In a nutshell, if you leave every family chore and household job to your wife, and then expect sex at the end of the day, she will resent you for it. A marriage is about balance, respect and partnership
Biggest bullshit I’ve ever heard. Sex is non transactional. Do u find a ‘hot’ guy attractive cuz he cooks and cleans for you? NO. You find him attractive cuz he’s Hot & acts like a man. Men don’t listen to women. You don’t ask a fish in how to fish. You ask the fisherman. Women are easy to work out. Be Hot, be A man, be in shape, be sexually Attractive & make her orgasm. Simple. Don’t over complicate this shit.
fai ali what does it mean to act like a man? The same thing it meant since the dawn of time which is a minimum of 4 millions years. Take you’re ‘Woke’ modern day Social programming somewhere else. What does it mean to be a man god 🤦♂️
What do you exactly mean by “work hard” what kind of things do you have to do to keep it P.s I’m not married yet but scared to lose that spark too along the way and I ask myself sometimes
@@rukiawarsame4794 I think she means you have to make an effort in marriages because it can get boring if that makes sense. You have to do things to keep marriage exciting and fresh. Like whether it's dressing up, going out for dinner dates, romantic getaways, or just doing things in the bedroom a bit differently it just depends on what your partner likes and the effort has always has to be mutual!! You don't have to go out your way but as I said it's an individual preference after a few years into marriage you'll see what I mean but at the moment don't stress if you're single. You learn as you go along the way. Enjoy the single life x
Honeymoon phases go out the window. However, talking to your husband about these feelings is absolutely fine and halal. No shame when it comes to bedroom activities. There is no need to feel despair. This is normal. Absolutely. My husband is in heart medications and his libido is out the window. He knows that, feels bad and guilty. But there are other adult ways to be intimate. I am patient too. Its all about patience and communication.
@boimackhead maybe its sad but at least she will try to change some stuff and the husband needs to say what he wants her to be like ..can buy her the type of clothes he likes on her.. talk more ..then they can find the spark again ..better thinking everything is fime when its not .. n it may get worse with time! Dont u think?
I love how open and honest you both are! Especially as sex isn’t a topic that is widely discussed with in the Muslim community so there isnt many people you can approach for advice. I’m so glad that you guys are making these advice videos again, keep doing what you are doing. Lots of luv
Right after giving birth and throughout my pumping journey I absolutely had no desire to have sexual relationships with my partner. It could definitely be the hormonal changes and just being tired. These feelings are normal. Give yourself time. It does get better in my opinion.
Sid is spot on with this! You can educate many men who dont get this simple fact of how women’s brains are so different when it comes to intimacy. And Dinas comments about sex as a chore if the man isn’t helping is sooooo true.
it's great advice but the problem is the woman in the e-mail probably married this guy without feeling physically attracted to him. She prioritized other aspects over appearance and that's completely fine. But that's what you get when you do this and she should accept it how it is. I don't think it's healthy to imagine other ppl during sex. It means you're not turned on by them at alll
Yes you are right she married him because he was a nice guy but she isn't attracted to him 😬 I completely understand where she is coming from but even in Islam it says it's very very important to be attracted to your spouse now we know why that is because otherwise you will imagine yourself with others 😐
Yep and I think this is the issue they missed in the video. The woman in the email was highlighting that she doesn’t feel a strong physical/sexual attraction to her husband and you can’t force attraction.. it’s either there or it’s not. Physical attraction is the basis for building a healthy sexual relationship. I don’t think the woman felt this from the get go! But some more information would of been helpful for Sid & Dina.
@@lailahkhan2683 This is 100% true. I dont even look at guys in that way, but what happened to me was strange. I was speaking to this guy I wasn't attracted to (in the hopes the attraction would somehow kick-in.. it didn't) and as time wore on, I found myself randomly checking out guys whenever I was out. It wasn't even intentional, it's something my mind would automatically do and I had to force myself to stop it. When the talks ended with that guy, I went back to my usual self and didn't check out guys anymore. It was very very strange thing indeed. Your mind simply cannot help who you are attracted to or when it chooses to find a person attractive. I realised that being in an unhealthy relationship dynamic (whatever you wanna call it) is actually a way bigger fitnah than being single.
Listening to these couples talking about all these things make me really really wonder if marriage is worth it? There seem to be way to many compromises and complications and stress compared to the happiness that comes with it.
@zahra saani That may be the case for some but not all. For me, I come from a family that is not religious but culturally strict, so before I got married even basic things like me going the masjid to attend classes was sometimes seen as 'not caring for my family'. I had so many negative things that people would say e.g. "you need to learnt to cook coz nobody's gonna wana marry you just coz you pray" and things like that. Alhamdulillah I married a man who is religious but not robotic and his entire family are the same. So for me, after I got married, then I was able to do things freely e.g. attending classes and meeting up with friends and going swimming or going to the gym etc. My husband is supportive and encouraging and let's me do what I want. He has no problem that i don't know how to cook or do anything domestic coz in his eyes having a wife who doesn't engage in gossip etc is more valuable. With him, Alhamdulillah I have been able to travel to different countries too, Allaahummaa baarik. He has no problem that I'm not domestic, or that I don't wear makeup etc, and he admires and respects that I am strong when it comes to my principles. He tells me to ignore the people who think I'm rude. He always tells me the way I am is just perfect for him. We were colleagues and what stood out for him is when I went against the Management in the company, lol. This is what made him take notice. I have not changed who I am, I have not compromised anything. I have been married about 2.5 years and Alhamdulillah he is still the supportive man I married at the beginning who doesn't keep me locked up in the house or stuck to his hip. He is the person who is my partner who has become my safe space to be vulnerable, who likes me challenging his views, and who is my rock, Allaahummaa baarik. Oops - didn't realise this would become an essay 🤭
@zahra saani I have spent most of my life feeling rejected. I'm not pretty enough, not light skinned, too headstrong, not domestic, too loud, too short, can't speak native language etc. I always pictured marriage as a compromise and something I'd do just coz I have to, and even if I marry someone of my own choice it still would be unhappy marriage somehow. But Alhamdulillah, my husband loves my 'flaws', same with my in-laws. I don't get any grief nor do they expect anything from me. The only compromise we have both had to do was decorating the bedroom (I love pink and floral things, lol), and regarding finances, Alhamdulillah we both agreed we didn't want to be in debt in order to get married so we never took out huge loan, the dowry was what he could afford, and we don't buy things on finance. The only hardship I had was towards the beginning where I found "being spoilt" wasn't happening but I didn't complain coz that was coz we had to look after own money since we didn't have loans and just got married etc and had other expenses e.g. car and home etc. This hardship was coz I had romantic views instead of real views. He still treated me and surprised me of course but not to the extent I thought he would. Anyway, now our finances are better and we're stronger. He also notices little things about me and encourages me to to share with the world. Alhamdulillah we have never had a moment where we hated each other. We have always gone to bed resolving our problems. It's hard to change your life from thinking about yourself to thinking about both of you, but for me, Alhamdulillah it's a minor thing. Allaahummaa baarik, I feel blessed. Don't get discouraged from getting married when YOU are ready with the RIGHT person, Alhamdulillah it is worth it having someone who truly cares for you and wants to make you shine
@zahra saani Jazakillaahu Khairan. Btw, I got married over age of 30 where people are more set in their ways, and Alhamdulillah it has been fine. Make dua for a blessed marriage and someone who accepts you for you, and in shaa Allah you'll be fine
@zahra saani I wasn't pressured to get married. I think more than anything people felt sorry for me for being single at that age and that's what bothered me. It was difficult having people like my cv and then rejecting me when they see my photo, but my single life wasn't spent "I need to get married!", my single life was spent enjoying and learning things about myself and trying things. This had limits so when I got married Alhamdulillah I didn't have limits coz my husband always encourages me to do more of what I love. People probably thought "oh she married someone who settled for her" but the truth is, marriage talks had come for us for each other and he always agreed and I always said no coz I didn't wana deal with rejection from someone who people say is 'perfect' for me. Anyway, turns out we were colleagues! Bengali people have official names and then family names so we only knew each other at work by our official names yet families would talk to us about each other using our family names. Anyway, he was interested in me for marriage at work and then found out I was the girl his family had told him about, so now he also knew how I was outside of work which made him even more interested. Anyway! We had been colleagues for about 2 years so when we realised who each other were and actually discussed marriage, it was what we agreed with each other. He loved me but I didn't love him til several months after marriage and Alhamdulillah he was fine with this and patient. People kept saying to me "you need to get married, you're getting old, religious guys get married at a young age!" But I always said Allah Knows when the time is right. Alhamdulillah we both got married to the type of people we wanted - we wanted someone strong and principled, and I wanted someone religious yet fun and sociable and who will accept me wholeheartedly, and Alhamdulillah I have this. Allaahummaa baarik. Hard part of getting married is trying to ignore people's comments and judgements and just putting trust in Allah.
When Sid said "how do you know he's not feeling the same way?" I hit LIKE :D This is the Sid and Dina I like... none of the flashy collab stuff, in music videos etc. I like the real normal stuff xx
In this day of age it's pretty normal and expected. With all the unrealistic looking relationships and people being shown in society nowadays, we lose track of reality. Self reflection is important🙆♀️
Sid has the best facial expressions in the world. Even better than the ones I make which my mother tells me off for and I am a very expressive, straight up person. Believe me.
I have been rewatching old Sid & Dina videos and I thought this was an old video until I realized it was released like 2 days ago. I’m so glad you’re doing the couch advise videos again.
@@NK-eb1qh loool! My days are sooo offf. Don’t blame me though because I live in the US and the election has occupied my mind😭😭 The funny thing is the way I calculated this is because i for some stupid reason thought Tuesday, Election Day, was Nov. 5th. Hence, the election fiasco has officially claimed my brain as its home.
After 17 years and two teens in the house, I can tell you quantity is hard to get in but quality is so much better now than it ever was. As you grow more comfortable with your spouse and yourself, all insecurities go out the window. Keep working on it. You won't regret it :)
Another point that wasn't touched on is "unrealistic expectations". As the girl said she has limited sexual experience so maybe she's deriving unrealistic expectations from movies and her imagination. Maybe she has seen some over-acted orgasms and she wants the same. It might be helpful to go to a sex therapist and she can help her get in touch with her real feminine energy and bust a few myths. OR they can both go to a therapist together and rekindle the fire by talking about it.
@@ayeshaali1392 totally. But its not a bad thing to want boring sex. It's also not bad wanting to be creative. Both are fine. But if two partners are not on the same page, a specialist can help them come to a common ground. Or gently nudge them to communicate about their needs in a loving manner.
she should not be watching porn or any movies that have suggestive pornographic scenes? if she is indulging in such things, she needs to lower her gaze, and fast.
To be honest this is very very very normal. I have had the same question for myself for a while so thanks for picking this topic out. It is not talked about enough. I think it also depends on your surroundings. I am attracted to my husband but sometimes things have a habit of falling into routine and that is a big turn off for me. Also I find that Sid is right about the buzzy buzzy in dating phase. It's the ultimate conception of having the forbidden then after you are married, you don't really have that forbidden element left anymore. Someone below has commented that she may not be 'finishing' - it could be that but it could also be that she is finishing but it's just boring routine. I find that to be the case often. I also think that if you live with in-laws or other people then you have that certain degree of 'forbiddeness' however if you only live with your partner and kids then you are always in each other's way and seeing each other most days so there is never that 'I miss you' phase which in turn would give a better buzzy feeling.
Don't think living with in laws is tbe solution 🤣 If anything it's off putting bec you have a huge lack of privacy (totally unislamic also). They won't be "in eachother's way" 24/7 if they have jobs, hobbies, commitments etc
I love the way u guys are so candid and realistic abt what it's really like& how to work through things coz a lot of the info out there about love& intimacy is so unrealistic& they try to make ppl feel bad by saying real love is being in love& attracted everyday to the same person and if u don't feel this way then ur love isn't as authentic
When Dina talked about being busy and then being slapped on the ass was so relatable 🤣. Hubby and me have been together for 14 years and have a one year old and a baby on the way and he still pulls that every time. Made me laugh so hard, cuz it really is annoying 😂!!! Boys will be boys I guess.
This is a really funny video, I don’t know why I cracked up so much. Why is sex so awkward to talk about, we’re all adults. It’s even more funny hearing you two being awkward about it. Oh my days I’m watching this again - Sid killed me at the end 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
She had never had sex with anyone else.. she had expectations. She got married and how she imagined her sex life to be wasnt how it turn3d out thats why she is having fantasies.. why not herself put effort its just nt the guy to work on it.. how sex is in the movies or whteva it doenst alway be in reality.. she shoudl stop dreaming and get back to reality and work on it.. maybe if she puts in the work he will see and it would make him too.. it comes both ways not one sided.
I agree, most people go into marriages with expectations thats are not realistic, marriage is no bollywood movie or 50 shades of grey sex its sumthing u have to work on, compromise, adapt and better it constantly, that's up to u and ur partner communicating and supporting one another
Many couples have great sex lives, for the ones who dont, they are not on the same level either natural imbalance of hormones or just not attracted to each other, or they be looking outside of marriage and the one they have wont be attractive anymore.
Yes, and it's a scientific fact. Especially with a 6 month old. The most important thing she has to do right now is realize she's not her regular self. So she has to cope with it, whether it's with a psychologist or a family member or a friend, maybe even her husband(without belittling him in any way). Marriage is work.
Hey Sid totally fine to not enjoy playing with the kids. I'm a mum and yes I play with my kids for the sake of their joy but certainly not for my joy :D and I don't feel guilty for my lack of enthusiasm, that's just my character and it's ok. As long as i love my kids and treat them with respect i don't think there's a problem. Me being a passive player my kids like to tell me what to do and how to play. I think it's actually better for them to be in charge and for me to (boredly) play along, as they should be master of their universe.
“ It ain’t going down that week” 😂😂😂. You guys are aaccttivve for me and my partner its “It ain’t going down this month”. Love you guys keep up the vids always a good laugh
What sid said about not enjoying playing with kids but knowing it means a lot to them and dina, I love that and I think my husband might be the same, you made me realise
Sometimes we compare the ‘buzz’ unknowingly to disney love stories and hollywood and bollywood- Or even that ‘crush’ stage when young. Its all fantasy Not saying in a marriage there cant be a buzz - but its defo not like how hollywood shows Its a more deep real love Without the background sound tracks and effects
Women honestly cater to everyone but themselves and are expected to fulfill their husbands desires even though he has not taken into account any of the struggles she is going through. sex is only an act of love or lust not a chore. Men that want to have sex with their wives even when she isn’t in the mood are creeps and don’t care about her.
My partner and I have been together for almost 12 years now and the fire is still burning. Some would maybe say that it can never be like the very first day you meet - but I would say it´s even better since we know each other and know what the other person likes. Not only sexually but in general. It´s sad for me to hear that such a young woman doesn`t enjoy her sex life when this part of a relationship is as important as verbal affirmations (I love you...., praise etc). Maybe she went into this marriage prioritizing other aspects of a partnership which would be fine. But now she finds herself phantasizing about other men. I believe there are only two roads down there from here: either she talks to her husband and together they try to figure out how they can be better for each other (because he might feel the same way without her know it). If such an attempt fails, she miight maybe want to move on from this relationship. Sex is certainly not the most important thing in the world but it´s also not the least important one. And the young lady´s words touched me because I had a feeling that she really wants love and desire and that there hasn´t been any room for it right now. However, I wish the couple the best of luck and I sincerely hope that they will figure it out. Cheers
Sadly it's a lot more complicated with a child now involved. Let's say hypothetically she can't get that fire burning again and tries a year of therapy with her husband. Then what? Divorce, become a single mum and have very low chances of getting remarrid to someone she is actually attracted to, considering the stigma of marrying divorcees/mothers in the brown community. It really depends how important a fulfilling sex life is to her
Dina talks as if all women are like her, and sid talks as if all women are like Dina, not all of us act like that or hate affection like that. Idm affection any time of the day regardless if I'm doing dishes or changing nappies I appreciate it, I love it and I always want more of it. And I know that's personal and everyone's different that's why it's wrong to generalise. Some women even want it even more than their husbands
Exactly this! They need to stop generalising in all their advice videos, I know they can only know their own experiences and stuff but think about the other possibilities too, instead of giving one piece of advice for the whole video
It's an advise video they have to speak from their own experience that's how it works if you are expecting something else from them watch something else mate
@@iqrazab3625 it is exactly because it is an advise video that they shouldn't generalise. Dina talking about not being bothered doesn't relate to the woman, cos the woman is telling them she wants it just not with this person. Her issue is not not feeling it. When they generalise and assume all women are too tired and not bothered and need to be in the mood that's not helpful in an advise video where for many people that's not the case. Look im not hating I just don't think its correct to generalise like that
@@ghadeera1642 you clearly look so bothered by it just watch it for the entertainment and MOVE ON it ain't that serious. They are not required to put a disclaimer everytime that ohhh we are not generallizing. They have said in their videos before that they speak from their OWN experience. You don't understand the meaning of advice they share their opinion and they can't talk about everyones POV bcz the video will be hrs long! you don't like the advice just don't watch it PERIODTTT.
@@iqrazab3625 why u so bothered by me? Lmaooo they are generalising. Im entertained and love them as a couple, and I am also allowed to have an opinion. Thanks
Im so happy you're back with these vids, I love watching you both somehow you give me hope in healthy marriages you both have a very beautiful relationship 💜
I think it’s all about communication and understanding each other, life is so busy with kids work house bills etc that sometimes the focus is lost and when you stop communicating and think the other one should already know then it makes things so much harder. Me and my hubby once a month have date night at home the full world candles dinenr flowers choc we get dressed up and enjoy our one two hours not talking about every day stuff just enjoying each other’s company and it’s very important point what Dina said about talking with one another it should be mutual and just feel right not because your acting it out. Build the communication and always know that you can talk freely to him and vice versa without being judged or spoken back at negatively. Marraige is a beautiful thing but you have to be patient and work at it each day one step at a time. I hope for the best for you
I see what you did there Dina 🤣🤣🤣🤣”I find it attractive when you clean the house”
😂😂😂😂 “so hot when you clean and do the dishes”
I feel like women or men should look at the opposite gender when there married because it causes problems like this
I remember watching the show The Real. Tamera also says she is attracted to her husband when he does chores. I think many woman do apparently. 😂🤷♀️
Honestly, I find it really sexy too when a man does the dishes 🤤
fix the audio sid and dina! pleaaase my ears
In a nutshell, if you leave every family chore and household job to your wife, and then expect sex at the end of the day, she will resent you for it. A marriage is about balance, respect and partnership
@will de
why do you feel entitled to give your opinion when no one asked...?
Sex is two way street lady
Biggest bullshit I’ve ever heard. Sex is non transactional. Do u find a ‘hot’ guy attractive cuz he cooks and cleans for you? NO. You find him attractive cuz he’s Hot & acts like a man. Men don’t listen to women. You don’t ask a fish in how to fish. You ask the fisherman. Women are easy to work out. Be Hot, be A man, be in shape, be sexually Attractive & make her orgasm. Simple. Don’t over complicate this shit.
TMZ 142 what are you even saying?? some people find acts of service attractive and that’s okay. what does it even mean to act like a man?
fai ali what does it mean to act like a man? The same thing it meant since the dawn of time which is a minimum of 4 millions years. Take you’re ‘Woke’ modern day Social programming somewhere else. What does it mean to be a man god 🤦♂️
Anyone remember the affair with the imam video😂😂😂
That was so funny
Sum Umar I love their videos so much
LOLLL yeah 🤣
Was that the 1 where they would do it in a prayer rooom ?
AdamLdn who tf knows 🤣🤣🤣😂
I love that the topics they discuss are REAL life issues that people confront!
Been married 12 years and I can tell you, you have to work hard to keep that spark lit! It's not an easy job!!!
What do you exactly mean by “work hard” what kind of things do you have to do to keep it
P.s I’m not married yet but scared to lose that spark too along the way and I ask myself sometimes
@@rukiawarsame4794 communicate talk about your desires etc
@@rukiawarsame4794 I think she means you have to make an effort in marriages because it can get boring if that makes sense. You have to do things to keep marriage exciting and fresh. Like whether it's dressing up, going out for dinner dates, romantic getaways, or just doing things in the bedroom a bit differently it just depends on what your partner likes and the effort has always has to be mutual!! You don't have to go out your way but as I said it's an individual preference after a few years into marriage you'll see what I mean but at the moment don't stress if you're single. You learn as you go along the way. Enjoy the single life x
Yes I think she means make sacrifices and make time with each other
@@saraleena007 thats exactly what I mean
Every man watching this who has been married for 4 and a 1/2 years with a 6 month old:
👁👄👁
loooooool
🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sid is so uncomfortable with this topic. It’s fun to watch him squirm. 😂
Honeymoon phases go out the window. However, talking to your husband about these feelings is absolutely fine and halal. No shame when it comes to bedroom activities. There is no need to feel despair. This is normal. Absolutely. My husband is in heart medications and his libido is out the window. He knows that, feels bad and guilty. But there are other adult ways to be intimate. I am patient too. Its all about patience and communication.
@boimackhead true, I hope she doesn't hurt his feelings. She can approach him in a kind manner.
@boimackhead maybe its sad but at least she will try to change some stuff and the husband needs to say what he wants her to be like ..can buy her the type of clothes he likes on her.. talk more ..then they can find the spark again ..better thinking everything is fime when its not .. n it may get worse with time! Dont u think?
The grass is not greener on the other side, if you’ve got a good man, count yourself lucky. 💛
Thanks for all the likes! 😃
@@StikManJones I totally agree with you! The spark comes and goes and it takes a lot more than that to keep a relationship going.
Same with a woman.
I appreciate Sid's honesty. Great advice.
My worst fear lmaooo what if my husbands just like nah I’m not feeling u anymore 😭 😭 😂 falls out of love or smth
I love how open and honest you both are! Especially as sex isn’t a topic that is widely discussed with in the Muslim community so there isnt many people you can approach for advice. I’m so glad that you guys are making these advice videos again, keep doing what you are doing. Lots of luv
Right after giving birth and throughout my pumping journey I absolutely had no desire to have sexual relationships with my partner. It could definitely be the hormonal changes and just being tired. These feelings are normal. Give yourself time. It does get better in my opinion.
Isnt that different? This girl does have sexual desires, for other men though, not him.
She has fantasies and desire about other men, but isn't sexually attracted to her hhsband
nothing exictes me more than seeing sid and dina on my youtube recommendations
and I oop-
@ 🤣🤣🤣
They're such a handsome couple
"Get some pots and pans out" LMAOOOO I'm done I can't breathe I adore you guys
😂😂😂😂
“I don’t know but I was on a roll there” I freakin love Dina 😂
Sid is spot on with this! You can educate many men who dont get this simple fact of how women’s brains are so different when it comes to intimacy. And Dinas comments about sex as a chore if the man isn’t helping is sooooo true.
Only seven minutes in and I have already smiled more thani have smiled in days. Love you guys. The honesty and the truth bombs. Keep them coming.
'if am a pig, it ain't just happening that week' watching this was gold couldn't stop cracking
Dina your face when Sid is saying 'y'know for a woman it's pretty simple to persuade a man to change' 🤣🤣🤣
Sid: "put a beard on that!"
Read this as Sid said it😂
What if he can't grow a beard
it's great advice but the problem is the woman in the e-mail probably married this guy without feeling physically attracted to him. She prioritized other aspects over appearance and that's completely fine. But that's what you get when you do this and she should accept it how it is. I don't think it's healthy to imagine other ppl during sex. It means you're not turned on by them at alll
Well she can't control thinking about others. It just happens.
Yes you are right she married him because he was a nice guy but she isn't attracted to him 😬 I completely understand where she is coming from but even in Islam it says it's very very important to be attracted to your spouse now we know why that is because otherwise you will imagine yourself with others 😐
Yep and I think this is the issue they missed in the video. The woman in the email was highlighting that she doesn’t feel a strong physical/sexual attraction to her husband and you can’t force attraction.. it’s either there or it’s not. Physical attraction is the basis for building a healthy sexual relationship. I don’t think the woman felt this from the get go! But some more information would of been helpful for Sid & Dina.
@@targaryenblood well this person is not chastising her for having these thoughts.. merely highlighting the problem.
@@lailahkhan2683 This is 100% true. I dont even look at guys in that way, but what happened to me was strange. I was speaking to this guy I wasn't attracted to (in the hopes the attraction would somehow kick-in.. it didn't) and as time wore on, I found myself randomly checking out guys whenever I was out. It wasn't even intentional, it's something my mind would automatically do and I had to force myself to stop it.
When the talks ended with that guy, I went back to my usual self and didn't check out guys anymore. It was very very strange thing indeed. Your mind simply cannot help who you are attracted to or when it chooses to find a person attractive.
I realised that being in an unhealthy relationship dynamic (whatever you wanna call it) is actually a way bigger fitnah than being single.
“He might not have a beard. Tell him to grown a beard. Put a beard on that” 😂😂😂
Omg I never knew these videos were back, I haven’t watched since 2017!! Dina looks so beautiful mashallah!
I can't deal with sids face expressions when Dina was reading out the email 😂😂😂
DINAAA YOU LOOK SO PRETTY like this dark hair and fake tan is a stunning look on youuu
Listening to these couples talking about all these things make me really really wonder if marriage is worth it? There seem to be way to many compromises and complications and stress compared to the happiness that comes with it.
Alhamdulillah worth it with the right person.
@zahra saani
That may be the case for some but not all. For me, I come from a family that is not religious but culturally strict, so before I got married even basic things like me going the masjid to attend classes was sometimes seen as 'not caring for my family'. I had so many negative things that people would say e.g. "you need to learnt to cook coz nobody's gonna wana marry you just coz you pray" and things like that. Alhamdulillah I married a man who is religious but not robotic and his entire family are the same. So for me, after I got married, then I was able to do things freely e.g. attending classes and meeting up with friends and going swimming or going to the gym etc. My husband is supportive and encouraging and let's me do what I want. He has no problem that i don't know how to cook or do anything domestic coz in his eyes having a wife who doesn't engage in gossip etc is more valuable. With him, Alhamdulillah I have been able to travel to different countries too, Allaahummaa baarik. He has no problem that I'm not domestic, or that I don't wear makeup etc, and he admires and respects that I am strong when it comes to my principles. He tells me to ignore the people who think I'm rude. He always tells me the way I am is just perfect for him. We were colleagues and what stood out for him is when I went against the Management in the company, lol. This is what made him take notice. I have not changed who I am, I have not compromised anything. I have been married about 2.5 years and Alhamdulillah he is still the supportive man I married at the beginning who doesn't keep me locked up in the house or stuck to his hip. He is the person who is my partner who has become my safe space to be vulnerable, who likes me challenging his views, and who is my rock, Allaahummaa baarik. Oops - didn't realise this would become an essay 🤭
@zahra saani I have spent most of my life feeling rejected. I'm not pretty enough, not light skinned, too headstrong, not domestic, too loud, too short, can't speak native language etc. I always pictured marriage as a compromise and something I'd do just coz I have to, and even if I marry someone of my own choice it still would be unhappy marriage somehow. But Alhamdulillah, my husband loves my 'flaws', same with my in-laws. I don't get any grief nor do they expect anything from me. The only compromise we have both had to do was decorating the bedroom (I love pink and floral things, lol), and regarding finances, Alhamdulillah we both agreed we didn't want to be in debt in order to get married so we never took out huge loan, the dowry was what he could afford, and we don't buy things on finance. The only hardship I had was towards the beginning where I found "being spoilt" wasn't happening but I didn't complain coz that was coz we had to look after own money since we didn't have loans and just got married etc and had other expenses e.g. car and home etc. This hardship was coz I had romantic views instead of real views. He still treated me and surprised me of course but not to the extent I thought he would. Anyway, now our finances are better and we're stronger. He also notices little things about me and encourages me to to share with the world. Alhamdulillah we have never had a moment where we hated each other. We have always gone to bed resolving our problems. It's hard to change your life from thinking about yourself to thinking about both of you, but for me, Alhamdulillah it's a minor thing. Allaahummaa baarik, I feel blessed. Don't get discouraged from getting married when YOU are ready with the RIGHT person, Alhamdulillah it is worth it having someone who truly cares for you and wants to make you shine
@zahra saani Jazakillaahu Khairan. Btw, I got married over age of 30 where people are more set in their ways, and Alhamdulillah it has been fine. Make dua for a blessed marriage and someone who accepts you for you, and in shaa Allah you'll be fine
@zahra saani I wasn't pressured to get married. I think more than anything people felt sorry for me for being single at that age and that's what bothered me. It was difficult having people like my cv and then rejecting me when they see my photo, but my single life wasn't spent "I need to get married!", my single life was spent enjoying and learning things about myself and trying things. This had limits so when I got married Alhamdulillah I didn't have limits coz my husband always encourages me to do more of what I love. People probably thought "oh she married someone who settled for her" but the truth is, marriage talks had come for us for each other and he always agreed and I always said no coz I didn't wana deal with rejection from someone who people say is 'perfect' for me. Anyway, turns out we were colleagues! Bengali people have official names and then family names so we only knew each other at work by our official names yet families would talk to us about each other using our family names. Anyway, he was interested in me for marriage at work and then found out I was the girl his family had told him about, so now he also knew how I was outside of work which made him even more interested. Anyway! We had been colleagues for about 2 years so when we realised who each other were and actually discussed marriage, it was what we agreed with each other. He loved me but I didn't love him til several months after marriage and Alhamdulillah he was fine with this and patient. People kept saying to me "you need to get married, you're getting old, religious guys get married at a young age!" But I always said Allah Knows when the time is right. Alhamdulillah we both got married to the type of people we wanted - we wanted someone strong and principled, and I wanted someone religious yet fun and sociable and who will accept me wholeheartedly, and Alhamdulillah I have this. Allaahummaa baarik. Hard part of getting married is trying to ignore people's comments and judgements and just putting trust in Allah.
I really appreciate your honesty! It's impossible to find honest advice about taboo/difficult topics!
When Sid said "how do you know he's not feeling the same way?" I hit LIKE :D This is the Sid and Dina I like... none of the flashy collab stuff, in music videos etc. I like the real normal stuff xx
Things not going down if I don’t clean or play with the kids loool
Lmaoo
@@opaque1231 hhuuhhhhhhuh
@@opaque1231 huh
@@opaque1231 hhh
@@opaque1231 h
"Are we talking from experience, little fuckah" I DROPPED 😂
🤣🤣
Kinda sad that there’s so many marriage problems going on 🥺😫
It’s normal tho lol
This issue is normal.
it's hardly many, you see like 4 stories out of millions of people who are married lol
In this day of age it's pretty normal and expected. With all the unrealistic looking relationships and people being shown in society nowadays, we lose track of reality. Self reflection is important🙆♀️
@@maysal2801 the divorce rates have never been higher sadly. The statistics are depressing
Sid has the best facial expressions in the world. Even better than the ones I make which my mother tells me off for and I am a very expressive, straight up person. Believe me.
lmaoo this video was so uncomfy yet hilarious, sid's expressions are everything!!
Haha Dina with her role play😂
How are people so serious in playing role plays in bed? 😂 I would feel so awkward
Sid looks like he would rather be putting this doors on then listen to this letter 🤣
I have been rewatching old Sid & Dina videos and I thought this was an old video until I realized it was released like 2 days ago. I’m so glad you’re doing the couch advise videos again.
This is from 2 hours ago! 😂
@@NK-eb1qh loool! My days are sooo offf. Don’t blame me though because I live in the US and the election has occupied my mind😭😭
The funny thing is the way I calculated this is because i for some stupid reason thought Tuesday, Election Day, was Nov. 5th. Hence, the election fiasco has officially claimed my brain as its home.
Sid mate you're good at answering these tings 👍🏽
I can’t tell you how happy I am that you’re making these videos again
Sid's facial expressions were literally to die for!
After 17 years and two teens in the house, I can tell you quantity is hard to get in but quality is so much better now than it ever was. As you grow more comfortable with your spouse and yourself, all insecurities go out the window. Keep working on it. You won't regret it :)
"YOU WERE THERE BRO, SHE WAS NOT EVEN IN THE VICINITY" im dedddddd
Another point that wasn't touched on is "unrealistic expectations". As the girl said she has limited sexual experience so maybe she's deriving unrealistic expectations from movies and her imagination. Maybe she has seen some over-acted orgasms and she wants the same. It might be helpful to go to a sex therapist and she can help her get in touch with her real feminine energy and bust a few myths. OR they can both go to a therapist together and rekindle the fire by talking about it.
Thats a really good point
Or maybe she wants a bit of fun and he's only giving her boring vanilla? Maybe hes the one who needs to get some help
@@ayeshaali1392 totally. But its not a bad thing to want boring sex. It's also not bad wanting to be creative. Both are fine. But if two partners are not on the same page, a specialist can help them come to a common ground. Or gently nudge them to communicate about their needs in a loving manner.
she should not be watching porn or any movies that have suggestive pornographic scenes? if she is indulging in such things, she needs to lower her gaze, and fast.
@@ayeshaali1392 she needs the help, her perverted activities prior to marriage is what has lead her to where she is now.
I love that you guys keep it 100% real with eachother.
They should spice up their bedroom action and try role playing if nothing helps just put a paper bag on his/her head then do your thing lmao
lmfao💀💀💀
@@kkeot 🤣🤣🤣🤷♂️
I'm dying right now 😝
wtffff yooo1🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂
4:42 I cried at Sid LMAOOOOO why is he like that 😭😂😂😂
I honestly love how honest you guys are
So glad you're posting regularly 💜
Reminds me of modern family when Phil and Claire do role play every valentines.
I love how embarrased sid is in this episode 😂
To be honest this is very very very normal. I have had the same question for myself for a while so thanks for picking this topic out. It is not talked about enough. I think it also depends on your surroundings. I am attracted to my husband but sometimes things have a habit of falling into routine and that is a big turn off for me. Also I find that Sid is right about the buzzy buzzy in dating phase. It's the ultimate conception of having the forbidden then after you are married, you don't really have that forbidden element left anymore.
Someone below has commented that she may not be 'finishing' - it could be that but it could also be that she is finishing but it's just boring routine. I find that to be the case often.
I also think that if you live with in-laws or other people then you have that certain degree of 'forbiddeness' however if you only live with your partner and kids then you are always in each other's way and seeing each other most days so there is never that 'I miss you' phase which in turn would give a better buzzy feeling.
Don't think living with in laws is tbe solution 🤣 If anything it's off putting bec you have a huge lack of privacy (totally unislamic also). They won't be "in eachother's way" 24/7 if they have jobs, hobbies, commitments etc
I guess Dina doesn't like being slapped, she nearly turned into Hulk 😂
I love the way u guys are so candid and realistic abt what it's really like& how to work through things coz a lot of the info out there about love& intimacy is so unrealistic& they try to make ppl feel bad by saying real love is being in love& attracted everyday to the same person and if u don't feel this way then ur love isn't as authentic
I love you guys so much. I actually relate to this and have picked up so many things. And you guys banter is unreal. Thank you xxx
Dina and Sid's advice was soooo good! This is an issue that is not discussed at all.
SID IS HILARIOUS I’m dying 😂
Sid's facial reaction while Dina reads the email ...is everything
When Dina talked about being busy and then being slapped on the ass was so relatable 🤣. Hubby and me have been together for 14 years and have a one year old and a baby on the way and he still pulls that every time. Made me laugh so hard, cuz it really is annoying 😂!!! Boys will be boys I guess.
Dina you’re skin has changed sooooo much. Can you please do a skin care video please?
After the whole 17.5 minute deep advice with suggestions etc, Dina’s like scrap that, do roleplay 😂😂😂 ly
Sid and his expressions lol
Sids facial expressions whilst Dina was reading the email is mood lmao 😂
This is a really funny video, I don’t know why I cracked up so much. Why is sex so awkward to talk about, we’re all adults. It’s even more funny hearing you two being awkward about it. Oh my days I’m watching this again - Sid killed me at the end 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
She had never had sex with anyone else.. she had expectations. She got married and how she imagined her sex life to be wasnt how it turn3d out thats why she is having fantasies.. why not herself put effort its just nt the guy to work on it.. how sex is in the movies or whteva it doenst alway be in reality.. she shoudl stop dreaming and get back to reality and work on it.. maybe if she puts in the work he will see and it would make him too.. it comes both ways not one sided.
Maybe he's just not good in bed and could be quite selfish bang bang thank you ma'am 😫
I agree, most people go into marriages with expectations thats are not realistic, marriage is no bollywood movie or 50 shades of grey sex its sumthing u have to work on, compromise, adapt and better it constantly, that's up to u and ur partner communicating and supporting one another
Many couples have great sex lives, for the ones who dont, they are not on the same level either natural imbalance of hormones or just not attracted to each other, or they be looking outside of marriage and the one they have wont be attractive anymore.
Or maybe she’s just not physically attracted. It would be hard to put in effort if your physically find someone ugly
@@flabbytobaddie she had a love marriage she was physically attracted to him its just after its fizzled out
I found this one hilarious! 😂😂😂😂 sid made it too funny hahahhaha Dina gave some good advice there though, especially about not making sex a chore 💯
When women have kids hormones change🤗
But her hormones aren't the issue, she has sexual desires, just not for her husband 🤷🏻♀️. People are really missing the point.
Richie V yea true. She stated she still feels attraction just not to him
Yes, and it's a scientific fact. Especially with a 6 month old. The most important thing she has to do right now is realize she's not her regular self. So she has to cope with it, whether it's with a psychologist or a family member or a friend, maybe even her husband(without belittling him in any way). Marriage is work.
@@farimb2380 but she literally said she has a sex drive and finds other men attractive!!! Except her husband.
You guys give such a great advice. I appreciate yall for taking the time.
You two are hilarious with buzzing lol and Sid expressions 🤣😂
Dina you got me in stitches @6mins🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Yesssss it feels like a chore exactly!! SIDS face is all confused like wtf bro does she think of it that way loooool
dina is insanely beautiful, i just cant stop looking at her danm
Sid’s expression at 13:21 😭🤣
Did Sid turn into Batman? 🤣 he was so obsessed with that character 🤣
Sid trying to suppress a laugh/smile when Dina started reading the question lol
Hey Sid totally fine to not enjoy playing with the kids. I'm a mum and yes I play with my kids for the sake of their joy but certainly not for my joy :D and I don't feel guilty for my lack of enthusiasm, that's just my character and it's ok. As long as i love my kids and treat them with respect i don't think there's a problem. Me being a passive player my kids like to tell me what to do and how to play. I think it's actually better for them to be in charge and for me to (boredly) play along, as they should be master of their universe.
“ It ain’t going down that week” 😂😂😂. You guys are aaccttivve for me and my partner its “It ain’t going down this month”. Love you guys keep up the vids always a good laugh
@ 😂😂 I really Cba so I just dodge the guy when I know its coming 😬
What sid said about not enjoying playing with kids but knowing it means a lot to them and dina, I love that and I think my husband might be the same, you made me realise
Sometimes we compare the ‘buzz’ unknowingly to disney love stories and hollywood and bollywood-
Or even that ‘crush’ stage when young.
Its all fantasy
Not saying in a marriage there cant be a buzz - but its defo not like how hollywood shows
Its a more deep real love
Without the background sound tracks and effects
Yay glad to see you guys back on the couch, didn’t like the whole podcast with the mic setting
Where is your hoodie from Dina?
"I've seen it on TikTok" 😂😂😂😂😂
Ti amo Dina ❤️
Women honestly cater to everyone but themselves and are expected to fulfill their husbands desires even though he has not taken into account any of the struggles she is going through. sex is only an act of love or lust not a chore. Men that want to have sex with their wives even when she isn’t in the mood are creeps and don’t care about her.
Love how real and genuine u are. So funny xx
Sid. Ur freakin smart!! I wish my husband would get on board and smarten up hahah
15:45 is my mood since the day I was born. 😂
Omg, yes same!!.. my husband looks 😍 when he's cleaning/tiding the house loll
My partner and I have been together for almost 12 years now and the fire is still burning. Some would maybe say that it can never be like the very first day you meet - but I would say it´s even better since we know each other and know what the other person likes. Not only sexually but in general.
It´s sad for me to hear that such a young woman doesn`t enjoy her sex life when this part of a relationship is as important as verbal affirmations (I love you...., praise etc). Maybe she went into this marriage prioritizing other aspects of a partnership which would be fine. But now she finds herself phantasizing about other men. I believe there are only two roads down there from here: either she talks to her husband and together they try to figure out how they can be better for each other (because he might feel the same way without her know it). If such an attempt fails, she miight maybe want to move on from this relationship.
Sex is certainly not the most important thing in the world but it´s also not the least important one. And the young lady´s words touched me because I had a feeling that she really wants love and desire and that there hasn´t been any room for it right now.
However, I wish the couple the best of luck and I sincerely hope that they will figure it out. Cheers
Sadly it's a lot more complicated with a child now involved. Let's say hypothetically she can't get that fire burning again and tries a year of therapy with her husband. Then what? Divorce, become a single mum and have very low chances of getting remarrid to someone she is actually attracted to, considering the stigma of marrying divorcees/mothers in the brown community. It really depends how important a fulfilling sex life is to her
Dina talks as if all women are like her, and sid talks as if all women are like Dina, not all of us act like that or hate affection like that. Idm affection any time of the day regardless if I'm doing dishes or changing nappies I appreciate it, I love it and I always want more of it. And I know that's personal and everyone's different that's why it's wrong to generalise. Some women even want it even more than their husbands
Exactly this! They need to stop generalising in all their advice videos, I know they can only know their own experiences and stuff but think about the other possibilities too, instead of giving one piece of advice for the whole video
It's an advise video they have to speak from their own experience that's how it works if you are expecting something else from them watch something else mate
@@iqrazab3625 it is exactly because it is an advise video that they shouldn't generalise. Dina talking about not being bothered doesn't relate to the woman, cos the woman is telling them she wants it just not with this person. Her issue is not not feeling it. When they generalise and assume all women are too tired and not bothered and need to be in the mood that's not helpful in an advise video where for many people that's not the case. Look im not hating I just don't think its correct to generalise like that
@@ghadeera1642 you clearly look so bothered by it just watch it for the entertainment and MOVE ON it ain't that serious. They are not required to put a disclaimer everytime that ohhh we are not generallizing. They have said in their videos before that they speak from their OWN experience. You don't understand the meaning of advice they share their opinion and they can't talk about everyones POV bcz the video will be hrs long! you don't like the advice just don't watch it PERIODTTT.
@@iqrazab3625 why u so bothered by me? Lmaooo they are generalising. Im entertained and love them as a couple, and I am also allowed to have an opinion. Thanks
Love your honesty ! First time I watch one of your videos, it just made me wanna subscribe !
🤣🤣🤣 Sid's little hand 'bookmark' 🤌 🤣🤣🤣 Just reserving a spot to get in a few words bless him.
"Are you talking from experience, little fucker" .......that part killed me 😂😂
omg i used to love these videos! honestly these were/are amazing! Soooo glad yous are back 😭😂
Sid’s face when Dina was reading the question 🤣🤣🤣
10:29 🤣🤣 “and they’re like wuhh”
LmFAOOOOOOOOOO 6:25 thats dinas solution- PLS I’m dying- 😂
Sid’s reaction though loool
What does she mean by role play all I imagine is naughty latex outfits 😭😭
You guys are the most real Muslim couple, not even just Muslim MOST REAL COUPLE!!!!!!!! LOVE U BOTH ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Im so happy you're back with these vids, I love watching you both somehow you give me hope in healthy marriages you both have a very beautiful relationship 💜
I am so bored in quarantine this video made me laugh so much❤🤣
I think it’s all about communication and understanding each other, life is so busy with kids work house bills etc that sometimes the focus is lost and when you stop communicating and think the other one should already know then it makes things so much harder. Me and my hubby once a month have date night at home the full world candles dinenr flowers choc we get dressed up and enjoy our one two hours not talking about every day stuff just enjoying each other’s company and it’s very important point what Dina said about talking with one another it should be mutual and just feel right not because your acting it out. Build the communication and always know that you can talk freely to him and vice versa without being judged or spoken back at negatively. Marraige is a beautiful thing but you have to be patient and work at it each day one step at a time. I hope for the best for you