Sometimes I'll crack jokes or make funny remarks when I feel uncomfortable discussing or get emotional talking about certain things. It is a common coping mechanism, often goes unnoticed if no one mentions it. Anything to keep the dialogue going, avoid any uncomfortable silences. I feel that all the time, can't imagine having a video record of my most difficult moments for the entire world to see. Kudos to you for having the courage to share your struggle with all of us. I've gotten better at resisting the urge to fill the unspoken gaps in conversation. Simple but not easy. Thank you for putting yourself out there. That takes courage. #respect
Emotional. Thanks for sharing. I was thinking that it would not have even mattered if you had had a SRS or not the sister based her reaction on what you used to be. Who wants to be judged by who we used to be?! Stay strong!
I hope you had a decent Valentine’s Day Steph, my gf and I are a literal ocean apart so we didn’t spend it together...but we’re not really fans of it anyway. I’m sorry your story didn’t have a happy ending, but it will happen for you, of that I have no doubt 😊.
"You have no obligation to tell people that you're trans..." Absolutely "...just because you've kissed them" Absolutely not. Everyone has a right to their sexuality and the right to exclude whoever they aren't attracted to from their sexuality. You are not "entitled to dating experiences" with people who like you under a false pretense. If you are honest with the person before anything happens, they can't fault you for doing anything yet. But here, you kissed and dated and it started getting serious before you were truthful. Being dishonest in a relationship is bad no matter who you are or whatever reason you have for being so.
Those are two very different things that you just said in this comment the thing about being dishonest as that particular relationship progressed is not without its truth so I will grant you that as a commentary on that experience. You have absolutely zero obligation to tell someone you are transgender after you kiss them unless you think its going to progress further. Sexuality has nothing to do with finding transgender people attractive, what you’re trying and failing to convey is something called “genital preference” which is when individuals don’t want to date trans people because they don’t have the genitals that people assume they have if they are cis-gender passing. Now while this isn’t transphobia and I fully support people having a genital preference it in no way effects for example wether strangers on the street or in a club find me attractive. It is not my responsibility to tell everyone I meet I am trans before I kiss them because if you don’t see it going past any more than a kiss with someone who finds you physically attractive and will never be more intimate than sharing a kiss with you, you are under exactly zero pressure to disclose our sexual identity before or after that kiss. So in short as as you’ve watched the video already and will have seen, my relationship to telling people I’m trans is very blunt now following on from the above experience. I disclose to anyone who I’m planning on dating or perusing anything with but transgender people can kiss whoever they like and not tell them providing they’re safe and providing they wont see the person again. It’s not a “false pretence” if they find you attractive and they want to kiss you regardless of your genitalia which is the only thing they wouldn’t know from looking at you and you know its not going to progress to a more intimate level. It’s not sexuality it’s physical attraction.
@@stephanielynnette Why do you have the right to kiss whoever you want *before* disclosing your situation but I don't have the right to not be tricked into making out with a trans woman? Why are only *your* feelings the ones that need to be considered? You have your hair, your clothes, your makeup, your perfume like a biological woman. You shave, nip and tuck all the necessary areas. You get surgeries and/or hormones to alter your outward appearance. On a very superficial level you could pass 100%, but knowing the truth after the fact would not just be disappointing to men like me, it would be disgusting. I'm sorry, but we fundamentally see you as men, despite the outward appearance. It absolutely is a false pretense to us because we're never going to see you as you want us to see you. You carry the "Y" chromosome, your skin and bone have been altered from a male blueprint, and the spit we've been swapping will feel like a man's after the fact. I wouldn't consider it this bad, but is that Minnesota HS kissing prank okay because they were unaware, initially willing and it was "just kissing"? I understand the trans community sees this perspective as bigoted, but regardless that's how we feel. If you get to dismiss how we feel, why should we be sympathetic towards how you do? And you know this isn't good to do because you've stopped entirely, so why are you defending it like it's totally okay? It's not okay to try to get what you want from us with no regard just because you don't respect our beliefs. The trans community seems to think that kissing us under what IS a false pretense, whether you want to respect that or not, is totally fine and I'm here to let y'all know it's fucking NOT. You are not the only person whose feelings need to be considered when building a relationship. He might be into it, he might not, but you are not entitled to make out with us any more than we're entitled to make out with lesbians before they reject us.
I want to see videos with the title 'he didn't disclose that he was a bigot'. There is no responsibility as a trans woman to disclose your private life. Sure, it makes sense before being intimate, but the requirements should be that all people who are bigots should disclose that to everyone they meet before going out on a date. This would allow all women, not just trans woman to make the choice to interact or not.
you should tell everyone you are tran b4 an kiss or thing that can hurt his belives or faith listening to her will get you hurt no 1 wants to be kiss by an freak without permission period
No I don’t. Trans people don’t owe anyone transparency. If someone is attracted to me, enough to ask to kiss me. They’re attracted to me, not my gender. Attracted to me, not my past. Attracted to ME not my GENITALS. I tell anyone I date I’m trans but I have kissed many people without disclosing my gender identity.
![Quando Rondo - Grow Up [Official Music Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/8zFnCg3BO4Q/mqdefault.jpg)
I teared up a bit watching this and I really admire how vulnerable you were in telling this. Sending you love and hugs 💜
Aww thank you lovely! Still awake it turns out!
@@stephanielynnette you really are quite the night owl! Making me feel old since making it to 11pm is late for me 😂
Agreed
I could tell how emotional you are sharing this story and I'm sending you hugs through the screen
Thank you so much!
AAAAAAAAA SO MANY TRANS QUEENS ON RUclips T_T
Woo! Trans Queens! 👑
@@stephanielynnette ❤️🥰😍
Sometimes I'll crack jokes or make funny remarks when I feel uncomfortable discussing or get emotional talking about certain things. It is a common coping mechanism, often goes unnoticed if no one mentions it. Anything to keep the dialogue going, avoid any uncomfortable silences. I feel that all the time, can't imagine having a video record of my most difficult moments for the entire world to see.
Kudos to you for having the courage to share your struggle with all of us. I've gotten better at resisting the urge to fill the unspoken gaps in conversation. Simple but not easy. Thank you for putting yourself out there. That takes courage. #respect
Emotional. Thanks for sharing. I was thinking that it would not have even mattered if you had had a SRS or not the sister based her reaction on what you used to be. Who wants to be judged by who we used to be?! Stay strong!
You're so welcome, Thank you for watching!
Hi Stephhhhhhhhh
Happy Valentine’s Day!!
I love the pins
Happy Valentine’s Day Ryan!
Sweet girl, you are no freak. You live and learn and grow.
💖💖💖
I hope you had a decent Valentine’s Day Steph, my gf and I are a literal ocean apart so we didn’t spend it together...but we’re not really fans of it anyway.
I’m sorry your story didn’t have a happy ending, but it will happen for you, of that I have no doubt 😊.
Do you know what I did have a lovely Valentine’s Day! Thank you for asking a very self fulfilling and affirming experience!
Hi Stephanie happy Valentine’s Day 💖
Happy Belated valentines to you too Paula! All the love! x
"You have no obligation to tell people that you're trans..." Absolutely
"...just because you've kissed them" Absolutely not. Everyone has a right to their sexuality and the right to exclude whoever they aren't attracted to from their sexuality. You are not "entitled to dating experiences" with people who like you under a false pretense. If you are honest with the person before anything happens, they can't fault you for doing anything yet. But here, you kissed and dated and it started getting serious before you were truthful.
Being dishonest in a relationship is bad no matter who you are or whatever reason you have for being so.
Those are two very different things that you just said in this comment the thing about being dishonest as that particular relationship progressed is not without its truth so I will grant you that as a commentary on that experience. You have absolutely zero obligation to tell someone you are transgender after you kiss them unless you think its going to progress further. Sexuality has nothing to do with finding transgender people attractive, what you’re trying and failing to convey is something called “genital preference” which is when individuals don’t want to date trans people because they don’t have the genitals that people assume they have if they are cis-gender passing. Now while this isn’t transphobia and I fully support people having a genital preference it in no way effects for example wether strangers on the street or in a club find me attractive. It is not my responsibility to tell everyone I meet I am trans before I kiss them because if you don’t see it going past any more than a kiss with someone who finds you physically attractive and will never be more intimate than sharing a kiss with you, you are under exactly zero pressure to disclose our sexual identity before or after that kiss.
So in short as as you’ve watched the video already and will have seen, my relationship to telling people I’m trans is very blunt now following on from the above experience. I disclose to anyone who I’m planning on dating or perusing anything with but transgender people can kiss whoever they like and not tell them providing they’re safe and providing they wont see the person again. It’s not a “false pretence” if they find you attractive and they want to kiss you regardless of your genitalia which is the only thing they wouldn’t know from looking at you and you know its not going to progress to a more intimate level. It’s not sexuality it’s physical attraction.
@@stephanielynnette Why do you have the right to kiss whoever you want *before* disclosing your situation but I don't have the right to not be tricked into making out with a trans woman? Why are only *your* feelings the ones that need to be considered? You have your hair, your clothes, your makeup, your perfume like a biological woman. You shave, nip and tuck all the necessary areas. You get surgeries and/or hormones to alter your outward appearance. On a very superficial level you could pass 100%, but knowing the truth after the fact would not just be disappointing to men like me, it would be disgusting.
I'm sorry, but we fundamentally see you as men, despite the outward appearance. It absolutely is a false pretense to us because we're never going to see you as you want us to see you. You carry the "Y" chromosome, your skin and bone have been altered from a male blueprint, and the spit we've been swapping will feel like a man's after the fact. I wouldn't consider it this bad, but is that Minnesota HS kissing prank okay because they were unaware, initially willing and it was "just kissing"?
I understand the trans community sees this perspective as bigoted, but regardless that's how we feel. If you get to dismiss how we feel, why should we be sympathetic towards how you do? And you know this isn't good to do because you've stopped entirely, so why are you defending it like it's totally okay? It's not okay to try to get what you want from us with no regard just because you don't respect our beliefs.
The trans community seems to think that kissing us under what IS a false pretense, whether you want to respect that or not, is totally fine and I'm here to let y'all know it's fucking NOT. You are not the only person whose feelings need to be considered when building a relationship. He might be into it, he might not, but you are not entitled to make out with us any more than we're entitled to make out with lesbians before they reject us.
@@joe3755 hahahha sorry but no lmao
I'm so sorry 😭
I don't see how come he didn't know!!!👀👀
I want to see videos with the title 'he didn't disclose that he was a bigot'. There is no responsibility as a trans woman to disclose your private life. Sure, it makes sense before being intimate, but the requirements should be that all people who are bigots should disclose that to everyone they meet before going out on a date. This would allow all women, not just trans woman to make the choice to interact or not.
Unfortunately bigots generally aren’t decent enough to do that 😂.
This is such a brilliant idea! But sadly not the world we live in! Thanks for watching!
you should tell everyone you are tran b4 an kiss or thing that can hurt his belives or faith listening to her will get you hurt no 1 wants to be kiss by an freak without permission period
No I don’t. Trans people don’t owe anyone transparency. If someone is attracted to me, enough to ask to kiss me. They’re attracted to me, not my gender. Attracted to me, not my past. Attracted to ME not my GENITALS. I tell anyone I date I’m trans but I have kissed many people without disclosing my gender identity.
@@stephanielynnette snd thst why i don't support thst b.s period