The worst part about being the “quiet kid” is that everyone assumes the worst and think you’re a school shooter or something terrible like that. I hated that so much
I never assumed the quiet kids were school shooters. I just assumed they were quiet because they were sick and tired of everyone’s BS. The racist “dark humor” jokes, the unfunny class clown “antics,” the comments that *very certain* classmates (everyone has known at least one) make that was borderline sexual harassment, and don’t forget the kid who LOULDY AND OBNOXIOUSLY MOANS IN CLASS! Yeah, that’s exactly what I went through. I just want to have ONE normal school day, but it’s just impossible. The only reason I tolerated school was because there was a small amount of teachers and classmates who were actually worth being around.
I used to be like this back in middle school, I never really talked to anybody or attended social gatherings so everybody always joked about me being a school shooter, and that felt disrespectful because what my small friend group said about me and most of the things I did around the time contradicted that, I was just annoyed that I had to wake up that morning, and I was always surrounded by people I didn't like to spend time with. I'm a sophomore in high school now, and I'm getting advice from my girlfriend on how to be social and I'm trying my best to follow her advice, and it's actually worked. Last week, I actually made a friend on the bus because she wanted to get to know me and I accepted her offer, and it was actually really refreshing. I've realized by like the past week or so that I actually enjoy spending time with people and having conversations, and it makes me wish that Covid never happened so I would've remained a social kid. My extroversion completely derailed and got destroyed because of Covid, and at first I thought it was great because it meant I didn't need to go to school, but I never really went outside much and I didn't really interact with my family members unless it was for something important (I still don't).
social anxiety and just anxiety as a whole is so dehumanizing. you feel like you're on stage in a full venue when you're simply just talking to a stranger, you feel stupid when you talk about your interests and hobbies, you feel ugly when you have a slight imperfection on your body and it leads to shutting people out of your life, avoiding being perceived and putting on a facade to blend into a room and avoid judgement. you feel lesser than others and to avoid this feeling of being lesser than human you don't go around others. you avoid crowds, parties and events. everything feels so difficult and eventually leads to depression. it took me 4 years to realize that i need help and another 4 years to actually act on it and i'm doing a bit better now. i still have extreme social anxiety and can't talk to strangers but improvement is always a step in the right direction, no matter how small. good luck to those battling any anxiety and/or depression. you are loved, cared for and the person who lights up the room. keep going, take breaks and reflect.
Blows my mind you're only 18. I'm 22 and feels like everyone's ahead of me socially. Thankfully it's a learned skill, and I've witnessed introverted, anxious people adapt, overcome to be liked, respected, and relatable.
21 here, and were not really introverted but we're either forced or manipulated like he said. People who didnt go through what we went through are out here worrying what other people think and require other people for their entire happiness and joy...
High schooler here, I definetely get what you mean. I wouldn't consider myself an introvert, just really bad at talking to people and being myself. It almost makes you feel like you're a child, too dumb or young to connect with people. I've heard that stuff like this can spring up from childhood trauma and stunting your development, so seeking help to try and come to terms with anything from your past might help. I also agree with that mindset, let's remember that we're not alone. There are people that we can relate with, and there is a way out. Stay safe yall 🙏
20 here. It really sucks to look back on my high school years. That were supposed to be “the best time of my life” but I was miserable. Problem is that when you’re the quiet kid people assume you’re okay with it and purposely leave you alone. They think that you’re exactly where you want to be
i’ve just entered high school and I couldn’t relate to this more, I don’t know why but I feel this sort of guilt from not being able to socialize as much as a normal teenager.
@@edieag hey man, im 20 yrs old now and I felt the same way during my high school experience... it CAN get better, only if you want it to. Remember that you can control the way you think and that is all you need really. Just remember that you're not alone!
@@edieag dude I feel the exact same. I feel like there’s something wrong with me that I can’t make friends or just come across as a normal person lmao
I was the “ shy girl “ in my class in primary school I used to overthink about little things and always feel like I’m making a fool of myself and I’m ugly and all that stuff. My old friends really got to me about my acne so I stole my mums makeup but I wasn’t a make up artist at 11 so I went to school then embarrassed myself more..I always feel like people think about me in a bad way and I still overthink at night I used to cry myself to sleep. The quote of the day “ you know my name not my story “ bye guys!! ❤❤
Aw are you ok now? I felt different from others because my friends didn’t wear makeup but I felt compelled to wear makeup in year 11 because I was tired of people picking on me in school but either way I didn’t know how to use it either and made a fool out of myself actually too. I’ve learnt im mad im not learning as quicker as all the other girls doing makeup then again, I have to remember I only started doing it like 4 months ago but I’m always self critical and hard on myself despite learning as much skills as I’ve tried to learn from my age. I’m trying and that’s atleast what matters and others just haven’t grown up to wear makeup but I have to remember. We all grow up differently and it’s ok to outgrow even from your friends, because you’ve learnt somethings and grown up more than they have. And I learnt this from watching sis vs bro and karina outgrowing Ronald even though karina was cutting her hair and trying something new because she felt a lot of pressure from everyone bullying her on RUclips she moved on from sis vs bro and I want that too. If I wear makeup at a young age that’s a sign of growing and maturing but don’t feel scared to do that unlike me.
@@angelar9759 Guys can handle cold water and not scorching hot. Well I cant. Women like hot water and hate cold. Just dont let products influence ur entire life or beauty yourself , be it more natural products or worser ones
Brother I am 17 right now, for the last month I was drowning in nostalgia and I was worried about my future and was really depressed. Then I found your channel , it is really helpful. Thanks Brother
@@yourblack2798having nostalgia is good but being obsessed with it and not letting it go is SERIOUSLY bad, sure it feels amazing but the distractions it does prevents all sorts of developments
I am the quiet kid too, but I am trying to become more communicative since I got into a new high school. It's been really difficult to get over myself but I believe I can do it! Thank you for helping us as a generation, you're changing lives❤
Wish I could "get over" my social anxiety before I left school. I just left, turning 17 in December and now I'm worried about what I'm gonna do since I missed most of secondary school and all together, only went for like.. not even 100 days, all throughout those 5 years. Can't go to university, get a job, nothing. Wish I was still in school so I could try to become more communicative too and actually possibly have something to do with my life (weird a 16yr old saying that, but yk lol). Sorry for yapping
27 year-old Finnish man here with diagnosed Autism, ADHD, language developmental disorder, anxiety disorder, OCD and PTSD. This video resonates me deeply. Because of my autism and that I learned to speak not until 3 years old, from kindergarden up until 9th year I was almost constantly bullied and ostracised. Because of that, not only did I became a vary withdrawn and chronically lonely person, I lost all those years in social and mental developmental development. It wasn't until I realized I had a pornography addiction that I realized I needed to do something about it: better myself and reach out for help. Even after one year of finally finding my peers and starting to learn social skills, and gradually gaining confidence around people, I still feel developmentally behind my peers, which sometimes has felt hard. Nevertheless, I am glad that I found a fellow sufferer who I can relate to, and share my similar experiences with him and others. I hope this helps.
I don't feel alone, it always feels like you are behind the 8 ball socially and even learning how to feel and be present. I love that you have gradually found your way💜
College female here. I relate to this video so much. I am nurodivergent and in elementary school and middle school I had the WORST anxiety. For the life of me I could not be myself. Didn't help that all my "friends" were more like frenemies. You know the type. "Oh I just loveee that handmade sweater your aunt made you! The pocket is... cute." *In private* "Ew she really wore that?" Yeah.... But I finally told may parents about my anxiety and take meds for it now and a dear older friend of mine said I tried to fit in and never could so I finally gave up trying. I think about those words often and it helps. To the 10 year old girl who would walk into school every day sick to her stomach, to a college adult who isn't afraid to wear whatever she wants to her in person classes and speak up? You matter and you did that. Change is possible
@@PrimoProductions Well I don't usually share that information lol but it's a college in Oregon In the Pacific Northwest (: glad you can relate. Or should I say sucks you can relate 🤣
I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I can see how tough you are from all the things you’ve said. I struggled an emmense pressure of ocd just because of what people say about me; and I hid to the point people noticed and I get even more anxious. You’re so strong for this, and we are here for you, you are loved ❤️❤️
@@angelar9759 Thank you for all you said and I;m sorry you also dealt with your own share of anxiety. I don't think being euro divergent costs as anxiety, that's two separate disorders, but it might make the anxiety stronger?
That's not always a bad thing, most of my friends I don't see anymore because they are busy with their own lives and having friends can bring a lot of unnecessary drama
@@BRITdave-so1sl many humans need a social life to not fall into depression. for me sometimes i get depressive periods where i skip schools alot and i feel even worse cause i am not social, but at the same time it makes me feel like i cant be social when in fact i can but taking the step to start going to school again feels hard
Hey, this was really inspiring. I'm 15, and after moving schools for better education, I’ve only made four real friends. I often stutter when I speak and have trouble keeping conversations going, which makes me quieter and more anxious in social situations. I find it hard to start conversations, and when I do, I usually stutter or my face gets red. I try my best to engage with others, but it’s physically challenging. Watching this video has motivated me to change my mindset and work on overcoming my social awkwardness.
Don't think youll see this, but I'm a 14 year old kid, i've always been homeschooled, and I have ZERO irl friends since 2020. None. And when I go to places like the grocery store i get unbelievably paranoid and don't like being around people anymore. I don't know how to get out of this state and I feel hopeless. Especially because I don't go to school and i never have the oppurtunity to meet kids my age. :( (edit: another thing is that i was raised VERY sheltered, and some kids my age are doing stuff that i am afraid of because i never met people like them, part of the reason why i dont meet people. Also my parents are not willing to stop homeschooling me.)
read a book u like no picture nothing and trust me ull find home there. u dont need friends unless they are to help u improve or are willing to in long term. u need knowledge and skills and friends come with that. go to the library, sports clubs, gym. that is were u wanna find real friends, there will be many that will lead you to the wrong path but you will have to find the correct ones. like i said find friends that help u improve not those who entertain u, then u will find entertainment in improvement.
i ended up dropping out of physical high school cause of anxiety. too anyone reading please listen. Stop overthinking social situations because you will realize that people actually want to talk to you.
Middle school was hell because how i isolated from everyone ended up super lonely now im 20 and i regret not trying to break out of that shell way back then, I hope anyone isolated and lonely dealing with anxiety can build that confidence up slowly and use that shit because it’s like a superpower once you get it. Everyone has it you just have to build it.
I was the quiet kid at one point but that was years ago. I do feel bad for some of the quiet kids at my high school who were like you, Jak. I've befriended them, and I'm really one of the only ppl they talk to. I hope any quiet kids out there find balance in their lives, and may God bless you
really feel like crying rn, this video hit home HARD i dont normally comment, but i had to... your video made me aware of my addictions an made me actually realise if I want a better life, i'll need to get rid of them thank you man, God bless
Hey man! 17 year old highschool senior here. I've always been the quiet kid, it's messed with my thoughts (making me feel really insecure) and what I've wanted to accomplish at school (making friends, getting to know teachers, talking to that girl :)). Recently I've been working more on myself, trying to speak up more, and I am happy I'm makin progress but it's kinda been all over the place. Finding your channel has really made me feel not so alone going through all the hell I've been feeling over the years. Wanna thank you for all you're doing. PS: not an avid commenter but man this video made me more conscious of how to approach my life. love your vids brotha.
I'm in 8th grade and going through the same things you are saying in your story. I put a mask over myself in the day and feel disappointed and I feel like I don't fit in. ever since I started to watch your videos, I've been doing better. I've been way more confident in conversations and just around people in general. I can finally be myself. Your videos are making my school years way better than what it was. Also, I saw that you said on one of the comments that you feel like these videos are a waste of time, but you shouldn't think that. Your videos help more people than you can imagine. Keep doing what you love.
You have to change now. Take it from me, im 17. I have always been the quiet kid and because of it now i dont have a social life, its now or never for you to make sure you dont end up like me brother.
@@reubenwest9474 I feel so bad for you man. You don't deserver that at all. I hope you're able to make friends soon. Sending all my love and prayers 🙏❤
2020 ruined it for me personally, was way social but still had some shyness before and after 2020 i completely went into what it felt like a shell i can't leave. even going out for simple things like a quick shop i get horribly anxious and it js doesnt stop
As a 14 year old with social anxiety, I have always been anxious around people at school and literally anywhere else in public. I don't know where it came from but I know it might have been covid or the fact that I had to transfer schools and I haven't been the same I just hope it gets better through time and I am also trying to become closer to Christ, so this video really made me finally relate to something so thanks for sharing your story and I hope anyone else that is going through the same thing to get better overtime.
I was there and I can tell you. It only gets better, even if it hurts and doesn't feel like it at the time. It only gets better. Treat is as your mistakes and experiences build personality and form who you are. It's what makes us, us. Just set a good, clean mindset, ingrain good habits, and just take everyday as it comes and somethings aren't that deep. You become stronger, wiser and more understanding this way. Trust the process and trust every day.
Thank you for your words, feels good to know I’m not the only one as well, so your comment means more than you think. I’m glad you’re enjoying these story vids because sometimes I just feel like they’re a waste of time 😂
@JakPiggott Dude, always! I really enjoy these and I really like what bring out in them and they way in which you do it. Just keep it up and enjoy the process. Cheers bro!
I’m in high school and I’ve always had anxiety (for many family related reasons). My face also turns red but my main problem is that I have trouble speaking. Either I stutter or I physically just can’t get any words out. Currently, I don’t have any close friends. I have people that I eat with at lunch but they don’t speak to me. It feels like anxiety has taken control of everything in my life. At some point I just tried not trying to make friends because it was stressing me out too much but that just led to depression. I would say my anxiety has gotten worse over time. Seeing your videos has been really inspiring to me even during tough times. Please keep making videos. Thank you Jak.
14 year old here, I can relate to this so much its crazy. I would always keep my head down, red face, scared to speak and a lot of anxiety. All of elementary school I was like this... I had 2 therapist and still felt super anxious. I would go to school crying some morning my anxiety was so bad. Now I'm in Sec 3 and connected with God over the summer. My anxiety and fear has been getting better but it never fully disappears. Thank you for sharing your story so I know I wasn't the only one!
Hey since I'm older than you I just wanted to tell you you're really young still at the beginning of your life and anxiety is really common at this age for whatever reason. Everyone has passed through it even if they don't show it or remember but it will go away completely no matter how long it takes so be happy and enjoy every moment and know that it will always get better :)❤
Hey Jak, just wanted to say that as a 16 year old struggling with moving from Melbourne to a completely new area, that your videos have been a lifesaver for me. You've shown me ways to improve my mindset like I had never thought of before, and I just wanted to say thank you, never stop doing what you're doing, because this advice is pure gold that I wish so many other people like me could discover
Wonder is an amazing movie. I read the book when I was younger and I loved it. Made me appreciate the littlest things in my life. *"As long as your actions reflect the character you wish to have, there's no reason why everything won't work out"* I love that
I started suddenly crying and having some kind of panic attack after watching this video, this hit me really hard because ive been living with my anxiety and depression for so long that ive just accepted it. Its the first time in like forever that ive felt atleast a bit of hope and motivation to get better, and that just overwhelmed my emotions. Thank you so much for this video and god bless you. you seem like a great guy
Thank you this has helped tremendously, for me with healing abandonment issues and self abandonment, I have been there and still experiencing it, but the more you learn to work on you and to pace yourself by learning how to rest by meditating, and self reflecting you will meet yourself in ways to which you will no like and to which ways that you will in regards to your strengths and weaknesses.
Bro just described my life. I’m in high school rn and my face does the same thing, small school but still people don’t know me. I get like panic attacks from being nervous talking to people. “Did I say something wrong? They think I’m weird”
just letting you know as someone who is around the age you went through this , you reached the right audience and this has informed me so much and helps alot. You have made a difference thanks man
Same!! One of the most vivid memories of mine. That movie had so much in it, it was the first time that, as a child, I was seeing meaning in a movie. Definitely a turning point
Moving countries and going from an extremely extrovert, outgoing kid to a shy introvert kid really broke me as well. The feeling of not being able to communicate and express myself properly really broke my self confidence level. This channel and this comment section really make me feel safe and makes me realize that im not the only one going through hard times. I really needed this video. Thank you for sharing your experience❤️
Introverts aren’t always shy and introvert isn’t a good or bad thing. Stop with the stupid stereotypes you retard. Maybe you stupid extroverts are just annoying and the “quiet kid” doesn’t want to deal with you.
Thanks so much for sharing your experience, I could really relate to this a year back. When I was starting out middle school I completely went from extrovert to the shyest and quietest person in the sixth grade. I kept my head down and wore a mask all the time, and many times during class and mainly everywhere I would zone out from not talking for so long during the day. I had no friends, and the only place I seemed normal was around family It was horrible, and I'm glad this video could make me relate to it so much. At least now I have been able grow out of this anxiety stage, and I hope anyone else who has problems similar to this will grow out of them too.
Hey jak, I’ve been watching since your first anxiety video, you help me a lot with what I labeled as my anxiety, I’m 19 and finally I’ve been breaking out of my shell, but you also saved me from a darker place than anxiety, which is rather not go into detail, but I’d always watch your shorts, all the way to the end, and feel so much calmer. Love you brother, and I hope you have a great day.
I can relate to this Jak. I used to get bullied when I was younger for being myself, but I've realized all people can be Is theirself. It made me anxious, and I avoided anyone, even my own family. I would isolate all day and doom scroll on tiktok. But I've realized the darkest nights have the brighest stars. Hope this helps, brother. Keep inspiring many generations to come 🙏
This video made me realize we have a lot in common. The anxiety I felt during my teenage years has taught me a lot of lessons. Now that I'm in my first year of college, I intend to apply those lessons. Thank you Jak for making this video and sharing your story. It really reasonated with me
I was the quiet kid my whole life, now I'm 32 and it's basically ruined my whole life. Then i got cancer and it got even worse. I have never had any type of relationship. I found out about the blackpill recently and despite how evil its depicted as online, basically i can tell you from experience that everything those people come up with is 100% true. If you're in this situation it was over from the beginning, people want to gaslight you into believing that it's your own fault and you've somehow had total control over how your life plays out, but when these experiences go back to your earliest memories at around age 3 or 4, how can you expect a child that age to respond in a healthy way to a world that seems to hate him? If this is all my fault, then i was born this way. I've seen plenty of shy kids in my time but they always turn out fine in the end. I have no real friends, i get the feeling most people have been my friend out of pity because they've always seemed like they would want to hide me from "the cool kids", I'm someone that the cool kid would look at once and say "who the fk is this guy", then my only choice is to hang my head and walk away. I've been marked. I've tried every type of self improvement you could imagine, it always backfires and things end up getting worse. Even medications have a paradoxical effect on me. The worst insomnia I've ever had in my life was when i was put on sleeping pills for example. It can't even be over if it never fking began
Ive just turned 16 two days ago, and I have come here to say that this is exactly what I have been dealing with throughout secondary school since year 7. And when I mean exactly, no joke. I had the problem with the red face. My anxiety was so bad. My friends just manipulated me, made me feel so shit. I tried to repress my anxiety, not going out, that gave me social anxiety, depression and I nearly took my life. I felt so hopeless. I say nearly but I probably wasnt gonna do it although I had it set up, and did some ‘practice tries’ to see what it would feel like. If you are reading this, if you have anxiety. Do not repress it. Meaning don’t stop doings you love because of anxiety. Something I struggled with was hygiene, my family did not properly introduce me to this and I lacked the social norms of it, people at school found out I dont shower, was labelled as the smelly stupid kid. I stuck to this label, and accepted it myself , and thought I couldnt do nothing about it , but I can. People even calling me a social experiment because I didn’t know how to defend myself and my feelings, because my family didnt socialise me into doing so and I found it so awkward to do it, and it just felt weird for me. From Year 7 through year 10 , I felt so hopeless, so alone, but that was because I was doing this to myself. Social media too was influencing me on this. I started watching depressed tiktoks, which made me feel even more shit about myself nonetheless people at school as well. Social media introduced me to self harm at age 13. I continued this self harm up until year 9. Then I stopped permenantly. Without social media I would not have done this, as I didn’t know what it even was at the time. And social media really grabbed me and threw me under the water drowning me, those depressing tiktoks making me believe I was hopeless. However you are never hopeless. When you are listening or reading through people’s success stories through TedTalk or some other video, you might think that this will never be you, as you are not the person speaking on the stage. I thought that too. I am not speaking on a stage, but I can tell you for a fact that I do not want to kill myself anymore. When I had a really shit day, after school, I would just leave as fast as I can go into the woods. Find a private spot. And just reflect. Looked at nature and just sat there thinking about the day. Did this on multiple occasions. I had no idea what was wrong with me. Why were people so mean? Here is how I fixed it. First of all. Sleep. Sleep is the key. I experienced ‘brain fog’ everyday, I couldnt think properly, I wasnt myself, I was 50% of myself, thinking through mud. It would take so much power to speak. You kind of feel hungover( I dont know what that feels like but its how I would describe it) when people said something disrespectful to me, I had brain fog and didn’t know how to think, so I just go along with them and laugh about them disrespecting me, they would then continue this everyday, made me feel more shit, but they acknowledged the fact that i did not respect myself which made me very vulnerable.This was when I had no respect for myself at all. I didn’t realise how much people were walking over me and I thought it was normal, no, it wasn’t. 2 self respect. Respect yourself. You are a human being. You cannot be treated like a literal wastebin, thats what I was treated like. Do things for yourself. This really helps. When I bed rot all day because I dont have many true friends, don’t know if I even have one yet still working on it. Treat yourself. For example on the weekend I was bed rotting, so I went cycling to the woods near the motorway, I went along this park with zip lines, in some dark forest , saw a long dirt path , followed it to the end and to my surprise, I found an abandoned private mountain bike trail. This for me was a very proud moment, and to this day I am gonna clear it out and make it even better, my own little treat long term project, which I enjoyed doing by myself. Eventually my anxiety began to slowly vanish when I had self respect, and I didn’t view myself as below anyone. We are all equal and the same. I still have anxiety, but I am more like myself, and not pretending to be someone else. 3. Hygiene. Shower, brush your teeth even if you dont feel like it. You will feel better and more energetic to do the next big task of the day. If you are depressed and don’t bother on self care and have long hair which is never cut and have self esteem. Go for a haircut. I used to look awful. Really awful. Never got A haircut. My hair was like a birds nest, didn’t know how to take care of it as at age 14 I didn’t even know what conditioner was as I wasn’t taught this. So I learnt it myself. My parents didnt teach me this because they taught I was expected to know it. I didn’t though. My looks really impacted my self esteem, probably one of the main reasons why I wanted to die. But when I eventually learnt all these hygiene techniques, I eventually got to how I wanted to be looked at in society. People started to respect me more, even I started respecting myself. People finally perceived me for being myself, not some smelly introvert who has a birds nest. Don’t think, when will this nightmare end. Think, what do I have to do to get out of this cycle? Once you get out of the cycle, you will never want to go back. Last thing, here is a quote which helped me change, because I was too scared to be myself. “You are under no obligation to be the person you were 5 minutes ago” Labelling is when people label you in a certain way , when it is said on multiple occasions it sometimes makes the individual start to believe this. Sometimes they realise they are being labelled and change, sometimes they believe they are stuck. You are not stuck my friend. You can escape. Good luck.
it’s 4 am, i’ve been struggling so hard lately and this made me feel so much better, i genuinely have not felt so relieved and seen right now. ❤ Thank you for this
Hi Jak, i've had a similar teenage experience in terms of anxiety and getting countless red faces in school. All i have to say is that anxiety will never disappear (or at least that's my current belief), as it is an emotion. Some deeply emotional humans like you and others watching this video (including myself) will probably always experience every emotion at its max, whether it be happiness or anxiety. Personally, my biggest goal this year is to try and train myself to be as authentic and as myself as possible in any situation, particularly in school and when meeting new people, as i've always struggled with this for most of my life (i've always been known as the shy and quiet one). Hopefully i'll soon find out if it possible to train authenticity across all social situations. Thanks for yet again another deeply relatable video Jak, and remember it's life to experience all these things so we can learn from them.
Hey bro, I'm 15 and it's been a year since I discovered your channel, I used to get super anxious and I was a pretty skinny kid. Then I discovered your channel, you helped me just a little back then but last month I was starting high school, and you were the first person that came to mind, so I watched one of your videos and it stuck with me for the whole day, it gave me the confidence I needed so thank you for the help you gave us all!
That's good that things have started to improve! The think is adversity and difficult times can help people stronger, better in the future... so I say use the difficult experiences in your past to be stronger, better person in the future! On a different, the videos on the playlist on my channel titled 'Purpose of Life?' might change someone's life for the better!
Thank you for sharing your story! I can relate to you alot, as a wasian australian i struggled with alot of anxiety and loneliness, the internet helped by also hurt me more. I'm older now and have more control of what i let into my head and its good to know that I'm not alone in my experience. It's great to see your online success too.
Thank you for speaking about this! I struggled with social anxiety and i was always the quiet kid in class too, other kids and teacher's will make me feel like there was something really wrong with me for it which lead to me becoming insecure about being quiet and embarrassed, i will try so hard to talk and interact but it was always so exhausting for me and it'll just make my anxiety worse, throughout my entire school life people would make me feel like i have to talk and I'm weird if i don't they'll says things like "you have to get out of your shell" "get out of your comfort zone" or "oh don't worry you'll grow out of it" this just made me more anxious, it wasn't until after hs I found out I have selected mutism, when I found this out I felt a little better, and i realized that It's okay to be a quiet person yk? All this time i was putting so much pressure on myself to change into this extroverted person and waiting for myself to grow out of being quiet, Im 21 now and i finally accepted that I'll never grow out of this because this is just who i am, forcing myself to talk would be like if a extroverted person forced themselves not to talk. And ever since i accepted myself for who i am, my anxiety has gotten alot better 😌
As someone who can relate to you I just wanna say I'm so proud of you bro. You're really brave person the same happened to me when i was 10 years old i got bullied for 4 years i wasn't shy kid at all but when i get bullied i just couldn't understand what was happening i was always saying to my mum why it was me who always massed up with everything than i started hating myself whenever something happen i feel like it was me who caused this i was feeling isolated i didn't know what to do that all triggered me. Day by day I'm feeling drowned I'm 16 yr old now thanks to u your video helped me. And the main point was it was my friends who was like secretly bullying me that time i feels like i was the stupid person to be friends with those.
4:45 - So true, man. This happened to me right before and during covid, then it just continued. Plus, I had worse acne than everyone else my age, so it shut me down. I always felt like I was the only one who experienced this because I didn't see others struggling with shyness or social anxiety. I'm still trying to fix years of damage, but honestly, not much helps.
Me too! I feel you... With corona when i was 14 and now im 19 and still struggling sm with the anxietys and thoughts..ny brain is just used to shutting down and to be anxious. I cant get out of it. Its a cycle it just repeats !
I definitely relate to what you said in the video, Jak. I've always been the "quiet" kid and a more introverted individual. Even at 17 years old, I often find myself anxious around people. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who is the "quiet kid". I always appreciate watching your videos man. 🙏❤🔥💪
Being the nice kid that I was, all it took was one kid to really change the course of how my childhood would be. Later I would become shy, and people heavily took advantage of me and I rarely stood up for my self in fear of getting hurt or getting in trouble. Even though I didn’t have to much trouble making friends in middle/high school, I had a hard time dealing with the constant harassment not knowing how to talk back or not knowing how to deal with them. At 19 years old, I’m currently in college, it’s been a bit difficult. And seeing these videos have helped me feel better knowing that I’m not the only person feeling this way. Ur a real one.
That's crazy, I'm 17 now so not much younger than you. This struck something in me, I've always struggled with my face going red. I've seen your videos for quite awhile now and you've helped me to focus on myself. I related to that movie, Wonder; as a kid. I'm not the prettiest and am overweight so I've made sure to keep out the way of others. Isolating myself, but this, your story hits so close to home. Thank you for sharing this ❤
Jak, just wanted to say thank you bro. Im 21 years old. This video was me when i was in highschool. Acne decided to affect me so bad that I never looked at anyone in the face and was scared to talk to people because they were gonna see my acne, I told my grandma I wanted medication for it.. That made things actually much worse that everyone around me thought something was wrong with me. You dont understand how happy wearing a mask during covid made me while others hated the mask. I felt confident and talked more with everyone....Just for that short while at least.. Your redness was my acne. Those days affect me on how i am today just talking to people. Now im in real estate trying to talk to everyone and I just wanted to say you might be a little younger than me but man do i look up to you as motivation. You talk with so much core values and i thank you bro.
I'm 26, and I have struggled so much with anxiety throughout school. It's become recently harder for me because I need to go find new friends, but I have social anxiety and If I don't know someone there, then I just close off. Watching this video and seeing that I'm not alone, that someone can relate and understand how that feels is really helpful.
I started a new school this year and I haven't made any friends since the beginning of the year. I was always shy, but there were people who took an interest in me at my old school. Now I'm the quiet kid who sits in the last desk in the corner of the room, has no friends and who "would probably start a massacre" according to my classmates. I see the other students hanging out together and having fun and just I can wish I was there with them. Even though I've been called stupid, weird and other things by them, deep down I still have this desire to be part of a group. I feel helpless.
I been in my school for the 3rd year now, I still barely talk with anyone, same problem here, I just don't see anyone having any interest in me, and Im always left out. Stuff is so tough I barely can handle it atp
Feeling the same way, I realized today that I need to take that empty pit and the desire to fill it and use that motivation to create a better version of myself; grow in my faith; work out and sculpt my body. I urge you to do the same. My prayers go out to you brother 🙏
that was me in school. i would go the whole school day not having talked to anyone. Maybe you could try looking for someone who is also shy or on their own and talk to them. I did that on the last day of school and we ended up becoming friends. I just regret that I didn't do that sooner, we could have been friends for years if I had had the courage.
You probably don't remember me, you get hundreds of comments a day. I just want you to know you really helped me and so many more people. I hope there are gonna be more people like you, genuine people...
I’m in middle school, which is 6 grade and I’m glad I took the time to watch this. I can relate so much, I have social anxiety, and type one diabetes. So I can relate so much, every time I would go present my work to the class, standing in front of the class, my hands would go numb, and my blood pressure would just go down , and I started feeling fatigue. I would avoid my symptoms, and try to keep going with my speeches. I had this one friend, named Valentina, she was so nice but when it came to recess, she would try to find other friends to hang out with instead of me, and I was never really the first choice of anybody. I was always the “ last pick “. Valentina would only talk to me, and she wouldn’t do anything else accept talk. She wouldn’t invite me into her team, and with her other friends, she would just laugh at me, and yes this happened 3 months ago, I’m still getting over it. I tried to tell my mom but, I couldn’t I couldn’t bare the fact of losing a friend. She was the only friend I had, and she would joke around and call me lesbian with another girl in my class who kind of talked to me a few times. Then I lost a friend, when I finally told my mom, she went to the school, and my mom and Valentina’s mom were fighting, and I was just the worst of the worst. I felt like absolute failure and garbage. The next day, I didn’t see Valentina in school, but her friends went back to normal, and we’re glad she wasn’t there, they never apologized though. And after that day, I became affected with Social anxiety, and the story above of me presenting my work to the class, was during the social anxiety.
Damn, when i started high school as a junior, things were going good so far. There were two girls and the teacher said that everyone has to present for what we discuss. One of them said if i want to write and i politely said 'no'. I thought that she was going to write this time but she takes it too personal. A few days later, the girls were talking aLOT of shit about me being quiet now. I try to hold my tears but it hurts me too much. Never in my life have i been so humiliated like that. and today, another different girl was making fun of me for being quiet. I did nothing wrong but just be quiet and get the work done
Thank you brother for your Testimony. And you were not yapping at all my dear friend. You were sharing something personal and poured your heart out into this video. Dispite the foul language. And i'm so glad and happy for you that things have gotten a lot better for you over time. Jesus is good. And he loves you greatly ❤ You got this brother. 😊 Never give up.
I also had social anxiety during middle school and high school. It indeed fucked up my youth. I was part of a friend group, but even to them I barely talked. Once I opened up about this struggle with someone from my friend group, I slowly started to be able to be myself around other people. I chose this friend becausr she talked about having a friend with social anxiety, which really helped cuz it would mean she woudnt think I was weird for having it. Fast forward, now I'm in uni and I'm able to make friends 😄😄.
Thanks for the video man. Sometimes I have weeks or even months where I don’t reflect and it does make my anxiety worse. I needed this because it helped remind me that I’m a strong person and I am capable. Thanks bro 💪🏾
God I relate so much to what you’ve shared in this video… I’m 18 at the moment and I’m starting to realise that the anxiety I experience everyday isn’t really normal. I’ve always been quite shy, not wanting to draw too much attention to myself. But my face turns red after any minor inconvenience, and EVERYBODY always feels the need to point this out as if I’m not aware of it myself. And I don’t simply blush - I get bloody red: when I’m doing a presentation in college, when a professor asks me a question and I have to answer in front of my classmates, or even when my family or friends lightheartedly joke about me. I don’t know how, but it got to a point where I didn’t want to show up at uni at all. I don’t really get bullied, but I also can’t form any genuine friendships, mainly due to my extreme shyness. These days I try to fake my personality and act more outgoing than I actually am in order to have some kind of human interaction, but my red face and extreme awkwardness eventually slip through. I have 2 more years to go through at university and I don’t know how I’ll make it when I always dine alone, go home alone, study alone, do presentations alone. I’m really open to finding friends but I simply can’t. My shyness kills me. Does anyone have any tips for me? P.S.: sorry if this was worded poorly. English isn’t my first language and I can sometimes lose track of thought when I speak it.
Everything you mentioned happened to me, Indonesian class we had to come up with a sentence and in Year 6 we watched wonder. Also i always get that red face and everyone saw. Additionally, I had problems in conversations every time i screwed up in a conversation I just thought about it every single week and it went on for a few months to even a year. I later got diagnosed with OCD and anxiety. Thanks for this video Jak, you are inspiring lots of young people. (P.s i hope you don’t mind me venting!)
Bro the red face thing held me back so much in life. After already having my self image fucked up by an alcoholic father, in high school the bullying started as well. The bright red face like a beetroot would always happen and I would be bullied mercilessly by almost every kid in school. The teachers just looked down on me with a mix of pity and disgust. It made me fucking hate my body, hate myself, hate everyone else. Its been a real long journey and it still happens occasionally, i still deal with the fallout, with being too inhibited and shy, nearly 20 years later. I've questioned if I did some messed up stuff in a past life to deserve it. Anyway theres always hope for growth and healing. Thanks for sharing your story
You did nothing messed up, the people around you are the ones who are truly messed up. From what you wrote in the comments you seem like a great guy and I hope I can meet someone like you in the future
Thank you for sharing. I could relate to this a lot. My anxiety really started to become a problem in high school, and my face turning red was a huge part of it. It doesn’t seem like people mention this very much, I always thought it was just because it happened to me worse than everyone else. Every social situation, I had to be careful what I said in case my face turned red. It was my biggest fear and really limited how much I could express myself. I’m in university now and am definitely doing better; still anxious but caring less. My face still gets really red sometimes and it makes me not want to do sports, go to the gym, or be active around people. I plan my day around it so I won’t overwhelm myself and panic in places like class or meal hall where there’s nowhere to retreat. Anyways, thanks for sharing. Nice to know we’re not the only ones who feel this way:)
Also, I see many people here talking about their adhd and asd, which most likely played a role in my experience as well, and why my fear of being disliked left me curled up into myself or acting like something I wasn’t. Also things started to get much better when I got diagnosed and able to accommodate myself.
I can relate to you to. It really makes me happy to see such a young person like you, which is so close in age to myself, to have overcome (mostly) their anxiety. Thank you so much for your content. I can assure you it makes a lot of lifes better, my own one included. Have a nice day bro.
Thanks so much for posting this. I’m 19 years old and currently in therapy for my social anxiety which stemmed from school. All I can say is that it does, in fact, get better - it just takes time and patience. All the best to you. ❤️
When I first found you I thought you were a joke but when I watched your videos I realised how real they are, most of your videos actually helped me so thanks mate.
Thank you for this video bro , i get bullied at school for stupid shit i have done earlier in the past , it feels like everyone talks about me bad and if someone knows what ive done , they wont view me the same . Literally this video was the answer i needed
Hang in there and I know it’s tough. I live with anxiety on a daily basis. Thanks for taking the time to share your experience with us. It’s nice to know I’m not alone.
Thanks so much for uploading this. I know I was late watching this, but this was definitely inspiring for me. Thanks for all you do you are improving the lives of countless people. We appreciate it 🙏!
I'm 13, I live in Australia so the school system is a little different with grades/years. I'm going to high school (Year 7) soon, I've been told that I may have mild anxiety and AuDHD. I've seen your videos on my recommendations lots of times but I usually ignored it because my attention span was turned into a 1 second dopamine hit with TikTok and RUclips Shorts and so I didn't bother watching. I finally decided to watch one of your videos today and I legit almost cried, had tears but never came out. I wasn't really bullied at school but I've noticed people give subtle hints that I'm "different". Weird looks, questions, etc (Keep in mind that this started in Year 5-6). Being the quiet kid was normal for me though, I usually liked to be by myself but that usually depended on the situation. I developed this mindset that everyone thought I was weird and I was different, not normal, and I didn't see that in a positive way. I wanted to be like others, rather than myself. I still have this mindset lingering in my head but after watching this video, I related to you so much. Listening to your story made me feel less lonely and feel more comfortable and realise that I'm not alone. I love you man, thank you for making these videos, they help a ton of people out, including me. I'll definitely start watching your videos more. I struggle with social skills, I honestly don't understand. There seems to be some set of social rules and I didn't get the memo I guess. Trying to fit in is difficult but I'm glad to know that people have similar experiences to me. I might not fit in with the environment around me but I surely do with a certain type of special people :) I've been afraid to share my experience because I'm afraid of people saying "bro youre too young for depression and stuff like this" or "people have worse problems, get over it", although I haven't been told these directly.
Upmost respect big man, always soo assuring to hear how people like yourself go through this aswell and that its almost exactly relatable.. Especially how I found it so frustrating to actually identify what was happening all along, I have to say you’ve gone through alot of bs and actually have a great response and way of dealing with it all currently 😄
Jak, you are kind of that or elder brother that somehow everyone just deserves. You know not the one who keeps you laughing not the one who keeps you sad. However the one that gives you crystal clear advice that we genuinely need in our life. Thanks brother, wish you luck mate.
I'm 17 now and was always an introvert and anxious kid, I never spoke unless I was spoken to, and it always annoyed me when someone asks me why I'm so quiet. My parents tried pushing me out of my comfort zone by making me take part in debaits at my school, but ended up making things much worse, I feel vey uncomfortable surrounded by many people
I mostly relate to your life, and I am 14 and in highschool. I started experiences feelings of loneliness in 3rd grade and I noticed that my friends kept going away from me and isolating for no reason. I was one of the shortest ones back then in elementary, so maybe that could be the reason why people didn't like me much. I was very extroverted at kindergarden through 2nd, but I just became completely introverted in 3rd because of this. Later on, I would have 0 friends in 5th grade which was when I was in zoom class due to covid. I didn't feel stressed out and I felt like I was used to the loneliness. When I went to middle school (6th grade), I found it incredibly hard to make friends, and whenever I tried talking to my past elementary school friends, they would go away from me like they aren't interested in the conversations I am having with them. At this point, I just accepted the fact that nobody liked me, so I didn't even try anymore. I also was 1 of the only few people that kept wearing a covid face mask in the whole middle school years 6th - 8th grade because I felt comfortable with it, and I would feel insecure showing my face and would overthink about how people would react to me. Also, I did get teased occasionally throughout middle school. I did get bullied by some but they stopped bullying me after a week because I had no reaction and I had this "alpha male" personality that he explained. I still have it right now. Change of topic, but, I would never curse or act like a gangster like how others do even today, which makes me look innocent and vulnerable to others. I also am skinny and underweight, and I feel like I really want to gain weight. Anyways today, it's pretty much the same as how I am in middle school except I am taller, I am still skinny, have 0 friends, act like a robot kind of because I'm insecure of how to pose, but nobody teases me just yet. I also have another cause for stress which is my family. My dad would always be in his room with his door shut because he vapes all day in there. He would only come out occasionally to get snacks from the kitchen and he would only say hi to me which is the most he ever talks about to me. On the other hand, my mom is somewhat dismissive when I talk to her about my emotions and sometimes she gets mad at me for it which makes me feel like I can talk to nobody. I am also not comfortable telling my older brother and sister about my life because they'd just see me as a little child with an easy life and with no emotional maturity even though I know so much about life at this point. My cousins also view me as a little child. I am literally always misunderstood by 99% of my relatives. I am not depressed because I don't feel stressed 24/7 but I do sometimes especially when I am overthinking or when thoughts form in the back of my head.
I know it's difficult as I have terrible anxiety too, but seeking for professional help can really help. Ignore people trying to get you down like the person in the replies, I still believe there are good people out there.
@iroapeentertainment5010 Seems like you're pretty insecure. You're disabling comments on your videos, and you haven't posted in 3 years. Just 9 hours ago you decided you would bomb this channel with 26 comments about how being quiet is stupid. That's a stupid way to cope with your insecurities
I can really relate to you, bro. I went to similar experiences Primary school traumatized me, it was what made me friendless and introvert for middle school. Primary school is where I had the absolute worst experiences, my "best friend" became my bully and turned the whole fricking school against me. In middle school I had like, no friends. I was beaten up by "bad boys" and was rejected by the whole school. Atleast I'm in high school now, in the best high school I could ever be in. There are like, no bad boys, people are way nicer. I'm still kinda a bit introvert but I found out I'm actually like, ambivert. At least I don't suffer now, but I still go through some embarrassing moments but it's getting better now. I have hope.
Middle school was actual hell for me, I was suffering from severe depression and with my family constantly trauma dumping and manipulating me into hating my mum it didn’t help. My childhood, my sister would often verbally abuse me, I don’t live with my parents so they couldn’t do anything (I never told mum actually), I lived with my grandparents back then and it’s not like I was neglected or anything but they just never noticed how I felt every time my sister would spat out those hurtful words at me. Because of this I grew up to be the quiet kid, all my thoughts were kept to myself and I never really wanted to speak up unless needed to. My classmates never physically bullied me fortunately but it did feel like they all hated me, I didn’t have anything to redeem myself with either, my grades weren’t high (in fact I had one of the lowest grade in class) and I don’t have the looks to make up for it. My teacher didn’t care either, I don’t think he cared much for the quiet ones, instead putting all his attention to the popular kids. I’m in high school now and I’ve moved over to my parental grandparents side, I haven’t visited the hospital to get re diagnosed but I’m sure my depression went from severe to mild. It’s still there and some days I still struggle to get out of bed but now with new classmates and a much more supportive teacher I’ve started to open up a bit more and participate in class activities. Sure, I still don’t talk much and I don’t think I will because it’s not something I like to do but I’ve learned that it’s perfectly fine and I’m glad that the people surrounding me can understand that. To anyone experiencing depression, I hope you will eventually make it through hard times just like I did, yes the process will be long and tiring but once you’ve found the right people in the right environment, I’m sure things’ll get better. Don’t give up, I’ll be rooting for you:D
I just found ur channel like 2 to 2.5 hours ago and i must say broooooo ur the best brother anyone could ever ask for so the first video that poped up was the "how to stop porn addiction " it was sooo soooo good bro like literally bro like the house concept the foundation n shit bruv, its crazy that how much clearly u can explain things. I feel like watching ur videos are the "ONE LAST GAME" before bed i mean litreally im watching this like 1am and i have school tomorrow but after one video i think i will sleep but another video pops up and i just have to watch that video. And bro trust me u have one of the most soothing voices in the whole world (as i have heard) u seem so dependable even though I've never even talked tp you or met u irl. All i need to say is that u made a very very huge impact on my life even though i have been watching for like maybe 3 hours straight i just want to watch more of ur videos bro. I hope u blow up even moree this generation NEEDS YOU. Thnx for reading this commemt ( i know you will read this comment.)
Bro as someone who used to suffer from severe social anxiety in high school and early college, I can relate to you because these days I feel like I have to overcompensate for all those years I lost. Trying to post new content, trying to gain new followers, wanting attention in social media, and getting extremely jealous when seeing groups of friends. But there's nothing wrong with wanting attention. There's nothing wrong with wanting to have friends. This is just an opportunity to transform our socially anxious narrative into one where you are popular and liked. We need to do action to get those dreams and desires met and break past our comfort zone add chip off more of our social anxiety shell day by day.
Hi Jak. I'm and old guy of 59. I stumbled across this video and it grabbed my by my heart. You see, way way back when I was at school I was exactly like you. My red face, my shyness and my anxiety just like you. You are so brave to tell your story. I could never build up the courage to do it. Anyway, just believe in yourself and fight for what you believe in. My life is ruined through decades of depression and anxiety. Please don't end up like me. Be strong.
your video is really good and like you saw yourself in the "wonder" movie kid, i see myself in you. up until recently i had this big social anxiety and had to get medications for that. like you, i was a very loud and happy kid. during my first year of middle school, the bullying started. at first it was vocal but later turned to physical and had ended up with me being beaten up behind school. the bullying continued for 6 years and it really transformed me into this really insecure person that is filled with anxeity. i am 18 now and that wasn't that long ago but i am working on myself. the work had only started a few months ago but i am feeling and seeing changes. i am finally happy. i am finally more comfortable with my body and my boyfriend really helped me throughout this journey. hopefully i will continue to grow like you have grown. thank you for making this video, you are my "wonder" movie tonight. keep your head up and thank you
10:31 this photo made me tear up because i have a dachshund myself and she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. But i am a really shy kid in school. Im in year 8 and its the start of term 4 in two days, im trying to be more confident but i feel like its just the kids in the achool that make me more anxious because i went to primary school with them so they know im shy, i cant be myself, i cry alot and yeah. I feel as if the only thing that can fix this if i move schools. Where nobody knows me. I can be a different person, i can be myself. But theres one thing getting in the way. I still cry alot, im sensitive, i cry over little things. If someone says something abt me , it makes me really insecure again.
I have 8 social tips that helped me through middle school, and I think they can be somewhat useful to you as well. 1. Always be nice to someone when you're first interacting with them, it's fine to tease them once you develop a considerably good relationship to them, but first impressions are pretty darn important. 2. Always keep at least 3 or more close friends for you to talk to anytime in your class. 3. If there's a "popular kid" group in your class, get closer to them one by one, preferably with the most friendly one being the first person to interact with. It'll be easier to interact with the others with more of them familiar with you. 4. Keep a good distance with the troublemakers, don't get too close to them as there's a high chance they'll eventually bring you into something you don't want to do. 5. If you find someone annoying, don't let your feelings get a hold of you. Just keep your conversations between them as short as possible, and ignore them when you can. 6. Arguably the most important tip I have here. Don't talk about yourself too much during a conversation with someone, let them talk about themselves as much as they want unless they're actively asking about you. However, if they're being excessively talkative, then you can try to change the topic, or even end the conversation. 7. If you have a love interest, never, and I mean _never_ talk about it to your friends unless you're 100% sure that they'll keep it a secret. It'll be extremely embarrassing both for you and your crush if rumors about it spreads throughout your school. 8. It's fine being quiet, but don't be too gloomy. Harsh truth but people don't really want to hear about how your test was bad, or that you suck at gymnastics. Frankly, it'll just make the atmosphere dark, and will give them a bad impression of you. This might seem like a lot of things to keep in mind, but it's really not that hard. I think even the slightest bit of effort to remember these stuff could help you gain more friends and therefore more confidence.
I was the same in year 8. Once 9 came around and I went into a high school, I to realized I could finally be myself. I got many more friends and most people are not as annoying. What I am trying to say it once you get to a new school, things seem to get better. Ofc year 8 will effect it. If you cry about the littlest things, you will grow up. If someone makes fun of you for something and they are just a dick, don't listen to them because their opinion is not as important as much you think. If you get embarrassed, people will forget about it. Or if they don't, they might joke about it in a fun way. One time I fell on a treadmill and my pants fell down. I got really embarrassed about it and I got really sad. But people don't actually care. Just remember, you tend to overthink what people are talking about. I hope you get better soon 😊
Anxiety usually comes from you trying to be someone you aren’t. I went through bad anxiety when I was in my late years of school. I would act like other people to try copy their personality and I only realised later that is definitely not something you should do. I started overthinking how situations went and replayed every conversation I had and picked out the negatives and would beat myself up for it for the next few weeks. I would also plan scripts out in my head on what I should say, very pathetic I know. That is not a way to live trying to be perfect all the time because nobody is. Once you start overthinking is usually when anxiety comes in because you think that everyone is against you and laughing at dumb things you have said, but literally no one cares. Even after i realised this was a stupid thing to do, my brain would just naturally do it in conversations trying to sound perfect. My voice also got a lot quieter when I was talking after a year of doing this and I would became very awkward in conversations because I was trying to be perfect even though I knew it’s a stupid thing to do. Occasionally girls would try talk to me and I would just crumble because my brain was so focused on sounding cool and perfect resulting in me coming across very strange (they obviously didn’t speak to me again). It’s just the brain acting differently to what your mind is thinking. I was also told as well that you should be going into conversations thinking about the other person and not yourself. That way the conversation will actually feel like one and not just you trying to impress the other person I’ve been doing better recently at being less shy and awkward in situations doing simple things such as saying morning to strangers on the street and making small talk with the cashier. That stuff really does help I’m telling you. I made my brain realise that no one is thinking you’re a weirdo or strange and to grow up Basically anxiety is just your mind playing tricks on you and brainwashing you into thinking people are going to judge you all the time which is not true at all. Just be yourself and stop pretending to be perfect
My teenage years got ruined due to my upbringing. While my upbringing was good, but due to my family’s adamant way of raising me due to factors I could not control it gave me a lot of anxiety. My family raised me to be what I could best describe as a “waiter boy” always wearing polo button downs, dress pants etc. always wanted me to be respectful, always mature. And even though those are some very beneficial traits to have, to have that forced onto you since birth really set in stone my mentality. My family made my maturity skyrocket to an adult’s formality by the age of 12. It felt good, and I was doing very good in school but I felt, isolated. Since I was raised differently than most of my school peers, it was hard for me to relate with them. This made it hard to makes friends or at least dedicated close friends. Also because of this waiter boy mentality, I also developed perfectionism because my parents expected good grades, but I could not differentiate good and perfect grades, so I would often punish myself whether mentally or physically for getting a 94 on an exam etc. By the time I got to high school all of these developed to an extreme, I was afraid of dressing slightly trendy because I was afraid of being scolded by my parents, and afraid of being myself with my peers in fear of being judged. That was happening 3/4 years of highschool but by senior year it really hit me that this was my last year with all my peers ive known for 12 years. I just decided that I don’t care what people think of me and that I want to enjoy the last school year being myself. And so I did, it felt freeing, I expected backlash but I got a lot of support. It felt good. But as the year went on I noticed a lot of changes in myself, since I wasn’t constantly overthinking all the time, it felt like my mind has gone empty and my subconscious is a lot quieter. My dialect has also changed as now I don’t spend minutes thinking and forming my thoughts but instead say what I think in the moment which has gotten me in trouble a few times but it feels okay. I’ve also noticed that I have most definitely lost some iq points and at least feel a bit dumber than my younger self but as much as that hurts to take in. I’m much happier now than I was then. I went from completely self conscious, shy, and anxious to completely extroverted, talkative, and animated. I dress how I want now and just feel more myself. But even so the effects of this change still crack through the new me. I now have some form of OCD since I will have to repeat the same task or actions 4 to 7 times before continuing, it’s harder to hear my thoughts and think, I feel less academically effective, my dialect is not to my liking. I flinch a lot more since I let my guard down. And the anxiety of being alone or different or unlike others still happens, even around friends I find it hard to fit in or always feel like an outcast, it hurts, and I think about why it does a lot. And I cope very badly. I suppress my issues, and hide my feelings. Just so others dont judge me. But at least I feel free, and happy. And while I do miss a lot of the old me I do accept the new me. My biggest issue I face is having like one or two weeks every 3 months where im extremely depressed, self conscious, and anxious but within a day or two I tend to jump back to being myself. I definitely miss the old good parts of me, but im fine losing those perks in order to free the weight off my back and stress on my body. I missed having a teenager life during my teenage years due to being a waiter boy, so now going on to 20 im acting more like a teen than I ever was, and im happy to finally have that experience. Let me be a teen for once for at least bit. I acted like an mature adult from birth to 18, so let me have 2 years to act a fool teen before going back to being an mature adult for the rest of my life.
I'm 16 years old, this channel has helped me understand myself better, we have very similar stories,your videos do a lot more than you think, thank you
The worst part about being the “quiet kid” is that everyone assumes the worst and think you’re a school shooter or something terrible like that. I hated that so much
Exactly! Especially when they talk about you and they know you’re not going to do anything because, you’re the quiet kid
I never assumed the quiet kids were school shooters. I just assumed they were quiet because they were sick and tired of everyone’s BS. The racist “dark humor” jokes, the unfunny class clown “antics,” the comments that *very certain* classmates (everyone has known at least one) make that was borderline sexual harassment, and don’t forget the kid who LOULDY AND OBNOXIOUSLY MOANS IN CLASS!
Yeah, that’s exactly what I went through. I just want to have ONE normal school day, but it’s just impossible. The only reason I tolerated school was because there was a small amount of teachers and classmates who were actually worth being around.
Same
Ngl at least they’re scared of us💀
I used to be like this back in middle school, I never really talked to anybody or attended social gatherings so everybody always joked about me being a school shooter, and that felt disrespectful because what my small friend group said about me and most of the things I did around the time contradicted that, I was just annoyed that I had to wake up that morning, and I was always surrounded by people I didn't like to spend time with.
I'm a sophomore in high school now, and I'm getting advice from my girlfriend on how to be social and I'm trying my best to follow her advice, and it's actually worked. Last week, I actually made a friend on the bus because she wanted to get to know me and I accepted her offer, and it was actually really refreshing.
I've realized by like the past week or so that I actually enjoy spending time with people and having conversations, and it makes me wish that Covid never happened so I would've remained a social kid. My extroversion completely derailed and got destroyed because of Covid, and at first I thought it was great because it meant I didn't need to go to school, but I never really went outside much and I didn't really interact with my family members unless it was for something important (I still don't).
social anxiety and just anxiety as a whole is so dehumanizing. you feel like you're on stage in a full venue when you're simply just talking to a stranger, you feel stupid when you talk about your interests and hobbies, you feel ugly when you have a slight imperfection on your body and it leads to shutting people out of your life, avoiding being perceived and putting on a facade to blend into a room and avoid judgement. you feel lesser than others and to avoid this feeling of being lesser than human you don't go around others. you avoid crowds, parties and events. everything feels so difficult and eventually leads to depression. it took me 4 years to realize that i need help and another 4 years to actually act on it and i'm doing a bit better now. i still have extreme social anxiety and can't talk to strangers but improvement is always a step in the right direction, no matter how small. good luck to those battling any anxiety and/or depression. you are loved, cared for and the person who lights up the room. keep going, take breaks and reflect.
This related to me so much😅
@@jamesgardener-d2b i'm glad i could speak of this. good luck! :)
Great explanation
Grow up
@@nood1le if you're replying to me like this who's the one who needs maturing?.. 💀
Blows my mind you're only 18. I'm 22 and feels like everyone's ahead of me socially. Thankfully it's a learned skill, and I've witnessed introverted, anxious people adapt, overcome to be liked, respected, and relatable.
In the same boat as you , how do you open to overcome this?
21 here, and were not really introverted but we're either forced or manipulated like he said. People who didnt go through what we went through are out here worrying what other people think and require other people for their entire happiness and joy...
High schooler here, I definetely get what you mean. I wouldn't consider myself an introvert, just really bad at talking to people and being myself. It almost makes you feel like you're a child, too dumb or young to connect with people. I've heard that stuff like this can spring up from childhood trauma and stunting your development, so seeking help to try and come to terms with anything from your past might help. I also agree with that mindset, let's remember that we're not alone. There are people that we can relate with, and there is a way out. Stay safe yall 🙏
@@rabbittko1421”People who didn’t go through what we went through” what does that even mean
22 and never had a girlfriend buddy?
20 here. It really sucks to look back on my high school years. That were supposed to be “the best time of my life” but I was miserable. Problem is that when you’re the quiet kid people assume you’re okay with it and purposely leave you alone. They think that you’re exactly where you want to be
i’ve just entered high school and I couldn’t relate to this more, I don’t know why but I feel this sort of guilt from not being able to socialize as much as a normal teenager.
@@edieag hey man, im 20 yrs old now and I felt the same way during my high school experience... it CAN get better, only if you want it to. Remember that you can control the way you think and that is all you need really. Just remember that you're not alone!
@@edieag dude I feel the exact same. I feel like there’s something wrong with me that I can’t make friends or just come across as a normal person lmao
Well it's a fresh start so hopefully you guys can make new friends
perfectly said
I was the “ shy girl “ in my class in primary school I used to overthink about little things and always feel like I’m making a fool of myself and I’m ugly and all that stuff. My old friends really got to me about my acne so I stole my mums makeup but I wasn’t a make up artist at 11 so I went to school then embarrassed myself more..I always feel like people think about me in a bad way and I still overthink at night I used to cry myself to sleep. The quote of the day “ you know my name not my story “ bye guys!! ❤❤
I'm currently going through a similar situation where I can't look anybody in the eye without being accused of something or yelled at. Good times.
Oh..
Aw are you ok now?
I felt different from others because my friends didn’t wear makeup but I felt compelled to wear makeup in year 11 because I was tired of people picking on me in school but either way I didn’t know how to use it either and made a fool out of myself actually too.
I’ve learnt im mad im not learning as quicker as all the other girls doing makeup then again, I have to remember I only started doing it like 4 months ago but I’m always self critical and hard on myself despite learning as much skills as I’ve tried to learn from my age. I’m trying and that’s atleast what matters and others just haven’t grown up to wear makeup but I have to remember. We all grow up differently and it’s ok to outgrow even from your friends, because you’ve learnt somethings and grown up more than they have.
And I learnt this from watching sis vs bro and karina outgrowing Ronald even though karina was cutting her hair and trying something new because she felt a lot of pressure from everyone bullying her on RUclips she moved on from sis vs bro and I want that too. If I wear makeup at a young age that’s a sign of growing and maturing but don’t feel scared to do that unlike me.
@@angelar9759 Guys can handle cold water and not scorching hot. Well I cant. Women like hot water and hate cold. Just dont let products influence ur entire life or beauty yourself , be it more natural products or worser ones
I'm learning to look at people eyes and keeping helping myself. Nice to see people with the same problems. We can do this. 🤝💪@@ArmyofRats
Brother I am 17 right now, for the last month I was drowning in nostalgia and I was worried about my future and was really depressed. Then I found your channel , it is really helpful. Thanks Brother
i turn 18 in nov
Hey mate congrats on graduating feeling the exact same. Well actually I don't know what I am supposed to feel bro
I was and still am tied to nostalgia and I cant really tell if its a bad thing or a good thing.
@@yourblack2798having nostalgia is good but being obsessed with it and not letting it go is SERIOUSLY bad, sure it feels amazing but the distractions it does prevents all sorts of developments
Reminder: GOD LOVES YOU AND YOU MATTER #GODLOVE ALL GLORY AND PRAISE TO HIM AMEN AND HALLELUJAH 🔥🙏✝️❤️🔥
I have social anxiety, I overthink everything and I’m really shy. I wish I had someone to talk to. Thank you for making me feel like I’m not alone
Womp womp
@@iroapeentertainment5010keep playing with ur toys little bro
You will get it sooner or later like me when im was 10 grade high school im met people who can make me talk to them
@@iroapeentertainment5010 happy 5th birthday
@@iroapeentertainment5010 someone's jealous their not in a normal bus
I am the quiet kid too, but I am trying to become more communicative since I got into a new high school. It's been really difficult to get over myself but I believe I can do it!
Thank you for helping us as a generation, you're changing lives❤
You have belief, which 90% of people lack, which means you have more potential than the majority of people, keep going ❤️
I'm a quiet kid too, and I don't like fitting into the new gen alpha stuff. I know you can do it, stay strong! Everything is going to work out 💪❤
@@Jak0bTheRobloxGamer You too bro, stay hard!
Wish I could "get over" my social anxiety before I left school. I just left, turning 17 in December and now I'm worried about what I'm gonna do since I missed most of secondary school and all together, only went for like.. not even 100 days, all throughout those 5 years. Can't go to university, get a job, nothing. Wish I was still in school so I could try to become more communicative too and actually possibly have something to do with my life (weird a 16yr old saying that, but yk lol). Sorry for yapping
Same
27 year-old Finnish man here with diagnosed Autism, ADHD, language developmental disorder, anxiety disorder, OCD and PTSD. This video resonates me deeply. Because of my autism and that I learned to speak not until 3 years old, from kindergarden up until 9th year I was almost constantly bullied and ostracised. Because of that, not only did I became a vary withdrawn and chronically lonely person, I lost all those years in social and mental developmental development. It wasn't until I realized I had a pornography addiction that I realized I needed to do something about it: better myself and reach out for help. Even after one year of finally finding my peers and starting to learn social skills, and gradually gaining confidence around people, I still feel developmentally behind my peers, which sometimes has felt hard. Nevertheless, I am glad that I found a fellow sufferer who I can relate to, and share my similar experiences with him and others. I hope this helps.
I don't feel alone, it always feels like you are behind the 8 ball socially and even learning how to feel and be present. I love that you have gradually found your way💜
Damn man, u rly had a lot going on in ur past and dealing with it in the present. U got this tho man
i'm very proud of you for not giving up because of your mental health
College female here. I relate to this video so much. I am nurodivergent and in elementary school and middle school I had the WORST anxiety. For the life of me I could not be myself. Didn't help that all my "friends" were more like frenemies. You know the type. "Oh I just loveee that handmade sweater your aunt made you! The pocket is... cute." *In private* "Ew she really wore that?" Yeah.... But I finally told may parents about my anxiety and take meds for it now and a dear older friend of mine said I tried to fit in and never could so I finally gave up trying. I think about those words often and it helps. To the 10 year old girl who would walk into school every day sick to her stomach, to a college adult who isn't afraid to wear whatever she wants to her in person classes and speak up? You matter and you did that. Change is possible
thank for sharing your story ! i relate to it so much in my life also! what college do you goto?
@@PrimoProductions Well I don't usually share that information lol but it's a college in Oregon In the Pacific Northwest (: glad you can relate. Or should I say sucks you can relate 🤣
Does anxiety count as neurodivergence
I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I can see how tough you are from all the things you’ve said. I struggled an emmense pressure of ocd just because of what people say about me; and I hid to the point people noticed and I get even more anxious. You’re so strong for this, and we are here for you, you are loved ❤️❤️
@@angelar9759 Thank you for all you said and I;m sorry you also dealt with your own share of anxiety. I don't think being euro divergent costs as anxiety, that's two separate disorders, but it might make the anxiety stronger?
I didn't have any friends for most of my teenage years and after finishing school I regret not talking to anybody
That's not always a bad thing, most of my friends I don't see anymore because they are busy with their own lives and having friends can bring a lot of unnecessary drama
@@BRITdave-so1sl many humans need a social life to not fall into depression. for me sometimes i get depressive periods where i skip schools alot and i feel even worse cause i am not social, but at the same time it makes me feel like i cant be social when in fact i can but taking the step to start going to school again feels hard
also like i said some not everyone some people are completly fine without it
yup
It's a shame I went to so many different schools and didn't meet a single person worth even talking to 😂
Hey, this was really inspiring. I'm 15, and after moving schools for better education, I’ve only made four real friends. I often stutter when I speak and have trouble keeping conversations going, which makes me quieter and more anxious in social situations. I find it hard to start conversations, and when I do, I usually stutter or my face gets red. I try my best to engage with others, but it’s physically challenging. Watching this video has motivated me to change my mindset and work on overcoming my social awkwardness.
I’m 15 as well and this is exactly what happens to me too
Don't think youll see this, but I'm a 14 year old kid, i've always been homeschooled, and I have ZERO irl friends since 2020. None. And when I go to places like the grocery store i get unbelievably paranoid and don't like being around people anymore. I don't know how to get out of this state and I feel hopeless. Especially because I don't go to school and i never have the oppurtunity to meet kids my age. :( (edit: another thing is that i was raised VERY sheltered, and some kids my age are doing stuff that i am afraid of because i never met people like them, part of the reason why i dont meet people. Also my parents are not willing to stop homeschooling me.)
But how exact thought my also be can't fit in crowd I think it's because of loneliness
Also homeschooled girl here with zero friends in real life. I feel you so much! I never hang out with kids my age and feel like a social outcast
Idk if this is that easy. But u guys then should try a year of public school, if you don’t like it then go back to homeschooling
@@PxpsicleYT Either quit homeschooling or try to do hobbys and start engaging in the community. Force yourself into meeting new people
read a book u like no picture nothing and trust me ull find home there. u dont need friends unless they are to help u improve or are willing to in long term. u need knowledge and skills and friends come with that. go to the library, sports clubs, gym. that is were u wanna find real friends, there will be many that will lead you to the wrong path but you will have to find the correct ones. like i said find friends that help u improve not those who entertain u, then u will find entertainment in improvement.
i ended up dropping out of physical high school cause of anxiety. too anyone reading please listen. Stop overthinking social situations because you will realize that people actually want to talk to you.
when people talk to me, they just troll me which just gives me more anxiety..
Middle school was hell because how i isolated from everyone ended up super lonely now im 20 and i regret not trying to break out of that shell way back then, I hope anyone isolated and lonely dealing with anxiety can build that confidence up slowly and use that shit because it’s like a superpower once you get it. Everyone has it you just have to build it.
I was the quiet kid at one point but that was years ago. I do feel bad for some of the quiet kids at my high school who were like you, Jak. I've befriended them, and I'm really one of the only ppl they talk to. I hope any quiet kids out there find balance in their lives, and may God bless you
I think you’re doing great man. Always remember “ a negative mind will never give you a positive life”
100% brother, thank you for the reminder 🫶
really feel like crying rn, this video hit home HARD
i dont normally comment, but i had to... your video made me aware of my addictions an made me actually realise if I want a better life, i'll need to get rid of them
thank you man, God bless
Much love, you are never alone, and never will be, keep your head up ❤️
Hey man! 17 year old highschool senior here. I've always been the quiet kid, it's messed with my thoughts (making me feel really insecure) and what I've wanted to accomplish at school (making friends, getting to know teachers, talking to that girl :)). Recently I've been working more on myself, trying to speak up more, and I am happy I'm makin progress but it's kinda been all over the place. Finding your channel has really made me feel not so alone going through all the hell I've been feeling over the years. Wanna thank you for all you're doing.
PS: not an avid commenter but man this video made me more conscious of how to approach my life. love your vids brotha.
I always been the loud and class clown until year 8
Im 17 too, this resonates with me too
I'm in 8th grade and going through the same things you are saying in your story. I put a mask over myself in the day and feel disappointed and I feel like I don't fit in. ever since I started to watch your videos, I've been doing better. I've been way more confident in conversations and just around people in general. I can finally be myself. Your videos are making my school years way better than what it was.
Also, I saw that you said on one of the comments that you feel like these videos are a waste of time, but you shouldn't think that. Your videos help more people than you can imagine. Keep doing what you love.
Stay strong man! And I'm also a very shy person irl sometimes and like to be alone. You're not alone man. I hope you have an awesome day
@@Jak0bTheRobloxGamer thx man
You have to change now. Take it from me, im 17. I have always been the quiet kid and because of it now i dont have a social life, its now or never for you to make sure you dont end up like me brother.
@@reubenwest9474 I feel so bad for you man. You don't deserver that at all. I hope you're able to make friends soon. Sending all my love and prayers 🙏❤
I’m 17 too! I’ve also had to transform my life into bring more social but it wasn’t easy. Glad you also made it with hard work. Well done
2020 ruined it for me personally, was way social but still had some shyness before and after 2020 i completely went into what it felt like a shell i can't leave. even going out for simple things like a quick shop i get horribly anxious and it js doesnt stop
As a 14 year old with social anxiety, I have always been anxious around people at school and literally anywhere else in public. I don't know where it came from but I know it might have been covid or the fact that I had to transfer schools and I haven't been the same I just hope it gets better through time and I am also trying to become closer to Christ, so this video really made me finally relate to something so thanks for sharing your story and I hope anyone else that is going through the same thing to get better overtime.
I was there and I can tell you. It only gets better, even if it hurts and doesn't feel like it at the time. It only gets better. Treat is as your mistakes and experiences build personality and form who you are. It's what makes us, us. Just set a good, clean mindset, ingrain good habits, and just take everyday as it comes and somethings aren't that deep.
You become stronger, wiser and more understanding this way.
Trust the process and trust every day.
Thank you for your words, feels good to know I’m not the only one as well, so your comment means more than you think. I’m glad you’re enjoying these story vids because sometimes I just feel like they’re a waste of time 😂
@@JakPiggott hell nah, keep bringin' them!
@JakPiggott Dude, always! I really enjoy these and I really like what bring out in them and they way in which you do it. Just keep it up and enjoy the process. Cheers bro!
@@JakPiggott nothing is a waste of time if you enjoy doing it. keep doing what you love :)
I’m in high school and I’ve always had anxiety (for many family related reasons). My face also turns red but my main problem is that I have trouble speaking. Either I stutter or I physically just can’t get any words out. Currently, I don’t have any close friends. I have people that I eat with at lunch but they don’t speak to me. It feels like anxiety has taken control of everything in my life. At some point I just tried not trying to make friends because it was stressing me out too much but that just led to depression. I would say my anxiety has gotten worse over time. Seeing your videos has been really inspiring to me even during tough times. Please keep making videos. Thank you Jak.
14 year old here, I can relate to this so much its crazy. I would always keep my head down, red face, scared to speak and a lot of anxiety. All of elementary school I was like this... I had 2 therapist and still felt super anxious. I would go to school crying some morning my anxiety was so bad. Now I'm in Sec 3 and connected with God over the summer. My anxiety and fear has been getting better but it never fully disappears. Thank you for sharing your story so I know I wasn't the only one!
Hey since I'm older than you I just wanted to tell you you're really young still at the beginning of your life and anxiety is really common at this age for whatever reason. Everyone has passed through it even if they don't show it or remember but it will go away completely no matter how long it takes so be happy and enjoy every moment and know that it will always get better :)❤
Hey Jak, just wanted to say that as a 16 year old struggling with moving from Melbourne to a completely new area, that your videos have been a lifesaver for me. You've shown me ways to improve my mindset like I had never thought of before, and I just wanted to say thank you, never stop doing what you're doing, because this advice is pure gold that I wish so many other people like me could discover
Wonder is an amazing movie. I read the book when I was younger and I loved it. Made me appreciate the littlest things in my life.
*"As long as your actions reflect the character you wish to have, there's no reason why everything won't work out"* I love that
Haha yeah we read the book and we’re rewarded with the movie at the end of the year 😂
@@JakPiggott you weren't really introverted since you had friends and played 1 one 1 basketball
@@MovieSummary1st
Introverted means you simply prefer alone time.
i loved this movie too!!
But part of the character is confidence and i don’t have any and I’m too nervous to do anything so I don’t know how to have my actions reflect that
You never fail to teach me something Jak
Aye much love man but take everything I say with a grain of salt ❤️
I started suddenly crying and having some kind of panic attack after watching this video, this hit me really hard because ive been living with my anxiety and depression for so long that ive just accepted it. Its the first time in like forever that ive felt atleast a bit of hope and motivation to get better, and that just overwhelmed my emotions. Thank you so much for this video and god bless you. you seem like a great guy
Thank you this has helped tremendously, for me with healing abandonment issues and self abandonment, I have been there and still experiencing it, but the more you learn to work on you and to pace yourself by learning how to rest by meditating, and self reflecting you will meet yourself in ways to which you will no like and to which ways that you will in regards to your strengths and weaknesses.
Bro just described my life. I’m in high school rn and my face does the same thing, small school but still people don’t know me. I get like panic attacks from being nervous talking to people. “Did I say something wrong? They think I’m weird”
just letting you know as someone who is around the age you went through this , you reached the right audience and this has informed me so much and helps alot. You have made a difference thanks man
5:46 we did the same thing that year in year 6 when it came out, btw Jak congrats on graduating year 12 mate. Feeling free
Yeah bro hope you transition well
Same!! One of the most vivid memories of mine. That movie had so much in it, it was the first time that, as a child, I was seeing meaning in a movie. Definitely a turning point
Haha yeah I think the majority of primary schools did, much love bro thank you ❤️
I get very happy seeing people my age with such depth, very rare in this world nowadays...you seem like an interesting person
I’m amazed he can sit down in front of a camera like this and tell his story for 15 minutes. I would be an emotional wreck lol.
Moving countries and going from an extremely extrovert, outgoing kid to a shy introvert kid really broke me as well. The feeling of not being able to communicate and express myself properly really broke my self confidence level. This channel and this comment section really make me feel safe and makes me realize that im not the only one going through hard times. I really needed this video. Thank you for sharing your experience❤️
Introverts aren’t always shy and introvert isn’t a good or bad thing. Stop with the stupid stereotypes you retard. Maybe you stupid extroverts are just annoying and the “quiet kid” doesn’t want to deal with you.
Thanks so much for sharing your experience, I could really relate to this a year back.
When I was starting out middle school I completely went from extrovert to the shyest and quietest person in the sixth grade.
I kept my head down and wore a mask all the time, and many times during class and mainly everywhere I would zone out from not talking for so long during the day. I had no friends, and the only place I seemed normal was around family
It was horrible, and I'm glad this video could make me relate to it so much.
At least now I have been able grow out of this anxiety stage, and I hope anyone else who has problems similar to this will grow out of them too.
Hey jak, I’ve been watching since your first anxiety video, you help me a lot with what I labeled as my anxiety, I’m 19 and finally I’ve been breaking out of my shell, but you also saved me from a darker place than anxiety, which is rather not go into detail, but I’d always watch your shorts, all the way to the end, and feel so much calmer. Love you brother, and I hope you have a great day.
im not jak but i hope you have a great day too
Are we normalising jak now
@@angelar9759 wdym
I can relate to this Jak. I used to get bullied when I was younger for being myself, but I've realized all people can be Is theirself. It made me anxious, and I avoided anyone, even my own family. I would isolate all day and doom scroll on tiktok. But I've realized the darkest nights have the brighest stars. Hope this helps, brother. Keep inspiring many generations to come 🙏
This video made me realize we have a lot in common. The anxiety I felt during my teenage years has taught me a lot of lessons. Now that I'm in my first year of college, I intend to apply those lessons.
Thank you Jak for making this video and sharing your story. It really reasonated with me
I was the quiet kid my whole life, now I'm 32 and it's basically ruined my whole life. Then i got cancer and it got even worse. I have never had any type of relationship. I found out about the blackpill recently and despite how evil its depicted as online, basically i can tell you from experience that everything those people come up with is 100% true. If you're in this situation it was over from the beginning, people want to gaslight you into believing that it's your own fault and you've somehow had total control over how your life plays out, but when these experiences go back to your earliest memories at around age 3 or 4, how can you expect a child that age to respond in a healthy way to a world that seems to hate him? If this is all my fault, then i was born this way. I've seen plenty of shy kids in my time but they always turn out fine in the end.
I have no real friends, i get the feeling most people have been my friend out of pity because they've always seemed like they would want to hide me from "the cool kids", I'm someone that the cool kid would look at once and say "who the fk is this guy", then my only choice is to hang my head and walk away. I've been marked.
I've tried every type of self improvement you could imagine, it always backfires and things end up getting worse. Even medications have a paradoxical effect on me. The worst insomnia I've ever had in my life was when i was put on sleeping pills for example.
It can't even be over if it never fking began
Ive just turned 16 two days ago, and I have come here to say that this is exactly what I have been dealing with throughout secondary school since year 7. And when I mean exactly, no joke. I had the problem with the red face. My anxiety was so bad. My friends just manipulated me, made me feel so shit. I tried to repress my anxiety, not going out, that gave me social anxiety, depression and I nearly took my life. I felt so hopeless. I say nearly but I probably wasnt gonna do it although I had it set up, and did some ‘practice tries’ to see what it would feel like. If you are reading this, if you have anxiety. Do not repress it. Meaning don’t stop doings you love because of anxiety. Something I struggled with was hygiene, my family did not properly introduce me to this and I lacked the social norms of it, people at school found out I dont shower, was labelled as the smelly stupid kid. I stuck to this label, and accepted it myself , and thought I couldnt do nothing about it , but I can. People even calling me a social experiment because I didn’t know how to defend myself and my feelings, because my family didnt socialise me into doing so and I found it so awkward to do it, and it just felt weird for me.
From Year 7 through year 10 , I felt so hopeless, so alone, but that was because I was doing this to myself. Social media too was influencing me on this. I started watching depressed tiktoks, which made me feel even more shit about myself nonetheless people at school as well. Social media introduced me to self harm at age 13. I continued this self harm up until year 9. Then I stopped permenantly. Without social media I would not have done this, as I didn’t know what it even was at the time. And social media really grabbed me and threw me under the water drowning me, those depressing tiktoks making me believe I was hopeless. However you are never hopeless. When you are listening or reading through people’s success stories through TedTalk or some other video, you might think that this will never be you, as you are not the person speaking on the stage. I thought that too. I am not speaking on a stage, but I can tell you for a fact that I do not want to kill myself anymore.
When I had a really shit day, after school, I would just leave as fast as I can go into the woods. Find a private spot. And just reflect. Looked at nature and just sat there thinking about the day. Did this on multiple occasions. I had no idea what was wrong with me. Why were people so mean?
Here is how I fixed it.
First of all. Sleep. Sleep is the key. I experienced ‘brain fog’ everyday, I couldnt think properly, I wasnt myself, I was 50% of myself, thinking through mud. It would take so much power to speak. You kind of feel hungover( I dont know what that feels like but its how I would describe it) when people said something disrespectful to me, I had brain fog and didn’t know how to think, so I just go along with them and laugh about them disrespecting me, they would then continue this everyday, made me feel more shit, but they acknowledged the fact that i did not respect myself which made me very vulnerable.This was when I had no respect for myself at all. I didn’t realise how much people were walking over me and I thought it was normal, no, it wasn’t.
2 self respect. Respect yourself. You are a human being. You cannot be treated like a literal wastebin, thats what I was treated like. Do things for yourself. This really helps. When I bed rot all day because I dont have many true friends, don’t know if I even have one yet still working on it. Treat yourself. For example on the weekend I was bed rotting, so I went cycling to the woods near the motorway, I went along this park with zip lines, in some dark forest , saw a long dirt path , followed it to the end and to my surprise, I found an abandoned private mountain bike trail. This for me was a very proud moment, and to this day I am gonna clear it out and make it even better, my own little treat long term project, which I enjoyed doing by myself. Eventually my anxiety began to slowly vanish when I had self respect, and I didn’t view myself as below anyone. We are all equal and the same. I still have anxiety, but I am more like myself, and not pretending to be someone else.
3. Hygiene.
Shower, brush your teeth even if you dont feel like it. You will feel better and more energetic to do the next big task of the day. If you are depressed and don’t bother on self care and have long hair which is never cut and have self esteem. Go for a haircut. I used to look awful. Really awful. Never got
A haircut. My hair was like a birds nest, didn’t know how to take care of it as at age 14 I didn’t even know what conditioner was as I wasn’t taught this. So I learnt it myself. My parents didnt teach me this because they taught I was expected to know it. I didn’t though. My looks really impacted
my self esteem, probably one of the main reasons why I wanted to die. But when I eventually learnt all these hygiene techniques, I eventually got to how I wanted to be looked at in society.
People started to respect me more, even I started respecting myself. People finally perceived me for being myself, not some smelly introvert who has a birds nest. Don’t think, when will this nightmare end. Think, what do I have to do to get out of this cycle? Once you get out of the cycle, you will never want to go back.
Last thing, here is a quote which helped me change, because I was too scared to be myself. “You are under no obligation to be the person you were 5 minutes ago”
Labelling is when people label you in a certain way , when it is said on multiple occasions it sometimes makes the individual start to believe this. Sometimes they realise they are being labelled and change, sometimes they believe they are stuck. You are not stuck my friend. You can escape. Good luck.
happy late birthday
it’s 4 am, i’ve been struggling so hard lately and this made me feel so much better, i genuinely have not felt so relieved and seen right now. ❤ Thank you for this
I think they were replying to Robert, but that was a very kind comment @@jas-mw3fm
@@Hiiiiiiiiiiilol oh haha i thought it was the same person who made the original comment thank you (:
Thank you so much for this comment man
Hi Jak, i've had a similar teenage experience in terms of anxiety and getting countless red faces in school. All i have to say is that anxiety will never disappear (or at least that's my current belief), as it is an emotion. Some deeply emotional humans like you and others watching this video (including myself) will probably always experience every emotion at its max, whether it be happiness or anxiety. Personally, my biggest goal this year is to try and train myself to be as authentic and as myself as possible in any situation, particularly in school and when meeting new people, as i've always struggled with this for most of my life (i've always been known as the shy and quiet one). Hopefully i'll soon find out if it possible to train authenticity across all social situations. Thanks for yet again another deeply relatable video Jak, and remember it's life to experience all these things so we can learn from them.
Hey bro, I'm 15 and it's been a year since I discovered your channel, I used to get super anxious and I was a pretty skinny kid. Then I discovered your channel, you helped me just a little back then but last month I was starting high school, and you were the first person that came to mind, so I watched one of your videos and it stuck with me for the whole day, it gave me the confidence I needed so thank you for the help you gave us all!
That's good that things have started to improve! The think is adversity and difficult times can help people stronger, better in the future... so I say use the difficult experiences in your past to be stronger, better person in the future!
On a different, the videos on the playlist on my channel titled 'Purpose of Life?' might change someone's life for the better!
social anxiety has damaged me ways i can’t even explain i just wanted to be able to fit in and make friends etc..
Thank you for sharing your story! I can relate to you alot, as a wasian australian i struggled with alot of anxiety and loneliness, the internet helped by also hurt me more. I'm older now and have more control of what i let into my head and its good to know that I'm not alone in my experience. It's great to see your online success too.
Thank you for speaking about this! I struggled with social anxiety and i was always the quiet kid in class too, other kids and teacher's will make me feel like there was something really wrong with me for it which lead to me becoming insecure about being quiet and embarrassed, i will try so hard to talk and interact but it was always so exhausting for me and it'll just make my anxiety worse, throughout my entire school life people would make me feel like i have to talk and I'm weird if i don't they'll says things like "you have to get out of your shell" "get out of your comfort zone" or "oh don't worry you'll grow out of it" this just made me more anxious, it wasn't until after hs I found out I have selected mutism, when I found this out I felt a little better, and i realized that It's okay to be a quiet person yk? All this time i was putting so much pressure on myself to change into this extroverted person and waiting for myself to grow out of being quiet, Im 21 now and i finally accepted that I'll never grow out of this because this is just who i am, forcing myself to talk would be like if a extroverted person forced themselves not to talk. And ever since i accepted myself for who i am, my anxiety has gotten alot better 😌
As someone who can relate to you I just wanna say I'm so proud of you bro. You're really brave person the same happened to me when i was 10 years old i got bullied for 4 years i wasn't shy kid at all but when i get bullied i just couldn't understand what was happening i was always saying to my mum why it was me who always massed up with everything than i started hating myself whenever something happen i feel like it was me who caused this i was feeling isolated i didn't know what to do that all triggered me. Day by day I'm feeling drowned I'm 16 yr old now thanks to u your video helped me.
And the main point was it was my friends who was like secretly bullying me that time i feels like i was the stupid person to be friends with those.
This video made me realize so much about myself and has helped me immensely in such a short span of time already after I watched it last night
RUclips notifications are TOO personalized 😭
I swear, it's like someone's watching me.
Someone deleted my comment, I feel like someone is watching me too xD
@@turtle-ot2qcur comment is back I think
agreed 💀😭
😂😂
TY for this!!! We needed 🙏🏿 to hear this. It has helped our Family so much 💙💙
4:45 - So true, man. This happened to me right before and during covid, then it just continued. Plus, I had worse acne than everyone else my age, so it shut me down. I always felt like I was the only one who experienced this because I didn't see others struggling with shyness or social anxiety. I'm still trying to fix years of damage, but honestly, not much helps.
Me too! I feel you... With corona when i was 14 and now im 19 and still struggling sm with the anxietys and thoughts..ny brain is just used to shutting down and to be anxious. I cant get out of it. Its a cycle it just repeats !
I definitely relate to what you said in the video, Jak. I've always been the "quiet" kid and a more introverted individual. Even at 17 years old, I often find myself anxious around people. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who is the "quiet kid". I always appreciate watching your videos man. 🙏❤🔥💪
Being the nice kid that I was, all it took was one kid to really change the course of how my childhood would be. Later I would become shy, and people heavily took advantage of me and I rarely stood up for my self in fear of getting hurt or getting in trouble. Even though I didn’t have to much trouble making friends in middle/high school, I had a hard time dealing with the constant harassment not knowing how to talk back or not knowing how to deal with them. At 19 years old, I’m currently in college, it’s been a bit difficult. And seeing these videos have helped me feel better knowing that I’m not the only person feeling this way. Ur a real one.
That's crazy, I'm 17 now so not much younger than you. This struck something in me, I've always struggled with my face going red. I've seen your videos for quite awhile now and you've helped me to focus on myself. I related to that movie, Wonder; as a kid. I'm not the prettiest and am overweight so I've made sure to keep out the way of others. Isolating myself, but this, your story hits so close to home. Thank you for sharing this ❤
Weirdo
Jak, just wanted to say thank you bro. Im 21 years old. This video was me when i was in highschool. Acne decided to affect me so bad that I never looked at anyone in the face and was scared to talk to people because they were gonna see my acne, I told my grandma I wanted medication for it.. That made things actually much worse that everyone around me thought something was wrong with me. You dont understand how happy wearing a mask during covid made me while others hated the mask. I felt confident and talked more with everyone....Just for that short while at least.. Your redness was my acne. Those days affect me on how i am today just talking to people. Now im in real estate trying to talk to everyone and I just wanted to say you might be a little younger than me but man do i look up to you as motivation. You talk with so much core values and i thank you bro.
I'm 26, and I have struggled so much with anxiety throughout school. It's become recently harder for me because I need to go find new friends, but I have social anxiety and If I don't know someone there, then I just close off. Watching this video and seeing that I'm not alone, that someone can relate and understand how that feels is really helpful.
I started a new school this year and I haven't made any friends since the beginning of the year. I was always shy, but there were people who took an interest in me at my old school. Now I'm the quiet kid who sits in the last desk in the corner of the room, has no friends and who "would probably start a massacre" according to my classmates. I see the other students hanging out together and having fun and just I can wish I was there with them. Even though I've been called stupid, weird and other things by them, deep down I still have this desire to be part of a group. I feel helpless.
Me too brother
I been in my school for the 3rd year now, I still barely talk with anyone, same problem here, I just don't see anyone having any interest in me, and Im always left out. Stuff is so tough I barely can handle it atp
@@dargaiandras328 Rs just discribed my life
Feeling the same way, I realized today that I need to take that empty pit and the desire to fill it and use that motivation to create a better version of myself; grow in my faith; work out and sculpt my body. I urge you to do the same. My prayers go out to you brother 🙏
that was me in school. i would go the whole school day not having talked to anyone. Maybe you could try looking for someone who is also shy or on their own and talk to them. I did that on the last day of school and we ended up becoming friends. I just regret that I didn't do that sooner, we could have been friends for years if I had had the courage.
You probably don't remember me, you get hundreds of comments a day. I just want you to know you really helped me and so many more people. I hope there are gonna be more people like you, genuine people...
I think I do remember you bro, I remember replying to one or two of your comments one time (I think)
@@JakPiggott yes, that's me.
Beeing able to remember comments is crazy
Zak, chill out my guy
@@Zakington-c5r it is this was months ago
I’m 15 and I’ve been the quiet kid my whole life, and I haven’t had a friend in 4 years, shits rough ✊
same bro
It will get better. Don’t worry. But you can also expect things to fall into your lap. Try to socialize a little bit more
Fatharless behavior tbh
@@iroapeentertainment5010 heres a mirror 🤡
Bro is 15 🤣 my whole life 😂
I’m in middle school, which is 6 grade and I’m glad I took the time to watch this. I can relate so much, I have social anxiety, and type one diabetes. So I can relate so much, every time I would go present my work to the class, standing in front of the class, my hands would go numb, and my blood pressure would just go down , and I started feeling fatigue. I would avoid my symptoms, and try to keep going with my speeches. I had this one friend, named Valentina, she was so nice but when it came to recess, she would try to find other friends to hang out with instead of me, and I was never really the first choice of anybody. I was always the “ last pick “. Valentina would only talk to me, and she wouldn’t do anything else accept talk. She wouldn’t invite me into her team, and with her other friends, she would just laugh at me, and yes this happened 3 months ago, I’m still getting over it. I tried to tell my mom but, I couldn’t I couldn’t bare the fact of losing a friend. She was the only friend I had, and she would joke around and call me lesbian with another girl in my class who kind of talked to me a few times. Then I lost a friend, when I finally told my mom, she went to the school, and my mom and Valentina’s mom were fighting, and I was just the worst of the worst. I felt like absolute failure and garbage. The next day, I didn’t see Valentina in school, but her friends went back to normal, and we’re glad she wasn’t there, they never apologized though. And after that day, I became affected with Social anxiety, and the story above of me presenting my work to the class, was during the social anxiety.
These videos are always so interesting and helpful :)
@@Mikah_again nahh he still didn’t reply thats such a disappointing thing
@@EsayaurSsyaur he will, give him a day. Then he starts replying to coments
@@EsayaurSsyaurI think he will later. it’s only 6 hours ago. If he would see this he would probably be so happy
You’re a legend man, you didn’t need to do that but I appreciate your support ❤️
@@EsayaurSsyaurpatience brother 🤞❤️
Damn, when i started high school as a junior, things were going good so far. There were two girls and the teacher said that everyone has to present for what we discuss. One of them said if i want to write and i politely said 'no'. I thought that she was going to write this time but she takes it too personal. A few days later, the girls were talking aLOT of shit about me being quiet now. I try to hold my tears but it hurts me too much. Never in my life have i been so humiliated like that. and today, another different girl was making fun of me for being quiet. I did nothing wrong but just be quiet and get the work done
Thank you brother for your Testimony. And you were not yapping at all my dear friend. You were sharing something personal and poured your heart out into this video. Dispite the foul language. And i'm so glad and happy for you that things have gotten a lot better for you over time. Jesus is good. And he loves you greatly ❤ You got this brother. 😊 Never give up.
I also had social anxiety during middle school and high school. It indeed fucked up my youth. I was part of a friend group, but even to them I barely talked. Once I opened up about this struggle with someone from my friend group, I slowly started to be able to be myself around other people. I chose this friend becausr she talked about having a friend with social anxiety, which really helped cuz it would mean she woudnt think I was weird for having it. Fast forward, now I'm in uni and I'm able to make friends 😄😄.
I’ve had my entire life and before I got diagnosed I had a full on panic attack every morning before school
Thanks for the video man. Sometimes I have weeks or even months where I don’t reflect and it does make my anxiety worse. I needed this because it helped remind me that I’m a strong person and I am capable. Thanks bro 💪🏾
God I relate so much to what you’ve shared in this video…
I’m 18 at the moment and I’m starting to realise that the anxiety I experience everyday isn’t really normal. I’ve always been quite shy, not wanting to draw too much attention to myself. But my face turns red after any minor inconvenience, and EVERYBODY always feels the need to point this out as if I’m not aware of it myself. And I don’t simply blush - I get bloody red: when I’m doing a presentation in college, when a professor asks me a question and I have to answer in front of my classmates, or even when my family or friends lightheartedly joke about me.
I don’t know how, but it got to a point where I didn’t want to show up at uni at all. I don’t really get bullied, but I also can’t form any genuine friendships, mainly due to my extreme shyness.
These days I try to fake my personality and act more outgoing than I actually am in order to have some kind of human interaction, but my red face and extreme awkwardness eventually slip through. I have 2 more years to go through at university and I don’t know how I’ll make it when I always dine alone, go home alone, study alone, do presentations alone.
I’m really open to finding friends but I simply can’t. My shyness kills me. Does anyone have any tips for me?
P.S.: sorry if this was worded poorly. English isn’t my first language and I can sometimes lose track of thought when I speak it.
Everything you mentioned happened to me, Indonesian class we had to come up with a sentence and in Year 6 we watched wonder. Also i always get that red face and everyone saw.
Additionally, I had problems in conversations every time i screwed up in a conversation I just thought about it every single week and it went on for a few months to even a year.
I later got diagnosed with OCD and anxiety. Thanks for this video Jak, you are inspiring lots of young people. (P.s i hope you don’t mind me venting!)
Bro the red face thing held me back so much in life. After already having my self image fucked up by an alcoholic father, in high school the bullying started as well. The bright red face like a beetroot would always happen and I would be bullied mercilessly by almost every kid in school. The teachers just looked down on me with a mix of pity and disgust. It made me fucking hate my body, hate myself, hate everyone else.
Its been a real long journey and it still happens occasionally, i still deal with the fallout, with being too inhibited and shy, nearly 20 years later. I've questioned if I did some messed up stuff in a past life to deserve it.
Anyway theres always hope for growth and healing. Thanks for sharing your story
You did nothing messed up, the people around you are the ones who are truly messed up. From what you wrote in the comments you seem like a great guy and I hope I can meet someone like you in the future
Thank you for sharing. I could relate to this a lot. My anxiety really started to become a problem in high school, and my face turning red was a huge part of it. It doesn’t seem like people mention this very much, I always thought it was just because it happened to me worse than everyone else. Every social situation, I had to be careful what I said in case my face turned red. It was my biggest fear and really limited how much I could express myself. I’m in university now and am definitely doing better; still anxious but caring less. My face still gets really red sometimes and it makes me not want to do sports, go to the gym, or be active around people. I plan my day around it so I won’t overwhelm myself and panic in places like class or meal hall where there’s nowhere to retreat. Anyways, thanks for sharing. Nice to know we’re not the only ones who feel this way:)
Also, I see many people here talking about their adhd and asd, which most likely played a role in my experience as well, and why my fear of being disliked left me curled up into myself or acting like something I wasn’t. Also things started to get much better when I got diagnosed and able to accommodate myself.
I can relate to you to. It really makes me happy to see such a young person like you, which is so close in age to myself, to have overcome (mostly) their anxiety. Thank you so much for your content. I can assure you it makes a lot of lifes better, my own one included. Have a nice day bro.
Thank you for sharing this man
Thanks so much for posting this. I’m 19 years old and currently in therapy for my social anxiety which stemmed from school. All I can say is that it does, in fact, get better - it just takes time and patience. All the best to you. ❤️
When I first found you I thought you were a joke but when I watched your videos I realised how real they are, most of your videos actually
helped me so thanks mate.
Thank you for this video bro , i get bullied at school for stupid shit i have done earlier in the past , it feels like everyone talks about me bad and if someone knows what ive done , they wont view me the same . Literally this video was the answer i needed
Hang in there and I know it’s tough. I live with anxiety on a daily basis. Thanks for taking the time to share your experience with us. It’s nice to know I’m not alone.
6:16 wasn’t expecting that 😂
A mans gotta do what he gotta do
@@JakPiggott fr fr
@@JakPiggottWonder reference eh?
Thanks Jak for everything you have helped me so much, your so inspiring.
Means a lot bro, keep up the great work ❤
Bro this shit is so relatable, im 17 now but my teenage years were a waste
This was so so so helpful for me to hear, thank you… 🙏
I have a reading and writing disability school was hell . You are the best thank you for your help ✌🏻✌🏻🇨🇦🙋🏼♂️
0:50 I had that exact same one I miss those days
😂
Thanks so much for uploading this. I know I was late watching this, but this was definitely inspiring for me. Thanks for all you do you are improving the lives of countless people. We appreciate it 🙏!
I'm 13, I live in Australia so the school system is a little different with grades/years. I'm going to high school (Year 7) soon, I've been told that I may have mild anxiety and AuDHD. I've seen your videos on my recommendations lots of times but I usually ignored it because my attention span was turned into a 1 second dopamine hit with TikTok and RUclips Shorts and so I didn't bother watching. I finally decided to watch one of your videos today and I legit almost cried, had tears but never came out. I wasn't really bullied at school but I've noticed people give subtle hints that I'm "different". Weird looks, questions, etc (Keep in mind that this started in Year 5-6). Being the quiet kid was normal for me though, I usually liked to be by myself but that usually depended on the situation. I developed this mindset that everyone thought I was weird and I was different, not normal, and I didn't see that in a positive way. I wanted to be like others, rather than myself. I still have this mindset lingering in my head but after watching this video, I related to you so much. Listening to your story made me feel less lonely and feel more comfortable and realise that I'm not alone. I love you man, thank you for making these videos, they help a ton of people out, including me. I'll definitely start watching your videos more.
I struggle with social skills, I honestly don't understand. There seems to be some set of social rules and I didn't get the memo I guess. Trying to fit in is difficult but I'm glad to know that people have similar experiences to me. I might not fit in with the environment around me but I surely do with a certain type of special people :)
I've been afraid to share my experience because I'm afraid of people saying "bro youre too young for depression and stuff like this" or "people have worse problems, get over it", although I haven't been told these directly.
I’m the same as you and used to do fucked up weird stuff and regret it all now and told my parents. Still tryna stop telling the things
Upmost respect big man, always soo assuring to hear how people like yourself go through this aswell and that its almost exactly relatable.. Especially how I found it so frustrating to actually identify what was happening all along, I have to say you’ve gone through alot of bs and actually have a great response and way of dealing with it all currently 😄
it’s like it shapes my whole life
it’s extremely hard and u don’t get it until u go through it
this video helped me sm ty
Jak, you are kind of that or elder brother that somehow everyone just deserves. You know not the one who keeps you laughing not the one who keeps you sad. However the one that gives you crystal clear advice that we genuinely need in our life.
Thanks brother, wish you luck mate.
I'm 17 now and was always an introvert and anxious kid, I never spoke unless I was spoken to, and it always annoyed me when someone asks me why I'm so quiet. My parents tried pushing me out of my comfort zone by making me take part in debaits at my school, but ended up making things much worse, I feel vey uncomfortable surrounded by many people
That's unethical to do.
I mostly relate to your life, and I am 14 and in highschool. I started experiences feelings of loneliness in 3rd grade and I noticed that my friends kept going away from me and isolating for no reason. I was one of the shortest ones back then in elementary, so maybe that could be the reason why people didn't like me much. I was very extroverted at kindergarden through 2nd, but I just became completely introverted in 3rd because of this. Later on, I would have 0 friends in 5th grade which was when I was in zoom class due to covid. I didn't feel stressed out and I felt like I was used to the loneliness. When I went to middle school (6th grade), I found it incredibly hard to make friends, and whenever I tried talking to my past elementary school friends, they would go away from me like they aren't interested in the conversations I am having with them. At this point, I just accepted the fact that nobody liked me, so I didn't even try anymore. I also was 1 of the only few people that kept wearing a covid face mask in the whole middle school years 6th - 8th grade because I felt comfortable with it, and I would feel insecure showing my face and would overthink about how people would react to me. Also, I did get teased occasionally throughout middle school. I did get bullied by some but they stopped bullying me after a week because I had no reaction and I had this "alpha male" personality that he explained. I still have it right now. Change of topic, but, I would never curse or act like a gangster like how others do even today, which makes me look innocent and vulnerable to others. I also am skinny and underweight, and I feel like I really want to gain weight. Anyways today, it's pretty much the same as how I am in middle school except I am taller, I am still skinny, have 0 friends, act like a robot kind of because I'm insecure of how to pose, but nobody teases me just yet. I also have another cause for stress which is my family. My dad would always be in his room with his door shut because he vapes all day in there. He would only come out occasionally to get snacks from the kitchen and he would only say hi to me which is the most he ever talks about to me. On the other hand, my mom is somewhat dismissive when I talk to her about my emotions and sometimes she gets mad at me for it which makes me feel like I can talk to nobody. I am also not comfortable telling my older brother and sister about my life because they'd just see me as a little child with an easy life and with no emotional maturity even though I know so much about life at this point. My cousins also view me as a little child. I am literally always misunderstood by 99% of my relatives. I am not depressed because I don't feel stressed 24/7 but I do sometimes especially when I am overthinking or when thoughts form in the back of my head.
Cry about it
I know it's difficult as I have terrible anxiety too, but seeking for professional help can really help. Ignore people trying to get you down like the person in the replies, I still believe there are good people out there.
@iroapeentertainment5010 Seems like you're pretty insecure. You're disabling comments on your videos, and you haven't posted in 3 years. Just 9 hours ago you decided you would bomb this channel with 26 comments about how being quiet is stupid. That's a stupid way to cope with your insecurities
I can really relate to you, bro. I went to similar experiences
Primary school traumatized me, it was what made me friendless and introvert for middle school.
Primary school is where I had the absolute worst experiences, my "best friend" became my bully and turned the whole fricking school against me. In middle school I had like, no friends. I was beaten up by "bad boys" and was rejected by the whole school.
Atleast I'm in high school now, in the best high school I could ever be in. There are like, no bad boys, people are way nicer. I'm still kinda a bit introvert but I found out I'm actually like, ambivert. At least I don't suffer now, but I still go through some embarrassing moments but it's getting better now. I have hope.
Middle school was actual hell for me, I was suffering from severe depression and with my family constantly trauma dumping and manipulating me into hating my mum it didn’t help. My childhood, my sister would often verbally abuse me, I don’t live with my parents so they couldn’t do anything (I never told mum actually), I lived with my grandparents back then and it’s not like I was neglected or anything but they just never noticed how I felt every time my sister would spat out those hurtful words at me. Because of this I grew up to be the quiet kid, all my thoughts were kept to myself and I never really wanted to speak up unless needed to. My classmates never physically bullied me fortunately but it did feel like they all hated me, I didn’t have anything to redeem myself with either, my grades weren’t high (in fact I had one of the lowest grade in class) and I don’t have the looks to make up for it. My teacher didn’t care either, I don’t think he cared much for the quiet ones, instead putting all his attention to the popular kids. I’m in high school now and I’ve moved over to my parental grandparents side, I haven’t visited the hospital to get re diagnosed but I’m sure my depression went from severe to mild. It’s still there and some days I still struggle to get out of bed but now with new classmates and a much more supportive teacher I’ve started to open up a bit more and participate in class activities. Sure, I still don’t talk much and I don’t think I will because it’s not something I like to do but I’ve learned that it’s perfectly fine and I’m glad that the people surrounding me can understand that. To anyone experiencing depression, I hope you will eventually make it through hard times just like I did, yes the process will be long and tiring but once you’ve found the right people in the right environment, I’m sure things’ll get better. Don’t give up, I’ll be rooting for you:D
I just found ur channel like 2 to 2.5 hours ago and i must say broooooo ur the best brother anyone could ever ask for so the first video that poped up was the "how to stop porn addiction " it was sooo soooo good bro like literally bro like the house concept the foundation n shit bruv, its crazy that how much clearly u can explain things. I feel like watching ur videos are the "ONE LAST GAME" before bed i mean litreally im watching this like 1am and i have school tomorrow but after one video i think i will sleep but another video pops up and i just have to watch that video. And bro trust me u have one of the most soothing voices in the whole world (as i have heard) u seem so dependable even though I've never even talked tp you or met u irl. All i need to say is that u made a very very huge impact on my life even though i have been watching for like maybe 3 hours straight i just want to watch more of ur videos bro. I hope u blow up even moree this generation NEEDS YOU. Thnx for reading this commemt ( i know you will read this comment.)
Bro as someone who used to suffer from severe social anxiety in high school and early college, I can relate to you because these days I feel like I have to overcompensate for all those years I lost. Trying to post new content, trying to gain new followers, wanting attention in social media, and getting extremely jealous when seeing groups of friends. But there's nothing wrong with wanting attention. There's nothing wrong with wanting to have friends. This is just an opportunity to transform our socially anxious narrative into one where you are popular and liked. We need to do action to get those dreams and desires met and break past our comfort zone add chip off more of our social anxiety shell day by day.
Hi Jak. I'm and old guy of 59. I stumbled across this video and it grabbed my by my heart. You see, way way back when I was at school I was exactly like you. My red face, my shyness and my anxiety just like you. You are so brave to tell your story. I could never build up the courage to do it. Anyway, just believe in yourself and fight for what you believe in. My life is ruined through decades of depression and anxiety. Please don't end up like me. Be strong.
your video is really good and like you saw yourself in the "wonder" movie kid, i see myself in you. up until recently i had this big social anxiety and had to get medications for that.
like you, i was a very loud and happy kid. during my first year of middle school, the bullying started. at first it was vocal but later turned to physical and had ended up with me being beaten up behind school. the bullying continued for 6 years and it really transformed me into this really insecure person that is filled with anxeity.
i am 18 now and that wasn't that long ago but i am working on myself. the work had only started a few months ago but i am feeling and seeing changes. i am finally happy. i am finally more comfortable with my body and my boyfriend really helped me throughout this journey. hopefully i will continue to grow like you have grown. thank you for making this video, you are my "wonder" movie tonight. keep your head up and thank you
10:31 this photo made me tear up because i have a dachshund myself and she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. But i am a really shy kid in school. Im in year 8 and its the start of term 4 in two days, im trying to be more confident but i feel like its just the kids in the achool that make me more anxious because i went to primary school with them so they know im shy, i cant be myself, i cry alot and yeah. I feel as if the only thing that can fix this if i move schools. Where nobody knows me. I can be a different person, i can be myself. But theres one thing getting in the way. I still cry alot, im sensitive, i cry over little things. If someone says something abt me , it makes me really insecure again.
I have 8 social tips that helped me through middle school, and I think they can be somewhat useful to you as well.
1. Always be nice to someone when you're first interacting with them, it's fine to tease them once you develop a considerably good relationship to them, but first impressions are pretty darn important.
2. Always keep at least 3 or more close friends for you to talk to anytime in your class.
3. If there's a "popular kid" group in your class, get closer to them one by one, preferably with the most friendly one being the first person to interact with. It'll be easier to interact with the others with more of them familiar with you.
4. Keep a good distance with the troublemakers, don't get too close to them as there's a high chance they'll eventually bring you into something you don't want to do.
5. If you find someone annoying, don't let your feelings get a hold of you. Just keep your conversations between them as short as possible, and ignore them when you can.
6. Arguably the most important tip I have here. Don't talk about yourself too much during a conversation with someone, let them talk about themselves as much as they want unless they're actively asking about you. However, if they're being excessively talkative, then you can try to change the topic, or even end the conversation.
7. If you have a love interest, never, and I mean _never_ talk about it to your friends unless you're 100% sure that they'll keep it a secret. It'll be extremely embarrassing both for you and your crush if rumors about it spreads throughout your school.
8. It's fine being quiet, but don't be too gloomy. Harsh truth but people don't really want to hear about how your test was bad, or that you suck at gymnastics. Frankly, it'll just make the atmosphere dark, and will give them a bad impression of you.
This might seem like a lot of things to keep in mind, but it's really not that hard. I think even the slightest bit of effort to remember these stuff could help you gain more friends and therefore more confidence.
I was the same in year 8. Once 9 came around and I went into a high school, I to realized I could finally be myself. I got many more friends and most people are not as annoying. What I am trying to say it once you get to a new school, things seem to get better. Ofc year 8 will effect it.
If you cry about the littlest things, you will grow up. If someone makes fun of you for something and they are just a dick, don't listen to them because their opinion is not as important as much you think.
If you get embarrassed, people will forget about it. Or if they don't, they might joke about it in a fun way. One time I fell on a treadmill and my pants fell down. I got really embarrassed about it and I got really sad. But people don't actually care.
Just remember, you tend to overthink what people are talking about. I hope you get better soon 😊
Anxiety usually comes from you trying to be someone you aren’t. I went through bad anxiety when I was in my late years of school. I would act like other people to try copy their personality and I only realised later that is definitely not something you should do. I started overthinking how situations went and replayed every conversation I had and picked out the negatives and would beat myself up for it for the next few weeks. I would also plan scripts out in my head on what I should say, very pathetic I know. That is not a way to live trying to be perfect all the time because nobody is. Once you start overthinking is usually when anxiety comes in because you think that everyone is against you and laughing at dumb things you have said, but literally no one cares. Even after i realised this was a stupid thing to do, my brain would just naturally do it in conversations trying to sound perfect. My voice also got a lot quieter when I was talking after a year of doing this and I would became very awkward in conversations because I was trying to be perfect even though I knew it’s a stupid thing to do. Occasionally girls would try talk to me and I would just crumble because my brain was so focused on sounding cool and perfect resulting in me coming across very strange (they obviously didn’t speak to me again). It’s just the brain acting differently to what your mind is thinking. I was also told as well that you should be going into conversations thinking about the other person and not yourself. That way the conversation will actually feel like one and not just you trying to impress the other person
I’ve been doing better recently at being less shy and awkward in situations doing simple things such as saying morning to strangers on the street and making small talk with the cashier. That stuff really does help I’m telling you. I made my brain realise that no one is thinking you’re a weirdo or strange and to grow up
Basically anxiety is just your mind playing tricks on you and brainwashing you into thinking people are going to judge you all the time which is not true at all. Just be yourself and stop pretending to be perfect
My teenage years got ruined due to my upbringing. While my upbringing was good, but due to my family’s adamant way of raising me due to factors I could not control it gave me a lot of anxiety. My family raised me to be what I could best describe as a “waiter boy” always wearing polo button downs, dress pants etc. always wanted me to be respectful, always mature. And even though those are some very beneficial traits to have, to have that forced onto you since birth really set in stone my mentality. My family made my maturity skyrocket to an adult’s formality by the age of 12. It felt good, and I was doing very good in school but I felt, isolated. Since I was raised differently than most of my school peers, it was hard for me to relate with them. This made it hard to makes friends or at least dedicated close friends. Also because of this waiter boy mentality, I also developed perfectionism because my parents expected good grades, but I could not differentiate good and perfect grades, so I would often punish myself whether mentally or physically for getting a 94 on an exam etc.
By the time I got to high school all of these developed to an extreme, I was afraid of dressing slightly trendy because I was afraid of being scolded by my parents, and afraid of being myself with my peers in fear of being judged. That was happening 3/4 years of highschool but by senior year it really hit me that this was my last year with all my peers ive known for 12 years. I just decided that I don’t care what people think of me and that I want to enjoy the last school year being myself. And so I did, it felt freeing, I expected backlash but I got a lot of support. It felt good. But as the year went on I noticed a lot of changes in myself, since I wasn’t constantly overthinking all the time, it felt like my mind has gone empty and my subconscious is a lot quieter. My dialect has also changed as now I don’t spend minutes thinking and forming my thoughts but instead say what I think in the moment which has gotten me in trouble a few times but it feels okay. I’ve also noticed that I have most definitely lost some iq points and at least feel a bit dumber than my younger self but as much as that hurts to take in. I’m much happier now than I was then. I went from completely self conscious, shy, and anxious to completely extroverted, talkative, and animated. I dress how I want now and just feel more myself.
But even so the effects of this change still crack through the new me. I now have some form of OCD since I will have to repeat the same task or actions 4 to 7 times before continuing, it’s harder to hear my thoughts and think, I feel less academically effective, my dialect is not to my liking. I flinch a lot more since I let my guard down. And the anxiety of being alone or different or unlike others still happens, even around friends I find it hard to fit in or always feel like an outcast, it hurts, and I think about why it does a lot. And I cope very badly. I suppress my issues, and hide my feelings. Just so others dont judge me. But at least I feel free, and happy. And while I do miss a lot of the old me I do accept the new me. My biggest issue I face is having like one or two weeks every 3 months where im extremely depressed, self conscious, and anxious but within a day or two I tend to jump back to being myself. I definitely miss the old good parts of me, but im fine losing those perks in order to free the weight off my back and stress on my body.
I missed having a teenager life during my teenage years due to being a waiter boy, so now going on to 20 im acting more like a teen than I ever was, and im happy to finally have that experience. Let me be a teen for once for at least bit. I acted like an mature adult from birth to 18, so let me have 2 years to act a fool teen before going back to being an mature adult for the rest of my life.
Bro I relate so much, except i havent found that version of myself that doesnt care sbout other people. I'm still fighting out of it everyday
I'm 16 years old, this channel has helped me understand myself better, we have very similar stories,your videos do a lot more than you think, thank you
never related to something much I went through thinking I was alone , keep it up
Anxiety killing my life bro 😭
I know, I've been fighting social anxiety for over a year now. Now I have no fear to talk to people. Stay strong, I know you can get through it (:
@@Jak0bTheRobloxGamer 🫂
My face turns red all the time
@@treeguy7930same
@@treeguy7930i run for 3 minutes then my gace gets red