These comments are giving me life. Everybody here is so open hearted and not focused on the color of people and it's beautiful. The man I plan to spend the rest of my life with could be any color of the rainbow and I would still love him. He's the rock of our blended family. And a man of a man.
Putting color above the individual is Fascism, and that's not a conservative thing, thats a progr..communist thing, almost said progressive but that's just a pretty term for commie
White women are generally prettier, generally better personality, and generally have more common interest. I’m Chinese and dating a Chinese woman for the first time in my life, and I’m probably going back to white women. Once you go white, it’s hard to go back.
I married a black woman,she worked as a nurse for Baylor Scott and White for 30 years. Great woman!!! And she's a christian woman,God gave me a great woman.
I was taught Martin Luther King Jr. in school, growing up. I was taught that someone's skin has zero to do with their personality. So I don't see people of another race as "they," or "them," I see them as "us." I've dated women that aren't my race and never thought anything of it. By today's standards I'm told that this method of thinking is racism.
You got a good one... most good black women are open to interracial dating. Not to mention white men also treat black women better than black men! I bet your wife is a natural black women! I’m a black woman who’s married to an Arab and he embraces my natural hair more than my ex black boyfriends! 😂
That you 'ever' meant even more than your own mother? Wow. I don't like when people say ever or the most that is coming on a little strong and to me almost trying people like God. All you had to say was a beautiful soul not the most I ever meant in the whole world lol The only one that is perfect and the most is Jesus
I happened to be there when a coworker was challenged by another black man on why on earth he would marry a white woman. His answer touched my heart. He said he didnt just fall in love with his wife, he fell in love with her whole family. He grew up in the city, with an angry single mom. When he met his wife in college and they dated a few times she asked him to come home for a weekend with her family. He slept on their couch for 3 night's ( she had standards, was not a sleep around girl) and was right there innthe center of the home to see everything that went on. He said he loved the way her sisters respected their daddy. He loved the way her mama and daddy talked over decisions together. He loved the gentle teasing, the appreciation of each other, the sweet laughter. He loved the way her big brothers were proud of their wives and babies. This was the family life he never had, and he realized this was a woman he could create this kind of life with. Now they've been going strong for 30 years. Raised 3 beautiful girls. Been through all lifes ups and downs and they always have each other's back. Its a beautiful thing!
Cute story but I call bs. I have a great blk family and blk men with angry single moms always seemed to be jealous of my good family. I had one man try to divide my family because he was so jealous. We are just plagued with the yt is right and blk men are weaker than their women. They fell for the okie dokie and instead of conquering yt men, they are conquered. Therefore yt men are able to run the world and impose their views and ways of the world. So internally, you viewed that yt woman as better before you knew her family. You are probably being mistreated and don’t even know it. They probably have more sympathy for you than they like you. It does yt people good to help the poor little blk kid and your wife knows she will always have a social economical advantage over you. That’s what she wants. Yt women like blk men because they could be that lead in the house that she can’t get with yt men. Did you see Shaka Zulu? Look at the difference between you and Shaka. Shaka made the village bow down and respect his single mama and made her queen and punished anybody who ever devalued her including his own daddy. You and other blk men are conquered so you have to diss your mother whom womb you were made in, uplift the people who are on top because they’re ancestors defeated your ancestors, and bow down to the narrative, because you are conquered. You are not strong enough to build a village so you have to impose on another man’s village. Blk men like yt women because they are defeated, couldn’t uplift his own people so they have to impose on other Patriarchs. And in your case, matriarch because since you have a defeated culture, yt women will always be above you and the lead of your relationship and you have to be the submissive one because you let your culture fail. Did you ever stop to think that because our men let our culture get defeated; that’s why your mother is bitter.
"He grew up in the city, with an angry single mom." blaming black women for his taste in snow bunnies... His mother has nothing to do with the millions of other black women out there. LOL.
@@chrispowers627 it's a beautiful thing when different cultures & ethnic groups mix, my family is very diverse, I'm white Latino but my daughters mom is black, wish u the best friend
Amen to that! Good luck with your search! She’s out there looking for you two. Never loose the faith! She will be worth the wait. Pray for her so when you find her, YOU can tell her you’ve been praying for her happiness, her peace’s, her success, until she found you! God Bless!
I am married to a black woman and to be honest, most of the time I forget we are even a different race because she is my best friend. Often times people enter relationships for reasons not predicated on race or fetish, but because they actually love that person. Shocking isn't it? Imagine that...you can actually be with someone and love them regardless of their skin color. Who knew? 🙄
No such thing as race….all are humans Some have different genetics that determine different attributes So at most you could say there are different species of Homo sapiens
@@galatrax1181 Well, I would agree and state that race is essentially a social contruct and does not exist in the way that we have been indoctrinated to believe. Mind you, non-African people do possess a marginal amount of Neanderthal DNA that Africans do not, but that does not indicate that we are separate species by any stretch of the imagination.
@@travisreifke4356 in regards to neanderthal DNA, that contradicts your point about "race is a social construct'. Different races evolved in vastly different climates, and so certain Genes either evolved through mutation or become more strongly expressed through natural selection. Culture is a social construct, absolutely. I think the backlash against "race" is due to the outdated belief from pre 1930s that blood and breeding, 'race' etc. Determined your place in society instead of ability and merit. The Eugenics movent in America and Europe culminated horribly in Nazi Germany. The answer to that really terrible shit is to give everyone an equal opportunity to succeed on their own merits and reward success, something that the Far Left of today wants to replace with a new and insidious form of separation via "race".
@@NoneMcNobody It's not a contradiction at all. I stated that it is a MARGINAL difference in DNA. So...race is indeed a social construct. What I mean by that is that homosapians are essentially all the same genetically. Our differences are trivial at best and do not separate us in profound ways like race purists and extremists like to mythologically claim.
It’s very simple. They marry who they marry because they’re attracted to them physically and emotionally. People who aren’t racist don’t look for a spouse based on race.
I’m a black man from the hood who grew up around black women so I dated black women all of my life but in high school I got in some trouble and went to live with my uncle who lived in the suburbs and I met a white girl and in the beginning I was just planning my on having sex with her because I never been with a white woman at that point so I was like why not let me give it a try . I thought it would be boring and that we’d have nothing in common but it turns out I got more in common with her than I have with any woman I ever been with up to that point.I want people to realize that everybody got the same issues growing up just in different settings so don’t be afraid to date outside your race you might meet your soul mate .
If you’re are regular “average” black man you’re more like to relate to them than black woman. Average regular normal life style is like bug repellent to a roach. They do not like average for whatever reason but that right up white womans alley
So she saved you you know we have already heard this 2000 million times not very new . What did you want a cookie. Black love isn't put on a shelf and then presto you found a Barbie doll. I will say this you didn't waste anytime securing her in your new found environment.
yeah really...such lovely words.Now and go and live in a majority black enviroment.You will soon have a new found respect and love for the people you were born into.
This might sound a bit brutal but (real) black women arent very attractive at all...remember Tiger Woods and all those WHITE women he had affairs with were all whiter than white with nearly all of them from the likes of Sweden and Austria etc etc but Tiger Woods wasnt a true black man because his Mum was Taiwanese i think
As a South East Asian guy who grew up in a diversified city in California; I often tell many people to date for the ideals rather than the looks or skin color. My first serious relationship along with engagement was with a white girl I met at church. She took care of me better than all the other Asian and Hispanic girls that I tried dating. Sometimes God throws curve ball at us and we ended up being happy from situations we could never guess. After a painful long 10 years of dating around with girls of all colors; I ended up marrying a Asian girl who was the least type of race of girl that I suspect I would ever marry since many previous Asian girls I dated were bullshiating around a lot. Sometimes you just never give up and keep on dating until you find out which girl is for you. I had to go through about 7-10 ex white girlfriends, 3-4 Asian exs, and 2-3 Hispanic ex to finally find out that another Asian girl in the future would end up being my wife. The sad thing was that most of the white girls who I dated accepted who I am and respected me more than all the Asian and Hispanic girls that I tried to date. I find out that it was my spiritual faith and tenacious attitude in not being a wimp that proved that I wasn't some chump in the street. Reason why the Asian and Hispanic girls I dated was such a low count was that those numbers were from a much larger group of girls that didn't cut out to be decent. Some would say why I didn't date black girls; it was that the black population in my city was extremely low and I had no access to trying to date black girls. I did met a few Black Puerto Rican and Dominican Republican black girls who did catch my eye; but I can never get them to click it with me so that's why I had no black ex-gfs. Either way; best of luck to all those who are still trying to date around! Life is tough so never give up and find that person who follows your philosophy rather than your looks!
My uncle married a much younger black woman. They've been married for 21 years, 2 children. We thought he'd never get married and we were so ecstatic that he found a loving wife. Her family finally excepted their marriage after much pushback and opposition. I asked her why she chose a white man to marry and she said "I chose your uncle because I love him n we are best friends and because I wanted a husband a father to my children that would be there for us." Beautiful family 21 years later. ❤😇
@@TheUzamaki1234 you'd have to ask her. What I took from it was that she had experiences of her own within her family and culture to know what it was she wanted in a husband and what she didn't want. She made her choice based upon that and has been a happily married woman ever since. Her family were the only one's in opposition to the marriage. Cultural differences, not racial. You'll see it from whichever angle you choose.
Over 20 years ago I worked in a nursing home in Idaho. There was a white woman who’s black husband came in every day to feed her all her meals. I can’t imagine what they went through in their time. I would have loved to known their love story.
They probably didn't go through much. Maybe a few sneers and leery-eyed looks here and there, but most people aren't as prejudiced as the Iibtards would have you believe.
@@kropking Depends on the generation to be fair. OP probably refering to an older couple. Sneers and looks can build up over time and affect a person. But you're right about nowadays. Few people are racist and if you are you're really viewed as a freak these days.
My mother always told my sister and me, it's not about his race, it's about whether he's a true God fearing Christian man and, how he treats you. Love is love regardless of race.
I’m a Black woman and my husband is Kurdish. We have a good relationship and we’re building a home together. I dated black men, white men, Arabic and it was my husband that won my heart. Why? He genuinely likes my heart. My looks and body are a plus for him. I feel the same. His heart is what makes him a real catch. Thank you God ❤🎉
I'm a Black married 11.5 years to a wonderful White man. I come from a 2 parent home. My Mom was a homemaker. My parents taught us the importance of God, love, family, and home. My Honey 🍯 is very country, and I love his personality, jokes, and the way he speaks.🥰 It is extremely important to me our home is drama free, but filled with warmth, joy, and love.
Good for you. You can't go wrong with a strong country man. He will love you to the end of days and be the man you always dreamed of. God Bless and enjoy life's blessings, because God is Color Blind.
Did you there feel was a disconnect in your marriage because of the race difference? For example, I'm not black, but my dad is and I'm dating a white woman. I remember a white woman who was friends with hersaid the n word in a casual way and I didn't think I heard her right so I brought it up to my girlfriend and we had a huge argument about it and it wasnt really resolved until I brought it up to my sister much later. When I talk with her dad about politics I feel like I'm defending my existence and she'll stand right next to me and never backs me up on this
I have been very blessed to be raised in a family that did not discriminate. I have many relatives who are married interracially black, Asian, etc. My mom is Native American and my dad is German. So we are definitely a melting pot of love regardless of race.
As a black woman in a mixed marriage for 17 yrs. I think culture is the #1 thing for us black people that married outside of our race. I agree with you.
Congrats You're one of the 26% of black women who be married in their lifetime. And you're part of that 3.5% of all black women in an interracial marriage. You're the unicorn. -Kevin Samuels
Darn it you shattered my dreams, I love Dr. Ben Carson he is so handsome and smart & my vote for whatever office he chooses to run for. Thanks for sharing some of your personal life❤
I love your perspective. I’m married to a Hispanic man. He is the first relationship I had outside of black men. I always had an attraction to all races but particularly black men because I grew up in an area where there were mostly black men. Then I fell in love with a Hispanic man and married him. Period. Nothing else behind it. I remember a black young man being celebrated because of his college grades or something of the sort and I clapped and one of my friends turned around and made a comment like “you’re married to a Mexican” as if I didn’t appreciate or could not appreciate a black man being successful because I am not married to one. I think that people assume that when you marry out of your own race that you don’t like your race. Not true. I was raised to love who you love no matter their color. Great content Tatum.
@Mia Omiah I would say that it was mostly a bad experience. I do not think it had anything to do with them being black men because I married at 21 so all of my experience dating black men were in high school. At that time they were still very young men and not looking for anything serious it seems. Also I will have to add that although my husband is Hispanic he grew up in foster care for most of his life and he was raised by an African American man so the way he treats me isn’t influenced by hispanic culture. I always said I would marry a black man and have a chocolate baby lol funny how life ends up.
I don't understand why so many Black Americans think it's being a traitor to marry an opposite color race. When I was young, in the 70's and 80's a lot of interracial marriages occurred. Now I'm hearing things that are going backwards on this subject. Who has been teaching the Black population to stay segregated? That's truly a cynical way of thinking, and totally racist.
@Like Magic While that may have been true before the Civil Rights Bill, it certainly hasn't been after that legislation. What difference does it make what color you are? It's only melanin. The inside of everyone's palm is the same color. Go figure. Hindi people are Black too. Lot's of different races are Black, White, Brown, Red, Yellow.
My husband is black. His first wife was black. He never talked bad about her. He said they just grew apart. They were like roommates in the same house. He said he wanted to make the marriage work, so he tried to take steps to get things together. But, they just didn’t. So, he moved out, and they mutually decided to divorce. He was with her 17 years. He adopted her daughter as his own. His daughter was grown by this time. He owned his own home, and his ex owns her own. She never had a problem until he got together with me. Then, she was calling him almost every day. She started showing up at our church. She would sneer at me. She would take jabs at me when she spoke with him on the phone, and he would always have their conversations on speaker. (I didn’t ask him to, but he said it was out of respect for me.) She absolutely couldn’t stand that he’d married a white woman. She said it was because he could control me…and he loved control she said. His daughter tried to break us up. When she couldn’t, she stopped speaking to him. He always spoke respectfully to his ex regardless of how she spoke to him; but, he wouldn’t allow her to disrespect me. He would say, “She’s my wife now. I need you to not disrespect her.” She would then rant and sneer, “YOUR WIFE. YOUR WIFE. WELL, WE CAN’T HAVE ANYONE DISRESPECTING YOUR WIFE.” She would want to speak with him in private at church, until he said, “Anything you have to say, you will have to say it in front of my wife.” She didn’t ask to speak with him in private or at all anymore. Last year, his daughter died unexpectedly. He still grieves over their lost relationship because he’d raised her since she was seven. He only found out when his ex called him after she’d been buried. She asked him once what kind of message does it send the grandkids that he married a white woman. He said, it sends the message that you marry who you love.
That sucks. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I'm a young 29-year-old Black male. I've dated Black women over the years and I'm looking more toward dating out to other races of women. I've experienced being more on the same page with other races of women because I have a conservative mindset and most Black women are heavily liberal minded. It's unfortunate but I'm tired of having the same dead-end results of not moving on with life and not getting married and starting a family with a woman I can trust. Color at this point is of no importance as long as they have similar values that I have.
ASK GOD to bring you the right one. I did and now happily married almost 50 yrs! God knows you better than u know yourself and He KNOWS the right person for you and how to bring her to you. Go for it! worked for me! @@DemetriT1
Totally agree! I've dated black men, Hispanic men, white men, and it just didn't matter - the best one stuck around and he is who he is. It isn't about what he looks like, it's who he is on the inside. He's a man willing to lovingly raise another man's child and he works hard to provide for all of us. He's a damn good man, no matter what he looks like on the outside.
There’s a difference between getting married and keeping a marriage. A lot of woman thinks about getting married but forget to focus on how to keep a marriage alive and it’s a lot of work.
@@deliriouswhome1 Did that guy failed? Or did the guy gave up trying? That’s another situation even tho it goes both way’s there’s still the lack of accountability. A lot of time people hate being hold accountable for their actions. From my experience my ex couldn’t never hold herself accountable without dragging me along with her to the point that I just gave up trying because I already know how it will end.
@M W ummmmm, that seems like an opinion not a fact. Porn does have an affect on people but don’t know if is the cause on why marriages gets ruined. And no, what went wrong in my relationship is that I got tired of her dragging me down with her when I tell her what she done.
@@will1905 your right people do tend to not want to hold themselves accountable sometimes, that includes yourself. I don't really see the value of being in relationship and once that relationship end pointing fingers. It doesn't honestly matter why the relationship didn't work out, the fact is it just didn't. There always something an individual can learn to do better going into Thier next relationship.
My boyfriend and I met on tinder and just immediately hit it off so dang well. The difference in our skin colors isn’t a factor in our relationship. We care about each other’s hearts, we are there for each other in important ways. This man is my heart’s treasure ❤
It’s about character and culture. I’m a black woman and I’ve never thought badly of black men who date out. It’s strange to me that some members of the black community get upset about interracial dating. You love who you love. 💯❤️ I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with having a preference or “fetish.” Attraction is important. Anyone who says otherwise is delusional.
I agree... But I don't think that skin color preference is preference is technically a So called fetish.. But I will agree to a certain facial structures Or textures of the body can definitely be linked Rasa itself.. For instance if someone likes a person with freckles then generally most of the time of that person is black they're gonna end up dating someone who is white or biracial cause very few black people are born with freckles..
I also don't know what's wrong with "fetish" the word has a bad reputation after all those movies about serial k1llers. but ask any man and he will tell you what his "fetish" is - for example, long hair, big whatever, small whatever. I think it's the same for women - some have 'fetishes' for specific height, voice, complexion, etc. Only transhumanist genderless robots could have problems understanding these basic human things.
I'm Mexican and my wife is white (Irish/ Italian). Honestly, i didn't look "within my own race" for a partner because it's in the Latin culture to want to fight constantly. I tried that kind of relationship and it killed me Inside. My wife is perfect. I am by no means a flawless individual, but we both work off each other and we make each other better. She works, I'm a stay at home dad (work injury) and we make it work.
To want to fight? Never saw our culture like that. Us Latinas are just feisty. Handle it or don’t, you didn’t. You just found your one outside of our culture. Nothing to do with “fighting”. Most Latino families are muy cariñosos. Sorry yours fought.
Bro, respect to you and your lovely wife. You didn't want to fight constantly and you married an Irish Girl?!?! Us Scotts and Irish are like the Snow Giant Latinos of the north with fire for hair and much shittier food and weather. Italians; two words....Roman Empire! They're OG Latinos! Notre Dames called "The Fighting Irish" for a reason dude. I do applaud your tastes as I also married an Irish/Italian girl. :-)
@@barbaraa.6190 Latinos r feisty so ye we do have more arguments. Every family get together is so angry. Everytime I party with whit friends families, they never fight
@@JonathanGillies No I'm not unfortunately and I'm pretty sure that's what every person would say and if he was here today, all these woke people would get cancelled.
Oh Boy, here we go. Well all I will say is too each his/her own. And if you like white women, then have it. For me, it will always be "Black Women" and nothing but Black Women. I have been with my beautiful "Black" wife for 32 yrs, married for 24 of them. And it just doesn't get any better. And as far as "Culture" as you say, we have a lot in common. And yes we both grew up with "2" parents. And my father was a good black man and though he died young, he was definitely a good husband to my mother, a good provider. And a great father to his 4 children. You don't need to have a white girl to find that. But like you said, it's all about love. And for me, "I Love My People".
Some of the issues black men don’t want to speak about in reference to dating white women. It is easier to put the majority of the issues on black women. But never self-hatred or the many other things that black men that are human beings carry.
As a Black woman, I want to know. Why does it even matter who someone chooses to marry?! It bothers me that it's still a discussion today Marriage is about a partnership also and he found his partner. Please let's just focus on that fact that we are called to love and the color shouldn't matter.
" *Why does it even matter who someone chooses to marry?* " Our lives are ours, we dont owe an explanation to anyone (aside from maybe a loving relative that wants to make sure we're picking someone good for ourselves), especially strangers, as to why we've chosen the people in our lives for ourselves. Doubly so if their questioning is based solely on skin color.
@@TheUzamaki1234 my comment was not directed toward men only. We all need to focus on being kind and loving and thats according to the Word. As far as a partner, it's your choice who you love but don't make the choice based on others opinions. Have a great night!
You know the answer. As long as there is a political party that is constantly injecting race into EVERY aspect of everyday life there will always be racial tension. What party benefits from the racial tension? Which party beats that drum even when there is absolutely no racial reason to do so?
If the only thing you have in common with your significant other is race, then you're probably in the wrong relationship. In my opinion, race shouldn't be the single most important criteria for choosing a mate. I think it's ok to have a preference...whether someone is your race or not; but ultimately, the one you choose should share your values.
100% agree Ofc Tatum...as a black man. I grew up in a diverse community, attended majority white schools, dated my fair share of black women, and ended up marrying a white woman. Culture plays a role, but like anything, you love what or who you love. I think black ppl hate on blacks that are in interracial relationships/marriages bc they were told to marry a "strong black woman/man", and that white ppl already have it all, that we need to stick together. It's instilled in some black families to not stray from their race and that is the mindset that goes back decades that unfortunately still exist today. But like Ofc Tatum said, love should be the reason with all the other characteristics of why you marry whomever.
@@RealmCenter40 I mostly witness what you're referring to in social media platforms. That's where bigots have the courage to spew their foolishness. Other than that, I know it exist in the real world, but not nearly the rate the media wants citizens to believe.
@@RealmCenter40 The left are more against interracial dating then anybody else. Because they're the ones who promotes crt, which also mocks people in interracial relationships.
@@hellomikie92 The left are the culprits dating back to slavery. They owned more slaves than anyone. Most ppl don't even know that, but yes they hate interracial couples, that's why it's funny Kamala snuck in as Vice P.
My aunt married a black American man. He's been a God send to our family. I've learned all my carpentry skills from him. Our family sees no color. Only the character of the man!
@Bleu Barclay you just proved 2 points about yourself... 1st you're the true rassist in this comment section. 2nd You're not the sharpest tool in the shed!!!
This is 💯 spot on. The race thing was always so odd to me. Race was not even a discussion in our house. I had posters of crushes of every color on my wall as a kid. When my grandmother spoke about people, which was rare, it was always in terms of behavior and character, never race.
Are you absolutely blind ? Tatum spent the entire video glorifying the so called white culture as doing better. Saying they are more likely to have a father and mother. Statistically that is inaccurate even if you believe it to be true no one can address why
@@mikem4481 Oh, for Pete's sake, Mike. You are reading your own energies into her comment! Kids have "favorites" while they are growing, exploring and shaping their own individuality. Maybe if YOU put a poster on your wall, YOU might be "lusting" (I don't know), but kids are not going to feel the same as a grown man. All you do is reveal yourself in your comment and "scold" others because you are condemning yourself. And because of self-absorption, you totally miss her fine point that she was fortunate to be raised in a family where she was not burdened with judging people for their race. You would enjoy life more if you lifted your awareness more heavenward rather than downward.
It’s not about the color of skin. It’s about attraction, love has no boundaries. We Fall in love with another person for reasons outside of skin color. Politicians make this an issue. Officer Tatum is spot on again. Thank you for bringing this issue to light.
I had a black boyfriend for a while. I didn't care that he was black, but slowly he revealed that it bothered him that I was white. He was charming in the beginning, but his true feelings came out. He complained that I dressed white, listened to white music, ate white food, had white hobbies, etc. I never thought about those things before. I was just being myself. He was always talking about how people reacted or didn't react to us as a mixed couple. I never noticed those things either. Suddenly my whole world was about everything being "black" or "white". When we went to black areas or to his family's house, they treated me with disdain. My family didn't treat him like that. It was like he woke up every day and said, "OMG, I'm black, and it's all Whitey's fault". He left me for another white woman, and she was blond. With all of his hatred of whites, I guess I was not white enough for him. I moved on and found a man like myself, and it was nice to talk about things besides "black" and "white". Things like "let's go for a hike". I know not all black men are like this, but I could never understand if he despised whites so much, then why would he choose them for girlfriends and then treat them badly?
I’m so sorry that this happened to you. I’m a black girl and my black brother told me that he’s would never date a white woman because of their music, flat asses, sensitive skin and their boring jokes and personality. I asked him why he would say such a thing and his black girlfriends make boring jokes too!! He kept quiet about it. I think you should maybe find someone that matches your personality. ❤❤❤
As a black male, I found it easier to fall in love with a girl who simply understood who I was. It sounds crazy but growing up, I was never perceived as “black enough” by white and black women as well as other races because I was “too kind” & “too compassionate.” That man you dated probably didn’t like you because you didn’t fit his standard of a white woman. He probably wanted a white girl who loved everything he did. I’m not saying it was right how he treated you at all but love is a dangerous game. But I will clarify that in my personal opinion? There is nothing wrong with having a racial preference in love. I’ll never treat a girl wrong or another race from me but I do lean towards lightskins or white girls.
he kinda missed the whole point of dating someone from a different race or cultural background. The point is to merge or integrate. I'm thinking of dating a white girl too
I dealt with the same thing, and the funny thing is is that he acted more white than I did and I acted more black being the white woman! I realized after dating black men that they were the prejudice ones full of hate! again, I don’t understand why they would date white women if they hate white people so much it doesn’t make sense! And that’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard that we supposedly don’t have personalities. I find the complete opposite. I have a huge personality and I have a big butt. We don’t all have flat asses! that’s literally the reason why black guys are hitting on me is just because I happen to have a booty! Which is ridiculous. I’m more than my body and want to be valued! I’m now dating a Puerto Rican man and I’ve never been so happy. He treats me the best.
He just sounds confused and ignorant. I'm black and I've dated women who were black, white, asian, latin, german, middle eastern, etc. It's a freedom to experience your life without worrying about what other ppl think or say. I think it's crazy when I hear some of my ppl say 🗣️"a black man wants to date a white women to act white" or "he dates outside his race because he hates black women". 😑 How in the hell is that possible when my mom (🙏🏾🕊️💓) was a black woman who I dearly loved and she loved me, and my aunts, cousins, and grandmothers were also black women? 😑 That's the dumbest 💩 I've ever heard in my life and unfortunately some black folks constantly reiterate that, and sadly it's usually black women. It's especially ignorant considering that although I have friends of different races, most of my childhood friends or friends I've made later on in life are predominantly black. Being a black man in this world can be challenging but from my own experience it also brings a certain element of charm and mystery when it comes to dating. I've been approached and have approached women from different countries that were beautiful, gentle, and not materialistic. I don't know if me being black had anything to do with that but I like to think it's part of the reason as well as my personality.
I definitely agree on this one. I didn't choose my husband because he's white, I chose him because we have the same values, similar sense of humor, and he's very supportive.
@@ShifuCareaga we are out there lol . I am one and know others as well. But I agree that it might be difficult to find especially when we may not voice our political beliefs right away.
I married a Korean and I’m half white / Native American. He’s my best friend and the love of my life. We balance each other out and understand each other. We just clicked and didn’t look at who we are on the outside , but who we are in the inside. We love each other ❤️
What race is Native American because every ethnicity has all shades of people from blk, white, and mixed with both blk and white. Nationality also not a race lol. So basically you are mixed ethnicities but still identifying as white.
@@SmithandWessonismyprotection, Native American is a race. This race is also known as indigenous, American Indian, American aboriginal, etc. Only people originating from Africa and some from Oceania and their descendants who bear physical similarities to these people are considered as black people.
@@SmithandWessonismyprotection, maybe you are Native American and black. You would be black if you have genetic information from native Africans or native Australians.
My wife is Asian and I am African American. Sometimes it is amazing how our on people put us down and bash us for not living a life how they perceive it should be. I say live for love and also a person that will work with you to become better no matter what the better aspect is
That's messed up. Comments like yours break my head. People are people. Live your life with those you love proudly friend. I'm getting sick of this trash. We have more evil to overcome until we live in peace.
Yeeah I understand. My lil brother has a Mexican American ex and is currently dating a white woman. He has a kid from both of them. My half sister's mixed with black and white. Like I'll defend them with the quickness.
I am a so called Black American and my husband is from Ghana West Africa, I love the culture and how his parents raised him and his four brothers. My father is so happy that I did because he loves the culture as well! Very family oriented, Christian, and the men are Alpha Males and gentle at the same time.
@@ARTDEVGRU247 Probably because we are ALL "Americans". Not distinguished by our color but our national affiliation. "Proud to Be"....By the way, ever hear of a Black Frenchman? A White Italian? A Black Irishman? Why do we have to discriminate based on color? This is discrimination.
It's all about like-mindedness. Period. Not skin color! Be equally yoked in the heart & mind and (hopefully) your relationship will stand the test of time.
Sounds like you’re talking bout me. I had the exact same outcome in my marriage and for damn near the exact reasonings. I am lucky and blessed that I married 2/3 levels up 😂. It has Not a damn thing to do with her beautiful white skin. She’s just a badass woman who gets her shit done. Best role model I could’ve ever prayed for our 2 daughters. Culture baby.
I'm a black man but I can say this that most of us men were attracted to feminine women White woman have been more approachable Just based off my experience and easy going to have conversations with
I married a black man in 1968. It made my life difficult, but you love who you love. I raised my children to not see color. To see people. I was raised by 2 racist white people. That drastically changed when the grandkids came along. It’s amazing what love can do.
This is weird but I love romance stories from back in the day. I’m fascinated by interracial or gay couples who got together in the 50s/60s or even before that. You figure if you are willing to be with someone who will make it so that your life is in danger just being with them, then you have to love them.
Why raise your kids to not see colour like seeing people’s colour is a bad thing. You shouldn’t have to ignore my race to treat me with respect. That is what is racist.
I married an Italian woman, we worked because we agreed on how to raise children, due to similar cultures and beliefs, we didn't make it but we are co-parenting amazing, something I'm not seeing among some of my other friends. I've always been an equal opportunity dater, Indian, Black, Asian, white. I like the way you approached this topic man, appreciate you!
I am a black man and I have always had a preference for black women to date. I have felt empathy with black women and I want my children to be a reflection of myself and a black woman. I want 100% black children or almost 100% black children.
I'm married to a Persian woman. The best decision I ever made. Without her I would not have had the success I've had. She built me up. She stuck by me when times got hard. Even through the thick was thick we made it. We been together twenty years. She's not materialistic or into fake lashes and fake nails. She knows that the more I'm built up we both are built up. We both have success. That's success
Wow poor Persian woman is really struggling being married to this dusty. Can't even get a $40 mani/pedicure. Hope she told her daughter to choose better.
Im white, 44 , divorced . I now date only black men, I really never was attracted to white men. And it’s a lot a personality thing not only the looks. Watching your video hoping I find my one and only 40+ man.
I went to the same high school as B Tatum in which was 75% black. He's spot on about being interjected into a different culture. I got a job at age 16 that was in a more white area and was around a different culture than what I was used to at school. It opened up my mind big time and white women were just kinder towards me, I ended up marrying white woman later on and love her to death.
"Stop looking at race and start looking at love." What an insightful meaningful statement! Thanks for the video and the heart felt comments. Your leadership is much appreciated.
And White Women are loving Big Black Men! 💕💕💕, why else are they being being liberals and who are the ones voting in SOOOO many Big Black Men to come inside, and replace the local men of Europe and Usa? Its love... and lust 💕
I date and could marry a white woman, a black woman, a brown woman or an Asian woman. It has nothing to do with skin color to me. It's who you vibe with and who makes you a better person.
@@shawnm2405 no, actually we are all the same race. The main difference is skin color and melanin. Obviously there are cultural differences but that is simply learned behavior. So no, not at all.
@@Beastlife50 doctors can tell your race just by looking at the bones. Your can't just get blood transfusions and transplants from just anyone either. So who are you trying to fool? Mixing is wrong and evil. There are consequences for violating natural law. Mixing is putting the nation on path to war.
The values thing very important. I am a black brit of Nigerian heritage and my husband is Togolaise. When we were dating we talked about kids and how we'd like to raise them. Also our family backgroud are very similiar, we both grew up in a two parent household and our parents had long marriages until both my father and father in law passed. I married in Togo and the meeting of the families was just beautiful. My husband is in charge of the finances because hes better at it and hes smart with money. I am the organiser of family trips and the household. When it comes to our daughter raise her together. Overall I am grateful that we can provide her with the security that our parents gave us. I agree marry for love and a value system that is for you regardless of colour.
I enjoyed your comment. Thank you Michelle.🙂...we split our duties too. He earns the bucks...and I spend them, because I'm better at it!😜...kiiiiidding. There has to be cooperation and partnership the way you describe. I'm good with the budgeting side so he calls me 'the banker', and I know he appreciates that about me. Greetings from NY.
Yes. People are afraid to allow someone to share the responsibilities or they feel weak. It’s great when two people come together and fill all the gaps with their strengths.
Im a white man in my early 30's ,and I married a black woman from Nigeria. We have been married over 3 years ,and we have a 10 month old daughter. She is my best friend ,and has made me a better Christian. One thing I was told a long time ago is that if you want to have a happy marriage in the long-term, your spouse needs to be your best friend.
Where are these black women who say "I Don't need a man?" WHERE are the ones who don't cook and clean and want to raise kids etc? And we're not ambitious? or loving or vulnerable? I don't know a single black women like the stereotype/generalizations he mentions. Sad that he has to criticize and talk down about black women in order to rationalize his choices. There are all types of black women in all different types of "cultures" and spaces. I guess its for likes and personal validation, but not necessary to disparage black women. This makes me So sad, such narrow opinions and helping to perpetuate sickening stereotypes. :(
I'm glad you said the word "culture". My Wife is Black, I am white and one of the many things my Queen has taught me is Black America has their own culture. Words have different meanings. Situations are handled differently. Social dynamics are different and if you don't understand this you will read situations incorrectly. Black Americans know this and are used to White culture because they've been in and around it their whole lives. Many of us White Americans have not experienced Black culture. If more of us knew this I believe a whole lot of our problems would go away.
I disagree with that. No one will fully understand other cultures, it's about acceptance and strength. The problems go away after personal growth and acceptance. Relying on external sources to "understand" another culture will be futile. Communication and personal growth will get you further.
Many whites do not understand Black culture because we were never invited to take part in it. I have found there are some words some Blacks use as a secret language and then accuse whites of not being open and accepting of them Again not all blacks but many. In my experience it’s 50/50 so what’s a white personal suppose to do😢 I just keep my guard up
As a black women i can agree with your opinion 🦋 I was taught not to need a man. I was taught in a household where my brothers was the men in the home. My out look on men was not to much. I was taught to be a strong black women. SMH at 37 I’m inner-standing and unteaching my self things to understand different cultures. Now open to date outside my race. Thanks for the insight 🦋
U should go read the willie lynch letters an u will see why some black women play mother an father in the household especially being we have the most men in prison in the United States
Hell yeah date who ever you are attracted too! Date some one that you have a lot of things in common with and hopefully this person will become your best friend!
In my personal experiences, I never chose a white woman. They always chose me. And accepted me. For me. I wanted things to work with black women and often times pursued them. But, they didn't accept me, and I wasn't bout to put on just for them to like me
@@StopListenThink Im white and my gf is Jamaican. I'm not really "into" black women, every other gf I've had has been white but we just got along really well and she laughed at my jokes lol.
My fiance is a white military woman US Army Officer and I get a lot of hate from Black women and White men. I asked my fiance why do you like black men she told me that she never thought that she would fall in love with a black guy until she met me .she told me that my skin color didn't matter because she saw my potential as a man when she realized I trained in martial arts like Karate and Muay Thai she fell in love with me because she seen my true nature and spirit 💯
You want a woman who is going to be nice to you." Those words are so simple yet profound. And its amazing how many women don't get that. Don't get that to their very core.
@Al S it's hard to be nice to someone else when you really don't like yourself. Most of these women have been raised in an environment where there's really no joy. And when and if they let their guard down to a man, they get dogged out. Vicious circle
Look at how relationships are portrayed in shows now. The men are belittled and emasculated and it’s seen as funny. Just like a lot of modern women brag about not cooking or cleaning or being intimate with their husbands. It’s “ cool” not to love your spouse and to complain about them. I don’t understand any of that. It sounds miserable.
It's hard to be nice to someone when they already have the perception you are angry all the time and won't give you a chance because of their poor generalisations
Well said Officer Tatum! I married my best friend and have a wonderful life. The moment I met her I knew it was going to be special. I'm a Caucasian and she is an American born Chinese.
Having been in law enforcement for the last 27 years, a white male and in February celebrating my 27th wedding anniversary to my black wife, man do I have stories.
I understand where he is coming from but I just don’t want to be stereotyped to not be agreeable or not have a good healthy upbringing. The only way to change this is to change the culture or behavior by showing love and help with healing not running away to other cultures or races.
Your not argumentative. He's just saying that because hes self hating and needs an excuse. Your beautiful date who u love don't listen to men who don't love themselves and need shape ups lookin raggedy insulting women regardless of their race. Most marriages between black men n ww fail. But he doesn't talk about that. Most marriages between wm an bw are statistically successful, but he doesn't talk about that. Bw are not the problem and soon the world will know that. It's cool to date outside but don't shade others like this guy. Weirdo behavior
That’s a sorry situation that you found yourself in but I am glad that you were patient enough to dig through the trash to find a pearl of a Woman. Don’t be mad at me. You nearly gave up hope thinking that a Black Woman existed worth marrying.
I’m a 50+ black woman. I respect your choice. You do you. However! If a woman has not experienced the love of a father or brother or uncle that is invested in her as a child or a teenager or a woman, then she will most likely not “need” a man. The culture that provides the support of their women and values their women will produce women who are courageous, generous, agreeable, smart, confident, etc. . That “culture” consists of the male and the female component. If neither “component” has the heart to stay and mend the culture then the perceived weakest link of that “culture” will continue to be devalued and left behind. My daughters are strong black women and very confident in who they are in Christ and although I may be seen as a role model for them I believe their father(my husband) invested in them, loves them and values them. The love of a FATHER makes a huge difference in the character of a woman. Let’s help the culture by encouraging the men to stand up and be fathers while love with the love of God. I’m happy you’re content but let’s help redefine the “culture”.
you are partially correct, we can also encourage the "women" to be flexible, agreeable, and most importantly, daughters of Christ. He isn't simply stating culture, he is laying it as the foundation to why people may choose certain scenarios after exposure. One scenario is marriage, and this has resonated with me. I have been married for 22 years and it's because of the agreeability, and synergy in Christ my wife and I have. My wife was encouraged to always do her part, not looking at the other components, and so it was for me. Redefinition of culture only comes from a redefining of the heart.
T MD, great comment! I want to add that “cultures” exist everywhere. Each family has a culture, each church, school, organization, etc. I don’t think the word “culture” should be used to define black people in the U.S. To do so is to ignore black people as individuals and instead to define a stereotype.
I think more people, esp women, need to hear this, because both son and daughter need to know what its like to have a stable family and/or a good father and/or male role model who is their father. However I do feel for the women who did not grow up with a stable family and/or a decent father who may have been abusive. I'm taking a risk myself you could say, but I'll have to see where it leads me ultimately.
Thank you so much for your candid response to this opinionated video. I literally could not have said it better. I usually watch this gentleman on a daily basis as a beautiful black woman that I am, but after dissecting this video, I will carry my interests elsewhere. I have no hate for any race true conservative and have been married to a black man over 28 years now and yes we have our problems and struggles but I appreciate the effort on his part to not run from responsibility as a black man and help raise responsible black sons who will be proud of their culture and the black queens that are out there.
I’m a white dude and my gf is black/Hispanic. We just clicked really well, she gets my humor and i can’t help but smile everytime I see her. I’m gunna marry that woman.
@@truthseekerredonly1987 haha yeah your probably right I mean we’ve been together 2 and a half years idk if it’s too soon to pop the question. Also I gotta get the ring first lol.
I’m a black woman who was first married to a white man. We had children together but culturally it was quite difficult to agree on raising children. I have been married to my black husband for 19 years. We also have a daughter together. My black husband helped raise my sons from my first marriage. We understand each other. We are also healing to each other. I adore him. Marriage is not easy, but we have each other’s back always. ❤
I think this is stupid .... what is the point of this?? You shouldn't have to explain why you like or want something. Unless you're doing it for the wrong reasons..
@@saltyclanker8440 hey it's all good, I found mine, and I know she has the right parts 👍. But Women...let me say that again Women, biological women is God's greatest creation 😍
I’ve dated all black women for years. It’s not even a big deal when I show interest in a black woman. They can tell I am interested in who they are and not a color
Thanks so much for making this video. I am a black woman I always wondered why black men marry white women. Don’t let anyone try to make you feel bad about who you married!
We are so afraid to date outside our race because of family not believing that it's OK. I've never been racist. My son in law is black. My man is black. I dated Mexican men and even married one. They were abusive mentally and physically. The man I fell in love with now has always been good to me. Never raised his hand to me. Total respect. We have similar interests and I've shown him what real love feels like. His Ex only cares about money. She was abusive verbally and physically. So we both came from similar situations. Brought us closer. Love who you love like you said. As long as you're happy and treated right don't pay any mind to family or friends opinions. They aren't the ones living your life.
Thank you so much for this post because I am a black woman who grew up in the military and most of my family members married outside of their race and had nothing to do with race it's just like you said it's culture is what we were used to what we knew what we felt comfortable with and a lot of my relatives are interracial children we've got to get past all this racial political nonsense because it's never about the color of your skin it's about your heart especially those of you who call yourself Christians wake up and the media who want to keep us strangled in this so-called segregated lifestyle and it's just not true so thank you so much for speaking the truth because I'm tired of hearing it too this is 2024 grow up people
One of the things that I always found odd ....being raised around the hood and in a area that's over 80 percent black is when black date white woman and say there's nothing wrong with it but as soon as someone who ain't black dates a black girl in they area they get mad and say it ain't right that always grinded my gears cause what's good for the goose is good for the gander..
I was married to a black Trinidadian in 1976. I am an European American. I encountered many of those same negative comments. So did my husband. People saw the obvious difference in our complexions but failed to see the similarities in our cultural and religious backgrounds. I married who I loved, not who I looked like.
Thanks for sharing. I find it interesting that a lot of white men on the thread are sharing their love for their black wives. So its weird to see this black police officer indirectly insinuating that as a generalized group, black women are somehow disagreeable. This is a red flag and a problem.
Religious and cultural backgrounds. So true for all kinds of relationships. I learned that I had a lot of common values with my Filipino and Mexican friends because we were Roman Catholic. Not just the religious practice but the values and moral part of out being.
I am Trini. 68 years. My son was married to an Afro American. The marriage didn't last, but there were 2 girls out of the union. One is 9, the other 7. Both were born in the US, but the latter has NEVER been to our homeland. My son goes to the US every 6 months to visit his daughters. The mother is bitter and insulting. What i would like to say is the only common thread Afro-Trinidadians and Afro-Americans have is that their ancestors came from Africa. They are like different races !
First of all in order to be a King or Queen one must have A Kingdom or Queendom to rule over and the last time that I checked neither Black Men and Black Women have the aformentioned.
And it’s fine to like a certain type of person. I’m white and was only attracted to white men. I’ve been married to the greatest man I know for 35 yrs.
I'm everything you say your wife is and im black, I have a father in my life, im a professional, i own my own house ppl just talk down on black women so much that ppl seem to believe all the bad stuff they hear, not all black women are ratchet.
I notice these days black women are starting to date out a lot more and more open to it, which is good keep your options open you’re more likely to find someone compatible
It's one thing if you like white women, but when you put it out there that "black men choose white women" as if they're the best thing ever it looks like you have no self respect and you find validation in knowing you have a white woman. He didn't even think about the young malleable black men who may see this and internalize it as truth, or more importantly the young black girls who see this and become even more self conscious about their looks. Black girls already have to deal with alot when it comes to desirability politics. When you see a black girl get angry when a black dude says "I like white girls" it's not because of "preference," it's because of ppl like this who perpetuate the idea of "black men prefer white women." And for the record I don't like it when black women do it either.
I get what you're saying, but honestly desirability politics about black women are still based on how the black woman's culture is perceived. An example is who Black women choose to date. I see Black women dating black guys who have nothing to offer. They are only dating these guys because they are black and dark skin. I see black couples out in public all the time, where the man is jobless, the woman is paying for everything, they are arguing about who the black man is cheating with, the man has multiple kids with multiple women he's not married to. Meanwhile, "I'm not worthy of a Black woman" because I'm lightskin and mixed raced. The only black women available to me are used up or have nothing to offer. So what am I supposed to do? Of course I date outside of my race at that point.
@@aweba25 You've never met my daughters. If you don't love God, you will get no attention! They don't want just a man of a certain color, they want a man who has morals and loves them with all his heart. Don't put yourself down, you were wonderfully and beautifully made. Don't let the wrongs of others create a root of bitterness in you. You do you.
@@PeerlessUtopian Individual character and confidence are stronger traits than subjective generalities that are birthed from bad experiences. Don't let the negative opinions of others get to you.
One of my teenage sons is dating a black girl rn. She’s very sweet and calm and lovely. It IS about culture, because not long ago, another one of my sons brought over a white girl, but she was acting….I don’t know how to say it. But she was loud, not well spoken, and was basically what we would call “ghetto” and we were like, “no.” It has nothing to do with race and everything to do with culture. We even live in the south, where everyone says the racist are, and I’m not gonna lie, they’re around. But mostly in the older generations.
Thank you for addressing this! When I was in college there was a white guy who was madly in love with a black girl. Sweetest Christian girl from a good, solid family. She lived across the hall from me in the dorms. Anyway, he wanted to propose to her, but his parents vehemently opposed the marriage. She ended up breaking up with him over it and has yet to get married 15 years later. He begrudgingly married a girl (white) that his parents chose for him, and it is a loveless marriage. It’s so sad. We’re all just different shades of brown. It’s terrible when people put melanin above emotional health.
@@soyELkuko Thats not what he said, Go and listen again. Just because we have issues doesn't mean someone cant call us out on them. The truth is the truth.
@@tonye.5410 what issues? And are those issues exclusive to one race or another? He has said he never had sushi until he went into the "white culture". He said that he never knew of the nuclear family until he saw it in the "white culture". He said he thought organic foods was defected until he was educated (following his line of thoughts from white culture). He said black nfl or NBA players marry white cause of culture. Use your head please. Does that mean that these young black players dont marry black women cause they are as Kayne West (Trump supporter) dang about GOLD DIGGER? And white women are not gold digger. Right, your absolutely right. White women can't be gold diggers. They cant cause it's in their culture. Use your mind. His statements of culture are all stereotypes.
Fam have a lifetime history with the Snow Bunny crisis. No beef with you, love your Snow Bunny. There's no way I can ever procreate with a snow bunny. My wife is Ghanaian, and I'm Liberian. We keep the tree growing in the original traditions. Thanks to my father, he plants the seeds that keep the tradition growing. Peace and love, however...
OMG PREACH!!! As a woman, very few times I have had this conversation with other people (about women being "old school" and serving your husband) and I haven't had any pushback. Most likely because of my heritage and background (1st gen Mexican and no father). It is seen nowadays by some that there is something really wrong if you wish you please and serve your husband. I believe this is because these people/women have not really ever felt what true love is. "Serving" does not mean being a slave. Men and women compliment each other. It is in our nature and I hope more people from the younger generation can experience this because it is something wonderful. I am truly blessed to have found the love of my life, who I have met for many many lives and keep running into each other. Love is eternal.
Amen. My husband and I both had horrible relationships in the past. Because of that we are a team, putting each other first. He is the head of our household, and we respect him as such. Decisions are made together, and compromise is abundant, so is personal growth. I enjoy all of Tatums content, for approaching subjects others will not! Love the reality perspective!!
@@kimkilpatrick2158 That’s my story as well. My wife and I are best friends and we love to serve each other. Neither of us take each other for granted and we show the upmost respect towards each other... We have this thing we say, where if things get a little tense, one of us will stop and say to the other “we are better than that”. I can’t tell you how often that stops myself, or my wife, dead in our tracks. It’s immediately followed by an apology by both of us.... I love making her happy, and I know she loves making me happy!!! There’s one thing I’ve learned over the years is that everyone wants to feel validated, respected, and loved.
I heard you say how BW don't know how to treat a man b/c their father wasn't there. Well by the same token BM never saw the dynamic of how a man is supposed to treat a woman either. In your previous video, you said you wanted to be part of the culture that values marriage and family. That is a culture that you admit is not prevalent in the black community. Since men are the gatekeepers of marriage -- then by your own observation BM do not value marriage and family as a collective. In light of this, BW who want better outcomes need to open up their dating options to other races of men. This 'black love' thing isn't working and is really a lie.
I think many Bw are doing just that!! Opening their options. I’m 21, I never thought this day would come. Bw are no longer stuck with crumbs, they are loving themselves and choosing better everyday☺️☺️
@@willardsandy2589 We’re dealing with and living amongst the most volatile and v10lent men in the US!! I’m not sure what more can be expected😂 This community is never going to produce princesses. Lol
@@willardsandy2589 can you blame them when they are surrounded by men that abandon them and are the most violent in the country? You think women can relax and feel safe with these type of men?
@@mememinaa7052 - All Officer Tatum did in this video is highlight the failures of B.Males. According to Officer Tatum safe and thriving communities don't exist in the B.C. because B.Males don't know how to create them. So they have to go run to the WM's community marry his daughter and nest away in what the WM has created. These B.Males are inadequate in their manhood and are simply seeking to rest in their femininity in the WM's patriarchy. That was what the whole Civil Rights Movement was all about. B.Males gaining access to Becky and nesting in the WM's society. They complain about R/WS but they knew it was racist beforehand. B.Males can't be taken seriously -- BW divest and allow B.Males to go over to Becky so that we can finally stop having their babies and birthing them into existence. They are doing us a great favor.
These comments are giving me life. Everybody here is so open hearted and not focused on the color of people and it's beautiful. The man I plan to spend the rest of my life with could be any color of the rainbow and I would still love him. He's the rock of our blended family. And a man of a man.
Putting color above the individual is Fascism, and that's not a conservative thing, thats a progr..communist thing, almost said progressive but that's just a pretty term for commie
ajh shes wants a black man . she just dont know how to talk with one
White women are generally prettier, generally better personality, and generally have more common interest. I’m Chinese and dating a Chinese woman for the first time in my life, and I’m probably going back to white women. Once you go white, it’s hard to go back.
@@mikeslemonade for u sir
@@mikeslemonade i'm a Conservative but i don't worship white skin. Good luck Michael.
I married a black woman,she worked as a nurse for Baylor Scott and White for 30 years. Great woman!!! And she's a christian woman,God gave me a great woman.
This is so cute 🥰
I married a black women As Well. Married 12 years with 4 kids
I was taught Martin Luther King Jr. in school, growing up. I was taught that someone's skin has zero to do with their personality. So I don't see people of another race as "they," or "them," I see them as "us." I've dated women that aren't my race and never thought anything of it. By today's standards I'm told that this method of thinking is racism.
@@jimbusmaximus4624 those kind of folks make me laugh.
You got a good one... most good black women are open to interracial dating. Not to mention white men also treat black women better than black men! I bet your wife is a natural black women! I’m a black woman who’s married to an Arab and he embraces my natural hair more than my ex black boyfriends! 😂
My step dad is black and he is the most beautiful soul I’ve ever met. I couldn’t imagine our lives without him.
One of the funniest people I've ever met was a black guy.
hes a sellout . he counldnt find a black women . who chooses white women over black queens . yall nigga be sick
with that thumbnail, he must be a good family man.
That you 'ever' meant even more than your own mother? Wow. I don't like when people say ever or the most that is coming on a little strong and to me almost trying people like God. All you had to say was a beautiful soul not the most I ever meant in the whole world lol The only one that is perfect and the most is Jesus
@@keitherickson9058 😂😂
I happened to be there when a coworker was challenged by another black man on why on earth he would marry a white woman. His answer touched my heart. He said he didnt just fall in love with his wife, he fell in love with her whole family. He grew up in the city, with an angry single mom. When he met his wife in college and they dated a few times she asked him to come home for a weekend with her family. He slept on their couch for 3 night's ( she had standards, was not a sleep around girl) and was right there innthe center of the home to see everything that went on. He said he loved the way her sisters respected their daddy. He loved the way her mama and daddy talked over decisions together. He loved the gentle teasing, the appreciation of each other, the sweet laughter. He loved the way her big brothers were proud of their wives and babies. This was the family life he never had, and he realized this was a woman he could create this kind of life with. Now they've been going strong for 30 years. Raised 3 beautiful girls. Been through all lifes ups and downs and they always have each other's back. Its a beautiful thing!
Cute story but I call bs. I have a great blk family and blk men with angry single moms always seemed to be jealous of my good family. I had one man try to divide my family because he was so jealous. We are just plagued with the yt is right and blk men are weaker than their women. They fell for the okie dokie and instead of conquering yt men, they are conquered. Therefore yt men are able to run the world and impose their views and ways of the world. So internally, you viewed that yt woman as better before you knew her family. You are probably being mistreated and don’t even know it. They probably have more sympathy for you than they like you. It does yt people good to help the poor little blk kid and your wife knows she will always have a social economical advantage over you. That’s what she wants. Yt women like blk men because they could be that lead in the house that she can’t get with yt men. Did you see Shaka Zulu? Look at the difference between you and Shaka. Shaka made the village bow down and respect his single mama and made her queen and punished anybody who ever devalued her including his own daddy. You and other blk men are conquered so you have to diss your mother whom womb you were made in, uplift the people who are on top because they’re ancestors defeated your ancestors, and bow down to the narrative, because you are conquered. You are not strong enough to build a village so you have to impose on another man’s village. Blk men like yt women because they are defeated, couldn’t uplift his own people so they have to impose on other Patriarchs. And in your case, matriarch because since you have a defeated culture, yt women will always be above you and the lead of your relationship and you have to be the submissive one because you let your culture fail. Did you ever stop to think that because our men let our culture get defeated; that’s why your mother is bitter.
Well said.
I love that- this exists in black families too. Just throwing that out there. ❤
"He grew up in the city, with an angry single mom." blaming black women for his taste in snow bunnies... His mother has nothing to do with the millions of other black women out there. LOL.
@@r.walker7986 Your racist comment only exemplifies why the man in the story chose the way that he did. You completely missed the point.
I am a Black Woman and my Man is Black and I am proud of it.
My wife is white and it had nothing to do with race when we got together. We've been together for 17 years now and I couldn't be happier
Exactly the same with my parents they never mentioned the skin color of one another just the fact they love eachother
Congrats 👏! Hope you have many more happy yrs together.
@@fondaholland1595 thank you!
@@chrispowers627 it's a beautiful thing when different cultures & ethnic groups mix, my family is very diverse, I'm white Latino but my daughters mom is black, wish u the best friend
@@HOODKINGSofficial same to you!
Absolutely! Marry a person that has your Values and morals. You will never change anyone in their core
Amen. 👍
For me, as a black man, I just want a Christian woman of any race that God has for me.
Stay prayerful folks🙏🏾
Just settle for something inflatable
Keep praying Sean God will give u 1.
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Amen to that! Good luck with your search! She’s out there looking for you two. Never loose the faith! She will be worth the wait.
Pray for her so when you find her, YOU can tell her you’ve been praying for her happiness, her peace’s, her success, until she found you!
God Bless!
@@kdkay4039 Amen KD!!!
Actually there are many attractive, intelligent, well-spoken, good natured black women I have known.
You racist. Well spoken. You definitely a racist
Rare 😮
@markeyosef1579 but he's supposed to be...what's your excuse?
I am married to a black woman and to be honest, most of the time I forget we are even a different race because she is my best friend. Often times people enter relationships for reasons not predicated on race or fetish, but because they actually love that person. Shocking isn't it? Imagine that...you can actually be with someone and love them regardless of their skin color. Who knew? 🙄
I just loved reading this!
No such thing as race….all are humans
Some have different genetics that determine different attributes
So at most you could say there are different species of Homo sapiens
@@galatrax1181 Well, I would agree and state that race is essentially a social contruct and does not exist in the way that we have been indoctrinated to believe. Mind you, non-African people do possess a marginal amount of Neanderthal DNA that Africans do not, but that does not indicate that we are separate species by any stretch of the imagination.
@@travisreifke4356 in regards to neanderthal DNA, that contradicts your point about "race is a social construct'. Different races evolved in vastly different climates, and so certain Genes either evolved through mutation or become more strongly expressed through natural selection. Culture is a social construct, absolutely.
I think the backlash against "race" is due to the outdated belief from pre 1930s that blood and breeding, 'race' etc. Determined your place in society instead of ability and merit. The Eugenics movent in America and Europe culminated horribly in Nazi Germany.
The answer to that really terrible shit is to give everyone an equal opportunity to succeed on their own merits and reward success, something that the Far Left of today wants to replace with a new and insidious form of separation via "race".
@@NoneMcNobody It's not a contradiction at all. I stated that it is a MARGINAL difference in DNA. So...race is indeed a social construct. What I mean by that is that homosapians are essentially all the same genetically. Our differences are trivial at best and do not separate us in profound ways like race purists and extremists like to mythologically claim.
I'm a Black housewife who grew up conservative and I'm married to a White man. He's my best friend and the love of my life.
I’m pretty sure there is something wrong with him for choosing a black women.
Nothing better than a best friend who's your husband!! I'm happy for you both!! 🥰 I'd Ignore ignorance, it's the best medicine.
@@Onepieceistheworstanime why?
❤😇 love in a successful marriage...bless your hearts! Eff the naysayers!
@@Onepieceistheworstanime There's something wrong with you for saying that. ;(
It’s very simple. They marry who they marry because they’re attracted to them physically and emotionally. People who aren’t racist don’t look for a spouse based on race.
Most if women that look liked me emwere rude to me and would not give me the time of day especially in college I don't like attuides
Are you sure about that ? LOL
I agree, find someone who makes you happy.
@@malikwilson7387
Sometimes it’s beast to look inward and try to elevate yourself to be the best you can be
@@malikwilson7387 let me guess you was chasing the women who didn’t want you instead of the ones who was probably into you
I’m a black man from the hood who grew up around black women so I dated black women all of my life but in high school I got in some trouble and went to live with my uncle who lived in the suburbs and I met a white girl and in the beginning I was just planning my on having sex with her because I never been with a white woman at that point so I was like why not let me give it a try . I thought it would be boring and that we’d have nothing in common but it turns out I got more in common with her than I have with any woman I ever been with up to that point.I want people to realize that everybody got the same issues growing up just in different settings so don’t be afraid to date outside your race you might meet your soul mate .
If you’re are regular “average” black man you’re more like to relate to them than black woman. Average regular normal life style is like bug repellent to a roach. They do not like average for whatever reason but that right up white womans alley
So she saved you you know we have already heard this 2000 million times not very new . What did you want a cookie. Black love isn't put on a shelf and then presto you found a Barbie doll. I will say this you didn't waste anytime securing her in your new found environment.
Dating a white woman is more fun and less stressful.
Facts I tell black men all the time don’t be afraid to date out & try new things
Choose a person on values and morals - not skin color.
Agreed.
Thanks. Doctor.
Only those with no values or morals would betray their family and culture. You and this video are both disgusting.
yeah really...such lovely words.Now and go and live in a majority black enviroment.You will soon have a new found respect and love for the people you were born into.
WRONG!! CHOOSE A PERSON ON VALUES AND MORALS OF YOU'RE OWN RACE!!!
I am a black man who married a white woman and he is 100% right!! Its about your environment and culture NOT RACE!!!
This might sound a bit brutal but (real) black women arent very attractive at all...remember Tiger Woods and all those WHITE women he had affairs with were all whiter than white with nearly all of them from the likes of Sweden and Austria etc etc but Tiger Woods wasnt a true black man because his Mum was Taiwanese i think
You can't stop the power of attraction.
As a South East Asian guy who grew up in a diversified city in California; I often tell many people to date for the ideals rather than the looks or skin color. My first serious relationship along with engagement was with a white girl I met at church. She took care of me better than all the other Asian and Hispanic girls that I tried dating. Sometimes God throws curve ball at us and we ended up being happy from situations we could never guess. After a painful long 10 years of dating around with girls of all colors; I ended up marrying a Asian girl who was the least type of race of girl that I suspect I would ever marry since many previous Asian girls I dated were bullshiating around a lot. Sometimes you just never give up and keep on dating until you find out which girl is for you. I had to go through about 7-10 ex white girlfriends, 3-4 Asian exs, and 2-3 Hispanic ex to finally find out that another Asian girl in the future would end up being my wife. The sad thing was that most of the white girls who I dated accepted who I am and respected me more than all the Asian and Hispanic girls that I tried to date. I find out that it was my spiritual faith and tenacious attitude in not being a wimp that proved that I wasn't some chump in the street. Reason why the Asian and Hispanic girls I dated was such a low count was that those numbers were from a much larger group of girls that didn't cut out to be decent. Some would say why I didn't date black girls; it was that the black population in my city was extremely low and I had no access to trying to date black girls. I did met a few Black Puerto Rican and Dominican Republican black girls who did catch my eye; but I can never get them to click it with me so that's why I had no black ex-gfs. Either way; best of luck to all those who are still trying to date around! Life is tough so never give up and find that person who follows your philosophy rather than your looks!
You do not need anyone! period unless you are weak individual that cannot comprehend the obvious
So it's not the terrible attitudes and the droopy utters?
My uncle married a much younger black woman. They've been married for 21 years, 2 children. We thought he'd never get married and we were so ecstatic that he found a loving wife. Her family finally excepted their marriage after much pushback and opposition. I asked her why she chose a white man to marry and she said "I chose your uncle because I love him n we are best friends and because I wanted a husband a father to my children that would be there for us." Beautiful family 21 years later. ❤😇
Just to be clear her statement doesn't come with any backhand response towards black men not taken care of their kids correct?
@@TheUzamaki1234 you'd have to ask her. What I took from it was that she had experiences of her own within her family and culture to know what it was she wanted in a husband and what she didn't want. She made her choice based upon that and has been a happily married woman ever since. Her family were the only one's in opposition to the marriage. Cultural differences, not racial. You'll see it from whichever angle you choose.
JOKES ON YOU
SHE DIDNT MARRY A WHITE MAN SHE CHOSE SOMEONE SHE CONNECTED WITH WHO HAPPENS TO BE WHITE YOUR UNCLE
@@TheUzamaki1234 lol
@@TheMandyhuppert ok now u can say the n word u have a black family member
I grew up in a all white neighborhood and still married a black man
It makes sense that you wanted the opposite of what was around you growing up
Blacks with blacks white people with white people
I'm also a Black woman who grew up in the suburbs and I prefer Black men. I'm still waiting for him to find me lol.
@@TheDanster4 girl you gotta be a Naomi and Ruth
Over 20 years ago I worked in a nursing home in Idaho. There was a white woman who’s black husband came in every day to feed her all her meals. I can’t imagine what they went through in their time. I would have loved to known their love story.
They probably didn't go through much. Maybe a few sneers and leery-eyed looks here and there, but most people aren't as prejudiced as the Iibtards would have you believe.
@@kropking Depends on the generation to be fair. OP probably refering to an older couple. Sneers and looks can build up over time and affect a person. But you're right about nowadays. Few people are racist and if you are you're really viewed as a freak these days.
Just imagine that kind of love he had for her.
My mother always told my sister and me, it's not about his race, it's about whether he's a true God fearing Christian man and, how he treats you.
Love is love regardless of race.
I’m Mexican and married a black women! She’s amazing!
does she make peach cobbler alot
@@lucasblake449 😂
Can she make you tacos,burritos
Wow!!! Nice!
@@lucasblake449 can yours?
I’m a Black woman and my husband is Kurdish. We have a good relationship and we’re building a home together. I dated black men, white men, Arabic and it was my husband that won my heart. Why? He genuinely likes my heart. My looks and body are a plus for him. I feel the same. His heart is what makes him a real catch. Thank you God ❤🎉
Lol
But ur clapped. So it must have been ur brain and petsonality. Gg
@@texasplaya191who she fooling 😂
I'm a Black married 11.5 years to a wonderful White man. I come from a 2 parent home. My Mom was a homemaker. My parents taught us the importance of God, love, family, and home. My Honey 🍯 is very country, and I love his personality, jokes, and the way he speaks.🥰 It is extremely important to me our home is drama free, but filled with warmth, joy, and love.
That's beautiful... Congratulations!
Good for you. You can't go wrong with a strong country man. He will love you to the end of days and be the man you always dreamed of. God Bless and enjoy life's blessings, because God is Color Blind.
Did you there feel was a disconnect in your marriage because of the race difference? For example, I'm not black, but my dad is and I'm dating a white woman. I remember a white woman who was friends with hersaid the n word in a casual way and I didn't think I heard her right so I brought it up to my girlfriend and we had a huge argument about it and it wasnt really resolved until I brought it up to my sister much later. When I talk with her dad about politics I feel like I'm defending my existence and she'll stand right next to me and never backs me up on this
Drama free - priceless!!! Blessings to y'all!
God Bless you and your family!! That's Beautiful! 🌹
I don’t discriminate, I love all women!
😆😅🤣👍
Even the ugly ones?
@@A-Dubs398 Yes. Except AOC, Kamala, Liz Warren, Lori Lightfoot, Maxime Waters, Ilhan Omar and Ayanna Presley. And Lizzo.
@@MrRMT1986 🤢🤮🤮You had to say their names..
@@mellojellofello SAY THEIR NAMES! Lol
I married a white man and sometimes I forget he’s white. But I always remember he’s a great guy!
Honey u don't forget it's just not on your mind and why would it but stop with the lies mama
@@mol9133 I’m def not lying. It’s been ten years he’s not a white guy, he’s just my husband. You wouldn’t understand.
I ain't fixing to date noooo white man.... Can't do it. 💯😁
That’s good! Colorblind is healthy. May you have many many years of happiness!
Thats real
I have been very blessed to be raised in a family that did not discriminate. I have many relatives who are married interracially black, Asian, etc. My mom is Native American and my dad is German. So we are definitely a melting pot of love regardless of race.
Y'all wanna be native American so bad. Stop lying...
@@reliza93 I am half Native American and half German.
@@reliza93no we dont. We are glad by who whe are. White, black, asian we are all humans
@@reliza93 THEY DENY US OUR NATIVE BLOOD, AND CLAIM IT ALL FOR THEMSELVES TO JUSTIFY THEIR RAPING OF AMERICA
As a black woman in a mixed marriage for 17 yrs. I think culture is the #1 thing for us black people that married outside of our race. I agree with you.
Congrats You're one of the 26% of black women who be married in their lifetime. And you're part of that 3.5% of all black women in an interracial marriage. You're the unicorn.
-Kevin Samuels
Did you know the most successful marriages are black women with white men??? Who would have figured??
@@TheUzamaki1234 and why is that
@@davelewis9795 True.
Darn it you shattered my dreams, I love Dr. Ben Carson he is so handsome and smart & my vote for whatever office he chooses to run for. Thanks for sharing some of your personal life❤
I love your perspective. I’m married to a Hispanic man. He is the first relationship I had outside of black men. I always had an attraction to all races but particularly black men because I grew up in an area where there were mostly black men. Then I fell in love with a Hispanic man and married him. Period. Nothing else behind it. I remember a black young man being celebrated because of his college grades or something of the sort and I clapped and one of my friends turned around and made a comment like “you’re married to a Mexican” as if I didn’t appreciate or could not appreciate a black man being successful because I am not married to one. I think that people assume that when you marry out of your own race that you don’t like your race. Not true. I was raised to love who you love no matter their color. Great content Tatum.
@Mia Omiah I would say that it was mostly a bad experience. I do not think it had anything to do with them being black men because I married at 21 so all of my experience dating black men were in high school. At that time they were still very young men and not looking for anything serious it seems. Also I will have to add that although my husband is Hispanic he grew up in foster care for most of his life and he was raised by an African American man so the way he treats me isn’t influenced by hispanic culture. I always said I would marry a black man and have a chocolate baby lol funny how life ends up.
@Mia Omiah thank you.
I don't understand why so many Black Americans think it's being a traitor to marry an opposite color race. When I was young, in the 70's and 80's a lot of interracial marriages occurred. Now I'm hearing things that are going backwards on this subject. Who has been teaching the Black population to stay segregated? That's truly a cynical way of thinking, and totally racist.
@Like Magic While that may have been true before the Civil Rights Bill, it certainly hasn't been after that legislation. What difference does it make what color you are? It's only melanin. The inside of everyone's palm is the same color. Go figure.
Hindi people are Black too. Lot's of different races are Black, White, Brown, Red, Yellow.
@@ulsterbenny495 Oh wow. Yes that is crazy.
As a black woman married to a white man for 39 years. It’s who you love!
Wow, OMG! That is a long time!
❤️
🛌 🔧
My husband is black. His first wife was black. He never talked bad about her. He said they just grew apart. They were like roommates in the same house. He said he wanted to make the marriage work, so he tried to take steps to get things together. But, they just didn’t. So, he moved out, and they mutually decided to divorce. He was with her 17 years. He adopted her daughter as his own. His daughter was grown by this time. He owned his own home, and his ex owns her own. She never had a problem until he got together with me. Then, she was calling him almost every day. She started showing up at our church. She would sneer at me. She would take jabs at me when she spoke with him on the phone, and he would always have their conversations on speaker. (I didn’t ask him to, but he said it was out of respect for me.) She absolutely couldn’t stand that he’d married a white woman. She said it was because he could control me…and he loved control she said. His daughter tried to break us up. When she couldn’t, she stopped speaking to him. He always spoke respectfully to his ex regardless of how she spoke to him; but, he wouldn’t allow her to disrespect me. He would say, “She’s my wife now. I need you to not disrespect her.” She would then rant and sneer, “YOUR WIFE. YOUR WIFE. WELL, WE CAN’T HAVE ANYONE DISRESPECTING YOUR WIFE.” She would want to speak with him in private at church, until he said, “Anything you have to say, you will have to say it in front of my wife.” She didn’t ask to speak with him in private or at all anymore. Last year, his daughter died unexpectedly. He still grieves over their lost relationship because he’d raised her since she was seven. He only found out when his ex called him after she’d been buried. She asked him once what kind of message does it send the grandkids that he married a white woman. He said, it sends the message that you marry who you love.
OMG!! she only told him AFTER she buried the daughter!!! shows you the type of person she is!! OMG, I can believe that.
I’m so sorry you went through that. This breaks my heart. I pray for your continued happiness and blessings over your marriage❤
Alot of bw are jealous of white women and really want to be you dont trust them ever beautiful
That sucks. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I'm a young 29-year-old Black male. I've dated Black women over the years and I'm looking more toward dating out to other races of women. I've experienced being more on the same page with other races of women because I have a conservative mindset and most Black women are heavily liberal minded. It's unfortunate but I'm tired of having the same dead-end results of not moving on with life and not getting married and starting a family with a woman I can trust. Color at this point is of no importance as long as they have similar values that I have.
ASK GOD to bring you the right one. I did and now happily married almost 50 yrs! God knows you better than u know yourself and He KNOWS the right person for you and how to bring her to you. Go for it! worked for me! @@DemetriT1
I feel like race doesn’t matter in dating. You love who you love. For whatever reason… doesn’t need to be justified.
it does to me and other people. attracted only towards one or a few races.
@@evalios8137 That's your choice...
Totally agree! I've dated black men, Hispanic men, white men, and it just didn't matter - the best one stuck around and he is who he is. It isn't about what he looks like, it's who he is on the inside. He's a man willing to lovingly raise another man's child and he works hard to provide for all of us. He's a damn good man, no matter what he looks like on the outside.
@@NYShepherdGirl it is. people automatically discriminate without even thinking about it.
@Lucky Sportt their attitude ?
There’s a difference between getting married and keeping a marriage. A lot of woman thinks about getting married but forget to focus on how to keep a marriage alive and it’s a lot of work.
Amen to that Will.
To be fair, that works both ways. I've seen a lot marriages fail cause the guy stopped doing what it took to get that women also..
@@deliriouswhome1 Did that guy failed? Or did the guy gave up trying? That’s another situation even tho it goes both way’s there’s still the lack of accountability. A lot of time people hate being hold accountable for their actions. From my experience my ex couldn’t never hold herself accountable without dragging me along with her to the point that I just gave up trying because I already know how it will end.
@M W ummmmm, that seems like an opinion not a fact. Porn does have an affect on people but don’t know if is the cause on why marriages gets ruined. And no, what went wrong in my relationship is that I got tired of her dragging me down with her when I tell her what she done.
@@will1905 your right people do tend to not want to hold themselves accountable sometimes, that includes yourself. I don't really see the value of being in relationship and once that relationship end pointing fingers.
It doesn't honestly matter why the relationship didn't work out, the fact is it just didn't. There always something an individual can learn to do better going into Thier next relationship.
My boyfriend is white and honestly, we didn’t get in a relationship because of color. I agree with you 100%, because we both are like minded.
My boyfriend and I met on tinder and just immediately hit it off so dang well. The difference in our skin colors isn’t a factor in our relationship. We care about each other’s hearts, we are there for each other in important ways. This man is my heart’s treasure ❤
It’s about character and culture. I’m a black woman and I’ve never thought badly of black men who date out. It’s strange to me that some members of the black community get upset about interracial dating. You love who you love. 💯❤️ I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with having a preference or “fetish.” Attraction is important. Anyone who says otherwise is delusional.
It's strange that some members of ANY community get upset about interracial dating. But then again it's just racist.
I agree... But I don't think that skin color preference is preference is technically a So called fetish.. But I will agree to a certain facial structures Or textures of the body can definitely be linked Rasa itself.. For instance if someone likes a person with freckles then generally most of the time of that person is black they're gonna end up dating someone who is white or biracial cause very few black people are born with freckles..
I do not think any sociologist could explain things any better.
💯💯
I also don't know what's wrong with "fetish"
the word has a bad reputation after all those movies about serial k1llers.
but ask any man and he will tell you what his "fetish" is - for example, long hair, big whatever, small whatever.
I think it's the same for women - some have 'fetishes' for specific height, voice, complexion, etc.
Only transhumanist genderless robots could have problems understanding these basic human things.
I'm Mexican and my wife is white (Irish/ Italian). Honestly, i didn't look "within my own race" for a partner because it's in the Latin culture to want to fight constantly. I tried that kind of relationship and it killed me Inside. My wife is perfect. I am by no means a flawless individual, but we both work off each other and we make each other better. She works, I'm a stay at home dad (work injury) and we make it work.
Good for you man!!👏 Wish you guys the best!
To want to fight? Never saw our culture like that. Us Latinas are just feisty. Handle it or don’t, you didn’t. You just found your one outside of our culture. Nothing to do with “fighting”. Most Latino families are muy cariñosos. Sorry yours fought.
Bro, respect to you and your lovely wife. You didn't want to fight constantly and you married an Irish Girl?!?! Us Scotts and Irish are like the Snow Giant Latinos of the north with fire for hair and much shittier food and weather.
Italians; two words....Roman Empire! They're OG Latinos!
Notre Dames called "The Fighting Irish" for a reason dude. I do applaud your tastes as I also married an Irish/Italian girl. :-)
@@barbaraa.6190 Latinos r feisty so ye we do have more arguments. Every family get together is so angry. Everytime I party with whit friends families, they never fight
Are you a white mexican? If yes you did marry within your race by marrying an Irish/Italian. Mexican is not a race it's an ethnicity.
Thank you so much for this Brandon. As a black person, I do not judge people based on their race, I only judge people based on their personality.
Amen
Which is derived from their culture.
😇 awesome!
Are you Martin Luther King? :)
@@JonathanGillies No I'm not unfortunately and I'm pretty sure that's what every person would say and if he was here today, all these woke people would get cancelled.
Oh Boy, here we go. Well all I will say is too each his/her own. And if you like white women, then have it. For me, it will always be "Black Women" and nothing but Black Women. I have been with my beautiful "Black" wife for 32 yrs, married for 24 of them. And it just doesn't get any better. And as far as "Culture" as you say, we have a lot in common. And yes we both grew up with "2" parents. And my father was a good black man and though he died young, he was definitely a good husband to my mother, a good provider. And a great father to his 4 children. You don't need to have a white girl to find that. But like you said, it's all about love. And for me, "I Love My People".
Some of the issues black men don’t want to speak about in reference to dating white women. It is easier to put the majority of the issues on black women. But never self-hatred or the many other things that black men that are human beings carry.
As a Black woman, I want to know. Why does it even matter who someone chooses to marry?! It bothers me that it's still a discussion today Marriage is about a partnership also and he found his partner. Please let's just focus on that fact that we are called to love and the color shouldn't matter.
Stop telling men what we should focus on. That's the first problem.
" *Why does it even matter who someone chooses to marry?* "
Our lives are ours, we dont owe an explanation to anyone (aside from maybe a loving relative that wants to make sure we're picking someone good for ourselves), especially strangers, as to why we've chosen the people in our lives for ourselves. Doubly so if their questioning is based solely on skin color.
A partnership is for business only your referring to a relationship not partnership.
@@TheUzamaki1234 my comment was not directed toward men only. We all need to focus on being kind and loving and thats according to the Word. As far as a partner, it's your choice who you love but don't make the choice based on others opinions. Have a great night!
You know the answer. As long as there is a political party that is constantly injecting race into EVERY aspect of everyday life there will always be racial tension.
What party benefits from the racial tension? Which party beats that drum even when there is absolutely no racial reason to do so?
If the only thing you have in common with your significant other is race, then you're probably in the wrong relationship. In my opinion, race shouldn't be the single most important criteria for choosing a mate. I think it's ok to have a preference...whether someone is your race or not; but ultimately, the one you choose should share your values.
100% agree Ofc Tatum...as a black man. I grew up in a diverse community, attended majority white schools, dated my fair share of black women, and ended up marrying a white woman. Culture plays a role, but like anything, you love what or who you love.
I think black ppl hate on blacks that are in interracial relationships/marriages bc they were told to marry a "strong black woman/man", and that white ppl already have it all, that we need to stick together. It's instilled in some black families to not stray from their race and that is the mindset that goes back decades that unfortunately still exist today. But like Ofc Tatum said, love should be the reason with all the other characteristics of why you marry whomever.
You sold out!
You love who you love. Simple as that.
@@RealmCenter40 I mostly witness what you're referring to in social media platforms. That's where bigots have the courage to spew their foolishness. Other than that, I know it exist in the real world, but not nearly the rate the media wants citizens to believe.
@@RealmCenter40 The left are more against interracial dating then anybody else. Because they're the ones who promotes crt, which also mocks people in interracial relationships.
@@hellomikie92 The left are the culprits dating back to slavery. They owned more slaves than anyone. Most ppl don't even know that, but yes they hate interracial couples, that's why it's funny Kamala snuck in as Vice P.
I like that, "Marry who you love. Not who you look like." That's a good one.
My aunt married a black American man. He's been a God send to our family. I've learned all my carpentry skills from him. Our family sees no color. Only the character of the man!
now go and live in a majority black community,and let me know how wonderful it all is,if you survive more than 6 months.
@@orangefacedbuddah1776 I've lived in Cincinnati for 47 years. And your racist point is?
@@saltysergeant1620 Why is he racist when he just stated a fact?!
@Bleu Barclay Educate yourself and maybe you understand the point he was making!
@Bleu Barclay you just proved 2 points about yourself... 1st you're the true rassist in this comment section. 2nd You're not the sharpest tool in the shed!!!
This is 💯 spot on. The race thing was always so odd to me. Race was not even a discussion in our house. I had posters of crushes of every color on my wall as a kid. When my grandmother spoke about people, which was rare, it was always in terms of behavior and character, never race.
Are you absolutely blind ? Tatum spent the entire video glorifying the so called white culture as doing better. Saying they are more likely to have a father and mother. Statistically that is inaccurate even if you believe it to be true no one can address why
Same for me!
@@mikem4481 Oh, for Pete's sake, Mike. You are reading your own energies into her comment! Kids have "favorites" while they are growing, exploring and shaping their own individuality. Maybe if YOU put a poster on your wall, YOU might be "lusting" (I don't know), but kids are not going to feel the same as a grown man. All you do is reveal yourself in your comment and "scold" others because you are condemning yourself. And because of self-absorption, you totally miss her fine point that she was fortunate to be raised in a family where she was not burdened with judging people for their race. You would enjoy life more if you lifted your awareness more heavenward rather than downward.
It’s not about the color of skin. It’s about attraction, love has no boundaries. We Fall in love with another person for reasons outside of skin color. Politicians make this an issue. Officer Tatum is spot on again. Thank you for bringing this issue to light.
Well said! 👍
I had a black boyfriend for a while. I didn't care that he was black, but slowly he revealed that it bothered him that I was white. He was charming in the beginning, but his true feelings came out. He complained that I dressed white, listened to white music, ate white food, had white hobbies, etc. I never thought about those things before. I was just being myself. He was always talking about how people reacted or didn't react to us as a mixed couple. I never noticed those things either. Suddenly my whole world was about everything being "black" or "white". When we went to black areas or to his family's house, they treated me with disdain. My family didn't treat him like that. It was like he woke up every day and said, "OMG, I'm black, and it's all Whitey's fault". He left me for another white woman, and she was blond. With all of his hatred of whites, I guess I was not white enough for him. I moved on and found a man like myself, and it was nice to talk about things besides "black" and "white". Things like "let's go for a hike". I know not all black men are like this, but I could never understand if he despised whites so much, then why would he choose them for girlfriends and then treat them badly?
I’m so sorry that this happened to you. I’m a black girl and my black brother told me that he’s would never date a white woman because of their music, flat asses, sensitive skin and their boring jokes and personality. I asked him why he would say such a thing and his black girlfriends make boring jokes too!! He kept quiet about it. I think you should maybe find someone that matches your personality. ❤❤❤
As a black male, I found it easier to fall in love with a girl who simply understood who I was. It sounds crazy but growing up, I was never perceived as “black enough” by white and black women as well as other races because I was “too kind” & “too compassionate.” That man you dated probably didn’t like you because you didn’t fit his standard of a white woman. He probably wanted a white girl who loved everything he did. I’m not saying it was right how he treated you at all but love is a dangerous game.
But I will clarify that in my personal opinion? There is nothing wrong with having a racial preference in love. I’ll never treat a girl wrong or another race from me but I do lean towards lightskins or white girls.
he kinda missed the whole point of dating someone from a different race or cultural background. The point is to merge or integrate. I'm thinking of dating a white girl too
I dealt with the same thing, and the funny thing is is that he acted more white than I did and I acted more black being the white woman! I realized after dating black men that they were the prejudice ones full of hate! again, I don’t understand why they would date white women if they hate white people so much it doesn’t make sense! And that’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard that we supposedly don’t have personalities. I find the complete opposite. I have a huge personality and I have a big butt. We don’t all have flat asses! that’s literally the reason why black guys are hitting on me is just because I happen to have a booty! Which is ridiculous. I’m more than my body and want to be valued! I’m now dating a Puerto Rican man and I’ve never been so happy. He treats me the best.
He just sounds confused and ignorant. I'm black and I've dated women who were black, white, asian, latin, german, middle eastern, etc. It's a freedom to experience your life without worrying about what other ppl think or say. I think it's crazy when I hear some of my ppl say 🗣️"a black man wants to date a white women to act white" or "he dates outside his race because he hates black women". 😑 How in the hell is that possible when my mom (🙏🏾🕊️💓) was a black woman who I dearly loved and she loved me, and my aunts, cousins, and grandmothers were also black women? 😑 That's the dumbest 💩 I've ever heard in my life and unfortunately some black folks constantly reiterate that, and sadly it's usually black women. It's especially ignorant considering that although I have friends of different races, most of my childhood friends or friends I've made later on in life are predominantly black. Being a black man in this world can be challenging but from my own experience it also brings a certain element of charm and mystery when it comes to dating. I've been approached and have approached women from different countries that were beautiful, gentle, and not materialistic. I don't know if me being black had anything to do with that but I like to think it's part of the reason as well as my personality.
I definitely agree on this one. I didn't choose my husband because he's white, I chose him because we have the same values, similar sense of humor, and he's very supportive.
as a Libertarian I'm kinda thinking a black republican female out there would be a good fit for me. Not sure how to find em lol!
Recipe for a long, strong, healthy relationship 🥰
100%
@@ShifuCareaga we are out there lol . I am one and know others as well. But I agree that it might be difficult to find especially when we may not voice our political beliefs right away.
@@ThePeacefulbutterfly ikr!?
Any recommendations?
I married a Korean and I’m half white / Native American. He’s my best friend and the love of my life. We balance each other out and understand each other. We just clicked and didn’t look at who we are on the outside , but who we are in the inside. We love each other ❤️
Surely u found him attractive enough... looks never hurt...
What race is Native American because every ethnicity has all shades of people from blk, white, and mixed with both blk and white. Nationality also not a race lol. So basically you are mixed ethnicities but still identifying as white.
@@SmithandWessonismyprotection, Native American is a race.
This race is also known as indigenous, American Indian, American aboriginal, etc.
Only people originating from Africa and some from Oceania and their descendants who bear physical similarities to these people are considered as black people.
@@ismarjovannypalaciosmena.1701 No, it's not I'm Native lol and I'm blk
@@SmithandWessonismyprotection, maybe you are Native American and black.
You would be black if you have genetic information from native Africans or native Australians.
My wife is Asian and I am African American. Sometimes it is amazing how our on people put us down and bash us for not living a life how they perceive it should be. I say live for love and also a person that will work with you to become better no matter what the better aspect is
That's messed up. Comments like yours break my head. People are people. Live your life with those you love proudly friend. I'm getting sick of this trash. We have more evil to overcome until we live in peace.
Yeeah I understand. My lil brother has a Mexican American ex and is currently dating a white woman. He has a kid from both of them. My half sister's mixed with black and white. Like I'll defend them with the quickness.
I am a so called Black American and my husband is from Ghana West Africa, I love the culture and how his parents raised him and his four brothers. My father is so happy that I did because he loves the culture as well! Very family oriented, Christian, and the men are Alpha Males and gentle at the same time.
Why did you say "so called" ?😂
@@ARTDEVGRU247 Probably because we are ALL "Americans". Not distinguished by our color but our national affiliation. "Proud to Be"....By the way, ever hear of a Black Frenchman? A White Italian? A Black Irishman? Why do we have to discriminate based on color? This is discrimination.
I love this!! I was raised by a single mother who did NOT raise me to be racist and I agree. Love is love regardless of race or color!
AMEN...and I as well
Same
👍
It's all about like-mindedness. Period. Not skin color! Be equally yoked in the heart & mind and (hopefully) your relationship will stand the test of time.
Exactly
Short and sweet, thank you.
Sounds like you’re talking bout me. I had the exact same outcome in my marriage and for damn near the exact reasonings. I am lucky and blessed that I married 2/3 levels up 😂. It has Not a damn thing to do with her beautiful white skin. She’s just a badass woman who gets her shit done. Best role model I could’ve ever prayed for our 2 daughters. Culture baby.
I'm a black man but I can say this that most of us men were attracted to feminine women White woman have been more approachable Just based off my experience and easy going to have conversations with
I married a black man in 1968. It made my life difficult, but you love who you love. I raised my children to not see color. To see people. I was raised by 2 racist white people. That drastically changed when the grandkids came along. It’s amazing what love can do.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that 😭
@@MrShaiya96 It made me a strong woman.
This is weird but I love romance stories from back in the day. I’m fascinated by interracial or gay couples who got together in the 50s/60s or even before that. You figure if you are willing to be with someone who will make it so that your life is in danger just being with them, then you have to love them.
@@chevon1920 infatuation is a powerful breeding mechanism in mammals' brains. not as grand as you propose
Why raise your kids to not see colour like seeing people’s colour is a bad thing. You shouldn’t have to ignore my race to treat me with respect. That is what is racist.
I married an Italian woman, we worked because we agreed on how to raise children, due to similar cultures and beliefs, we didn't make it but we are co-parenting amazing, something I'm not seeing among some of my other friends. I've always been an equal opportunity dater, Indian, Black, Asian, white. I like the way you approached this topic man, appreciate you!
You're Zoe bro? Know one of my home boys with the same last name.
They always use to say black is beautiful what happened. Is it not ture????? 👈. 😎
I am a black man and I have always had a preference for black women to date.
I have felt empathy with black women and I want my children to be a reflection of myself and a black woman.
I want 100% black children or almost 100% black children.
You’re a statistic. Another black guy making single moms
I'm married to a Persian woman. The best decision I ever made. Without her I would not have had the success I've had. She built me up. She stuck by me when times got hard. Even through the thick was thick we made it. We been together twenty years.
She's not materialistic or into fake lashes and fake nails.
She knows that the more I'm built up we both are built up. We both have success. That's success
Aww happy for you bro.
One thing is true...everyone needs to have people around them that brings them up, makes them feel good, makes them laugh. Success breeds success.
so you need a woman to build you and teach you how to be a man? little boy. but i understand, you probably had no dad...
Wow poor Persian woman is really struggling being married to this dusty. Can't even get a $40 mani/pedicure. Hope she told her daughter to choose better.
@@NoaNoir go somewhere else hair hat
Im white, 44 , divorced . I now date only black men, I really never was attracted to white men. And it’s a lot a personality thing not only the looks. Watching your video hoping I find my one and only 40+ man.
I went to the same high school as B Tatum in which was 75% black. He's spot on about being interjected into a different culture. I got a job at age 16 that was in a more white area and was around a different culture than what I was used to at school. It opened up my mind big time and white women were just kinder towards me, I ended up marrying white woman later on and love her to death.
"Stop looking at race and start looking at love."
What an insightful meaningful statement!
Thanks for the video and the heart felt comments.
Your leadership is much appreciated.
LOVE.....this world needs MORE OF IT!!!!!
And White Women are loving Big Black Men! 💕💕💕, why else are they being being liberals and who are the ones voting in SOOOO many Big Black Men to come inside, and replace the local men of Europe and Usa? Its love... and lust 💕
FACTS 💯😉👌🏽
The LGBTQ people will be like 'Stop looking at gender and start looking at love 'They know how to twist everything.😢
Tell black men that when they deal with black women.
Love is love no matter what your color or the color of your significant other.
Same here I just choose Asian women Bc my mom was born in Thailand and I find Asians more attractive than white girls
love is love? watch out there , recently the left tried to push that narrtive on us, love is love, dont matter the age. look into it. big yiikes
Exactly, some black are just brainwashed for what ever reason but complain about racism. And they say things like this 🤦🏾♂️
@@heavyiron3572 I get you. I am careful not to endorse pedophiles having relationships with children.
YES! It’s about the person. It’s crazy that we’re focusing so much on skin color.
If it's not about race and skin color, then why do they ALWAYS get a *WHITE WOMAN??* Why don't they get something that's not European or white??
I date and could marry a white woman, a black woman, a brown woman or an Asian woman. It has nothing to do with skin color to me. It's who you vibe with and who makes you a better person.
You do realize race is a lot more than skin right?
I agree
@@shawnm2405 no, actually we are all the same race. The main difference is skin color and melanin. Obviously there are cultural differences but that is simply learned behavior. So no, not at all.
@@Beastlife50 doctors can tell your race just by looking at the bones. Your can't just get blood transfusions and transplants from just anyone either. So who are you trying to fool? Mixing is wrong and evil. There are consequences for violating natural law. Mixing is putting the nation on path to war.
Please reveal to me a white person or black person
The values thing very important. I am a black brit of Nigerian heritage and my husband is Togolaise. When we were dating we talked about kids and how we'd like to raise them. Also our family backgroud are very similiar, we both grew up in a two parent household and our parents had long marriages until both my father and father in law passed. I married in Togo and the meeting of the families was just beautiful. My husband is in charge of the finances because hes better at it and hes smart with money. I am the organiser of family trips and the household. When it comes to our daughter raise her together. Overall I am grateful that we can provide her with the security that our parents gave us. I agree marry for love and a value system that is for you regardless of colour.
I enjoyed your comment. Thank you Michelle.🙂...we split our duties too. He earns the bucks...and I spend them, because I'm better at it!😜...kiiiiidding. There has to be cooperation and partnership the way you describe. I'm good with the budgeting side so he calls me 'the banker', and I know he appreciates that about me. Greetings from NY.
Yes. People are afraid to allow someone to share the responsibilities or they feel weak. It’s great when two people come together and fill all the gaps with their strengths.
Im a white man in my early 30's ,and I married a black woman from Nigeria. We have been married over 3 years ,and we have a 10 month old daughter. She is my best friend ,and has made me a better Christian. One thing I was told a long time ago is that if you want to have a happy marriage in the long-term, your spouse needs to be your best friend.
Where are these black women who say "I Don't need a man?" WHERE are the ones who don't cook and clean and want to raise kids etc? And we're not ambitious? or loving or vulnerable? I don't know a single black women like the stereotype/generalizations he mentions. Sad that he has to criticize and talk down about black women in order to rationalize his choices. There are all types of black women in all different types of "cultures" and spaces. I guess its for likes and personal validation, but not necessary to disparage black women. This makes me So sad, such narrow opinions and helping to perpetuate sickening stereotypes. :(
You don’t date BW do you? So you probably wouldn’t have the depth of his experience or men like him.
I'm glad you said the word "culture". My Wife is Black, I am white and one of the many things my Queen has taught me is Black America has their own culture. Words have different meanings. Situations are handled differently. Social dynamics are different and if you don't understand this you will read situations incorrectly. Black Americans know this and are used to White culture because they've been in and around it their whole lives. Many of us White Americans have not experienced Black culture. If more of us knew this I believe a whole lot of our problems would go away.
Spot on sir, I 100% agree with you there.
Agree 100 percent 👌 👍 👏 💯
I disagree with that. No one will fully understand other cultures, it's about acceptance and strength. The problems go away after personal growth and acceptance. Relying on external sources to "understand" another culture will be futile. Communication and personal growth will get you further.
@@tonye.5410 ok that's your opinion. For me finding a teacher is faster that figuring it out on my own. Just relaying my process.
Many whites do not understand Black culture because we were never invited to take part in it. I have found there are some words some Blacks use as a secret language and then accuse whites of not being open and accepting of them
Again not all blacks but many. In my experience it’s 50/50 so what’s a white personal suppose to do😢
I just keep my guard up
As a black women i can agree with your opinion 🦋 I was taught not to need a man. I was taught in a household where my brothers was the men in the home. My out look on men was not to much. I was taught to be a strong black women. SMH at 37 I’m inner-standing and unteaching my self things to understand different cultures. Now open to date outside
my race. Thanks for the insight 🦋
U should go read the willie lynch letters an u will see why some black women play mother an father in the household especially being we have the most men in prison in the United States
You got this girl 😌😌
Hell yeah date who ever you are attracted too! Date some one that you have a lot of things in common with and hopefully this person will become your best friend!
I can totally relate to you. I got so tired of hear " Im a strong black woman." That's not our role.
lynn's journey well go be a weak black woman wtf
In my personal experiences, I never chose a white woman. They always chose me. And accepted me. For me. I wanted things to work with black women and often times pursued them. But, they didn't accept me, and I wasn't bout to put on just for them to like me
I think I know more white men that are married a black women than the other way around
👀🤣🤣🤣🤣
Stop bro 😂don’t make it seem like there wasn’t ANY black women that would accept you for you
@@StopListenThink Im white and my gf is Jamaican. I'm not really "into" black women, every other gf I've had has been white but we just got along really well and she laughed at my jokes lol.
@@Themegatrolll Self hatred
My fiance is a white military woman US Army Officer and I get a lot of hate from Black women and White men. I asked my fiance why do you like black men she told me that she never thought that she would fall in love with a black guy until she met me .she told me that my skin color didn't matter because she saw my potential as a man when she realized I trained in martial arts like Karate and Muay Thai she fell in love with me because she seen my true nature and spirit 💯
You want a woman who is going to be nice to you." Those words are so simple yet profound. And its amazing how many women don't get that. Don't get that to their very core.
Feminism has taught so many women not to value men.
At all.
I know. They think a strong woman is the same thing as a bitchy woman. I already have a boss; I don't need another one.
@Al S it's hard to be nice to someone else when you really don't like yourself. Most of these women have been raised in an environment where there's really no joy. And when and if they let their guard down to a man, they get dogged out. Vicious circle
Look at how relationships are portrayed in shows now. The men are belittled and emasculated and it’s seen as funny. Just like a lot of modern women brag about not cooking or cleaning or being intimate with their husbands. It’s “ cool” not to love your spouse and to complain about them. I don’t understand any of that. It sounds miserable.
It's hard to be nice to someone when they already have the perception you are angry all the time and won't give you a chance because of their poor generalisations
Well said Officer Tatum! I married my best friend and have a wonderful life. The moment I met her I knew it was going to be special. I'm a Caucasian and she is an American born Chinese.
Having been in law enforcement for the last 27 years, a white male and in February celebrating my 27th wedding anniversary to my black wife, man do I have stories.
I understand where he is coming from but I just don’t want to be stereotyped to not be agreeable or not have a good healthy upbringing. The only way to change this is to change the culture or behavior by showing love and help with healing not running away to other cultures or races.
Your not argumentative. He's just saying that because hes self hating and needs an excuse. Your beautiful date who u love don't listen to men who don't love themselves and need shape ups lookin raggedy insulting women regardless of their race. Most marriages between black men n ww fail. But he doesn't talk about that. Most marriages between wm an bw are statistically successful, but he doesn't talk about that. Bw are not the problem and soon the world will know that. It's cool to date outside but don't shade others like this guy. Weirdo behavior
I married a Black woman because I never gave up hope that good Black women exist, and guess what? I found one!!!
:)
That’s a sorry situation that you found yourself in but I am glad that you were patient enough to dig through the trash to find a pearl of a Woman.
Don’t be mad at me. You nearly gave up hope thinking that a Black Woman existed worth marrying.
@@davidbrawner7679you couldn’t wait to say some silly stuff huh?
@@913NUPE What I have said is only silly to those who lack common sense.
Amen. good for you.
I’m a 50+ black woman. I respect your choice. You do you. However! If a woman has not experienced the love of a father or brother or uncle that is invested in her as a child or a teenager or a woman, then she will most likely not “need” a man. The culture that provides the support of their women and values their women will produce women who are courageous, generous, agreeable, smart, confident, etc. . That “culture” consists of the male and the female component. If neither “component” has the heart to stay and mend the culture then the perceived weakest link of that “culture” will continue to be devalued and left behind. My daughters are strong black women and very confident in who they are in Christ and although I may be seen as a role model for them I believe their father(my husband) invested in them, loves them and values them. The love of a FATHER makes a huge difference in the character of a woman. Let’s help the culture by encouraging the men to stand up and be fathers while love with the love of God. I’m happy you’re content but let’s help redefine the “culture”.
you are partially correct, we can also encourage the "women" to be flexible, agreeable, and most importantly, daughters of Christ. He isn't simply stating culture, he is laying it as the foundation to why people may choose certain scenarios after exposure. One scenario is marriage, and this has resonated with me. I have been married for 22 years and it's because of the agreeability, and synergy in Christ my wife and I have. My wife was encouraged to always do her part, not looking at the other components, and so it was for me. Redefinition of culture only comes from a redefining of the heart.
You're absolutely right. There would be less people looking outside the culture if people would fix it. It's been a hot mess for far too long.
T MD, great comment!
I want to add that “cultures” exist everywhere. Each family has a culture, each church, school, organization, etc.
I don’t think the word “culture” should be used to define black people in the U.S. To do so is to ignore black people as individuals and instead to define a stereotype.
I think more people, esp women, need to hear this, because both son and daughter need to know what its like to have a stable family and/or a good father and/or male role model who is their father.
However I do feel for the women who did not grow up with a stable family and/or a decent father who may have been abusive. I'm taking a risk myself you could say, but I'll have to see where it leads me ultimately.
Thank you so much for your candid response to this opinionated video. I literally could not have said it better. I usually watch this gentleman on a daily basis as a beautiful black woman that I am, but after dissecting this video, I will carry my interests elsewhere. I have no hate for any race true conservative and have been married to a black man over 28 years now and yes we have our problems and struggles but I appreciate the effort on his part to not run from responsibility as a black man and help raise responsible black sons who will be proud of their culture and the black queens that are out there.
I’m a white dude and my gf is black/Hispanic. We just clicked really well, she gets my humor and i can’t help but smile everytime I see her. I’m gunna marry that woman.
What are you waiting on?!?! Just do it!
@@truthseekerredonly1987 haha yeah your probably right I mean we’ve been together 2 and a half years idk if it’s too soon to pop the question. Also I gotta get the ring first lol.
@@weignerleigner3037 Not too soon. Go buy a ring even if it’s from Walmart.
I’m a black woman who was first married to a white man. We had children together but culturally it was quite difficult to agree on raising children. I have been married to my black husband for 19 years. We also have a daughter together. My black husband helped raise my sons from my first marriage.
We understand each other. We are also healing to each other. I adore him. Marriage is not easy, but we have each other’s back always. ❤
So wonderful
I think this is stupid .... what is the point of this?? You shouldn't have to explain why you like or want something. Unless you're doing it for the wrong reasons..
🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮💩💩💩💩💩💩🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Beautiful family . I’m a white man and chose an Asian woman …. She’s smarter than me for sure 😂
i would choose a black woman, i dont know why, but i am very attracted to black women
I'm attracted to Women
@@saltyclanker8440 hey it's all good, I found mine, and I know she has the right parts 👍. But Women...let me say that again Women, biological women is God's greatest creation 😍
Ha ha ha 😂 🤣
I’ve dated all black women for years. It’s not even a big deal when I show interest in a black woman. They can tell I am interested in who they are and not a color
Stay with your own
Then why are the ALL black??
@@glitbow7630 nah he can come over here to black women.
Thanks so much for making this video. I am a black woman I always wondered why black men marry white women. Don’t let anyone try to make you feel bad about who you married!
They feel bad about it, thats whyn they feel they have to defend it.
@@r.walker7986exactly!
It's about attraction, liking each other as people, and shared values. Not necessarily in that order, but all three must be present.
We are so afraid to date outside our race because of family not believing that it's OK. I've never been racist. My son in law is black. My man is black. I dated Mexican men and even married one. They were abusive mentally and physically. The man I fell in love with now has always been good to me. Never raised his hand to me. Total respect. We have similar interests and I've shown him what real love feels like. His Ex only cares about money. She was abusive verbally and physically. So we both came from similar situations. Brought us closer. Love who you love like you said. As long as you're happy and treated right don't pay any mind to family or friends opinions. They aren't the ones living your life.
Or, because a particular race is a preference, which is OK.
I’m in an interracial relationship now and I love it. You like who you like- race shouldn’t matter.
It's 2021 and you need to say that...
It's sad but we have so much more evil to overcome.
Thank you so much for this post because I am a black woman who grew up in the military and most of my family members married outside of their race and had nothing to do with race it's just like you said it's culture is what we were used to what we knew what we felt comfortable with and a lot of my relatives are interracial children we've got to get past all this racial political nonsense because it's never about the color of your skin it's about your heart especially those of you who call yourself Christians wake up and the media who want to keep us strangled in this so-called segregated lifestyle and it's just not true so thank you so much for speaking the truth because I'm tired of hearing it too this is 2024 grow up people
One of the things that I always found odd ....being raised around the hood and in a area that's over 80 percent black is when black date white woman and say there's nothing wrong with it but as soon as someone who ain't black dates a black girl in they area they get mad and say it ain't right that always grinded my gears cause what's good for the goose is good for the gander..
I agree pretty hypocritical and sad
Black people can't be racist apparently
I was married to a black Trinidadian in 1976. I am an European American. I encountered many of those same negative comments. So did my husband. People saw the obvious difference in our complexions but failed to see the similarities in our cultural and religious backgrounds. I married who I loved, not who I looked like.
Thanks for sharing. I find it interesting that a lot of white men on the thread are sharing their love for their black wives. So its weird to see this black police officer indirectly insinuating that as a generalized group, black women are somehow disagreeable. This is a red flag and a problem.
Loved "I married who I loved, not who I looked like. "
Religious and cultural backgrounds. So true for all kinds of relationships. I learned that I had a lot of common values with my Filipino and Mexican friends because we were Roman Catholic. Not just the religious practice but the values and moral part of out being.
My father is Trinidadian
I am Trini. 68 years.
My son was married to an Afro American. The marriage didn't last, but there were 2 girls out of the union. One is 9, the other 7. Both were born in the US, but the latter has NEVER been to our homeland.
My son goes to the US every 6 months to visit his daughters. The mother is bitter and insulting.
What i would like to say is the only common thread Afro-Trinidadians and Afro-Americans have is that their ancestors came from Africa.
They are like different races !
To each his/her own. I’m a black man and I choose to stick with my black queens.
First of all in order to be a King or Queen one must have A Kingdom or Queendom to rule over and the last time that I checked neither Black Men and Black Women have the aformentioned.
@@MegaFELIPE48 malding
Black Queen, as she rules you....smh.
Racist???
A Black man who will have black child has spoken
The way you act and talk I never thought you heard a black woman
I wasn’t surprised at all that he was married to a white woman. 🤦🏾
I'm a Black man who loves Black women...Period !!
That’s good if that works for you, I do agree with what Tatum is saying.. it’s about culture and character, values and practices. 👌👌
Lmao.. nice buddy
And it’s fine to like a certain type of person. I’m white and was only attracted to white men. I’ve been married to the greatest man I know for 35 yrs.
Good for you...?
I’m a Black man who loves women…Period!! So much so I married one who happens to be White.
I'm everything you say your wife is and im black, I have a father in my life, im a professional, i own my own house ppl just talk down on black women so much that ppl seem to believe all the bad stuff they hear, not all black women are ratchet.
Nothing is NEVER ALL!
Uncle Tatum hates black women.
@@marcthompson4875 No one has to like anybody. Damn.
There are both...some good black man out there, AND good black women in the world
Exactly!
I notice these days black women are starting to date out a lot more and more open to it, which is good keep your options open you’re more likely to find someone compatible
Black men been doing this
They’re not really but they should.
@@milwaukeemac9195 we are in married to a Brazilian man
Black women have been dating out for years. They just struggle to marry out. Their IR marriage rate has also decreased
How about people just choose who they want and the narcissistic people who are offended by someone else's choice mind their business?
It's one thing if you like white women, but when you put it out there that "black men choose white women" as if they're the best thing ever it looks like you have no self respect and you find validation in knowing you have a white woman.
He didn't even think about the young malleable black men who may see this and internalize it as truth, or more importantly the young black girls who see this and become even more self conscious about their looks. Black girls already have to deal with alot when it comes to desirability politics.
When you see a black girl get angry when a black dude says "I like white girls" it's not because of "preference," it's because of ppl like this who perpetuate the idea of "black men prefer white women." And for the record I don't like it when black women do it either.
Well this comment serction is full of Blk Women doing it so call them out too or stop hating.
I get what you're saying, but honestly desirability politics about black women are still based on how the black woman's culture is perceived. An example is who Black women choose to date. I see Black women dating black guys who have nothing to offer. They are only dating these guys because they are black and dark skin. I see black couples out in public all the time, where the man is jobless, the woman is paying for everything, they are arguing about who the black man is cheating with, the man has multiple kids with multiple women he's not married to. Meanwhile, "I'm not worthy of a Black woman" because I'm lightskin and mixed raced. The only black women available to me are used up or have nothing to offer. So what am I supposed to do? Of course I date outside of my race at that point.
LMAO, there are literally comments of BLACK WOMEN PUTTING DOWN BLACK MEN WHILE PRAISING WHITE MEN. Why don't you have the same energy for that ?
@@aweba25 You've never met my daughters. If you don't love God, you will get no attention! They don't want just a man of a certain color, they want a man who has morals and loves them with all his heart. Don't put yourself down, you were wonderfully and beautifully made. Don't let the wrongs of others create a root of bitterness in you. You do you.
@@PeerlessUtopian Individual character and confidence are stronger traits than subjective generalities that are birthed from bad experiences. Don't let the negative opinions of others get to you.
One of my teenage sons is dating a black girl rn. She’s very sweet and calm and lovely. It IS about culture, because not long ago, another one of my sons brought over a white girl, but she was acting….I don’t know how to say it. But she was loud, not well spoken, and was basically what we would call “ghetto” and we were like, “no.” It has nothing to do with race and everything to do with culture. We even live in the south, where everyone says the racist are, and I’m not gonna lie, they’re around. But mostly in the older generations.
Thank you for addressing this! When I was in college there was a white guy who was madly in love with a black girl. Sweetest Christian girl from a good, solid family. She lived across the hall from me in the dorms. Anyway, he wanted to propose to her, but his parents vehemently opposed the marriage. She ended up breaking up with him over it and has yet to get married 15 years later. He begrudgingly married a girl (white) that his parents chose for him, and it is a loveless marriage. It’s so sad. We’re all just different shades of brown. It’s terrible when people put melanin above emotional health.
Ma'am I appreciate your comment, thank you
So are you telling me that in your story the white parents are the villains? Cause listening to Tarum he said it was blacks with the poor culture. Odd
Let me guess, you date black? You look like the type.
@@soyELkuko Thats not what he said, Go and listen again. Just because we have issues doesn't mean someone cant call us out on them. The truth is the truth.
@@tonye.5410 what issues? And are those issues exclusive to one race or another?
He has said he never had sushi until he went into the "white culture". He said that he never knew of the nuclear family until he saw it in the "white culture". He said he thought organic foods was defected until he was educated (following his line of thoughts from white culture).
He said black nfl or NBA players marry white cause of culture. Use your head please. Does that mean that these young black players dont marry black women cause they are as Kayne West (Trump supporter) dang about GOLD DIGGER? And white women are not gold digger. Right, your absolutely right. White women can't be gold diggers. They cant cause it's in their culture.
Use your mind. His statements of culture are all stereotypes.
Fam have a lifetime history with the Snow Bunny crisis. No beef with you, love your Snow Bunny. There's no way I can ever procreate with a snow bunny. My wife is Ghanaian, and I'm Liberian. We keep the tree growing in the original traditions. Thanks to my father, he plants the seeds that keep the tradition growing. Peace and love, however...
OMG PREACH!!! As a woman, very few times I have had this conversation with other people (about women being "old school" and serving your husband) and I haven't had any pushback. Most likely because of my heritage and background (1st gen Mexican and no father). It is seen nowadays by some that there is something really wrong if you wish you please and serve your husband. I believe this is because these people/women have not really ever felt what true love is. "Serving" does not mean being a slave. Men and women compliment each other. It is in our nature and I hope more people from the younger generation can experience this because it is something wonderful. I am truly blessed to have found the love of my life, who I have met for many many lives and keep running into each other. Love is eternal.
I know exactly where your coming from! I feel the same way while heartedly. My Husband is my King of our home and I am his Queen.
Amen. My husband and I both had horrible relationships in the past. Because of that we are a team, putting each other first. He is the head of our household, and we respect him as such. Decisions are made together, and compromise is abundant, so is personal growth. I enjoy all of Tatums content, for approaching subjects others will not! Love the reality perspective!!
@@kimkilpatrick2158
That’s my story as well. My wife and I are best friends and we love to serve each other. Neither of us take each other for granted and we show the upmost respect towards each other... We have this thing we say, where if things get a little tense, one of us will stop and say to the other “we are better than that”. I can’t tell you how often that stops myself, or my wife, dead in our tracks. It’s immediately followed by an apology by both of us.... I love making her happy, and I know she loves making me happy!!! There’s one thing I’ve learned over the years is that everyone wants to feel validated, respected, and loved.
My white son has a gorgeous black girlfriend. She is tall thin smart and comes from a good family .
wrong choice.
I heard you say how BW don't know how to treat a man b/c their father wasn't there. Well by the same token BM never saw the dynamic of how a man is supposed to treat a woman either.
In your previous video, you said you wanted to be part of the culture that values marriage and family. That is a culture that you admit is not prevalent in the black community.
Since men are the gatekeepers of marriage -- then by your own observation BM do not value marriage and family as a collective.
In light of this, BW who want better outcomes need to open up their dating options to other races of men. This 'black love' thing isn't working and is really a lie.
I think many Bw are doing just that!! Opening their options. I’m 21, I never thought this day would come. Bw are no longer stuck with crumbs, they are loving themselves and choosing better everyday☺️☺️
I think his point was black women tend to be argumentative , combative , loud , the sort of thing that will drive just about any man away .
@@willardsandy2589 We’re dealing with and living amongst the most volatile and v10lent men in the US!! I’m not sure what more can be expected😂 This community is never going to produce princesses. Lol
@@willardsandy2589 can you blame them when they are surrounded by men that abandon them and are the most violent in the country? You think women can relax and feel safe with these type of men?
@@mememinaa7052 - All Officer Tatum did in this video is highlight the failures of B.Males. According to Officer Tatum safe and thriving communities don't exist in the B.C. because B.Males don't know how to create them.
So they have to go run to the WM's community marry his daughter and nest away in what the WM has created.
These B.Males are inadequate in their manhood and are simply seeking to rest in their femininity in the WM's patriarchy.
That was what the whole Civil Rights Movement was all about. B.Males gaining access to Becky and nesting in the WM's society.
They complain about R/WS but they knew it was racist beforehand. B.Males can't be taken seriously --
BW divest and allow B.Males to go over to Becky so that we can finally stop having their babies and birthing them into existence. They are doing us a great favor.
The problem that I have with interracial dating is that you may end up in an interracial relationship whether you want to or not.