I'm calling it, Turk wanted the invite so he could do the I OBJECT at the wedding, which would magically make Maria realize she loved him, the great Turk, all along.
Turk caused his own mess, but I will have to argue it's not his fault that his parents got uninvited from the wedding. Partially, yes, but for the most part, it's the parent's own fault for being enabling, narrow-minded idiots playing favoritism between their two kids and picking the one that played stupid games to win stupid prizes. At least we know where Turk gets it from XD
100% plus extra because the situation was explained to the parents before, and they still tried to play the 'because I'm the parent the truth doesn't matter just do what I want' card. Let them all stay home.
When I finally got fed up and cut contact with my half sister, I told my mom, "She's not my sister anymore, she's just some woman you gave birth to." and my mom said that was fair. I didn't make my mom choose sides, and my mom would give me a head's up in advance when Toxic planned to come to town so that I could avoid my parents' house. Like, I knew my mom still loved my half sister, because that was her kid. But I wasn't gonna forgive Toxic since she never showed any remorse for the crap she pulled, and my mom never tried to push me to do that, because that rift was between Toxic and me, not me and my mom or her and my mom.
Or he just likes what his brother has, of what we've seen it seems the other brother was good with Jen so turk was jealous so he snatched her, when she revealed being no good and his ex was with his brother now and happy then he decided he wants his brother's happiness, I think he just looks at what his brother has because maria was there from the beginning and he chose to let her go
I guess their personalities aligned better because they both don't treat their partners very well and are both cheaters and betrayers of supposed loved ones
And she's not wrong! I should have told my ex-girlfriend when she threatened that other guys were trying to steal her from me, "If you are that easily stolen from me, they can have you!"
When a side chick gets the man, he becomes her problem now 😂😂 a cheating man is NOT a prize. It's only a matter of time before he does her dirty as well.. 🤷♀️
It’s always wild to me when someone does the “I don’t understand why my family member is shutting me out” when they’ve behaved in a wretched way. I am so so tired of the “you have to forgive because we’re family.” No. No, I don’t. Just because we’re related by some measure or another doesn’t mean I have to be disrespectful to myself as a person to accommodate you and your comfort. Respect and consideration goes both ways, regardless of “family bonds.” And I say this as someone with a very wonderful and loving family. I would do anything for my family, but if they burn that bridge, we’re done.
Forgiveness is for the forgiver, not the forgiven, they may never even know they’ve been forgiven. We can forgive others as God commands us to do, regardless of their relation to us and still cut association with them. The two are not the same, so forgiving others is a must to moving on happily with our lives, IMHO. You can still refuse to associate with them. 🙂
This is why it’s possible to divorce from your family and change your name. People have done it throughout history. It’s not even close to new. It’s such a toxic mind trick to try and manipulate them into letting you constantly abuse them. Break the cycle, end the abuse.
I absolutely HATE the "but it's family" argument. Over the summer my aunt (mom's 2nd eldest sister) was in hospital on her deathbed & wanted to drive up to see her. But my other aunt (mom's eldest sister) barred her from going. Yelling at my mom saying "she fine. Don't go visit her" Meanwhile her & my uncle (mom's brother) secretly got a fight the next day to see my aunt. Aunt died the day after they visited. This pissed me off beyond belief because it's not the first time they did this (they did the exact same thing when my grandma (mom's mom) died. I refused to go back home to the "celebration of life" ceremony. Got a text from my brother demanding I go because "it's FaMiLy" I didn't budge. While my mom was up there she wound up having a mild heart attack. Her only vistors were my dad, brother, my uncle & his wife. When they got back home my mom texted her sister saying she was in the hospital. Aunt texts back "oh yea, I know" 😠 No "How are you feeling? Are you doing okay?" Nothing. I have cut off a majority of my mom's side because they're all terrible people. My mom still talks to everyone (she's a people pleaser) She sent out a group chat wishing everyone a happy Thanksgiving only to be met with an incoming text that she has been blocked by one member of the family. That person is my aunts husband. No clue as to why he blocked her. And she only got a response from two people. One of my 5 cousins & my one cousins wife. To say my mom was heartbroken is an understatement. Family is not blood. It's the people who are there for you in good times & bad.
@@ladyliberty5771 that’s on your daughter to forgive. Not you. And as far as I’m concerned, he doesn’t really deserve it after something like that. But coming to terms with abuse and seeking therapy really does help you forgive. From one victim to another. You survive despite them. Not in spite of them. 💋🌈❤️ much love bestie. That’s rough. Stay strong momma.
This is exactly what narcissists do when they lose control. Guilt, shame, tantrums, etc…. They will do whatever they need to get under the skin of the person and cause enough harm to get them crawling back
Let’s not forget Maria. Even if “Arthur” would give up and consider inviting his brother, Maria would not be pleased to have Turk at her wedding. It’s not a good idea to ignore your future wife’s feelings.
I find it interesting that Turk hasn’t spoken to his brother in four years, but suddenly wants to be buddies again now that he’s found out Arthur’s dating/marrying Maria. Especially considering he said it devastated him because he wanted to reconnect with her. Arthur’s no fool and isn’t giving his problematic brother the opportunity to cause problems in his relationship again. I hope the happy couple continues to live in bliss, without all the family drama. ❤
Something tells me if douche brother got invited to the wedding, he would have made some over the top scene and spectacle of himself. He was fine kicking Maria and his brother to the curb to get what he wanted, so who's to say he wouldn't muck up his brother's wedding in an attempt to get back what he wanted? In this case, Maria.
I feel like parents might have been in on it too, why else would they push for him to get the invite, I feel most people still having feelings for their ex would not want to come to the exes wedding unless they had some delusions they could win them back
It’s not often these cheating stories where family is involved and the injured party is the one who is bullied to forgive and forget has a great ending! This one did! Kept firm with the boundaries, didn’t respond to the BS, the wedding and honeymoon didn’t get disrupted by disrespectful family… just awesome. Wishing this couple all the best! 🎉❤
Son-husbands are a thing. My sister married one and he always chose his toxic mother over her. She ended up divorcing him. His sister is also dysfunctional from being infantilized by the mother. Always consider the effect of your in-laws and choose wisely.
The more AITA posts I see, the more I’m realizing toxic men are derived from toxic mothers… the number of mothers who protect the bad behavior of their sons is astounding
It's the boy moms honestly. But sometimes it's the garbage dad's too. Andrew Tate's dad for example was the worst. His mom and sister on the other hand want him in jail.
Mental conditions like this runs genetically in some family lines regardless of gender. In this case, it seems to be from the mother's side of the family.
Girl, I am so glad that I found you and your reactions. This legit helps me to raise my two boys to not be brats. To remember that if one does something wrong, they have to apologize to the other. They are still young enough to learn not to be an a55 to each other. Also helps to remind me not to favor one over the other. I have a 11 year old and a 9 year old currently. My husband and I are doing our best to raise them to not be jerks to each other, like the brothers in this story.
I can tell you, as a former teacher, it is not the parents who are self aware enough to worry that they might raise jerks who have crotch goblins but the ones who are delulu enough to think they are doing everything right. My colleague (who is still in 😮) and I used to say during every parent teacher conference that within 10 s of meeting the parent, we could tell why their kid was who they were. Always blamed the adults and not the kids though. It’s the Dunning Kruger effect viewed through parenting.
Saying "we're family" for forgiveness doesn't negate (or gives a free pass, get out-of-jail-free care) the actions that you've done. In fact, it should be the very last person that you could do this to.
A good parent should NEVER have favorites...and if one does happen to have a favorite, a good parent will NEVER let you be able to tell which one it is. A heartfelt thank you to all the GOOD parents out there. Y'all deserve the best!
Exactly. Another reason why they should hide which is favorite is because statistically the favorite will betray/abandon the parents later on in life....and since having favorites could chase away the only ones who would have been willing to help.....that's another reason not to have favorites.
For years I would occasionally mention I knew my baby sister was the favourite but whatevs. My mother insisted she didn’t have a favourite. She loved us equally. First Christmas I spent with the whole family, after my mum got married, and my new adult step-siblings my new stepsister asked my mum who her favourite kid was because SHE was her dad’s favourite. Again, my mum said the same thing. My stepsister said, “Naw. It’s (baby sister). You can tell.” 🤣
The sad thing is that while they brought up the “but we’re family” argument, no body even thought about how terrible it would be for Maria to have her cheating ex at her wedding. Like even if Turk and the parents don’t care about op, the audacity of disrespecting the bride like that is absurd
Seriously, whenever I hear or read a cheater say they had "a moment of weakness", it makes me want to throw up a little. Someone who loves and is loyal to their partner doesn't make a "mistake" nor has "a moment of weakness" in the first place. People don't "trip" into each other by mistake. lol
Also, a moment of weaknesses that lasted a week! They cheated at the party (I wonder why they went to that party without their partners) and they cheated again a week later.
Yea, like "Turk" sugar-coated HIM cheating on HIS BROTHER and GIRLFRIEND with her BEST FRIEND but when HE got cheated ON he didn't sugar coat it. It's pure narcissistic behaviour and he tried it to do it AGAIN
I feel for OP. My mother did the same thing for my half sister. Always saying, “she my daughter”, as a means to say she could do no wrong. Even after I would say, “I’m your daughter too”, she would still take her side. When the half sister died, my mother begged me to go to her funeral, I said, “No she was a monster to me”, she would get mad that I wouldn’t go. I just didn’t care, and stood my ground, no matter how many times she begged. With my brother being the middle child, and I’m the baby, you would think that I was spoiled, no I am the forgotten one. My brother will ask for anything and both my parents will drop whatever it is they are doing to go help. My brother will keep them out for hours to watch his kids, (parents are too old don’t need to be staying out past 12am with no update on when they are going home). I’ve confronted my parents, but they blew me off. I’ve confronted my brother about making our parents stay out too late (sometimes mom complains she is out past 8 and just wants to come home), he says he’ll do better, only to go back to his ways. I will try to help my mom, even if I don’t exist to her sometimes, tell them I need them to come home, they still take a couple of hours to get home, but if it was my brother they would be right there. I will still help my parents even if I am forgotten by them.
You deserve better... You should go very low or no contact for a while and see if you feel better. I think you will. Also, if you aren't in therapy already I highly suggest it as it works wonders, especially in situations like this. I am just talking from experience, as I was in a very similar situation but I am the oldest. My brother is just under two years younger than me and was always the favorite, could do no wrong, and constantly manipulated my mother growing up and still does. Then my half sister was born when I was 15, and the only use I had was helping take care of her, otherwise I was pretty much ignored and neglected. I now have very limited contact with my family, and live a state away so I only see and talk to them on my terms. It has been such a huge weight off my shoulders.
why are u putting yourself in the position to be a doormat for your parents who seem like they don't care a whit about u? this is self sabotaging and self hurt. u are allowing them to walk all over u and so nothing will change because u are allowing this behaviour. I am the baby too have brother and sister. and other than my mom who was wonderful and died at 17 i was treated like trash by them and father. i walked away over 20 yrs ago and my life was so much better. NEVER let someone use u for a door mat no matter how much u love them parents included. they don't love u when they are behaving like this. like u said u don't exist for them except as someone they can use. grow a backbone and walk away at least no contact for a while to see if they realize and change their behaviour. if they don't then don't look back keep walking. as long as u remain u will be forgotten and used and no one deserves a life of that. good luck.
Never have I seen a post that so perfectly encapsulated the maxim, "there are 3 sides to every story: your side, their side, and the truth." Holy cannoli cream.
OMG I am so excited! I heard Turk's delusional side and was dying to get the full picture from his brother. The parents are even worse than I thought. I think the full picture was clear to the parents without needing a more detailed explanation because the "full picture" was evidenced by THEIR SON DATING HIS BROTHER'S EX-GIRLFRIEND IMMEDIATELY AFTER THEY BROKE UP! If that isn't evidence enough of what happened for the parents, they're just dumb or pretending to be.
I had a similar issue. Was dating a guy for a few months when he started getting weird and distant. I went to my sister to cry on her shoulder and get her advice on our "relationship". To make matters worse - wait for it.... I worked with this guy. Different buildings in a large organization but our paths would cross professionally semi-regularly - which is how we met. One day at work - he mentioned that he was having trouble getting a hold of my sister and wanted to "thank her for the DINNER she made him last night" - Needless to say - I lost my S#ht but remained professional at the office. I confronted my sister and she claimed she did nothing wrong and went on seeing him. I ended up leaving my job and cutting my sister off for a little over 5 years. When I got married - I didn't want the back stabber at the wedding. So much family drama and people took sides. In the end - I had to hire security to keep her out of the wedding. Because we got married at a pretty posh hotel and booked a suite of rooms for out of town guests - I found out later that my brother snuck her into his room. (Why would she even wanted to come knowing I didn't want her there). My wedding photos were a mess - most photos of me were NOT smiling but scanning the room for the backstabber. 24 years latter - we are civil but don't talk about him at all.
your brother is a a hole for sneaking her into his room and helping her ruin your special day. he knew u hired security what a waste of money. i'd be blasting his ass too he knew she wasn't allowed there nor was she wanted so he's just a bad as her. i'd be no contact with them both just like i am my own because they treat me like garbage. i will not subject myself to that crap just because they are family.
Why should family automatically get a free pass for wrongdoings? Just because we're related doesn't mean it's ok for you to treat "family" so horribly, but then play on familial obligation to guilt them into forgiving you. Guess that one brother knows which one is the favorite, so let them have each other to pet each other's egos and blame the world for not coddling to their every whim. 🤢🤮
The short answer is family does *_not_* automatically get a free pass for wrongdoings! What we're really dealing with in this scenario is narcissism, and Golden child syndrome
If anything, certain wrongdoings should be even worse than doing the same thing to strangers, since one's supposed to LOVE their family. I mean, if that's the disrespect certain people give to their loved ones, what can they do to people they don't care about?
Smartest decision by OP. Why do I have the feeling that if they were all invited to the wedding, that the mother would object and the brother would storm the altar and try to propose to his ex-girlfriend/bride during the ceremony?
Forgiveness, isn’t actually for the one who did the wrong. Forgiveness funny enough, is for yourself. You can forgive someone for cheating on you, but just doesn’t mean you have to let them back in your life. I forgave my mean nasty grandmother for making me the scapegoat, but I didn’t try to maintain a relationship.
Everyone demands forgiveness from people. No one has to forgive and it is also not necessary. You can just make peace with yourself, close the chapter and continue to have a way happier life without these people who wronged you. No need to forgive and forget everything that happened, this just helps the offender by continuing their behavior. I don´t forgive (if there is no real realization about wrongdoings or regret of the offender) and this keeps me far away from abusive folks and have a happy life.
@@insideAdirtyMind forgive or you will not be forgiven. It’s not about them acknowledging their mistakes, not everyone can do that. Why hold onto the hot coal expecting the other person to get burnt
@@insideAdirtyMindIF the Lord doesn’t forgive you, what will you do then? I can guarantee you won’t have a happy life. You have to forgive (NOT forget) so all the negativity can leave you and then you become a person filled with light and love ❤️ God Bless you, child and know He loves you with all His heart 💜!
Oh I so can't wait until OP has kids (if they decide to)!! The mom will be grovelling in every way she can think of to get into her grandkids lives. I hope OP stands firm.
My entire family loves you, Charlotte! My 8yo answered your question (re: whose side are you on?) with "I'm just always on Charlotte's side." He adores you.
Sometimes when there are children that act very entitled, it's because the parents spoiled them and encouraged their nasty behavior. I wouldn't be surprised if they parents were fully aware of everything this brother did.
I couldn't be more THRILLED that the JERK of a brother was "broken hearted" when he tried to weasel his way back into Maria's life, and UPSET when he learned she was marrying his brother. I'm GLAD Jen cheated on him. Now, I hope EVERYONE cheats on Jen. She deserves it, BIG TIME. It's amazing how all of the sudden "they are family" when he wants an invite. They certainly WERENT "family" when he was sticking it to Jen while she was with his brother. ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING. I wouldn't have him OR your horrible parents at my wedding either. Good for the brother for putting his foot down.
“These are the consequences of your actions”. In Charlotte’s sing-song voice. And the parents too… supporting the one brother who needs to take an accountability for what he did. Justified in his mind? Maybe, but still morally and plain wrong.
"Sorrows, sorrows. Prayers, prayers"....Kween Charlotte quoting Queen Charlotte (from the Netflix series Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story) is so meta I may p00p!
Charlotte i'm so proud of you. You had an amazing evolution in this Channel and at the same time, you stay true to yourself. Your adorable personality is why so many like me love this Channel and the team that work with you have the same dedication and good vibes. This Channel is so special and thank you for that. I wish you the best. ♥️
My brother and I had a uwritten rule, ”don’t date (hook up with) your brothers ex.” This worked for us, although it would have been weird to break the rule as we are twins. *shiver*
Although me and my brother would never fall for the same person (we're both straight), we still had the "my friends are off limit" rule. There are things your friends know that family shouldn't know, and things the family knows that friends shouldn't know.
My husband is having a similar family drama in regards to his parents expecting him (the victim) to forgive his sister for her atrocious behaviour though she hasn’t apologised and actually doesn’t even acknowledge that she has done anything wrong. She turned his whole family against him, made my baby shower really awkward because everyone was talking about how she wasn’t invited and was “SO UPSET” (but she clearly didn’t care about our baby when she actively blocked my husband getting to the hospital when I was rushed in with complications with the pregnancy after already experiencing a loss previously), and she has been making things hard for his parents when they want to come and see the baby. My husband has broken contact with them twice in 6 months over this and his sister still seems to think she did no wrong and they keep pandering to her. FAMILIES MAN! 😂
Gotta be so careful with these AITAH cause you really don’t know if they’re telling the truth. So glad we got both sides. My ex SIL posted stuff on Reddit to justify the gaslighting she did to my sibling. You just never know what people are leaving out or minimizing in these anonymous posts.
I went through a similar situation in my marriage. The difference being that it didn't involve family, but instead friends, and we were married. My ex husband and I were married and his friend Noah was married to Ashley. They were our "married friends" because we were all newly married (for about a year and a half) and my ex, Evan decided his "personality" matched Ashley's more than Noah's did and they both had affairs between my and Noah's backs. Literally didn't know "personality" matches was a real excuse people made until this video, it's the same excuse my ex used when I caught him. Now he and Ashley are together, I think they make a great couple, since they're both cheaters and I hope Ashley cheats on him and she takes all his money 😘 Edit: For even more context, Evan and I were together for 10 years: dated for 6, engaged for 2 1/2, and married for 1 1/2. Of course I found out later he had cheated on me with my best friend, who stopped talking to me years ago, and also with my next door neighbor. Ashley used to be my friend, I went to her about all the problems in my marriage and she seemed to always have my back. Be careful who you share your life with.
Oh if he cheated on you that many times, than he definitely has already cheated on her. Someone like that doesn't just stop doing things like that because they have married someone else. It has nothing to do with the person they are with at the time, and everything to do with how insecure and selfish they are. Because they most likely just aren't the type that can be Monogamous. But because they are so insecure and selfish they could never handle being in a healthy open relationship where the person is able to be with other people as well, so they cheat. These type of people should not be in relationships at all, let alone be married, but that is what makes them even more selfish and Narcissistic. Because they don't want to be alone, want someone to take care of them, and want to have all the benefits of a loving and caring relationship, without ever actually putting in the real work to deserve that from anyone.
@@jeanams07 Thank you. You explained it perfectly and you're absolutely right. He was a very insecure man from the start, but he insisted he was just misunderstood and me being naive as I was, believed him. When I moved in with him, after he asked me to marry him, everything changed. He accused me of cheating on him numerous times because I was out grocery shopping and I have ADHD so... I was in the candle section when I should've been getting paper plates. Girl, the gaslighting I've been through in those years was horrendous. But because of Charlotte and her channel I now know that if guys start accusing out of nowhere like that, it usually means THEY'RE the ones who are cheating and they're projecting. This channel has really helped me a lot.
People who are so insecure and have such fragile egos (read narcissists in the psychological context) that they must blame everyone but themselves for the consequences of their actions, often follow the same scripts because they are all trying to do the same thing, absolve themselves of guilt and responsibility. They literally cannot handle feeling 💩emotions and will “convert” it to anger at you and the world, especially if they think it impacts how the world at large sees them. So “I couldn’t exercise will power and wanted to feel better about myself and so I did something that broke a promise and hurt you” becomes “they were a better ‘fit’ and you weren’t enough”. Red flags for me are constant complaints where nothing you offer can resolve it because they want your attention, not the solution, and over the top emotional responses that are disproportionate.
It is a special kind of even not only to cheat but also to have as a pool from which he picked out his cheating partners your friends and/or neighbours.
Love this, I’m glad we got to see both sides and it clearly shows that “Turk” is 100% in the wrong and “Arthur” seems like a great guy who got screwed over by his ex, his brother and his mom. I’m so glad he found happiness and is now married and able to move on from his toxic family.
Never the victim, just an instigator like what did he expect to happen. And then the audacity to try again wtf man, you need help. Be happy for your brother and stop trying to take what's his. And Maria seems like a genuine lady and that's what Arthur needs. So Congrats and hopefully your family will realize that they are shitty. Much love and happiness to the couple. And love getting your notifications in the morning and can't wait to open them and watch videos.
Charlotte's Editor.. you are firing on all cylinders here! absolutely awesome inserts, clips, and memes. My god I couldn't care less for anything else, but your inserts make these videos actually worth watching! You deserve a raise!
Very messy. Maybe it needs to be published in Emily Post’s etiquette book that people who cheat on you should not expect an invitation to your wedding.
Stories like this make me agree with you. Certain etiquette things, I can see if people don’t already know. Like “don’t wear red to a wedding bc it can mean you disagree with the marraige and/or slept with the groom. I’ve NEVER heard that before. But the amount of people who wear white???? A CRAZY amount that gobsmacked me
Which, I know, that’s unrelated, but I feel like it should be obvious to it wear white, much like how it should be obvious that if you mess around with your brother and his fiancée emotionally, don’t expect an invite to the wedding.
So, here is a hot take from my family… Obviously, this was a long time ago, but when my mom decided to marry my dad, my mom‘s parents did not agree with this decision because my dad was Catholic. My grandparents were… Different! My grandma wanted to come to the wedding of their ONLY CHILD, but my grandfather did not, and like the person in this story, my grandmother relented, and stayed home with my grandfather. My mom and dad had a beautiful wedding and 55 years of a happy marriage with two children including me. (They are now deceased.) My grandma would say that it was the single greatest mistake of her entire life to miss her child’s wedding. When I told her that I was having a wedding in an unusual place, she said that she didn’t care if it was on the moon, she was going to my wedding! That father in the story will, in time, very much regret not having gone.
It's so cool to hear that your grandmother learned from her mistake and changed from being a close minded mother to become an open minded grandmother. ❤
Let’s normalize going no contact w toxic family. “Family before everything” and “blood is thicker than water” and blah blah blah is so toxic in and of itself when you have suffered trauma at the hands of your family. If going NC makes you feel guilty, just remember that it’s part of their narcissistic abuse game. Chosen family are the ones we want around that support us. Put your energy and love into them and never look back.
Years ago I got into a physical altercation with my sister because her and her boyfriend at the time were using the n-word in regards to my husband who is a black man. It's been like 7 years and while my sister is no longer with that boyfriend she refuses to even acknowledge what she said and refuses to apologize. My mom still asks me to forgive her pretty frequently and I recently just told her to stop because I can't forgive someone who won't apologize. If there was no remorse, there can be no forgiveness. Same goes with "Arthur" and "Turk".
How do you accidentally boink someone, do you trip and fall into their ladybits. It sounds to me like Turk accidentally does a lot of things. Maybe he should get bodyguards to help him, so he doesn’t have so many accidents. Or, mommy could cut the apron strings and Turk could actually start adulting like a big boy.
He probably slipped on a banana peel and lost his clothes along with any morality and fell onto a coincidentally naked Jen and, under the influence of stupidity, accidentally blinked.
Yeah it was so telling how Narcissistic he is and how he absolutely has no remorse nor can take an accountability, when he said him and Jen grew close and things just accidentally happened, instead of straight out admitting they both cheated. But then he had no problems saying she cheated when she did it with another guy and left him.
I didn’t talk to my sister for 7 years and I regret that time lost. Her transgression was borrowing $10,000 from my husband so she wouldn’t lose her house and not paying it back when she said, so I blew up and accused her of using him. In turn she said some awful awful things in a letter and that was that.
Reminds me of Shania Twain. Her best friend & her husband were cheating behind her back & they left everyone for each other. She connected with her best friend’s ex over the years & they ended up falling in love. They’re now happily married ❤
In other words "Cheater got cheated so tries to cheat again but now mom and dad cant go to the wedding cuz he cheated" 🤣the audacity of these people, NASTY
Sounds like Turk only wants what his brother has. Wanted first girlfriend, so pursued her and got her. As soon as he finds outs brother is with ex, now ex is all he wants. If he had come to the wedding, whadda you wanna bet he would have tried to get ex to leave his brother and run away with him. Thats some messed up family that he won't miss.
As I age, I find my favorite family members to be people I pick to be in my life, not just those who happen to be an in-law or blood related. I'm blessed with amazing parents and siblings. Several aunts, uncles, and cousins are a constant support too. A few other aunts, uncles, and cousins I haven't spoken to in years. Oh well. We have amazing friends that are like family to fill in the gaps.
Bride respected herself and her groom. The groom respected his bride and himself so they both didn't allow entitled narcs at the wedding, best way to do it.
I love how mom’s screaming forgive, forgive before there has even been an acknowledgment that what Turk did was WRONG! Let’s start there, SHALL WE!! Then maybe we can move on later to the FORGIVENESS part! Sheesh! Always getting the cart before the horse!
11:00 forgiving someone does NOT mean to act as if nothing ever happened and does NOT mean to be buddy-buddy with them again. i hate how ppl expect exactly this all the time.
I had a sister that was a total whore. She even hooked up with a boyfriend of mine. My parents just sat there and did nothing. She pretty much died with me hating her for all the things she did to me in my life. Lots of people have "Turks" as siblings.
Give her consequences the first time she misbehaved and didn't respect her siblings boundaries. You don suddenly decide that you have a right to sleep with your sisters boyfriend- you have been taught throughout your life time that the only thing that matter s is yourself.@@user-oy3yo7qe6o
I have a sister-in-law who, while not quite a total whore, generally makes sure if she starts planning a divorce that she already has a boyfriend who will marry her after divorce. She's been married 4 times.... only the last time her husband divorced her first.... so now she's looking for her 5th husband.
“We’re family” “Be the bigger person” “Find it in your heart” Whenever these words are spoken, the target will be manipulated, taken advantage of, guilt-tripped…😡
Parents and brother dont deserve to be there on that HAPPY day. Parents should have CARED enough to say " WHAT HAPPEN THAT YOU DONT WANT YOU BROTHER AT YOUR WEDDING???"
How can Turk not know his brother is in a long committed relationship with Maria? I am sure mom would have told him. I highly doubt he did not know they were a thing when he called her. And I hate when I hear guys say I realized the girl I cheated on treated me way better so I wanted her back (well hate when girls do that too with guys they cheated on too) and if the brother can go 4 years with no contact with his brother and be fine then why does he suddenly feel the "but we are family" excuse for feeling like he deserves to be invited? And they always say never invite your ex to a wedding so sadly he doesn't deserve to be invited for that reason alone.
"Never invite your ex to the wedding" depends entirely on the situation... If you and the ex separate because "We weren't into each other that much"... and still remain friends... why can't you invite your friend to your wedding?
“Arthur” should text his mum and ask her if she’d forgive her sister (if she has one) if mum caught her sister and Arthur’s dad cheating together. Especially if Aunt “Herodias” never showed any remorse.
Every word that came out of Charlotte's mouth was everything I agree with. I mean the audacity of that brother to act the victim when he cheated on his gf with his brother's gf, and trying to come off innocent.... Damn
It's so funny that Turk was wondering if he was the a-hole for getting his parents uninvited to his brothers wedding, but not if he was the a-hole for cheating on his girlfriend or stealing his brothers girlfriend.
I’m a family man and one thing I’ve lived by is that you don’t turn your back on family. You don’t date the ex of your family members. I would never date my brother’s ex because of the history and the complications that will cause. Also, I wouldn’t do it because that to me is disrespectful to whoever your family member is, especially if if they had a nasty breakup.
I've only ever heard of one love square working, and that's because everyone used honest communication and empathy with each other. 2 brothers were dating 2 best friends (sister by another mister feelz; grew up as neighbors and besties), and the besties were chatting over lunch one day and talking about their relationships. It was good, but not great? And they both had gripes? And one of them joked "Other Brother sounds so sweet; maybe we should just swap!" She was kidding, but they all talked about it (turns out the guys had been feeling similarly? Like, it's good but not great, how can we make things better?), and the four agreed to give it a trial run, with lots of open and honest communication. *_It freaking worked._* Turns out, each girl was just dating the wrong brother; they were pretty compatible but not perfectly so. Now that they found the _right_ brother, they're all happier than ever in the swap, kept the arrangement going, and now both couples are each happily married with kids. The babies were born less than 4 months apart, and are so close (both couples live very close to each other, so they have TONS of playdates, and babysit for each other all the time) they're more like siblings instead of cousins, and thick as thieves.
I'd bet anything the only reason Turk wanted to be invited was to try to cause issues at the wedding, and who knows if the mom knew he wanted maria back she might have caused problems too. I hate people like this family so much! I grew up with a cousin like Turk. I'm glad Op (forgot his name) is happy and I hope he stays away from his family forever.
Hi Charlotte My wife and I will be celebrating our 18th wedding anniversary this January....It would be nice if you could greet her online Her name is Ronalyn...she watches your video everyday, she's a fan.
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
I'm calling it, Turk wanted the invite so he could do the I OBJECT at the wedding, which would magically make Maria realize she loved him, the great Turk, all along.
Bruh, that is EXACTLY what he wanted.
Omg yes!!!
🤯🤯🤯🤯 YOOOOOOO YOU PROBABLY RIGHT
WTF???? To be honest he sounds like the type!!😮😮😮😮😮😢😢😢😢😢
I was thinking the same thing.
maria was also cheated on by the brother, why would she want him there on her day, no regard for her from the parents.
💯
Of course the parents have no regard for her - she's not Turk. He's the only one mommy gives a damn about, and everybody knows it.
Yeeeesssss
With her best friend no less, she shouldn't be reminded of that on her big day.
Totally agree
Turk caused his own mess, but I will have to argue it's not his fault that his parents got uninvited from the wedding. Partially, yes, but for the most part, it's the parent's own fault for being enabling, narrow-minded idiots playing favoritism between their two kids and picking the one that played stupid games to win stupid prizes. At least we know where Turk gets it from XD
Fact 💯 agree
He's the asshole for a long list of other reasons, but not for the specific thing he's asking about.
Thanks for taking my messy thoughts and writing them in a way that makes sense! xd
100% plus extra because the situation was explained to the parents before, and they still tried to play the 'because I'm the parent the truth doesn't matter just do what I want' card. Let them all stay home.
Agree
I love that we're now recognizing that we don't have to forgive someone because "they're family".
Exactly. People who use that argument forget that sociopaths, psychopaths, serial killers, and other wastes of skin are all part of someone's family.
Fuck that shit .. I be even more mad cuz you should no better .. u expect fuckery from the outside but not in ur own home ..
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
When I finally got fed up and cut contact with my half sister, I told my mom, "She's not my sister anymore, she's just some woman you gave birth to." and my mom said that was fair. I didn't make my mom choose sides, and my mom would give me a head's up in advance when Toxic planned to come to town so that I could avoid my parents' house.
Like, I knew my mom still loved my half sister, because that was her kid. But I wasn't gonna forgive Toxic since she never showed any remorse for the crap she pulled, and my mom never tried to push me to do that, because that rift was between Toxic and me, not me and my mom or her and my mom.
You definitely never forgive someone that never apologized.
"mine and Jen's personalities matched the best"
"Maria treated me better than Jen ever did"
this guy is a psycho 😆
Yes, both of you are Narcissists, of course your personalities will match best. :D
He likes himself and need someone that loves him and make him the center of the world
Or immature. Or both
Or he just likes what his brother has, of what we've seen it seems the other brother was good with Jen so turk was jealous so he snatched her, when she revealed being no good and his ex was with his brother now and happy then he decided he wants his brother's happiness, I think he just looks at what his brother has because maria was there from the beginning and he chose to let her go
I guess their personalities aligned better because they both don't treat their partners very well and are both cheaters and betrayers of supposed loved ones
My mum always says “the best revenge on the woman that steals your husband is to let her keep him”
And she's not wrong!
I should have told my ex-girlfriend when she threatened that other guys were trying to steal her from me, "If you are that easily stolen from me, they can have you!"
When a side chick gets the man, he becomes her problem now 😂😂 a cheating man is NOT a prize. It's only a matter of time before he does her dirty as well.. 🤷♀️
Truth! my ex-husband truly found his vile viper match!
@@genevieveaniko6492 There's an 80's movie called She Devil about this very concept.
@@genevieveaniko6492I recently heard this phrase “she stole my problem, not my man” and it’s so accurate 😂
It’s always wild to me when someone does the “I don’t understand why my family member is shutting me out” when they’ve behaved in a wretched way. I am so so tired of the “you have to forgive because we’re family.” No. No, I don’t. Just because we’re related by some measure or another doesn’t mean I have to be disrespectful to myself as a person to accommodate you and your comfort. Respect and consideration goes both ways, regardless of “family bonds.”
And I say this as someone with a very wonderful and loving family. I would do anything for my family, but if they burn that bridge, we’re done.
Forgiveness is for the forgiver, not the forgiven, they may never even know they’ve been forgiven. We can forgive others as God commands us to do, regardless of their relation to us and still cut association with them. The two are not the same, so forgiving others is a must to moving on happily with our lives, IMHO. You can still refuse to associate with them. 🙂
@@GaellisDarling depending on the infraction, this is not always achievable. My bio brother sa'ed my daughter. ZERO forgiveness here!
This is why it’s possible to divorce from your family and change your name. People have done it throughout history. It’s not even close to new. It’s such a toxic mind trick to try and manipulate them into letting you constantly abuse them. Break the cycle, end the abuse.
I absolutely HATE the "but it's family" argument.
Over the summer my aunt (mom's 2nd eldest sister) was in hospital on her deathbed & wanted to drive up to see her. But my other aunt (mom's eldest sister) barred her from going. Yelling at my mom saying "she fine. Don't go visit her" Meanwhile her & my uncle (mom's brother) secretly got a fight the next day to see my aunt. Aunt died the day after they visited. This pissed me off beyond belief because it's not the first time they did this (they did the exact same thing when my grandma (mom's mom) died.
I refused to go back home to the "celebration of life" ceremony. Got a text from my brother demanding I go because "it's FaMiLy" I didn't budge.
While my mom was up there she wound up having a mild heart attack. Her only vistors were my dad, brother, my uncle & his wife. When they got back home my mom texted her sister saying she was in the hospital. Aunt texts back "oh yea, I know" 😠 No "How are you feeling? Are you doing okay?" Nothing.
I have cut off a majority of my mom's side because they're all terrible people.
My mom still talks to everyone (she's a people pleaser) She sent out a group chat wishing everyone a happy Thanksgiving only to be met with an incoming text that she has been blocked by one member of the family. That person is my aunts husband. No clue as to why he blocked her. And she only got a response from two people. One of my 5 cousins & my one cousins wife. To say my mom was heartbroken is an understatement.
Family is not blood. It's the people who are there for you in good times & bad.
@@ladyliberty5771 that’s on your daughter to forgive. Not you. And as far as I’m concerned, he doesn’t really deserve it after something like that. But coming to terms with abuse and seeking therapy really does help you forgive. From one victim to another. You survive despite them. Not in spite of them. 💋🌈❤️ much love bestie. That’s rough. Stay strong momma.
This REEKS of narcissism! On the parts of the parents AND the cheating brother. 4 years no contact ... I wouldn't invite him either!
100% agree with you-- SOMEONE is clearly the golden child and the other, the scapegoat.
100%!!
This is exactly what narcissists do when they lose control. Guilt, shame, tantrums, etc…. They will do whatever they need to get under the skin of the person and cause enough harm to get them crawling back
This!
Yep! Turk is the golden child 😒
Let’s not forget Maria. Even if “Arthur” would give up and consider inviting his brother, Maria would not be pleased to have Turk at her wedding. It’s not a good idea to ignore your future wife’s feelings.
Neither is it to keep exes in your lie, even if it’s the husband’s brother 😬 just overall poopy situation
Yep. That'd be telling her that hed ignore his loving wife for someone that has proven time and time again he doesn't really love him.
I bet Maria is proud of Arthur for taking such a strong stance against his family on such a big day. Not everybody does.
I find it interesting that Turk hasn’t spoken to his brother in four years, but suddenly wants to be buddies again now that he’s found out Arthur’s dating/marrying Maria. Especially considering he said it devastated him because he wanted to reconnect with her. Arthur’s no fool and isn’t giving his problematic brother the opportunity to cause problems in his relationship again. I hope the happy couple continues to live in bliss, without all the family drama. ❤
even if the whole cheating drama didn't happen it still weird to expect a wedding invite after 4 years of NC!
Damn. Sounds like Turk has never acted like a brother, so where’s the loss? I feel like the victims here deserve all of the peace.
Something tells me if douche brother got invited to the wedding, he would have made some over the top scene and spectacle of himself. He was fine kicking Maria and his brother to the curb to get what he wanted, so who's to say he wouldn't muck up his brother's wedding in an attempt to get back what he wanted? In this case, Maria.
You're not the first person to say this. And I thought this as well
I feel like parents might have been in on it too, why else would they push for him to get the invite, I feel most people still having feelings for their ex would not want to come to the exes wedding unless they had some delusions they could win them back
@@mirayzie, maybe. I think it’s more likely they didn’t want to answer “where’s Turk?” questions
@@mirayzieI think so too
It’s not often these cheating stories where family is involved and the injured party is the one who is bullied to forgive and forget has a great ending! This one did! Kept firm with the boundaries, didn’t respond to the BS, the wedding and honeymoon didn’t get disrupted by disrespectful family… just awesome. Wishing this couple all the best! 🎉❤
i see you in most charlotte videos bc i'm lurking in most vids and when i see you i'm just like, "heyyy, its you" lol
Soooo it’s safe to say that the coupling of Turk and Jen is collectively “Jurk” 😊
Ha!
why not Jerk? that's better
I thought it meant "Turd" lmao. Didn't think of that, good job
@@OneFourtyFour-c3vI don't get it
See what you did there🤣🤣🤣
Son-husbands are a thing. My sister married one and he always chose his toxic mother over her. She ended up divorcing him. His sister is also dysfunctional from being infantilized by the mother. Always consider the effect of your in-laws and choose wisely.
The more AITA posts I see, the more I’m realizing toxic men are derived from toxic mothers… the number of mothers who protect the bad behavior of their sons is astounding
Omg I was thinking about this the other day! It is a cycle.
It's the boy moms honestly. But sometimes it's the garbage dad's too. Andrew Tate's dad for example was the worst. His mom and sister on the other hand want him in jail.
Mental conditions like this runs genetically in some family lines regardless of gender. In this case, it seems to be from the mother's side of the family.
His mom too? Give some references @@RandomSwiftie13
Look up the 'devouring mother'.
Girl, I am so glad that I found you and your reactions. This legit helps me to raise my two boys to not be brats. To remember that if one does something wrong, they have to apologize to the other. They are still young enough to learn not to be an a55 to each other. Also helps to remind me not to favor one over the other. I have a 11 year old and a 9 year old currently. My husband and I are doing our best to raise them to not be jerks to each other, like the brothers in this story.
I'm so glad!
Thank you Charlotte for your Public Service!!! ❤😂
I can tell you, as a former teacher, it is not the parents who are self aware enough to worry that they might raise jerks who have crotch goblins but the ones who are delulu enough to think they are doing everything right. My colleague (who is still in 😮) and I used to say during every parent teacher conference that within 10 s of meeting the parent, we could tell why their kid was who they were. Always blamed the adults and not the kids though. It’s the Dunning Kruger effect viewed through parenting.
Saying "we're family" for forgiveness doesn't negate (or gives a free pass, get out-of-jail-free care) the actions that you've done. In fact, it should be the very last person that you could do this to.
Exactly! "We're family" wasn't shit to you when you wronged me so why should it mean anything to me with your wanting forgiveness??
Indeed. Forgiveness isn’t a free pass to hurt people and keep hurting people, especially family and friends.
Lounging in my Stay Petty merch with a cup of cocoa by the fire and Charlotte on the tv is the best way to start the day ❤
STAY PETTY BABE
Sounds like the LIFE!!! ❤ I absolutely love this for you bestie!! ❤
✨☕️✨That’s what I’m talking about! A cup of happy and Charlotte! I love your choices!
YESSS! !
💯 agree ❤
When I learned family ties aren't a license to abuse, I walked away and I became happier.
A good parent should NEVER have favorites...and if one does happen to have a favorite, a good parent will NEVER let you be able to tell which one it is.
A heartfelt thank you to all the GOOD parents out there. Y'all deserve the best!
Exactly.
Another reason why they should hide which is favorite is because statistically the favorite will betray/abandon the parents later on in life....and since having favorites could chase away the only ones who would have been willing to help.....that's another reason not to have favorites.
For years I would occasionally mention I knew my baby sister was the favourite but whatevs. My mother insisted she didn’t have a favourite. She loved us equally.
First Christmas I spent with the whole family, after my mum got married, and my new adult step-siblings my new stepsister asked my mum who her favourite kid was because SHE was her dad’s favourite. Again, my mum said the same thing. My stepsister said, “Naw. It’s (baby sister). You can tell.”
🤣
The sad thing is that while they brought up the “but we’re family” argument, no body even thought about how terrible it would be for Maria to have her cheating ex at her wedding. Like even if Turk and the parents don’t care about op, the audacity of disrespecting the bride like that is absurd
I think we are all here because we are on your side. I agree, the dad needs a backbone.
Seriously, whenever I hear or read a cheater say they had "a moment of weakness", it makes me want to throw up a little. Someone who loves and is loyal to their partner doesn't make a "mistake" nor has "a moment of weakness" in the first place. People don't "trip" into each other by mistake. lol
Also, a moment of weaknesses that lasted a week! They cheated at the party (I wonder why they went to that party without their partners) and they cheated again a week later.
@@viviannehoffmann6005 Yeah, very true
Exactly, you don't "accidently" f*ck someone, especially not you BROTHERS GIRLFRIEND! I apologize for my language, I'm just saying how it is.
Yea, like "Turk" sugar-coated HIM cheating on HIS BROTHER and GIRLFRIEND with her BEST FRIEND but when HE got cheated ON he didn't sugar coat it. It's pure narcissistic behaviour and he tried it to do it AGAIN
I feel for OP. My mother did the same thing for my half sister. Always saying, “she my daughter”, as a means to say she could do no wrong. Even after I would say, “I’m your daughter too”, she would still take her side. When the half sister died, my mother begged me to go to her funeral, I said, “No she was a monster to me”, she would get mad that I wouldn’t go. I just didn’t care, and stood my ground, no matter how many times she begged. With my brother being the middle child, and I’m the baby, you would think that I was spoiled, no I am the forgotten one. My brother will ask for anything and both my parents will drop whatever it is they are doing to go help. My brother will keep them out for hours to watch his kids, (parents are too old don’t need to be staying out past 12am with no update on when they are going home). I’ve confronted my parents, but they blew me off. I’ve confronted my brother about making our parents stay out too late (sometimes mom complains she is out past 8 and just wants to come home), he says he’ll do better, only to go back to his ways. I will try to help my mom, even if I don’t exist to her sometimes, tell them I need them to come home, they still take a couple of hours to get home, but if it was my brother they would be right there. I will still help my parents even if I am forgotten by them.
I'm so sorry you are in this situation. Just do the best that you can, and when they need you, be there for them you sound like a very good person
I’m sorry you have been treated like that. I wish you the absolute best in life
You deserve better... You should go very low or no contact for a while and see if you feel better. I think you will. Also, if you aren't in therapy already I highly suggest it as it works wonders, especially in situations like this. I am just talking from experience, as I was in a very similar situation but I am the oldest. My brother is just under two years younger than me and was always the favorite, could do no wrong, and constantly manipulated my mother growing up and still does. Then my half sister was born when I was 15, and the only use I had was helping take care of her, otherwise I was pretty much ignored and neglected. I now have very limited contact with my family, and live a state away so I only see and talk to them on my terms. It has been such a huge weight off my shoulders.
why are u putting yourself in the position to be a doormat for your parents who seem like they don't care a whit about u? this is self sabotaging and self hurt. u are allowing them to walk all over u and so nothing will change because u are allowing this behaviour. I am the baby too have brother and sister. and other than my mom who was wonderful and died at 17 i was treated like trash by them and father. i walked away over 20 yrs ago and my life was so much better. NEVER let someone use u for a door mat no matter how much u love them parents included. they don't love u when they are behaving like this. like u said u don't exist for them except as someone they can use. grow a backbone and walk away at least no contact for a while to see if they realize and change their behaviour. if they don't then don't look back keep walking. as long as u remain u will be forgotten and used and no one deserves a life of that. good luck.
Never have I seen a post that so perfectly encapsulated the maxim, "there are 3 sides to every story: your side, their side, and the truth."
Holy cannoli cream.
“Holy cannoli cream” 👍
OMG I am so excited! I heard Turk's delusional side and was dying to get the full picture from his brother. The parents are even worse than I thought. I think the full picture was clear to the parents without needing a more detailed explanation because the "full picture" was evidenced by THEIR SON DATING HIS BROTHER'S EX-GIRLFRIEND IMMEDIATELY AFTER THEY BROKE UP! If that isn't evidence enough of what happened for the parents, they're just dumb or pretending to be.
Four years later and crotch goblin is whining how hurt he is that the ex he cheated on is getting married. There's something wrong with that boy.
That boy ain't right...
Crotch goblin 😂😂
I absolutely LOVE drama that isn’t mine.
But I feel bad for OP. I’m glad he had a great wedding though!
I dunno, OP got the girl, had a great wedding and cut off contact with the toxic people in his life. Sounds like he's doing alright to me
I had a similar issue. Was dating a guy for a few months when he started getting weird and distant. I went to my sister to cry on her shoulder and get her advice on our "relationship". To make matters worse - wait for it.... I worked with this guy. Different buildings in a large organization but our paths would cross professionally semi-regularly - which is how we met. One day at work - he mentioned that he was having trouble getting a hold of my sister and wanted to "thank her for the DINNER she made him last night" - Needless to say - I lost my S#ht but remained professional at the office. I confronted my sister and she claimed she did nothing wrong and went on seeing him. I ended up leaving my job and cutting my sister off for a little over 5 years. When I got married - I didn't want the back stabber at the wedding. So much family drama and people took sides. In the end - I had to hire security to keep her out of the wedding. Because we got married at a pretty posh hotel and booked a suite of rooms for out of town guests - I found out later that my brother snuck her into his room. (Why would she even wanted to come knowing I didn't want her there). My wedding photos were a mess - most photos of me were NOT smiling but scanning the room for the backstabber. 24 years latter - we are civil but don't talk about him at all.
your brother is a a hole for sneaking her into his room and helping her ruin your special day. he knew u hired security what a waste of money. i'd be blasting his ass too he knew she wasn't allowed there nor was she wanted so he's just a bad as her. i'd be no contact with them both just like i am my own because they treat me like garbage. i will not subject myself to that crap just because they are family.
Why should family automatically get a free pass for wrongdoings? Just because we're related doesn't mean it's ok for you to treat "family" so horribly, but then play on familial obligation to guilt them into forgiving you. Guess that one brother knows which one is the favorite, so let them have each other to pet each other's egos and blame the world for not coddling to their every whim. 🤢🤮
The short answer is family does *_not_* automatically get a free pass for wrongdoings!
What we're really dealing with in this scenario is narcissism, and Golden child syndrome
If anything, certain wrongdoings should be even worse than doing the same thing to strangers, since one's supposed to LOVE their family. I mean, if that's the disrespect certain people give to their loved ones, what can they do to people they don't care about?
@@ValeriyApocalypse Right? That's what I mean, if you can be that hurtful to those you supposedly love, how far will you go with strangers?
"He's your brother! Forgive him!" But that didn't matter when "Turk" was f*ing his brother's girlfriend, now did it? So why does it matter now?
We all have that one family member that can "do no wrong" and it is so unrealistic and frustrating.
Look forward to you every queen Charlotte!!!!!
Smartest decision by OP. Why do I have the feeling that if they were all invited to the wedding, that the mother would object and the brother would storm the altar and try to propose to his ex-girlfriend/bride during the ceremony?
Let's just be glad Turk didn't try to crash the wedding either way
Forgiveness, isn’t actually for the one who did the wrong. Forgiveness funny enough, is for yourself. You can forgive someone for cheating on you, but just doesn’t mean you have to let them back in your life. I forgave my mean nasty grandmother for making me the scapegoat, but I didn’t try to maintain a relationship.
Absolutely 💯. You can forgive someone and not let them stay in your life.
Everyone demands forgiveness from people. No one has to forgive and it is also not necessary. You can just make peace with yourself, close the chapter and continue to have a way happier life without these people who wronged you. No need to forgive and forget everything that happened, this just helps the offender by continuing their behavior. I don´t forgive (if there is no real realization about wrongdoings or regret of the offender) and this keeps me far away from abusive folks and have a happy life.
@@insideAdirtyMind forgive or you will not be forgiven. It’s not about them acknowledging their mistakes, not everyone can do that. Why hold onto the hot coal expecting the other person to get burnt
@@insideAdirtyMindIF the Lord doesn’t forgive you, what will you do then? I can guarantee you won’t have a happy life. You have to forgive (NOT forget) so all the negativity can leave you and then you become a person filled with light and love ❤️ God Bless you, child and know He loves you with all His heart 💜!
The brother, the gift that keeps on giving.
No, the gift that keeps on taking 😅.
“Relatives are the people who are blood. Family are the people you choose”
Oh I so can't wait until OP has kids (if they decide to)!! The mom will be grovelling in every way she can think of to get into her grandkids lives. I hope OP stands firm.
My entire family loves you, Charlotte! My 8yo answered your question (re: whose side are you on?) with "I'm just always on Charlotte's side." He adores you.
Sometimes when there are children that act very entitled, it's because the parents spoiled them and encouraged their nasty behavior. I wouldn't be surprised if they parents were fully aware of everything this brother did.
I couldn't be more THRILLED that the JERK of a brother was "broken hearted" when he tried to weasel his way back into Maria's life, and UPSET when he learned she was marrying his brother. I'm GLAD Jen cheated on him. Now, I hope EVERYONE cheats on Jen. She deserves it, BIG TIME. It's amazing how all of the sudden "they are family" when he wants an invite. They certainly WERENT "family" when he was sticking it to Jen while she was with his brother. ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING. I wouldn't have him OR your horrible parents at my wedding either. Good for the brother for putting his foot down.
11:26 "Sorrows, sorrows, prayers, prayers" Love how judge Charlotte is quoting queen Charlotte 😂😂😂
“These are the consequences of your actions”. In Charlotte’s sing-song voice. And the parents too… supporting the one brother who needs to take an accountability for what he did. Justified in his mind? Maybe, but still morally and plain wrong.
"Sorrows, sorrows. Prayers, prayers"....Kween Charlotte quoting Queen Charlotte (from the Netflix series Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story) is so meta I may p00p!
Charlotte i'm so proud of you. You had an amazing evolution in this Channel and at the same time, you stay true to yourself. Your adorable personality is why so many like me love this Channel and the team that work with you have the same dedication and good vibes. This Channel is so special and thank you for that. I wish you the best. ♥️
She’s like an amazing butterfly that just keeps getting more and more dazzling and radiant. ❤
@@erikarussell1142 so true. ♥️
💯 agree ❤
@@BrianAndresScott 🤗
Thank you Dina I appreciate you so much!
My brother and I had a uwritten rule, ”don’t date (hook up with) your brothers ex.” This worked for us, although it would have been weird to break the rule as we are twins. *shiver*
Although me and my brother would never fall for the same person (we're both straight), we still had the "my friends are off limit" rule.
There are things your friends know that family shouldn't know, and things the family knows that friends shouldn't know.
My husband is having a similar family drama in regards to his parents expecting him (the victim) to forgive his sister for her atrocious behaviour though she hasn’t apologised and actually doesn’t even acknowledge that she has done anything wrong. She turned his whole family against him, made my baby shower really awkward because everyone was talking about how she wasn’t invited and was “SO UPSET” (but she clearly didn’t care about our baby when she actively blocked my husband getting to the hospital when I was rushed in with complications with the pregnancy after already experiencing a loss previously), and she has been making things hard for his parents when they want to come and see the baby. My husband has broken contact with them twice in 6 months over this and his sister still seems to think she did no wrong and they keep pandering to her. FAMILIES MAN! 😂
Gotta be so careful with these AITAH cause you really don’t know if they’re telling the truth. So glad we got both sides. My ex SIL posted stuff on Reddit to justify the gaslighting she did to my sibling. You just never know what people are leaving out or minimizing in these anonymous posts.
I went through a similar situation in my marriage. The difference being that it didn't involve family, but instead friends, and we were married. My ex husband and I were married and his friend Noah was married to Ashley. They were our "married friends" because we were all newly married (for about a year and a half) and my ex, Evan decided his "personality" matched Ashley's more than Noah's did and they both had affairs between my and Noah's backs. Literally didn't know "personality" matches was a real excuse people made until this video, it's the same excuse my ex used when I caught him. Now he and Ashley are together, I think they make a great couple, since they're both cheaters and I hope Ashley cheats on him and she takes all his money 😘
Edit: For even more context, Evan and I were together for 10 years: dated for 6, engaged for 2 1/2, and married for 1 1/2. Of course I found out later he had cheated on me with my best friend, who stopped talking to me years ago, and also with my next door neighbor. Ashley used to be my friend, I went to her about all the problems in my marriage and she seemed to always have my back. Be careful who you share your life with.
Oh if he cheated on you that many times, than he definitely has already cheated on her. Someone like that doesn't just stop doing things like that because they have married someone else. It has nothing to do with the person they are with at the time, and everything to do with how insecure and selfish they are. Because they most likely just aren't the type that can be Monogamous. But because they are so insecure and selfish they could never handle being in a healthy open relationship where the person is able to be with other people as well, so they cheat. These type of people should not be in relationships at all, let alone be married, but that is what makes them even more selfish and Narcissistic. Because they don't want to be alone, want someone to take care of them, and want to have all the benefits of a loving and caring relationship, without ever actually putting in the real work to deserve that from anyone.
@@jeanams07 Thank you. You explained it perfectly and you're absolutely right. He was a very insecure man from the start, but he insisted he was just misunderstood and me being naive as I was, believed him. When I moved in with him, after he asked me to marry him, everything changed. He accused me of cheating on him numerous times because I was out grocery shopping and I have ADHD so... I was in the candle section when I should've been getting paper plates. Girl, the gaslighting I've been through in those years was horrendous. But because of Charlotte and her channel I now know that if guys start accusing out of nowhere like that, it usually means THEY'RE the ones who are cheating and they're projecting. This channel has really helped me a lot.
People who are so insecure and have such fragile egos (read narcissists in the psychological context) that they must blame everyone but themselves for the consequences of their actions, often follow the same scripts because they are all trying to do the same thing, absolve themselves of guilt and responsibility. They literally cannot handle feeling 💩emotions and will “convert” it to anger at you and the world, especially if they think it impacts how the world at large sees them. So “I couldn’t exercise will power and wanted to feel better about myself and so I did something that broke a promise and hurt you” becomes “they were a better ‘fit’ and you weren’t enough”. Red flags for me are constant complaints where nothing you offer can resolve it because they want your attention, not the solution, and over the top emotional responses that are disproportionate.
It is a special kind of even not only to cheat but also to have as a pool from which he picked out his cheating partners your friends and/or neighbours.
Every time you said "I'm sorry." I out loud said, "No you're not, we're all thinking it!"
Love this, I’m glad we got to see both sides and it clearly shows that “Turk” is 100% in the wrong and “Arthur” seems like a great guy who got screwed over by his ex, his brother and his mom. I’m so glad he found happiness and is now married and able to move on from his toxic family.
Your editor is the best! IT Crowd is one of my favorite shows 💕
Never the victim, just an instigator like what did he expect to happen. And then the audacity to try again wtf man, you need help. Be happy for your brother and stop trying to take what's his. And Maria seems like a genuine lady and that's what Arthur needs. So Congrats and hopefully your family will realize that they are shitty. Much love and happiness to the couple. And love getting your notifications in the morning and can't wait to open them and watch videos.
Love the cameos by Turk from scrubs and the boss talking to Jen from IT Crowd.
That family counter was a nice touch. Lmao 🤣
Charlotte's Editor.. you are firing on all cylinders here! absolutely awesome inserts, clips, and memes. My god I couldn't care less for anything else, but your inserts make these videos actually worth watching! You deserve a raise!
Very messy. Maybe it needs to be published in Emily Post’s etiquette book that people who cheat on you should not expect an invitation to your wedding.
Stories like this make me agree with you. Certain etiquette things, I can see if people don’t already know. Like “don’t wear red to a wedding bc it can mean you disagree with the marraige and/or slept with the groom. I’ve NEVER heard that before. But the amount of people who wear white???? A CRAZY amount that gobsmacked me
Which, I know, that’s unrelated, but I feel like it should be obvious to it wear white, much like how it should be obvious that if you mess around with your brother and his fiancée emotionally, don’t expect an invite to the wedding.
So, here is a hot take from my family… Obviously, this was a long time ago, but when my mom decided to marry my dad, my mom‘s parents did not agree with this decision because my dad was Catholic. My grandparents were… Different! My grandma wanted to come to the wedding of their ONLY CHILD, but my grandfather did not, and like the person in this story, my grandmother relented, and stayed home with my grandfather. My mom and dad had a beautiful wedding and 55 years of a happy marriage with two children including me. (They are now deceased.) My grandma would say that it was the single greatest mistake of her entire life to miss her child’s wedding. When I told her that I was having a wedding in an unusual place, she said that she didn’t care if it was on the moon, she was going to my wedding! That father in the story will, in time, very much regret not having gone.
It's so cool to hear that your grandmother learned from her mistake and changed from being a close minded mother to become an open minded grandmother. ❤
Let’s normalize going no contact w toxic family. “Family before everything” and “blood is thicker than water” and blah blah blah is so toxic in and of itself when you have suffered trauma at the hands of your family. If going NC makes you feel guilty, just remember that it’s part of their narcissistic abuse game. Chosen family are the ones we want around that support us. Put your energy and love into them and never look back.
Years ago I got into a physical altercation with my sister because her and her boyfriend at the time were using the n-word in regards to my husband who is a black man. It's been like 7 years and while my sister is no longer with that boyfriend she refuses to even acknowledge what she said and refuses to apologize. My mom still asks me to forgive her pretty frequently and I recently just told her to stop because I can't forgive someone who won't apologize. If there was no remorse, there can be no forgiveness. Same goes with "Arthur" and "Turk".
How do you accidentally boink someone, do you trip and fall into their ladybits. It sounds to me like Turk accidentally does a lot of things. Maybe he should get bodyguards to help him, so he doesn’t have so many accidents. Or, mommy could cut the apron strings and Turk could actually start adulting like a big boy.
He probably slipped on a banana peel and lost his clothes along with any morality and fell onto a coincidentally naked Jen and, under the influence of stupidity, accidentally blinked.
Yeah it was so telling how Narcissistic he is and how he absolutely has no remorse nor can take an accountability, when he said him and Jen grew close and things just accidentally happened, instead of straight out admitting they both cheated. But then he had no problems saying she cheated when she did it with another guy and left him.
he should get nursing staff to help him in his everyday life, so he don´t accidently hurts himself or others, the poor baby
@@insideAdirtyMind
He’d have to make sure they were male nurses, because he might accidentally do something naughty with them too. lol
@deborahdicesare9042 or they might accidentally do something naughty to him 🤷♂️😏
"I had a moment of weakness for about a week" 😂🤣
7:26 awwww Turk is hurt??? awwww
it's videos like these that make me feel okay with not being close with my family
I didn’t talk to my sister for 7 years and I regret that time lost. Her transgression was borrowing $10,000 from my husband so she wouldn’t lose her house and not paying it back when she said, so I blew up and accused her of using him. In turn she said some awful awful things in a letter and that was that.
It's never too late to apologize, forgive and mend fences - If you truly regret the lost time.
Reminds me of Shania Twain. Her best friend & her husband were cheating behind her back & they left everyone for each other. She connected with her best friend’s ex over the years & they ended up falling in love. They’re now happily married ❤
I love that you include clips from IT Crowd. My favorite show
In other words "Cheater got cheated so tries to cheat again but now mom and dad cant go to the wedding cuz he cheated" 🤣the audacity of these people, NASTY
Always on YOUR side, Charlotte!
Sounds like Turk only wants what his brother has. Wanted first girlfriend, so pursued her and got her. As soon as he finds outs brother is with ex, now ex is all he wants. If he had come to the wedding, whadda you wanna bet he would have tried to get ex to leave his brother and run away with him. Thats some messed up family that he won't miss.
As I age, I find my favorite family members to be people I pick to be in my life, not just those who happen to be an in-law or blood related. I'm blessed with amazing parents and siblings. Several aunts, uncles, and cousins are a constant support too. A few other aunts, uncles, and cousins I haven't spoken to in years. Oh well. We have amazing friends that are like family to fill in the gaps.
Bro did bro a favor. He got what he deserved, and good brother was blessed with the good girl.
I like the "mix of color" in this studio, more than just the pink in the last. It's a nice space Char ❤
Always great when I see Charlotte has posted. You and your team are awesome Charlotte 🇦🇺💜🇮🇹
Bride respected herself and her groom. The groom respected his bride and himself so they both didn't allow entitled narcs at the wedding, best way to do it.
I look forward to every time you post girl! We’re like besties in my living room lolllz. Thanks for all of the laughs! ♥️
I love how mom’s screaming forgive, forgive before there has even been an acknowledgment that what Turk did was WRONG! Let’s start there, SHALL WE!! Then maybe we can move on later to the FORGIVENESS part! Sheesh! Always getting the cart before the horse!
Sudden Ryan George was the best part! My two favorite creators in one video. Woo!!
11:00 forgiving someone does NOT mean to act as if nothing ever happened and does NOT mean to be buddy-buddy with them again. i hate how ppl expect exactly this all the time.
I had a sister that was a total whore. She even hooked up with a boyfriend of mine. My parents just sat there and did nothing. She pretty much died with me hating her for all the things she did to me in my life. Lots of people have "Turks" as siblings.
That is awful. I’m sorry you had to experience that.
Give her consequences the first time she misbehaved and didn't respect her siblings boundaries.
You don suddenly decide that you have a right to sleep with your sisters boyfriend- you have been taught throughout your life time that the only thing that matter s is yourself.@@user-oy3yo7qe6o
I have a sister-in-law who, while not quite a total whore, generally makes sure if she starts planning a divorce that she already has a boyfriend who will marry her after divorce. She's been married 4 times.... only the last time her husband divorced her first.... so now she's looking for her 5th husband.
The Ryan George clip really sent me, nice job editor, that was very funny!
Sunday, breakfast in bed, and Charlotte. HOW AM I NOT EMBARRRRRRASSSSSSED?? Well, it's Charlotte 🤷♀️❤
The Ryan George jump-scare at the end made me chuckle. Thank you editor!
“We’re family”
“Be the bigger person”
“Find it in your heart”
Whenever these words are spoken, the target will be manipulated, taken advantage of, guilt-tripped…😡
Parents and brother dont deserve to be there on that HAPPY day. Parents should have CARED enough to say " WHAT HAPPEN THAT YOU DONT WANT YOU BROTHER AT YOUR WEDDING???"
How can Turk not know his brother is in a long committed relationship with Maria? I am sure mom would have told him. I highly doubt he did not know they were a thing when he called her. And I hate when I hear guys say I realized the girl I cheated on treated me way better so I wanted her back (well hate when girls do that too with guys they cheated on too) and if the brother can go 4 years with no contact with his brother and be fine then why does he suddenly feel the "but we are family" excuse for feeling like he deserves to be invited? And they always say never invite your ex to a wedding so sadly he doesn't deserve to be invited for that reason alone.
"Never invite your ex to the wedding" depends entirely on the situation... If you and the ex separate because "We weren't into each other that much"... and still remain friends... why can't you invite your friend to your wedding?
“Arthur” should text his mum and ask her if she’d forgive her sister (if she has one) if mum caught her sister and Arthur’s dad cheating together. Especially if Aunt “Herodias” never showed any remorse.
Every word that came out of Charlotte's mouth was everything I agree with. I mean the audacity of that brother to act the victim when he cheated on his gf with his brother's gf, and trying to come off innocent.... Damn
“When someone shows you who they ARE, believe them the first time” - MAYA ANGELOU-
YAY! My daily dose of Charlotte!!
It's so funny that Turk was wondering if he was the a-hole for getting his parents uninvited to his brothers wedding, but not if he was the a-hole for cheating on his girlfriend or stealing his brothers girlfriend.
I’m a family man and one thing I’ve lived by is that you don’t turn your back on family. You don’t date the ex of your family members. I would never date my brother’s ex because of the history and the complications that will cause. Also, I wouldn’t do it because that to me is disrespectful to whoever your family member is, especially if if they had a nasty breakup.
Yes! Respectable men are hide to find on the internet, aren’t they.
There are always exceptions when family members are abusive and toxic.
They already turned their back on you. Why not return the favor@@hadeskore
I've only ever heard of one love square working, and that's because everyone used honest communication and empathy with each other. 2 brothers were dating 2 best friends (sister by another mister feelz; grew up as neighbors and besties), and the besties were chatting over lunch one day and talking about their relationships. It was good, but not great? And they both had gripes? And one of them joked "Other Brother sounds so sweet; maybe we should just swap!" She was kidding, but they all talked about it (turns out the guys had been feeling similarly? Like, it's good but not great, how can we make things better?), and the four agreed to give it a trial run, with lots of open and honest communication.
*_It freaking worked._*
Turns out, each girl was just dating the wrong brother; they were pretty compatible but not perfectly so. Now that they found the _right_ brother, they're all happier than ever in the swap, kept the arrangement going, and now both couples are each happily married with kids. The babies were born less than 4 months apart, and are so close (both couples live very close to each other, so they have TONS of playdates, and babysit for each other all the time) they're more like siblings instead of cousins, and thick as thieves.
Arthur should be forever thankful to his brother for riding him off such horrible woman and allowing him to find true love
I took a drink of bubbly every time Charlotte said ‘Family,’ now I need to pop open another bottle. 🍾🥂
I love family drama that isn’t my family drama 🤣🤣🤣
If my parents defended my brother after all that, my response would be "sorry, my family died last month, I don't know any of you."
I'd bet anything the only reason Turk wanted to be invited was to try to cause issues at the wedding, and who knows if the mom knew he wanted maria back she might have caused problems too. I hate people like this family so much! I grew up with a cousin like Turk. I'm glad Op (forgot his name) is happy and I hope he stays away from his family forever.
Your judgement, honorable judge Charlotte is as ever, absolutely flawless ❤ Family is who you make it! ❤ Xx
Hi Charlotte My wife and I will be celebrating our 18th wedding anniversary this January....It would be nice if you could greet her online Her name is Ronalyn...she watches your video everyday, she's a fan.