Omg this video its so perfect!!! Thank you so much!! This really inspires me to go look for change. Im moving out to another city soon, and i have this idea to vlog the process of adapting my SEO to that city and starting to advertise again and all that general grind...and im too sooooo anxious about vlogging!! I dont even usually take selfies! But seeing the process like this really pumps me up with energy to do so! Love your videos!!
I can't go outside. It's a combination of things. Social anxiety (hate having to talk to people, suck at it; can't do eye contact; can't always hear what people are saying, hate having to ask them to repeat themselves), fear of people staring and laughing (so many windows! they can see me, I can't see them), anxiety over my appearance (trans [out ~13yrs], masculine forehead; asymmetrical face, funny mandible [TMD]; yellow, messed-up teeth; rash, possibly psoriasis; hair looks meh; makeup skills suboptimal; marks from skinpicking; not sure about clothes), fear of running into my neighbours, fear of having a meltdown or a panic attack, fear of getting too tired and having to stop (someone my age shouldn't be in this condition), and maybe more. Luckily I'm able to get groceries and medications delivered. My mother always made sure that I'd act neurotypical but it left me with mental scars. Also, I'm a bit of a perfectionist. I haven't seen my psych nurse in months. It is obvious to me that surgery wouldn't fix everything but it would have a huge impact anyway. Not sure what to do. I should see a doctor (if they'll even listen) about my various issues. I can't even make/stay friends online because I'm afraid of rejection and sabotage everything (BPD). I'm 33, from Finland, live alone, and I have no friends anywhere nearby. My parents have helped out but they live far away and tend to have a negative impact on my mental health.
Yes. I actually tried to expose myself after a car accident but I ended up with a second one. 😔 I want to stop my fear of driving :s. I also have fear of trains, go outside and be around many people, public speech. I feel a disaster 😑
I am afraid of talking to strangers and the weird thing is I have to do it every day for my job. It never seems to get any better though. I still get a big adrenaline spike every time I see a person that I'm going to have to talk to. Then after the interaction is over I judge myself for how dumb I sounded.
Thanks so much for your video! I've suffered with crippling anxiety disorder for 14 years. I quit driving 10 years ago and am getting ready to get my lisence again. This cognitive therapy is tough! Facing fears (along with meds) has really helped. Just a few years ago, I couldn't even go into a store by myself without having a panic attack. Now I can go into a giant WalMart by myself and be okay. It has taken YEARS to get to this point. I don't think a lot of people understand it because they can't see it. I really enjoy your show. Thanks again!
Congratulations to you, Lizzie, on all the hard work you've done! You're absolutely right - so many don't understand how limiting anxiety can be because they just don't see it. It takes courage to do what you've done, to face your fears, and get comfortable being uncomfortable. I really appreciate you sharing your story here and I know it will help others to read it 👏👏👏
There are several factors in natural cures for shyness. One place I discovered that succeeds in merging these is the Seans Shy Program (google it if you're interested) it's the no.1 plan that I have ever heard of. look at all the interesting information .
the fact that you are DOING THE METHODS which you’re teaching in this video is really inspiring and vulnerable. i’ve been suffering of panic disorder for a year now, and i’m finally opening the door to exposure therapy. i’ve seen a lot of therapists gives great advice online and in books, but they rarely put themselves in a situation like this. i’m really grateful for your videos ❤️
Thanks for the feedback! This video is going to be such a foundational episode for future content that it needed to go long. It seems like RUclips's algorithm also prefers the longer videos. After making two of my longest videos I wanted to make something that was shorter, which is why my newest video on managing stress is just 90 seconds long. Apparently RUclips isn't a fan and the video didn't get shown to everyone. So I'll get back to 5 minute, 10 minute, 15 minute videos with the occasional 20 minute + MEGA episode.
This was so unbelievably helpful. Watching you go through each step, whilst filming your insecurities & talking us through your examples, made it so much easier to connect with and digest. I've struggled with social anxiety for most of my life. I was a happy go lucky, talkative child. But middle & high school really did a number on me. Those fears have stuck with me my entire life from that point on. Up until recently, I thought that I was broken and doomed to a life of solidarity. I'm thankful that people have been working towards raising awareness to mental health. Recently I decided I had had enough! My social anxiety had stolen years of my life; a career, friends, meaningful relationships, hopes & dreams. I decided to reach out for help from a therapist a few months back. Its been helpful but I'm really actually looking forward to trying this out. Thank you for your dedication to helping people face & overcome their fears.✌🙂
Based on the research related to this model, exposures don't need to be gradual. You can bounce around someone's hierarchy and that sense of surprise could help improve recall of new memories.
Man, this is a really nice video to see. I've been struggling with anxiety for a long time. Did my first exposure session last Friday. It's a super scary process, confronting the stuff I've been avoiding all my life. It's nice to see you demonstrating the process in action, you know? Helps make it a bit less scary, I think. :)
OMG THIS IS CRAZY, you just made me realize why my favourite foods are my favourite foods, I had spaghetti bolognese the first time when I was 12 at a really cool pool party with my mom and that became my favourite food because I felt really happy spending time with my mom in a cool place, ANOTHER TIME my best friend and I had chipotle because we saw a famous RUclips that we loved eat it one time and he loved it, so we had a really good experience eating burritos!!!! You blew my mind dude.
Adnan I had so much more Street Fighter material I had to cut out of this video! I went on a big rant about how Street Fighter is such a great representation of memories because each character is based on basic (stereotyped) associations of the regions they represent...
I’m almost 30 years old and recently discovered I’ve had anxiety my whole life due to childhood trauma. I just thought it was normal, now I am doing a lot of unwrapping on myself. I came across your channel and am very grateful to you. Thank you for these videos Doctor Mattu 🙏
I have developed a pretty severe anxiety disorder from my daily chest and back pains - been checked by doctors multiple times in the ER and they cannot find anything physical happening - they advised that my pains are a result of stress and anxiety and are muscular based - gave me some pain killers (none work for me unfortunately) and advised anti anxiety drugs and therapy. Since these pains started back in early March, I have avoided all the exercise I use to do daily (weights, practicing drumming and playing with the band - and walking) - any physical activity flares the pain up and my biggest fear is I will have a heart attack - because it sure feels like it. So - yesterday I went for a walk and tried to do the normal things I use to do before I got this - about half hour in my walk, my chest started flaring up - I was feeling uncomfortable - but I kept walking - even on inclines which hurt me even more usually - did that, no problem - kept going - now the pain really started and I was hyperventilating pretty bad. But still my biggest fear did not happen. Got home, sat on my deck and felt really, really uncomfortable for 10-15 minutes - achy chest pain and back - painful breathing -I was just waiting to keel over - but nothing happened. Then I started to feel better and couldn't believe I did not pass out. Will do this every day and see if I can rid myself of this horrible condition and anxiety I face on the daily - thank you for posting this very informative video on dealing with anxiety.
I feel like one of the best ways to overcome social anxiety, apart from gradual exposure, is caring less of other people's opinions about you. Because social anxiety's is about the fear of other peoples (negative) opinion. If he cares so much that if he goes outside with the camera people would think he's weird, he should work on those thoughts and start JUST caring less and be himself, and also work on his self confidence
Great video! I suffer with social anxiety also. This video and through experience I've come to realise most people are busy living their own lives to even care or notice what I am doing. Subscribed
What happens if during exposure therapy, the thing you're fearing does actually happen? E.g. with bees, you go near one and it does actually sting you. Then what?
I'm ready to face my fear of having phone conversations with people I don't know. Part of my new job is to call people I don't know and ask them questions. Avoidance will no longer work, so I will try the exposure techniques in this video. Thank you.
I'm really stuck it seems. I feel so miserable cause of my panic but I just can't find a reason to begin to start facing my fears. To many things will come if I got rid of my fears so it's more comfortable just having them even they are making my life hell. I don't get it. Why am i thinking like this? Great video by the way..
A mask sounds like a good idea. If I lived in New York 😂 These are really good useful tips. I will definitely try to practice these with my social anxiety (which I’ve gotten a lot better at over the past 6 months)
Every now and then I do see folks walking around in masks, regardless of the weather and time of year. Glad to hear the video was helpful! I'm going to have a follow up video on social anxiety in a few weeks.
I have panic attacks i gat married 16 years old and i have 3 kids my life is very hard i am afraid of my kids nothing to happen to them something bad 😞 thank you
Yayyyy! GREAT ONE Ali! I love that you've updated the science findings and added values/ 'find your why'! I remember feeling many of the same anxiety feelings making my videos. I love how you mixed outdoor and indoor shots. BRAVO!
Thank you for posting this. Your videos have really reached me. I'm a college student aspiring to teach English to junior high or high school students, and social anxiety has been a continuous hurdle between myself and my goals. It's good to know there are others struggling with this who are able to share positive experiences.
Hi! I have a question. Do you think this CBT technique applies to trauma and if so, to all kind of specific ones? I can't help but think that when it involves people causing the anxiety, it must be rather different as an approach because the risk of re-traumatisation is important. For example lately, I am avoiding someone I met recently because I have a strong transference on her of an abusive ex. I am even thinking that time with her was the cause of triggering a 'delusions' (that I am evil, manipulative, dangerous, mad - which is actually an embodiment of the characteristics of my perpetrators). Would exposure therapy still be advised for that issue, I wonder? Or for example, anxiety generated by one's family because of the family members suffering from difficult mental illness such as borderline personality disorder, or who are simply cruel, unloving, abusive. Then would exposure therapy still be advised, and if so, in what way? Or if a soldier on the fields becomes anxious about a specific weapon but is otherwise fine. Would exposure therapy be advised to help the individuals regain full ability to continue his work? (In an ideal world, I would like to assume the soldier to be off duty and rather steered away from working on the field. I am assuming that the realities of this world may be different, that that person's competences may be necessary and that the need for his continuing work may override the person's current emotional need). I am genuinely curious about the limits, if any, of exposure therapy. :)
Hi Linka, Thanks for your question. The simple answer is "yes and no". Let me try to explain. Trauma was recently moved out of anxiety disorders and into it's own category called Trauma and Stressor Related Disorders. The reason for this is trauma can create a variety of emotions that are different from anxiety. Anxiety can be associated with potential threats or things that are scary. But trauma is often the result of a threat that really happened and presented a potential loss of life or created a fundamental change in beliefs about yourself, others, or the world. Because traumas have occurred and also because they produce a variety of emotions they need a different treatment than exposure therapy alone. Some of these treatments focus on helping people to feel safe and learn how to regain control over their emotions. Others focus on helping people understand the impact a trauma has had on their life and develop a narrative associated with it. In these types of treatment there is a degree of exposure, but that's more exposure to memories and less to situations like I show in this video. A lot of people who experience a trauma may also develop anxiety. So to treat that, we'd first want to make sure the underlying trauma is treated THEN we'd move on to something like what I describe in this video to address anxiety. I hope this helped clear things up!
@@drali thank you! Went ok. Social anxiety did not prevent me from talking to many people but I still feel that I was performing/seeking validation. Upside is Im having a good laugh about it with my dear friend Anish who is in the same boat
Mad respect Doctor Ali. I watched another video of yours and you were talking about these steps and I remember feeling overwhelmed by the amount of steps one needs to do. Actually, I remembered that I had a fear of going out anywhere because I used to get extremely disoriented, I would miss the bus, get off at the wrong bus stop and would have to walk in an area that I don't know, be late etc. I used to spend some time practicing going somewhere, anywhere, without an aim just to practice facing some of my fears. It never went away completely though :D The strange thing is that I rarely had problems like this when I was on my layovers abroad (as a flight attendant) and exploring the city.
This is so helpful, thank you. I started watching the video crying my eyes out, but ended with a smile. I was in a very awkward situation yesterday that caused me so much anxiety that I thought about it till I went to bed. Waking up, my thoughts and fears started raging even more than yesterday, and I had a meltdown. It was worse because I thought I had overcome anxiety, so that situation was very unexpected, and I felt so lost. Maybe I need to resume my drug prescription. I stopped because I significantly improved I took a detailed note of all you've said and will put them to practice
Yes, absolutely. I have dealt with Social anxiety for about 4 years now. I finally want to do something about it and that has translated into making very small changes in my life slowly over time. This might just be saying hi to someone new in my class or asking how somebody's day is going while at work. Small things that make me a bit anxious, but not by much. Then over time, this will start feeling bland and easy so then you up the ante. Small, imperceptible changes over time make for a big difference in the long run.
Dr Ali Mattu, just want to say your channel is awesome! I'm learning so much to overcome my own anxiety and also to help people that I know! Please keep up the good content!
Thanks for these contents. I’ve been suffering severe anxiety and panics for four years. I’ve been frustrated if this disaster ever have any cure. It is amazing how much general public don’t know about mental illnesses.
A. 🙌🙌👏👏👍👍 fear conquered!!! B. Love this video! Thanks for your candor and vulnerability here. Plan on using this as an example with my patients! C. Awesome business cards! D. I like how you combined different approaches nicely. Values- based work, cog, behavioral (including interoceptive). I think weaving these together is a skill you demonstrate in how you present this! Thanks for the great video.
How can i overcome my fear of fainting or passing out from anxiety? I try to push myself to do these exposures but I get so dizzy I think I will pass out.
I recommend GRADUAL Exposure Therapy. Once you precisely identify what causes your anxiety. Try to just exposure yourself a little bit. Notice how at first he was super nervous to Vlog in a big park. However, since he gradually exposed himself to his fears little by little, he could vlog in front of a crowd and even film himself with people on camera by the end of it. Don't give up!!
I also have a mantra that helps me and goes like that "If it makes me grow, I will do it anyway". Be it networking in a party, giving a presentation, speaking up in my Master's class, ask a question, etc
Thanks so much! I’m trying as much as possible to show psychology in action instead of talking about it. And I love that mantra -> focusing on growth is a much more healthy approach than avoiding the tough stuff.
I love how you were able to really break down what it truly means to do exposure therapy! Its not enough to just throw yourself in the situation but to be able to dig down deep into how you are feeling. Get comfortable being uncomfortable. My 2020 mantra
wish you could be with me for some days...seeing your video made me calm when i had anxiety/panic attack. i experience heavy breathing & feel choked + upset stomach whenever i get anxiety or panic attack.some how this video made me relaxed.
Hi one month ago I have a bus anxiety. Strangely I don’t have anxiety when travelling in Mrt train. At home anxious thoughts come in my mind like, fear that people see my anxious look, fear that i lost my control over my fear. Think about if the buss is full and no seat for that I have to stand and people look me being nervous, think about what bus no to take, how would I fare in the bus etc. This bus anxiety drive me crazy and sometimes affect my daily life. Pls help me what should I do to make it disappear…. Thanks a lot
I have another technique that falls under the exposure category. Fashion exposure. We are taught that we should dress to cover up our anomalies. This actually is counterintuitive to our psyche because it is another layer of comfort we should strip down. If we dress and act in a way that maximizes and exposes our flaws. If you have a square face...dont cover it with hair....if ur balding shave your head...if you have blemeshes dont wear makeup. We can address each issue with clarity. We need to create a society where we chase after fear. This transforms it to invigoration. We need to be a society that doesnt mask our flaws. But accentuates our differences. Our differences need to be our primary face if we are ever to find peace within ourselves. The cosmetics and fashion industry were inspired by azazel and other fallen archon but that's another topic. Exposure to the truth is always helpful. Exposing yourself to half truths are pretty damaging. Getting rejected for instance is damaging but rejection+reflection is helpful. What else can we reflect on while we are outside? Does rejection have to be a part of the reflection process. If we are rejecting old harmful ideas with truthful memories then yes it has lasting power. Accepting something for instance...
I have a phobia of texting/phone calls because my grandmother guilt-tripped me as a kid for not calling her to thank her for gifts, and because my mom guilts trips me a lot via phone and texting. I think my best bet for exposure therapy will be to communicate with people besides my mom to highlight that my friends and neighbors do not resort to manipulation tactics, thus my very real fear of disappointment and rejection is just an old core belief that no longer serves me. Thanks Doc! For your super awesome self-care journal that you keep in your backpack with the foam-roller on it: You are a very bright light 💡 that this world needs! Thank you for being so brave and showing us that real change IS possible! You are so loved by so many people in this world, and as a community you help us all achieve success! Thanks for all you do! Keep going!!
I love your delivery, your're very easy to listen to and learn from. This is the first video I have watched, it would be helpful if there was a point form or summary in your description when your videos have this many steps. I can't wait to watch more! Thanks!
My anxiety is all body related,pain,illness related. I have Trigeminal Neuralgia, POTS, IBS, chronic insomnia etc I get exposed over and over and it gets worse not better.
thank you so much for this video , now i know how to deal with my anxiety , also it's the first time for a while for me to comment on something on social media cuz i always think that my opinion isn't important and that nobody care or i might say something stupid , but from now on these avoidances have to end thanks to you .
Watching you do this was actually pretty inspiring. I have been working on social anxiety for years, and I am finally able to do this kind of work. Seeing therapists do this kind of work is a really powerful tool for me.
This is exactly what me and my guy were talking about doing. Guess what? We went to the mountains and downtown Disney for me to handle being in crowds and feeling safe during pandemic. I hope it helps me deal with no longer feeling insecure about having anxiety issue in public. My thought is I can gain more independence from my minds assumptions and feel at ease outside again. My life has consisted of going to predictable places during pandemic.
Being on the other side of a trauma bond, I can definitely say that habituation makes us comfortable with even some of the most horrible things. Now I have anxiety around relationships. My anxiety convinces me that it’s protecting me. when, in reality it may somewhat be protecting me, but it’s definitely more isolating me. I guess I could work out some exposure and show myself that I can also protect myself when needed.
I have social anxiety. My fear is that following a social situation, I'll relive what happened for about a week and feel strong urges to hurt and punish myself for the things I said/did.
I have panic disorder after an accident back in 2006. Haven't worked in over 10 years. I got my medical coding credentials but am petrified to go back. Mostly for fear of failing bc of the panic.
It's not good or safe to have regular panic attacks, while driving on the highways/expressways . Especially long distance..Please help.. Almost caused a few accidents...
Hey, I have fear to eat and throw up, or not beeing able to eat and then like losing weight (and die). It's really important for me because fitness is closely related to my job and relationships, and I m scared that people notice that I cannot eat and judge me. Sometimes, when I try to eat, I really feel that if I swallow I would throw up, shoud I try nonetheless? Would it be worse if I actually throw up or not? Thanks
Hello doctor i have suddenly developed an anxiety to go in a lift even if its 1st floor only...plz help me i can't climb stairs i have knee prob and this fear of lift is killing me..i feel handicap now...😢😢
I love your technique and i found another one earlier that i was doubting but now im sure. Thank you. Chemical assisted exposure therapy. Let me explain. Something happened in my 20s that is still going. Stimulants such as coke speed even coffee or tea triggered massive anxiety. Now im using coffee to face my fears. Instead of trying to calm my self down by benzos or drinking. I take stims on purpose to chase after the fear. Ill purposely hyperventilate and overreact to get to the core of the problem. A lot of therapists say avoid things that make you anxious. I now use it as a compass to find my next move. Whatever im afraid of. Ill cause or exacerbate it on purpose. In fact heres another extreme therapy i just thought of this second. Make a list of things you fear. Then masturbate while thinking about those things. If we can get "turned on" by fear instead of being paralyzed by it then it would only help. In a world thats so chaotic and intense To find pleasure in fear would make this planet into a paradise. This is why I like psychedelics. But the right kind of exposure is the key. Half assed exposure can further put u in more trauma. If ur gonna moon. Do a full assed one.
I suffer from severe panic disorder and agoraphobia I've had it since my 20s my biggest thing is public or social interaction fighting the feeling to run from it is so hard I shut myself off from the world for 3yrs not coming out of my apartment I used exposure therapy to get back out in the world buti still fight my disorder everyday
Thank you for this video!! You have inspired me to face my fear. I have the exact fear of seeing my staff or someone I know when I'm at the beach or at a party because I'm far more conservative at work. I'm going to use all your strategies. So helpful you walking us through it with your your fear. Thank you!@
My fear is going out to street and feel panic and maybe get paralized in the street and can not go back home again, or worst, die in the street for my strong panic and thoughts that appear in my mind everytime I am going out
Omg!This video is so useful.I have social anxiety and I was scared for you,I understand how difficult this vlog was.You are very brave.Thank you so much for motivation!
This indeed was a motivating video, which sometime later probably, is going to make me feel guilty if I don't mindfully act on my fears (which seems extremely small yet has an impactful limitation on my goal) and search for reasons behind my defense mechanisms. Thank you for converting your insight into action and making us realize its worth!
Thanks for your comment, Dhruvi! The thing to remember about anxiety and fears is we all have them. They're normal. We also can't work on EVERY fear we have ALL the time. So to pick and choose based on where we are in life and then move forward with compassion for when we have a hard time (like I did on the subway) is the way to go.
I also love it that you demonstrated how to actually get rid of anxiety via live video footage. You showed me how to make life better. I wish i could help you out somehow. Thanks.
Do you have a fear you are trying to overcome?
Yess I'm trying to reduce my anxiety when I go places and when I'm in the car.
Omg this video its so perfect!!! Thank you so much!! This really inspires me to go look for change.
Im moving out to another city soon, and i have this idea to vlog the process of adapting my SEO to that city and starting to advertise again and all that general grind...and im too sooooo anxious about vlogging!! I dont even usually take selfies! But seeing the process like this really pumps me up with energy to do so!
Love your videos!!
I can't go outside. It's a combination of things. Social anxiety (hate having to talk to people, suck at it; can't do eye contact; can't always hear what people are saying, hate having to ask them to repeat themselves), fear of people staring and laughing (so many windows! they can see me, I can't see them), anxiety over my appearance (trans [out ~13yrs], masculine forehead; asymmetrical face, funny mandible [TMD]; yellow, messed-up teeth; rash, possibly psoriasis; hair looks meh; makeup skills suboptimal; marks from skinpicking; not sure about clothes), fear of running into my neighbours, fear of having a meltdown or a panic attack, fear of getting too tired and having to stop (someone my age shouldn't be in this condition), and maybe more. Luckily I'm able to get groceries and medications delivered. My mother always made sure that I'd act neurotypical but it left me with mental scars. Also, I'm a bit of a perfectionist. I haven't seen my psych nurse in months. It is obvious to me that surgery wouldn't fix everything but it would have a huge impact anyway. Not sure what to do. I should see a doctor (if they'll even listen) about my various issues. I can't even make/stay friends online because I'm afraid of rejection and sabotage everything (BPD). I'm 33, from Finland, live alone, and I have no friends anywhere nearby. My parents have helped out but they live far away and tend to have a negative impact on my mental health.
Yes. I actually tried to expose myself after a car accident but I ended up with a second one. 😔 I want to stop my fear of driving :s. I also have fear of trains, go outside and be around many people, public speech. I feel a disaster 😑
Sounds like you could be experiencing some agoraphobia. I'm going to have a follow up video on this topic soon!
I am afraid of talking to strangers and the weird thing is I have to do it every day for my job. It never seems to get any better though. I still get a big adrenaline spike every time I see a person that I'm going to have to talk to. Then after the interaction is over I judge myself for how dumb I sounded.
You the information we’ve learned today
You got this!
DO IT SCARED, is a quote I love...I love that one, bc yes, your scared, okkkk...well then rather than totally not doing it… Do it afraid
@@chelseanwalor3503 This is so true
Can you catch yourself and say hey you did good or you did your best?
Thanks so much for your video! I've suffered with crippling anxiety disorder for 14 years. I quit driving 10 years ago and am getting ready to get my lisence again. This cognitive therapy is tough! Facing fears (along with meds) has really helped. Just a few years ago, I couldn't even go into a store by myself without having a panic attack. Now I can go into a giant WalMart by myself and be okay. It has taken YEARS to get to this point. I don't think a lot of people understand it because they can't see it.
I really enjoy your show. Thanks again!
Congratulations to you, Lizzie, on all the hard work you've done! You're absolutely right - so many don't understand how limiting anxiety can be because they just don't see it. It takes courage to do what you've done, to face your fears, and get comfortable being uncomfortable. I really appreciate you sharing your story here and I know it will help others to read it 👏👏👏
There are several factors in natural cures for shyness. One place I discovered that succeeds in merging these is the Seans Shy Program (google it if you're interested) it's the no.1 plan that I have ever heard of. look at all the interesting information .
It is tough glad it’s getting better ❤️🩹 for you
Your not alone
the fact that you are DOING THE METHODS which you’re teaching in this video is really inspiring and vulnerable. i’ve been suffering of panic disorder for a year now, and i’m finally opening the door to exposure therapy. i’ve seen a lot of therapists gives great advice online and in books, but they rarely put themselves in a situation like this. i’m really grateful for your videos ❤️
I like this long videos where you give us a great and little deeper explanation, thanks!
Thanks for the feedback! This video is going to be such a foundational episode for future content that it needed to go long.
It seems like RUclips's algorithm also prefers the longer videos. After making two of my longest videos I wanted to make something that was shorter, which is why my newest video on managing stress is just 90 seconds long. Apparently RUclips isn't a fan and the video didn't get shown to everyone. So I'll get back to 5 minute, 10 minute, 15 minute videos with the occasional 20 minute + MEGA episode.
This was so unbelievably helpful. Watching you go through each step, whilst filming your insecurities & talking us through your examples, made it so much easier to connect with and digest. I've struggled with social anxiety for most of my life. I was a happy go lucky, talkative child. But middle & high school really did a number on me. Those fears have stuck with me my entire life from that point on. Up until recently, I thought that I was broken and doomed to a life of solidarity. I'm thankful that people have been working towards raising awareness to mental health. Recently I decided I had had enough! My social anxiety had stolen years of my life; a career, friends, meaningful relationships, hopes & dreams. I decided to reach out for help from a therapist a few months back. Its been helpful but I'm really actually looking forward to trying this out. Thank you for your dedication to helping people face & overcome their fears.✌🙂
Gradual exposure is great for overcoming anxiety 🔥
Based on the research related to this model, exposures don't need to be gradual. You can bounce around someone's hierarchy and that sense of surprise could help improve recall of new memories.
Man, this is a really nice video to see. I've been struggling with anxiety for a long time. Did my first exposure session last Friday. It's a super scary process, confronting the stuff I've been avoiding all my life. It's nice to see you demonstrating the process in action, you know? Helps make it a bit less scary, I think. :)
Congratulations, Sebastian, on taking that first big step forward in facing your fears! So happy to hear this video was helpful in some way 😀
Thanks for the free therapy session! :)
Get ready for a lot more! I'm going to make follow ups on each of the major anxiety disorders!!!
The Psych Show hehe
I got anxiety watching you having it and own it GREAT EXPOSURE!!
OMG THIS IS CRAZY, you just made me realize why my favourite foods are my favourite foods, I had spaghetti bolognese the first time when I was 12 at a really cool pool party with my mom and that became my favourite food because I felt really happy spending time with my mom in a cool place, ANOTHER TIME my best friend and I had chipotle because we saw a famous RUclips that we loved eat it one time and he loved it, so we had a really good experience eating burritos!!!! You blew my mind dude.
So Street Fighter was teaching us valuable psychological lessons this whole time ;)
Adnan I had so much more Street Fighter material I had to cut out of this video! I went on a big rant about how Street Fighter is such a great representation of memories because each character is based on basic (stereotyped) associations of the regions they represent...
Street Fighter was just the friends we made along the way, bubby.
I’m almost 30 years old and recently discovered I’ve had anxiety my whole life due to childhood trauma. I just thought it was normal, now I am doing a lot of unwrapping on myself. I came across your channel and am very grateful to you. Thank you for these videos Doctor Mattu 🙏
same problem, what have you done for overcome it?
I have developed a pretty severe anxiety disorder from my daily chest and back pains - been checked by doctors multiple times in the ER and they cannot find anything physical happening - they advised that my pains are a result of stress and anxiety and are muscular based - gave me some pain killers (none work for me unfortunately) and advised anti anxiety drugs and therapy. Since these pains started back in early March, I have avoided all the exercise I use to do daily (weights, practicing drumming and playing with the band - and walking) - any physical activity flares the pain up and my biggest fear is I will have a heart attack - because it sure feels like it. So - yesterday I went for a walk and tried to do the normal things I use to do before I got this - about half hour in my walk, my chest started flaring up - I was feeling uncomfortable - but I kept walking - even on inclines which hurt me even more usually - did that, no problem - kept going - now the pain really started and I was hyperventilating pretty bad. But still my biggest fear did not happen. Got home, sat on my deck and felt really, really uncomfortable for 10-15 minutes - achy chest pain and back - painful breathing -I was just waiting to keel over - but nothing happened. Then I started to feel better and couldn't believe I did not pass out. Will do this every day and see if I can rid myself of this horrible condition and anxiety I face on the daily - thank you for posting this very informative video on dealing with anxiety.
This is probably one of the best videos about exposure treatment 👏
my anxiety is going thru the roof just thinking bout exposure n facing my fears
I started watching because this guy is eye candy, but I'm lucky enough he actually makes good content as well
That was actually inspiring.
I feel like one of the best ways to overcome social anxiety, apart from gradual exposure, is caring less of other people's opinions about you. Because social anxiety's is about the fear of other peoples (negative) opinion. If he cares so much that if he goes outside with the camera people would think he's weird, he should work on those thoughts and start JUST caring less and be himself, and also work on his self confidence
Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man was awesome! Gotta love NY.
I hope your social anxiety doesn't turn you into a super-villain, Dr. Ali. :D
I KNOW! When I heard someone say, "Can I be in your vlog?", I never expected it to be Spider-Man!
Great video!
I suffer with social anxiety also. This video and through experience I've come to realise most people are busy living their own lives to even care or notice what I am doing.
Subscribed
What happens if during exposure therapy, the thing you're fearing does actually happen? E.g. with bees, you go near one and it does actually sting you. Then what?
This was great stuff, really inspired me to go & face my social anxiety.
Yay!!!! So happy to hear that. Good luck in your journey #GCBU
This is such an interesting experience! Thanks dude
Man this help me so much thank you..I’m so tired of this anxiety had it for 15 years
for 15 yearss?? really??
how are you today?
I'm ready to face my fear of having phone conversations with people I don't know. Part of my new job is to call people I don't know and ask them questions. Avoidance will no longer work, so I will try the exposure techniques in this video. Thank you.
I'm really stuck it seems. I feel so miserable cause of my panic but I just can't find a reason to begin to start facing my fears. To many things will come if I got rid of my fears so it's more comfortable just having them even they are making my life hell.
I don't get it. Why am i thinking like this?
Great video by the way..
I feel like I found a key that I’ve been searching for.
Thanks dr. Good luck !! 🥰
Thank you so much... This was a much needed video🙏
Thanks for watching!
A mask sounds like a good idea. If I lived in New York 😂
These are really good useful tips. I will definitely try to practice these with my social anxiety (which I’ve gotten a lot better at over the past 6 months)
Every now and then I do see folks walking around in masks, regardless of the weather and time of year. Glad to hear the video was helpful! I'm going to have a follow up video on social anxiety in a few weeks.
The Psych Show how crazy that we ACTUALLY have to wear masks now😂😂
I have panic attacks i gat married 16 years old and i have 3 kids my life is very hard i am afraid of my kids nothing to happen to them something bad 😞 thank you
Yayyyy! GREAT ONE Ali! I love that you've updated the science findings and added values/ 'find your why'! I remember feeling many of the same anxiety feelings making my videos. I love how you mixed outdoor and indoor shots. BRAVO!
Thank you so much, Lara! Whenever I'm lost, it always helped me to use my values as a compass to guide me forward.
Thank you for posting this. Your videos have really reached me. I'm a college student aspiring to teach English to junior high or high school students, and social anxiety has been a continuous hurdle between myself and my goals. It's good to know there are others struggling with this who are able to share positive experiences.
How is it now? I want to take master and doctoral degree. But cant imagine speaking of students everyday :(
Hi! I have a question. Do you think this CBT technique applies to trauma and if so, to all kind of specific ones?
I can't help but think that when it involves people causing the anxiety, it must be rather different as an approach because the risk of re-traumatisation is important.
For example lately, I am avoiding someone I met recently because I have a strong transference on her of an abusive ex. I am even thinking that time with her was the cause of triggering a 'delusions' (that I am evil, manipulative, dangerous, mad - which is actually an embodiment of the characteristics of my perpetrators). Would exposure therapy still be advised for that issue, I wonder?
Or for example, anxiety generated by one's family because of the family members suffering from difficult mental illness such as borderline personality disorder, or who are simply cruel, unloving, abusive. Then would exposure therapy still be advised, and if so, in what way?
Or if a soldier on the fields becomes anxious about a specific weapon but is otherwise fine. Would exposure therapy be advised to help the individuals regain full ability to continue his work? (In an ideal world, I would like to assume the soldier to be off duty and rather steered away from working on the field. I am assuming that the realities of this world may be different, that that person's competences may be necessary and that the need for his continuing work may override the person's current emotional need).
I am genuinely curious about the limits, if any, of exposure therapy. :)
Hi Linka,
Thanks for your question. The simple answer is "yes and no". Let me try to explain.
Trauma was recently moved out of anxiety disorders and into it's own category called Trauma and Stressor Related Disorders. The reason for this is trauma can create a variety of emotions that are different from anxiety. Anxiety can be associated with potential threats or things that are scary. But trauma is often the result of a threat that really happened and presented a potential loss of life or created a fundamental change in beliefs about yourself, others, or the world.
Because traumas have occurred and also because they produce a variety of emotions they need a different treatment than exposure therapy alone. Some of these treatments focus on helping people to feel safe and learn how to regain control over their emotions. Others focus on helping people understand the impact a trauma has had on their life and develop a narrative associated with it. In these types of treatment there is a degree of exposure, but that's more exposure to memories and less to situations like I show in this video.
A lot of people who experience a trauma may also develop anxiety. So to treat that, we'd first want to make sure the underlying trauma is treated THEN we'd move on to something like what I describe in this video to address anxiety.
I hope this helped clear things up!
It absolutely did! Thank you so much for bringing me clarity on this matter 😇@@drali
I will try this out later today. Anxious as heck about it. But lets see
Good luck!!!
@@drali thank you! Went ok. Social anxiety did not prevent me from talking to many people but I still feel that I was performing/seeking validation. Upside is Im having a good laugh about it with my dear friend Anish who is in the same boat
Mad respect Doctor Ali. I watched another video of yours and you were talking about these steps and I remember feeling overwhelmed by the amount of steps one needs to do. Actually, I remembered that I had a fear of going out anywhere because I used to get extremely disoriented, I would miss the bus, get off at the wrong bus stop and would have to walk in an area that I don't know, be late etc. I used to spend some time practicing going somewhere, anywhere, without an aim just to practice facing some of my fears. It never went away completely though :D The strange thing is that I rarely had problems like this when I was on my layovers abroad (as a flight attendant) and exploring the city.
The first time watch him and already love him. Not just giving lectures , his way is sooo Very practical, wow.
This is so helpful, thank you. I started watching the video crying my eyes out, but ended with a smile. I was in a very awkward situation yesterday that caused me so much anxiety that I thought about it till I went to bed. Waking up, my thoughts and fears started raging even more than yesterday, and I had a meltdown. It was worse because I thought I had overcome anxiety, so that situation was very unexpected, and I felt so lost. Maybe I need to resume my drug prescription. I stopped because I significantly improved
I took a detailed note of all you've said and will put them to practice
Wow you’re so cool, I hope I can be like this.
Can i overcome social anxiety disorder? Most people say you can't. Please help.
They say anxiety can not be overcome completely.
Yes, absolutely. I have dealt with Social anxiety for about 4 years now. I finally want to do something about it and that has translated into making very small changes in my life slowly over time. This might just be saying hi to someone new in my class or asking how somebody's day is going while at work. Small things that make me a bit anxious, but not by much. Then over time, this will start feeling bland and easy so then you up the ante. Small, imperceptible changes over time make for a big difference in the long run.
WOW I'm so early but it's 4 am where I am and I gotta go to sleep. Will watch soon.
Hope you found it helpful!
Dr Ali Mattu, just want to say your channel is awesome! I'm learning so much to overcome my own anxiety and also to help people that I know! Please keep up the good content!
Thanks for these contents. I’ve been suffering severe anxiety and panics for four years. I’ve been frustrated if this disaster ever have any cure. It is amazing how much general public don’t know about mental illnesses.
A. 🙌🙌👏👏👍👍 fear conquered!!!
B. Love this video! Thanks for your candor and vulnerability here. Plan on using this as an example with my patients!
C. Awesome business cards!
D. I like how you combined different approaches nicely. Values- based work, cog, behavioral (including interoceptive). I think weaving these together is a skill you demonstrate in how you present this!
Thanks for the great video.
So glad to hear it resonated with you in all of these ways! Thanks for watching, writing a supportive comment, and I hope this helps your patients :-)
How can i overcome my fear of fainting or passing out from anxiety? I try to push myself to do these exposures but I get so dizzy I think I will pass out.
I’m not gonna lie to you Tina I fainted once and it ducked
@@eddiew2325 really not helping guy
@@huckfinch8699 Right, now i'm worried!
I recommend GRADUAL Exposure Therapy. Once you precisely identify what causes your anxiety. Try to just exposure yourself a little bit. Notice how at first he was super nervous to Vlog in a big park. However, since he gradually exposed himself to his fears little by little, he could vlog in front of a crowd and even film himself with people on camera by the end of it. Don't give up!!
@@eddiew2325 omg this scares me because i feel dizzy when im in a big supermarket
"Practice what I preach". Wise words.
Wow!! Great job!! It's inspiring to watch a Psychologist overcoming his fear in real time, putting the theories into practice! Thank you :)
I also have a mantra that helps me and goes like that "If it makes me grow, I will do it anyway". Be it networking in a party, giving a presentation, speaking up in my Master's class, ask a question, etc
Thanks so much! I’m trying as much as possible to show psychology in action instead of talking about it. And I love that mantra -> focusing on growth is a much more healthy approach than avoiding the tough stuff.
Thanks Doc, am really struggling w social anxiety for so long..
Anyone fall asleep and the symptoms start again and u low key just wanna roll over and beg for it to go away
I love how you were able to really break down what it truly means to do exposure therapy! Its not enough to just throw yourself in the situation but to be able to dig down deep into how you are feeling. Get comfortable being uncomfortable. My 2020 mantra
I have fear of speaking because of how I sound and makes me have a memory fog. I struggle with speaking alot to a point that it's exhausting. ..
wish you could be with me for some days...seeing your video made me calm when i had anxiety/panic attack. i experience heavy breathing & feel choked + upset stomach whenever i get anxiety or panic attack.some how this video made me relaxed.
Thanks so much for your video, you have described most of the things that I am suffering.
Hi one month ago I have a bus anxiety. Strangely I don’t have anxiety when travelling in Mrt train. At home anxious thoughts come in my mind like, fear that people see my anxious look, fear that i lost my control over my fear. Think about if the buss is full and no seat for that I have to stand and people look me being nervous, think about what bus no to take, how would I fare in the bus etc. This bus anxiety drive me crazy and sometimes affect my daily life. Pls help me what should I do to make it disappear…. Thanks a lot
I appreciate you Dr. Life changing information for me. I dam near had an attack just watching this. Bravo "practice what you preach". Awesome.
Hey, I’m a subscriber from Chris’ channel! I love the content you’re making keep up the awesome work!!
Thanks so much for stopping by and joining our community, Chelsey! Really appreciate your encouragement too 🙌
I have another technique that falls under the exposure category. Fashion exposure. We are taught that we should dress to cover up our anomalies. This actually is counterintuitive to our psyche because it is another layer of comfort we should strip down.
If we dress and act in a way that maximizes and exposes our flaws.
If you have a square face...dont cover it with hair....if ur balding shave your head...if you have blemeshes dont wear makeup.
We can address each issue with clarity.
We need to create a society where we chase after fear. This transforms it to invigoration.
We need to be a society that doesnt mask our flaws. But accentuates our differences.
Our differences need to be our primary face if we are ever to find peace within ourselves.
The cosmetics and fashion industry were inspired by azazel and other fallen archon but that's another topic.
Exposure to the truth is always helpful.
Exposing yourself to half truths are pretty damaging.
Getting rejected for instance is damaging but rejection+reflection is helpful.
What else can we reflect on while we are outside?
Does rejection have to be a part of the reflection process.
If we are rejecting old harmful ideas with truthful memories then yes it has lasting power.
Accepting something for instance...
I have a phobia of texting/phone calls because my grandmother guilt-tripped me as a kid for not calling her to thank her for gifts, and because my mom guilts trips me a lot via phone and texting. I think my best bet for exposure therapy will be to communicate with people besides my mom to highlight that my friends and neighbors do not resort to manipulation tactics, thus my very real fear of disappointment and rejection is just an old core belief that no longer serves me. Thanks Doc!
For your super awesome self-care journal that you keep in your backpack with the foam-roller on it: You are a very bright light 💡 that this world needs! Thank you for being so brave and showing us that real change IS possible! You are so loved by so many people in this world, and as a community you help us all achieve success! Thanks for all you do! Keep going!!
This content is incredible. So glad I found your channel. But I guess RUclips has a funny way of showing what they think should be suggested.. hah..
I love your delivery, your're very easy to listen to and learn from. This is the first video I have watched, it would be helpful if there was a point form or summary in your description when your videos have this many steps. I can't wait to watch more! Thanks!
My anxiety is all body related,pain,illness related. I have Trigeminal Neuralgia, POTS, IBS, chronic insomnia etc I get exposed over and over and it gets worse not better.
thank you so much for this video , now i know how to deal with my anxiety , also it's the first time for a while for me to comment on something on social media cuz i always think that my opinion isn't important and that nobody care or i might say something stupid , but from now on these avoidances have to end thanks to you .
Watching you do this was actually pretty inspiring. I have been working on social anxiety for years, and I am finally able to do this kind of work. Seeing therapists do this kind of work is a really powerful tool for me.
This is exactly what me and my guy were talking about doing. Guess what? We went to the mountains and downtown Disney for me to handle being in crowds and feeling safe during pandemic. I hope it helps me deal with no longer feeling insecure about having anxiety issue in public. My thought is I can gain more independence from my minds assumptions and feel at ease outside again. My life has consisted of going to predictable places during pandemic.
Being on the other side of a trauma bond, I can definitely say that habituation makes us comfortable with even some of the most horrible things. Now I have anxiety around relationships. My anxiety convinces me that it’s protecting me. when, in reality it may somewhat be protecting me, but it’s definitely more isolating me. I guess I could work out some exposure and show myself that I can also protect myself when needed.
I have social anxiety. My fear is that following a social situation, I'll relive what happened for about a week and feel strong urges to hurt and punish myself for the things I said/did.
Just watching your videos are already calming me down .🙏🙏 Thank you so much.. I suffer from severe panic I even get it at home.😢😰
Insightful video...
I’m not gonna lie to you Sandeep I love you
I have panic disorder after an accident back in 2006. Haven't worked in over 10 years. I got my medical coding credentials but am petrified to go back. Mostly for fear of failing bc of the panic.
It's not good or safe to have regular panic attacks, while driving on the highways/expressways . Especially long distance..Please help.. Almost caused a few accidents...
Could exposure help with avoidance behaviours in gad?
It feels positive to watch your videos when I am also the one who suffer from panic attacks and anxiety.. thanks for these videos..
Hey, I have fear to eat and throw up, or not beeing able to eat and then like losing weight (and die). It's really important for me because fitness is closely related to my job and relationships, and I m scared that people notice that I cannot eat and judge me. Sometimes, when I try to eat, I really feel that if I swallow I would throw up, shoud I try nonetheless? Would it be worse if I actually throw up or not? Thanks
Hello doctor i have suddenly developed an anxiety to go in a lift even if its 1st floor only...plz help me i can't climb stairs i have knee prob and this fear of lift is killing me..i feel handicap now...😢😢
I love your technique and i found another one earlier that i was doubting but now im sure. Thank you.
Chemical assisted exposure therapy.
Let me explain. Something happened in my 20s that is still going. Stimulants such as coke speed even coffee or tea triggered massive anxiety.
Now im using coffee to face my fears.
Instead of trying to calm my self down by benzos or drinking. I take stims on purpose to chase after the fear.
Ill purposely hyperventilate and overreact to get to the core of the problem.
A lot of therapists say avoid things that make you anxious.
I now use it as a compass to find my next move.
Whatever im afraid of. Ill cause or exacerbate it on purpose.
In fact heres another extreme therapy i just thought of this second.
Make a list of things you fear. Then masturbate while thinking about those things.
If we can get "turned on" by fear instead of being paralyzed by it then it would only help.
In a world thats so chaotic and intense
To find pleasure in fear would make this planet into a paradise.
This is why I like psychedelics.
But the right kind of exposure is the key.
Half assed exposure can further put u in more trauma.
If ur gonna moon. Do a full assed one.
The key to life seems to be exposure+reflection.
When you’re vlogging are you just talking to your phone? I’m trying to picture what a vlogger would look like in public.
Driving & panic attacks ..Not safe please advise..Thnks
I suffer from severe panic disorder and agoraphobia I've had it since my 20s my biggest thing is public or social interaction fighting the feeling to run from it is so hard I shut myself off from the world for 3yrs not coming out of my apartment I used exposure therapy to get back out in the world buti still fight my disorder everyday
What if the anxiety is rational-meaning new memories and increasingly realistic expectations reinforce the anxiety?
Yes my friend you will be anxious forever
I really appreciate your content, I think you have great delivery =D
Thanks so much for your support!
Great video Dr.Ali
Thank you for this video!! You have inspired me to face my fear. I have the exact fear of seeing my staff or someone I know when I'm at the beach or at a party because I'm far more conservative at work. I'm going to use all your strategies. So helpful you walking us through it with your your fear. Thank you!@
My panic attack start, when i feel like im having a heart attack.. and when my acid reflux start..
My fear is going out to street and feel panic and maybe get paralized in the street and can not go back home again, or worst, die in the street for my strong panic and thoughts that appear in my mind everytime I am going out
Omg!This video is so useful.I have social anxiety and I was scared for you,I understand how difficult this vlog was.You are very brave.Thank you so much for motivation!
You are God!!Thank you so much to spreading awareness
Im scared of sleeping in the dark
Im scared that i'll make a fool out of myself
Great explanation man.Basically it is facing your fears without thinking too much about the outcome.And keep them videos coming.🤘
This indeed was a motivating video, which sometime later probably, is going to make me feel guilty if I don't mindfully act on my fears (which seems extremely small yet has an impactful limitation on my goal) and search for reasons behind my defense mechanisms. Thank you for converting your insight into action and making us realize its worth!
Thanks for your comment, Dhruvi! The thing to remember about anxiety and fears is we all have them. They're normal. We also can't work on EVERY fear we have ALL the time. So to pick and choose based on where we are in life and then move forward with compassion for when we have a hard time (like I did on the subway) is the way to go.
@@drali This gave me a clearer picture. Thank you.
Thank you. I have a interview today. I just wanted to cancel and now I am going to do.
if we saw this life kinda more like a rpg videogame it would be a lot easier
Could you please make a video on how to overcome Selective Mutism?
Everytime I overcome it 50% it comes back n I have to re expose myself to get over it
I have anxiety moving to a new job.
same thing what happened in your life have you change to your work
Your fear of police in this picture is interesting :)
Nice video
WOW what a reality .... Thanks bro to share it
You are a super vortex of ideas. This is contagious and welcome. This is a real life healer folks. Your videos are a blessing bro. I live in NYC too.
I also love it that you demonstrated how to actually get rid of anxiety via live video footage. You showed me how to make life better. I wish i could help you out somehow. Thanks.
Ok so how do I use this at the doctors office or in the dentist chairs ?
Apparently a new yorkers worst fear is a stranger saying thank you 😂
Loved the video ❤
HAHA 😂
Glad you liked it!!!
Thanks for actually doing the thing. I trust you a lot more now. Practicing what you preach is awesome!
I won’t recommend anything I’m not willing to do myself 👍🏽