ADHD Time Blindness - The Black Hole Explained.... 😱
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
- ADHD time blindness is the tendency to not pay attention to the passage of time. It's a huge thing for ADHDers and our time blindness impacts our work, our relationships and can erode our confidence and reputation.
So why do we have time blindness and what do we do about it? That's what we're taking about in today's video.
Let me know if this is something you struggle with! As someone with high anxiety - it's not a huge issue for me, but I still have my days....
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My adhd is having me watch these video on how to manage my adhd instead of doing what I need to do...
Saaaaame.
YESSSSS
And also having to go back a few minutes MULTIPLE TIMES because I zoned out and missed the last tip. 🙄
😂 ditto 😅
The “out of sight out of mind” thing is the worst, I sometimes forget my friends exist
I do that too..
Same!!
I do that too... and feel so bad about it...
Bro everybody forgets their friends exist, that’s called “being unconscious of something” and it’s occurring with 99.9% of things you know, RIGHT NOW. It’s happening to everyone. You’re spending a good portion of your .1% consciousness to focus on what you’re currently unconscious of. That’s okay for a bit, but it’s time to let go and spend that .1% on the present moment, it’s okay. Part of living in the present moment is thinking or planning for the future. Part of it. But real life is in the present, so don’t let the voices stop you from doing what’s important in front of you. And don’t ignore the thoughts when they help you and remind you about what you’re forgetting. Give yourself time to adjust. It’s okay
At least you have friends to forget about and then remember. 🤷🏻♀️
Yes. My to do lists are graveyards of regrests. Good description.
Yeah, it really resonated with me due to my own to do list...
Great tips. Just this week I was trying to figure out how to make time from disappearing. I’ve tried alarms on my phone but there are so many that as soon as one goes off, the stop gets swiped and I ignore what it means and just keep doing what I was doing or want to be doing anyway… and then days, weeks, months disappear. Frustrating when you actual want to get stuff done.
I know how that goes!
Oh my gosh me too! The timers- the alarms! I just shut it off and ignore what it was meant to remind me of- usually because I’m doing something I’m not supposed to be doing!
I feel like I only have 3 time references: Now, Later (some far off time far, far away) and
OMG, I'm out of time, I'm late, I'm late!
I am always in the future and I always think of how I did not accomplish my goals despite that I had all the time. My sense of time has always been as if I either flashforward or flashback, never in the present and never committed. I always start late and I have delayed everything from career, studies to exercising, completing games or reading books that I never did years ago and then I question myself how I got in the present and what I did.
hhh me too
I came back to this comment. How did 8 months just pass?
I came back to this comment. I cannot watch this video completely due to ADHD.
I returned to this video. I had stopped at 11 two months ago. She described how I truly experience time. I am always time warping and I feel I am in a black hole. This week just went by and I am now trying to rush at several things to feel that I least accomplished something this long weekend.
The time tracking thing was illuminating for me! i thought it took me 10 min do my morning routine, but it actually takes 30 minutes.
The timer experiment can work the other way too: sometimes you’ve been dreading a chore - say, cleaning your toilet - and putting it off because you think it will take soooooo long to do. But then you start, and use a timer, and find out it took a lot less time than you thought… it was actually quick! So there’s no reason to dread it anymore.
I find that my mental image of how long something takes is more related to the number of steps in the task, than to the actual amount of time spent doing it. So while I’m in the act of: putting on gloves, pouring the cleaner in the toilet bowl, spraying the seat, spraying the lid, brushing the bowl… it seems like it is taking forever. But when I can see how much time has passed, it really hasn’t taken as long as it feels because each step is really so small! By contrast, when I think of something as one step, like I “just” need to make dinner… then it feels short but it ends up taking much longer in “real” time!
This is a great explanation.
I'm late to work every single day. Every single day. I think I've already been accommodated. I never knew it had a name!!
I'm an engineer and often need to look up specs on materials or equipment. This task can easily become a time blackhole. I have a countdown timer that I just rotate to start at preset amounts of time. Whenever I need to look something up online I set the timer to 5 or 10 minutes and I'm out.
Otherwise, I'd spend the next hour checking out all the supplier's other products, reading their 'About Us' page, looking at the google Street view of their building, or checking to see what houses are selling for in that area.
I am so desperate to find a way to change the way that I look at time it’s affecting my life in every single aspect. It’s negatively affecting my family relationships, my friendships, my romantic relationships, my ability to be a successful as possible in the current nursing program that I’m in and I just need a way to change it and I have not come across more than just advice, rather than steps of how to work on this in the hundreds of podcasts that I’ve watched. However, your method sounds like a very useful way to begin the process.
I’m starting this time tracking exercise today. I will update you thank you for this.
Whenever I concentrate on a specific task or thing, time appears to stop....that is, until I look at the clock!
Interesting Idea about documenting the time for tasks. I am often late for work because, I always think, Oh, I have time to inspect that "shiny object" that showed up 5 min before I should be getting out the door. The shiny object could be external or internal. So, I'm going to try setting a "warning" timer. Basically, it will go off when I need to prioritize actually getting my butt out the door, and serve as a reminder that, whatever the distraction is, it can be addressed some other time.. I hope this works, I could lose my job...
I've been time tracking my whole week in 15 minutes increments. I have a printed excel spreadsheet that I take with me and jot down notes of what I did a few times a day. It's fascinating and helps me see the whole week at a glance. It also helps me feel more connected to all of the events of the week and understand the ebb and flow of my energy levels
.... I've had to rewind this 3x because I zoned out😊... I'm going to attempt this tonight (I work nights)... 🙃
Just got diagnosed last week - 33 years old. Time blindness has been a revelation. I have found myself in a lot of hot water because I think a project will take 3 months when it actually takes 6.
I had to subscribe because I'm exhausted by my symptoms and need help overcoming my issues, especially work related and relationship concerns.
Caren Magill.....this is the first video of yours I've ever seen ...I am 2 minutes in ...and I just want to say....that I think I love you. Lol. Not in a weird creepy way....haha but you get me! I finally feel less crazy....I know I'm a little nuts....but at least now I know I'm not alone! You sound JUST like me! Thank you for the info I've been trying to implement all the things you talked about I've just had a hard time ACTUALLY doing it! I hate time! I swear I will think it's only been 15 or 20 minutes and in reality it's been an hour+.....also why is it that whatever it is that's at the top of my to do list ...is the absolute last thing that I want to do. If I only need to idk dust everything and hang up clothes ...I swear I will scrub the grout if my tile floors with a toothbrush and detail my fridge and other more difficult tasks...but I will NOT dust or hang my clothes. And vice versa. If floors are on my list I'll be dusting or mowing the grass why can't I do the thing I'm supposed to be doing? No self control/discipline? Or fear of failure/success? Sorry this is so long but I feel like anyone that truly has ADHD has the tendency to write a novel instead of just a comment...I apologize for my chaos 😬😮💨
I write the novels in chapters. I think it helps me but not the few readers who are literate enough.
Would love to see a response to this quirk. I find myself with the same issue. Whatever I actually need to do gets pushed off for smaller or more interesting tasks first. Then I’m back in the same loop the next day. Ugh!
I was literally just looking at a post I did on IG about doing something for your Future Self TODAY.
My issue is that i can do, to my knowledge, the exact same thing and it can take between 10-40min depending on the day even when i are on task. I can drive a certain way, no speeding or driving slow and i can take twice as long! So how will it help if i clock myself when the time while still focused are so different? This doesn't even include when i get distracted! I have cried so many times knowing my boyfriend will ask "where have you been you were sitting in the car, i heard you start the car. All you were supposed to so was get gas and go home". I try so hard and i swear all i done is drive the normal 10-15min to gas station get gas and 10min back. It can take me 60min with safe and not driving under/over the speed limit and the same route! This happens even when i have someone on the phone so i know im not blacking out or anything like that. It's like someone is playing me by moving the clock. And don't get me started on grocery shoping or get from the house to the car. Don't know how to fix it and so many videos explain it as us adhd don't having the patience to wait, can't see what we need to do tomorrow or simply don't think it's important enough. I cry every week over my inability to be on time. Get so anxious that i don't sleep if i have an early appointment. By don't sleep i mean less than 60min total and all erupted sleep. I care, i plan and i try so hard. I'm not unwilling, lazy or to impatience. Time just disappears...
So great meeting you today 🍎… This is so helpful. I’m going to try this tomorrow.
Hey Sarah!!! Great meeting you too. I'm typing this on my speedy new laptop :)
I make to do lists all of the time, but rarely get them done! My wife also gives me to do lists, I have problems getting them done as well.
I get things done when it’s crunch time last minute.
This video was so spot on with me! Wow. I cannot believe how accurate this video is for me! I’m 54 and am just finding out I show a lot of ADHD behavior that I had no clue existed in me until my wife pointed it out to me.
And yes about the time! Omg! My wife says I am so slow getting things done. The one thing I’m good at it is being somewhere before I’m supposed to be! I always early!
So this video is so refreshing! I’m finally figuring out why I am the way I am after over half my life is gone!
Thank you!
Thanks! This helps a lot! As a creative I have this weird dance with time: I'm constantly trying to create large blocks of it, so I don't have to think about it!🤣 Your suggestions will help me in that regard.
Having ADHD is like lugging around a heavy trunk full of dead weight! And we literally have to think about how to think with a brain that doesn’t want to think ???😳
I wonder if you could look into revenge sleep procrastination or revenge bedtime procrastination?
yes!
I don’t watch any personal improvement videos on how to get things done, how to improve such-and-such in your life, etc. unless they’re written specifically for ADHD minds.
It's hard to stick to these instructions! Restarted thw vid a couple of times. Lol
Advice given by Neurotypicals always lands flat. Like, thanks Sharon but I've tried all that and more. Meet the pile of planners half full in my sitting room
It's like a Navy fighter pilot asking an accountant for advice on how to land on an aircraft carrier in a storm at night.
Very interesting time about time... acknowledgement. Well... I know I won't apply the second part of this great tip (the implementation on a To-Do list) but I'll share what I have already done with this idea. It came after watching a very improbable movie: The Equalizer. Anyone know? With Denzel Washington? He had a very visually attractive wrist watch with a timer/stopwatch that he would start right before wiping out all of the bad guys. Probably, Robert McCall was also an ADHD'er (lol). He would say "9 seconds" after evaluating the situation, and - always - after 9 seconds, every one would be dead.
So I started applying that in the most common place: a kitchen (without bad guys!). So I started tracking time (how long it takes to boil my veggies... or an egg?) and I started to start a timer on my phone whenever the water started to boil. So, from that specific moment, at a specific determined time... it would be always boiled. Now I know that after 5 minutes in a frying pan, it's time to flip the slices of potatoes or pumpkins... and in fact I always find those already golden from one side. So... I guess this also might be the universal cooking-basics technique, but it applies to what Caren was suggesting here, to focus. Now I rarely let my veggies boiling for too much time... and I save gas!
So... I guess I should have already applied the same to everything else... and place it on my schedule. It might work... Let's set a timer to check how long I'll take to do that...😅
My life feels like one long never ending day and I can’t tell the difference between two days ago and two weeks ago 🤷♂️
Alternative system that might help some: use a simplified clock instead of regular time. Ideally with something that is able to interrupt you so you wont have to think about time, the system will interrupt you itself and you just think about time in the moment it interrupts you. It's not too unnatural, think about how the sun does the same thing if you actually stay outside all the time (the sun doesnt have hours, just a set few important positions).
Example: starting from the hour you want to wake up set an all-week alarm at 90 minute intervals (I use greek letters, so "Lambda Time", "Xi Time" etc), each alarm with its own abstract name and a not-too-annoying sound, preferably not something that actually sounds like a wakeup alarm (unless its your wakeup alarm). Finally assign some "speed limits" to some blocks in your mind or other special rules. Such as in the block right before you sleep, eat or do some important chores. You cant do anything that will take your brain into top gear or you'll crash the night/chores/etc by being unable to turn your brain off, or to use a car anology, you cant make the tight-turn or stop at a crossing in time if you're at maximum speed. Just do small things with low effort or gear down in the block before to satisfy the limit of the next block. Think of it as similar to meditation just not as extreme, you just focus down.
Also,
- ONLY stop the alarm when you PHYSICALLY task switch off your current thing; if you're still thinking of the current thing, DONT stop the alarm no matter how long it runs (think of it as the hand-breaks)
- you can adjust things to be shorter or longer then 90min (I just like 90 minutes for concentration), just keep them consistent; you can just look at the next alarm name to know which block you're in
- you dont have to do just one thing per block but you should respect them as boundries; dont start some long process if the block is nearly over
- consider every time your little alarm is running with out you switching over yet as a small failure you need to work on (large failure if it stops itself from running too long)
- consider any time you spill over or break the time block rules a large failure and think about what you need to do (its fine to just have bigger blocks, so long as its intentional)
- learn to "forcefully push the breaks" when you have to, to avoid messing the block order, even when its unconfortable
I’m waaaay off all the time! I think I got it but I never do 😂 and I came up with a kinda similar thought as you’re presenting in the video… but it is flawed . I set timers to get things done to “keep track” of the time but that never really works , because I keep hitting “snooze “ and spend a lot of time doing the thing anyways. But what you’re recommending really is working with reality, really finding out how long it takes… at least for the routines tasks… thank you
What I hate about adhd is Ivbeen diagnosed 65 years old and bipolar2
It gets worse as you get older.
I find it difficult to clean house
To get motivated can't sleep don't take meds physiatrist want your brain rattling with drugs they don't care about the harm the drugs cause I'm depressed alot.
I don't even need to time myself, in my notes my morning routine is 30 minutes. Looking back to this morning it was around 2 hours 😂
I literally just set my alarms as I was watching this video…
I don't think I have ADHD..... but a lot of things hit home
At 10:53 is the true reason. Don't say you can't manage time. Just say you don't want to manage time. Life will be so much easier. 😉
She doesn't say that at 10:53 or anywhere. She said we want to spend our SPARE time relaxing, not doing something for someone else. For those of us who haven't managed our time and are holding a lot of shame, we DESPERATELY want to know how to manage our time. We still need time to wind down and de-stress.
Over 70 years, most undiagnosed, at last I'm finding helpful information instead of the "inattention" , lack of focus lie.
Fantastic. Thanks for sharing
Your channel is fantastic ❤❤❤❤❤❤
I do the time tracking and have my morning set up before work and I use my phone for my timed appointment reminder through out the day whether its a calendar reminder or or an alarm going off. Time management is big for me in a kitchen environment. Without them my time management skills are shit.
Always far to early get seriously stressed if I'm late can't do one thing at a time
Never been told I'm ADHD but always far to early get very stressed if late and can never do one thing at a time
UGH! Now I understand why I could never answer my bosses question when she asked how long did this or that task take you?
I saw your comment on Bria Jones short, saw your username and immediately subscribed!!! I don't even need to watch the whole video (but I will) to know I'm going to send it to all my friends so they finally "GET IT" hahahhaaha 🤣
Ha! Welcome!!!
Sure I remember what I wanted to do - if I'm currently aware that there was something I wanted to do. Things I've done for years, like pray, get ready for work, eat, etc. get done. Other than that I tend not to be aware (consistently at least) that there's a task I want to do, unless something external generates a reminder. And no, it doesn't matter whether it's something I'm interested in. So I leave the task on the table where I'll see it - with all the other tasks I need to remember.
my time feeling sucks, most of the times it took double or triple as guessed up front.
1 task a day
Trust me!
This is the advices I came up with for my wife. She needs to do them though 😅
I am going to time track. Great advice.
Im challenged with accurately estimating how much time rasks would take.
You're literally describing my life here.
I use a lot of alarms and timers, but I don't take anything with the timer or a clock in with me into my bird room. My aviary is the most peaceful space where I feel a sense of awe and wonder that is very difficult for me to get in the working world.
Trying this!
10:58 Lol that's me!!! 😀
Psychologist who has some expertise in ADHD. I am over 70 and have what my friends and I call a senior brain. Finding myself experiencing ADD like issues.
I know it takes me less than 5 minutes to empty the dishwasher & less than 10 minutes to clean the tub!
You say that ADHD brains are basically fast and chaotic, but my brain feels the opposite most of the to time, I take a long time to think and work through things and I constantly space out or ruminate. That is mainly why I lose time and take forever to do almost anything. Would that still be ADHD? Not sure if I have it or not, as I connect to some of the symptoms but not others. But time management has always been a struggle and seems to only be getting worse ☹️
so all of these ideas are great, but how do I manage my adhd with my ocd......i feel like they battle each other in my head??
I have lost 2 jobs now because I have trouble leaving my house due to my time blindness and ocd checking, counting, smelling for smoke, then I am late for everything in my life.
I can't even get to bed when I want to because I'm so distracted and then all the counting.
I guess I need to go to therapy 😉
Hi Caren! I don't subscribe for many channels, but I did right away for yours.
Here's something I've never heard about in my 25 year ADHD journey: "gut check" what is gut check how long things really take? gut check... gut check...gut check.... sounds prefrontal cortex..... can you elaborate a bit using other examples from what's in the video?
By the way, in one of my first long term ADHD programs, I did Social Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Adults with ADHD through the Mt. Sinai School of Medicine in NYC. Time tracking was one thing they tried to teach us earlier on in the 6-8 week program. It was honestly really hard.
Hey! Great question. And really - it's not a gut check at all. It's a reality check. I.E., how long does it take you to get ready in the morning. Instead of assuming it takes 30 mins, actually time it. Then you'll see if you're someone who overestimates or underestimates time. Or maybe you're spot on! If that's the case - you probably don't struggle with time management that much.
Does that make sense? Thanks for subscribing!
I hate alarms and even have my phone on vibrate all the time.
I have a commitment to do something in 2 hours, so the time between now and 2 hours I accomplished nothing and get to my commitment a half hour early, somebody please explain this to me?
OK, this is going to make me very unpopular among people who watch this video. But here it goes. I'm diagnosed ADHD, but I don't suffer from the things mentioned in this video. How is that possible? Discipline. I took responsibility and trained myself. Was it difficult? Yes. But everything that is worth anything is difficult. And my brain DID get better at managing time. Without alarms and reminders. If you give in and submit to the idea that you don't possess the power to change how you do things, you've already lost the game. The touchy-feely nature of our current society tells you that you're perfect just the way you are and you just need to arrange things to work around that. I'm here to tell you that this frame of mind is horse s***! The numbers just don't add up. Everyone can and should improve their current condition. Complacency breeds failure. You will never reach your potential by resting on your laurels and letting a setback make you its slave. Instead, you need to flip the script and make that setback your b****. If I can do it, so can you.
Need another instance? I'm also a recovering heroin addict. I struggled through it off and on (though, in truth, it was massively mostly on) for 22 years. I started when I was 15. Now I'm three years and a little under two months clean. I beat that as well. So let me state my final thoughts. I conquered two giants in my 40 years of life. And those conquests overlapped. So I have to ask because I'm really curious. What's your excuse?
Huh, I think my mom has adhd. Like everyday she does things she overpacks gets side tracked and makes everyone late in the process.
Yes, I am going to do this. I've been wanting to for a long time but just haven't. Typical.
According to your video, I just diagnosed my fiance with ADHD. I am the opposite and don't understand some of his ways😂😂😂.
Thank you. ❤❤❤❤
Thank you! Have you posted the temporal video? Searching for it
Yes I have
Oh my goodness...maybe this is me, and it has a name. 😮😅
😮omg i just woke up ,last time i looked it was 1996 😮
So, are employers supposed to not fire people for showing up late using adhd time blindness as an excuse?? I see people who dont have the condition using it as an excuse for being lazy and not getting punished. I also see doctors taking bribes to get lazy people letters saying they have this condition.
But what was that vignette of a woman with hand movements around five minutes in?
I found out in late adulthood that I had add. It’s a good thing I never knew anything about it until then; it just wasn’t a category. I fought against “IT” my whole life, beginning in childhood and was able to accomplish quite a number of astounding things that I never would have been able to had I known I had this disability. I’m working on a third career but it’s much more difficult than anything I’ve done before because I realize it should be almost impossible. O, the irony.
Always an excuse for everything these days to remove any accountability. “Time blindness” 😂
Thanks!
Thank you Rob! You're the first to do that here and while I never expect it, it's a nice gesture. I appreciate you.
@@CarenMagill you're very welcome. Your advice and information has helped immensely
I know you said ambient but ambien too ...
Why do you have to bring French fries into this
Wow I am so thankful your video came across my page! Thank you 🙏🏽 this was amazing 🥲
Thank you so much!! Glad you're here.
Time is invisible.
Question: how can we manage something that is invisible?
make it visable.
It's not really invisible. We just have a harder time keeping tabs of it.
Your heartbeat is invisible yet easily managed.
No disrespect intended. I know how tough it is to deal with ADHD and also create videos for people. However, your target audience is people with ADHD and need help - don't make your videos longer than 5 minutes. And if the content needs to exceed 5 minutes, then you just separate the advice and give yourself credit for two videos.
Just be on time and quit making goddamn excuses. Regardless.... You can at least read ac watch and benon friggin time.
What can be done for millennials that use "time blindness" as an excuse for entitlement and for nul accountability?!?
Be more specific
I dont know, all this junk seems like its Future Steve's problem : )
- Steve
I found this helpful. I wonder how many other men are secretly watching these? 😉
I'm glad you found it helpful! I have a lot of male viewers. They are totally welcome here.
📬📬📬
Loss interest due to the long intro
Wait to watch until she finds out she also has autism?
I've thought about that
@@CarenMagill I figured out autism on my own but needed a psychologist to point out my ADHD. Stats say you have a 40% chance of autism. Those with autism have 70% odds to have attention deficit.
Has no one heard of phones and alarms ? Lol the literally device to help remind you of objectives ..like set an alarm ⏰️ that says "hey get shit done " lol what a load of rubbish
So you mean a To-do list that screams at you again & again when you're already behind schedule? Great advice.🙄
BTW, Why are you picking your nose in your profile picture, kinda weird dude?