Love is not a sprint. It’s a long slow walk. There are many stages of development necessary to build solid foundations. Too many couples rush into certain territories far too soon and negatively impact the direction and outcome of their relationships. Most relationships never recover from these mistakes. On this episode, Benjamin Zulu outlines common and very costly mistakes that all dating couples should avoid. Do not forget to subscribe to our RUclips channel.. Click here to subscribe -- ruclips.net/user/switchtvkenya
"Dont fall in love with him before u get his assurance...dont be afraid to lose him or he will take u in on his own terms n not on ur own terms..DATE WITH PURPOSE ,FOR WOMEN"-that hit me hard
Here is a summary of what has been mentioned : 1)Dating too soon, before 25 2)Dating for way too long (when it goes over 2 years, you’re wasting your time) ‼️The man pursues but the woman determines the standard‼️ 3)Don’t commit too soon (eg.getting pregant) 4)Don’t involve so many people in your relationship
"it's not the man or the woman you marry that gives you the greatest happiness, it's achieving your purpose in life!" those deep words need to be shouted much louder to a society obsessed with romanticized relationships and love while paying less attention to self care and self purpose. Thank you Benjamin! Love from Nigeria!
Am turning 21,and the point on 'don't get in love before assurance', this was for me for real😭, I'm now thinking of concentrating on my books, get my 1st class degree, build my life in this short 4years,thanks Benjamin for the talk, Girls hope tumeskia
I feel like he is right am almost turning 26 and I discovered myself just when I turned 25 and knew the kind of people I want around... Heeeh this guy I love this sanaa
Thank you Benjamin.....I fully agree with what you’re saying....I made the same mistakes of Dating early when I was on the age of 19 to 25 and it never worked until I took time for myself to learn and understand who I really am as a person ,my purpose in this world , having a personal relationship with Christ and knowing what I want and look for in a relationship or with a man ....And now at 27 am can say that with confidence that I found my other personal person he is 35 and we have built a very stronger bond and connection because we know who we are On our own and what we expect from each other and where we are going in short we have a common mindset and we have same endgoals which is marriage and building a home together and we are happy.
Wow nice fr you. Am turning 23 october. I blv in my personality ..ppl view me as mature and strong woman. But sometimes i feel am not mature enough. Am in a situationship. A guy loves me he gives me every details abt him . he has a son 5yrs old. The guy is working.He says he loves me he wants me as a wife. I told him not any soon. He said he really needs to help me out and marry me. But no am really genuinely not ready getting married below 25or 26. So this guy is 32years old. He seems focused respinsible and hard working.. But not known him fr long. I stil do not feel if he can treat me as much as i want. Whenever i talk to my family abt him..no one suports it. My sister says he is just manupulating u wth wht he has achieved..lik he is nt serious he can marry u and later he will stop u from attaing wht ur dreams are. So am in confusion of wht th guy tells me and gives me details abt him self his family members,e.tc. ...i just wanna have fun wth him but not getting married to him any soon. Until i prepare pshycologycally n really know my strength in this life.Though maturity is not defined by age. But lol i just need time.
Thanks so much for this. This year I decided to embark on self discovery journey. I decided not to date. At some point I thought I am being weird. Am glad am not the first to yearn for deeper self understanding. I made the same mistake of dating early 🤣🤣. You have encouraged me.
Watching all the way from South Africa, I'm Zimbabwean, I'm 27 and I think this man just saved my life, I wish I could have known him sooner. Best lessons ever.
I have told people that it's a lie to say that you are staying in a bad relationship for children. Children know when their parents don't love each other and it affects them badly. That is short term thinking....thank you Benjamin.
Am 23 and thanks to God I got this special advice after my breakup last night....but from now on words am a different person thanks to Zulu and Joyce......love it so much....
I am a Malaysian and really enjoyed this talk. Benjamin is a very wise and speaks with a lot of knowledge and experience. Totally agree with his advice. God bless him!
Too true! I was lost at 23 am 26 now and its like i finally just woke up! Perspectives have shifted so much in such a short period of time and i will reclaim my shine!#its never too late.
I'm 24 and was feeling like i should be dating since everyone around me is either married, engaged or in a serious relationship, this dude just made me relax.
Maturity does not equate longevity...... I hv met 60 yrs old immature people. The ability to solve life issues with wisdom is complete maturity even if u r 17.But Benjamin has put it well that the specific part of brain that deals with emotions matures at 25.good show.
Can we have subtitles of the Swahili comments for some of us non Swahili speakers please -learning. (I feel left out on those minor yet important details) Asante. Love from South Africa🇿🇦
Click on the three-dot ellipsis on top right hand corner and then select 'Caption' then 'English auto generated' and you should see the english captions. Enjoy!
I just started to watch Benjamin Zulu three days ago and to be honest I just can't stop he is an inspiration to young people we need more men thinking like him the topics are great love the program I am a jamaican by birth but now am an American citizen
Benjamin Zulu you are amazing. There is something about the culture in east Africa is that it is old fashion and conservative which is excellent and I love it. From a sister from west Africa filling connect with my East African family. In fact I feel much more connected and belong to East Africa but never been there. Thanks so much from a sister from São Tomé and Príncipe island.
This guy is really making sense I once was in a relationship with a guy when I was 16 peer pressure that’s what I think it was alafu I got pregnant n I got a child so the guy was older he was 27 at that time 10 years down the line I feel so embarrassed of my choices back then but I thank God we didn’t get married coz it would have been hell on earth.This kind of topics should be done more to save girls lives coz we are the ones who suffer later
I am glad I am watching this now, I ha e just got out of a long distance relationship and I have no regrets. I am starting on a clean slate thank you jesus
What is tricky about waiting though is my experience is different being single over 40 I wish married before 26. Actually you don't have a husband packaged and waiting! The fatigue of dating and failing has been my experience!!!
So glad I found Benjamin's advice. I am still in my very early twenties and everything he is saying makes sense. Mainly on the dating part, the extra will surely put me well in the game.
Me too... I'm glad it clicked when I turned 20. Life's not all about just dating. I'm now 21 and so after finding my purpose and building something of my own during this time..
Did you know Benjamin Zulu is also one of the best fitness trainer in town...I miss your sessions Benja.... Joyce Mwaura you're also the best host keep it up shining 💕🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥💕
Fantastic time with Benjamin!!! Please I want Benjamin zulu to discuss the topic "Why do many men in their 50s and 60s in our society prefer girls in their early 20s?
@sharon most of these men are insecure with mature women who will challenge them and ask serious questions. Most of them are either divorced, widowed or separated. If not theyv been looking for finances . Others do it for society sake to prove they are still youthful.
😪😭😭😭when I was 19, I thought he loved me but he ate my mum’s money and played my heart silly .🥳Now I’m in upper 20’s and sane, he’s in 30’s still chasing me to see if I’m still foolish? Hahaaaaa, ngumu.
I don't completely agree with what he says. Maturity does not necessarily come with age but according to what one has been exposed to as they grow up. His theory will not work for everybody but a few so I would say know what is good for you and be led by the Holy Spirit 😉. Also dating late makes people desperate and will make the said mistakes cos of pressure from relatives, biological clock ticking etc. Cos rarely will one date the first person they meet so if you start at 26 and don't find the right guy how many will you pick to get Mr right. Also no one can say they know themselves fully at 25 cos learning of self is a lifelong continuous process. "My small sense"
I agree, maturity level is not dictated by age to some extent. Though he could be right in terms of emotional intelligence but not intelligence quotient
Yes you speak so much sense. A biggest asset a lady has is her youth. Not her degree or money etc. You said it yourself, age is a significant factor in all this. Starting at 26 gives a short window to find a suitable God fearing partner. If she is not gorgeous, she will struggle to find the partner she wishes. I urge all parents with daughtersr, Don't let them waste there youth. It is their most precious asset.
@Anne Sparks. Yes. I also believe he assumed that they didn't have sexual experiences before 25. In fact giving girls until 25 will just get them to heighten their body count. This is the true problem here that people are tiptoeing around.
he is 100% right.. i did the same mistakes, got made pregnant at 21 & didnt work out. at 27 another pregnant with a man.. dated him for 10 years another pregnant with him.. and after 13 years got separated & now at 40, single mom with 3 Kids...i wish i knew that better before.
Where was he when I was 20😭😭😭😭,,,,not too late I discovered him last year @24 and I am so happy I turned my life around.Now I'm 25 and he is right "the dawn of sanity" everything makes sense now.I know what I want and where I'm going
Joyce thank you so much for changing my life I was struggling with dating but after watching this interview things will surely change 💝💝💝God bless you guys
Where was this man when I was growing up. Anyway I'm dating now at 28years and loving the experience. Young people need Benjamin Zulu. The world needs Benjamin zulu. He is underrated.
Wow!! I love watching these interviews, Benjamin shares amazing information, he's so funny as well 🤣😂😄 Thank you Joyce for asking the right questions as well!
Some ladies (and gents sadly) forget mostly what is meant to be focused in with their life when at these ages. Focus on your personal development before rushing. @ 15:35
This interview was absolutely beautiful! I love how Benjamin answered concisely and Joyce said just their right number of things for him to answer to. The energy was also amiable.
We need a part two Joyce am enlightened just stepped out of my previous relationship and am 24. I need more light on this. Kudos Zulu wewe uliletwa na mungu aki
Always laughing at myself and other crazy mistakes people do. Benjamin always helping me learn and correct my mistakes. Joyce i laughed with you at the lady who in 3 months is already buying the inlaws expensive gifts
I’m 26 but I’m still doing theory for now🤣🤣 Waiting on God because I know the practical will be sweeter. Ladies don’t settle for less. Enjoy all the goodness in your singleness whilst developing and improving yourself then you’ll be able to attract the right person. Oh how I enjoyed the chat. Thank you Joyce and Mr Zulu for the great information and I love the humour alongside. God bless you. Greetings from Melbourne Australia🙏🏾😃
am 26 years and i understand myself better before , i didn't know what i wanted but now i can sit and be able o tell, with or without a man, Benjamin is right about a 26 year old woman understanding
In my 30's, no children and enjoying it, but society can make you feel like there is something wrong with you, but be matured enough even when they say " The clock is ticking " that should not worry you. Let avoid doing things for wrong reasons. Let set those standards high, if they can't marry a woman with 4 kids, why do we become stepmothers to 10 kids🙈 when we don't even have one child. Zulu is coaching us we really need to practice it, date for a purpose, what more can we ask for! Game on😂😂🤸♂️🤸♂️
I’m 36 and no child or wife, you can’t imagine the pressure. Luckily I live abroad so I only deal with my people when I call. I should settle within two years though
God bless you Benjamin I was almost getting into unhappy marriage because of the mistake I made, we got a baby.. the lady has been pressuring me to marry her and threatening me with curses
This is but the naked truth... me being a church girl got lured in dating while 24 by a man who approached and said that God spoke to him. 6 years down the line he left on the stage and is planning to settle down soon with another lady.. this he did unapologetically and i really wonder if God spoke to him to leave. I was left devastated and in state of confusion after investing a lot. My God it was the most painful experience guys but thanks to God who has healed me...now my eyes are opened and able to learn from my previous mistakes and ready to face the task ahead.
I wnat you to know that if it had really been the Lord, The lord would have told you too. The same God thats in you operates in someone else. How would his Holy spirit know, but yours doesnt... It doesn't happen that way, because its the same spirit. with that being said know that anyone who comes to you with a word from God/ The Holy Spirit should only be confirming what the spirit is telling you. I hope this is ministering to you! Be confident in your relationship with the lord and know that there are impostors! If your spirit doesn't know something they are claiming to know, their an impostor... The Holy spirit is God! even if you don't know( no matter where you are in your walk) God, and the Holy Spirit will know and will confirm it with you. I am sorry this happened to you!. As a sister in Christ I genuinely mean it when I say that this man is not what you have to look forward to from here on out. I don't believe it was Gods will per say That you relationship happened hence why only "his version of the Holy Spirit" was the only one who "knew". However God knew that this man was an impostor. Which is why he had to leave you let me tell you God looks out for us, I know it doesn't seem like it but the Lord did not let that impostor stay in your life even when you wanted him to. Most importantly even if it wasnt Gods will God wants to use hurts, mistakes, misunderstandings as stepping stone and to teach us. Trust the God in you, and stay stead fast in your walk with Christ! much love, and I will be praying for your healing! You Got this led the Holy spirit lead YOU
@@AriannaSimoneTaylor wow am happy girl. i am a youth minister ever since i got saved in class 5 i never looked back. i have been destroying the kingdom of darkness by preaching sexual purity,,, so God knew i didn't deserve hypocrites. we went to same church together but different branches; same December youth conventions mmm so this is somebody i believed to have been born again. i had two confirmations about the guy but apparently cant understand what happened along the way. thanks dear for such powerful words. blessings
@@sheilalukoz6347 my dear i invested financially at their home and in him,, he even left with debts yet telling the new catch that he told me he was done with me something he refused to say to date. i thank our Lord and saviour Jesus Christ our comforter and i clearly remember the words of prophet TB JOSHUA " better is not enough, the best is yet to com" God knows what is best for us, we only need to wait as the process may take long. one thing i thank God for, i have never felt bitterness nor hating men coz i know there still many good men out there. siz build a strong relationship with GOD.
Am 23yrs and this all I wanted to hear..Too much confusion, feeling emotional fatigued already..but atleast I now know what to do Thanks Joyce and Benjamin
I have been learning alot from Benjamin ,since I bumped on his talk on RUclips . Thanks alot and May the Almighty God continue blessing you each and every days of your life.
Love is not a sprint. It’s a long slow walk. There are many stages of development necessary to build solid foundations. Too many couples rush into certain territories far too soon and negatively impact the direction and outcome of their relationships.
Most relationships never recover from these mistakes. On this episode, Benjamin Zulu outlines common and very costly mistakes that all dating couples should avoid. Do not forget to subscribe to our RUclips channel.. Click here to subscribe -- ruclips.net/user/switchtvkenya
So nice. ..heart warming
Hahahaha hahaha
Aki you people are hillarious today
Date with a purpose great advice !!
Truth
This dude is out here saving lives. What he's saying is so true.
Talk of wisdom😨.
Absolutely!
In a humorous way
Very true.marriage needs lots of advice
Naked truth indeed
"Dont fall in love with him before u get his assurance...dont be afraid to lose him or he will take u in on his own terms n not on ur own terms..DATE WITH PURPOSE ,FOR WOMEN"-that hit me hard
Here is a summary of what has been mentioned :
1)Dating too soon, before 25
2)Dating for way too long (when it goes over 2 years, you’re wasting your time)
‼️The man pursues but the woman determines the standard‼️
3)Don’t commit too soon (eg.getting pregant)
4)Don’t involve so many people in your relationship
Thanks
Sure the woman to determine the standards makes sense
I totally agree with number 2
Thank you!
Thanks darling
I'm 32 yr old lady dating a 37 yr old....my career path came late in life at 29yrs feel like it's never late...love the show👏🔥👍
God bless the woman that birthed Zulu
I just had a break up yesterday and trust me this talk really helped me big time . I feel like my spirit is free.
Sorry for the breakup doll. You'll be okay
Sorry babe 🥰...he’s lost a good thing
Sorry doll hope you are better now
Hugs girl
Waah, take time
I got lost at 23 wow, ended up pregnant...these things i must teach my baby when she grows
Just like me here bt we shall teach our kids these things
My story
All will be well
The media also helps to confuse young people.
Good luck to both of you!
24 and still confused. Benjamin you're so right about that age thing
Not relly mamaa
😂😂😂😂Woishe I feel us
"it's not the man or the woman you marry that gives you the greatest happiness, it's achieving your purpose in life!" those deep words need to be shouted much louder to a society obsessed with romanticized relationships and love while paying less attention to self care and self purpose. Thank you Benjamin! Love from Nigeria!
You said it
This guy is special. Shout out from South Africa. One love
Lennon Syre Mamhare Fellow South African 🇿🇦
Am turning 21,and the point on 'don't get in love before assurance', this was for me for real😭, I'm now thinking of concentrating on my books, get my 1st class degree, build my life in this short 4years,thanks Benjamin for the talk, Girls hope tumeskia
I feel like he is right am almost turning 26 and I discovered myself just when I turned 25 and knew the kind of people I want around...
Heeeh this guy I love this sanaa
Can I have Candy's number
True I feel like I can see properly now after I turned 25
Thank you Benjamin.....I fully agree with what you’re saying....I made the same mistakes of Dating early when I was on the age of 19 to 25 and it never worked until I took time for myself to learn and understand who I really am as a person ,my purpose in this world , having a personal relationship with Christ and knowing what I want and look for in a relationship or with a man ....And now at 27 am can say that with confidence that I found my other personal person he is 35 and we have built a very stronger bond and connection because we know who we are On our own and what we expect from each other and where we are going in short we have a common mindset and we have same endgoals which is marriage and building a home together and we are happy.
Wow nice fr you. Am turning 23 october. I blv in my personality ..ppl view me as mature and strong woman. But sometimes i feel am not mature enough. Am in a situationship. A guy loves me he gives me every details abt him . he has a son 5yrs old. The guy is working.He says he loves me he wants me as a wife. I told him not any soon. He said he really needs to help me out and marry me. But no am really genuinely not ready getting married below 25or 26. So this guy is 32years old. He seems focused respinsible and hard working.. But not known him fr long. I stil do not feel if he can treat me as much as i want. Whenever i talk to my family abt him..no one suports it. My sister says he is just manupulating u wth wht he has achieved..lik he is nt serious he can marry u and later he will stop u from attaing wht ur dreams are. So am in confusion of wht th guy tells me and gives me details abt him self his family members,e.tc. ...i just wanna have fun wth him but not getting married to him any soon. Until i prepare pshycologycally n really know my strength in this life.Though maturity is not defined by age. But lol i just need time.
Wow, this is the exact same thing that happened to me. I am happy with where I am right now and having to date with my mind and heart very sober.
@@phostinemulongo9051 give it time
and make sure you don't lose a good man
Thanks so much for this. This year I decided to embark on self discovery journey. I decided not to date. At some point I thought I am being weird. Am glad am not the first to yearn for deeper self understanding.
I made the same mistake of dating early 🤣🤣.
You have encouraged me.
@@phostinemulongo9051 you're too young to start baby mama dramas please.It's not easy
Watching all the way from South Africa, I'm Zimbabwean, I'm 27 and I think this man just saved my life, I wish I could have known him sooner. Best lessons ever.
My Zimbabwean sis how are you . Benjamin anotaura shuwa
Patricia you are my home girl...
True indeed wish i had watched this and gotten this advice sooner
I have told people that it's a lie to say that you are staying in a bad relationship for children. Children know when their parents don't love each other and it affects them badly. That is short term thinking....thank you Benjamin.
YOU ARE BRILIANT BENJAMIN .IRENE IN UK
Am 23 and thanks to God I got this special advice after my breakup last night....but from now on words am a different person thanks to Zulu and Joyce......love it so much....
Wish I had this information before the mistakes I made in life...anyways...still learning..before planning to date or settle...amazing information
Benjamin zulu a blessing to our world!!!!
U can say it again!!
Truest
Yes I agree with every word!
I am a Malaysian and really enjoyed this talk. Benjamin is a very wise and speaks with a lot of knowledge and experience. Totally agree with his advice. God bless him!
Too true! I was lost at 23 am 26 now and its like i finally just woke up! Perspectives have shifted so much in such a short period of time and i will reclaim my shine!#its never too late.
I woke up at 27.after 5 years dating. Gosh... Believe me i was coming from a dream.
Dont fall in love before you get the assurance that he is the one....i have already fallen in love
I'm 24 and was feeling like i should be dating since everyone around me is either married, engaged or in a serious relationship, this dude just made me relax.
Me too
Same....was feeling left out and lonely but thanks to Zulu sitaki kuwa married till I sort my life
Am addicted to this channel...i hope thats a good thing
Maturity does not equate longevity...... I hv met 60 yrs old immature people. The ability to solve life issues with wisdom is complete maturity even if u r 17.But Benjamin has put it well that the specific part of brain that deals with emotions matures at 25.good show.
Topic ya maturity issa whole episode Zulu needs to tackle 😂
We are in class, with Benj as a lecturer and we learn something new from every session. Thank you for this empowering program
Can we have subtitles of the Swahili comments for some of us non Swahili speakers please -learning. (I feel left out on those minor yet important details) Asante. Love from South Africa🇿🇦
TheZandiey Hello fellow SA 🇿🇦 I agree with you with subtitles
Click on the three-dot ellipsis on top right hand corner and then select 'Caption' then 'English auto generated' and you should see the english captions. Enjoy!
Thanks for asking for all non Swahili speakers
I am sorted too
Thiza ndim lowo oba lost. Thank you for raising that
I thought the African union told all the African ls should learn swahili!!
"Don't fall in love before Assurance''..🔥🔥🔥
I just started to watch Benjamin Zulu three days ago and to be honest I just can't stop he is an inspiration to young people we need more men thinking like him the topics are great love the program I am a jamaican by birth but now am an American citizen
Benjamin Zulu you are amazing. There is something about the culture in east Africa is that it is old fashion and conservative which is excellent and I love it. From a sister from west Africa filling connect with my East African family. In fact I feel much more connected and belong to East Africa but never been there. Thanks so much from a sister from São Tomé and Príncipe island.
Very true before 25 find ur self ,love ur self, add value to ur self,the regrets will be less
This guy is really making sense I once was in a relationship with a guy when I was 16 peer pressure that’s what I think it was alafu I got pregnant n I got a child so the guy was older he was 27 at that time 10 years down the line I feel so embarrassed of my choices back then but I thank God we didn’t get married coz it would have been hell on earth.This kind of topics should be done more to save girls lives coz we are the ones who suffer later
Embarrassed
In Kenya Law that man defiled you and should be doing his 25 year Jail term still
Am at 23yrs and trust me am totally confused but hey Benjamin u just a blessing in my life
Lol..me too turning23
I am glad I am watching this now, I ha e just got out of a long distance relationship and I have no regrets. I am starting on a clean slate thank you jesus
me too
In a long distance relationship dont know what to say.
Ouh the same here
What is tricky about waiting though is my experience is different being single over 40 I wish married before 26. Actually you don't have a husband packaged and waiting! The fatigue of dating and failing has been my experience!!!
It's truly exhausting.
I believe it's necessary to take a break when fatigued and get back when better.
3verything happens for a reason ...some people marry at 50 and end up getting patners for life
Same WhatsApp
Benjamin has really changed me from his talks.. I love you two.
So glad I found Benjamin's advice. I am still in my very early twenties and everything he is saying makes sense. Mainly on the dating part, the extra will surely put me well in the game.
Me too...
I'm glad it clicked when I turned 20.
Life's not all about just dating.
I'm now 21 and so after finding my purpose and building something of my own during this time..
Me too... I'm here and I'm learning so much.I feel like I've already kick-started my purposeful journey
Did you know Benjamin Zulu is also one of the best fitness trainer in town...I miss your sessions Benja.... Joyce Mwaura you're also the best host keep it up shining 💕🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥💕
Please, Benjamin you must write a book.
For sure he should
I second that
I second that
Very true
Surely
Fantastic time with Benjamin!!! Please I want Benjamin zulu to discuss the topic "Why do many men in their 50s and 60s in our society prefer girls in their early 20s?
Are you asking why fathers are eating their daughters?
Are you one of them or asking for someone
Am a woman. Just surprised how such men marry little girls.
@sharon most of these men are insecure with mature women who will challenge them and ask serious questions. Most of them are either divorced, widowed or separated. If not theyv been looking for finances . Others do it for society sake to prove they are still youthful.
Men are more sexually active at this age so they engagement in young who seems to be active too
😪😭😭😭when I was 19, I thought he loved me but he ate my mum’s money and played my heart silly .🥳Now I’m in upper 20’s and sane, he’s in 30’s still chasing me to see if I’m still foolish? Hahaaaaa, ngumu.
Yes am 21 in campus n exploring my passion in wigs n I feel like am on the right track
We the same, let's move
The man is so real ...watching from Ghana 🇬🇭
I don't completely agree with what he says. Maturity does not necessarily come with age but according to what one has been exposed to as they grow up. His theory will not work for everybody but a few so I would say know what is good for you and be led by the Holy Spirit 😉. Also dating late makes people desperate and will make the said mistakes cos of pressure from relatives, biological clock ticking etc. Cos rarely will one date the first person they meet so if you start at 26 and don't find the right guy how many will you pick to get Mr right. Also no one can say they know themselves fully at 25 cos learning of self is a lifelong continuous process. "My small sense"
True. Example is Barbie and bobi kyagulanye in Uganda started dating in teens and are still together and are very happy
I agree, maturity level is not dictated by age to some extent. Though he could be right in terms of emotional intelligence but not intelligence quotient
Yes you speak so much sense. A biggest asset a lady has is her youth. Not her degree or money etc. You said it yourself, age is a significant factor in all this. Starting at 26 gives a short window to find a suitable God fearing partner. If she is not gorgeous, she will struggle to find the partner she wishes. I urge all parents with daughtersr, Don't let them waste there youth. It is their most precious asset.
@Anne Sparks what do you mean when you say underage. Is it below 18? IMO a suitable advisor is you father or an older male. Your mum, not so much.
@Anne Sparks. Yes. I also believe he assumed that they didn't have sexual experiences before 25. In fact giving girls until 25 will just get them to heighten their body count. This is the true problem here that people are tiptoeing around.
he is 100% right.. i did the same mistakes, got made pregnant at 21 & didnt work out. at 27 another pregnant with a man.. dated him for 10 years another pregnant with him.. and after 13 years got separated & now at 40, single mom with 3 Kids...i wish i knew that better before.
Don’t worry Love, it shall be well with you. God has an amazing plan for you, information is power!
Wueh!
Hugs girl 🤗. Children are a blessing from God so count yourself blessed. Get up, dress up and be ready to reclaim your shine!!
Where was he when I was 20😭😭😭😭,,,,not too late I discovered him last year @24 and I am so happy I turned my life around.Now I'm 25 and he is right "the dawn of sanity" everything makes sense now.I know what I want and where I'm going
Joyce thank you so much for changing my life I was struggling with dating but after watching this interview things will surely change 💝💝💝God bless you guys
Where was this man when I was growing up. Anyway I'm dating now at 28years and loving the experience. Young people need Benjamin Zulu. The world needs Benjamin zulu. He is underrated.
i m 31years and I married 24yers and we have one girl and I'm happy.
Wow!! I love watching these interviews, Benjamin shares amazing information, he's so funny as well 🤣😂😄 Thank you Joyce for asking the right questions as well!
Some ladies (and gents sadly) forget mostly what is meant to be focused in with their life when at these ages. Focus on your personal development before rushing. @ 15:35
This changed my life..I love his talks😍💕❤️
This guy speaks for me. These are things I badly want ma youth to learn.
I hate it when they interrupt him while speaking OMG! This guy is too good yhoooo. He needs his own channel
This interview was absolutely beautiful! I love how Benjamin answered concisely and Joyce said just their right number of things for him to answer to. The energy was also amiable.
I agree 25 is the right time.
Lesson learnt for the mentoring of my daughter.
I've been seeing this every time I'm on RUclips and I'm like aa I'll watch later but I don't regret..no dating until 25🤧🤗
Iam lucky to be 25 and 3months old to hear this 😘😘thank you sir and Joyce for the show
We need a part two Joyce am enlightened just stepped out of my previous relationship and am 24. I need more light on this. Kudos Zulu wewe uliletwa na mungu aki
True
I like this show .... Am Zimbabwean but l am learning a lot of things from you guys .... l salute you Sir 😊😊😊😊🙌🏾
Always laughing at myself and other crazy mistakes people do. Benjamin always helping me learn and correct my mistakes. Joyce i laughed with you at the lady who in 3 months is already buying the inlaws expensive gifts
God bless ths guy....dude saving ppl's lives out here so really
I’m 26 but I’m still doing theory for now🤣🤣 Waiting on God because I know the practical will be sweeter. Ladies don’t settle for less. Enjoy all the goodness in your singleness whilst developing and improving yourself then you’ll be able to attract the right person. Oh how I enjoyed the chat. Thank you Joyce and Mr Zulu for the great information and I love the humour alongside. God bless you. Greetings from Melbourne Australia🙏🏾😃
💪💪I agree with you I'm also 26 single without a child and I'm not in rush yet
I just love this guy,his talks makes me call myself a meeting
Omw, if u studied medicine for seven years and became a DJ, this comparison is on point😂😂😂👏
The comparison indeed is 💯 on point😂😂😂
Also a BTS stan✨✨
Army💜💜💜
am 26 years and i understand myself better before , i didn't know what i wanted but now i can sit and be able o tell, with or without a man, Benjamin is right about a 26 year old woman understanding
14:35 I like how he answered the statement the woman made about marrying at 23. That was excellent!
I can't help but keep saying YES to everything you say, YES , you're truly making total sense
In my 30's, no children and enjoying it, but society can make you feel like there is something wrong with you, but be matured enough even when they say " The clock is ticking " that should not worry you. Let avoid doing things for wrong reasons. Let set those standards high, if they can't marry a woman with 4 kids, why do we become stepmothers to 10 kids🙈 when we don't even have one child. Zulu is coaching us we really need to practice it, date for a purpose, what more can we ask for! Game on😂😂🤸♂️🤸♂️
My dear no pressure I am 30 no kids and love myself like that.Children will come later.
@@prisillakimani3590 Yeah God has his way of doing things. 🤸♂️🤸♂️🤸♂️💃💃💃
Team 30 with no kids 😅
I’m 36 and no child or wife, you can’t imagine the pressure. Luckily I live abroad so I only deal with my people when I call. I should settle within two years though
@@TonnyOkello At 36 and you are matured enough to make the right decisions, that's good.All the best bro👏👏
God bless you Benjamin I was almost getting into unhappy marriage because of the mistake I made, we got a baby.. the lady has been pressuring me to marry her and threatening me with curses
This guy is so true. OMG, thank you so much. It's like I was receiving free counselling session.
I love this guy!! ongeza volume hapo pa self-development before 25.
I love this,, am 26n not think of getting married soon,,, i second Benjamin words,, taking tym
Hmm.. really
Pamoja dada. I am 26 and not in the rush.
Dont be wifened before you are a wife....only do wifely duties for your husband
💯
never ever do wifey shit for no man before he walked you down the aisle and called you wife before the altar
So true...
Hear, hear!
hay hyo ni Kali mwaaaah
The description of the ages is quite true. At 23 I was very lost.
me right now
Same sis 😂😂😂 same, I just turned 24 a few months ago and I can clearly see the difference of last year me, and this year me.
Me too , at 23 , l was totally confused,
Me too dear
Me too..I am 23 and I think am totally lost..Thank you for reviving my spirit❤
Young people are really rushing into relationships.
Wisdom is you portion Coach Zulu. Thanks a lot! Can we have subtitles please?
Communication,and progress is the best sign your man is ready for a relationship
Very correct
Wish men were more candid and straightforward the games can be boring . Others still play within marriages.
I Just turned 25 last month.Wow...and I feel am ready to settle now koz am done with my campus studies.
Mami, ready to date... not settle.
Date with a job or career sister
This is but the naked truth... me being a church girl got lured in dating while 24 by a man who approached and said that God spoke to him. 6 years down the line he left on the stage and is planning to settle down soon with another lady.. this he did unapologetically and i really wonder if God spoke to him to leave. I was left devastated and in state of confusion after investing a lot. My God it was the most painful experience guys but thanks to God who has healed me...now my eyes are opened and able to learn from my previous mistakes and ready to face the task ahead.
Wow...swthrt may God have mercy on you...am in your shoes
I wnat you to know that if it had really been the Lord, The lord would have told you too. The same God thats in you operates in someone else. How would his Holy spirit know, but yours doesnt... It doesn't happen that way, because its the same spirit. with that being said know that anyone who comes to you with a word from God/ The Holy Spirit should only be confirming what the spirit is telling you. I hope this is ministering to you! Be confident in your relationship with the lord and know that there are impostors! If your spirit doesn't know something they are claiming to know, their an impostor... The Holy spirit is God! even if you don't know( no matter where you are in your walk) God, and the Holy Spirit will know and will confirm it with you. I am sorry this happened to you!. As a sister in Christ I genuinely mean it when I say that this man is not what you have to look forward to from here on out. I don't believe it was Gods will per say That you relationship happened hence why only "his version of the Holy Spirit" was the only one who "knew". However God knew that this man was an impostor. Which is why he had to leave you let me tell you God looks out for us, I know it doesn't seem like it but the Lord did not let that impostor stay in your life even when you wanted him to. Most importantly even if it wasnt Gods will God wants to use hurts, mistakes, misunderstandings as stepping stone and to teach us. Trust the God in you, and stay stead fast in your walk with Christ! much love, and I will be praying for your healing! You Got this led the Holy spirit lead YOU
@@AriannaSimoneTaylor wow am happy girl. i am a youth minister ever since i got saved in class 5 i never looked back. i have been destroying the kingdom of darkness by preaching sexual purity,,, so God knew i didn't deserve hypocrites. we went to same church together but different branches; same December youth conventions mmm so this is somebody i believed to have been born again. i had two confirmations about the guy but apparently cant understand what happened along the way. thanks dear for such powerful words. blessings
@@sheilalukoz6347 my dear i invested financially at their home and in him,, he even left with debts yet telling the new catch that he told me he was done with me something he refused to say to date. i thank our Lord and saviour Jesus Christ our comforter and i clearly remember the words of prophet TB JOSHUA " better is not enough, the best is yet to com" God knows what is best for us, we only need to wait as the process may take long. one thing i thank God for, i have never felt bitterness nor hating men coz i know there still many good men out there. siz build a strong relationship with GOD.
Am 23yrs and this all I wanted to hear..Too much confusion, feeling emotional fatigued already..but atleast I now know what to do Thanks Joyce and Benjamin
Same here..exactly what I'm going through
I agree with the 25 advice. My mom always told me this as well.
wululululu benjamin u are the best......joyce stay on...........this is so good......who else is watching from uganda
I'm watching from SA, I love the show..
Ohhh me too...
I have learned a lot from Benjamin.
If all African men can look this way oh we Kenyan ladies will never regret
Apo kwa dating for too long its true... Am a victim n now happily married after dating for 8months....
I am a victim of marrying at 22.....and making a big mistake in that case....
Am 30 ,i wish i saw this when 20 ,have ruined my life you are sooo true
Hey Gladys it's never too late. You are still so young. Discover yourself first.
You are still young.Just stand up,Dust yourself and move on wiser.God bless
I have been learning alot from Benjamin ,since I bumped on his talk on RUclips . Thanks alot and May the Almighty God continue blessing you each and every days of your life.
"Men have a precious ability to dettach" IS TRICKYYY
4:17 I'm 23 and what Mr. Zulu said is so true.
Thank you zulu. From these talks I am able to see dating at a very different plate
Am 23 and totally feel like he is talking about me
Is true I was dated for 7yrs and we never married each other.
I love what I'm hearing."other pple study medicine for 7yrs and became DJs "It killed me 😃😃😃
But that's so True,that killed me too 🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Me too 😂😂
That was also my favorite part🤣,Educative yet so hilourious😂😂
😂😂😂
Eish I wish I knew this b4 turning 25. I'm 26 now but still I will use this information.
Love from South Africa🇿🇦
I'm loving the advice and tips I'm getting here👏🏼🤸🏽♀️
Benjamin Zulu, please write a book 😢😭
Benjamin Zulu is the voice for the youth when it comes to relationships. Joyce Omondi is a fantastic beautiful host. I am hooked to this duo.
I thank you for having him on. I have been devouring all of his videos, for he dispenses such good advice.
This man is treasure
Mr Zulu you are blessing for sure ....following you from Zimbabwe
Thank u Mr Benjamin🙏🙏 watching from Botswana🇧🇼🇧🇼🇧🇼