13:06 - People actually passed out during Palaniuk's readings of Guts while he was on the book tour for Haunted. I've read it and it makes me feel ill just to think about it.
@@kellymoses8566 it is depressing but I always felt The Road was about what it looks like to maintain faith in the worst circumstances. The father is on his last legs trying to instill decency in the son and ultimately he is successful. The son carries on the hope for civilization however faint it is. On the other hand, Blood Meridian has no shred of lingering hope. We're all just going to get devoured by a giant, bald, naked, pale man who doesn't like it when you refuse to dance.
Tbh, yes. Marrying your rapist? Getting pregnant by your FIL and then he tries to honor kill you ? Approved and specific wholesale genocide ? Getting tricked and then raped by your halfbro? Murdering your best underling cuz you want his wife? Selling your little brother and telling your dad he was eaten by animals? Being tested by God that if you really love him you’ll kill your kids? A man offering his daughters to be raped instead of his guests? Then there’s all the crazy inventive ways to die. And injunctions against fucking animals or humans that don’t want it. Unless God says it’s okay. And then dont get me started on the crucifixion fixation.
Last Exit to Brooklyn is bleak without relief. I feel like if you read it during a rainy week in November it might just take you down with it. Have you read Earthlings by Sayaka Murata? It's super disturbing and trippy and a little Vonnegut-esque in my opinion.
Most of the "Disturbing Book" videos I've seen are just the same couple of books over and over again so good job on picking some ones I haven't heard of.
Mysterious Skin is incredibly powerful, I saw the film a few years ago and now am reading the book. He has so much empathy for these characters in a horrid situation which sadly a lot of us can relate to.
Just found your channel and immediatly subscribed. My disturbing read was 'Tender is the flesh'. The most disturbing thing is that I can actually believe that this could happen. Not for the faint of heart/stomach.
It's not exactly a shocking novel, but the controversy over French writer Romain Gary's "The Life Before Us" was basically the same as that over "Heart is Deceitful . . ." The author was very well known for his writing (and other achievements), but he wanted the novel to be read on its own, rather than as *his* product, so he published it under an Arab name which suggested that the novel was at least partly autobiographical. Coincidentally (?), it's also a novel about a street kid (in Paris). The author's real name finally had to be revealed after the book won France's highest literary award! It's a great novel, which was also made into an Oscar-winning film.
the last novel that shocked me was "the sluts", it's about a male prostitute in la and it's told entirely through ratings posted to an old forum it's deeply disturbing and sometimes it became too much, it felt violent for violence's sake, but i really appreciated how the lines between reality and lies are blurred online, and this was a really interesting internet biome to explore (who would be 100% honest on a private forum for gay prostitutes in 2001?) but please do check the trigger warnings before reading!
honestly anything by dennis cooper is a great pick for someone looking for a deranged and gut-wrenching read, he’s completely off the rails (and i love it)
Ohhhhh, yes. I have had Crash by J.G Ballard and The Sluts on my imaginary tbr for a long time. Surprisingly I haven't read anything by Cooper, but I know that it would be exactly what I want to read.
missed ur energy queen!! i haven’t read too many books that disturb me to my core (thankfully lol) but My Heart is a Chainsaw has some gory bits but i love it hehe
i’m reading lapvona right now and i can definitely see why it’s such a divisive book among ottessa moshfegh fans lol, it is indeed gross and unhinged; that being said, i do really like it so far, especially the atmosphere-it’s very A24 period horror movie (à la the witch) so it’s a perfect halloween read!
ohhhh yes, ol Moshfegh is a wild girlie and I'm here for it. I felt like Hurricane Season could easily be made into an A24 film and I would absolutely collapse when viewing it
The Ice Storm by Rick Moody Animal by Lisa Taddeo Leave the World Behind by Rumaan Alam The Days of Abandonment by Elena Ferrante Equus by Peter Shaffer To the Bridge by Nancy Rommelmann I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin anything by Bret Easton Ellis
Beyond extreme horror, the most disturbing books I've read are: The Bastard out of Carolina- Dorothy Allison Betty- Tiffany McDaniel The Devil All the Time- Donald Ray Pollock The first two have remarkable heart in them as well which make them all the more brutal because you truly love the characters. Pollock is just a study in depravity. There's something about Appalachia that makes brilliant storytellers.
Ooh, have you read The Summer That Melted Everything by Tiffany McDaniel? So good, very disturbing in its own right. I think she's one of my favorite authors
@@cindyo6298 I did love that one too. Not quite as much as Betty. I need to read her newest but I think I can only handle one McDaniel book a year. She breaks my heart too badly. I actually wrote to her after finishing TSTME because there was a theme in both books I wanted to ask her about and she replied and was so lovely. Definitely a favourite.
@@AnaWallaceJohnsonthere’s a free pdf online too!! I understand wanting the physical copy tho. But they take up space and money so free pdfs are pretty great
It really is so demented and bleak. I think you want to relate to the main character, and you can understand how he got this way, but...I won't say anything else.
I couldn’t finish a little life. It was sending me into a severe depression. It’s just such a slog through trauma more and more and more. I couldn’t do it.
"Haunted" is one I had Chuck sign when I met him. "Mysterious Skin" I actually bought signed from The Strand Annex in 1999. I'd read some of his work in a Lit elective the year prior. Scott's a super human being. Chuck, too.
i love you. i'm currently reading the people in the trees and when you started talking about it babe - it really did something to me. exactly my thoughts. wtf is even this book? and who told her she was allowed to write this? lmao i'm so confused but i can't stop reading.
Story of the Eye by Georges Bataille - it was recommended by another book loving youtuber Better than Coffee. I can take dark and disturbing but this is to a level where I got rid of the book as soon as I finished it. And was disgusted with myself for reading it all the way through. Didn't even want it in my house. Yikes. "OOF!!!"
JG Ballard is a must. Crash aside, have a look for High Rise (phenomenal) and The Atrocity Exhibition (talk about woah). Absurdist metaphor of the highest order!
No one has mentioned Philip Jose Farmer. Image of The Beast is one I have reread a couple of times. Very interesting in its explanation for vampires, werewolves and many other mythological creatures.
Just finished Hurricane Season based on your recommendation and yes it definitely earned your 3 ‘Oof’ rating! Incredible writing, rich violent storytelling, the book literally seethed with anger and malice 👍
My pick for the most disturbing and shocking "literary" (i.e. not an "extreme horror" novel) I've ever read is "Blood Meridian or the Evening Redness in the West" (1985) by Cormac McCarthy.
I just finished a very disturbing but amazing book. Down Here in the Warmth by Euel Arden. Violent and raw and not afraid to set off trigger warnings. Definitely a zeitgeist of the times. How can you go wrong with Militia on the streets of Manhattan.
Earthlings by Sayaka Murata was thoroughly concerning for me, but I don't know if I enjoyed or not. I still love her writing, but it went a little far for me.
Why do we read, watch, just consume in general, art that makes us sad, uncomfortable, disturbed etc? Like why do I purposefully watch or read something that I know is going to be really harrowing, it's odd
Thank you for this video! I'm always looking for disturbing book recommendations! Tampa is one I put down and will probably never pick up again! Just reading it felt illegal. 😵💫 A book I've read that I don't hear people talk about, as far as disturbing books go, is The Little Girl Who Was Too Fond Of Matches by Gaétan Soucy! It loosely reminded me of the movie Dogtooth. The way it's written makes it a challenging read, but very rewarding in the end. ☺️
I am now sitting here, sick and propped up only by my chair and the noodles I'm having for dinner. I'm sick, but not sick sick, so I can't even go crawling for sympathy. Needless to say- this video is a godsend. Also, you are looking fabulous! You are winning me over to the Piano Teacher, my lord. I have seen it your videos on it, but I'm really intrigued! I think I'm pretty stereotypical in saying that the most disturbing book experience I've had was reading Rant by Chuck Palahniuk. To be fair, I was around 14 years old then, and WAY too young. (For what it's worth, I think it's incredibly worthwhile for kids to read books that are "too old". It's like when your parents say 'I drove without a seatbelt at 14', except youre a suburban teenager and laws exist). Other examples that I love are: Close Range by Annie Proulx, the collection that includes Brokeback Mountain. It is NOT Brokeback Mountain that disturbed me the most, I can assure you of that much. Perfume by Patrick Süskind is a killer one that I actually read WHILE in Paris. THAT was an experience.
Omg!! Feel better! It's runny nose and sick season, so stay hydrated and well rested! And didn't realize Annie Proulx had a disturbing novel. Ready to get weird with that one! And I forgot about Perfume! I listened to that on audiobook, so I think the experience wasn't as heavy as I wanted it to be!!!
@@AnaWallaceJohnson If I could go back in time and save my copy of Close Range instead of giving it back to my school, I absolutely would have. Close Range is actually a collection of short stories with Brokeback Mountain being the most (obviously) well-known. There is a very heavy and long-running theme of violence against those who don't fit into the western "mould" of what a Wyoming man should be. It is about how the land hardens them, but also about how society forces them into the violence of isolation, as well as violence in order to preserve their own status and masculinity. And yeah, it goes there. If I were to buy any short story collection, it would 100% be Close Range. If you ever read In Cold Blood by Truman Capote (could also be classified as a disturbing read, but the writing is just so damn good that I can't even manage to be disturbed) and want something with a similar feel or vibe, Close Range would definitely be your girl.
The Sluts by Dennis Cooper For me, no disturbing book has topped this, including Tampa and A Certain Hunger. It's written entirely in internet forums, emails, etc., circa AOL. It begins as reviews on an gay escort services review sites, and gets darker from there. Basically, you think of it, someone is turned on by it. Check the trigger warnings because there are things worse than death in here. I think what made me keep reading wasn't just the horror of it all (at some points I did have to take a break), but more so the way the author made you question what was real, who was actually who they say they were and who wasn't. He utilized the world of the internet where nothing can be trusted and yet everything comes from the human mind. It's probably the only book I wish I could cleanse from my brain, but at the same time the experience did change me. Please let me know if you (whoever is reading this) have read it.
I'm sooooo intrigued by The Sluts haha. I was just having a deep conversation with one of my friends about it. We both are ready to take the plunge. Crazy enough, as gory as it is, I haven't heard major complaints about it.
ahhhh so excited you made this video, im definitely gonna read the piano teacher!! in the vein of disturbing fiction, i think dennis cooper's 5 (6, if you count i wished) novella george miles cycle which is 100% my favourite thing ive read so far this year! it's v graphic though so warning for that, but it's truly fantastic. also crash by jg ballard was so so so defining for me last year, and the move is one of my favourites of all time :-)
AGREE about the movie of Crash. Rosanna Arquette and James Spader do not get the love they deserve! I want to read the novel sooooo bad. And basically anything Dennis Cooper too!
@@AnaWallaceJohnson YESSSSS agreed, rosanna arquette was my favourite part of it and james spader just did so many freaksex movies between 1989-2002...national hero honestly! also yes :D if im remembering right, there's also a movie adaptation of cooper's frisk that stars parker posey (that im yet to see, was heartbroken that gregg araki didn't get to fulfil his dream of directing it but alas) if that might also be of interest to you !
Hurricane Season is one I want to head to over ‘spooky dooky’ season. I loved This is Not Miami earlier this year, though I think it was a bit lighter. I’ve still not read The People in the Trees. Hahaha. The oofs. Oooooof. Ps. Lapvona, Lapvona, Lapvona.
Such interesting recommendations! “Tender is the Flesh” and “The Wasp Factory” are a bit like that too. Have you read anything by J.G. Ballard? “Crash” is definitely a wtf novel😂
So wild you say that. I've been looking for a used copy of Crash for years. It's one of the major books on my imaginary TBR. I loved the movie, so I need to get the novel.
I read sci-fi, so I read a number of Banks’s Culture series and was shocked by the gore/utopia-esque nature of those books (Use of Weapons is amazing and one of the craziest character flips I’ve read in a long time). I see The Wasp Factory, realize it’s the same author without the middle initial, think oh this should be fun, Banks in a more literary context… Holy snot, what a messed up book, really good but… I have it on my shelf, I’ll never recommend it and never reread it, and if someone saw it on my shelf and knew about the book they would judge me for it. More disturbing than anything Palahniuk has written IMO.
The Impossibly by Laird Hunt is interesting because he kind of dances around underworld types doing very fucked up shit and there’s even a bit of a love story in there. It has its fans but it is not as well known as something that wild should be
Your channel is just lovely! I assume that you’ve read “Earthlings” by Sayaka Murata. It could probably go on the weird books, although it’s a bit disturbing…
you KNOW I immediately clicked on this video, because it's Ana and because of the title 👀 [eta] - yep. Guts. It got me. I set the book down after that and never revisited it ever again
Love ya! Sometimes I think about Guts and it doesn't feel like it's something that should've ever been written, but then again, I have read the book 3x and it's the main story that sticks with me, so what's that say about me haha!
"Pompey" by Jonathan Meads is a wild and extremely uncomfortable ride, everyone of the protagonists is a dreadful human being, its weird, violent, disgusting in places and like nothing I've ever read before, after reading, the author suggests that the reader should wash their hands, and with good reason. all of Meads' books are very well written and more than a little peculiar,
Just discovered your channel and this is the first video i've viewed. You're utterly gorgeous and I have added most of these to my TBR list now lol. Two books I recommend are, Tender is the Flesh by Agustina Bazterrica and Exquisite Corpse by Poppy Z Brite (:
My what the f*ck did I just read book was Maeve Fly by CJ Leede. If you read it and do another video on this topic- I’d be curious as to what you thought.
I’ve been gone on vacation so I have all of your videos over the past month or so to catch up on and I can’t wait! That being said I couldn’t resist watching this one first to tell you to read the novella/short story called “The Beauty” by Aliya Whiteley. It takes deranged to a WHOLE new level and is deeply disturbing at times. The writing itself is incredible if you can get past the story premise 😆 that’s all I’m gonna say about it
Did you ever read “lost souls” by Poppy Z Brite? That’s the wildest book I’ve ever read. I never laughed so hard over a book in my life, yet never read a book that crossed so many boundaries.
Naked Lunch and Last Exit To Brooklyn probably tops for me. Also maybe Lolita--because it's largely played for laughs! A comedy about pedophilia! Also Blood Meridian but not necessarily for the graphic descriptions of violence but the seemingly random slaughtering of women and children. Then I figured out, "Oh, I get it. The scalp collectors won't know the difference and Apaches are too hard to find and plus, you know, they're Apaches". If McCarthy held your hand and made that clear it would somehow seem less shocking.
My experience of Clive Barker is that he always seems to try and 'out lovecraft Lovecraft' shocking for shocks sake which isn't for me, I thought the original candy man movie was pretty good though. The dice man by Luke Rhinehart is pretty shocking, it's about a man who uses dice to decide what his next decision will be and it goes to some very dark places. Also Stephen King 'Revival' I found really very dark.. kinda cliché bringing up Stephen King I know..
Elogio a la Madrastra de Mario Vargas Llosa o en Ingles In Praise of the Stepmother should be in this list if you like deranged and disturbing go read that
Well then you might as well read Melchor's "Paradais" and become totally ill 😸😆 If you really want to be disturbed there is Mendel Johnson's "Let's Go Play At the Adams" from the 70s. But beware going into it unprepared! Johnson drank himself to death within a year or so of writing it
Omg WHAT in the world is that book? hahaha. I have never heard of it, but it's insane to think that the premise was made into a novel. Definitely intrigued.
@@AnaWallaceJohnson 😸😆 It is sort of a classic among extreme horror readers, but is well-written. TOO well-written, it might be said. The focus is sadistic, soulless kids and what they do to a helpless babysitter, and it is completely uncompromising. It is easy to find online though the copies tend to be old. I was recently hearing talk about a pending re-release. Don't be fooled by phonies who claim they wrote sequels to it, the horrifying story ended with its author's life!
Personally it weirdly helps me cope. There’s times when I can’t read that stuff and there’s different levels, I more so like weird horror that’s more magical more than just people Suffering for the sake of suffering with real world context. But I also can’t watch scary movies so idk lol
God, fine. Here we go again. Adding *more* books to my wish list, you goddam queen lol. If I was to recommend a disturbing book, it would be Last Days by Brian Evenson.
13:06 - People actually passed out during Palaniuk's readings of Guts while he was on the book tour for Haunted. I've read it and it makes me feel ill just to think about it.
Everything by Cormac McCarthy especially - BLOOD MERIDIAN
The writing in Blood Meridian is just absurdly good. The Road is MUCH more depressing.
Absolutely ✌️
@@kellymoses8566 it is depressing but I always felt The Road was about what it looks like to maintain faith in the worst circumstances. The father is on his last legs trying to instill decency in the son and ultimately he is successful. The son carries on the hope for civilization however faint it is.
On the other hand, Blood Meridian has no shred of lingering hope. We're all just going to get devoured by a giant, bald, naked, pale man who doesn't like it when you refuse to dance.
The Bible scarred me for life
Tbh, yes.
Marrying your rapist?
Getting pregnant by your FIL and then he tries to honor kill you ?
Approved and specific wholesale genocide ?
Getting tricked and then raped by your halfbro?
Murdering your best underling cuz you want his wife?
Selling your little brother and telling your dad he was eaten by animals?
Being tested by God that if you really love him you’ll kill your kids?
A man offering his daughters to be raped instead of his guests?
Then there’s all the crazy inventive ways to die. And injunctions against fucking animals or humans that don’t want it. Unless God says it’s okay.
And then dont get me started on the crucifixion fixation.
The Bible does have some pretty messed up stuff in it, like the entirety of Revelations.
I could never get past the beginning.
You're right. The Book of Numbers is seriously messed up.
I just found your youtube recently and Im obsessed! you're the only booktuber I've found who reads books I'd have any interest in lol
Love you so much for saying that. Thank you for being here
Always enjoy a good Down with the Sickness rendition, thank you.
ew WAH AH AH AH!!!
Great recs going straight to my tbr! And your hair looks so beautiful!
Great video as always, thank you!
Love from Portugal :)
Thank you so much! sending hugs from nyc!
The Painted Bird by Jerzy Kosinski is a horrific portrayal of humanity similar to Blood Meridian or Last Exit to Brooklyn
Last Exit to Brooklyn is bleak without relief. I feel like if you read it during a rainy week in November it might just take you down with it. Have you read Earthlings by Sayaka Murata? It's super disturbing and trippy and a little Vonnegut-esque in my opinion.
Yep! I highly suggest sitting in the sun and reading that one through. Avoid the doom and gloom
As soon as you pulled out “The Piano Teacher” I immediately liked and subscribed.
You have taste girly!❣️
The Piano Teacher movie adaptation is one of the best ever. Highly recommend.
I agree! I have a video where I read the book and watch the movie! Isabella Huppert is an icon
@@AnaWallaceJohnson I’ll definitely have to check that out. Greatest actress of all time in my eyes.
Most of the "Disturbing Book" videos I've seen are just the same couple of books over and over again so good job on picking some ones I haven't heard of.
Seeing that Sarah Kane collection absolutely gave me visceral flashbacks
Right? hang onto your eyeballs, amirite??
Mysterious Skin is incredibly powerful, I saw the film a few years ago and now am reading the book. He has so much empathy for these characters in a horrid situation which sadly a lot of us can relate to.
Just found your channel and immediatly subscribed. My disturbing read was 'Tender is the flesh'. The most disturbing thing is that I can actually believe that this could happen. Not for the faint of heart/stomach.
It's not exactly a shocking novel, but the controversy over French writer Romain Gary's "The Life Before Us" was basically the same as that over "Heart is Deceitful . . ." The author was very well known for his writing (and other achievements), but he wanted the novel to be read on its own, rather than as *his* product, so he published it under an Arab name which suggested that the novel was at least partly autobiographical. Coincidentally (?), it's also a novel about a street kid (in Paris). The author's real name finally had to be revealed after the book won France's highest literary award! It's a great novel, which was also made into an Oscar-winning film.
my day gets better when ana uploads a new video
love ya so much for that
the last novel that shocked me was "the sluts", it's about a male prostitute in la and it's told entirely through ratings posted to an old forum
it's deeply disturbing and sometimes it became too much, it felt violent for violence's sake, but i really appreciated how the lines between reality and lies are blurred online, and this was a really interesting internet biome to explore (who would be 100% honest on a private forum for gay prostitutes in 2001?) but please do check the trigger warnings before reading!
honestly anything by dennis cooper is a great pick for someone looking for a deranged and gut-wrenching read, he’s completely off the rails (and i love it)
Ohhhhh, yes. I have had Crash by J.G Ballard and The Sluts on my imaginary tbr for a long time. Surprisingly I haven't read anything by Cooper, but I know that it would be exactly what I want to read.
missed ur energy queen!! i haven’t read too many books that disturb me to my core (thankfully lol) but My Heart is a Chainsaw has some gory bits but i love it hehe
oooh, even that title alone makes me feel like it would be a fun gorefest
Sorry, but My Heart is a Chainsaw did not resonate at all. I thought the whole project was stupid.
I haven’t started the video yet but it’s my favourite video of yours already. Fire content girlll
That Disturbed reference😂
ew wah ah ah ah!!!!
Loved your comment about how the shocking or deranged events in the book has to be integral to what the story is about. Great insight.
i’m reading lapvona right now and i can definitely see why it’s such a divisive book among ottessa moshfegh fans lol, it is indeed gross and unhinged; that being said, i do really like it so far, especially the atmosphere-it’s very A24 period horror movie (à la the witch) so it’s a perfect halloween read!
ohhhh yes, ol Moshfegh is a wild girlie and I'm here for it. I felt like Hurricane Season could easily be made into an A24 film and I would absolutely collapse when viewing it
The Last Exit to Brooklyn is amazing. The chapters "Tralala" and "Strike" are profound and unforgettable.
The Ice Storm by Rick Moody
Animal by Lisa Taddeo
Leave the World Behind by Rumaan Alam
The Days of Abandonment by Elena Ferrante
Equus by Peter Shaffer
To the Bridge by Nancy Rommelmann
I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman
Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin
anything by Bret Easton Ellis
Hubert Selby's "The Room" is awfully disturbing and shocking. So is his "Last Exit to Brooklyn".
Beyond extreme horror, the most disturbing books I've read are:
The Bastard out of Carolina- Dorothy Allison
Betty- Tiffany McDaniel
The Devil All the Time- Donald Ray Pollock
The first two have remarkable heart in them as well which make them all the more brutal because you truly love the characters. Pollock is just a study in depravity. There's something about Appalachia that makes brilliant storytellers.
Ooh, have you read The Summer That Melted Everything by Tiffany McDaniel? So good, very disturbing in its own right. I think she's one of my favorite authors
@@cindyo6298 I did love that one too. Not quite as much as Betty. I need to read her newest but I think I can only handle one McDaniel book a year. She breaks my heart too badly. I actually wrote to her after finishing TSTME because there was a theme in both books I wanted to ask her about and she replied and was so lovely. Definitely a favourite.
!!!! omg, Appalachia storytelling is truly unparalleled. And I think it makes the teller naturally a little spooky. Feel that way about Louisiana too!
Thank you for this! I'm adding Hurricane Season and Mysterious Skin to my TBR
You have to read "Tender is the Flesh" by Agustina Bazterrica. Its absolutely amazing!!! Hugs from Argentina 🥰
I second this
YES YES YES! So disturbing but so good! It didn't feel exploitative or sensationalized just for the sake of shock value. Highly recommend!
I've heard it's an iconic read! I'm ready to get a copy and devour that wildness
@@AnaWallaceJohnson buen provecho 😋
@@AnaWallaceJohnsonthere’s a free pdf online too!! I understand wanting the physical copy tho. But they take up space and money so free pdfs are pretty great
Have you tried reading 120 Days of Sodom by the Marquis de Sade? You might try it, if only to see how far you can take it.
We Need to Talk about Kevin disturbed me so much! I’ve never googled reviews so quickly after finishing it. It changed me in a horrific way 😅
omg! I've only ever seen the movie and contemplate reading the novel all the time, but the movie knocked me out hard
The Room by Hubert Selby Jr is more disturbing than Last Exit to Brooklyn but I don't recommend reading it.
Waiting Period is incredible, too. A remarkable author
Why does i don’t recommend reading it make me wanna read it even more 😅
I decided to read all of Selby's books so of course this is the next One!
It really is so demented and bleak. I think you want to relate to the main character, and you can understand how he got this way, but...I won't say anything else.
Last Exit to Brooklyn….ooooffff. That’s a gut punch.
In one of your vids you recommended Sedaris' Theft by Finding. Book arrived this morning. looking forward to give it a read.
omg!!! I hope you love it! Such a comfort read for any weird, struggly time in your life
I couldn’t finish a little life. It was sending me into a severe depression. It’s just such a slog through trauma more and more and more. I couldn’t do it.
"Haunted" is one I had Chuck sign when I met him. "Mysterious Skin" I actually bought signed from The Strand Annex in 1999. I'd read some of his work in a Lit elective the year prior. Scott's a super human being. Chuck, too.
i read ‘the yellow wallpaper’ this weekend and definitely found it disturbing. perfect little read to keep coming back to
oh yes! I want to read that. I've been hearing so much about it recently.
i love you.
i'm currently reading the people in the trees and when you started talking about it babe - it really did something to me. exactly my thoughts. wtf is even this book? and who told her she was allowed to write this? lmao i'm so confused but i can't stop reading.
I seem to have come to the right place, I have the stomach for it. I think I'll give "Tampa" a read, thanks for the suggestion.
Story of the Eye by Georges Bataille - it was recommended by another book loving youtuber Better than Coffee. I can take dark and disturbing but this is to a level where I got rid of the book as soon as I finished it. And was disgusted with myself for reading it all the way through. Didn't even want it in my house. Yikes. "OOF!!!"
JG Ballard is a must. Crash aside, have a look for High Rise (phenomenal) and The Atrocity Exhibition (talk about woah). Absurdist metaphor of the highest order!
Thank you for the reccos!! I think I'll get into a deep rabbit hole with him either the end of this year or into next
*adds every book to my TBR* I will follow you into the darkness Ana
lmaoooo I've got one little candle guiding us all
No one has mentioned Philip Jose Farmer. Image of The Beast is one I have reread a couple of times. Very interesting in its explanation for vampires, werewolves and many other mythological creatures.
Actually thinking about rereading Haunted, and rereading/continuing Palahniuk books.
Hubert Selby Jnr. - "The Room". Absolutely crushing.
Please tell me you've read Earthlings or Life Ceremony by Sayaka Murata. Or Cursed Bunny by Bora Chung.
Just finished Hurricane Season based on your recommendation and yes it definitely earned your 3 ‘Oof’ rating! Incredible writing, rich violent storytelling, the book literally seethed with anger and malice 👍
My pick for the most disturbing and shocking "literary" (i.e. not an "extreme horror" novel) I've ever read is "Blood Meridian or the Evening Redness in the West" (1985) by Cormac McCarthy.
WHERE have you been hiding? So glad I found your channel 🙏
I just finished a very disturbing but amazing book. Down Here in the Warmth by Euel Arden. Violent and raw and not afraid to set off trigger warnings. Definitely a zeitgeist of the times. How can you go wrong with Militia on the streets of Manhattan.
Earthlings by Sayaka Murata was thoroughly concerning for me, but I don't know if I enjoyed or not. I still love her writing, but it went a little far for me.
You have to read Earthlings by Sayaka Murata !!
The Cows by Matthew Stokoe is one of the most disturbing books I’ve ever read
Why do we read, watch, just consume in general, art that makes us sad, uncomfortable, disturbed etc? Like why do I purposefully watch or read something that I know is going to be really harrowing, it's odd
Thank you for this video! I'm always looking for disturbing book recommendations! Tampa is one I put down and will probably never pick up again! Just reading it felt illegal. 😵💫
A book I've read that I don't hear people talk about, as far as disturbing books go, is The Little Girl Who Was Too Fond Of Matches by Gaétan Soucy! It loosely reminded me of the movie Dogtooth. The way it's written makes it a challenging read, but very rewarding in the end. ☺️
I am now sitting here, sick and propped up only by my chair and the noodles I'm having for dinner. I'm sick, but not sick sick, so I can't even go crawling for sympathy. Needless to say- this video is a godsend. Also, you are looking fabulous!
You are winning me over to the Piano Teacher, my lord. I have seen it your videos on it, but I'm really intrigued!
I think I'm pretty stereotypical in saying that the most disturbing book experience I've had was reading Rant by Chuck Palahniuk. To be fair, I was around 14 years old then, and WAY too young. (For what it's worth, I think it's incredibly worthwhile for kids to read books that are "too old". It's like when your parents say 'I drove without a seatbelt at 14', except youre a suburban teenager and laws exist).
Other examples that I love are: Close Range by Annie Proulx, the collection that includes Brokeback Mountain. It is NOT Brokeback Mountain that disturbed me the most, I can assure you of that much. Perfume by Patrick Süskind is a killer one that I actually read WHILE in Paris. THAT was an experience.
Omg!! Feel better! It's runny nose and sick season, so stay hydrated and well rested!
And didn't realize Annie Proulx had a disturbing novel. Ready to get weird with that one! And I forgot about Perfume! I listened to that on audiobook, so I think the experience wasn't as heavy as I wanted it to be!!!
@@AnaWallaceJohnson If I could go back in time and save my copy of Close Range instead of giving it back to my school, I absolutely would have. Close Range is actually a collection of short stories with Brokeback Mountain being the most (obviously) well-known. There is a very heavy and long-running theme of violence against those who don't fit into the western "mould" of what a Wyoming man should be. It is about how the land hardens them, but also about how society forces them into the violence of isolation, as well as violence in order to preserve their own status and masculinity.
And yeah, it goes there. If I were to buy any short story collection, it would 100% be Close Range. If you ever read In Cold Blood by Truman Capote (could also be classified as a disturbing read, but the writing is just so damn good that I can't even manage to be disturbed) and want something with a similar feel or vibe, Close Range would definitely be your girl.
I thought "The Vegetarian" by Han Kang was pretty disturbing
Yeah, I agree! I read that this year and it was weird for sure.
The Sluts by Dennis Cooper
For me, no disturbing book has topped this, including Tampa and A Certain Hunger. It's written entirely in internet forums, emails, etc., circa AOL. It begins as reviews on an gay escort services review sites, and gets darker from there. Basically, you think of it, someone is turned on by it. Check the trigger warnings because there are things worse than death in here. I think what made me keep reading wasn't just the horror of it all (at some points I did have to take a break), but more so the way the author made you question what was real, who was actually who they say they were and who wasn't. He utilized the world of the internet where nothing can be trusted and yet everything comes from the human mind. It's probably the only book I wish I could cleanse from my brain, but at the same time the experience did change me. Please let me know if you (whoever is reading this) have read it.
I'm sooooo intrigued by The Sluts haha. I was just having a deep conversation with one of my friends about it. We both are ready to take the plunge. Crazy enough, as gory as it is, I haven't heard major complaints about it.
Me too i think she was still alive when it came out. Maybe she just looked the other way.
ahhhh so excited you made this video, im definitely gonna read the piano teacher!! in the vein of disturbing fiction, i think dennis cooper's 5 (6, if you count i wished) novella george miles cycle which is 100% my favourite thing ive read so far this year! it's v graphic though so warning for that, but it's truly fantastic. also crash by jg ballard was so so so defining for me last year, and the move is one of my favourites of all time :-)
^ especially if you like palahniuk, i always see him and dennis cooper as sort of in conversation/operating in a similar vein
AGREE about the movie of Crash. Rosanna Arquette and James Spader do not get the love they deserve! I want to read the novel sooooo bad. And basically anything Dennis Cooper too!
@@AnaWallaceJohnson YESSSSS agreed, rosanna arquette was my favourite part of it and james spader just did so many freaksex movies between 1989-2002...national hero honestly! also yes :D if im remembering right, there's also a movie adaptation of cooper's frisk that stars parker posey (that im yet to see, was heartbroken that gregg araki didn't get to fulfil his dream of directing it but alas) if that might also be of interest to you !
At some point somebody's eyeball get's checked for posterior vitreous detachment. That's what she bleeped out.
Thanks for opening up a whole new dimension for me.
Minds have been altered!
Yaaas! Hurrican season! Incredible
this video was so needed in my life 🖤 story of the eye 👁️ is my top disturbing pick 👁️ 💧
Hurricane Season is one I want to head to over ‘spooky dooky’ season. I loved This is Not Miami earlier this year, though I think it was a bit lighter. I’ve still not read The People in the Trees. Hahaha. The oofs. Oooooof. Ps. Lapvona, Lapvona, Lapvona.
I knoooow. I want to read more Moshfegh in general. I feel like I'd want to get a cup of tea with her! And be WEIRD!
Such interesting recommendations! “Tender is the Flesh” and “The Wasp Factory” are a bit like that too. Have you read anything by J.G. Ballard? “Crash” is definitely a wtf novel😂
Omg Crash is nuts.
So wild you say that. I've been looking for a used copy of Crash for years. It's one of the major books on my imaginary TBR. I loved the movie, so I need to get the novel.
@@AnaWallaceJohnson oooh...nice! Then you'll love it!
I read sci-fi, so I read a number of Banks’s Culture series and was shocked by the gore/utopia-esque nature of those books (Use of Weapons is amazing and one of the craziest character flips I’ve read in a long time). I see The Wasp Factory, realize it’s the same author without the middle initial, think oh this should be fun, Banks in a more literary context…
Holy snot, what a messed up book, really good but… I have it on my shelf, I’ll never recommend it and never reread it, and if someone saw it on my shelf and knew about the book they would judge me for it. More disturbing than anything Palahniuk has written IMO.
I saw Sarah Kane's Blasted at Soho Rep and it was one of the best theater experiences of my life.
Try Hogg by Samuel R. Delany! It's like the modern and realistic version of the Marquis de Sade
The Impossibly by Laird Hunt is interesting because he kind of dances around underworld types doing very fucked up shit and there’s even a bit of a love story in there. It has its fans but it is not as well known as something that wild should be
Your channel is just lovely! I assume that you’ve read “Earthlings” by Sayaka Murata. It could probably go on the weird books, although it’s a bit disturbing…
you KNOW I immediately clicked on this video, because it's Ana and because of the title 👀
[eta] - yep. Guts. It got me. I set the book down after that and never revisited it ever again
Love ya! Sometimes I think about Guts and it doesn't feel like it's something that should've ever been written, but then again, I have read the book 3x and it's the main story that sticks with me, so what's that say about me haha!
"Pompey" by Jonathan Meads is a wild and extremely uncomfortable ride, everyone of the protagonists is a dreadful human being, its weird, violent, disgusting in places and like nothing I've ever read before,
after reading, the author suggests that the reader should wash their hands,
and with good reason.
all of Meads' books are very well written and more than a little peculiar,
Ana, I can not reccommend Leila Slimani to you. So disturbing and I loved her!
Oh yes! I've heard about her writing--which book do you suggest?
@@AnaWallaceJohnson I have read both “Adele” and “The Perfect Nanny” and was Wooow!
Lord of Dark Places is a rare, oop, disturbing book. Also, Harry Crew's Scarlover is tremendous.
Just discovered your channel and this is the first video i've viewed. You're utterly gorgeous and I have added most of these to my TBR list now lol. Two books I recommend are, Tender is the Flesh by Agustina Bazterrica and Exquisite Corpse by Poppy Z Brite (:
My what the f*ck did I just read book was Maeve Fly by CJ Leede. If you read it and do another video on this topic- I’d be curious as to what you thought.
"A Little Life" became a 4 hour play in the West End.
I heard! Also heard it was pretty rough to get through
I’ve been gone on vacation so I have all of your videos over the past month or so to catch up on and I can’t wait! That being said I couldn’t resist watching this one first to tell you to read the novella/short story called “The Beauty” by Aliya Whiteley. It takes deranged to a WHOLE new level and is deeply disturbing at times. The writing itself is incredible if you can get past the story premise 😆 that’s all I’m gonna say about it
So happy you're here! And oh man, post apocalyptic fiction just hits different!! makes you think how you'd react if given the situation
Did you ever read “lost souls” by Poppy Z Brite? That’s the wildest book I’ve ever read. I never laughed so hard over a book in my life, yet never read a book that crossed so many boundaries.
Naked Lunch and Last Exit To Brooklyn probably tops for me. Also maybe Lolita--because it's largely played for laughs! A comedy about pedophilia! Also Blood Meridian but not necessarily for the graphic descriptions of violence but the seemingly random slaughtering of women and children. Then I figured out, "Oh, I get it. The scalp collectors won't know the difference and Apaches are too hard to find and plus, you know, they're Apaches". If McCarthy held your hand and made that clear it would somehow seem less shocking.
5:07 Nice build up \m/!
The Consumer by Michael Gira. Very disturbing short stories.
Perfume: The Story of a Murderer by Patrick Süskind is the most recent bizarre story I have read
ooh yes Sarah Kane is such a good wild rec!
Flipping through it made me realize it was time to pick it back up
My absolute darlin just took me out
Haunted genuinely made me feel unwell :')
Gotta have that barf bag ready at all moments
The story of the eye, Boy parts and Push.
My experience of Clive Barker is that he always seems to try and 'out lovecraft Lovecraft' shocking for shocks sake which isn't for me, I thought the original candy man movie was pretty good though. The dice man by Luke Rhinehart is pretty shocking, it's about a man who uses dice to decide what his next decision will be and it goes to some very dark places. Also Stephen King 'Revival' I found really very dark.. kinda cliché bringing up Stephen King I know..
Great Nail Polish
Pierre Guyotat.. Georges Bataille… Dennis Cooper… Hal Bennett… De Sade.. Ryu Murakami…
Hal Bennett!! I couldn't remember the name. Lord of Dark Places was wild. Thanks
Elogio a la Madrastra de Mario Vargas Llosa o en Ingles In Praise of the Stepmother should be in this list if you like deranged and disturbing go read that
Well then you might as well read Melchor's "Paradais" and become totally ill 😸😆 If you really want to be disturbed there is Mendel Johnson's "Let's Go Play At the Adams" from the 70s. But beware going into it unprepared! Johnson drank himself to death within a year or so of writing it
Omg WHAT in the world is that book? hahaha. I have never heard of it, but it's insane to think that the premise was made into a novel. Definitely intrigued.
@@AnaWallaceJohnson 😸😆 It is sort of a classic among extreme horror readers, but is well-written. TOO well-written, it might be said. The focus is sadistic, soulless kids and what they do to a helpless babysitter, and it is completely uncompromising. It is easy to find online though the copies tend to be old. I was recently hearing talk about a pending re-release. Don't be fooled by phonies who claim they wrote sequels to it, the horrifying story ended with its author's life!
I definitely second Paradais! Liked it even more than Hurricane Season.
You should read Desperation by Stephen King
Please
For actually disturbing I think only naked lunch and off season have registered. Edward lee’s the bighead is super messed up too
Oooh, I’m getting back into transgressive fiction lately. Pray for me lmao
Mugwumps unite!
Fulcrum by Jason Alan Patterson scared the hell out of me. And I wrote it.
Rlly??
The Blind Owl by Sadegh Hedayat is definitely one to pick if you're looking for disturbing books.
!!! oh yeah, this one has been on my radar for a looong time
The paino teacher was sick
This Little Family by Ines Bayard - still haunts me! And I’m a die hard fan off all things horrific and disturbing
noted! I loooove a good crime fix!
I'm curious why people seek out really disturbing content for entertainment when there's plenty of disturbing things happening in day to day life.
Personally it weirdly helps me cope. There’s times when I can’t read that stuff and there’s different levels, I more so like weird horror that’s more magical more than just people
Suffering for the sake of suffering with real world context. But I also can’t watch scary movies so idk lol
Esp reading things that center around grief, reading about a character who’s working through similar feelings as me is cathartic in a way
@@Nagchampa765 Grief I can understand. I was thinking about books that are extremely disturbing.
God, fine. Here we go again. Adding *more* books to my wish list, you goddam queen lol. If I was to recommend a disturbing book, it would be Last Days by Brian Evenson.
Kind of random (and not on your list) but I thought Beautiful You and The Gargoyle were pretty f'ing disturbing.