emergencies but separate enough for privacy. Win win.
If I find out that you're hosting a barbecue steak party and ask to be invited. Then when I show up you give me a grilled cheese sandwich, and tell me that steak is for everyone else and not me. I'm going to be pissed at you. Op is absolutely the butthole for not making it clear in the beginning what his parents accommodations were going to be.
Story 1 : NTA.. i heard this story before.. Those "parents" are the true monsters.. anyone who treats one kid different from the other is a POS and deserves to be publicly shamed....Drop that friend then tell them " this is not an overreaction your no longer a friend bye felicia ".. Story 2 : NTA.. jane just wanted a free gateway and babysitting.. op finally found a freaking backbone and made his wife find a backbone and telling a freaking adult a backbone.. "she still doesn't like how jane is mad at us and wants me to apologize" you 2 Finally find a backbone and she wants you to apologize..apologize for what exactly for finally saying no ?? Apologize for the wife decades of awful parenting which lead to jane being a super entitled dweeb who thinks the world is about her?? Story 3 : NTA.. The young adults asked questions and op answered ..theyre no longer 4 or 5 so she doesnt need to lie to them.. op sisters are complete grunts and op need to start limiting contact with those bitter jerks.. op should still go just with her husband and take pictures of the house and post it all over social media with " hmmm fun place" and then pictures with her husband and caption that with " he doesnt judge me for being me thats real family" and watch the crap storm ensue.. Story 4 : NTA..The guy is a nosey POS who needs to mind his own damn business..newsflash bruhh no one cares what you think is real whats fake people have enough problems then to deal with your adult tempertantrums and BS.. Story 5 : NTA.. your house your rules ..They dont like it they can get a hotel or go to a nursing home..
Of course his friend says that because HE wasn't the one getting abused. How about HE swap places with OP then? Then maybe he can see how bad favouritism is.
@@dracko158 they'll never do that because they're probably entitled a holes as well... there's a saying " hard times shows who your true friends and the real phonies are" so that"friend" couldn't be a bigger phony...
Last story about the elderly parents being put in the converted garage to live... I find it hard to believe that this plan wasn't mentioned to the parents at least once (or, better, several times) in the planning stage for the move.
I've got to agree with you. As I was listening to the story, I was was also wondering how this wouldn't have been discussed before the parents sold off their home and moved in. I can understand how the parents might feel tricked when they thought they would be living inside the home.
I’m under the belief that the garage was mentioned several times and the parents dismissed OP because they assumed OP was not serious. If they don’t like it (like OP said) there are nursing homes, retirement communities, assisted living facilities, motels, hotels, and holiday inns.
Oh 100% guaranteed the barista from story 4 went to the back and shared the shit out of that story. It probably made them laugh the rest of their shift. I wish someone had done that when I worked at sbucks. People getting offended over OTHER people's drinks was more common than I thought it would be
I've literally witnessed people go into Starbucks before and LOUDLY order the strongest and blackest coffee they could while looking around smugly so I'm not at all surprised by that story. And yes, as someone who worked retail for a couple decades, we DEFINITELY gossip about customers amongst ourselves in the retail and service industry
I've had a similar situation at a store when I was getting almond milk. Some guy told me it wasn't real milk and I told him it was the closest thing to real milk I could drink. He then said kids these days. I turned to expect to see some 50 or 60 yr old instead he was early 30s. I kind of laughed and said, you're what like 30, and he said "I'm older than you." I then replied with when I was younger, they taught us to respect our elders and if we had nothing nice to say don't say nothing at all, and apparently you never got that lesson, also I'm in my late 30s. I basically told him not to pop off at the mouth to people he don't know, his next interaction might not be so friendly. I've seen him in the same store a few times but he don't say nothing, I'll get a nod here and there but that's it.
@@TomDarkwulf87i hope OP made their day! What small, sad, and insecure men to loudly order what they think is the manliest drink. I’m sure it’s also funny, but gets really old really quickly.
@@stevenandcarminabeedle9089 The story kinda reminds me of that one scene in Napoleon Dynamite(I think it was something along the lines of "You're drinking 1%, is that because you think you're fat? because if not you could be drinking whole" or something to that effect.)
@tomaibetter I agree. Rslash is just the type to give life lessons to relate why his scores are they way they are. Because he has a family himself, and that's why I love his videos. 🥂 I'll drink to that!
For the first story I'm reminded of another story where op's younger sibling was a miracle child and got op's 10th through 18th birthdays highjacked (among other things). The 18th sent op over the edge and told relatives over how op's life got constantly screwed up or ignored by op's parents and sibling (raised by narcissists). Probably while still a sobbing mess. The family all nearly instantly turned on the parents and sibling and got them blacklisted from everything family related. At first the parents were pissed at op, then sobbing themselves from the backlash and eventualy trying to mend things with op (good luck trying to mend 8 years of someone's life) and sent op's sibling to a boarding school much to their own distaste for the idea.
First Story, NTA: Dealing with blatant favoritism and theft is a valid reason to cancel a party. OP needs to look into moving out because this behavior isn’t going to stop. OP's sister is going to grow up being a brat that no one will like to be around Second Story, NTA: Jane basically wanted to hijack OP and his wife's anniversary vacation. OP did the right thing in my opinion because it seems like Jane was never told "no" before and it kinda seems like OP's wife is to blame for that. So what if she is the only daughter and youngest, she should be told "no" like anyone else. Jane isn’t entitled to a free vacation. The thing is, Rslash OP did put his foot down and said no but OP's wife wouldn't Third Story, NTA: I personally think that OP's marriage is bothering from both sides (her's and her husband's reasons) but its their life and I don’t judge. That said, OP's sisters can’t disrespect and ridicule OP for her reasonings for marrying her husband and just expect them to still use the summer house for the vacation. This is a cut and clear case of actions have consequences Fourth Story, NTA: This guy wants to get into people's business...over milk so he got (in detail) why OP can’t drink milk. Instead of assuming that everyone can drink milk and not judge people who don’t drink regular milk, maybe this guy should realize that not everyone can stomach regular milk Fifth Story, NTA: I’d rather live in a fully fournished garage than in a nursing home if I was OP's parents, on top of the fact that they would be living there rent free and have the freedom to do whatever they want
Story 3: So.. OP is living her best life. Super happy. Her and her husband are HAPPY with their life choices and everything is fine. And the sisters have an issue and call her a gold digger and say that her life is "fucked up"? Seems like her life is far better than theirs if they're being so bitter lmao. Guess they're scared of their children following her footsteps and living happier lives than them.
When RSlash starts talking about his daughter and how he’s teaching her about how to behave at other people’s birthdays. When he mentioned that Lily gave her grandmother the first slice of birthday cake as it was her grandma’s birthday was really touching! How sweet!
That guy throwing a fit over the milk substitutes in the coffee shop probably went home later to complain about how soft and offended the younger generation get.
Story 2: I'm more upset with the wife because OP said no, she went over him to invest them, although he could please put down harder. Literally the a hole here is the spoiled daughter who couldn't care less that she was taking away her parents 40th anniversary. You owe her no apology and people like this always come back when they want something, so don't chase after her when she calls you asking for more free stuff tell her you are not her personal piggy bank/ child care / whatever else she thinks she can force you into.
Exactly. I’m glad OP stuck up for both of them. Maybe that will help her stand up for herself next time her daughter tries to impose. Because there will be a next time.
The first story reminds me of that /r/EntitledChildren post where the OP lost all of their birthdays to their "miracle" baby sister for 8 years, until they finally blew up at their 18th birthday, which was being held at a Chuck E. Cheese-like establishment. The entire family had been blinded to it until the blow up, abruptly apologized, and ganged up on the parents, who tried to come up with excuses, but dug themselves deeper. The grandfather gave OP a used car, which the bratty sister damaged with a hammer.
And there were some people that think that story was fake because of age and something else. Except "parents" really do that to they kids in term of a golden child. And the results be on them much later. So, could wish is fake but people do that for real
Story 3: I have this personal idiom of mine i think fits here. Whats wrong with being weird as long as youre not hurting anyone? Its not exactly what youd expect from a marriage but as long as the Husband and Wife are happy/content with the situation, then wtf is the problem? Im also on the NTA train just in case.
Story 2 - They will get over it when the daughter needs free babysitting. I swear, to invite yourself on an anniversary trip for a free vacation and you damn well know, they ain't gonna do any parenting on that trip and force it all on OP and his wife.
I love to hear the little stories of Dabney life. I've been listening long enough to hear puppy bloopers, I'm going to be a dad, and now cute toddler stories. Much needed amongst all the crazy from reddit. Thanks Rslash. 😊
The guy at the coffee shop thinks hes the main character, so treating him as anything other than stunning and brave for defending dairy wasnt what he prepared for.
Story 1: And this is why there really should be a "sibling fairness" law. Seriously, what's the holdup? Story 2: If Jane and her husband had wanted a vacation from parenting, they should have left their kids with a traditional babysitter. You know, at home.
With the 40th anniversary trip story, with the adult daughter (husband and childern) asking to go as well. As soon as OP and his wife agreed, I was figuring that they would be used as baby sitters while everyone was on the trip. But when OP stated that he and his wife paid for the grandkids tickets, with the understanding that the daughter and husband would pay for their own. I had the thought that the daughter and husband would show up at airport with the grandkids. Then tell OP and his wife something like... "we didn't buy tickets for ourselves and plan to stay home, here are the kids.... bye". Then quickly leave the airport.
Story 1: Ahhh yes, yet ANOTHER story where in a few years, the awful parents will have to deal with the bratty golden child and will wonder why Op doesnt speak with them when they “always tried to make things even”. NTA Op, you poor thing.
Story 1: here’s an idea for revenge, when it is the sister birthday take a slice of cake the night before and if they get upset say that they let her take a slice of cake. Also recorded the reaction and if your in trouble blasting that recording all over
Story 5: It's pretty convenient for everything they need to be in one place, so what's the problem? I myself would be thrilled, no stairs to use and everything on ground floor and arm's reach, so I'd consider this a win.
I think it's a mix of not thinking that the garage is a "proper" part of the hourse plus feeling like they're being left in a smal shack, as well as a feeling entitled to living in the "good" rooms, because they're OP's parents.
I suspect the parents were planning to move in the main house and have OP handle all of the shopping, cooking, and household chores for them too. In the garage the parents would still be responsible for their own housework and less able to coerce OP into doing all of the chores for them.
Story 2 nta I heard this one before as well.Its your anniversary trip and she wanted to turn it into her personal trip while you watch your grandchildren.
Story 3; So they're going to sit there and rip you to shreds about being a golddigger, all while holding their hands out expecting you to share the gold you dug? Don't bite the hand that feeds. NTA
In the office I used to work in, a real nudzh decided that we would all go plant based for milk. The kitchen area supplies are paid for by the office. She ran a campaign of pestering everyone until they switched. I said fine and I'll just buy my own milk. No, this nutcase dumped out my milk and informed me ‘We are a plant based office now.’ I complained to HR and just bought another carton, she dumped that out too but this time replaced it with a nut milk, after noticing the nasty taste I immediately projectile vomited which probably saved me a lot of bother. Within a minute a rash started spreading all over my face then chest then arms. I was rushed to the regional hospital thankfully less than half a kilometer away, I arrived right as my throat was starting to close. It gets stupider. I was given a very forced half-hearted apology where she spent most of the time decrying the evils of dairy. Less than a week later she was fired after replacing my milk with oat milk. I’m also mildly allergic to oats. I should have had her arrested.
Last Story: OP is within her right to choose the room that her parants will stay in, and OP's parants should be more greatful. However, OP is showing that her parants are a low prority to her. OP's dogs get a bedroom to themselfs, but OP's parants have to sleep in the gararge? Could she not rearange a room to accomidate the parants?
In terms of the last story, my grandmother actually got workers years ago to convert her garage into a master bedroom with a sizable bath. And we barely talk about the fact it used to be the garage. The only signs of it being the garage is the garage doors that have been closed off by a wall from the inside, but on the outside, the garage doors are still there.
About the last story - they are just confused by the fact the guesthouse used to be a garage. You know, what people usually use garages for (aside from sheltering their vehicles)? Storing stuff they don't need. I'm pretty sure that's why they make a fuss, they are reading this as being compared to a useless junk.
So Jane heard about your special romantic trip, invites herself, and plans to dump the kids on you so she could have a romantic trip? That’s just selfish
I hate when R/Slash blames the victim, and give them a buttwhole score op had nothing to do with his wife telling their daughter that she could go so why does he get a buttwhole score makes no sense to me
OP in the. ‘ Gold Digger’ is refreshingly honest .She’s not deceiving anyone and understands that everyone’s choices are their own. Her sisters ARE small minded, AND hypocritical, since they had no problem benefiting from their rich brother in law’s vacation house🤷♀️
if I were the OP in the first story, I'd have hosted the party anyway, and when my friends ask me "hey...uh...why is the cake missing like a quarter of it?" You just tell them the truth. In fairness though, that's just my level of "Done with this nonsense" that I'm at in life, and I get that this wouldn't necessarily work in their situation.
"He went on this tie raid about how I'm an Adult and I did everything myself and I didn't even ask him for anything" Those are supposed to be reasons that justify stealing it?
Hearing Rslash tell a story of him being a normal, decent, even good parent... it makes me smile every time. Especially compared to the stories and my own lack of good examples.
I'm a barista and overheard a couple of customers chatting about lactose intolerance. One said, "I don't want to deal with that shit all day," and I said, "Is that a pun?"
I'm lactose intolerant and a nurse. I can and describe all facets of my gastrointestinal distress in increasingly excruciating detail to anyone who decides to stick their nose in my business like that. Is it a bit much? Sure. But it's the price to pay for butting in. Besides which, even if someone doesn't have a medical reason, if they're not getting the drink for you or forcing it on someone else, then why do you care and what does it matter? If no one is getting hurt and no one is breaking any laws, let people enjoy their lives.
Story 1: 5/5 for everyone other than OP. This is abuse and theft. This is a constant 2 times a year thing at least, if xmas or whatever other similar holiday isn't counted. Story 2: They got a free vacation that they didn't deserve... If you invite yourself, you need to pay for yourself!! Daughter gets 4.5/5, Son in law gets 5/5 since he ain't related! OP is a Chad. Probably why it was their 40th anniversary. Only 2 problems is paying for them in general, and the wife thinking he needs to apologize. WHY SHOULD HE APOLOGIZE WHEN HE GAVE THEM A FREE VACATION!!!?!?!! Story 3: There is more to the marriage. But, either way the OP's family needs to GFTS. 2.5/5 for the sisters, 1/5 for the niece that directly asked about her being a gold digger... Also OP could've been more honest, by saying "it's like we are the best of friends, but not the same as normal couples". Story 4: I do not think this is a real story. I can believe someone thinking it, not aggressive or out loud when they ordered. Dude is pathetic. I'd understand specifically soy-milk, or saying Almond Milk is worse for the environment than a cow. If true, he gets a 1.5/5 since it was more of just embarrassing himself. Story 5: A garage ain't a 14:48 "Guest House"... rSlash is beyond wrong. OP didn't state their parents were shitty over the years or whatever. Parents get 0.2/5, OP gets 4/5.
Agree for that last one. Op could have told them the arrangements when they first discussed it and they could have made an informed choice. Now they've given up their home and realized they got a bait and switch scenario and immediately told to take it or move to a nursing home.
Last story: this reminds me of a news story a few years back when the grandmother of the family lived in the garage and it got so cold that she was rushed to the ER and the son and his wife got charged with neglect and other charges
Framing the story as "living in the garage" make it seem very bad, compared to how it is described in the last line as "a fully furnished, up-to-code guest house".
@@RBrown-uk4xt who knows if its really up to code for living, all we have is the word of the poster. I personally wouldn't let anyone of my family live in a garage no matter how furnished it is. there's a lot of problems when it comes to living in a small space
@@bcatbb2896 Correct, we don't know anything for sure, just the words of OP, Like I said "garage" frames it in a certain way. I have personally seen / stayed in a renovated, detached garage that you could not tell was not originally a guest house, if you had not been told. There is a whole range from sh*tbox to five star. We can only judge based upon the available info, unless you have a reason to disbelieve OP beyond a base claim that they are self biased. OP's grown children being willing / having repeatedly stayed there, leads me to believe it was in good condition.
@@RBrown-uk4xt because that's how much culture is, we dont let family stay in garages regardless of how its renovated. its considered a snub and insult
@@bcatbb2896 Maybe that is your culture. If it is, that is fine. But I doubt that is the case for OP, because again, according to OP, their grown children stayed in the same place multiple times. Are they not family? Was there any mention of complaint or offense from anyone except OP's parents? You seem very stuck on the origin of the housing as a garage, and seem to complete disregard it's current condition. This is like someone *giving* you an excellent condition used car, and complaining because it is "used".
WIFE: You should apologize to Jane just to keep the peace. HUBBY: Jane, I'm sorry I changed our plans so that we could enjoy our anniversary and you had to watch your own kids at a different vacation spot so you couldn't foist them off on us like you usually do. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Coffee story: I usually don't go to Starbucks, but the coffee cafe in my VA Hospital has one, so when I'm done with my appointments, I will usually get my very large iced coffee w/splenda & half-n-half. Last time there was a new barista & she asked "OK, what flavoring?" ME: coffee B: But what flavoring? ME: Nothing extra, just the coffee, cream & splenda. B: 😲
Garages are not always on the ground floor. The Fonzie comment was a reference to Happy Days where the Fonz lived in an apartment above the garage. I grew up in a house with a two story garage. From the context of the parents comment, of not wanting to live like Fonzi it was in the second story of the garage.
I guarantee it's a case of some dude thinking that "young people these days" are soft for drinking milk substitutes or something along those lines. Like if OP was a guy I wouldn't have been surprised to hear the guy utter the words "soy boy"
Fourth story: More and more people tend to openly condemn everything that is new and deviates from the things they know and "have always done that way". We live in strange times.
I love that your daughter's name is Lily, it's such an adorable name. But yes, the fact that a TODDLER understands that if it's someone's birthday, YOU DON'T TAKE THE CAKE FIRST!
Story 2: When my parents went on trips for their anniversaries I had better sense to insert myself and my kids into the romantic trip. Let a married couple have their alone time for goodness sakes.
Story 2: They did set a boundary, wanna know who broke it? The WIFE! "My wife felt bad and let her come". OP set it and his wife and daughter trampled all over it!
Story:5 my grandma literally bought a house with my aunt and her two kids. Grandma took the basement because everything she needed was down there, gave the upstairs to my aunt so she can lots of for my cousins. My grandma is getting old she can’t constantly go up and down stairs all the time
Vacation story..... Jane: "But... but... we were going to take advantage of you and use you for free babysitting! Boohoo!" 😢 Serves the choosing beggars right. OP is NTA at all. Jane is a major AH. 🤨
Maybe the widow in the last story has a stairlift and her parents really want to ride it every day? In all seriousness though, the garage is definitely the safer option for the elderly. At most, the garage would have a few steps leading into the house... So it wouldn't be as physically taxing as a full flight of stairs.
Yall for the last story, either unintentionally or not, the ex-wife quoted Eminem. If you search up “Killshot” by Eminem, a diss track on MGK, he says “I’d rather be 80 year old me than 20 year old you” When i heard the title of that story thats immediately what i thought of lol
Story 3 So, the sisters are perfectly fine with perusing the benefits of op's "gold digging" but not fine with op being a "gold digger." Cute. That's cute.
The fourth story: the thing about all these other kinds of milk also add different FLAVOR depending on what ya want. Ya know, like seasonings? And milk just makes things creamy.
The Vacation story reminded me of a story my stepson used to always tell. This was before I came into the picture. He was about ten and his grandmother promised to take him to Disneyland. Well she ended up taking his twin cousins, and not him. He was miffed about it until the day she died.
1:48 The friend has a point of not cancelling something hours before, that's the point here not that it's wrong to cancel something it's the notice window. I've had plans that were ruined because people decided to simply cancel an hour before, you've already dedicated time to something and potentially cleared your schedule to incorporate them and cancelling because "you feel like it" isn't really a valid excuse that would satisfy somebody in that situation. Yes you can cancel, but there is such a thing as a little consideration if it's short notice. Story 4: Humans are naturally lactose intolerant actually and whether it's good for you or not is honestly debatable. It has things in it that are good for you sure, but the whole package may or may not be. If ANYBODY doesn't consume dairy regularly the bacteria that allows you to process the dairy will die off and then boom you're lactose intolerant since it's entirely dependent on this bacteria to process it. No bacteria = no lactose tolerance. Oat milk whilst not milk it's more of a oat infused water makes more sense to drink. Personally I wouldn't drink either of them, but oat milk makes more sense for humans to drink.
The "married for money" story: I'm 100% sure the sisters hate OP so much not because of a principle thing or anything else, they hate OP purely because OP has money and freedom and seems to be overall pretty happy with her life (in their eyes at least) and they are probably stuck with a not so great financial situation and probably don't even love their husbands all that much (they were what was available at the time)
Yeah like maybe it's a bit of an odd arrangement, but the fact that OP and her husband respect each other and are "like awesome roommates with some benefits" who enjoy each other's company... really doesn't sound that different from a lot of marriages that started more traditionally. I don't know if OP's sisters are unhappy or just very judgy, but this is definitely a situation of their own making.
@@errantwinds-up8uu Yeah, but without the money she wouldn't have gotten married, that's a pretty big difference between traditional marriage and her being a Gold digger.
@@EliEli-eq4zb Actually, I'd argue it's even more like "traditional" marriages in that way. Back when women had to rely on their husbands for financial support, it was very often about the money.
@@cynister7384 They also actually loved their husband, she doesn't love him she loves his money. In a traditional marriage even if the husband was struggling the wife would stay with them. If he fails or is struggling she'll leave him without a second thought.
@@EliEli-eq4zb False. She literally said she loves her husband. She just not *in love* with him. And I find it funny that people are acting like this is some crime against humanity. Both parties wanted this arrangement and are apparently happy with it. This isn't some sketchy woman catfishing a clueless rich guy. 🙄 Seems to be they both have a fair bargain.
Every time I hear a story about a miracle sibling, I just come to wish for the few-years-later update with the parents coming and lamenting about why their child doesn't talk with them anymore.
My parents are in the find out stage right now. Golden sister turned out to be a narc and incredibly disrespectful. Other kids are going low contact.
@@Vixa_Jaz Same here, except it was physical abuse and middle child syndrome.
@@Vixa_JazGolden children are almost always entitled narcissistic monsters.
@@grachisol8236 Happy for you?
@@grachisol8236 I said "almost". I am glad to hear that your parents are fair.
I wouldn't have cancelled the birthday party. I would've made sure EVERY SINGLE PERSON saw the cake with a huge chunk out of it and told EVERY SINGLE PERSON why there was a huge chunk taken out of it.
Absolutely this. Shame them in front of people they can't just ignore or keep quiet.
Why? Don't the guests as well as the birthday person deserve to have a "virgin" birthday cake that hasn't been touched yet? This is like a king deciding to bed somebody else's wife right before the man even has the chance to take her maidenhood.
By OP canceling her party, her sister won again. As you said display that cake with the missing slice and humiliate parents and sister when asked.
Yeah, I’d be 100% passive aggressive
@@lorilancaster5917 it would have been a loss either way, possibly. I would have gotten severely punished for stating those facts as they think it's "talking back" or "insolence".
The "gold digger" story, of COURSE the hypocrites were glad to use the husband's resources for themselves lol
Yeah, I think the sisters are mostly jealous that OP has a happy marriage to someone she loves AND financial security. Otherwise, why are they constantly talking about OP's marriage? Obviously the nieces only approached OP because their moms had been trash talking OP to them.
Yeah, it's fun watching them scorn her for using someone for their money...while using HER for his money.
And they are mad at OP for answering their kids questions honestly. They wouldn’t ask those questions if they would keep their mouth shut about OPs marriage. Its like they were planning on using their kids to try and guilt trip OP. OPs and spouse’s relationship is between them.
@@lorilancaster5917and the whole "You're manipulating them because you're miserable!" is just pure projection. Everything op has said demonstrates shes happy yet who is consistently bitter, angry and picking fights? Typically it's only miserable people who act like this.
That's the key right there. OP is clearly far from miserable, in fact due to open, honest communication she has a much healthier relationship than most do.Granted, it is VERY non-traditional (well, for a certain definition of marriage at least) but as long s it's two consenting adults not hurting anyone, each other, or themselves it sounds like an awesome pairing.
Story 1: So let me get this straight. Op's parents continually favor the little sister over Op, and haven't celebrated their birthday in _ages_ because they're always "too broke", so Op works hard to make enough of _their own money_ so that they can finally have a party of their own, spent all of _their_ hard earned money to buy everything for it, only for the parents to take a slice from the cake that _Op, not them, Op_ paid for which can technically count as theft (not enough for police to care but theft nonetheless) causing Op to have to cancel because they couldn't trust them to not ruin anything else but also couldn't afford to move it somewhere else...
_And the "friend" thinks Op is overreacting?_
Let the friend have the party for OP's sister ... Dofuus ...
If OP's parents are too broke, OP should look into getting gifts for himself. I would start by gifting himself an apartment. Couple that with the satisfaction of leaving a "Fuck you" note to your parents as your only departure notice.
@@ShadowTaipanyessss!
I wouldn't blame OP if OP decides to "unfriend" the friend for thinking that way. That was NOT an "overreaction", that was appropriate for the situation at hand. Maybe OP's friend is guilty of underreacting.
I've experienced almost this growing up. When I had cried to my friends about the situations, they listened, but it was in one ear and out the other. As an adult I realized they probably didn't understand the gravity of the situation- they grew up with loving parents, and didn't experience the constant abuse, neglect, etc, so they didn't understand the toxicity of my parents.
Im so glad you pointed out that the OP3's nieces only asked about her being a gold digger bc HER SISTERS WERE TELLING THEIR DAUGHTERS THAT SHE’S A GOLD DIGGER, then getting pissy when she confirmed it fairly gracefully. They're literally just mad that she's not ashamed of it lol
Oh, they are also big mad that OP is living her best life with no financial worries!
They're probably also jealous of OP because she doesn't have to work. 🙄
It's almost like they wanted to play heroes to her.
Oh they definitely want her to be ashamed of herself! Cause being a gold digger is usually frowned upon, so in their minds, if op isn't ashamed of it, then there's something wrong with her, and she didn't need to be influencing the nieces that being a gold digger is ok.
It's like people who are homophobic. They think people who are gay or trans have something mentally wrong with them, because they are not what the majority of what society grew up thinking of as normal, so that makes them screwed up somehow, when they're just living their lives, and not anyone else's business, lol.
Yup, because her readily admitting it is her also admitting that she's not as miserable as her sisters are telling everyone. Which means they're pissed because they *are* miserable and were using this as a means to make themselves feel better, which obviously fell a part when it turned out she's actually happy with her arrangements lol.
Story 2:
OP DID try to set boundaries
It was their wife that let Jane stomp all over their boundaries
Rslash really needs to curb the weird thing he has where the wife doing something is the husband's fault
@BeefMeisterSupreme 100% agree. He's such a simp that it makes me cringe
RSlash may just be the most prepared for raising baby Lily to NOT be entitled and not be an entitled parent!
That story of Lily giving the slice of birthday cake to her grandma is so precious!!!
Dabney may have bad takes, but I think he's a great father! :)
Yeah, the thing with most kids is, they WANT other people to be happy. So if you explain to them in a calm and simple way that something makes people unhappy, they'll generally stop doing it.
It's also very important to teach children that they cannot always get what they want.
The crazy thing is, it's very easy to teach that without beatings or other forms of abuse, simply through honest, direct communication.
NOT teaching them this one critical fact can ruin them forever, because the first time they come up against the world outside their bubble of enablers, they'll be completely unprepared for the concept of "no".
@Nerobyrne the little kid I mind is a terror a lot of the time but if you say you're sick she hugs you and is quiet because she's been sick and she knows how much it SUCKS
@@your_local_questerianagree 😸
Well, I’m not sure he necessarily had to. Maybe she wanted to know when they could eat cake and they were just telling her the rules
the comical thing about story 3 is that i guarantee the reason op's nieces/nephews were so curious and fascinated over her being in the marriage of convenience is because of how much her siblings hate it and how much they condemn her choices in private. if the siblings didn't condemn it as much than i bet the children wouldn't have really cared or at least didn't have as much fascination over it
Right. They call her a gold digger but gold diggers pretend to have feelings in order to get the benefits. While OP and her husband are in an honest HEALTHY relationship. It sounds like there’s no deceit happening here. Kudos to both of them. They’re happy the way things are.
@@stevenandcarminabeedle9089exactly my thoughts. By oure blunt af definition, yeah op might be counted as a golddigger. But by common sense it is just a marriage of convience and friends with benefits. Honestly the 'golddigger' claim kinda goes out the window with both op and her husband knowing what the agreement was beforehand.
Anniversary story: I absolutely knew that OP’s daughter would want them to babysit the grandkids. When it was OP’s and his wife’s anniversary vacation. 🙄🙄🙄 Talk about entitlement and spoiled. Sure, switching the tickets last minute was cowardly, but I understand where OP was coming from. I agree with RSlash that they should have both stood firm from the start, but still give them 0/5 buttholes.
Except OP did, while his wife eventually gave in.
@@cardinalchaos2278 Agreed.
I think the wife deserves a higher butthole score. It was apparent that wife was favouring and spoiling the daughter, and so raising the daughter to be an entitled butthole. At some point, they'll wonder why the sons go LC or NC with them.
Yeah, that should have been a hard no from the start. Also, the daughter and her husband are entitled jerks for even asking to go along. wtaf?
@@cardinalchaos2278she seems to have no problems making him the bad guy. I’m curious how their other children feel about Jane forcing herself on her parents anniversary trip?
For sure. OP should not feel guilty. He said the wife has a hard time saying no. If she felt entitled to invite herself and her family, expect them to pay, AND babysit she clearly has never heard the word no. Let this be a lesson. I hope they enjoyed their huge anniversary occasion to celebrate!
Story 3: So OP is “completely inappropriate” for confirming everything her sisters said about her? Not the sisters for saying those things and teaching them to their daughters in the first place?
Exactly, and then wanting to stay at the man's house who makes all that money that sisters are so against smh.
Here's what I don't get about "miracle babies" and their overlooked siblings. In the bulk of these stories, kids who are deemed "miracle babies" usually happen after a long stretch of reproductive failure, and the neglected siblings are usually the oldest. Wouldn't the oldest kid also be a "miracle baby" for being the result of, presumably, the first try between parents who are found to struggle with fertility issues or miscarriages?
Exactly
it's like parents who have 'miracle children' as second (or any other number child) forget that they even have other children. 🙄🙄
I can understand having ONE SINGLE CHILD and never being able to have another ever again being a miracle, but it's still scummy to raise that child on a pedestal. for every set of parents that make a huge deal out of a rainbow baby there are probably 50 others that don't do that, or 100 others that can never have a child no matter how much they try or WHAT they try.
This is a variant of the suspension bridge affect.
@@jordanmchighlander9365 what's that? I'm not familiar. (I know I could look it up bur it's nice to engage sometimes)
The dude complaining about milk in coffee was probably a case of him thinking that not drinking milk was somehow proof of "this generation being soft"
Right. Bet this dude is also always screaming about his 'freedom' while sticking his nose in other people's business. 😂😂
Yeah. Because "Frufru" means gay basically so he called plant based milk gay bs. And we know that for these people gay=weak=bad. The usual case of fragile masculinity
And that only real men drink straight whiskey and black coffee. I also wonder if this guy thinks that food allergies are a myth.
It’s fear. In his day “no one” drank anything other than cow milk. So the fact people are seemingly doing things differently more and more than he’s used to, it scares him. Otherwise he wouldn’t be so angry about what other people drink and so entitled to be vocal about it when it’s none of his business. I think OP was absolutely appropriate. I mean he asked if it would kill them. OP answered.
Our daughter is severely ALLERGIC to all dairy products, not lactose intolerant. Allergic. She has an epi pen for it. What does he care what other’s drink anyhow? Mind your business mate! Does he get so vocal at restaurants and what people order? Nutter
Story 3: honestly, I wouldn’t classify it as “gold-digging” if both people agree to it as an arrangement they’re both comfortable with. Throughout history, most marriages were more about survival than actual love. Nothing illegal here.
The nieces are rather naturally curious about it all. They get a zero score because it’s not wrong just to ask the question, and they weren’t pestering OP, she just answered no problem. Sounds like a very healthy auntie-niece relationship.
Hearing RSlash gush over his daughter is very sweet ❤️
Even two year olds can understand how birthdays work.
I agree. :3
Two year olds can even understand it's not appropriate for a whole class of sophomores to be acting like the high school concert band is the time to act like we're at the football game. XD
I know, it's so adorable.
I worked at a day care until covid. I saw every kid enjoy other kids bday. But several of the parents have often complained about how terrible their kids behavior was at bdays and were SHOCKED that their kid was fine. Sure, a full party is a bit different but those parents also used to be the ones who would want everyone to bend over backwards to keep their kid happy at the expense of others.
(Full disclosure, I was told that as a child my sis and I were little shits at each others partys for a while but no one else's. Sibling things lol)
Not only is OP right for cancelling the party, they should be preparing to move out and go no contact with that toxic family.
I don’t know how old OP is but she’s not too young for an exit strategy. But I don’t think she should’ve canceled the party. Parents and sister win again.
@@lorilancaster5917 If she cancels the party, moves out, and goes no contact, it will literally be the last time her "family" ever wins.
@@winterfire567but we don’t know how old she is and what further bs is in store. We just know her younger sister is 11.
@@lorilancaster5917she might be 15+ since she can earn her own money
I hate the idea of “grit your teeth and bare it”
The thing with the "gold digger" story that OP should point out to the young (she didn't mention she did) is that her relationship is consensual on both sides. It's ok if both agree to marry because of money, but usually gold diggers trick the husband pretending to love for the money, which is not a healthy relationship
She DID tell the first one who asked for advice only do it if it's all positive and not negative, but yh, she should put emphasis on that to all of them.
And it's also a marriage of convenience for OP's husband, since his parents wanted a certain type (presumably traditional/religious?) of wife for him. I think OP even said that her husband gets the advantage of "not being cut out of the money" or something like that
Last story - OP's parents thought that OP will take care of them. They wouldn't have to walk downstairs for a dinner, she would bring it to them.
OP could’ve given them a head up but who wouldn’t prefer having their own apartment for free instead of a room? Apparently OPs parents since they may have hoped to take over her entire place
Came here to say this. My grand parents are this way for the last five years. Visiting them is not about spending time together, it's about doing house repair, chores, and cooking for them.
I doubt they thought that.
@@lorilancaster5917I just can't believe they had no discussion about this in advance. Who does that?
On the "Parent's Choice" story -- it's clear what's happening. The parents are upset because if they have their own space, they have to CLEAN their own space. If they have their own kitchen, they have to cook their own meals, etc., etc. They thought they were moving in to the guest room to be GUESTS and have OP wait on them hand and foot.
And OP knew that and acted accordingly. Especially if they work from home. Nothing wrong with that. They’re close enough for care or emergencies but separate enough for privacy. Win win.
If I find out that you're hosting a barbecue steak party and ask to be invited.
Then when I show up you give me a grilled cheese sandwich, and tell me that steak is for everyone else and not me.
I'm going to be pissed at you.
Op is absolutely the butthole for not making it clear in the beginning what his parents accommodations were going to be.
Story 1: Screw Miracle Babies.
They just give people an excuse to create a child like Angelica Pickles.
😂😂😂
100% agreed!
Angelica was better behaved.
Agreed! No one a real life Angelica Pickles! At least, if I remember right, Angelica became better behaved
My brother is kinda a miracle child. Not a monster like these psychos though
More like Veruca Salt.
Story 1 : NTA.. i heard this story before.. Those "parents" are the true monsters.. anyone who treats one kid different from the other is a POS and deserves to be publicly shamed....Drop that friend then tell them " this is not an overreaction your no longer a friend bye felicia "..
Story 2 : NTA.. jane just wanted a free gateway and babysitting.. op finally found a freaking backbone and made his wife find a backbone and telling a freaking adult a backbone.. "she still doesn't like how jane is mad at us and wants me to apologize" you 2 Finally find a backbone and she wants you to apologize..apologize for what exactly for finally saying no ?? Apologize for the wife decades of awful parenting which lead to jane being a super entitled dweeb who thinks the world is about her??
Story 3 : NTA.. The young adults asked questions and op answered ..theyre no longer 4 or 5 so she doesnt need to lie to them.. op sisters are complete grunts and op need to start limiting contact with those bitter jerks.. op should still go just with her husband and take pictures of the house and post it all over social media with " hmmm fun place" and then pictures with her husband and caption that with " he doesnt judge me for being me thats real family" and watch the crap storm ensue..
Story 4 : NTA..The guy is a nosey POS who needs to mind his own damn business..newsflash bruhh no one cares what you think is real whats fake people have enough problems then to deal with your adult tempertantrums and BS..
Story 5 : NTA.. your house your rules ..They dont like it they can get a hotel or go to a nursing home..
Ikr? The friend is in a way telling him to suck it up and favouritism is not that bad. Like c'mon! OP gritted his teeth for far too long!
@@dracko158" grit your teeth" means " sucks to suck loser its not me being abused its you so take it and be happy"...
Of course his friend says that because HE wasn't the one getting abused. How about HE swap places with OP then? Then maybe he can see how bad favouritism is.
@@dracko158 they'll never do that because they're probably entitled a holes as well... there's a saying " hard times shows who your true friends and the real phonies are" so that"friend" couldn't be a bigger phony...
Last story about the elderly parents being put in the converted garage to live... I find it hard to believe that this plan wasn't mentioned to the parents at least once (or, better, several times) in the planning stage for the move.
I've got to agree with you. As I was listening to the story, I was was also wondering how this wouldn't have been discussed before the parents sold off their home and moved in. I can understand how the parents might feel tricked when they thought they would be living inside the home.
I’m under the belief that the garage was mentioned several times and the parents dismissed OP because they assumed OP was not serious.
If they don’t like it (like OP said) there are nursing homes, retirement communities, assisted living facilities, motels, hotels, and holiday inns.
Oh 100% guaranteed the barista from story 4 went to the back and shared the shit out of that story. It probably made them laugh the rest of their shift.
I wish someone had done that when I worked at sbucks. People getting offended over OTHER people's drinks was more common than I thought it would be
I've literally witnessed people go into Starbucks before and LOUDLY order the strongest and blackest coffee they could while looking around smugly so I'm not at all surprised by that story.
And yes, as someone who worked retail for a couple decades, we DEFINITELY gossip about customers amongst ourselves in the retail and service industry
I've had a similar situation at a store when I was getting almond milk. Some guy told me it wasn't real milk and I told him it was the closest thing to real milk I could drink. He then said kids these days. I turned to expect to see some 50 or 60 yr old instead he was early 30s. I kind of laughed and said, you're what like 30, and he said "I'm older than you." I then replied with when I was younger, they taught us to respect our elders and if we had nothing nice to say don't say nothing at all, and apparently you never got that lesson, also I'm in my late 30s. I basically told him not to pop off at the mouth to people he don't know, his next interaction might not be so friendly. I've seen him in the same store a few times but he don't say nothing, I'll get a nod here and there but that's it.
@@TomDarkwulf87i hope OP made their day! What small, sad, and insecure men to loudly order what they think is the manliest drink. I’m sure it’s also funny, but gets really old really quickly.
@@drwboy07not real milk? Maybe he’s not a real man.
@@stevenandcarminabeedle9089 The story kinda reminds me of that one scene in Napoleon Dynamite(I think it was something along the lines of "You're drinking 1%, is that because you think you're fat? because if not you could be drinking whole" or something to that effect.)
Got to love it when rslash turns into dadslash and raves about his family. It's so wholesome.
@tomaibetter I agree. Rslash is just the type to give life lessons to relate why his scores are they way they are. Because he has a family himself, and that's why I love his videos. 🥂 I'll drink to that!
For the first story I'm reminded of another story where op's younger sibling was a miracle child and got op's 10th through 18th birthdays highjacked (among other things). The 18th sent op over the edge and told relatives over how op's life got constantly screwed up or ignored by op's parents and sibling (raised by narcissists). Probably while still a sobbing mess. The family all nearly instantly turned on the parents and sibling and got them blacklisted from everything family related. At first the parents were pissed at op, then sobbing themselves from the backlash and eventualy trying to mend things with op (good luck trying to mend 8 years of someone's life) and sent op's sibling to a boarding school much to their own distaste for the idea.
Hey, iirc Rslash actually read that or before!
Came across an update to that one. Sister is no longer in a boarding school, she's in a psych ward.
@@asmith8692
Oh God she got worse...
@@asmith8692 welp... That took a turn
Mark Narrations has read the update to that story in his latest video.
Story 2: Never apologize to keep the peace. That just teaches them that they can get away with whatever stuff they've been doing.
First Story, NTA: Dealing with blatant favoritism and theft is a valid reason to cancel a party. OP needs to look into moving out because this behavior isn’t going to stop. OP's sister is going to grow up being a brat that no one will like to be around
Second Story, NTA: Jane basically wanted to hijack OP and his wife's anniversary vacation. OP did the right thing in my opinion because it seems like Jane was never told "no" before and it kinda seems like OP's wife is to blame for that. So what if she is the only daughter and youngest, she should be told "no" like anyone else. Jane isn’t entitled to a free vacation. The thing is, Rslash OP did put his foot down and said no but OP's wife wouldn't
Third Story, NTA: I personally think that OP's marriage is bothering from both sides (her's and her husband's reasons) but its their life and I don’t judge. That said, OP's sisters can’t disrespect and ridicule OP for her reasonings for marrying her husband and just expect them to still use the summer house for the vacation. This is a cut and clear case of actions have consequences
Fourth Story, NTA: This guy wants to get into people's business...over milk so he got (in detail) why OP can’t drink milk. Instead of assuming that everyone can drink milk and not judge people who don’t drink regular milk, maybe this guy should realize that not everyone can stomach regular milk
Fifth Story, NTA: I’d rather live in a fully fournished garage than in a nursing home if I was OP's parents, on top of the fact that they would be living there rent free and have the freedom to do whatever they want
Where's the rest? Oh yeah it's the annoying edits
@@buddyburrowsoh look my fan. Be sure to like my comment
You probably meant furnished.
@@buddyburrowshush if you don't know how this person types their verdicts.
Third story: Why is it bothering? 2 consent adults decided to have a relationship that is convenient to them, dont understand why it is bothering
Story 3: So.. OP is living her best life. Super happy. Her and her husband are HAPPY with their life choices and everything is fine. And the sisters have an issue and call her a gold digger and say that her life is "fucked up"? Seems like her life is far better than theirs if they're being so bitter lmao. Guess they're scared of their children following her footsteps and living happier lives than them.
When RSlash starts talking about his daughter and how he’s teaching her about how to behave at other people’s birthdays. When he mentioned that Lily gave her grandmother the first slice of birthday cake as it was her grandma’s birthday was really touching! How sweet!
LOL, "Yes I can drink real milk, but I don't want to poop my pants. Thank you" not uncalled for at all. love these stories,
Indeed. The guy literally asked.
Don't ask Don't tell 😂
Story 4: By flipping out over how someone wants their coffee, and peacocking his choice, he might as well be screaming "I have a tiny penis!"
"And I have to use a pair of Channel Lock pliers to find it."
@@BIGBLOCK5022006 Or lots of magnifying glasses.
That guy throwing a fit over the milk substitutes in the coffee shop probably went home later to complain about how soft and offended the younger generation get.
Last story: Plus privacy, they live with OP but can have a space were they don't need to worry about each other bothering each other.
First story...I think OP should return the favor and have a slice of sister's cake the day before. After all, who will notice?
Did that story mention Opie's age? I don't think it did.... the father called them an adult but that doesn't mean they actually are 18 or older.
Story 2: I'm more upset with the wife because OP said no, she went over him to invest them, although he could please put down harder. Literally the a hole here is the spoiled daughter who couldn't care less that she was taking away her parents 40th anniversary. You owe her no apology and people like this always come back when they want something, so don't chase after her when she calls you asking for more free stuff tell her you are not her personal piggy bank/ child care / whatever else she thinks she can force you into.
The fact that the wife wasn't upset about the last minute change, meant she was relieved
Exactly. I’m glad OP stuck up for both of them. Maybe that will help her stand up for herself next time her daughter tries to impose. Because there will be a next time.
The first story reminds me of that /r/EntitledChildren post where the OP lost all of their birthdays to their "miracle" baby sister for 8 years, until they finally blew up at their 18th birthday, which was being held at a Chuck E. Cheese-like establishment. The entire family had been blinded to it until the blow up, abruptly apologized, and ganged up on the parents, who tried to come up with excuses, but dug themselves deeper. The grandfather gave OP a used car, which the bratty sister damaged with a hammer.
And there were some people that think that story was fake because of age and something else. Except "parents" really do that to they kids in term of a golden child. And the results be on them much later. So, could wish is fake but people do that for real
I was thinking about that story too. It's shocking but unfortunately completely believable to me.
I think I remember after that, the parents realized what monster they created and sent her to boarding school.
rSlash actually covered that story I think
@@iPLAYtheSTATIONinstead of you know, trying to be better parents. To both their children.
Story 3: I have this personal idiom of mine i think fits here.
Whats wrong with being weird as long as youre not hurting anyone?
Its not exactly what youd expect from a marriage but as long as the Husband and Wife are happy/content with the situation, then wtf is the problem?
Im also on the NTA train just in case.
Story 2 - They will get over it when the daughter needs free babysitting. I swear, to invite yourself on an anniversary trip for a free vacation and you damn well know, they ain't gonna do any parenting on that trip and force it all on OP and his wife.
I love to hear the little stories of Dabney life. I've been listening long enough to hear puppy bloopers, I'm going to be a dad, and now cute toddler stories. Much needed amongst all the crazy from reddit. Thanks Rslash. 😊
The guy at the coffee shop thinks hes the main character, so treating him as anything other than stunning and brave for defending dairy wasnt what he prepared for.
Round of applause for rSlash that he’s taking the steps to _not_ contribute to the entitled child population.
Story 1: And this is why there really should be a "sibling fairness" law. Seriously, what's the holdup?
Story 2: If Jane and her husband had wanted a vacation from parenting, they should have left their kids with a traditional babysitter. You know, at home.
With the 40th anniversary trip story, with the adult daughter (husband and childern) asking to go as well. As soon as OP and his wife agreed, I was figuring that they would be used as baby sitters while everyone was on the trip. But when OP stated that he and his wife paid for the grandkids tickets, with the understanding that the daughter and husband would pay for their own. I had the thought that the daughter and husband would show up at airport with the grandkids. Then tell OP and his wife something like... "we didn't buy tickets for ourselves and plan to stay home, here are the kids.... bye". Then quickly leave the airport.
Honestly props to OP in the vacation scary, the fact that they had an arrangement and it wasn't one sided or anything is very respectable.
Story 1: Ahhh yes, yet ANOTHER story where in a few years, the awful parents will have to deal with the bratty golden child and will wonder why Op doesnt speak with them when they “always tried to make things even”.
NTA Op, you poor thing.
Rslash bragging about his daughter is so cute and makes me quite jealous that I don't have a dad like him
Story 1: here’s an idea for revenge, when it is the sister birthday take a slice of cake the night before and if they get upset say that they let her take a slice of cake. Also recorded the reaction and if your in trouble blasting that recording all over
Story 5: It's pretty convenient for everything they need to be in one place, so what's the problem?
I myself would be thrilled, no stairs to use and everything on ground floor and arm's reach, so I'd consider this a win.
I think it's a mix of not thinking that the garage is a "proper" part of the hourse plus feeling like they're being left in a smal shack, as well as a feeling entitled to living in the "good" rooms, because they're OP's parents.
I suspect the parents were planning to move in the main house and have OP handle all of the shopping, cooking, and household chores for them too.
In the garage the parents would still be responsible for their own housework and less able to coerce OP into doing all of the chores for them.
@@survivedandthriving That was immediately my thought. They wanted a live in servant, not independence at no cost.
Story 2 nta I heard this one before as well.Its your anniversary trip and she wanted to turn it into her personal trip while you watch your grandchildren.
4th story: The guy really sounds like he's been worked up over culture war stuff. No real evidence, but that's the impression I get.
Story 3;
So they're going to sit there and rip you to shreds about being a golddigger, all while holding their hands out expecting you to share the gold you dug?
Don't bite the hand that feeds. NTA
In the office I used to work in, a real nudzh decided that we would all go plant based for milk.
The kitchen area supplies are paid for by the office. She ran a campaign of pestering everyone until they switched. I said fine and I'll just buy my own milk. No, this nutcase dumped out my milk and informed me ‘We are a plant based office now.’
I complained to HR and just bought another carton, she dumped that out too but this time replaced it with a nut milk, after noticing the nasty taste I immediately projectile vomited which probably saved me a lot of bother. Within a minute a rash started spreading all over my face then chest then arms.
I was rushed to the regional hospital thankfully less than half a kilometer away, I arrived right as my throat was starting to close.
It gets stupider. I was given a very forced half-hearted apology where she spent most of the time decrying the evils of dairy. Less than a week later she was fired after replacing my milk with oat milk. I’m also mildly allergic to oats. I should have had her arrested.
Story 1:
I bet those parents are gonna end up on OPs door step in 10 years telling him to give his sister his house ^.^
And OP will probably tell them to go flake off (politely put) with their "golden child".
Do it for Dan.
@@YourPal1 "I HATE DAN!"
@@YourPal1I remember that story! :)
Last Story: OP is within her right to choose the room that her parants will stay in, and OP's parants should be more greatful. However, OP is showing that her parants are a low prority to her. OP's dogs get a bedroom to themselfs, but OP's parants have to sleep in the gararge? Could she not rearange a room to accomidate the parants?
In terms of the last story, my grandmother actually got workers years ago to convert her garage into a master bedroom with a sizable bath. And we barely talk about the fact it used to be the garage. The only signs of it being the garage is the garage doors that have been closed off by a wall from the inside, but on the outside, the garage doors are still there.
About the last story - they are just confused by the fact the guesthouse used to be a garage. You know, what people usually use garages for (aside from sheltering their vehicles)? Storing stuff they don't need. I'm pretty sure that's why they make a fuss, they are reading this as being compared to a useless junk.
So Jane heard about your special romantic trip, invites herself, and plans to dump the kids on you so she could have a romantic trip? That’s just selfish
Story 3: The sister should not be telling the niece these things if they don't want the niece to ask OP about them. NTA
I love how it’s OP who’s apparently miserable and not the people complaining about a woman’s marriage. Sounds like the sisters are jealous
I hate when R/Slash blames the victim, and give them a buttwhole score op had nothing to do with his wife telling their daughter that she could go so why does he get a buttwhole score makes no sense to me
Rslash: "Number one my daughter is amazing!" I loved this lol
OP in the. ‘ Gold Digger’ is refreshingly honest .She’s not deceiving anyone and understands that everyone’s choices are their own. Her sisters ARE small minded, AND hypocritical, since they had no problem benefiting from their rich brother in law’s vacation house🤷♀️
if I were the OP in the first story, I'd have hosted the party anyway, and when my friends ask me "hey...uh...why is the cake missing like a quarter of it?" You just tell them the truth. In fairness though, that's just my level of "Done with this nonsense" that I'm at in life, and I get that this wouldn't necessarily work in their situation.
Story 3: your sisters are just jealous that you are happy in your unusual arrangement lol
"He went on this tie raid about how I'm an Adult and I did everything myself and I didn't even ask him for anything"
Those are supposed to be reasons that justify stealing it?
Story 3: OP is a rock solid NTA and her sisters are MAD JEALOUS that it's working for her.
Hearing Rslash tell a story of him being a normal, decent, even good parent... it makes me smile every time. Especially compared to the stories and my own lack of good examples.
I love hearing Dabney talk about Lily. "She's amazing". It heals my poorly parented heart ❤.
💜
I'm a barista and overheard a couple of customers chatting about lactose intolerance. One said, "I don't want to deal with that shit all day," and I said, "Is that a pun?"
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Man, I love the Rslash personal stories. It just makes the channel better
I'm lactose intolerant and a nurse. I can and describe all facets of my gastrointestinal distress in increasingly excruciating detail to anyone who decides to stick their nose in my business like that. Is it a bit much? Sure. But it's the price to pay for butting in.
Besides which, even if someone doesn't have a medical reason, if they're not getting the drink for you or forcing it on someone else, then why do you care and what does it matter? If no one is getting hurt and no one is breaking any laws, let people enjoy their lives.
The daughter in the second story is lucky enough that her dad paid for her kids to go on vacation. Nta.
Story 1: 5/5 for everyone other than OP. This is abuse and theft. This is a constant 2 times a year thing at least, if xmas or whatever other similar holiday isn't counted.
Story 2: They got a free vacation that they didn't deserve... If you invite yourself, you need to pay for yourself!! Daughter gets 4.5/5, Son in law gets 5/5 since he ain't related!
OP is a Chad. Probably why it was their 40th anniversary. Only 2 problems is paying for them in general, and the wife thinking he needs to apologize.
WHY SHOULD HE APOLOGIZE WHEN HE GAVE THEM A FREE VACATION!!!?!?!!
Story 3: There is more to the marriage. But, either way the OP's family needs to GFTS. 2.5/5 for the sisters, 1/5 for the niece that directly asked about her being a gold digger...
Also OP could've been more honest, by saying "it's like we are the best of friends, but not the same as normal couples".
Story 4: I do not think this is a real story. I can believe someone thinking it, not aggressive or out loud when they ordered. Dude is pathetic.
I'd understand specifically soy-milk, or saying Almond Milk is worse for the environment than a cow. If true, he gets a 1.5/5 since it was more of just embarrassing himself.
Story 5: A garage ain't a 14:48 "Guest House"... rSlash is beyond wrong. OP didn't state their parents were shitty over the years or whatever. Parents get 0.2/5, OP gets 4/5.
Agree for that last one. Op could have told them the arrangements when they first discussed it and they could have made an informed choice. Now they've given up their home and realized they got a bait and switch scenario and immediately told to take it or move to a nursing home.
Am I the only one who loves when rSlash starts bragging about his family?
No, it's so sweet!
I like it, yet also become jealous at the same time. He has the only thing I always wanted but never will.....children.
@@clarky23 why not?
As someone who prefers milk, the dude who was so angry about the milk is confusing, like who tf gets so angry abt milk
The casual brag about your daughter is so damn adorable Rslash. It sounds like you're just loving dad life and I am here for it :3
Last Story: rSlash, buddy. Not everyone lives in a two-storey house. Some people's houses are all on one floor!
Last story: this reminds me of a news story a few years back when the grandmother of the family lived in the garage and it got so cold that she was rushed to the ER and the son and his wife got charged with neglect and other charges
Framing the story as "living in the garage" make it seem very bad, compared to how it is described in the last line as "a fully furnished, up-to-code guest house".
@@RBrown-uk4xt who knows if its really up to code for living, all we have is the word of the poster. I personally wouldn't let anyone of my family live in a garage no matter how furnished it is. there's a lot of problems when it comes to living in a small space
@@bcatbb2896 Correct, we don't know anything for sure, just the words of OP, Like I said "garage" frames it in a certain way. I have personally seen / stayed in a renovated, detached garage that you could not tell was not originally a guest house, if you had not been told. There is a whole range from sh*tbox to five star. We can only judge based upon the available info, unless you have a reason to disbelieve OP beyond a base claim that they are self biased. OP's grown children being willing / having repeatedly stayed there, leads me to believe it was in good condition.
@@RBrown-uk4xt because that's how much culture is, we dont let family stay in garages regardless of how its renovated. its considered a snub and insult
@@bcatbb2896 Maybe that is your culture. If it is, that is fine. But I doubt that is the case for OP, because again, according to OP, their grown children stayed in the same place multiple times. Are they not family? Was there any mention of complaint or offense from anyone except OP's parents? You seem very stuck on the origin of the housing as a garage, and seem to complete disregard it's current condition. This is like someone *giving* you an excellent condition used car, and complaining because it is "used".
WIFE: You should apologize to Jane just to keep the peace.
HUBBY: Jane, I'm sorry I changed our plans so that we could enjoy our anniversary and you had to watch your own kids at a different vacation spot so you couldn't foist them off on us like you usually do.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Coffee story: I usually don't go to Starbucks, but the coffee cafe in my VA Hospital has one, so when I'm done with my appointments, I will usually get my very large iced coffee w/splenda & half-n-half. Last time there was a new barista & she asked "OK, what flavoring?" ME: coffee B: But what flavoring? ME: Nothing extra, just the coffee, cream & splenda. B: 😲
Of course your daughter is amazing! ❤❤You're an amazing father too Dabney!
Garages are not always on the ground floor. The Fonzie comment was a reference to Happy Days where the Fonz lived in an apartment above the garage. I grew up in a house with a two story garage. From the context of the parents comment, of not wanting to live like Fonzi it was in the second story of the garage.
Just hearing Rslash talk about his daughter is like damn adorable. He is clearly a really proud dad xD
"I'm telling this story to illustrate that n.1 my daughter is amazing..." spoken like a true proud dad and we love to hear that!
Story 4: Why would you care, or even listen to, what type of milk other people are ordering in their coffee?
I guarantee it's a case of some dude thinking that "young people these days" are soft for drinking milk substitutes or something along those lines. Like if OP was a guy I wouldn't have been surprised to hear the guy utter the words "soy boy"
Exactly. And then comment on it to the person lol
Fourth story: More and more people tend to openly condemn everything that is new and deviates from the things they know and "have always done that way". We live in strange times.
there is something about a dad bragging about their kid that makes me smile.
I love that your daughter's name is Lily, it's such an adorable name. But yes, the fact that a TODDLER understands that if it's someone's birthday, YOU DON'T TAKE THE CAKE FIRST!
Story 2: When my parents went on trips for their anniversaries I had better sense to insert myself and my kids into the romantic trip. Let a married couple have their alone time for goodness sakes.
Last story: It's very hard to make your kid do everything for you when they can lock you out.
Story 2: They did set a boundary, wanna know who broke it? The WIFE! "My wife felt bad and let her come". OP set it and his wife and daughter trampled all over it!
Story:5 my grandma literally bought a house with my aunt and her two kids. Grandma took the basement because everything she needed was down there, gave the upstairs to my aunt so she can lots of for my cousins. My grandma is getting old she can’t constantly go up and down stairs all the time
Vacation story..... Jane: "But... but... we were going to take advantage of you and use you for free babysitting! Boohoo!" 😢
Serves the choosing beggars right. OP is NTA at all. Jane is a major AH. 🤨
Maybe the widow in the last story has a stairlift and her parents really want to ride it every day?
In all seriousness though, the garage is definitely the safer option for the elderly. At most, the garage would have a few steps leading into the house... So it wouldn't be as physically taxing as a full flight of stairs.
As upsetting as the first story was, hearing rslash gush about how awesome his daughter is was so cute and wholesome ❤
Yall for the last story, either unintentionally or not, the ex-wife quoted Eminem. If you search up “Killshot” by Eminem, a diss track on MGK, he says “I’d rather be 80 year old me than 20 year old you” When i heard the title of that story thats immediately what i thought of lol
Story 3 So, the sisters are perfectly fine with perusing the benefits of op's "gold digging" but not fine with op being a "gold digger."
Cute. That's cute.
The fourth story: the thing about all these other kinds of milk also add different FLAVOR depending on what ya want. Ya know, like seasonings? And milk just makes things creamy.
The Vacation story reminded me of a story my stepson used to always tell. This was before I came into the picture. He was about ten and his grandmother promised to take him to Disneyland.
Well she ended up taking his twin cousins, and not him. He was miffed about it until the day she died.
Poor thing... 😢
1:48 The friend has a point of not cancelling something hours before, that's the point here not that it's wrong to cancel something it's the notice window. I've had plans that were ruined because people decided to simply cancel an hour before, you've already dedicated time to something and potentially cleared your schedule to incorporate them and cancelling because "you feel like it" isn't really a valid excuse that would satisfy somebody in that situation. Yes you can cancel, but there is such a thing as a little consideration if it's short notice.
Story 4: Humans are naturally lactose intolerant actually and whether it's good for you or not is honestly debatable. It has things in it that are good for you sure, but the whole package may or may not be. If ANYBODY doesn't consume dairy regularly the bacteria that allows you to process the dairy will die off and then boom you're lactose intolerant since it's entirely dependent on this bacteria to process it. No bacteria = no lactose tolerance. Oat milk whilst not milk it's more of a oat infused water makes more sense to drink. Personally I wouldn't drink either of them, but oat milk makes more sense for humans to drink.
The "married for money" story: I'm 100% sure the sisters hate OP so much not because of a principle thing or anything else, they hate OP purely because OP has money and freedom and seems to be overall pretty happy with her life (in their eyes at least) and they are probably stuck with a not so great financial situation and probably don't even love their husbands all that much (they were what was available at the time)
Yeah like maybe it's a bit of an odd arrangement, but the fact that OP and her husband respect each other and are "like awesome roommates with some benefits" who enjoy each other's company... really doesn't sound that different from a lot of marriages that started more traditionally. I don't know if OP's sisters are unhappy or just very judgy, but this is definitely a situation of their own making.
@@errantwinds-up8uu Yeah, but without the money she wouldn't have gotten married, that's a pretty big difference between traditional marriage and her being a Gold digger.
@@EliEli-eq4zb Actually, I'd argue it's even more like "traditional" marriages in that way. Back when women had to rely on their husbands for financial support, it was very often about the money.
@@cynister7384 They also actually loved their husband, she doesn't love him she loves his money. In a traditional marriage even if the husband was struggling the wife would stay with them. If he fails or is struggling she'll leave him without a second thought.
@@EliEli-eq4zb False. She literally said she loves her husband. She just not *in love* with him. And I find it funny that people are acting like this is some crime against humanity. Both parties wanted this arrangement and are apparently happy with it. This isn't some sketchy woman catfishing a clueless rich guy. 🙄 Seems to be they both have a fair bargain.
I’ve actually had oatmilk in my latte before. I asked for whole milk and the barista thought I said oat milk. It was different, but it wasn’t bad.