Being A Passive Dater | ZULA ChickChats | EP 78

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  • Опубликовано: 2 окт 2024
  • On this episode of ZULA ChickChats, we discuss what makes one a passive dater.
    What does being a passive dater mean? Why are people triggered by passive daters? What are the consequences they've faced for being passive? What advice do non-passive daters have for them?
    About ZULA:
    ZULA is a website catered to Singaporean female millennials. We cover lifestyle, perspective and inspirational stories of women in Singapore.
    Follow ZULA:
    zula.sg
    / zulasg
    / zulasg
    Get updates from ZULA on Telegram:
    t.me/zulasg
    Featuring:
    Bolin Chen - / doughnutcookies
    Chris Soh - / sohchris
    Leah Shannon - / mizchiefmagik
    Pepita Wauran - / saltandpeps
    Edited By:
    Atiqah Azhar - / teacarazhr
    Filmed By:
    Christine Lee - / christineleesh
    Lu Jielin - / adreamtolove17
    Atiqah Azhar
    Business & Sponsorship Enquiries:
    hello@zula.sg

Комментарии • 87

  • @crusty1205
    @crusty1205 5 лет назад +304

    literally any romance related topic:
    bolin: its my time to shine

  • @soapy2587
    @soapy2587 5 лет назад +491

    peps just explained my whole life

  • @krazyangelzz
    @krazyangelzz 5 лет назад +307

    love this lineup, interesting take from every single one of the cast.

  • @boddaramjis
    @boddaramjis 5 лет назад +300

    more of bolin and chris in chickchats please! so interesting to listen to them and insightful for us! really love this line up alot.

  • @druhseenuh
    @druhseenuh 5 лет назад +226

    bolin: “the fear of rejection is all the same” HELL YEA YOU TELL ‘EM

  • @reyes662
    @reyes662 5 лет назад +137

    I feel like Chris made so many good points!! Please have him on this show more often so that he could provide an opinion based on his sociology background

  • @icemilo21
    @icemilo21 5 лет назад +172

    bolin is like an older brother here :’) im really passive like peps too and I think this ep rly helped me

  • @Jay-ru2cw
    @Jay-ru2cw 5 лет назад +70

    Some of the zula chick chats episodes needs to be loooonnnngeeerrrr!!! I love the episodes where there are both guys and girls because it feels more balanced and controlled(: love how Bolin and Chris showed a different side of things. Although this episode was about passive dater, it was a wise choice to get a non-passive dater (I.e., Bolin) to share their alternative view. Perhaps Zula can consider finding someone of an alternative view to their topic for a more balanced and interactive discussion.
    Nonetheless, kudos to the team in front and behind the camera. By far one of my favourite Zula chick chats episodes!!!

  • @chenyilinnie418
    @chenyilinnie418 5 лет назад +173

    Nicee to see Bolin and Chris on Zula

  • @mekvek
    @mekvek 5 лет назад +42

    MORE BOLIN PLEASE!!!
    Or can we also get BoBoCharChar on Zula?!!! :)

  • @raferik.
    @raferik. 5 лет назад +69

    Peps’ reasoning being passive is super relatable

  • @cikguzakiyah98
    @cikguzakiyah98 5 лет назад +28

    the whole episode just turned into "peps dating life" episode which i like it hahahaha cuz can relate totally

  • @ihearyou235
    @ihearyou235 5 лет назад +93

    Sian la, high five peps

  • @20pointer
    @20pointer 5 лет назад +21

    Bolin can be crude but yet pretty experienced when it comes to dating.

  • @GoddessOfWhine
    @GoddessOfWhine 5 лет назад +9

    THIS BOLIN GUY IS AWESOME!! He is hilarious and brings up really great points! BRING HIM BACK!

  • @decemberwithouttheber2590
    @decemberwithouttheber2590 5 лет назад +25

    My self-esteem also like machiam non-existent sia. "Why will this guy like me? Don't self-praise ley" omg tats me totally

  • @rachellin2253
    @rachellin2253 4 года назад +6

    this is a counselling session for peps HAHAHA

  • @bestina9326
    @bestina9326 5 лет назад +43

    Chris is so wise omaiii

  • @ihearyou235
    @ihearyou235 5 лет назад +54

    8:15 but it just really sucks that guys don’t really put in much feelings??? Like u alr said it urself.
    Guys just hops around looking for the one who would reciprocate lor then boom “found it!” It like... ur feelings true or not one??? Or just looking for girl only

    • @jieqiiii
      @jieqiiii 5 лет назад +21

      Guys look for the one that will reciprocate, then they develop deeper feelings for them.
      "I show interest. If she show mutual interest then I let myself develop deeper feelings for her lor."

    • @heeheehaheho5649
      @heeheehaheho5649 5 лет назад +1

      Watch Psych2Go on how men fall in love.

    • @flashfsk
      @flashfsk 4 года назад +8

      Relationship is a two-way thing dude. If the guy shows interest, puts in effort and doesn't receive any return, how can you expect the guy to continuously chase after the same person? Imagine how he'll feel when after months and months or even (exaggerated) years, and then he realised that the girl wasn't "shy" or passive but was just never interested in him. How much time and effort goes down the drain. This doesnt apply to guys only, I'm sure girls have experienced the same.

  • @ginnyloveicecream
    @ginnyloveicecream 5 лет назад +27

    yas, i feel you peps

  • @loveyuri7695
    @loveyuri7695 5 лет назад +9

    really nice take on this topic! diverse povs and a smooth flow throughout the video :-) kudos!!!!

  • @melxieying
    @melxieying 5 лет назад +7

    But in all honesty tho, is playing hard to get/making yourself seem also desirable by others really important??? I clearly have no game and no idea how the dating world works. Help yo gurl out.

    • @psychedeliciously
      @psychedeliciously 5 лет назад

      Fuck no, I can attest to mature guys. It's exhausting to play these games. Be straight up (tho I doubt many girls will be), and ask if you really want to know.

    • @LIMPEH_
      @LIMPEH_ 5 лет назад

      For me , playing hard to get is a turn off but it's up to individual. Why is it a turn off ? Life is already so tough , for example with work and all the things revolving around life. Playing hard to get is very emotionally draining for the person trying to chase you. It also says alot on the maturity of the person. I would suggest an open conversation to talk about a relationship between both sides.

    • @melxieying
      @melxieying 5 лет назад

      ​@@psychedeliciously But isn't being direct or coming off too strong a turn off for most guys? I'd imagine they'd feel emasculated somehow🤔(side note: not that I don't think you could attest to mature guys but I find it a little ironic that your username is literally ​ holytittie in caps lol)

    • @LIMPEH_
      @LIMPEH_ 5 лет назад +1

      @@melxieying yup very exhausting. That's is why I will always be direct if I am interested in the person:) of course during the time of chasing there will be signs if you will be successful with the person or not. For example the way the person text etc etc. During the time of chasing , you can tell if the person is a passive dater or not as well , and once you know it , you can decide on your next course of action. Jiayou !

    • @psychedeliciously
      @psychedeliciously 5 лет назад

      @@melxieying Emasculated? Where did you get that from bro? Tumblr or the notebook? I'd admire that girl alot more if she was upfront instead of wasting time and energy beating around the bush. You'd think relationships would be better if both parties were honest and direct, but I guess if the relationship was founded on mind games, then they'd expect the same mind games to actually be fruitful for the relationship.
      I'd like to correct myself: mature people, both male and females fucking hate mind games. People who have actual obligations and ambitions can't afford a measly fuck on dumb mind games.
      Whoopdeedoo bro, ignore my feedback, use it for essay writing or piss on it, I wouldn't have any say on it.
      Not sure how my name is related to my comment but its a lovely name, I'm very certain my mom is proud of me.

  • @lanaitgirl
    @lanaitgirl 5 лет назад +19

    Lowkey feeling attacked lolol

  • @yapolloable
    @yapolloable 5 лет назад +4

    thumbs up for mobile legend reference

  • @ryovan
    @ryovan 4 года назад +1

    I like Bolin's personality. Very funny and straightforward. I totally burst out laughing!

  • @ProjectElf
    @ProjectElf 5 лет назад +1

    Everyone always say must communicate, but what if that person just don't wanna communicate with me???

  • @davhooper1710
    @davhooper1710 5 лет назад +1

    WHY NO GIVE CHRIS SOME SPACE? He looks so uncomfortable!!

  • @chengshengway
    @chengshengway 5 лет назад +7

    I feel Peps. and Chris

  • @mohamedimranfarid4801
    @mohamedimranfarid4801 4 года назад +1

    @6:32
    Wow Chris made a very good point.

  • @ms_natt
    @ms_natt 5 лет назад +3

    Bolin's opinions are BOMB !

  • @tsunaide
    @tsunaide 5 лет назад +1

    Peps 5 months isn't as bad as my bf's 2 year attack on his crush

  • @tanjunwei-zx1gl
    @tanjunwei-zx1gl Год назад +1

    💅🏻

  • @joyous1641
    @joyous1641 3 года назад +1

    this is bolin’s most normal video

  • @muhdhasan96
    @muhdhasan96 5 лет назад +3

    05:57 oh hor chris why you smile like that haaa? whatchu thinking

  • @nadineanne5309
    @nadineanne5309 2 года назад

    Thank you for this video!! This is really useful for what I'm experiencing right now

  • @1-billionbrains423
    @1-billionbrains423 5 лет назад +3

    i see bolin i click

  • @AbdulRashid-je7bx
    @AbdulRashid-je7bx 3 года назад

    for the first time chris said something wise advice and the truth about what he had talk about. it may be true for some people may have be afraid of rejection. but im not afraid of rejection. to me rejection means nothing to me. been rejected for my whole life. so im used to it and it didnt matter at all. it will never affect me or my life.no matter how many times i have been rejected. i will just move on and act like nothing happen.and forget about what have happen.

  • @danielseen697
    @danielseen697 4 года назад +1

    More bollin, super funny hahaha

  • @haarr3494
    @haarr3494 4 года назад

    Who wouldnt date pep??? Bro i would give my all to her if given a chance. Tanned chinese girl 😋

  • @mossad1438
    @mossad1438 4 года назад +1

    BoLin is damn funny 😆😆 #respect#toofunny#natural

  • @nkboon1234
    @nkboon1234 4 года назад

    Most young girls are passive. End of story. Oh yea. Girls are also not used to getting rejected

  • @joeby5383
    @joeby5383 5 лет назад +2

    I see Bolin, I click.

  • @IdhAName
    @IdhAName 5 лет назад +1

    overthinking guys have it alot also

  • @Nat-ri1gy
    @Nat-ri1gy 5 лет назад +6

    is it me or does peps look like adria

  • @dopiley
    @dopiley 5 лет назад +1

    so basicaly, Peps friendzoned on purpose?

  • @unicetan2474
    @unicetan2474 4 года назад

    Bolin is damn real & calls bullshit out, love it 4:18

  • @boombutton3452
    @boombutton3452 4 года назад

    master jdsknsskns yall shld play mobile legends👍🏻

  • @zacpu2735
    @zacpu2735 5 лет назад

    leah - " ... the girl will reject you but won't embarrass you .."
    that is nice if its true.

  • @Soulrrr
    @Soulrrr 3 года назад

    i resonate with what peps said to a T 😭😭 i understand sis 🙏

  • @deathzxz1912
    @deathzxz1912 5 лет назад +3

    MLBB?

  • @nishaismail1036
    @nishaismail1036 5 лет назад

    Peps is just like me. But can we have more of Bolin & his relationship advise & terms 👍🏻

  • @cariedge
    @cariedge 5 лет назад +1

    wished i saw this video 4 years ago... :(

  • @OdenYourMum
    @OdenYourMum 5 лет назад +1

    Damn, this hit me right in the feels :')

  • @blubeedoobee
    @blubeedoobee 5 лет назад +1

    bolinnnnnnnnnnnnn

  • @krispykroke
    @krispykroke 3 года назад

    damn im a passive dater

  • @mabelneo
    @mabelneo 4 года назад

    Peps reflect my whole life gosh!

  • @jajalshadow
    @jajalshadow 4 года назад

    bolin is my spirit animal

  • @SoshiCaramel
    @SoshiCaramel 5 лет назад +1

    that ml reference

  • @HKspurs10
    @HKspurs10 4 года назад

    bolin's attacks bam bam bam

  • @dopiley
    @dopiley 5 лет назад

    bobocharchar in chickchats pls!

  • @yuzuchiffoncake
    @yuzuchiffoncake 4 года назад

    Peps is at least mythic V

  • @sayurik
    @sayurik 4 года назад

    Is Bolin single?? 👀👀👀

  • @Cloudforest811
    @Cloudforest811 4 года назад

    this was a really good episode!

  • @moot8107
    @moot8107 4 года назад

    Is Peps a Scorpio?

  • @sterlingforbes3872
    @sterlingforbes3872 3 года назад

    my girlfriend is the super passive type... drives me crazy.

  • @iuhnimtz
    @iuhnimtz 5 лет назад

    i feel thoroughly exposed 🙃🙃🙃🙃

  • @jhl8129
    @jhl8129 5 лет назад

    BAM ...BAM....BAM BAM BAM.... BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM

  • @zuhriahasano372
    @zuhriahasano372 4 года назад

    I see Bolin, I click

  • @pressurepointss
    @pressurepointss 4 года назад

    0:55 if this ain't me

  • @ewemeee
    @ewemeee 5 лет назад

    more bolin !!!!!

  • @Bryaneng27
    @Bryaneng27 5 лет назад

    real talk no.2

  • @weemaetay3136
    @weemaetay3136 5 лет назад

    loved this

  • @giangngo24
    @giangngo24 5 лет назад +2

    Early for first time

  • @ivanlimzg
    @ivanlimzg 5 лет назад

    5:51....

  • @christylim1244
    @christylim1244 5 лет назад

    PEPS! I understand u cos we same. & heyy can yall talk bout dating in sec sch and how to get one??

  • @itsmeem6107
    @itsmeem6107 5 лет назад

    GET.BO.LIN.BACC!! AND PEPS. AND CHRIS.!!!