I never really feel compelled to share my face on the internet but I REALLY want to make a response video to this... I was super pleased to see that this turned into a sort of anti-social-media/anti-consumption message, an enlightenment for viewers who I really hope take it seriously. This is something I realised when I deleted Instagram, and just turned my back on consuming constant imagery and information about fashion. I like to watch a few fashion vids here and there on RUclips, its something I'm passionate about so I'm not interested in completely cutting it out, but for my own wellbeing I've had to just turn away from all of the influencers. I'm 23, and so many of my peers constantly share their newest status symbol pieces on social media, for me it sent me into a FOMO-induced frenzy, I started consuming like crazy, and for someone with impulse issues it was a big problem. I really compensated for my crippling self hatred through buying the most coveted pieces I could possibly get my hands on, for some sort of social status. It was exhausting. And not very rewarding. I never felt truly like myself in these clothes. And even now, following whats cool at the moment, I really do like a lot of the 'trendy' styles people wear. A lot of popular fashion pieces are really sick, I can appreciate them, but without the influence of social media and constantly seeing it on other people, I no longer feel the need to buy into it or be part of it. When I look in my wardrobe, and I'm currently doing a huge purge, the clothes I really reach for are actually very simple pieces. They make me feel comfortable. They make me feel confident. To me it's less about the item and more about the overall image. It's about knowing that a certain colour does not look good on me, no matter how sick the graphic is, or how much the brand is worth. It's about knowing what kind of 'self' I am presenting when I'm wearing it, and if it truly represents who I am and where I'm at with my life. Because there is a real world outside of social media. And the constant need to keep up with trends is a tireless and expensive task that I am no longer interested in participating in. Through all of this, I don't think I've compromised on 'style'. There is a certain 'look' I'm going for, a 'silhouette' I want to achieve, but what I love about it is it's particular, and I've become a lot more picky about what I want to bring into my life to create that look, and it's not influenced by anyone telling me what to love, and where to shop it. It's all luck based, I buy exclusively second hand, and I've avoided going online for it too because often the prices are just completely unreasonable. So it feels more special this way. Anyway I could go on. This is why I want to make a response video, but I'm not a RUclipsr or anything, and I don't have editing skills. But yeah just wanted to share my personal experience with this. Fashion exists outside of the online trend bubble. And to me, that fashion is way more interesting. It's about real life people.
toxic positivity can also very be annoying whenever ur looking for actual advice and people just say something like 'oh you look fine'. yeah ok but that's not the point. because this has happened quite a few times I also just feel like an asshole now whenever they ask me and I do give criticism or whenever I want to give someone criticism in general. I'd say as long as you're respectful and try to be constructive, you're most likely good but it's hard to follow my own advice sometimes.
I don’t think everyone wants to be a fashion critic or wants everyone else to evaluate their choice of clothes. 99% of people dont care and from the 99% that care and have knowledge dont care enough to critique everyone around them. Everyone thats really into fashion understands that its just a petty rich people thing like most high art. Its not that serious.
Hey man just wanna say as a reminder for how harsh we can be on ourselves: i literally wouldnt have noticed the pimple unless you pointed it out. You look like a normal person, because everyone gets them.
another aspect of social media that imo takes away from fashion is the loss of physicality. even when they show you textures and whatnot holding the physical piece of clothing and appreciating it as an actual unique object (not as part of a brand or as a signifier of something else) is a very enjoyable part of fashion. owning too much stuff also takes away from this. thinking of your clothes as your little collection of unique objects you put on your body is a perspective that has given me a lotttt to introspect. you start deriving value from the individual history of each item, decontextualize it, transform it , and then either wear it to death of pass it on as something even more unique
i actually needed this sm thank you for this, i’ve been getting so upset at myself lately bc i feel as if i lost all my knowledge in myself when it comes to my style bc of the amount of media my brain has consumed and getting sucked into the trends that’s everyone is doing. im trying so hard to find myself in this all over again but this reminded me to just disconnect to reconnect
I love how you can explain these things in a way that is semi serious so you actually get something from it but It doesn't get boring. I feel like fashion at the moment especially for people getting into it is a mine field to actually find quality style but it's definetly possible to find if you just research it enough and find what you actually like instead of just copying an average grwm
Fashion takes time but also as you get older your relationship to fashion changes. In highschool it was easy to wear heels because I’d only walk short distances and sit most of the day, but now I’m unable to wear what I want because I’m likely running errands, out with friends, or at work and these responsibilities alter what you are willing to wear. Especially when other people don’t appreciate fashion in the same way they make get upset about u wearing uncomfortable heels because it’s forcing you to walk slower or wastes time to go and change shoes. While ideally I’d be wearing rlly over the top fits and clothes that cause some discomfort for the visual, it is not realistic for my life and those around me and so it’s altered my style to see what I’m willing to do. I’m trying to overcome these frustrations to enjoy clothes as much as I did when I was younger but unless you’re a celeb or influencer it’s unlikely to pursue fashion to the full extent the lot of us would like.
Completely agree. I'm (just) in my forties, love fashion. Not in a particularly cool way but really enjoy it. But yes lifestyle bears influence, slim (dare I say skinny) jeans/trousers or knee length loose skirts/shorts suited my commute cycling into work. Being older I've also a couple of maxi or long midi straight skirts (that I have for a long time and ahead of current trends) that i love but again if cycling don't work. Also I slopped around on the wet streets of Dublin in long trousers in college so can't return to that style! I'm also a mother so comfort and durability is needed. Now I try to incorporate my "special" items (usually a really good coat or jacket) into a pretty functionary (perhaps boring) style to help me feel nice!
honestly, I've never thought that the best personal advice to self-development would come from your mouth. I've watched and read a lot of self-development, psychology, performance and etc. and really, you could just summarize in 20 minutes what every single one of that coaches out there try to distort for their own gains.
remember that life isnt just performance and maximizing your effectiveness. Thats a neoliberal and modernist stupid idea that is driving people to burnouts or suicides daily
the last video I watched tonight and this has caused me a lot of thinkingggg how am i gonna sleep now. Generally, this has been extremely helpful as I have noticed that I am becoming more and more detached w some aspects in fashion in social media. Im actually trying to go back with print/ books. That semi quietness is what I’m yearning for lately. ❤
This last part is great advice! Having self reflection on why we make certain decisions is really important. The internet sorta makes it seem unfair, how everyone else has such cool fits and shit.. when in reality they likely have all the same negative thoughts and struggles that people who don't post do. I think for me sort of taking a more conceptual approach to inspiration helps, rather than wanting to dress in a certain style, I am trying to decide what I want based on why that aesthetic quality speaks to me. If I could describe how I want to dress, it'd sound like post-punk meets hyperpop. This to me is very challenging to try and interpolate abstract feelings into what the clothing communicates -which is why I enjoy fashion.
I would love to see some outfit reviews/breakdowns by you, talking about what works and doesn't work, how this or that outfit make use of the different elements of fashion, etc!
What i really like about you is that you always tell us the right advice in a way that isn’t toxic or frustrating it is really important for me to take advice when i feel good about it it’s never okay to take a toxic advice even if its true i will always try to learn from you
Damn very well said. I feel lve been going though this process of introspection quite a lot recently and I’m reflecting more and more and consuming less and less, but the fashion community makes you want to believe that you are only a part of it when you buy one of your grails atleast every 2/3 Months (I’m exaggerating to make a point, but you know what I’m talking about) and I couldn’t really pinpoint why I felt like I wasn’t really part of a community. That really helped me, so thank you!
i have deleted instagram, discord, tik tok etc.. for almost a year now. and after learnt more and did what i liked. perused my passion! honestly at first it was hard but i recommend doin it. also love ur vid
17:29 same thing with rooms/ people/ lifestyles Tiktok so consistently gives us unrealistic expectations we feel we should be on par with. Ultimately at least for me i put my self down a lot and ran my pockets instead of just living life and finding cool finds over time.
I really liked this video! I want to ask: something you mention in this video is "the normie outfit". You have made a videos in the past about timeless wardrobes. To clarify, do you define "normie outfits" as outfits that are basic/you would construct if all you have is the basic/timeless wardrobe and nothing else (defining the normie outfit could be a fun short video)? Another question: what does useful criticism look like for someone who is just in the stages of building a timeless wardrobe and is not necessarily venturing into specific genres/aesthetics yet? Additionally, how does one parse out useful criticism to criticism that may not be as helpful? For example, if someone's current goal with fashion is to find clothes that they feel good in as it relates to body image, how should they value criticism about things like the sillhouette of a piece versus the colors being chosen for an outfit? Overall, I really like the content and I think I am learning a lot more about fashion! This channel is great at facilitating me learning about the kind of fashion I like!
I’ve watched all of ur videos and I loved every single one of it. I really want to start building a nice wardrobe but since I live in germany ordering things outside of the EU is so pricey bc the EU has these high ass duties you have to pay for. I always look at myself and feel the need to improve my style but I find it very difficult to have a starting point, I know that you should start with building a wardrobe of basics and essentials but I don’t really know where to find them since ordering from outside of the EU is so expensive. Thrifting also isn’t an option since I live in the Middleton nowhere basically.
i love the internet. in a sense, it has been my most consistent companion throughout adolescence and into adulthood. but i'm beginning to realize that i must let go, i must let go, i must let go. i must. i am so, so stagnant.
What is the ideal place on one's style In a scale from wearing clothes as a form of self expression or as art to wearing clothes just to look presentable and seek validation from other people ? Beacuse lets be honest I wont be able to wear head to toe yohji for a job interview or wedding. What should one do such in such scenerios ? Should one just suck it up and wear normy clothers for some scenarios and wear your own style when appropriate (which is very subjective )or try to incorporate your self expression and make it work ?
I’d say you can wear full Yohji to a wedding if you wanted to a lot of his stuff is formal but if there’s a dress code I’d need a specific formal wear then I’d assume you’d have to follow that
This is easy fix. Just wear 80% "normie" and change up 1 aspect of your fit. Like for example, make your shoes and accessories interesting. Or change up just ur coat or pant. Then u can start learning to incorporate stylized pieces into your daily style and test the boundaries of what is acceptable.
@@possumbossom No, just going loosely by percentages would be a mistake. That's how you experiment with your style personally, not how you dress for a role.
@@tal4466 80% is just a rando number i threw out. I meant to dress majority appropriate for the role. But if you still want to express yourself, you can do so incognito by incorporating 1 quirky element seamlessly into your otherwise normal fit. Trust me, people will still notice if you play around with subtle differences whether in color, style, or silhouette. Fashion is trial and error and error is where you learn.
As a man and a guitarist who came of age in the era of bands like The Fall of Troy and The Blood Brothers, overly form -fitting skin tight pants are all I’m really comfortable wearing even though I know I could look “better” in other cuts. Love the content man, I really appreciate your sincerity
A lot of these concepts are applicable to all areas of our individual lives (been trying to do so myself for a while, it's hard but rewarding on the long term:) I found your channel recently and instantly loved it keep it up!!
Fashion is expression. Teste ia subjective. If I dislike your clothes it doesn't matter. But we can always have a discusion about If your outfit comunicantes what you want to express.
I think where this video loses me or goes wrong is the idea of growth as a good thing; whether in how you use it in the case of growth in personal style or growth/change in fashion. Growth in terms of style isn't always good if you find a way of dress that you feel like accurately communicates who you are or what you want to say or are comfortable in how you dress then growth isn't necessary. Vice versa if you do want to change or grow your style because you enjoy that change or feel as if you aren't fully communicating what you want with how you dress that too is perfectly fine. Ultimately I think growth in the realm of style doesn't have an inherent value it is neither inherently good or bad rather it is up to the individual whether they want to grow or feel as if they need to grow. Because of this I disagree with your idea that its wrong to hide behind subjectivity and that criticism is important across the board, because it is perfectly fine to say I'm comfortable with how I dress and I understand why you might not like the way I dress but that doesn't mean I have to change. Furthermore, I think there are other ways to discuss style than critique, you can instead inquire as to why someone dresses the way they do and what they are trying to communicate by dressing that way. Because of this I also disagree with the point that hiding behind subjectivity and saying "that's just ur opinion" stops discussion; because there are other conversations around someones style that can be discussed besides good and bad outfit or like and dislike. I also think in terms of personal style, many times these conversations, around what someone intends with how they dress, can be more productive in refining/changeing/growing style than criticism. That's not to say criticism is bad either, sometimes people seek or open themselves up to criticism because they want to discuss their style in that way. BUT, it is not hiding or being toxically positive if you don't care for critique/ want critique on how you dress if you don't want to change how u dress; there is nothing inherently wrong or toxically positive about that. I just think it isn't (always) toxically positive to say someones critique is subjective as a reason for not changing your style; you can simply disagree with them.
ie just because criticism is different than hate doesn't mean criticism is always warranted. because growth in style isn't mandatory or inherently good. just because criticism can lead to growth doesn't mean criticism is always warranted because not everyone wants to grow/ needs to grow their style.
I agree that criticism is needed for growth and development(with toxic positivity being a very real and inherent problem, especially on social media platforms). Still, I think part of this argument fails to acknowledge that not everyone who participates in fashion is actively trying to further themselves or improve in a particular sort of manner(whether that is by improving their style, increasing their general knowledge, or even trying to use their platform to educate others). As we come to this singularity in which fashion exists in all states; from tiktok trend riders to archivebeasts to the avant-garde specialists that are pushing the boundaries of the space, I believe fashion, as purely an art form, can no longer exist. Of course, there are still those in this space who are striving to better themselves and the people around them, but for many, fashion is as simple as matching the color of their t-shirt to whatever hyped-up general release sneaker they have in their wardrobe. As you mentioned before, since we live in a subjective world with subjective standards, outwardly critiquing/judging others without knowing their intent or purpose within the fashion space can be detrimental at worst and a waste of energy at best in my opinion.
I hate that most of the fashion influencers on social media always overpraise each others styles/brands. That's probably the most annoying part of the toxic positivity.
yo dude! love the vids, am rly interested in finding some nice yohji or issey miyake trousers, but they are all super short, any advice for finding stuff that fits people like 6'2? or are a lot of these cuts supposed to be cropped above the shoe?
@Fashion Elitist Idk its also hard for us short kings too. Im on the smaller side, around 4'8 and its damn year impossible to find a proper size that fits because i need a 36 inseam at least. What should i do???
Truth is I’m too ugly for fashion 🤷♂️ just the truth. Like there are things I’d love to wear but I just wouldn’t look good in them, clashes with my face 💀
This is how i feel about fixed gears, falling into a hole that i need to get the most coveted and expensive frames and components even though i have tons of fun on my shitbox, but the status and pressure of having the most expensive and respected frames makes me feel bad about myself
As a content creator myself I can also say that designers often contact me to send me their clothes that I then return back to them. So I’d wear outfits that would cost about £2000-£3000 but I don’t own them or anything, I just shoot content and then return them back which I think people often don’t understand
This is a really good video your very well spoken. I like fashion and dressing up but I'm not very knowledgeable on actual fashion I kinda just wear whatevers clean on my floor and I don't really wear anything other than black jeans and mcr shirts people try and label my style as emo but I think I'm going to try step outside of my comfort zone fashion wise. Also luv ur hat
I freaking love your video’s I’m not someone who is very knowledgeable on fashion but I also don’t dress like a NPC, so your videos help me learn more about what fashion is. Also are you a philion fan?
Hey man, i discovered you recently and now I’m really hooked to your style and Videos. Keep it up! But can you give any advice on how to dress as a short guy? Because i hate skinny clothes, but loose and baggy fits just make me look even shorter :/ I’d appreciate your opinion on that.
Hey! I hope I'm not too late, I'm 5'6/120 lbs Best way to look taller is to tuck your shirts and tees in your pants + belt for adjusting and maintaining the wanted height for your pant The 30/70 ratio (top/bottom) is so good on short guys like us, you are not taller with this, but you don't look short anymore For your pants choice, I really do love baggy/lose pants but if you're not comfortable with these kind of cut, pleated pants/suit pants are a very good choice too, it looks slimmer but you keep that kinda loose vibe and high waist pant are easier to fit For the top, as I said, tuck your Tee or shirts, it looks way better for proportion and height For hoodies, most cuts are good even oversized, but not too long And finally, your jackets, it needs to be adjusted with your pant height, generally at your waist, you don't want a big jacket that fall way too low on your pants, you just look weird and short (besides trench coat) Hope you see this comment, and don't hesitate if you have questions Edit: My style is mostly black core mix with some tech-athleisure and I love snkrs and my limit price for an item is 300€
I can't dress, I have no style ... I hate shops or shopping, most clothes annoy me. Am I a hopeless case ? I'm just so impatient in stores. I like colourful clothes but when I buy them I don't feel confident wearing them. I end up wearing the same jeans and sweaters all the time. I feel uncomfortable when I get compliments and don't trust them. Anyways ... Outfit fuck fuck
Thank you for your reply. I think I was often shamed as a child for my 'tastes' and capitalism reinforced that. So I feel like I ha e two versions of me, the only that can 'make money' and the one that is a stupid teenager. I am far from a teenager. I know it's irrational today and I can exist as I am. But I am not allows that convinced and sometimes just scared. I'll try this year to wear what I like hopefully something happens hahaha
I live in North Dakota, born and raised here. People always think I'm from "California" or are surprised that I'm local. Its pretty rare, but occasionally I do see some wild fashions at the grocery store. Mostly though, its just me dressed to the 9s looking at cereal. The "Carhartt Coworker" hahaha - I have a handful of those up here but that's more a workinman getup and we have lots of workinmans up here
I buy a lot of my clothes second hand and follow trends from a distance, which is kind of my way of having my own style in it. Like, silhouettes (oo buzzword) that are popular I can kind of "follow" with clothes I own or that I can buy that fit me, I don't need a dupe of those specific pants if those pants that I got for twenty bucks on Vinted look not only kinda similar, but they also fit my preferred colors or style better. Not to say that I won't buy trendy pieces, because I will buy from brands that are popular a lot of the time, but I don't want a Tiktok/RUclips microtrend closet. Recently, shoes like New Balance 530s, 550s or Adidas Sambas have been popular for women in the kind of fashion styles im into (which is kinda mainstream) but I found some old Adidas by1754 that I still had at home, I actually think they're like volleyball or handball shoes idfk i bought them in like 2017, and was like hey those look cool and actually look better on me than if I was the 5th bitch in New Balance 530's in my year. Also, I can't just buy every fucking shoe because I need narrow toe boxes. I have like the opposite of bunions where the inner side of my foot is literally a straight line so here come my beloved Nike Air Max 200s for saving my ass so many times with their nonexistent toebox. I don't look all that great in those super flares or most hyperspecific trendy cuts? Doesn't matter, that one pair of pants I got used two years ago thats from some obscure American Brand without any online presence is literally the toughest and most durable material I've ever seen in my entire life and they're baggy and look GOOD. This says essentially nothing but the point I'm tryna make is that you don't have to be not trendy at all if you want to have your own style, you just kinda wanna know how to go along with trends in ways that you like. Also: Agree, it's so incredibly fabricated how fashionable people are, and with that I mean it's NOT happening irl unless you're in a major city. I live in assfuck nowhere in Germany and almost every teenage to early 20s female has puffer jackets, baggy or flared light was jeans, air force 1s and slicks their hair back in a bun or uses claw clips. You'll see the occasional emo kids sometimes. Adults have basic mid 2010s fashion sense. Everything moves slooowwww. It's nothing like those gigantic microtrends online. You'd be considered SO fashionable if you followed trends from 2020.
This video has an interesting title but the connection between the title and the video is unclear to me. The intro offers three topic you'd like to discuss but no connection between the topics and how they support the idea the idea proposed by your title. RE: Subjectiveness of Fashion - While it can be used to shutdown feedback, I'd have appreciated it if you spent time discussing how to balance one's preferences with external advice. This chapter only talks about the flaws of the Subjectiveness of Fashion, not how to manage the flaws while still gaining the benefits of the Subjectiveness of Fashion. RE: Toxic positivity - I'd appreciate if you made the distinction between feedback and how that feedback is delivered. While feedback itself should run the full range from positive to negative, how it is delivered should always be done in a positive way. Kinda like how an amazing pasta dish would be ruined by being blended, its still the same food but how the food is delivered makes all the difference. RE: Critique - I think this section can be much simpler. What I noticed in your examples of "hate" is that they all where the judgement of how the person giving the feedback feels. Now alone, I agree this feedback is worthless, but I believe that statements like these can become great critique, they just don't go far enough. So if the judgement is "Your outfit is basic" alone would not be helpful. However, if the observation that led to that judgement are included then this "hate" become a valid critique imo. So instead had the same person said "Your outfit is basic, the colors lack contrast and they are hard to tell apart." that would be valid critique. But it does introduce another question, how does one determine which critique is worth acting on? This question would be a great opportunity to expose the positive side of Subjectiveness I mentioned earlier. Going back to the basic critique, once you know that observation is a lack of contrast you are now free to determine if their concern is addressed in a different way like a contrast of texture. Or if you even care about contrast enough to change. Without a strong sense of you own subjective style it is impossible to integrate critique in a subjective space like fashion. RE: Introspection/Life - So ignore social media as their interests don't align with building your style. Also building style takes time. I appreciate you pointing out introspection but I am confused why little, if any, time was spent articulating how to be introspective in a fashion sense. Also your final point of "don't do anything you are not comfortable doing" can contradict the flaws you raised with the subjectiveness of fashion. As it is easy avoid listening to critique because it is something they are uncomfortable doing.
Honestly your acceptance of your style is only approved or disapproved by you if you hate it or can’t decide your confident enough too own it you won’t enjoy or embrace it so fashion is a battle with self because others will always having varying opinions it’s jus life ..
A lot of people take criticism as a prescriptive rather than an outside perspective that can be occasionally useful to your "vision" or whatever. it's not a big deal!
Not to mention that all these people who complain about these extreme toxic positivity movements, saying how in your face everybody is about loving everything regardless of it's actual quality are usually the reason this sort of situation started in the first place. It's a responce to the hate that they themselves were spilling on other people instead of just expressing properly argumented, even if subjective opinions. General hate will create a force of blunt acceptance and the circle continues.
I never really feel compelled to share my face on the internet but I REALLY want to make a response video to this...
I was super pleased to see that this turned into a sort of anti-social-media/anti-consumption message, an enlightenment for viewers who I really hope take it seriously. This is something I realised when I deleted Instagram, and just turned my back on consuming constant imagery and information about fashion. I like to watch a few fashion vids here and there on RUclips, its something I'm passionate about so I'm not interested in completely cutting it out, but for my own wellbeing I've had to just turn away from all of the influencers. I'm 23, and so many of my peers constantly share their newest status symbol pieces on social media, for me it sent me into a FOMO-induced frenzy, I started consuming like crazy, and for someone with impulse issues it was a big problem. I really compensated for my crippling self hatred through buying the most coveted pieces I could possibly get my hands on, for some sort of social status. It was exhausting. And not very rewarding. I never felt truly like myself in these clothes. And even now, following whats cool at the moment, I really do like a lot of the 'trendy' styles people wear. A lot of popular fashion pieces are really sick, I can appreciate them, but without the influence of social media and constantly seeing it on other people, I no longer feel the need to buy into it or be part of it. When I look in my wardrobe, and I'm currently doing a huge purge, the clothes I really reach for are actually very simple pieces. They make me feel comfortable. They make me feel confident. To me it's less about the item and more about the overall image. It's about knowing that a certain colour does not look good on me, no matter how sick the graphic is, or how much the brand is worth. It's about knowing what kind of 'self' I am presenting when I'm wearing it, and if it truly represents who I am and where I'm at with my life. Because there is a real world outside of social media. And the constant need to keep up with trends is a tireless and expensive task that I am no longer interested in participating in. Through all of this, I don't think I've compromised on 'style'. There is a certain 'look' I'm going for, a 'silhouette' I want to achieve, but what I love about it is it's particular, and I've become a lot more picky about what I want to bring into my life to create that look, and it's not influenced by anyone telling me what to love, and where to shop it. It's all luck based, I buy exclusively second hand, and I've avoided going online for it too because often the prices are just completely unreasonable. So it feels more special this way.
Anyway I could go on. This is why I want to make a response video, but I'm not a RUclipsr or anything, and I don't have editing skills. But yeah just wanted to share my personal experience with this. Fashion exists outside of the online trend bubble. And to me, that fashion is way more interesting. It's about real life people.
bro wrote a book
i aint reading allat 💯💯
u a goof
aint reading allat but im happy for you, or sorry for you depends🙏
Not readin all dis gang
toxic positivity can also very be annoying whenever ur looking for actual advice and people just say something like 'oh you look fine'. yeah ok but that's not the point. because this has happened quite a few times I also just feel like an asshole now whenever they ask me and I do give criticism or whenever I want to give someone criticism in general. I'd say as long as you're respectful and try to be constructive, you're most likely good but it's hard to follow my own advice sometimes.
I don’t think everyone wants to be a fashion critic or wants everyone else to evaluate their choice of clothes. 99% of people dont care and from the 99% that care and have knowledge dont care enough to critique everyone around them. Everyone thats really into fashion understands that its just a petty rich people thing like most high art. Its not that serious.
“toxic positivity”
@@Tecium ☠☠☠☠
Nice pfp
@@Fleetwootmack thx! it's fan art from omori, great game :)
Hey man just wanna say as a reminder for how harsh we can be on ourselves: i literally wouldnt have noticed the pimple unless you pointed it out. You look like a normal person, because everyone gets them.
i noticed it but its nbd
i had a bad breakout once that covered my entire forehead like type 3 acne
its common tbh
the pimple accented the red letters in the cap...keep the pimple lose the stupid lid.
another aspect of social media that imo takes away from fashion is the loss of physicality. even when they show you textures and whatnot holding the physical piece of clothing and appreciating it as an actual unique object (not as part of a brand or as a signifier of something else) is a very enjoyable part of fashion. owning too much stuff also takes away from this. thinking of your clothes as your little collection of unique objects you put on your body is a perspective that has given me a lotttt to introspect. you start deriving value from the individual history of each item, decontextualize it, transform it , and then either wear it to death of pass it on as something even more unique
i actually needed this sm thank you for this, i’ve been getting so upset at myself lately bc i feel as if i lost all my knowledge in myself when it comes to my style bc of the amount of media my brain has consumed and getting sucked into the trends that’s everyone is doing. im trying so hard to find myself in this all over again but this reminded me to just disconnect to reconnect
Get off tiktok dork
I love how you can explain these things in a way that is semi serious so you actually get something from it but It doesn't get boring. I feel like fashion at the moment especially for people getting into it is a mine field to actually find quality style but it's definetly possible to find if you just research it enough and find what you actually like instead of just copying an average grwm
now glue your mustache back
Fashion takes time but also as you get older your relationship to fashion changes. In highschool it was easy to wear heels because I’d only walk short distances and sit most of the day, but now I’m unable to wear what I want because I’m likely running errands, out with friends, or at work and these responsibilities alter what you are willing to wear. Especially when other people don’t appreciate fashion in the same way they make get upset about u wearing uncomfortable heels because it’s forcing you to walk slower or wastes time to go and change shoes. While ideally I’d be wearing rlly over the top fits and clothes that cause some discomfort for the visual, it is not realistic for my life and those around me and so it’s altered my style to see what I’m willing to do. I’m trying to overcome these frustrations to enjoy clothes as much as I did when I was younger but unless you’re a celeb or influencer it’s unlikely to pursue fashion to the full extent the lot of us would like.
Completely agree. I'm (just) in my forties, love fashion. Not in a particularly cool way but really enjoy it. But yes lifestyle bears influence, slim (dare I say skinny) jeans/trousers or knee length loose skirts/shorts suited my commute cycling into work. Being older I've also a couple of maxi or long midi straight skirts (that I have for a long time and ahead of current trends) that i love but again if cycling don't work. Also I slopped around on the wet streets of Dublin in long trousers in college so can't return to that style! I'm also a mother so comfort and durability is needed. Now I try to incorporate my "special" items (usually a really good coat or jacket) into a pretty functionary (perhaps boring) style to help me feel nice!
honestly, I've never thought that the best personal advice to self-development would come from your mouth. I've watched and read a lot of self-development, psychology, performance and etc. and really, you could just summarize in 20 minutes what every single one of that coaches out there try to distort for their own gains.
Based comment
remember that life isnt just performance and maximizing your effectiveness. Thats a neoliberal and modernist stupid idea that is driving people to burnouts or suicides daily
the last video I watched tonight and this has caused me a lot of thinkingggg how am i gonna sleep now. Generally, this has been extremely helpful as I have noticed that I am becoming more and more detached w some aspects in fashion in social media. Im actually trying to go back with print/ books. That semi quietness is what I’m yearning for lately. ❤
This last part is great advice! Having self reflection on why we make certain decisions is really important. The internet sorta makes it seem unfair, how everyone else has such cool fits and shit.. when in reality they likely have all the same negative thoughts and struggles that people who don't post do. I think for me sort of taking a more conceptual approach to inspiration helps, rather than wanting to dress in a certain style, I am trying to decide what I want based on why that aesthetic quality speaks to me. If I could describe how I want to dress, it'd sound like post-punk meets hyperpop. This to me is very challenging to try and interpolate abstract feelings into what the clothing communicates -which is why I enjoy fashion.
I would love to see some outfit reviews/breakdowns by you, talking about what works and doesn't work, how this or that outfit make use of the different elements of fashion, etc!
What i really like about you is that you always tell us the right advice in a way that isn’t toxic or frustrating it is really important for me to take advice when i feel good about it it’s never okay to take a toxic advice even if its true i will always try to learn from you
Why would I read a book about self improvement when this video has summarized everything for me. Thank you :)
Damn very well said. I feel lve been going though this process of introspection quite a lot recently and I’m reflecting more and more and consuming less and less, but the fashion community makes you want to believe that you are only a part of it when you buy one of your grails atleast every 2/3 Months (I’m exaggerating to make a point, but you know what I’m talking about) and I couldn’t really pinpoint why I felt like I wasn’t really part of a community. That really helped me, so thank you!
Not the message we wanted to hear but the message we needed to hear
More devious frugal aesthetics
i have deleted instagram, discord, tik tok etc.. for almost a year now. and after learnt more and did what i liked. perused my passion! honestly at first it was hard but i recommend doin it. also love ur vid
17:29 same thing with rooms/ people/ lifestyles Tiktok so consistently gives us unrealistic expectations we feel we should be on par with. Ultimately at least for me i put my self down a lot and ran my pockets instead of just living life and finding cool finds over time.
Thank you again, your videos are helping me a lot to solve a question that has been on my mind for weeks
I'm really excited about your content man, another great video
I appreciate it!
I really liked this video! I want to ask: something you mention in this video is "the normie outfit". You have made a videos in the past about timeless wardrobes. To clarify, do you define "normie outfits" as outfits that are basic/you would construct if all you have is the basic/timeless wardrobe and nothing else (defining the normie outfit could be a fun short video)? Another question: what does useful criticism look like for someone who is just in the stages of building a timeless wardrobe and is not necessarily venturing into specific genres/aesthetics yet? Additionally, how does one parse out useful criticism to criticism that may not be as helpful? For example, if someone's current goal with fashion is to find clothes that they feel good in as it relates to body image, how should they value criticism about things like the sillhouette of a piece versus the colors being chosen for an outfit?
Overall, I really like the content and I think I am learning a lot more about fashion! This channel is great at facilitating me learning about the kind of fashion I like!
Please answer this question in a video!
I’ve watched all of ur videos and I loved every single one of it. I really want to start building a nice wardrobe but since I live in germany ordering things outside of the EU is so pricey bc the EU has these high ass duties you have to pay for. I always look at myself and feel the need to improve my style but I find it very difficult to have a starting point, I know that you should start with building a wardrobe of basics and essentials but I don’t really know where to find them since ordering from outside of the EU is so expensive. Thrifting also isn’t an option since I live in the Middleton nowhere basically.
i love the internet. in a sense, it has been my most consistent companion throughout adolescence and into adulthood. but i'm beginning to realize that i must let go, i must let go, i must let go. i must. i am so, so stagnant.
What is the ideal place on one's style In a scale from wearing clothes as a form of self expression or as art to wearing clothes just to look presentable and seek validation from other people ? Beacuse lets be honest I wont be able to wear head to toe yohji for a job interview or wedding.
What should one do such in such scenerios ? Should one just suck it up and wear normy clothers for some scenarios and wear your own style when appropriate (which is very subjective )or try to incorporate your self expression and make it work ?
I’d say you can wear full Yohji to a wedding if you wanted to a lot of his stuff is formal but if there’s a dress code I’d need a specific formal wear then I’d assume you’d have to follow that
You just have to formulate your own take on the appropriate genre for the situation.
This is easy fix. Just wear 80% "normie" and change up 1 aspect of your fit. Like for example, make your shoes and accessories interesting. Or change up just ur coat or pant. Then u can start learning to incorporate stylized pieces into your daily style and test the boundaries of what is acceptable.
@@possumbossom No, just going loosely by percentages would be a mistake. That's how you experiment with your style personally, not how you dress for a role.
@@tal4466 80% is just a rando number i threw out. I meant to dress majority appropriate for the role. But if you still want to express yourself, you can do so incognito by incorporating 1 quirky element seamlessly into your otherwise normal fit. Trust me, people will still notice if you play around with subtle differences whether in color, style, or silhouette. Fashion is trial and error and error is where you learn.
found your channel few days ago and im so freaking obsessed with your videos man, u da bomb
Just recently came across your page from the video "you suck at hair care" and I just wanted to say that your channel is so underrated! Keep it up.
As a man and a guitarist who came of age in the era of bands like The Fall of Troy and The Blood Brothers, overly form -fitting skin tight pants are all I’m really comfortable wearing even though I know I could look “better” in other cuts. Love the content man, I really appreciate your sincerity
Fashion is subjective but I really really hate that Rick owens kiss boot or heels
A lot of these concepts are applicable to all areas of our individual lives (been trying to do so myself for a while, it's hard but rewarding on the long term:)
I found your channel recently and instantly loved it keep it up!!
I have a question when he said criticism is good what does he mean by that because multiple people can like different things
After watching this video im so glad i haven't cared about fashion since 8th grade
Honestly fashion sucks don’t fall into it
every video from this guy boils down to "we live in society"
Your style sucks bc you’re not wearing jaded London parachute pants + new balance 2002r matcha colorway + AirPod max 😍😍😍
i love paying high prices for fast fashion 🖤
@@mystic5008 new fashion trend for 2023
Fashion is expression. Teste ia subjective. If I dislike your clothes it doesn't matter. But we can always have a discusion about If your outfit comunicantes what you want to express.
great use of the hat, unironically matches with the pimple which looks pretty dope!
this video feels like when you need to hit a word count on a paper and bs the topic to hit the quota
0:15 bro someone save that plant
@@israeltijero7685 he’s too focused on his looks and just doesn’t have the time for the plant
real
What music starts playing at 12:39 ? I love that instrument…
This is amazing!!!! I love the open convo 🧚♀️
3:26 Me! , you are loved Sensei
What runway show is @4:15 ?
Best youtube video i've seen in a while. Good job dude!
Fuck I'm chonically online
I think where this video loses me or goes wrong is the idea of growth as a good thing; whether in how you use it in the case of growth in personal style or growth/change in fashion. Growth in terms of style isn't always good if you find a way of dress that you feel like accurately communicates who you are or what you want to say or are comfortable in how you dress then growth isn't necessary. Vice versa if you do want to change or grow your style because you enjoy that change or feel as if you aren't fully communicating what you want with how you dress that too is perfectly fine. Ultimately I think growth in the realm of style doesn't have an inherent value it is neither inherently good or bad rather it is up to the individual whether they want to grow or feel as if they need to grow. Because of this I disagree with your idea that its wrong to hide behind subjectivity and that criticism is important across the board, because it is perfectly fine to say I'm comfortable with how I dress and I understand why you might not like the way I dress but that doesn't mean I have to change.
Furthermore, I think there are other ways to discuss style than critique, you can instead inquire as to why someone dresses the way they do and what they are trying to communicate by dressing that way. Because of this I also disagree with the point that hiding behind subjectivity and saying "that's just ur opinion" stops discussion; because there are other conversations around someones style that can be discussed besides good and bad outfit or like and dislike. I also think in terms of personal style, many times these conversations, around what someone intends with how they dress, can be more productive in refining/changeing/growing style than criticism. That's not to say criticism is bad either, sometimes people seek or open themselves up to criticism because they want to discuss their style in that way. BUT, it is not hiding or being toxically positive if you don't care for critique/ want critique on how you dress if you don't want to change how u dress; there is nothing inherently wrong or toxically positive about that. I just think it isn't (always) toxically positive to say someones critique is subjective as a reason for not changing your style; you can simply disagree with them.
ie just because criticism is different than hate doesn't mean criticism is always warranted. because growth in style isn't mandatory or inherently good. just because criticism can lead to growth doesn't mean criticism is always warranted because not everyone wants to grow/ needs to grow their style.
Ain’t no one reading that
I agree that criticism is needed for growth and development(with toxic positivity being a very real and inherent problem, especially on social media platforms). Still, I think part of this argument fails to acknowledge that not everyone who participates in fashion is actively trying to further themselves or improve in a particular sort of manner(whether that is by improving their style, increasing their general knowledge, or even trying to use their platform to educate others). As we come to this singularity in which fashion exists in all states; from tiktok trend riders to archivebeasts to the avant-garde specialists that are pushing the boundaries of the space, I believe fashion, as purely an art form, can no longer exist. Of course, there are still those in this space who are striving to better themselves and the people around them, but for many, fashion is as simple as matching the color of their t-shirt to whatever hyped-up general release sneaker they have in their wardrobe. As you mentioned before, since we live in a subjective world with subjective standards, outwardly critiquing/judging others without knowing their intent or purpose within the fashion space can be detrimental at worst and a waste of energy at best in my opinion.
I think style is ultimately a discussion with self
I felt so called out when he was talking about the fashion of people living in Missouri
this man talks like how my thoughts would, spittin bruh.
saw this video pop up and i went "oh snap christian uploaded alrea- wait a minute.."
I hate that most of the fashion influencers on social media always overpraise each others styles/brands. That's probably the most annoying part of the toxic positivity.
Can you also make a video where you teach how to lace your converse laces the way you have done on your. Plzzz
yo dude! love the vids, am rly interested in finding some nice yohji or issey miyake trousers, but they are all super short, any advice for finding stuff that fits people like 6'2? or are a lot of these cuts supposed to be cropped above the shoe?
im also that height but its super hard to find pants man, alot of yohji usual fits cropped, but its a hit or miss honestly
@@fashionelitist fuckkk dude at least its a shared fight haha
@Fashion Elitist Idk its also hard for us short kings too. Im on the smaller side, around 4'8 and its damn year impossible to find a proper size that fits because i need a 36 inseam at least. What should i do???
i saw the thumbnail and i thought it was frugal aesthetic
W vid man! ( nah this was awesome though Ty sm i always enjoy watching your vids.
Can I get your type of hairstyle with medium length hair?
Truth is I’m too ugly for fashion 🤷♂️ just the truth. Like there are things I’d love to wear but I just wouldn’t look good in them, clashes with my face 💀
Spectacular thought process. Have a nice day
16:45 anybody got the ID on tech-dark wear guys pants
Yohji
This is how i feel about fixed gears, falling into a hole that i need to get the most coveted and expensive frames and components even though i have tons of fun on my shitbox, but the status and pressure of having the most expensive and respected frames makes me feel bad about myself
As a content creator myself I can also say that designers often contact me to send me their clothes that I then return back to them. So I’d wear outfits that would cost about £2000-£3000 but I don’t own them or anything, I just shoot content and then return them back which I think people often don’t understand
Great Vid, been growing my style forever and I truly love style progression like you said it’s a process
Had be trippin at 8:02, thaught I somehow skipped videos back to my fingerboarding playlist 😂 I was like wtf?
Cinematic masterpiece as always
Sick beanie, I need that.
thumbnail is way to blurry, dont know what goin on
Not really the focus is on the screen clearly
*i'll be talking about* 3 main philosophical points and ideas that *i'll be talking about*
This is the most video I've seen and I really it. 💜
This is a really good video your very well spoken. I like fashion and dressing up but I'm not very knowledgeable on actual fashion I kinda just wear whatevers clean on my floor and I don't really wear anything other than black jeans and mcr shirts people try and label my style as emo but I think I'm going to try step outside of my comfort zone fashion wise.
Also luv ur hat
I freaking love your video’s I’m not someone who is very knowledgeable on fashion but I also don’t dress like a NPC, so your videos help me learn more about what fashion is. Also are you a philion fan?
bro is referring 2 real people as npcs
bro is extremely online
The first style at 3:00, what style is it? The guy on the left with the white face mask.
Dark wear
That’s what I’m trying to know
its a mix of dark wear and formal wear
Hey man, i discovered you recently and now I’m really hooked to your style and Videos. Keep it up! But can you give any advice on how to dress as a short guy? Because i hate skinny clothes, but loose and baggy fits just make me look even shorter :/ I’d appreciate your opinion on that.
Hey! I hope I'm not too late, I'm 5'6/120 lbs
Best way to look taller is to tuck your shirts and tees in your pants + belt for adjusting and maintaining the wanted height for your pant
The 30/70 ratio (top/bottom) is so good on short guys like us, you are not taller with this, but you don't look short anymore
For your pants choice, I really do love baggy/lose pants but if you're not comfortable with these kind of cut, pleated pants/suit pants are a very good choice too, it looks slimmer but you keep that kinda loose vibe and high waist pant are easier to fit
For the top, as I said, tuck your Tee or shirts, it looks way better for proportion and height
For hoodies, most cuts are good even oversized, but not too long
And finally, your jackets, it needs to be adjusted with your pant height, generally at your waist, you don't want a big jacket that fall way too low on your pants, you just look weird and short (besides trench coat)
Hope you see this comment, and don't hesitate if you have questions
Edit: My style is mostly black core mix with some tech-athleisure and I love snkrs and my limit price for an item is 300€
keep it under 15 minutes bro. pulling for you
the mustache was great
It’s really not hard to dress people over complicate it
I can't dress, I have no style ... I hate shops or shopping, most clothes annoy me. Am I a hopeless case ? I'm just so impatient in stores. I like colourful clothes but when I buy them I don't feel confident wearing them. I end up wearing the same jeans and sweaters all the time. I feel uncomfortable when I get compliments and don't trust them. Anyways ... Outfit fuck fuck
Thank you for your reply. I think I was often shamed as a child for my 'tastes' and capitalism reinforced that. So I feel like I ha e two versions of me, the only that can 'make money' and the one that is a stupid teenager. I am far from a teenager. I know it's irrational today and I can exist as I am. But I am not allows that convinced and sometimes just scared. I'll try this year to wear what I like hopefully something happens hahaha
i feel like you’d laugh at me in public. and i actually love that
damn this is a banger vid
I live in North Dakota, born and raised here. People always think I'm from "California" or are surprised that I'm local. Its pretty rare, but occasionally I do see some wild fashions at the grocery store. Mostly though, its just me dressed to the 9s looking at cereal.
The "Carhartt Coworker" hahaha - I have a handful of those up here but that's more a workinman getup and we have lots of workinmans up here
My man just said self introspection
Yo... What is that shaver? Help us groom
Thank u Robin Williams
i have amazinf style but i dont know which shops and with what money
Loved the intro Keep it up
I´m here because of James Leung video!
And here I am in Costco jeans and cashmere sweaters
I buy a lot of my clothes second hand and follow trends from a distance, which is kind of my way of having my own style in it. Like, silhouettes (oo buzzword) that are popular I can kind of "follow" with clothes I own or that I can buy that fit me, I don't need a dupe of those specific pants if those pants that I got for twenty bucks on Vinted look not only kinda similar, but they also fit my preferred colors or style better. Not to say that I won't buy trendy pieces, because I will buy from brands that are popular a lot of the time, but I don't want a Tiktok/RUclips microtrend closet. Recently, shoes like New Balance 530s, 550s or Adidas Sambas have been popular for women in the kind of fashion styles im into (which is kinda mainstream) but I found some old Adidas by1754 that I still had at home, I actually think they're like volleyball or handball shoes idfk i bought them in like 2017, and was like hey those look cool and actually look better on me than if I was the 5th bitch in New Balance 530's in my year. Also, I can't just buy every fucking shoe because I need narrow toe boxes. I have like the opposite of bunions where the inner side of my foot is literally a straight line so here come my beloved Nike Air Max 200s for saving my ass so many times with their nonexistent toebox. I don't look all that great in those super flares or most hyperspecific trendy cuts? Doesn't matter, that one pair of pants I got used two years ago thats from some obscure American Brand without any online presence is literally the toughest and most durable material I've ever seen in my entire life and they're baggy and look GOOD.
This says essentially nothing but the point I'm tryna make is that you don't have to be not trendy at all if you want to have your own style, you just kinda wanna know how to go along with trends in ways that you like.
Also: Agree, it's so incredibly fabricated how fashionable people are, and with that I mean it's NOT happening irl unless you're in a major city. I live in assfuck nowhere in Germany and almost every teenage to early 20s female has puffer jackets, baggy or flared light was jeans, air force 1s and slicks their hair back in a bun or uses claw clips. You'll see the occasional emo kids sometimes. Adults have basic mid 2010s fashion sense. Everything moves slooowwww. It's nothing like those gigantic microtrends online. You'd be considered SO fashionable if you followed trends from 2020.
This video has an interesting title but the connection between the title and the video is unclear to me. The intro offers three topic you'd like to discuss but no connection between the topics and how they support the idea the idea proposed by your title.
RE: Subjectiveness of Fashion - While it can be used to shutdown feedback, I'd have appreciated it if you spent time discussing how to balance one's preferences with external advice. This chapter only talks about the flaws of the Subjectiveness of Fashion, not how to manage the flaws while still gaining the benefits of the Subjectiveness of Fashion.
RE: Toxic positivity - I'd appreciate if you made the distinction between feedback and how that feedback is delivered. While feedback itself should run the full range from positive to negative, how it is delivered should always be done in a positive way. Kinda like how an amazing pasta dish would be ruined by being blended, its still the same food but how the food is delivered makes all the difference.
RE: Critique - I think this section can be much simpler. What I noticed in your examples of "hate" is that they all where the judgement of how the person giving the feedback feels. Now alone, I agree this feedback is worthless, but I believe that statements like these can become great critique, they just don't go far enough. So if the judgement is "Your outfit is basic" alone would not be helpful. However, if the observation that led to that judgement are included then this "hate" become a valid critique imo. So instead had the same person said "Your outfit is basic, the colors lack contrast and they are hard to tell apart." that would be valid critique.
But it does introduce another question, how does one determine which critique is worth acting on? This question would be a great opportunity to expose the positive side of Subjectiveness I mentioned earlier. Going back to the basic critique, once you know that observation is a lack of contrast you are now free to determine if their concern is addressed in a different way like a contrast of texture. Or if you even care about contrast enough to change. Without a strong sense of you own subjective style it is impossible to integrate critique in a subjective space like fashion.
RE: Introspection/Life - So ignore social media as their interests don't align with building your style. Also building style takes time.
I appreciate you pointing out introspection but I am confused why little, if any, time was spent articulating how to be introspective in a fashion sense. Also your final point of "don't do anything you are not comfortable doing" can contradict the flaws you raised with the subjectiveness of fashion. As it is easy avoid listening to critique because it is something they are uncomfortable doing.
8:49 bros really calling Drew Joiner a hater
anyone id on thee multicolor sweater at 13:30 ? its cute im sorry
Issey Miyake
Your channel makes me feel the oppressive pessimism of life
Honestly your acceptance of your style is only approved or disapproved by you if you hate it or can’t decide your confident enough too own it you won’t enjoy or embrace it so fashion is a battle with self because others will always having varying opinions it’s jus life ..
Thank you my guy
Can I get the link to that beanie rq?
11:34 If someone sent me this I'd just fucking cry bruh
This is true but also common sense, everybody who can use their critical thinking knows this. The subjective part was REALLY, REALLY dragged on too.
Bro speaks a lot
Thank u
damn im jus tryna get fly not get hit with a truck of a thinkpiece on social medias influence on fashion brah i got ONE pair of pants
A lot of people take criticism as a prescriptive rather than an outside perspective that can be occasionally useful to your "vision" or whatever. it's not a big deal!
thank you for this video u made me realize some things
Not to mention that all these people who complain about these extreme toxic positivity movements, saying how in your face everybody is about loving everything regardless of it's actual quality are usually the reason this sort of situation started in the first place. It's a responce to the hate that they themselves were spilling on other people instead of just expressing properly argumented, even if subjective opinions. General hate will create a force of blunt acceptance and the circle continues.
where can i get that cat eared hat