WHAT REALLY HAPPENED TO MY MOM *VULNERABLE MOMENT*
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- Опубликовано: 5 фев 2025
- THE TRUTH ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO MY MOM VULNERABLE MOMENT
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Sorry that this happened Carnell but thank you for your vulnerability. That takes a lot of strength. Despite the trauma you’ve endured, you guys have created a beautiful family together and I wish you both nothing but healing, happiness, and success. ❤️
I can tell you still struggle telling this but at least you can tell it 🫶🏾 wishing you healing, this is TOUGH to process even 30 yrs later.
Hey I know it’s been a while since recording this but my advice is to just continue to listen to yourself trust in how you feel. Don’t feel pressured by others to get close with your father. Don’t be in a rush . listen to your gut. Let your boundaries be known from the beginning and express that you need him to respect them at all times that is the only way to build any kind of relationship. Now if your gut is saying no then it’s no. Try to make peace with everything that has happen but also acknowledge that they happened don’t sweep things under the rug. You are a strong person. And you seem like you are extremely loving to your wife and daughters. Coming from a similar background (my mom was also taken from me in the hands of a partner) you are doing amazing! Protect yourself and your family you’ve created
Thank you for sharing this - you didn’t have to do that. So many people (myself included) feel like they grew up with you and the other guys. You’re apart of SO many different families, memories, happy life experiences because you shared yourself from such a young age. Thank you for sticking it out and continuing to share yourself despite all the reasons life has given you not to.
Wow! Your story is literally almost identical to mine. My mom was taken from me by my dad when I was 18 months old. My dad was on drugs as well and my aunt/grandparents took me in. I’m 27 and my dad may be getting out when I turn 30. I’m so proud of you for staying positive and pushing through.
I think there's this notion that because we're blood related to someone we have to give them access into our lives and have relationships with them. If you feel someone holds negative energy (and in this case I mean brutally murdering your mother definitely holds alot) he can't expect to just come home and see you and build a bond and be around your kids. its insane bro! Just cause he sat in jail doesn't mean he's sorry or gets to reap the benefits of being around the great man you turned out to be and your family. Shit no love lost
Carnell, you know that we have always loved you, Terri, and Britney. With our four children and then having you three suddenly living with us was quite a challenge. With nine people in that little house we managed to make it work. Was it perfect? Love was the ultimate goal as we grew together as a family. Love is what overcomes every challenge. So with memories of love to you and to my nieces, keep growing in love, the love of Christ. Your Family 🥰🥰🥰
Carnell, I so appreciate and admire your vulnerability in this video. I can see it in your eyes that this situation triggers you. I’m so sorry you lost your mother in this way. I’m sure she’s smiling from heaven, so proud of how wonderful her baby boy has grown, and how he’s been able to prosper and inspire even in her absence. You are a STAR.⭐️ ♥️💐 sending all my love.
I really understand where you are coming from. I am 54 years old and have been through a lot in my life. Never had my parents in my life. Raised by other people abused me. I’ve sexually abused (by some relatives too). I’m always optimistic and never let me life experiences get to me if I can help it. Yes, I deal with depression and anxiety, during those times I talk to God. There are days that I don’t get out of bed, but I do Thank God each day He wakes me up & Thank Him throughout my day. Now I’m disabled and can’t work, but I’m still always smiling. If you don’t know me, you would all is well. The ones who know me always say they love my smile bc I keep one on my face. I think if you are ready to forgive, forgive. If you’re not, talk to God about it. Stay prayed up and blessed. 🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️❤️
Thank you for sharing your story. You over came so much in your life and have achieved so much beyond what you even knew you could. You have a beautiful family. I would say follow your instincts when it comes to your dad. Protect your family and your peace. ❤
Paused the video at the 2:35 mark to tell you that I'm already enjoying this video, so much! It's really precious and heartwarming and I admire your humility. Your attitude reminds me of how I need to be, in all situations. God bless you and your beautiful family.
Sorry Carnell you had to experience that at a young age and also carry those feelings or whatnot. Thanks for even feeling comfortable telling your story. I've been a fan since 2005 and I wish nothing but the best for your brothers, mother, wife, kids, and extended family. The world is harsh but you're living proof that things can workout... there's light at the end of the tunnel even when things might feel confusing or hopeless
Carnell, thanks for sharing your story with us. As someone who lost their mom more recently at the hands of someone else. I have not yet forgiven the person that did it. All I can say is protect you and your family's peace. If that means staying away, go for it but if you want to build that relationship that's okay too. Just give yourself all the time you need and don't let anyone pressure you one way or the other.
My first boyfriend was killed in front of me took me 18th years to forgive his killer
Wow, thank you for sharing this. Thank you for being vulnerable. Esp, as a man. Mental health is very real and however you need to and are able to process these experiences, do so healthily. I cannot imagine the courage it took to even voice this for the public. I truly do wish for you healing thoroughly, a sound mind, and in any area where you may be weak may you receive the strength you need to keep it pushing for yourself and loved ones!
I feel like if you have curiosity meet him by yourself but on the other hand he has nothing to teach you, you've done everything in life without him and now you're raising children of your own. I mean if you're curious maybe just a phone call but like you said he can't even give you an honest reason why he did what he did. I'm really proud that you decided to be stronger than the things that you've been through and still be able to show love not just for yourself but for your daughters. I also want to say that you don't have to consider your dad's feelings at all you aren't obligated to and I hope no one is making you feel that way not even you.
My mom tragically passed when I was 12 so I always distracted myself by playing my B5 cd all day! It’s not a coincidence that out of all 5 members Carnell was my favorite. In some way God leads us to OUR people. May all of our mothers rest in peace 🕊️
“Typical colored family” I don’t really know how I feel about that unfortunately, that happens in many families colored and not colored don’t let social media and specific narrative about black families create biases and in your mind or in your speech, I’m black I’ve had my mother in my life I’ve had my father in my life all my life they’re married and they’ve been in love all my life and I know so many other black and brown folks with that same narrative. Unfortunately there is negative households on every street and every part of the world. Negative households, is not associated with one specific culture or background
I’m black too and a social worker it literally happens in all groups it’s not just our people
We have good people and bad in ever race literally
Thank you for sharing ❤ and please do not apologize for how you articulate yourself!! This is a very vulnerable and sensitive story! I hope after sharing this story, you practice some self care on the mind and body!
Thank you for telling us ur story Carnell, I know it took a lot to let out. It takes a lot to face it,ur story made me think of my mom as well ( miss her a lot.😢 But I think she would be proud of the Man you that you are becoming. 💪👑🖤👊🏾 Keep being an inspiration and the warrior that you are.👑💪🖤🙏
Wow, I’m so sorry that happened to you.🙏🏿💕 My estranged father was on drugs and was in and out of jail and I only met him once in December 2019 and he died in April 2022 of cancer and he wasn’t in my life nor raised me and my stepfather was the one that was my father and my stepfather passed away unexpectedly in July 2018. Thank you for sharing your story. You can make a decision if you want to have a conversation with your father and go from there and make sure that you make the right decision for you and your well being.
I can relate to your story. The choice is ultimately yours so take your time making it. Don’t let anyone take that from you. You have the right to make whatever decision you want to make for you and your family. No matter what you choose to do pray on it, go to therapy and excuse boundaries.
Thank you for sharing this with us. I'm sure it's never easy to talk about. I love that you're strong enough to seek healing and continue to work towards better things in life.
I have a very traumatic past as well and it takes a lot of work and mental strength because healing from trauma is never just one and done, it's a healing journey that takes consistent work throughout our lives and being strong enough to fight past the pain and emotions that come when you get triggered.
I hope in those moments you can remember how far you've come, how hard you fought to get to this point and all the good in your life.
It's been over a year since you've posted this. How has it been going with you and your father? For the record, you don't owe him anything. Trust your intuition, if it's telling you not to allow a connection then cut it off. You can forgive for the sake of your own mental peace but you do not have to allow him to get close to you or your family. Protect your family and your peace and if you choose to keep contact do so in a very distant way.
Stay strong and keep fighting! ❤
Thanks for sharing! RIP to your mom. Tough situation to be in & share but Im happy that despite everything you are pushing through and now have a beautiful family. I think that you should keep your distance from your father for awhile & maybe only share bits and pieces of info with him through video (sort of what your doing now) until you have less anxiety ..or no anxiety at all about seeing him in person. Keep your family protected 🙏🏽
When it comes to seeing your father, take your time & put one foot infront of the other. Move at a pace that you are comfortable with. And don't put so much pressure on yourself to vlog the day he is released. Do it if you want the support and are comfortable, but don't feel like you have to for the sake of creating content. Only show people what you want them to see.
As for your father, be patient and see how your interaction unfolds. Don't be anxious about nothing.
I appreciate this video sooooo much right now even though I know it was uncomfortable to do, because I'm going through a rough season, probably one of the worst seasons of my life, and your testimony has truly made me realize that everything is going to be alright. No matter what life throws at you, you can get through it.
You have beautiful children, a beautiful wife and are so well-rounded and stable minded, despite all that you have been through.
I'm proud of you and Desree, and thankyou for sharing your story. It truly is remarkable what you made it through.
SO happy to hear that you are thriving and happy in your life despite of the challenges you have faced. God is with you! Blessed.
So sorry what you been through growing up as kid in bridgeport Connecticut. Its hard what to you went through with your dad with your both your sisters and other trauma went through . Thank you for sharing. You have good life great family. You let your dad see both your kids whenever your ready on your own time. Your strong scorpio
Your little girl did so good filming!!!
Wow!!! Ur from Bridgeport!?!! I work in BPT
Just finding your page I’m so so sorry that happened in your life I feel in my spirit that your mom is looking down at you and guiding your life.
My condolences to you for what has happened.
I wanted to say you CAN forgive him, which is good for your heart. However, forgiveness doesn't need a face to face conversation. If you decide to forgive him, you don't have to tell him that you forgave him. And that's vice versa.
I believe it's up to you if you want him to see your children. Also note that with every decision we make, there's a consequence. You have to decide on whether or not you can live knowing that your children never got to meet your biological father. But that's your choice to make.
Remember, you are amazing, and the most important thing is to stay true to yourself.
My advice to you is that when you are ready to talk to him but never alone have your uncles n aunts and sisters with you, at least that way you are not overwhelmed. Please be ready mentally, and have open mind when talk to him 🙏 rest in peace to your mother,
Crazy story it takes a big man to even talk to him and even tho he took something from you you could still sit down and talk to him much respect ✊🏾
Sorry that you went thru all this Carnell. Praying for you & your peace. Whatever you choose to do take your time & do what’s best for you & your family. Only you can make the decision of talking to him or not. You can love ppl from a distance. Love you always ❤
Hello I want to first say I’m so sorry for your loss and I’m praying for your family. 2nd thank you so much for sharing I had no idea what you have been through I’ve always been a fan of b5 and knew you where there cousin after a while and I’ve always saw in the bio of b5 that they got your family away from certain situations and then formed a group. Thank you for sharing your story. I would like to share my opinion however we have very different life stories and I’m not sure if my opinion matters as much as another but I’d like to share with you my thoughts on what you should do about your father being in your life. Number 1 I’m not a mother I don’t have a family of my own and don’t know what it would feel like knowing my father murdered my mother, so to say that the Bible teaches forgiveness I think is too easy I still get upset over a sibling breaking my favorite glass cup for example…. So this is tuff to think about I honestly don’t think I would want to be around him especially my children and family…..But then I think to myself what if I was in that situation and that was my father and thinking about him being on drugs I would always wonder is it really possible to change in jail for so long after stories that months later after getting out of jail people go out to being their old ways or can I believe that they really changed…… maybe when your ready you can meet him and see how you feel in his presents and after seeing how you feel wait a while and think about it or just wait a while until months later and see if he’s acting any different and then think about if he would possibly meet your kids and wife and possibly even your sisters I guess you’re the young man of the family and you probably should check him out before your sisters. One thing I will say is prayer changes things God does work miracles he could be a changed person or maybe he’s just changed for the moment because he was in there for so long so I would pray about it and ask the Lord to show you maybe through a dream or something about what you should do. Well I hope I was of some help and I hope you make the decision God wants of course sometimes that could be hard because you may not want to be around him and what if for some reason God wants you to be so I will be praying for you one thing for sure God would want you to forgive him but it doesn’t mean that that person has to be in your life unless God wants them to be…… once again I’m sorry for the loss of your mother and your loss of your sister I’m sorry about the painful things you’ve been through being molested dealing with the horrible music industry and one thing that I will say that we have in common is I have relatives in the streets right now on bad drugs who have done things to make me turn away and have gotten me into bad situation so it’s hard sometimes and then I have to remember to forgive and remember they weren’t in their right mind ………
Once again jail is not a place you want to be so I’m not sure how corrupt somebody can be in the mind plus I noticed you said you were born in 89 you’re a toddler when this happened back then the rules were different for how long you would be in jail he turned himself in and is able to get out now but the question is if somebody else were to do that same thing right now in 2023. Would they have life or if they turn themselves in when they get out at a certain time?……
I’m praying right now for you blessings and for the Lord to guide you and give you peace of mind.
thank you so much for letting me share I hope I made sense I’m sorry if I didn’t and I’m sorry if I ran my sentences through and through,sorry about that……and I’m so happy for you you have a beautiful family and wow you’re about to get a nice house that’s amazing God is good much love to you and your family love the hunni gang ❤ … God always blesses us through the most of the storms
I'm proud of you for finally sharing your sentiments. I feel for you and I am still here for you. I feel just like you in the sense of not knowing how to feel. Love you!
You seem like a sweet person ☺️
First I want to thank God that you survived Everything that you went through and that you are still here and are in amazing spirits you are an amazing man , husband and father 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Second I have never lost a parent but my father did go to jail for a good portion of my life for selling drugs I was blessed to have a stepfather which he is amazing man and I thank god for him . When it was time for him to get out I went a lot of emotions I still kinda young so and god was still working on me on forgiveness , What I’ve learned it’s for you more than it is for them , I do agree with you on not letting him see you family take you time ask God to give you the strength you need in every aspect of this situation I am praying for you and your family mentally spiritually emotionally even physically in the name Jesus 🙏🏾🙏🏾
Thank you for sharing your story and being vulnerable. While I’ve never experienced anything like this, I did have an absent father who caused a lot of drama, pain and suffering throughout my life. He passed away in 2020 and I didn’t feel any remorse or sadness for him. I went to his funeral out of respect but to me he was a stranger and hearing other people tell me how I should feel even made me more upset. I recently learned that forgiveness doesn’t mean reconciliation and that everybody deserves love but access has to be earned. Do your best to protect your peace and your beautiful family. Sending you prayers, love and light on your journey.
I wouldn't forgive or allow him in my life. He killed your mom. It's okay to honor your mother and not associate with her killer.
I’ll be honest, I’ve never experienced close to your situation but I personally have my own family members that I do not speak to.
In your instance, I kind of feel like you should be free to set boundaries. In regard to your children. I think it’s a hard no. Why? Because he doesn’t seem to understand that you cannot just apologise for his actions and expect people to move on. You grew up with a mother figure but you never actually had YOUR mother. Especially because it’s a way that you cannot really get closure for that. He needs to understand what YOU lost and not the time and family he lost.
His family has every right to wash their hands off him because I can only imagine they had a relationship with your mother too. They know what was lost in her passing. For him to be around your children, you and your wife is a privilege. He needs to first understand that even seeing you as a grown man is a privilege. These are things that he gets but your mother never will.
The fact you’re even contemplating is amazing and shows your strength but at the same time you are allowed to not be strong.
My own personal experience of loss was not something I felt until I grew up and started realising the things I missed out on and will never have.
Take as much time as you have and don’t feel like there is a right or wrong answer. I know this wasn’t really much of the answer you wanted but I felt in my spirit that I had to say something.
You are VERY loved. Not just by your family but the people who you put smiles on growing up. I have my own traumas and I remember when I first heard about your mother. All I could think was ‘if he could do it, I can too’.
You are an exemplary human being and anything you feel is valid.
I am so sorry 😢that you had go through this. 😢
I’m only 8 mins in so far but them “just take the kids” ass people be people with no kids! It ain’t easy just “taking the kids” no damn where 🤣..especially the beach lmao. I be exhausted by the time I get my ONE to the car on the WAY anywhere… babyyyyyy.
Ok carry on lol.
Forgiving him doesn't mean he needs to be in your life if you don't want him to. Seems like he will bring negativity energy to you. You should keep him at a distance.
Did B5s mom adopt you? Who raised you after your mom and how did you get to be in the group B5?
Adrian is dad sister his aunt
I haven't yet gotten to the segment about your mom, but from what you've said so far, I think I have a small idea of what you will discuss concerning her.
And I want to say I feel bad about what all you and/or your mother had to endure 🥺
Didnt know my guy watches Ralph the Baker lol
🙏🏾
Wow
Ridge Davds
Ri🎉😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😢
I commend you for sharing this. I am sure it was hard and is hard whenever you think & talk about it. I don’t think anyone would judge you if you felt like you wanted to talk to him.. it’s so hard to forgive people even for such simple things. Take your time & continue to heal in whichever way you feel you need to. & be angry if you want to.