THE PILLARS OF PATRIARCHY 4: WOMEN'S COMPLIANCE
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- Опубликовано: 11 сен 2024
- Today we will be talking about women's compliance in this patriarchal structure we all exist in. Some parts of this will be difficult to hear but I trust in our collective maturity especially as women to be able to handle feedback and synthesize it into action and forward progress.
Thank you for saying the quiet part out loud.
Its a great up-front talk!!
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I wish school had been mor like this. Teaching for the future, teaching people how to resolve conflict.
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Enjoy your day, my friend!
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Much Love
Thank you for such a fantastic breakdown of white feminism and how it's really just diet patriarchy.
Its good to see you here
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Agreed.
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Much Love!!
Literally did a happy dance when I saw this on my fyp! You were great on BurbnBougie's live, too!
Men/patriarchy uses words with no actions behind the words. It's like people believe in the words and not the outcome. It's called Word Salad. Word salad can contain words like... FREEDOM used during slavery; men use the word PROTECTION when he is the woman number one predator; PROVIDER when men are the first to abandon the family... word salad are words that have no action behind them, and the actions are opposite what is being said. Word salad, is also used in many areas of life... esp. in marketing and by politicians.
Yep. When you boil it down, they lie and will always lie. They love lying and will always justify their lies. But we are held to a insane "moral" standard.
100% this ✨
hypocrisy, yes
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males who naturally do not trust anyone also use their own personal definitions of all the words you just used that he alters it's meaning based on whom he's with at the time so he can keep in plausible deniability that his past version of that word means the same for you.
The more women focus on improving our own lives by dissolving the patriarchy, the more we empower all women. Our choices & decisions as individuals, influences more change than we may realise. Women need to be selfish for our own well being. No more self sacrificing. Ladies first. Very inspirational work. Thank you
The damned thing about heirarchies is that you can remove the "top layer" and slide in any substitute, and the heirarchy will continue to function as well as it did before.
Deconstructing Everything means Deconstructing our yte privelege and class privileges as women.
We won't be free until we stop extracting value and status from the women we're conditioned to consider "beneath" us.
Thank you for this important message.
spot on 🎯🎯🎯
@@yv_edit
Thank you. I've been Deconstructing Everything for four years, and I am going pro now as a certified life coach with a focus on Deconstruction from Christianity.
We can't stop with religion only... We must pull it all apart.
This is the challenge of our time.
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@@yv_edit Please cover in depth women's labor strikes in history and steps woman can take to organize and strike. Also doing a topic on the birthrate decline would be nice too.
@human-capital- so true about religion. It was not until I quietly left organized religion that I started to deprogram myself and read about all males centered religions did I realize how much I had been brainwashed. So many women are afraid to have that conversation but its so tied to oppression.
I am happily married to a wonderful man but I prioritize my needs over his, have a master's degree and have always had a career and can support myself when/if I ever need to. I witnessed my mom prioritize my dad at her own expense growing up and I vowed to myself I would not repeat that pattern. Also, you are spot on about white women and how they propped up the patriarchy and left women of color behind.
@@gerhardswanepoel3493 We had our 23 anniversary yesterday so our marriage seems to be working out just fine! Also, why is it selfish for a woman to prioritize a career, but not a man? I am sure you would not send that same comment to a man who said he prioritizes his career! I love having a career in health care serving patients and my husband has always been supportive and proud of me. He has a career too which he prioritizes and I support him as well. Also, the point about marrying someone to start a family is not true for all couples. We got married because we loved each other and wanted to spend our lives together. Also, my grandmother, who was a widow, married a man who was a widower in their 70's and they were too old to have kids. I guess old couples shouldn't marry according to you? Couples who don't want children and couples who are infertile shouldn't marry (or should get divorced according to you.)
@@SP-ml3bs should some things have greater significance than other things or shouldn't they? The 70 year old's and people who cannot have children are their marriages worth the same as people who have 7 kids and contribute to the advancement society? He married you because you were a woman so he was choosing you for the thing you were. Selflessness supposedly and purportedly is a female trait so you have already deceived him and that's why its wrong.
I knew a man who was becoming a Christian priest however in the end he wasn't interested....he told me all the religions in the world...all support a Patriarchal society by the way money is circulated and made in the world..so it's basically impossible to deconstruct... because all countries that have different Patriarchal religions depend on continuing to grow the global economy
These are the same thoughts that I've been having for a very long time. All we can do is survive under patriarchy.
💯 Striving to be the Queen of Shlt Mountain!!
Always
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Much Love!!
Thought provoking series. Self-reflection is usually more difficult than pointing a finger at someone / something else. And I believe, we, as women, can do it successfully. There will come a day when a majority of us no longer buy into the patriarchy, the racism and the classism and we support each other. Goddess willing and the creek don't rise.
I have pretty severe depression and ADHD. If self reflection was an Olympic sport, you'd have my poster on your wall and you'd know my name. All jokes aside, I wonder if there's a lot of us out there do also do a lot of self reflection but got that hijacked by patriarchy so young that it got skewed and turned to into self policing on god mode?
I over think about this very idea sometimes.
@@Biiku_ It's an extremely valid point you have. It took me decades to stop, mostly, blaming and policing myself to misogynistic standards. My hope is that women are more informed and safer than those who have come before. Sometimes, I think it's a miracle that women still rise and function everyday in this global patriarchy. May good fortune smile upon you.
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@@Biiku_YES
How are you no longer going to buy into concepts that you helped create and facilitate? 😂
We were just discussing in our book club how, in literature about American chattel slavery written from the point of view of the enslaved, it’s challenging to find depictions of benevolent white women.
To this day, and still, the second best thing you can be in America is a white woman. I’d bet money the 52% of white women voters who voted for TFG in 2016 knew it on some level. They helped accelerate this reversal of our rights out of fear of losing their place in this hierarchy. They’re totally cool with second place because it means they can still rule over everyone below them.
A white woman who’s unafraid to expose ALL of the truth in order to gain true freedom for ALL women is a dangerous woman indeed. As a black woman, I welcome you to the battle. ✊🏿✊🏾✊🏽✊🏻
Oprah Winfrey's a blackity-black women who was for a long time the richest woman in the world. When you see that don't you think "This crap I believe is it really true? Oprah is the richest woman alive and she's black this conflicts with my world view. Let me abandon my false beliefs and find the truth?"
I WISH i could remember which creator said this in her video about Barbie and the Oscars, I think it was either Leeja Millar or Khadija Mbowe, but she said that feminism wants to support ALL womens' rights; White Feminism is when white women have the same opportunities as white men. Intersectional feminism is when women come together to fight for universal access to opportunity for ALL women by fighting for affordable daycare, for example. White feminism is when Stephanie gets to be the CEO
Feminists getting outraged that Margot Robbie didn't get a Best Actress nomination (even though she did have a nomination for as director for Best Film) while overlooking America Ferrerra's historic nomination for Best Supporting as a WOC is PEAK white feminism
Thank you so much! I love your content...I followed you from Tiktok... I'd love to see more on Project 2025 and preparing in case of the worst... I'm sure a lot of us are worried and the way you break things down would be a comfort tbh ...
Yes Please!
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I love learning from u
Thanks for making these videos
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Great idea, thx for this comment!
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Much Love!
Hi Lisa, brilliant video once again. I would like to point out that the statistic you cited on homicide rates in pregnant women is not the same in each country. Eg in the UK, the leading cause of death in pregnant women is heart disease, whereas in the states it is indeed homicide. To me this highlights how patriarchy and misogyny exists in America to a much more extreme degree than it does in even other developed nations, and just how existing in a more patriarchal culture can further put women's lives in danger during the more vulnerable periods of our lives. And then, this itself highlights how full of cowardice men are at their core but I don't want to continue on a tangent..
Keep up the amazing work! And as a Latina, thank you for encouraging our voices be heard as women of color ❤
As I examine feminism/patriarchal themes through social media platforms such as yours, my algorithms are starting to present more and more anti-feminist influencers who come to the defense of men who have been de-centered, emphasizing their struggles and inability to adjust. Naturally, they blame women and only women for it. So basically, men can't handle the shift so in order for them to be OK, women must shrink. There are many male influencers in this space but also a shocking number of female ones. I like how you say that men just need to figure it out. We've coddled them, made things easy for them, provided nice homes and families for them. They will need to figure this out on their own.
If you move to a matriarchy it will mean there are more women in power. If there is a problem people complain rightly to the people in power. The people in power have a responsibility to help the people they are tasked with ruling. If the women are in power and people complain and the women in power complain about people complaining at them. They are unfit to be leaders but that is another topic.
I clicked so fast! I am really enjoying it. 😊
Same!!!
This video was IMMEDIATELY valuable. I loved that I got the impulse to click
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Glad you're here too!
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Much Love!!
I love brilliant women!!!
Yessssssss❤
The next point is also well taken about womyn, getting rewards for siding with POWER, the men, in patriarchy. Shifting out of patriarchy is a process. We needed some womyn to side with the POWER, the men, to advance, to get to be lawyers, judges, police officers, LEADERS, to then make the next shift out of patriarchy. Many had to suck up the sexual abuse and threats they endured to keep going. When they got in these positions they were able to support WOMYN, and CHANGE LAWS, and CHALLENGE more deeply cases that never had a chance before, or even as DEANS in Post Secondary Education, to allow womyn to RISE and be included. Again, this is not so cut and dried, but because we do not study HERSTORY, we fail to understand the complexity of shifting OUT of this old system. It takes steps, we cannot JUMP OUT of it. These things are important to be discussed and understood, from many sides, so , as you explain, to deconstruct these parts so we can take NEW STEPS on a NEW PATH that is NOT paved in patriarchy. Thanks for pointing these things out to be brought to the surface and looked at. It takes a LOT Of courage and research to put all these puzzle pieces together, in a system that has made it VERY hard to actually look at it and dive into the damage it causes.
Let’s not forget the intersectionality of age groups as well. You mention that there shouldn’t be any spots, however later on continue to say that Taylor is taking away spots from younger women. She doesn’t. The system does. The way patriarchy pits younger women against older women and vica versa and women internalizing and upholding it is quite tragic as well. Thank you for your wonderful and outspoken videos, this is such an important conversation!
I didn’t understand that part, how is she taking away spots from younger women ? This is her career in the music industry which is very competitive…No artist should be held responsible to make themselves less relevant to make another artist attain more fame. It’s like asking a business owner to be less successful to make way for competition in a capitalist society? Genuine thought from a non Swiftie
Great series
Agreed!
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Much Love!!!
I love these series! You are articulating many points that I've been thinking myself. Although I would really love it if I was able to see some more actionable points to overthrow the patriarychy...
I wish I could love not just like this. So well done!
Honest Question: why would WW not want ALL women to win ? Do they want to keep extracting labor from those who are in marginalized groups while staying in control of the system?
Yes, that's exactly it... Those in power aren't generally keen to give it up. As long as our structure is hierarchal, in order to get to the top, others have to be under you.
@jibarabicha4853 We aren't taught to think. We are taught to serve. That other women aren't "real women". When faced with it, we deflect because rather than recognize that we are morally bankrupt and have sold out everyone for crumbs, it's safer, psychologically, to believe our fathers and mothers and sisters and brothers really love and value us as full humans and people and not as incubators for more white babies and nothing more.
It doesn't excuse anything. It's just fear. A fear we all need to stare down and overcome because people are dying. Our cowardice is killing people.
Sort of. WW benefit from woc beneath them in the hierarchy. Think about how ww in the first world continue to buy fast fashion produced in sweatshops in Bangladesh and India, where mainly women work.
Hey thank you so much for bringing this up. As a WW I became aware of this about a year ago and I really need someone to be sharing their perspective more on this so I can better understand. Please continue sharing.
Why do white women talk about themselves in third person like you guys have no self awareness? 😮
We can't beat them at their own game. Their game has winners and losers. I can't enjoy winning at others' expense. We need a new framework. For everything.
Sharing this with every woman i know ❤❤❤
I love this series of yours! When it appears on my feed, I click instantly :D thanks for your awesome work! Cheers from Poland ;) (we have a pretty hard core flavour of patriarchy here because of all that roman catholic brainwashing 😅)
As a white woman, non binary person, who has birthed three white daughters, I've had to face the fact I had children prior to being fully healed from a traumatic childhood, before becoming more politically aware and before fully knowing myself at the age of 21.
At the age of 35, from what I understand now, through therapy and introspection and talking to wiser people and women in many walks of life (I still don't know shit about shit) I believe the best thing we can do is this: consider very carefully if we want kids after a lot of consideration and only if we can have them as a single person and only after decentering men and patriarchy from our lives. Including only the people in our lives who only add to our lives. Care for those who care for us, I mean in a way that isn't based on some sick sacrificial way that we didn't choose. If we choose not to have kids, and if medically logical and feasible and financially available, sterilize ourselves so we cannot be used for the state or against our will.
I think it's on us, as white women and femmes, to own our shit. When we do a racism, or a sexism, or a classism, own it. "What I said was racist. You deserve better. " and leave it at that. Don't ask for forgiveness. Don't drag it out. Own your shit.
The best thing we can do is heal our own, raise our kids to be better and more aware white kids. White shame and guilt will solve nothing. White anger and action and respect for our sisters in the struggle will do a hell of a lot more. Listen to them. Read their books and listen. Put your white body on the front lines in protest, without stealing the spot light with words. Take baton hits. Let the world see you show up.
I know I repeated a lot of what she already said, I just wanted to make sure my voice was added and repeated with hers.
Wow!❤
I’m so glad you’re on RUclips now
Awesome series!
Thank you for another great video!
I would love to hear your thoughts on narcissism and navigating relationships with people that either have narcissistic tendencies or who are diagnosed narcissists. I’m not on TikTok, so if you cover this topic there, maybe this isn’t an original thought 😂 but I’m sure you’d have a great amount of wisdom to share regarding this topic. Thank you again!
Thanks for doing this next section on patriarchy and how womyn's compliance is a pillar. Also, something to understand in this, is that "some" white womyn did not include black's or minorities . MANY DID. Gloria Steinem, a HUGE leader in the feminist movement Gloria was along side Flo Kennedy and Shirley Chisolm and brought Wilma Mankiller in to her Ms. Magazine crew to bring inclusion of ALL womyn. That the PRESS did not and continues to not write about this, is political. Continuing this misperception is harmful to our solidarity. Something Gloria Steinem worked to talking about through her years as a leader in this. She even gives huge kudos to them helping her find her voice, as she was a writer. Two things and Three things can be true at the same time. Two things would be that yes, SOME white womyn did not include black womyn or minorities...and MANY DID. And some black womyn did not want to work with white womyn. Many black womyn talked about struggling to stand up for womyn's rights, as they were seen as traitors to the black men in their community. ADD misogyny to this whole thing, which IS a huge part of patriarchy...programming womyn to hate each other, blame womyn, be competitive with each other (divide and conquer) and you have this mess. It is NOT as cut and dry as is being presented. I have a lot of compassion around all this because, this system of patriarchy is wired to light a fire under all this. Thanks for calling it out, AND we need to reach to see that this was not wide spread.
Part of Lisa's talk addresses this very thing: The "not ALL ww" thing is as moot a point as it is when men and pickme's say, "not ALL men". It's counterproductive bc it cannot ever lead to solution-oriented thinking on a broad societal level. Why not, you ask? Because it identifies the root of the problem as solely an individual one in the present, rather than a broad societal problem rooted in the past, whose impact ripples outward into the present, manifesting in individuals.
You are such a QUEEN
The set is complete
Yessssss.....and so insightful
Greetings from Scandinavia! I really enjoyed your deep knowledge and passion for the subject matter. Here in Sweden, we have gender-neutral parental leave, with 3 months reserved for each parent, and I think this was the single biggest contributing factor in forever re-defining masculinity in the country. Today, men take out 1/3 of all parental leave days, while women have the highest employment rate in the European Union.
Thank you for your analysis and for the graphics!
When I realized my X wouldn’t even plan a camping trip after I helped him with his life goals, I left. How do you feel about taking revenge?
Revenge is underrated 😈
Oh yay!! Been waiting for this one!🎉
Love the charts: patriarchy/matriarchy.So true!
A lot of what's happening right now reminds me (in small ways) of the study of the civil rights movement during Jim Crow era. I know its a stretch but part of the process was peaceful noncompliance, i.e.the bus boycott (decentering men), protesting for racial equality (protesting for reproductive rights), even as deep as deconstructing internalized racism as a person of color (women having to deconstruct internalized misogyny). The idea during the civil rights movement was that giving a person of color equal rights and equal opportunity does not take away another persons power or rights. It's the same with what is happening to women. Im just glad that im living during a time when we are having open conversations about deep and challenging subjects. We all need to work together to create a new/better world for future generations. Great video and very thought provoking.
I’ve been waiting for this one ✨💃🏽
i just want to send this to every woman in my life
Do it!!
💯thank you for saying what everyone needs to hear 💯🙏🏽💚
This was a great video series, thank you so much!
from the additions to this part... I think in some ways this part is idealistic
women outside feminist circles tend to spend a lot of time criticizing their acquaintances, or celebrities, influencers... without realizing what benefit it will bring them, except for the ability to judge other people and better understand human behavior.
men are less likely to criticize each other, their social circles focus on learning to exploit others, men are more likely to see benefits in communication
I think you've seen studies about the differences in male and female friendships. female friendships are more personal, more emotionally intense, but tend to fall apart due to personal hostility. male friendships tend to focus on spending time together, with little emotional depth but more room for collaboration
this tells us that women tend to view relationships more personally and the task of feminism is to extinguish intra-female competition and create the ethics and benefits of cooperation + how to deal with men's exploitative dark triad tendencies
its about 30 years too late for me to finally learn all of this stuff. I guess better late then never but the reason I'm learning it is because i have been discarded for not being useful to a man after I took care of him when he had a psychotic break. So what she is saying is true ladies. After that extremely stressful period, I lost a lot of my vitality and became very ill, and my entire body changed as a result of that, I actually lost a lot of my beauty and so on many fronts, my utility to this man, who is now much better off than he was when he met me, has basically kicked me to the curb and I'm probably going to end up sleeping on someones mattress for the next 6 months while I try to figure out how to find a place to live.
I BE SO EXCITED TO SEE YOUR NEW POSTS❤😂
The conversation you pointed out between Nicki Minaj and Taylor Swift had these words back and forth, points out something important, for sure, THAT womyn can NOW speak up. Call out what THEY BOTH SEE and feel and believe and check it out. This IS a HUGE step out of patriarchy for womyn. THEY can't know the perfect way to say things. And when you study Brene Brown's work, a famous researcher on the "rumble", a way OUT of oppressive speech, this IS so deeply important to do, which is what Nicki and Taylor are doing and learning as they go. I am not sure what is going on with this 'filter' being used , that has made this leap to being patriarchal. Taking ONE side and not seeing the communication happening, and all that is being brought to the surface to be revealed, is missing the mark and just pitting womyn against each other. ugh. We can't fix the master's house with the master's tools. Using patriarchy language and filters, that I am seeing here in this video ( that I did not see in the other 3 videos) , will NOT help us shift out. I suppose you can't even see how your choice of framing and wording IS pitting these womyn against each other...our programmed EGO's are a huge challenge in shifting out. We are only human. Doing the best we can. It strikes me though, that things could be worded in a way that do NOT pit womyn against each other , here. Yet, language is just being learned, and framing is just being learned, as we move through this next wave of feminism towards equality.
Loved this series.
Betty Broderick (not advocating what she did) BUT, she is an extreme example of centering HER husband, thinking there is a benefit, instead of centering herself.
An extreme example of NOT getting a payoff or reciprocity from her husband, in putting HIM first.
It’s not hard to see that she thought Investing in HIS success would benefit their family. It did not.
Google her name. A cautionary tale for being “selfless” at your own expense…
Well that's what she was taught to do, cant really blame her.
But i tell you more there are plenty of women who are the main breadwinners and are also left in the wind like Betty's husband.
thank you, your work is so valuable
Great subject!! I’m interested. Thank you.
The racism conversation is amazing. It feels very very very high level & I wish there could be more clear examples.
In addition to philosophy of the issue (& I so appreciate the way you explained this), more specifics that include today’s issues would be hugely helpful. Taylor Swift & celebrity culture doesn’t feel relatable to how white women can best help other marginalized women & mothers.
What exactly are the issues that women of color/minority groups need addressed first? If we can talk directly about examples of the issues today that need to be addressed by feminism (that white women might not see) - that will be a very productive conversation.
I am a white mother of three, 50 years old. If the most important fringe issue that must be addressed first is making sure Swahili women have access to goats, I will start collecting goats tomorrow to walk over there.
We have real work to do, the entire society is collapsing (which I think is great) I think it would be so cool talk specifics of what the issues in question are to bring this point home in the most productive way. It’s not just rights we are fighting for this time, it’s an entirely different world & I definitely want to understand directly & clearly how we ensure no woman is left behind. Like basically who’s wt a$$ do I gotta kick for that Swahili woman to get those goats cause unlike Taylor, I’m on it. 😂
Birthstrike!
I think what you are attempting to say is that it's not so much about WW being on top of patriarchy without men, but WW being on top of the caste system created through colorism where whyte is superior to all other races. As least that is how I am hearing you!
Taylor Swift wrote the Song the MAN to showcase the patriarchy, not for HER to do this. Interesting that you do not see this. She also invites multicultural AND different sizes of dancer. This does help solve really important aspects of patriarchy. THAT she is at the top allows her to bring in ALL people. She is not at the TOP as you are claiming that she is. You are looking at HER through the lens of patriarchy and NOT seeing what she is breaking down. I am not sure why you are not seeing this. Hmm?? I know there is a lot of hate out there, misogyny , against her, of course. Maybe this is clouding the judgment here and not seeing how she is breaking down huge barriers many womyn could not. THAT she brings so many IN WITH HER, are facts being missed here, and things the patriarchy would NOT do. THAT she invites people to sing together, not silence them to listen to the KING, is something that is NOT patriarchal. So many examples missed here. hmm.
@laurettaleone6482 two things can be true at once. Taylor Swift can be better than what we had as girls 30 years ago, but just barely. Sure she has dancers that look like more of the population in the US, and isn't married and is less likely to slut shame etc. but can we admit that the bar is in hell here? She still centers her whole emotional well being around men who suck, she still pits herself against other women, still is part of perpetuating white womanhood that sucks for everyone, and has power that could be used for more and chooses not to. She has the option to hide in her mansion and her bus and hide behind her money while the rest of us suffer. My own kid likes her, I let her enjoy her music and be a kid and dance and sing because childhood is short. But as she gets older, we have these conversations. They're hard. They suck. "Do you think a black woman could say that? Who do you think made that dress? How much do you think that roadie got paid? How much does private jet fuel cost?" Not all at once, but it's important.
Awesome!!! I was waiting for this!! Perfect timing 💯❤️👍🏾
My fault is definitely a lack mindset. I'm gonna watch that.
I love yoy
This needs to be a college course for real!
Great video, I’m excited to share it with the young ladies at my work.
Sweetie, patriarchy is in every system, it just depends on what the men in each society allow. some societies are evil and some good, again this falls on the shoulders of the men and the laws they enforce and agree to. Every system is hierarchical in nature. At some point there has to be an authority structure. It's foolish to deny what is literally in front of our faces.
So you have decided to center the patriarchy then? That sounds like what you are saying…
🙏🏽
Im actually confused at what you are talking about when you talk about the top. You can have diversity at the top jobs in the country. The jobs with the most power and or the most income BUT the vast majority of us no matter what shade our skin is are going to be working basic jobs just making it.
I work a basic job and Im making it. Not far above the poverty line like my mother, and her mother and her mother all yte and deep in or barely above the poverty line. Im not trying to crawl up above any other women. Im just happy to not have to pair with a man. Im free to be singie even at my low income. I get to live in peace and not serve a man if I dont want to and i want that for every woman on earth. To be safe free and able to sustain without a man if she desires.
And yet you're not Called white trash or demonized because you're white nor are you associated with poverty the ghetto 😂 and violence. Even though you're very prevalent in those arenas 😂
I love your content but I love it for the carefully selected facts. Now when you say men and women have different reward systems in their brains, its just a lie. We font center men out of the goodness of our hearts. Its actually a patriarchal lie. We are just as healthily selfish, as men, but the game for us, women, is set up differently. Directly centering ourselves will be met with disdain, that is why we are forced to reach through a man - and pretend its for his benefit from our good womanly nature. Instead of being allowed to be direct. To find and build our own fortune, instead of becoming a coach and mother to a man who can directly participate for a fortune.
Interesting perspective. Thanks
I have so many friends with a partner described in this post. Some left and others stay in the abusive relationship.
Yup, I needed to hear this, thank you
Could you do more of the flat circle of patriarchy?
Loved the series. Thank you.
😘😘😘👏🏽
I wish we were taught this in school or at least in sex education
Despite being "white passing", this video explains so well my beef with what I now know is also called "liberal feminism" or "girlboss feminism". I don't want to be a girlboss (also I am non binary aligned so...), I don't think the solution is more women CEOs but to change the whole system.
For me, 4B includes having nothing to do with working for companies. I created a business I can do with my kids so we rarely ever have to contend with males. And when we do, guess who makes the worst clients?Single men first, married men second, their wives third.
All single women are the absolute best clients.
Every once in a while we will work with a married couple who are happy & thriving, they are the best clients too. But this is very rare.
New sub here. Great series! Idk if there is research about a couple of topics that interest me. We see how the patriarchy hurts men to the point that they are "failing and flaling", and withdrawing from life. There's the male loneliness issue. The older generations are too far gone.
1)What can we do/ be done to help Zoomer/ Generation Alpha boys and men to become emotionally intelligent AND fully participate in household duties?
I saw a video about an author, Richard Reeves, who had an interesting take of one way men could move forward. He used the term H.E.A.L.( health, education, administration, and literacy). It includes stereotypical female dominant jobs( teaching, nursing, caregiving). He said that decades ago, there was such a big push for girls to go into S.T.E.M. fields, and now there are more. The problem is H.E .A.L. jobs pay less because mostly women work in them. The pay would have to increase though.
2) What do you think of encouraging men and boys to explore H.E.A.L. jobs? Do you think it could help to weaken the patriarchy? 🙂
Ope part 4 not 3
ik I can’t believe I forgot to change the frickin graphic 😂😂😂
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Love that top on you 💕
I get what you are trying to say but it’s coming from a USA centric outlook. I live as a expat in a country where I am the minority as a white woman and I can say that the women in this country are ok with leaving me behind in their movement because it’s always about the majority it’s not about black white asian etc … who is the majority … so yes what you say is right for the US but globally it does not apply, you have to look at who is the majority. in fact expat women in this country have been abused severely by the men in this country and the women in this country turn a blind eye because we are not considered citizens and we are considered second class - being white or any other color because we are the minority and therefore not important. This happens in all countries.
Her point holds true for your situation too. Those majority women are fighting for their rights in some ways. It’s not complete until they also fight for yours. Unless We are all free , none of us is .
@@Esme26433 agreed I guess I just get tired of the point of view that it’s only white women, I haven’t lived in North America for 20 years so I can’t relate when she says that. Like I said I don’t doubt this is the situation in the US but for a global perspective it’s the women who hold the majority that are doing this.
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there's a question mark sound at the end of each sentence
No need for a studio ! If you want to invest in anything for your bg, get a light projector or video prohector foe mood lighting.
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Much Love!!!
How do we opt out? When do we strike?
I want everyone to have merit not the patriarchy , but it always benefits men only , so WW , we have had enough but it is merit not color or ethnic or sex! MERIT ONLY !
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I am sorry but all the conversations about tik tok trad wives are not at all intersectional. A lot of women stay home because they have disabling medical conditions and they are all too ashamed to make tik toks about it and often times the critiques of women who stay at home are just cruel because they are criticizing a fantasy and the real people are hurt by it. All of that is rooted in the ableism of believing disabled people aren't possibly capable of finding a partner and being cared for.
This was a great video but I always have to say this whenever it comes up because the discourse is always horrendous.
Caregiving is not valued under patriarchy as well. People should be allowed to care for one another and have it be seen as valuable labor.
You might be conflating trad wife life with staying at home or caregiving. They all require leaving the work force but for very different reasons. Trad wives specifically stay home and become subservient to their husbands in order to uphold the belief that the man is responsible for how they live, how they think, and how they behave. It's the totalitarian ideology they are veiling behind being a "good" wife with and "easy" life is what others are critiquing and are trying to bring to light. Staying home due to health or economic circumstances is completely personal and understandable.
@@SmallBobby yes but people are critiquing stay at home girl friends stay at home wives and trad wives all under the same umbrella while not recognizing who is actually staying at home unable to secure their financial independence and unable to get disability payments if they are married to someone making too much money. If you aren't making the caveat to explain the ladies on tik tok are creating a content fantasy and you aren't recognizing some people are disabled and have to depend on others, just like abled people depend on their boss to pay them, you are inadvertently shaming way more disabled people than you ever will trad wives on tik tok.
@SmallBobby but are they though? How can you tell people they are foolish for not being employed and having their own money and not be critiquing disabled people too? It's not just the critique it is the callous advice that goes along with it.
@@leotardbansheeit’s not a conversation of disabled people because they are not being brought up. That’s an issue that needs its own attention and movement if you feel that way. No one is thinking of trad wives and then thinks of disabled people. Stop conflating two different situations.
After taking the bother to fully watched all 4 videos of Patriarchy series after being recoomended for being more "well researched" that the average fast consumption feminist content available on youtube and after that I've come to a full conclusion of the discourse this content creator is trying to push and I'll add my criticism on the following points:
This entire exposition has been vulgarly ahistorical and anti-anthropological, like most western feminist discourses the usage of patriarchy, despite being covered in academic babble, is NOT a concept that means what feminist think it means: Patriarchy is a concept developped from the schools of thought of Structuralist Anthropolgy around the decades of 40's and 50's and not-so surprisingly the word was used NOT to describe the conditions of modern day women in western industrialzied democracies but rather to describe systems of KINSHIP in ethnorecord the studies of human societies and tribal settings: actual patriarchal societies not only look particularly different to the modern US or even most 1st world countries, they involve practices such a patrilinaeility, patrilocality and patrifocality, the practice of bride exchange in order to unite or solve problems between tribal clans, a lot of these are not only practices range from illegal to extremely rare is today's industrialized societies but also are completely unmentioned in the overwhelming majority of feminist theorizations of patriarchy, and the reason is simply, patriarchy is just a buzzword in feminist lingo, it's a word both ambigous enough but also clear enough that it can refer to any form of men overpresentation in anything or to, let's say, men not crying with romcoms or whatever, the patriarchy that feminists so urgently want to liberate everyone from acts and behavies in ways so inconsistent and contradictory that the same phenomena can be considered a "terrible consequence of patriarchy inflicting its damage on vulnerable people" to "the patriarchy crafting a new hyperfefficient agent design to dismantle all the progresses made by feminism"; a clear example of this is the transgender debate, depending on the feminist who you ask you to trans people can be "victims of patriarchal cisheteronormativity" to "degenerate fetishists and voyeurs that want to invade women's space and destroy all the progreses made by feminism" and examples of discrepancies like these are abundant.
Further reading: The Elementary Structures of Kinship by Claude Levi-Strauss
Another I'm taking concerned with is the segment dedicated to the myth of masculinity, in that video yv indagated in the so called "pervasive damaging effects" that fragile masculinity, for this she links several studies associated with subject and I've the suspicioun that Yv didn't really bother reading said studies for the next reason: Some of them are not data collections or studies that prove causations but simply article that compile theories and arguments that, by themselves, do not represent a proof in itself of the arguments and concepts being presented, other's make use of the methodologies and survey data that not only is of dubious quality but makes use of methods that have been subjected to debate of whether they're indicators of anything whatsoever other than what the researchers wanted to find from the very beginning, by this I mean the study based on the Precarious Manhood Survey test, the resuts from those studies might seem like eye openers to those who have never indigated on how "gender scales test" are produced but for those who have it's more than obvious how unreliable and untrustworthy they are, others while not being fully speculative they really are just a papers that make literature overview that after being read really open the legitimate possibility of being interpreted in ways that do not support the general thesis of these video essays (or that have much less explanatory power that the thesis claim they have), such as the prioritization of men and boys interest over women's and girls while the very articles argue that the physical and mental health crisis that men and boys might go throught cannot just be summarized into "men don't go to theraphy because of masculine socialization" and leave a reasonable and much more viable explanation that, the psychiatric instutions simply aren't well equipped on how to deal with struggles and pains that men and boys carry with them.
Continue here:
Another issue, the stuggles that men and boys go through that feminists simply cannot talk about because it gets in the way of their views about men: I'll be pretty straght forward with this, feminists ever so rarely talk about male victims of domestic violence or of sexual abuse at the hands of their female partners; the reasons are more than obvious: becaues it contradicts their views on how sexual violence looks like, on how men and women might get to interact with each, it contradicts their views on the violence that men suffer from as something "that it's only perpetrated by other men" and it also contradicts their views about women, who apparently only do a very limiited list of things in their existance: "Being subsimissive handmaiden, pickmeisha, gender traitors, whatever" or being "Empowered feminists sister who are gonna take down male supremacy by any means necessary". The most important aspect is that feminist NEED to ignore in this issue is that the violence and injustices that men and boys suffer from are do not only NOT fit the patriarchy narrative but also it's meant to distract from the fact that men suffer from these injustices because of feminist political intervention: it's not because of "patriarchy" that men and boys cannot be recognized as victims of sexual or domestic violence, it's because of feminist written policies during the Second Wave of Feminism that argued that those crimes ought to be thought exclusively as crimes that ONLY men commit against ONLY women and every men or boy who claimed victimization was regarded as actually an abuser who's victim finally acted in self defense and thus he deserved carceral punishment. If you think domestic or sexual violence perpetrated by women are rarities that should not bother the general discourse then I'm sorry to tell you that that it's demostrably false, studies from the 2017 find that, when men get asked the question "have you been r*ped" before they most likely say that they weren't, but when you ask them "Have you been forced to participate in intercourse against your will?" those who say yes skyrockets.
I'll also add that scholars, activists and researches such as Richard Gelles, Erin Pizzey, Susan Steinmentz and Murray Straus that did great work since the 70's on thte matter of domestic violence perpetrated by women and organized to support men who were victims of said abuse where publicly harrased, vilified and often attacked with de/ath threats by feminist activists and the reason was simply, the things they were finding with their research simply couldn't be accomodated into a "patriarchy narrative" so they just pretended that it didn't exists.
Further reading: Sexual Victimization by women by Lara Stemple: www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1359178916301446
Male Sex/ual Victimization by Women by Jasmine Madjlessi
link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-023-02717-0#:~:text=In%20the%20present%20sample%2C%2071,and%20post-traumatic%20stress%20disorder.
How Feminist Theory Became (Criminal) Law by Claire Houston
repository.law.umich.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1043&context=mjgl
Final point, Matriarchy: In her 4th video Yv describes "matriarchy" as a full circle of support that goes outward, she also adds numerous positive traits to it such as love, balance, gift economy, reciprocity and so on while describing patriarchy as a pyramid accompanied with stereotypical "evil" things such as violence, domination, explotation and the like, the problem I have with this demostration is not only that it is a caricature complete designed on arbitrary designations of what the author believes a matriarchy would look like, arguing pretty much that patriarchies are irrevokably "evil" why the "matriarchies" are seemingly morally perfect.
To me this was really the starting point in which I've notices that Yv not only didn't really care that much about research as much as she was bragged to be but also she's completely disconnected from the academic debates and disciplines that actually try to make sense of these concepts. The word "Matriarchy" at least as how we imagined it in the modern western mentality is just a society "run by women" and that said society would be morally superior because "women are morally superior" but these conceptions are not new but also weren't even created by women nor feminists, the theory of Matriarchy originates from a book from the 19th century titled Das Mutterrecht (The Matriarchy) by anthropologist Bachofen that argued that, of course, in the origins of time humanity was a matriarchal society that lived in the piece in harmony with nature and that human groups were peaceful and egalitarian, this "Eden" was disrupted with the discoverement of men's role in reproduction, thus they started givin' importante to which kids were theirs in order to legimitize they inheretance and property, this is what he called "The abolition of the Maternal right" or what Frederick Engels would lated called "The great defeat of the female sex"; conveniently enough the fantasy (because that what it really is, a fantasy) of matriarchy came not only with an epic poem of a great past where women were in charge of everything but also a prophechy in which the patriarchy of the modern would eventually produce the technological developments that would allow the matriarchy the take over once again.
All this sounds amazing but the truth is that the theories about "the Matriarchal past of humanity" not only crumble at scrutiny to the point that a lot of acadamics -rightfully- will tell you that actual matriarchies have never existed in any side of world or in human history, they might have found clans with matrilineality or matrilocality but those sistems of kinships DO not imply that men were deprived from political and economic or that women/mothers are the focus of their societies. And in case this thought comes in your: "But about this or that matriarchal tribe that they found in some place on Chine or India?" Lemme tell you, for all its purposes, the word matriarchy has NO consistent, unanimous definition of what it evens mean to the point that the debates in the ethnographical and anthropological disciplines still cannot fathom how to end
Further reading: The Myth of Matriarchal Prehistory by Cynthia Eller
My conclusion is that this serious of videos was much more of a mas/turbatory/feel-good-woo feminist tranquilizers, 2 full hours of a young woman talking alone trying to sell you a story of the world, of feminism, of the suffering and conditions of boys and men, of women and girls that feels incredibly satisfactory to hear, but ultimately is just bs that falls apart to anyone capable of scrutinizing the evidence or that is experience enough to not be surprised by arguments that have been rebranded over and over for the past 5 decades
WW know the patriarchy does not benefit any Woman. The blame game does not help the matriarchy at all. Only the patriarchy must really be behind this message as the division just continues. It seens as the Feminist movement was made by those who have hid behind WW but of another race. .
I’m sorry, you’re uncomfortable with her message. However, many white women have been very comfortable with patriarchy as long as it benefited them in someway. That is what she’s trying to say in this video. There are many examples in history to prove her right.
White women need to be blamed more actually. Yall slip under the radar 😂 constantly but you're steady here talking smack about men you guys birth. Men who are also your brothers and uncles and fathers. Its hilarious 😂 take responsibility for the men in your communties white women 😂 and stop acting like a victim and things happened unbeknownst
We can easily make you compliant, whether you accept it or not.
@2 min...has flashbacks of swerfs blaming sex workers for how they adapt under patriarchy.
I’m surprised that you didn’t mention trans women at all. It appears to be a blind spot
trans people are the minority and always will be. in the grand scheme of things, trans women don't move the needle much in regards to relationships between men and women. a big factor of that is trans women's inability to naturally produce children. right now, the world leaders are freaking out about the declining birth rate. do you think that they are thinking about trans women when it comes to this topic? absolutely not. they will focus on cis het women and men to remedy this issue. i know trans people want to be included in every conversation but that's literally not possible.
NOT RELEVANT, and don’t you dare suggest black BIOLOGICAL women are the same as trans women struggle wise-further dehumanising us… If you want that discussion HAVE IT YOURSELF
@@femmefatale71 leave this was not meant for you.
@@shivaramoutar5333actually it’s not meant for you.
32:37 is where I'm going to raise an eyebrow here
Patriarchy is when inheritance is passed down from father to eldest son. That hasn’t been true in thousands of years. Inheritance, the family fortune, tends to be passed down to a surviving wife. What’s the point of saying ‘patriarchy’ 10 times every minute? I’ll guess, it’s basically meant to be a slur word. it just a way to allow yourself to be a not-see? Or is being just a Nazi not enough for some? If you really want to fight this ‘patriarchy’ choose as a partner a man shorter, smaller, and weaker than you. Challenging gender roles, and efforts to reduce spousal abuse against women, must be a priority. Oh yeah, marry a man who earns less money than you and one who is younger than you. Nothing’s more important than challenging this patriarchy, except challenging gender roles, and efforts to reduce spousal abuse against women. Don’t allow yourself to be a victim of patriarchy a minute longer.
@@magicsinglez
Look there’s a mad man
Good talk to go with my coffee 😊
I can bop to Taylor's music, but you really nailed why I don't fully love her. Just look at who she is dating... the baby boy of the NFL. I guess she got tired of the tortured poet types. 😉
Also, this is why I gave up on the dream of climbing the corporate ladder. It's full of complacent women and power tripping m ales. I work from home, because offices are breeding grounds for h arrassment, and no one does anything about it. Thanks for this thought-provoking discussion!! 💜
so well said!!!
@yv_edit Thank you! 💜 And unsolicited advice for anyone reading, always know how to make your own money. Have multiple streams of income. Align yourself with successful m ales. But never trust a system designed to work against you 🎀
@@princessmorebucks this🎯🙌🏻