Nancy Regan Look 😊 That’s the way she looked at her husband…. That’s the space we hold for our beloved and we basked them in purest appreciation, and acceptance, and healing….
This video was very helpful for me tonight specifically. After separating from my partner (distance-wise, for school/work), we are going through a new transition. I've been wanting a more open relationship, yet still find myself scared and jealous of him with other girls. I don't want to feel this way, and I feel like I shouldn't, so it's been a struggle. Thank you so much, Conor, for sharing this fear. It helps a lot to see you and Brittany be raw with us. It's easier to relate to and really grow from. I am so grateful for the two of you and this channel. :)
What I've really been appreciating about all your videos is how non-judgemental you both are will each other and yourselves about the feelings that come up. I find it so important that you've both shared that getting to that place has been a process and I think we are often too hard on ourselves when we feel things that we think we 'shouldnt' whether positive or negative feelings. I love the way you both "allow space" for those feelings instead of trying to get rid of them or shame yourself for having them at all. This is something I think we all can work towards as individuals as I think it will probably all make us happier, healthier people.
Thank you so much for this comment. It feels really good to be seen and good to know what we are sharing is coming across the way we intended. Much love to you!
The last bit when you two were looking directly at the camera telling me it wasdifficult but worth it, ahh, had me in tears. I've been in a relationship with someone for a year, and we've been working on our Open relationship for most of it, and there are so many times where it blows up and we talk and try and fix, and I feel that every time it blows up it's because of my fear and jealousy, and unwillingness to say how I feel- and that he is constantly having to fix and reassure. It's not fair to either of us, and every bit of me wants to be excited for him and us and this, but it is always a very painful struggle. I think what makes it difficult is that realtionships like this aren't in the media and I have no friends to approach about it, because it's relatively rare. Thank-you for sharing your exploration, it is such a comfort to watch.
I'm really blown away by how you both think. I don't know how to find another person who is so in touch and motivated by exploring emotions. I hope I can find them though because you make a relationship feel explorative and free as opposed to trapped, which is a fesr of mine - committing to someone and being trapped by it. anyway, you guys are really amazing. much love.
Wow you guys are SO LOVABLE!! I genuinely feel so much love rise in me when I watch all your videos and I'm so thankful for your vulnerability and sharing. Every single one of your videos has me asking how I can be more loving to both myself and my process and all my feelings and my partner and his process and all his feelings. Thank you for helping me expand my heart.
It blows my mind how when I get REAL with myself, I can talk myself down, so to speak, from fear to excitement and contentment in a matter of minutes. I can go from freaked out to calm from within by connecting with myself. Conor it feels amazing to watch you be so authentic with yourself and Brittany and with the rest of the world. To watch you go through these real emotions and to have you share it and to see Brittany giving you love and compassion is so fulfilling to me. Brittany, your generous nature is, to me, what so many are lacking out of insecurity. It's such a beautiful energy that I wish the world could have more of. The people on this planet are so concerned with what others think that they aren't living authentically. It's sad, yet I can only wish it for the masses. It's not even the idea of connecting with others, it's the idea of connecting with ourselves. I'm going to go on and on if I don't stop here! Such a great and inspiring video guys actually it was amazing! Sending love to you both! Tammie Miller
Beautifully candid video. It's interesting that this video shared 3 responses to feelings of insecurity. 1. Time alone to discover the source of the fear, allowing it to be there, embracing it etc 2. Looking to the other person to reassure you that they won't leave you (which we all know isn't the path) 3. See that their choice may be beneficial to your desired experience in life AND.... there's a 4th..... Discover that true security is found WITHIN us, such that even while "in love", whether someone stays or leaves becomes irrelevant to our unconditional joy in life. Living in the knowing that our peace, contentment, utter bliss, and utter sense of well-being in life comes not from the presence or absence of anyone external but from Source, our inner being/Spirit which is the greater part of who we truly are. THAT, to me, is the ultimate antidote for "fear of losing" anyone. So we only "fear losing" if we think we will lack something if someone leaves. We feel no lack when we deeply know we are 100% complete as we are. Solo. Nothing or no-one else required to feel that sense of completeness, sense of well-being, true joy, and happiness in life.... because true joy, well-being etc. is supplied by Source, our inner being, Infinite Intelligence, and not by another human being. Other humans simply provide a variety of ways to experience to that deep joy and contentment we were already born with, but what they add is optional; we lack nothing if they choose to leave. We are complete as we are. Solo.
Omg thank you! Needed to hear this. I am poly and this fear is sometimes completely taking over and it can’t make me think rationally. I need to find inner peace and love.
Listening to you guys and watching how you are with one another has legitimately improved my relationship over the past couple of months, making it more honest, loving and altogether... more authentic. Please keep putting out videos because I truly believe you are two of the most beautiful, kindhearted and genuine people on RUclips. You are really a joy to watch. Love you both.
"It's not about tolerating things. It's about the life-enhancing magic of us all opening up to... to experiencing more of our full selves" You guys are so beautiful. I love how you look at the camera, look at each other... watching this it feels like I'm sitting there with you in this warm intimate moment. Sharing about the fears of sharing your lover - thank you for allowing us to walk with you though this process.
I found you two through Alyse's channel. :) I have almost nothing in common with you beauties at all. What I do resonate with is the look in your eyes when you look at each other. That is why I keep watching. It's such a beautiful thing to see. And it's so wonderful that I can resonate and understand that in spite of our very polar differences. The world needs more love and tolerance. You guys are a sweet picture of that all inclusive love.
You guys express things I visualise when I think about polyamory and how I feel about it, and it's just really fulfilling, beautiful and exciting to hear. You're so open and so aware of yourselves, it makes me happy you exist
It is so nice to hear this. My boyfriend and I practice openness in our relationship. I have had issues with feeling like he will find some one else attractive (trust me, it's all vulnerability, my head is a crazy place sometimes lol). But I recognize this and understand this about my self and I work on it and I discuss it with him and he reassures me that he may find others attractive but, he'll never love another like he loves me. Which is so true and I love him for understanding my problems with our relationship sometimes. So, it makes me feel so much better knowing it is common for others to share this thought/fear.
It's so beautiful to hear more from you and to receive these reflections about your relationship. Thank you so much for sharing them here. We love that you and your boyfriend share this closeness and communication about your fears. So beautiful! We so dig this! xoxo
Love vs. Attachment! I ponder this topic often. Still, when one of you has a "human" moment, I breathe a sigh of relief. Thank you for revealing this, Conor. XXOO to you both!
hahhaa, I love this comment. Thanks Ali. It is such a great topic. And it's so awesome to all be human together in this way. We all got fears, baby! Heaps of love to you!!!
I have grown to love you guys so much it makes me want to cry. Your words make me grow and help create so much space for peace and compassion, and compersion. ❤️
Thank you so much, Tammie! I am sorry for your loss, but happy for the time you had with your special person. I am very grateful for all I have, and will not waste my time on fear. Much love to you. 😚
Two things; really digging this 'behind-the-scenes' look at your processing process, I appreciate your vulnerability for sure, very inspiring. Also, absolutely love that, when shyly asking questions, you twirl your hair with your fingers (6.18-ish) - adorbs :) Keep 'em comin'!
Thank you so much for sharing your experience in the moment. I love when you were talking about how there is SO much space for fear that it transforms into love. Such a unique and beautiful perspective that makes a lot of sense to me. Love you guys!
I love when he shares that too! It's such a beautiful way to think about it. Thank you so much for watching and for sharing! Heaps of love to you!!! -Britt
Thank you for sharing this! This topic is very present right now in my life since I've recently started a "no label" relationship and is constantly swinging between happiness and fear. I'm madly in love with this guy (in a way I haven't been for many years) and right now I am having him "for myself" so to speak. But I know this situation is bound to change and I will eventually have to get used to sharing his time and focus with others. I have to remind myself every day that he will not like me less because of that. However I have a hard time letting myself have hopes and dreams for this relationship and a big part of me is preparing for this being very temporary. But the truth is: This is not more or less temporary then any other relationship! The only difference from a monogamous couple is that we don't have an extra safety net of expectations, fear, shame and guilt stopping us from breaking up if any of us don't want to stay anymore. Instead we have the luxury of "no rules" which in theory would make our relationship even stronger because there's less reasons for us to break up if we happen to break any of those "rules".
Fear, sadness, frustration. These are so important to talk about and process. Those emotions are almost ALWAYS a struggle for me. Even thought I'm much more in touch with them and better at allowing them they are tough. Please tell more about your emotions. It's great to hear how it becomes less of a struggle. It doesn't matter if these emotions come up in a relationship or just in life. they are important and many of us, perhaps all of us, have been taught to repress them
We will absolutely keep sharing about them. We have noticed that letting go of the resistance, the desire to fight against them, has allowed those feeling to relax rather than overwhelm us. We keep returning to the believe that love, love for the world, for ourselves, for those emotions, creates health which creates happiness. Thanks so much for the share!
you gave me a bit of inner peace with this video, it's great to know that "even you" have to deal with this kind of feelings/situations even if you already have achieved such a great state of connection with you and your surroundings, that gives me hope that I will also be able to deal with this small percentage of fear that is still left inside of me thank you for sharing your thoughts, you are just so amazing and beautiful human beings
This is such a beautiful comment. Thank you so much for sharing. Yes! I love all being able to share with one another in this open way, and to see that we are all human. Thank you for being another beautiful human being :)
Thank you for your 100% honesty about everything. it's so true no matter your relationship dynamic that fear, weither jealousy based or fear from something else it happens to everyone, an what matters most is how we chose to handle it. I've personally learned when these things happen to me in my relationship it normally 9 out of 10x's has something to-do with an unresolved issue within me needing to be explored and dealt with. l just found your guys page thru Britney's( Opps spelling) channel earlier this evening with the video tour of Winnie cause I've been looking alot into tiny living and becoming a minimalist and have been marathon watching your videos ever since, that was 5 1/2 hours go. You both really such beautiful people and even thru the videos you can see your amazing connection. look forward to more videos.
I am so glad I found this channel, your videos have honestly helped me see polyamorous / open relationships in a whole new light. Your content is truly eye opening, thank you both for making these videos 🙏🏻
'just go for it' Brittany is so supportive (as is Conor). Something I appreciate you so much for sharing your lives. I've found too, that when I feel that 1% Conor is talking about, when I'm alone, it intensifies. I just really am working on reminding myself that my relationship with someone isn't replicable. IF someone else has a stronger connection with someone I connect with, that's not something that will just happen overnight. Loving someone else, or enjoying someone else, doesn't necessarily have to take that intensity out of the connection you have in that established relationship. I don't know if that makes sense. I guess what I'm saying is they aren't mutually exclusive. The two relationships aren't mutually exclusive. Being okay with someone you feel so strongly for, starting to feel strongly for someone else is definitely a journey, and not one with a straight upwards trajectory. There are ups and downs, and all you can do is be introspective and aware. My gosh, if everyone were just more open and came into relationships and conversations and interaction with an open heart and from a space of compassion... what a world we would live in. I just want to say your love for each other radiates in each video. Thank you both so much for sharing your journey. It's affected mine
Love your comment through and through! So many great points here. These relationships, all of them, do not follow a straight forward trajectory! We love this - "My gosh, if everyone were just more open and came into relationships and conversations and interaction with an open heart and from a space of compassion..." -- we believe this is possible!! Let's all do it together
Thank you, you two, for your contribution on pure love to the world. I have the kind of same relationship with my best friend. No matter what happens you two will always stay connected, the connection you two have is special and you are here to make a mission on making people taking a new view on relationships. Even if you connect with new people the depth and chemistry you have cannot be replicated. We are here to connect and explore - yes, but in the end it's the few special bonds that matters to the self. Because only one person contains an infinite number of layers. You understand the power of infinite exploration - and adventures life has to offer, and you both do it so well in your own pace and time, but in the end, besides having fun it's the two of you who really sparks the magic and make people connect again.
This is such a beautiful comment to receive. Thank you so much for sharing here. I love how you describe this connection and love that you share such a supportive space with your best friend. Amazing. Thank you so much.
It's so wonderful to see that there are males our there that are willing to be in tune with themselves emotionally, and that care about their health intensely, not only with exercise, but also with diet. I need some sent my way! Brittany, you found yourself a good one. Where the heck are all the ones like this in Wisconsin... seriously lol!
You too are so beautiful, and articulating your thoughts and the process and thinking it all through....... Wow... You are both so good to listen to.. Just the way Brittany you look so lovenly at Connor, and the way Conor you have a twinkle in your eyes when Brittany says something that sort of blows your mind.... I love it Thank you for all these snippets into life.... So grateful. Thank you Hope you will keep on making them as I need to hear you both talking because you make such good sense. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
you make me cry and showed me how much I want to share my love and how desperate I am cause I don`t know how... Thanks so much for sharing your experience Conor, this mean a lot to me
I just wanted to let you guys know that your videos have been super helpful for me - these are the exact things I'm going through and I'm so thankful about this channel. Love the energy, love the message, love you guys!
yayyy! This feels so awesome to hear. This is exactly why we love sharing! Thanks for letting us know- it makes it so worthwhile! Sending heaps of love to you! Internet hug!
You guys are incredible and love watching your videos. Lately I have been interested in the type of relationship you guys have, and I feel like it suits me the best. I also love connecting with others and how else can we grow more and more if we stay in the exact same spot for most of our lives. I'm talking about long term relationships with kids. The world is beautiful, so why not explore
I just keep coming back to this video, its so vulnerable and powerful to take on and the implications in your life..huge. wow thank you so much for sharing.
Adrian and Chelsea! omg, we just read this comment and are feeling the love so hardcore. I am so glad you both shared here. We feel so much love for you both. Keep on rocking your awesome journeys and relationship! xoxoxo
haha. so I've taken a few things from their channel..such as sleeping in the nude, experimenting with out bras and panties and also too...."holding space" which I've shared with my 8 yr old son. as he gets older I want him to know that we can go into holding space and we can both share without judgement. as I watch this video in the car he overhears them talk about the feelings and asks me "are they having holding space?" 😊 while he's not keeping up with the conversation, he recognizes the openess
That is so awesome! My children and I also share holding space. My son is probably one of the most mature/compassionate 6 year olds I know just because I have been honest and open with him since I can remember. That's beautiful!
I love what you wrote. I am excited to read and hear that more parents are raising their sons to be more open with their feelings, and to accept each other. I'm doing the same with my son and I love that his sensitive spirit has really latched on to this way of being.
After watching this video what feels missing for me is how did Brittany come to this place of self assuredness and feeling ok with Connor having other partnerships. Perhaps you could do a video on that journey Brittany?
I am so proud of you guys.... Honestly..... you bring so much love and hope in the world... in my world. .... in life. thank you for shining from within sooooooo much....
Thank you for this. My partner is planning to connect with someone later today and this is still quite new to us. But this video has helped me feel grounded and decided, and... better.
@@conorandbrittany Thanks again beautiful people. Me and my partner were pleased to see you got our thanks. Found you through your cooking, believe it or not. Veganism keeps proving to be the gift that keeps on giving since it lead me to your knowledge. Much love!
@@conorandbrittany Thanks again beautiful people. Me and my partner were pleased to see you got our thanks. Found you through your cooking, believe it or not. Veganism keeps proving to be the gift that keeps on giving since it lead me to your knowledge. Much love!
I absolutely love your videos guys, such a strong and true message. Thank you for being such beautiful humans inside and out sharing with us your cool journey. Much love your way!
Lovelies... first of all... thank you! so refreshing and enlightening your relationship on such an authentic view... thank you for sharing your journey with us... Also.. theme suggestion: Holding space tips for the extreme bumpy moments, as in both of you are feeling challenged... I'd love to know how you manage these! Lots of loveeee Ri
Hi Ri! Thanks so much for reaching out and for all your support and loveee! It feels so amazing to receive! This is a great topic idea. We would love to talk more about this. Thank you and lots of love to you!
I could never live like this but I still like watching your videos. I get a little sad because it seems like you both genuinely really love each other and I don't get the need to sleep with other people. To me, you can connect in so many other ways and sex isn't necessary to 'seal the deal.' But that's just me. I appreciate all three (!!) of your channels all for different reasons. To me, this all sounds like a big struggle somehow, especially on Conor's part but I'm sure he'd beg to differ. It's almost like a free pass to just screw around but when you're saying it's for growth, I dunno - 'lipstick on a pig' is a little harsh, but it just doesn't feel right....... but that's just me! :) Keep on making the videos - I really do watch them all - they make me think. :)
Thanks for reaching out and sharing more of your experience here. I can really understand all of the things that you are expressing. We so appreciate you watching our videos and love that you are doing things the way that feels best for you! We love that!
Yes - totally. I'm always open to listening to others and how they think. I especially liked the one about getting over a habit because you're not dealing with uncomfortable feelings. You guys really are a trip....and in the best way.
Connor and Brittany are very physical people, they love bodies. For such a long time, I had a VERY difficult time understanding polyamory and their mindset concerning commitment and intimacy while sharing other people. I finally was able to experience this as a demisexual without leaving my sexuality! It's a very beautiful thing : )
As always your message has helped me on my journey through life. I learn so much in all of your videos and it has nothing to do with sex even! I learn how to be a more calming and understanding individual and how to maintain happy and healthy relationships. Whether it is with my friends,family,or god ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
I love the adoration I see in your guys eyes when you look at each other. And pausing for that kiss? Felt totally natural and really made me smile! (And...might have made my heart skip a beat! 😉) You two have wonderful chemistry and I just love you both!
I wanted to make a cool comment on this cool cool cool video, and the only word that keeps coming up is “Growth”... so I Googled the synonyms and these words felt good... breakthrough, betterment, development, enrichment, expansion, improvement, prosperity, cultivation, evolution, flowering, maturation, unfolding, EVOLVEMENT :) So cool to see. Thank ya’ll for sharing, again... and much LOVE to you both
I would love to see something about your views on religion. love you guys and you inspire me to be myself and not form to standards. thank you for being a positive light, you guys have the purest hearts.
We really believe whatever is serving someone else is awesome. We are both believers in much that we can not see or quantify. Energy, love, the god within all us- these are very real concepts to us and where we place our highest trust. Thanks for asking!
Thank you so much for sharing and making these videos, it is amazing to get a different perspective on relationships. I know alternatives exist but so often it is taboo to talk about it, and I think that is dangerous and also harmful because then people are boxed into thinking that relationships should be one way and cause someone to shy away from their authentic self and not be authentic within a relationship because it doesn't fit the narrow view of what a relationship is/isn't.
I really want to know how you guys totally get rid of those scary, jealousy & fearful abandonment feelings within your relationship. Its so hard for me to imagine being okay with seeing someone you love go be sexual with another or risk losing them. idk. It would be great to not have negative emotions. ❤✌
I love all this and the two of you seem to have done a lot of growth and ground work in order to make this possible and be excited for it all even in times of fear. I think some videos on exactly the tools you use to confront tough things like fear and jealousy would be helpful. Most people don't have a way to process in a productive way or have good coping skills or may not know how to be in that triggered space w/o flipping out. You can say that you are excited for how this enhances your life and how the fear is ok.. but how exactly do you get to that place ? :)
I like crying. When it comes I'm so down to just let it go. I wasn't really feeling that in this video but I think I could see what you are talking about. Thanks for the comment! -Conor
100% understandning here. Thank you so much for sharing your..like, life experience, really interesting and helpful Just helps to figure out how life works ^^ I 've had the same experience in my relationship lately with honesty, and it's been exactly like you're shift and just changed everything so much Funny how these kind of videos always seem to appear after an own epiphany like that
your intentions are to be so commiyed to one another, but what if when conflict arises my intention is not to commit, but the opposite? it makes it difficult to move forward with someone.
wow. U two totally and completely inspire me. I stumbled on this page because ofmy own relationship struggles and this is exactly what i needed. The honesty nd divine love is so apparent and jumps through the screen. I feel so loved and supported in this moment having seen u two. Blessed. thnksfor posting!:)
Hey Connor and Brittany. Thank you for sharing your experiences! I was feeling into the story and started wondering... It seems like the part of Conor that felt fear is maybe an "exile" part and therefore, it seemed like very small in the beginning. When Conor had the chance to feel into himself, it actually just became more clear that it was there to begin with. Within this video it seemed to me like he started telling himself that whatever would happen in the future outside of him would be beneficial to him. This felt not so good for me, for two reasons. First, it seems like the outcome of every experience has to be: we always want to stay open to connecting to other human beings. Would it not be more open / fluid and in the moment to not have that fixed outcome? It would feel more organic to me if it would also be okay to be open to other human beings until one of the two feels like he or she is in the proces of integrating parts and therefore feel into if it really feels save to have the other person connect with other humans, in that moment. That also can again change afterwards, right? The other thing is, safety cannot be found in the outcome of you two staying in connection. Wouldn't it feel more integrated/save if even when the connection between Brittany and the other human would grow and would take energy away from what is between the two of you, that would also be an okay outcome? The safety would than come from finding safety within the Self.
Hi Judith! Totally exile based with some beautiful protectors taking close care. The IFS explanation of the experience would be a little different than what I shared in this video. I LOVE LOVE LOVE your observations and they truly make sense. Safety outside of Self is not my desire but the narrative, "this serves me because I choose it [from a place of Self]" does and that is what I was feeling. I am so open to exploring this more too, thank you for the message
Nice to hear your reply! I absolutely believe that the way the two of you are connecting with each other and other humans is what you desire and therefore, comes from Self. Maybe it was also a bit a projection, because when my exile parts would play up it would feel more save for me to be honest with that and say; I would love for us to not connect with others in this moment, but am still willing to find out when that feels save again. As you said in the video, apparently you are moving through this actually quite fast now. I just love how you two are birthing a new kind of relating awareness. Since there is not so big a field of this awareness out there, I would imagine talking it slow while moving forward in connection would sometimes be a loving way to grow. Love, Judith
Just reading this now--- thank you so much for the reply! ooo feels really good to read this all Judith. Love your reflection and the reflection you have inspired in myself! So much love to you! -Conor
I understand what you two are saying, but for me I just could not be comfortable with the person I love even flirting with another girl.... I feel like if he truly loves me and is my soulmate he should be fulfilled by me. Thoughts?
That is awesome! We love that you know what you want. We don't have a desire for anyone to do anything like us. We really just want to share in our hopes that some of what comes up for us, regardless of the type of relationship one is in or wants to be in, is useful. Thanks for asking!
I understand growth. But life can push us to grow in so many ways, however as a mother I could not personally teach this by example. In my heart I know. Is your fear, your reflections balanced. Found.
Conor, I love the little bloop on the back of your head... almost a man bun! I DO NOT think you are being dumb at all! My husband is 14 years younger than me, and we have been married 15 years. I have a lot of bad dreams where he dumps me for a younger woman, but in real life I refuse to be afraid! I let it go. I blow it away, scattering it into the universe, and I am happy.😘
Melissa, The love of my life was 17 years younger than me and it was the most amazing and fulfilling relationship I've ever had. I am so glad you got to marry yours and you dont let those fears get the best of you! Enjoy ALL of it! Mine passed away suddenly and I am so grateful for the time I had with him. Be happy and definitely cancel those bad dreams! Cancel and erase them for they are not worthy of your time. Tammie Miller
Can I ask, what if one of you decides you can't cope at all with another person involved. That you only want each other forever. Do you honour that? xx
Thanks for reaching out about this. This has never come up for us, but if it did I know we would communicate about it in a loving way and figure out how it made sense for both of us to move forward. We also talk more about this topic here if you are interested: ruclips.net/video/7JukcvP2jBg/видео.htmlm31s Thanks again for writing! xoxo
Ooh, thanks for asking! It feels like such a nice, all-encompassing word to us! I like seeing and feeling people as their own, full human selves and not thinking of them as in a group of people that has a potential label on them. Thanks for the chance to ponder this more!
Well just googling those terms I found that Swinger is defined as :"The definition of a swinger is slang for someone who lives an uninhibited lifestyle. A person who engages freely in experimental sexual behavior is an example of a swinger." And polyamory is defined as: "the philosophy or state of being in love or romantically involved with more than one person at the same time." I suppose we sort of fall into both categories. I also think these words have different meanings for different people. We have personally never resonated with the word "swinger" so we don't use it. For us that term holds a certain emotionally detached feeling that we don't ascribe to in our connections. Thanks for asking. Fun to think about. Much love to you.
I think for me one big challenge (of many) in an open relationship would be trusting the other person this way *with my life*. That is, trusting that they would always practice safe sex, including the mouth. Even very healthy-looking/speaking ppl can have STDs. And sometimes that condom malfunctions ... and then the possibility of being impregnated by the person being invited into the relationship, a major change in the relatioinship... It's nice to speak of all the love and rainbows aspect of it, but all that can change in a heartbeat with just one bad choice, or just some freak thing. I'm not saying what you're doing is "bad," just very risky, and not to be taken lightly. I'd wanna make sure the f*ck was worth all the risk. And really, that is the appropriate word, because real love isn't instantaneous, it's something that comes over time with many real and varied experiences. Once cultivated with one person, I'd wanna make sure any risks with it (and the additional risks mentioned) were very worthy.
I absolutely love the way Brittany looks at Connor when he's speaking
I totally agree! The love is palpable!
I love it too ;) -Conor
May we all have partners that inspire that look... both ways.
Nancy Regan Look 😊
That’s the way she looked at her husband….
That’s the space we hold for our beloved and we basked them in purest appreciation, and acceptance, and healing….
Conor, you're vulnerability here is so huge. I have so much respect for you
Thank you so much
This video was very helpful for me tonight specifically. After separating from my partner (distance-wise, for school/work), we are going through a new transition. I've been wanting a more open relationship, yet still find myself scared and jealous of him with other girls. I don't want to feel this way, and I feel like I shouldn't, so it's been a struggle. Thank you so much, Conor, for sharing this fear. It helps a lot to see you and Brittany be raw with us. It's easier to relate to and really grow from. I am so grateful for the two of you and this channel. :)
What I've really been appreciating about all your videos is how non-judgemental you both are will each other and yourselves about the feelings that come up. I find it so important that you've both shared that getting to that place has been a process and I think we are often too hard on ourselves when we feel things that we think we 'shouldnt' whether positive or negative feelings. I love the way you both "allow space" for those feelings instead of trying to get rid of them or shame yourself for having them at all. This is something I think we all can work towards as individuals as I think it will probably all make us happier, healthier people.
Thank you so much for this comment. It feels really good to be seen and good to know what we are sharing is coming across the way we intended. Much love to you!
The last bit when you two were looking directly at the camera telling me it wasdifficult but worth it, ahh, had me in tears. I've been in a relationship with someone for a year, and we've been working on our Open relationship for most of it, and there are so many times where it blows up and we talk and try and fix, and I feel that every time it blows up it's because of my fear and jealousy, and unwillingness to say how I feel- and that he is constantly having to fix and reassure. It's not fair to either of us, and every bit of me wants to be excited for him and us and this, but it is always a very painful struggle. I think what makes it difficult is that realtionships like this aren't in the media and I have no friends to approach about it, because it's relatively rare. Thank-you for sharing your exploration, it is such a comfort to watch.
I'm really blown away by how you both think. I don't know how to find another person who is so in touch and motivated by exploring emotions. I hope I can find them though because you make a relationship feel explorative and free as opposed to trapped, which is a fesr of mine - committing to someone and being trapped by it. anyway, you guys are really amazing. much love.
Your emotional awareness, and literacy is truly inspiring. We look forward to learning more from you to compliment our own journey. Thank you.
Wow you guys are SO LOVABLE!! I genuinely feel so much love rise in me when I watch all your videos and I'm so thankful for your vulnerability and sharing. Every single one of your videos has me asking how I can be more loving to both myself and my process and all my feelings and my partner and his process and all his feelings. Thank you for helping me expand my heart.
Thank you so very much for giving us this beautiful comment. It feels so good to receive.
It blows my mind how when I get REAL with myself, I can talk myself down, so to speak, from fear to excitement and contentment in a matter of minutes. I can go from freaked out to calm from within by connecting with myself. Conor it feels amazing to watch you be so authentic with yourself and Brittany and with the rest of the world. To watch you go through these real emotions and to have you share it and to see Brittany giving you love and compassion is so fulfilling to me. Brittany, your generous nature is, to me, what so many are lacking out of insecurity. It's such a beautiful energy that I wish the world could have more of. The people on this planet are so concerned with what others think that they aren't living authentically. It's sad, yet I can only wish it for the masses. It's not even the idea of connecting with others, it's the idea of connecting with ourselves. I'm going to go on and on if I don't stop here! Such a great and inspiring video guys actually it was amazing! Sending love to you both! Tammie Miller
Your comments are always so beautiful and supportive. Thank you so much!!! Sending you tons of love back
You are sooo welcome! You both inspire me so much! xoxoxo
Beautifully candid video. It's interesting that this video shared 3 responses to feelings of insecurity.
1. Time alone to discover the source of the fear, allowing it to be there, embracing it etc
2. Looking to the other person to reassure you that they won't leave you (which we all know isn't the path)
3. See that their choice may be beneficial to your desired experience in life
AND.... there's a 4th.....
Discover that true security is found WITHIN us, such that even while "in love", whether someone stays or leaves becomes irrelevant to our unconditional joy in life. Living in the knowing that our peace, contentment, utter bliss, and utter sense of well-being in life comes not from the presence or absence of anyone external but from Source, our inner being/Spirit which is the greater part of who we truly are. THAT, to me, is the ultimate antidote for "fear of losing" anyone.
So we only "fear losing" if we think we will lack something if someone leaves. We feel no lack when we deeply know we are 100% complete as we are. Solo. Nothing or no-one else required to feel that sense of completeness, sense of well-being, true joy, and happiness in life.... because true joy, well-being etc. is supplied by Source, our inner being, Infinite Intelligence, and not by another human being. Other humans simply provide a variety of ways to experience to that deep joy and contentment we were already born with, but what they add is optional; we lack nothing if they choose to leave. We are complete as we are. Solo.
Great share. Thank you
Omg thank you! Needed to hear this. I am poly and this fear is sometimes completely taking over and it can’t make me think rationally. I need to find inner peace and love.
@@Jillthinkstwiceu still poly?
Listening to you guys and watching how you are with one another has legitimately improved my relationship over the past couple of months, making it more honest, loving and altogether... more authentic. Please keep putting out videos because I truly believe you are two of the most beautiful, kindhearted and genuine people on RUclips. You are really a joy to watch. Love you both.
This is so awesome to read!!! Thank you so much for sharing this. We will keep making the vids.
"It's not about tolerating things. It's about the life-enhancing magic of us all opening up to... to experiencing more of our full selves"
You guys are so beautiful. I love how you look at the camera, look at each other... watching this it feels like I'm sitting there with you in this warm intimate moment.
Sharing about the fears of sharing your lover - thank you for allowing us to walk with you though this process.
I found you two through Alyse's channel. :) I have almost nothing in common with you beauties at all. What I do resonate with is the look in your eyes when you look at each other. That is why I keep watching. It's such a beautiful thing to see. And it's so wonderful that I can resonate and understand that in spite of our very polar differences. The world needs more love and tolerance. You guys are a sweet picture of that all inclusive love.
Oh that's awesome! She's so lovely! Thank you so much for these lovely words!!! We hope you keep watching and enjoy the vids
You guys express things I visualise when I think about polyamory and how I feel about it, and it's just really fulfilling, beautiful and exciting to hear. You're so open and so aware of yourselves, it makes me happy you exist
Thank you so much for watching and commenting Negomi. So happy it resonates with you
It is so nice to hear this. My boyfriend and I practice openness in our relationship. I have had issues with feeling like he will find some one else attractive (trust me, it's all vulnerability, my head is a crazy place sometimes lol). But I recognize this and understand this about my self and I work on it and I discuss it with him and he reassures me that he may find others attractive but, he'll never love another like he loves me. Which is so true and I love him for understanding my problems with our relationship sometimes. So, it makes me feel so much better knowing it is common for others to share this thought/fear.
It's so beautiful to hear more from you and to receive these reflections about your relationship. Thank you so much for sharing them here. We love that you and your boyfriend share this closeness and communication about your fears. So beautiful! We so dig this! xoxo
It's so lovely to hear that with consistent self-work and self-love you can make this kind of progress with challenging emotions.
Love vs. Attachment! I ponder this topic often. Still, when one of you has a "human" moment, I breathe a sigh of relief. Thank you for revealing this, Conor. XXOO to you both!
hahhaa, I love this comment. Thanks Ali. It is such a great topic. And it's so awesome to all be human together in this way. We all got fears, baby! Heaps of love to you!!!
I have grown to love you guys so much it makes me want to cry. Your words make me grow and help create so much space for peace and compassion, and compersion. ❤️
Sending you so much love
Thank you so much, Tammie!
I am sorry for your loss, but happy for the time you had with your special person.
I am very grateful for all I have, and will not waste my time on fear. Much love to you. 😚
I love the way you guys look at each other.
I come to your channel when I need brightness to my day. Thank you both for simply...being who you are
Two things; really digging this 'behind-the-scenes' look at your processing process, I appreciate your vulnerability for sure, very inspiring. Also, absolutely love that, when shyly asking questions, you twirl your hair with your fingers (6.18-ish) - adorbs :)
Keep 'em comin'!
Awesome! Thank you so much for that feedback!!! We will keep them coming
Thank you so much for sharing your experience in the moment. I love when you were talking about how there is SO much space for fear that it transforms into love. Such a unique and beautiful perspective that makes a lot of sense to me. Love you guys!
I love when he shares that too! It's such a beautiful way to think about it. Thank you so much for watching and for sharing! Heaps of love to you!!! -Britt
Thank you for sharing this! This topic is very present right now in my life since I've recently started a "no label" relationship and is constantly swinging between happiness and fear. I'm madly in love with this guy (in a way I haven't been for many years) and right now I am having him "for myself" so to speak. But I know this situation is bound to change and I will eventually have to get used to sharing his time and focus with others.
I have to remind myself every day that he will not like me less because of that.
However I have a hard time letting myself have hopes and dreams for this relationship and a big part of me is preparing for this being very temporary.
But the truth is: This is not more or less temporary then any other relationship! The only difference from a monogamous couple is that we don't have an extra safety net of expectations, fear, shame and guilt stopping us from breaking up if any of us don't want to stay anymore.
Instead we have the luxury of "no rules" which in theory would make our relationship even stronger because there's less reasons for us to break up if we happen to break any of those "rules".
Fear, sadness, frustration. These are so important to talk about and process. Those emotions are almost ALWAYS a struggle for me. Even thought I'm much more in touch with them and better at allowing them they are tough. Please tell more about your emotions. It's great to hear how it becomes less of a struggle. It doesn't matter if these emotions come up in a relationship or just in life. they are important and many of us, perhaps all of us, have been taught to repress them
We will absolutely keep sharing about them. We have noticed that letting go of the resistance, the desire to fight against them, has allowed those feeling to relax rather than overwhelm us. We keep returning to the believe that love, love for the world, for ourselves, for those emotions, creates health which creates happiness. Thanks so much for the share!
you gave me a bit of inner peace with this video, it's great to know that "even you" have to deal with this kind of feelings/situations
even if you already have achieved such a great state of connection with you and your surroundings, that gives me hope that I will also be able to deal with this small percentage of fear that is still left inside of me
thank you for sharing your thoughts, you are just so amazing and beautiful human beings
This is such a beautiful comment. Thank you so much for sharing. Yes! I love all being able to share with one another in this open way, and to see that we are all human. Thank you for being another beautiful human being :)
Thank you for your 100% honesty about everything. it's so true no matter your relationship dynamic that fear, weither jealousy based or fear from something else it happens to everyone, an what matters most is how we chose to handle it. I've personally learned when these things happen to me in my relationship it normally 9 out of 10x's has something to-do with an unresolved issue within me needing to be explored and dealt with. l just found your guys page thru Britney's( Opps spelling) channel earlier this evening with the video tour of Winnie cause I've been looking alot into tiny living and becoming a minimalist and have been marathon watching your videos ever since, that was 5 1/2 hours go. You both really such beautiful people and even thru the videos you can see your amazing connection. look forward to more videos.
Going through this same feeling right now...it's a process between fear, love, compersion and more love...thanks guys for your guidance!
I am so glad I found this channel, your videos have honestly helped me see polyamorous / open relationships in a whole new light. Your content is truly eye opening, thank you both for making these videos 🙏🏻
'just go for it' Brittany is so supportive (as is Conor). Something I appreciate you so much for sharing your lives. I've found too, that when I feel that 1% Conor is talking about, when I'm alone, it intensifies. I just really am working on reminding myself that my relationship with someone isn't replicable. IF someone else has a stronger connection with someone I connect with, that's not something that will just happen overnight. Loving someone else, or enjoying someone else, doesn't necessarily have to take that intensity out of the connection you have in that established relationship. I don't know if that makes sense. I guess what I'm saying is they aren't mutually exclusive. The two relationships aren't mutually exclusive. Being okay with someone you feel so strongly for, starting to feel strongly for someone else is definitely a journey, and not one with a straight upwards trajectory. There are ups and downs, and all you can do is be introspective and aware. My gosh, if everyone were just more open and came into relationships and conversations and interaction with an open heart and from a space of compassion... what a world we would live in. I just want to say your love for each other radiates in each video. Thank you both so much for sharing your journey. It's affected mine
Love your comment through and through! So many great points here. These relationships, all of them, do not follow a straight forward trajectory! We love this - "My gosh, if everyone were just more open and came into relationships and conversations and interaction with an open heart and from a space of compassion..." -- we believe this is possible!! Let's all do it together
Thank you, you two, for your contribution on pure love to the world. I have the kind of same relationship with my best friend. No matter what happens you two will always stay connected, the connection you two have is special and you are here to make a mission on making people taking a new view on relationships. Even if you connect with new people the depth and chemistry you have cannot be replicated. We are here to connect and explore - yes, but in the end it's the few special bonds that matters to the self. Because only one person contains an infinite number of layers. You understand the power of infinite exploration - and adventures life has to offer, and you both do it so well in your own pace and time, but in the end, besides having fun it's the two of you who really sparks the magic and make people connect again.
This is such a beautiful comment to receive. Thank you so much for sharing here. I love how you describe this connection and love that you share such a supportive space with your best friend. Amazing. Thank you so much.
It's so wonderful to see that there are males our there that are willing to be in tune with themselves emotionally, and that care about their health intensely, not only with exercise, but also with diet. I need some sent my way! Brittany, you found yourself a good one. Where the heck are all the ones like this in Wisconsin... seriously lol!
You too are so beautiful, and articulating your thoughts and the process and thinking it all through....... Wow... You are both so good to listen to..
Just the way Brittany you look so lovenly at Connor, and the way Conor you have a twinkle in your eyes when Brittany says something that sort of blows your mind.... I love it
Thank you for all these snippets into life.... So grateful. Thank you
Hope you will keep on making them as I need to hear you both talking because you make such good sense. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
you make me cry and showed me how much I want to share my love and how desperate I am cause I don`t know how... Thanks so much for sharing your experience Conor, this mean a lot to me
I just wanted to let you guys know that your videos have been super helpful for me - these are the exact things I'm going through and I'm so thankful about this channel. Love the energy, love the message, love you guys!
yayyy! This feels so awesome to hear. This is exactly why we love sharing! Thanks for letting us know- it makes it so worthwhile! Sending heaps of love to you! Internet hug!
You guys are incredible and love watching your videos. Lately I have been interested in the type of relationship you guys have, and I feel like it suits me the best. I also love connecting with others and how else can we grow more and more if we stay in the exact same spot for most of our lives. I'm talking about long term relationships with kids. The world is beautiful, so why not explore
I agree, and why miss out on beautiful relationships? This is our one go around in life, we shouldn't spend it holding ourselves back.
I just keep coming back to this video, its so vulnerable and powerful to take on and the implications in your life..huge. wow thank you so much for sharing.
Wow thank you. That means a lot to me -Conor
I love them together and the way she looks at him. So much love in her eyes!
It's a beautiful experience working through your fears like that. You're both glowing :)
Thank you so much :). This feels amazing to receive!
I needed this video♡ Thanks Conor for sharing that 1%. It showed me it's okay to be scared, expecially in the beginning. I love you guys!!♡😘
Babe I love you so much!😊 Im just so appreciative that you've been so understanding, open minded, and willing to be on this journey with me❤
Yes! I'm so glad you felt that way watching this video. I'm so glad Conor shared this too! We love youuuuu!-Britt
Adrian and Chelsea! omg, we just read this comment and are feeling the love so hardcore. I am so glad you both shared here. We feel so much love for you both. Keep on rocking your awesome journeys and relationship! xoxoxo
+Conor and Brittany D'awww you guys... lol ❤ we have love for y'all too. Thanks for inspiring honest communication!
"My end goal isn't to get rid of fear altogether." ...brilliant.
Fear is ok.
Nice to hear that.
haha. so I've taken a few things from their channel..such as sleeping in the nude, experimenting with out bras and panties and also too...."holding space" which I've shared with my 8 yr old son. as he gets older I want him to know that we can go into holding space and we can both share without judgement. as I watch this video in the car he overhears them talk about the feelings and asks me "are they having holding space?" 😊 while he's not keeping up with the conversation, he recognizes the openess
That is so sweet ❤
That is so awesome! My children and I also share holding space. My son is probably one of the most mature/compassionate 6 year olds I know just because I have been honest and open with him since I can remember. That's beautiful!
+Dreadhead Fox 👍👍
I love what you wrote. I am excited to read and hear that more parents are raising their sons to be more open with their feelings, and to accept each other. I'm doing the same with my son and I love that his sensitive spirit has really latched on to this way of being.
After watching this video what feels missing for me is how did Brittany come to this place of self assuredness and feeling ok with Connor having other partnerships. Perhaps you could do a video on that journey Brittany?
they have both been open and connecting with other people since the beginning of their relationship...
I am so proud of you guys.... Honestly..... you bring so much love and hope in the world... in my world. .... in life. thank you for shining from within sooooooo much....
Conor you’re such an inspiration on loving yourself it’s wonderful
What a great video! This is exactly the kind of thing I've been wanting to see. Love you guys ❤️
yayyy! I'm so glad this is what you were looking for, Shannon. Thanks for watching. We love you!
Ohhhh My God
Pure love at its best!!!
Melting….. So so so much of you in you 💕💕💕💕
Thank you for this. My partner is planning to connect with someone later today and this is still quite new to us. But this video has helped me feel grounded and decided, and... better.
So happy to read that this video feels helpful for you!!
@@conorandbrittany Thanks again beautiful people. Me and my partner were pleased to see you got our thanks. Found you through your cooking, believe it or not. Veganism keeps proving to be the gift that keeps on giving since it lead me to your knowledge. Much love!
@@conorandbrittany Thanks again beautiful people. Me and my partner were pleased to see you got our thanks. Found you through your cooking, believe it or not. Veganism keeps proving to be the gift that keeps on giving since it lead me to your knowledge. Much love!
You guys are beautiful people. This video brought a smile on my face.
Thank you so much! I'm so glad you watched and enjoyed!! xoxo
Thank you Conor for expressing yourself. You two are magical
Thank you for receiving me
I absolutely love your videos guys, such a strong and true message. Thank you for being such beautiful humans inside and out sharing with us your cool journey. Much love your way!
Wow, Bella, thank you so much for this beautiful comment! It feels so amazing to receive! Heaps of love to you!
Lovelies... first of all... thank you! so refreshing and enlightening your relationship on such an authentic view... thank you for sharing your journey with us...
Also.. theme suggestion:
Holding space tips for the extreme bumpy moments, as in both of you are feeling challenged...
I'd love to know how you manage these!
Lots of loveeee Ri
Hi Ri! Thanks so much for reaching out and for all your support and loveee! It feels so amazing to receive! This is a great topic idea. We would love to talk more about this. Thank you and lots of love to you!
I could never live like this but I still like watching your videos. I get a little sad because it seems like you both genuinely really love each other and I don't get the need to sleep with other people. To me, you can connect in so many other ways and sex isn't necessary to 'seal the deal.' But that's just me. I appreciate all three (!!) of your channels all for different reasons. To me, this all sounds like a big struggle somehow, especially on Conor's part but I'm sure he'd beg to differ. It's almost like a free pass to just screw around but when you're saying it's for growth, I dunno - 'lipstick on a pig' is a little harsh, but it just doesn't feel right....... but that's just me! :) Keep on making the videos - I really do watch them all - they make me think. :)
Thanks for reaching out and sharing more of your experience here. I can really understand all of the things that you are expressing. We so appreciate you watching our videos and love that you are doing things the way that feels best for you! We love that!
Yes - totally. I'm always open to listening to others and how they think. I especially liked the one about getting over a habit because you're not dealing with uncomfortable feelings. You guys really are a trip....and in the best way.
haha thank you
Connor and Brittany are very physical people, they love bodies. For such a long time, I had a VERY difficult time understanding polyamory and their mindset concerning commitment and intimacy while sharing other people. I finally was able to experience this as a demisexual without leaving my sexuality! It's a very beautiful thing : )
Thanks for sharing yourselves so openly with us....
I find you both so courageous, authentic living is not for the meek. ;) Your love is palpable
As always your message has helped me on my journey through life. I learn so much in all of your videos and it has nothing to do with sex even! I learn how to be a more calming and understanding individual and how to maintain happy and healthy relationships. Whether it is with my friends,family,or god ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Love seeing how you both look at each other! ❤️
Thank you so much :). We love looking at each other. And it's so great to get to share here.
I love the adoration I see in your guys eyes when you look at each other. And pausing for that kiss? Felt totally natural and really made me smile! (And...might have made my heart skip a beat! 😉) You two have wonderful chemistry and I just love you both!
I wanted to make a cool comment on this cool cool cool video, and the only word that keeps coming up is “Growth”... so I Googled the synonyms and these words felt good... breakthrough, betterment, development, enrichment, expansion, improvement, prosperity, cultivation, evolution, flowering, maturation, unfolding, EVOLVEMENT :) So cool to see. Thank ya’ll for sharing, again... and much LOVE to you both
"and the only word that keeps coming up is “Growth”"
:)
I love this Tyna!!!!
legitimately in love with you guys. you guys inspire me so much every single day.
I would love to see something about your views on religion. love you guys and you inspire me to be myself and not form to standards. thank you for being a positive light, you guys have the purest hearts.
We really believe whatever is serving someone else is awesome. We are both believers in much that we can not see or quantify. Energy, love, the god within all us- these are very real concepts to us and where we place our highest trust. Thanks for asking!
This is so awesome! Thanks for being so REAL ❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️
You are so welcome!
Thank you for being so honest, always.
Thank you so much for sharing and making these videos, it is amazing to get a different perspective on relationships. I know alternatives exist but so often it is taboo to talk about it, and I think that is dangerous and also harmful because then people are boxed into thinking that relationships should be one way and cause someone to shy away from their authentic self and not be authentic within a relationship because it doesn't fit the narrow view of what a relationship is/isn't.
Yes. Exactly. Wonderfully written
I really want to know how you guys totally get rid of those scary, jealousy & fearful abandonment feelings within your relationship. Its so hard for me to imagine being okay with seeing someone you love go be sexual with another or risk losing them. idk. It would be great to not have negative emotions. ❤✌
This was awesome! Thank you guys for this!
I love all this and the two of you seem to have done a lot of growth and ground work in order to make this possible and be excited for it all even in times of fear. I think some videos on exactly the tools you use to confront tough things like fear and jealousy would be helpful. Most people don't have a way to process in a productive way or have good coping skills or may not know how to be in that triggered space w/o flipping out. You can say that you are excited for how this enhances your life and how the fear is ok.. but how exactly do you get to that place ? :)
Wonderful. We will absolutely mae a video about this
I worried that Conor was about to cry but was trying to hold it back. This is a tough video to digest for a ton of reasons.
I like crying. When it comes I'm so down to just let it go. I wasn't really feeling that in this video but I think I could see what you are talking about. Thanks for the comment! -Conor
I absolutely loved this, so raw and beautiful 💟
I have been pondering this question. Do you connect with people who consume animals/animal products?
Thank u so much. I love u two a lot and learning from u so much about my open relationship.
We love you right back. Thank you so much for the support
I can relate so much. Thank you so much for sharing. I can really use this !!
I am so glad to hear this! Thank you for watching!!!
You both are so beautiful humans beenings :) Thank you so much for sharing this!
You are so welcome. Thank you for the loving and supportive comment
100% understandning here. Thank you so much for sharing your..like, life experience, really interesting and helpful
Just helps to figure out how life works ^^
I 've had the same experience in my relationship lately with honesty, and it's been exactly like you're shift and just changed everything so much
Funny how these kind of videos always seem to appear after an own epiphany like that
That is funny. Serendipitous. Thanks for watching and commenting. Pretty sure we will keep aligning in this way ;)
your intentions are to be so commiyed to one another, but what if when conflict arises my intention is not to commit, but the opposite? it makes it difficult to move forward with someone.
wow. U two totally and completely inspire me. I stumbled on this page because ofmy own relationship struggles and this is exactly what i needed. The honesty nd divine love is so apparent and jumps through the screen. I feel so loved and supported in this moment having seen u two. Blessed. thnksfor posting!:)
Wow. This is so beautiful. Thank you so much. We are honored! Heaps of love to you!
Hey Connor and Brittany. Thank you for sharing your experiences! I was feeling into the story and started wondering... It seems like the part of Conor that felt fear is maybe an "exile" part and therefore, it seemed like very small in the beginning. When Conor had the chance to feel into himself, it actually just became more clear that it was there to begin with. Within this video it seemed to me like he started telling himself that whatever would happen in the future outside of him would be beneficial to him. This felt not so good for me, for two reasons. First, it seems like the outcome of every experience has to be: we always want to stay open to connecting to other human beings. Would it not be more open / fluid and in the moment to not have that fixed outcome? It would feel more organic to me if it would also be okay to be open to other human beings until one of the two feels like he or she is in the proces of integrating parts and therefore feel into if it really feels save to have the other person connect with other humans, in that moment. That also can again change afterwards, right? The other thing is, safety cannot be found in the outcome of you two staying in connection. Wouldn't it feel more integrated/save if even when the connection between Brittany and the other human would grow and would take energy away from what is between the two of you, that would also be an okay outcome? The safety would than come from finding safety within the Self.
Hi Judith! Totally exile based with some beautiful protectors taking close care. The IFS explanation of the experience would be a little different than what I shared in this video. I LOVE LOVE LOVE your observations and they truly make sense. Safety outside of Self is not my desire but the narrative, "this serves me because I choose it [from a place of Self]" does and that is what I was feeling. I am so open to exploring this more too, thank you for the message
Nice to hear your reply! I absolutely believe that the way the two of you are connecting with each other and other humans is what you desire and therefore, comes from Self. Maybe it was also a bit a projection, because when my exile parts would play up it would feel more save for me to be honest with that and say; I would love for us to not connect with others in this moment, but am still willing to find out when that feels save again. As you said in the video, apparently you are moving through this actually quite fast now. I just love how you two are birthing a new kind of relating awareness. Since there is not so big a field of this awareness out there, I would imagine talking it slow while moving forward in connection would sometimes be a loving way to grow. Love, Judith
Just reading this now--- thank you so much for the reply! ooo feels really good to read this all Judith. Love your reflection and the reflection you have inspired in myself! So much love to you! -Conor
“Not about tolerating”👏👏👏👏👏
I love the way you look at each other.
We really love looking at each other!
It feels good!
Thank you for your honesty! Much love. :)
Thank you for watching and for your support! Much love to you!
I understand what you two are saying, but for me I just could not be comfortable with the person I love even flirting with another girl.... I feel like if he truly loves me and is my soulmate he should be fulfilled by me. Thoughts?
That is awesome! We love that you know what you want. We don't have a desire for anyone to do anything like us. We really just want to share in our hopes that some of what comes up for us, regardless of the type of relationship one is in or wants to be in, is useful. Thanks for asking!
love you guys !!! you make me smile :)
I love the shit out of you guys! you are so sweet and thank you thank you for sharing this
Ah, this feels amazing! Thank you for watching! We love the shit out of you!
I understand growth. But life can push us to grow in so many ways, however as a mother I could not personally teach this by example. In my heart I know. Is your fear, your reflections balanced. Found.
Conor, I love the little bloop on the back of your head... almost a man bun! I DO NOT think you are being dumb at all! My husband is 14 years younger than me, and we have been married 15 years. I have a lot of bad dreams where he dumps me for a younger woman, but in real life I refuse to be afraid! I let it go. I blow it away, scattering it into the universe, and I am happy.😘
Melissa, The love of my life was 17 years younger than me and it was the most amazing and fulfilling relationship I've ever had. I am so glad you got to marry yours and you dont let those fears get the best of you! Enjoy ALL of it! Mine passed away suddenly and I am so grateful for the time I had with him. Be happy and definitely cancel those bad dreams! Cancel and erase them for they are not worthy of your time. Tammie Miller
You're awesome! Thank you for all of this
THANK you. your words resonate with me so much
Thank you so much for watching! We are so glad to hear this!
I wasn't insinuating they should put the specific names out I was asking about using the WORD human instead of the word people or person.
i love you guys! past and present and future yous !
I'm interested to know if the two of you have ever considered monogamy with one another? Is it an option at all? Love your videos!
Thanks for asking! We talk about this in our first Q&A here: ruclips.net/video/7JukcvP2jBg/видео.htmlm31s I hope that's helpful! Love to you!
I LOVE YOU GUYS
Can I ask, what if one of you decides you can't cope at all with another person involved. That you only want each other forever. Do you honour that? xx
Thanks for reaching out about this. This has never come up for us, but if it did I know we would communicate about it in a loving way and figure out how it made sense for both of us to move forward. We also talk more about this topic here if you are interested: ruclips.net/video/7JukcvP2jBg/видео.htmlm31s Thanks again for writing! xoxo
I'm curious why you use the word Human when your referring to people as if it would be something else?
I imagine it is because they would like to honor the other person's privacy and keep it vague on purpose..
Ooh, thanks for asking! It feels like such a nice, all-encompassing word to us! I like seeing and feeling people as their own, full human selves and not thinking of them as in a group of people that has a potential label on them. Thanks for the chance to ponder this more!
I love the video! Just sometimes the wind in the microphone is way too loud :(
Love you both anyways :)
Is there a difference between being in a polyamorous relationship and being a swinger?
Well just googling those terms I found that Swinger is defined as :"The definition of a swinger is slang for someone who lives an uninhibited lifestyle. A person who engages freely in experimental sexual behavior is an example of a swinger." And polyamory is defined as: "the philosophy or state of being in love or romantically involved with more than one person at the same time." I suppose we sort of fall into both categories. I also think these words have different meanings for different people. We have personally never resonated with the word "swinger" so we don't use it. For us that term holds a certain emotionally detached feeling that we don't ascribe to in our connections. Thanks for asking. Fun to think about. Much love to you.
Love you guys.
Love you!!
I think for me one big challenge (of many) in an open relationship would be trusting the other person this way *with my life*. That is, trusting that they would always practice safe sex, including the mouth. Even very healthy-looking/speaking ppl can have STDs. And sometimes that condom malfunctions ... and then the possibility of being impregnated by the person being invited into the relationship, a major change in the relatioinship... It's nice to speak of all the love and rainbows aspect of it, but all that can change in a heartbeat with just one bad choice, or just some freak thing. I'm not saying what you're doing is "bad," just very risky, and not to be taken lightly. I'd wanna make sure the f*ck was worth all the risk. And really, that is the appropriate word, because real love isn't instantaneous, it's something that comes over time with many real and varied experiences. Once cultivated with one person, I'd wanna make sure any risks with it (and the additional risks mentioned) were very worthy.
I was speaking in 3rd person in my earlier comment and I came across strangely. Anyway, I edited so I made more sense! LOL! Tammie
Goals*
You rockkkk! So awesome to meet you today! We are pumped to have more time together at the stock next month!
Yeah cant wait!
I'm in love with both of you ahhhh
I cant shake the feeling that Brittany is more manipulative than in authentic good faith
Wow guys. You are so beautiful!!!