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This is day 8 not leaving my apartment due to the ice storm in Portland. Cabin fever is real!! I would give anything to see one of my friends or family in person right now.
Yes! I love my life, but seeing friends in person is rare these days. I'm in my mid-thirties and live in the suburbs of a large city with my partner & his daughters. I mostly work from home and have autoimmune conditions & chronic pain that make it difficult to spend extra time in the city to socialize with friends. My plan is to try to make friends in our community in 2024 ✨ Looking forward to watching your video on my lunch break - your channel is relatable and comforting! Have an awesome day, Chelsea 😊
I'm almost there too, with kids early 30s/late 20s. I'm sure that's part of the reason, but also, Chelsea is building her life and I feel like I"m rebuilding mine after raising kids and a divorce. And hey, I still feel young! 😃
it's so interesting the way things have shifted, like it's way more common now for women to be unmarried into their 30s and we're all just trying to find community in new ways. It's pretty cool, there needs to be some way for all of us to find each other!
As a fellow introvert i felt this video to my core lol!! Im also trying to plant my own seeds and establish a friend group after moving to a completely new area, its tough but when its good its so fulfilling. Even when its just a once a month catch up its just nice to have people to confide in!
Yes, agree 100%. When you find people who make the investment to meet up once a month to continue to do life with you - those friends are gold. I think a lot of introverts understand this and are willing to put their energy into friendships with real reciprocity.
A lot of my friendships faded in my 20s, and now, in my 40s, my friendships exist almost solely online. I have one friend in the town where I live (I've known her since childhood, and we just happen to live near each other now), and in the 3 years I've lived here, we've gotten together once. I've never even met her husband and kids. My partner and I have been together for over 25 years, so we're each other's social lives, pretty much. We see my family sometimes, but it's mostly just the two of us all day every day. I love him and I love being with him all the time, but I'm missing that connection with other women that I used to have. ❤️
Your comment is so relatable. I’m 40 in April and I’ve been with my husband since 2001, so like you, my husband is my social life (we get on well so it’s nice to spend time together). As an introvert I do keep myself to myself but I do feel like I miss having other like minded people to socialise with from time to time. Perhaps I should make that my goal this year 😊
I think once you hit 30 it becomes more difficult to find new friends. But when you do post 20’s, you really know the value and know they are so special. I also think that post 30 your friends automatically default to the FaceTime life 😂 and thank God for that technology! I have found that the Marco Polo app has been a life saver in keeping up relationships with my friends from all over. I love catching up in long video messages to one another. There is something to be said about picking up right where you left off without the goodbyes or I’ll see you laters. I cherish those relationships.
this year I moved home to my parents at 33, 6 months of focus and discipline I cleared my credit card debt! Naturally friendships faded when I moved around but since I've been home I realised the people who matter will come to you! And also I was putting myself in debt for people who didn't give back the same energy and I wasted a lot of time! Since I have been home I've had the best non stop social life as I think the people who matter will naturally come to you, the best advice I've been given is "You have to be ok on your own" so I booked solo trips but ended up with friends tagging along (not complaining !) I also pre booked and paid some new fitness classes that were non refundable so I force myself out my comfort zone 🥵 ... you just never know who you could meet! 💜 Also snowing here in the UK 🌨👋xx
Two introverts just volunteering and living their quiet lives: that's how I met my husband of 12 years. I also have a few good friends from that same volunteering gig. It's a no pressure way of getting to know people. And for every person you meet volunteering puts you in touch with their people. Chances are they are like-minded if you're roaming in the same circles.
I'm quite a bit older than you but can really relate to this. It is effortless when you are college age-I didn't have to "work" for friendships; they just automatically happened. I was never deprived of being with other people. I held onto many of those friendships and even though we are still friends after all of these years, I rarely see them. I literally just lost my best friend of almost 40 years on Wednesday. She's really the only person who I did things with. It gets harder, Chelsea...I'm 50 and no one really wants to get together anymore. I gave up on trying a long time ago and just pretty much go with the flow day in and out. All you can do is "sow seeds." It's good that you recognized this now. Because nothing is as disappointing when you put in a lot of effort, and it bears no fruit. Love watching your vlogs; I love how real you are.
I'm so sorry you just lost your best friend... I relate very much to your post here and I'm 47. And you're exactly right - no one wants to get together anymore. No one tries to keep in touch. People just live their lives with those closest to them and real friendship seems to be obsolete. For a long time I was really down in the dumps about not making any new friends, but I also gave up a while ago. My best friend who moved back to Ireland no longer texts me, no Merry Christmas, No Happy New Year... nothing, so I stopped contacting her. It hurts more than I can express, but friendships can not be forced. Thanks for sharing your experiences.
Low Maintenance Friends = High Value Friends. PS Great to see the voluntary work. I do befriending here in Winchester, UK with elderly. One lady, Sue, has become such a firm friend. She's wise, humble and has lived such a colourful, meaningful life. She worked for a charity with trafficked women for years in London. Her wisdom and insight is so valuable. Sadly she's housebound now but has a very very positive outlook. Friendship can happen anywhere. x
@@MandyBarry My closest friends and I really truly believe this. Its just like wearing a comfortable old sweater. It just fits. No drama, no toxicity, just kindness, fun and support for each other. We came up with that saying when saying how lucky we are! :)
I had friends I hanged out with in my 20s. But like you said, things happen and now I don’t even talk to them no more. I’m too focus on my own goals and they are too. If I get new friends, that’s great but I’m not holding my breath about it.
The pandemic really changed a lot of things for people. I'm an extrovert and even I don't see my friends that often anymore which really surprises me. I decided to go back to work just to get out of the house for social interaction. I love it!!
I've recently moved back to an area where I'm able to spend time with a lot of my friends from high school/childhood which has been SO nice but most of them are married with kids or expecting, buying a house, at the top of their careers, etc. So I've been wanting to make new friends/meet more people who are in a more similar "time of life" to myself (30s, single, just really starting a career, etc.). I recently found a local book club that meets up in some cool places in the heart of my city I'm exciting to start attending next month, and I've been looking into local craft stores to join groups and classes there with the hopes of making some new friends too! It's slow going and hella intimidating but I'm excited!
For me I lost connections with friends as I was raising my sons. The hard lesson I have learned that kids grow up and are going to start living their lives and I am alone. It's really hard meeting friends in my 50's. You are really inspiring me.❤
I was born and raised in NYC and, for what it's worth, I am always curious about what brings people here and I love to hear about where they are from, etc. It may be 'small talk,' but I find it interesting. I'm sure other NY'ers do, too, so don't be shy! I had a hard time making friends here, but, once I had kids just a few years ago, it became much easier to make mom friends. I've definitely met quite a few at the playground. haha. It is a bit weird because most of my current friends are transplants, and I'm never sure how long they'll actually stay in NY. At least 5 of them have already moved away in the past 5 years, so that part kind of sucks.
I love how making friends is a high priority for you. As a never married female who's 30's are way behind her, I wish I had made this a big priority in my 30's. Well played friend.
I’m also an introvert who genuinely loves solitude and spending time alone. Sometimes I feel like there is a lot of pressure to be social, when, at least in my opinion, the amount of social interaction one needs varies tremendously. That said, I do think it’s good to plant those seeds and work through how much social interaction you need to creating a fulfilling life. I do that when I find myself retreating too far into my own world.
I have a very similar and opposite experience. I lived in NYC for about 10 years, and I recently had to move back home for family health stuff. I love all of my NYC/Boston/SF friends, but I realized I needed to have at least some casual friends to grab dinner with in my home town. I literally got a job waiting tables on the weekends and joined a semi-pro choir just to find some likeminded people. I now have three or four friends I can call on, and a handful of other friendly acquaintances, in a place I LITERALLY never wanted to be again. Makes it a little bit easier to be away from my chosen family. Making friends is hard, but if you join something you enjoy, you'll inevitably find your people again in the new place.
I have always had a small group of friends. I used to think it was because we moved so much so finding and building long-term friendships in new places was difficult. Then when I got older, I started thinking that I was just different and it was hard to find and maintain a large group of friends. I self-proclaimed myself to be socially awkward. It was easy to be likeable, talk to people, and get to people to want to hang out, yet I often found not wanting to and picking my own company that felt so nice. After a lot of self-discovery throughout 20s and early 30s, ADHD diagnosis in mid 30s a lot of things fell in place and I realized that 1) I just really love being by myself and that is something to treasure since it gives you a stability and strength many cannot imagine, as they are terrified to be in their own company, and 2) it is not a requirement to have a ton of friends. So instead I focused on being a better friend to the small group of close and dear friends I managed to gain over the years. I make more effort to reach out, to make plans and be in their lives. But I also learnt to balance it out and give myself plenty of alone time to allow myself to recharge to be social again. You are definitely not alone in how you seem to look at friendships and connections. Don't feel the pressure to make and maintain lots of friends.
Me too, I definitely can get awkward in social situations. Although that mostly happens in big groups and I’ve never felt comfortable in bigger groups. Aside from this I thought there was something wrong with me, that perhaps I’m very socially awkward but I really think it’s 1) my adhd and 2) I just really like being alone too. When I was in college or when I used to work in an offfice, I always made friends very easily I just had a hard time keeping them but I think it’s mainly because I’m just so comfortable by myself. I’m in my early 30s and I’ve learned to accept it ❤
Honestly, as a lifelong introvert and loner, I am perfectly content to stay right where I am. I can live vicariously through RUclips creators like you and be happy. On that note I have to say that I'm really happy for you! It's great to see you grow and find yourself while remaining completely real. Thank you!
Those “don’t talk all the time but pick up right where we left off when we’re together” types of friendships are my absolute favorites. I’m super introverted so don’t usually “need” (or even want as harsh at that sounds) constant communication no matter how much I love the person, so I just don’t usually think to reach out unless I have something specific to talk to someone about. My best friend and I have that type of relationship and it works so well for us, like we can go months without talking and most of our text conversations are just planning when and where we’re gonna hang out, but neither of us ever has to worry if the other is mad or anything like that, and when we’re together it’s pretty much exactly like it was when we were living together (we actually met when we were randomly paired as roommates in our college dorm and got to be really good friends) main difference is now we usually have a couple months’ worth of happenings to catch each other up on rather than just the happenings of that day and an adorable toddler running around. I think that’s the hard part of making new friends for me, is that stress of thinking “are they gonna think I hate them if I don’t text them everyday?”
I still have close friends from grade school. Yes, grade school. And we are in our mid 50’s! Even though our lives went different directions, and to different cities, we still try to get together a couple of times a year. People come and go in your life, but your tried and true friends are forever. Glad you stay connected to yours. 💜
I completely agree with you. Friendships are suppose to happen naturally and just because you haven't shared in a while, it doesn't mean it's not real or sincere. Also, do no allow a 'friend' to control your life or your mind. Nobody knows how to live their lives better than oneself. I have known friends that are controlling and misleading. Don't follow those types.. I love that part where you said, 'you have your life and they have theirs and it's good to share every now and then.' You used different wordings, but the idea is the same. I don't like pushy friendships, that get too personal and too close too fast, those I view with suspicion. Nobody is supposed to run your life but you. These days you have to know who you trust and who you bring into your home, especially when you live alone. It's best to get to know people gradually, based on common interests and common values. Never sacrifice your values for anybody. If a friend is sincere, they will walk with you, and not lead you. I have always loved and believed in this saying'... "Do not walk ahead of me, I will not follow, do not walk behind me, I will not lead, walk beside me, and be my friend." .. no matter what age a person is, or whether male or female, this is what I call friendship. it's respectful and reciprocal. It is also trusting in nature when the time is right. I have also learned perhaps the most important lesson of all, and that's that I am my own best friend. I take myself out there, I enjoy the scenery and I talk to whoever is there, and then I go home and I snuggle in bed with a good book or the TV. I love watching movies with my little dog on my lap and life is wonderful. My love of animals & being out in nature is also such a comfort and joy in my life. I share my life with my precious pets. They have been my best friends of all. They offer me their unconditional love and they never hurt me or let me down.
You are very self-aware! Planting seeds is something that I've started and stopped my entire life as a very introverted person. Yes, making friends in your 20s is worlds different than in your 30s and more so in your 40s and beyond for the reasons that you stated. I'm 47 and still struggle to "plant the seeds" without expectation - perhaps I put too much pressure on myself, and if a connection or friendship doesn't manifest, I get down in the dumps and give up. It's a vicious cycle. The friendships I had in my 20s became extinct long ago. Same with friends from my 30s. But, you are very wise, and you are doing exactly what you think you should do, and that's all that matters. Friendships are always a 2-way street, and if you're not getting back what you're putting into a friendship (or any relationship), it cannot last. I've learned that the hard way too many times.💔 And your glasses are lovely - us glasses-wearing women are HOT!!!! 🤣💚
What an interesting video. I’m married and a grandma but I so enjoyed hearing how you are getting out more and making connections, no matter how brief, with all kinds of people. You seem much happier for doing it, so I hope you keep it up. I also love seeing you out and about in NYC and that tea shop looked absolutely charming. Have a great weekend and week ahead! 😊
This is such a good message. I have friends who lately we haven’t talked much too. Not because we’re in a bad situation, but just because we’ve both been busy with our own lives. And this video kinda just reminds me that this sort of thing is normal in friendships
It's interesting that people who are more introverted say they are trying to be less so and are making an effort to connect socially. You rarely see an extrovert saying they are trying to be less extroverted and making an effort to see less people. Introverted people get their energy from alone time and need it to recharge. Extroverted people get their energy from being with people and need that to feel healthy. One isn't better than the other. Chelsea, I love listening to you talk through all this. I'm sure you will find a balance that makes you happy. PS: The new glasses Rock!
Everything has changed so much for me since lockdown. Before then I was an all out extrovert and now I see myself as an extroverted introvert. I can only deal with people in small doses and I can no longer stand crowds of people. Some friendships have fallen by the wayside but the ones that count are still there. It’s harder to maintain our friendships as we get older as we’re so busy and pulled in so many directions.
Chelsea, I love your videos. I was you once, living alone in New York. What changed my life was graduate school. I met so many people in school, incliding my husband. It is so rewarding, moving toward a goal that will change your career path.
Hi Chelsea! Long time watcher - first time commenter. Chiming in with my thoughts on social activity and connecting. I’m a voice actor in LA whose business really took off during the pandemic where we were all comfortable recording in our little home studios and not seeing people. Flash forward to 2022 and I felt so isolated and decided I needed to make a change. I started putting myself out there, connecting with people I met in zoom classes and being the first to make plans. Not my style at all but I had this thought - I could continue what I’m doing and hope people connect with me OR I could take the scary step and make it happen myself. Happy to say now I have friends and a network that has done so much good for my mental health, sanity, and as a weird extra perk, my business. A lot of the people I connected with became genuine friends and we support each other chasing our dreams. Sometimes you have to make the first move because you never know what connection can lead to a relationship you wouldn’t have wanted to miss out on. Love your channel! Supporting and cheering for you just as I do my friends in LA. xo Nicky
I’m an introvert entering my mid-twenties, this vid made me feel happy and inspired. I find it a lot easier to keep long term friends than branching out to make new ones but that’s one of my goals for 2024. Enjoy the snow! ❤️ from WA
I keep in touch with my friends via phone, text, dinner dates & cocktail nights. I am lucky enough to have 2 of my besties from High School. It takes work to nurture those friendships. Sometimes it is a long time in between meet ups because we are all busy. I still reach out to check in with them & make future plans for meet ups. This is great for your mental health & happiness!!!
Hey Chelsea! I'm an introvert as well and my friend group has gotten smaller and smaller since college. Last year I joined 4 Meetup groups. I haven't made lifelong friends but have gotten the opportunity to hang out with cool people and visit places in my community.
Thank you for sharing this with me. As an introvert I have very few friends. I do have a handful of really close friendships, which is great. But, sometimes I do feel lonely. I often choose to stay home and isolate myself by choice. But sometimes I feel like this is not healthy and the best thing for my mental health. I also have a hard time in social situations with new people. My anxiety goes thru the roof.
Kudos for you being proactive in socializing. My friends and i have a phrase we use to tell eachother good job when we do something that is hard... it's "gut gemacht". in german it means good job or well done and sometimes you need someone to tell you good job
I live in Greenpoint so I am close to you! I very much relate to this as the pandemic really changed things for me- I now work from home and I pretty much hang out with my dog and my sister who is also my roommate. I have been in NYC for 14 years and during this time almost all of my friends here have moved away. Most days I enjoy the solitude but I feel like I need to try and go make some more friends as it really makes life better.
I have to say, it makes me so happy to watch your video this evening and seeing how much space you have in your home and remembering the journey to get there. You’re giving us shots from different rooms and more angles now. I love it, so fun. ❤😁
I’m so thankful for this video! One of my goals for this year is to find my people. As an introvert, it’s hard to find the desire to make plans and keep them with other people. But I also recognize that we are not meant to do life alone. It’s tough to make and keep friends, but your video reminds me that i’m not alone ❤
Fellow introvert living away from home here 🙋♀️ I relate SO much and have to say, watching your videos makes me feel less alone and makes me proud that we are challenging ourselves and going outside of the usual comfort zone! 🤍
I am the same way. I am so focused on my goals that I forget to socialize. Trying to be better. Glad I am not the only one. I was in New York over the weekend (freezing to death!) and kept thinking I might see you but you were probably staying inside and warm. Hope it is getting warmer there!
Making friends at any age is challenging but can happen. I somehow arrived at 60, divorced, no children and living in a different state than my youth. Most friends from my youth scattered around the world literally I decided that 2020 I was going to put myself out there - well we all know what happened. Fast forward to today, I have joined Meetup and some Facebook groups for elders and travel minded ladies From this I have made local friends and am building relationships I find that their stories are similar - life changes, estrangements and/or inertia. It is never too late
I feel this video deeply. After stepping away from friendships I’ve had for well over a decade, I was so scared. Trying to make new friends in your late 20’s is hard but I’m finding them while doing the activities I already enjoyed doing it’s been easier to start with common interests already established. I hope all your planted seeds flourish this year!
I’ve discovered your channel during the holiday and you’ve been a bit a fresh air for me. Though I am 20 years older than you, I feel that we are experiencing the same things. Living alone (with my cat) and being at a comfortable place in my life, I really have to push myself to go out there and connect with people outside of my work group. I guess, it’s a continuous life goal for introverts ☺️
Totally agree about the friends part, friendships are different in your 30's. I really enjoy talking to different types of people and I learn so much from people of all ages, especially when I travel. It's the best, I really like hearing someone's story, their thought system as it challenges me and opens me up to things I haven't necessarily thought of before. I too get nervous meeting new people, though these days I simply see it as excitement and its really no pressure situation as you don't have to see them again. Some people you always have a close bond even though you may be on a different path or don't talk for awhile when you do, it's like it was before life changed before you both. It's great to have a range of different people, acquaintances, close friends, friends you do a hobby with etc. I think big cities are like that, people more individualistic. It's so nice you are volunteering! Good to see you socializing more :)
I live in London in the UK although I’m from Lisbon and I’m a social person for kind, lovely and honest souls 😊 socially my life has been on stand by for a long time, for various reasons. Time is a thieve and life can be incredibly difficult and challenging to… I’m a new subscriber and I love your channel ❤
I always feel more comfortable with myself, not into peopleing that much. When I need conversation, I go to the grocery store, the checker at the register is always willing to hold a conversation for a few minutes❤ love your videos.
I am in a similar place in my life and to be honest I am not putting myself out there. This makes me inspired to make more of an effort. Being at home enjoying my own company is comfortable, but I also miss connections with friends. The pandemic really made me drift away from a lot of my friends.
I think it happened to a lot of us tbh. I'm probably 'somewhat' older than many viewers so I'm no longer especially into week-night socialising every week or packing weekends with social stuff but I really do need to get out more. Otherwise my life is just work- vegetate-work-vegetate! !
I'm an ambivert, but with strong introvert tendencies. I don't mind being by myself and love it most of time. You definitely have to occasionally put yourself out there but I will say most of my friendships come from being "adopted" by extroverts which is nice because they take the reigns and I just go with the flow. Highly recommend haha
I am so very impressed by you Chelsea. As a full time RUclipsr you’re still making time not only for yourself but for others by volunteering and making sure you’re hanging out with people 🥹🩵 I struggle with my social life too so I’m trying to hang out with one person I haven’t in a long time once a month! Maybe we can meet each other along the way ✨
I went on a cruise this summer with friends from high school and some I hadn't seen since we graduated. I think we were all nervous in the beginning, but we quickly discovered that the time didn't make a difference, and we all had more in common than we ever thought. Even planned another trip a few months later. Point of my story, take those opportunities and moments when you can, Chelsea. 😊
Thank you so much for delivering meals to the elderly! My auntie lives on the upper east side and gets meals on wheels. Maybe you met her. It gives me such peace of mind to know that you and others are helping her since I cannot be there as often as I would like. Once again thank you and hello from Oregon!!❤
I have worried about this before and found I was spending my life saying “sorry I haven’t messaged/contacted you” all the time but I am trying to remember now it is a two way street as the guilt I was feeling was getting me down so much.
I’m actually transitioning from the few friendships I had and looking for more stable friends. I used to be a party animal so I’ve realized those friends are fun but don’t contribute to have mental stability.
Chelsea, I haven't even started watching the video yet, but I want to take this opportunity to let you know how much I like your videos, your channel is progressing because you give off an honest and genuine vibe, without filters, I'm also starting my 30's and I can relate a lot about what you convey about not fully knowing what you are doing or if you are going in the right direction and how overwhelming it is to make certain decisions. You are a very pretty girl but the best thing about you is that you are authentic despite being exposed to being judged by strangers on the internet, that takes courage and is rare in most people. uhhhh and I hope your coffee talks come back and become a section from time to time.
Low maintenance friendships are such a blessing. They weather so many storms in adulthood and even if you don't get to talk to them or see the friend, you know they are out there and they support you. Just the best. Love the new glasses, looking so sharp!
Recently found your channel ! Thank you so much for posting and for being an inspiration. You’re extremely motivating and because of you I won’t give up. Thank you for showing that not everything has to be extremely aesthetic. While I do enjoy those kind of NYC videos it is also not possible for most people. Keep going Chelsea you’re doing great. I hope to one day also be an inspiration ❤thank you for inspiring me. Virtual Hugs !
Hi Chelsea! I've been really enjoying all of your videos :) I'm 30 something too and it's been so much to relate haha. I like you said "sometime just plant the seed and let the universe take it from there". Feel like that's what I needed to hear today!! Thanks so much and take care
I’ve become so very introverted over the years and love to hibernate, but oh how your fun videos make me yearn to get out there again like the old days! Uh, Juliana’s apartment? Chef’s kiss!! 🙌 A cozy and chic oasis for the bonding of friends, for sure. And that tea shop is calling my name!! Ah, NYC…how dare you go on without me. But deep down I’m so glad it does for all the people like you who keep her alive and kicking. Big hugs to you, Chelsea, for the volunteering you do and the walks that take us through your world, even if just room to room. Clink, clink! ☕️❤️☕️
very happy to see a post from you!! even happier that you seem to really be focusing on watering your life and i’m so excited to see how full it becomes. much love from texas!
Sometimes I feel a little lonely as well. I live in a semi rural area and have retired. The last several years I helped my sister care for my mom until she passed. I've had a couple surgeries, and during the holidays, for some reason I didn't really want to connect with anybody outside my immediate family. So I'm going to think about ways I can make more connections outside of my immediate family. You have inspired me. And I still love that color of your kitchen by the way. And your glasses are so cute. I look forward to every single one of your vlogs. You just keep it real and that's really what matters to me.
As an only child, I tend to be OK on my own to an extent. I think I require time alone to "charge" myself back up. I retired and moved from where I had made friends for many years. Now I'm back near where I grew up, living in the country. Primarily I communicate with some of my friends from where I worked but have not made any real connections since moving here in 2018. I did attend my first water color/Journaling class yesterday which I really enjoyed...stepping out of my comfort zone did feel good and I just need to "shove" myself out the door far more often...thank you for sharing your anxieties with us!!...there are so many of us who can really identify with what you are going through!!
I feel you with the social life. I'm an introvert as well with TONS of hobbies. I just like to spend my weekends knitting. But as I'm also a freelance photographer, I don't have co-workers and work from home. So it can get lonely, so I actively need to seek out my friends every once in a while. I still have friends from 10 years ago or so, which I'm grateful for! But lots of them have moved and have kids nowadays, so it's not the same as it was. But I still appreciate them lots ❤ That being said: I love LOVE Julie's apartment! Love her style :D (I think she was called Julie?)
Chelsea! This is my first time commenting on your channel, but I've been excitedly following ever since your very inspiring NYC Marathon video ❤ I find your work so comforting because I relate to you SO much. I'm 33, living alone in NYC (also moved here when I was 25 and worked in restaurants for years), making videos for a living, very unsure of what the future holds. I naturally lean introvert, but ever since a big breakup in 2020, I've put myself out there and made a handful of incredible new friends who feel like family now. There is no shortage of really cool people in this city who also feel a bit lonely after the pandemic and are looking for connection. I found my newest besties while working on video shoots, protesting, hanging in a local dive bar, annnd on the Camino de Santiago. All very random, but fated, I think 🤗🥳 Rooting for you and this new phase of your life 💖
I used to volunteer before the pandemic. Now because of you, I’m going to get back on the volunteer train. It’s so satisfying mentally and physically to help others without expecting anything in return, just being a decent human being helping others. You are inspiring, whether you feel you are or not. Good time you out and about! Goddamn Julie is so cool, her apt is bangin’!
8:39 I deliver for Meals on Wheels in my town & it’s one of my favorite things. I mostly deliver to seniors & they are the sweetest ever. I have the same route each time and you get to know the people. I just LOVE it!!
I have been going through the same issue as to where did all of my friends go? I used to be a social butterfly in my 20s and now I just stay at home watching RUclips..I have experienced some loss that has caused me to shut off and to be honest it changed my outgoing personality..I am having such a hard time making new friends which is why I can differently relate to the content in this video ..I love your glasses and I am going to purchase a pair after I get my new eye exam next week..Take Care ❤. Btw,I miss snow enjoy it .
Yes! Im 38 and i live in a rural area on the west coast of Ireland. I have good friends but they either dont live close by or are in relationships and dont have time to meet up. I love where i live and the nature aspect (im an artist) but the only social life i have is work nights out or meeting with friends (maybe once a month). I have very little in common with most people in my area and it is very irritating. I think sometimes i would love to move to a city like new york where theres a lot more diversity and culture! I also live with daily anxiety, but you're doing so well! A change in mindset can do wonders for your own wellbeing and it's a constant work in progress ❤❤
Hi Chelsea! As an introvert, I totally get what you said and I feel the same. Usually, I get so anxious when I have to have a social interaction that it kind of worries me. I've been unemployed for a while so I think I missing my few social skills lol. But, as you said, we need to put ourselves out sometimes, because at the end of the day, we feel amazing after having a nice social interaction.
I had the same group of friends my whole life. Until I moved permanently out west. I tried to keep them going but old people are grouchy🤣. I joined a private work out club, a church, went to the same coffee shops etc. I’m outgoing but after 12 years on and off here I’ve never met a person to hang with. Like you said, people have established their groups. Like cement. I go alone everywhere. Smile, chat, listen, give my number out, never hear from them, but I’m still out there. I like myself, I like my dogs, I like my RV and taking off alone with my dogs. I guess I’m doomed to be alone😆. Love your content btw. And your volunteering, which I have not done
I'm 30 living in brooklyn and I'm in a super similar spot socially! Caroline Winkler (another vlogger) recently talked about this in a video, and she recommended using Bumble BFF, so I've been trying that recently! Haven't met with anyone, but I've been surprised to see how many cool ladies are on there who are in a friendship rut and looking to meet new people-even just swiping through has made me feel less alone in this predicament.
And you have us!!! We love ya Chelsea.❤ I so wanted to watch this last night but was stuck at the hospital with my son and I lent him my headset so he didn't drive everyone nuts with his games 😂 You bring up so many amazing points in this vlog. I left Canada and moved to England at 37 with 2 kids. Really knew no one. Being an introvert like yourself I was like "hellllllllo squirrels in the park, lets be friends" 👋🏻🐿🥹 I really had to step out of my comfort zone which was so challenging as it was a totally different culture and in some areas, accent 🥴 Thank you for taking us along for adventures in NYC. Thank you for sharing with us. Challenges us and gets us thinking about things. I truly appreciate you Chelsea ❤
I am definitely introverted…Happiest in my own place…or hanging out with my pup…But, I do agree..we all need to plant seeds if we want new people in our lives…Chelsea..Have a lovely weekend 💕🤗👍🌸
The music in this video is lovely and calming. Volunteering during the pandemic really helped me feel useful and stretched that social/ human interaction muscle that this introvert so often times lets wither. Thank you for sharing your perspective on what you are experiencing, Chelsea. Your honesty helps me not feel so out of sorts about what I am going thru myself. 💖
This video made me happy. I feel like I have lost my social life. What I once use to enjoy doesn’t make me excited anymore but I’m realizing it’s okay, I’ll find my way eventually.
Sometimes I have the same thoughts and want to commit to getting out more and being more social, but I have to watch how much I commit to otherwise I get burned out!! I have to remind myself even getting coffee or lunch with a friend once or twice a month is better than nothing!
Love your glasses!! 👓 My friend lost 50% of her hair from covid in 2020. She cut her hair shoulder length after she got a soft curl perm to give her fullness so she wouldn't have to use a hot straightner or dryer. It's amazing how much her hair grew in...in a year. 😊❤
@@BusWill2006Oh it breaks my heart to read about our loss of vision. I’m so sorry. The so called “vaccine” has cause to much sickness. The plandemic has harmed mankind in many ways. Take care of yourself.
Hey Chelsea! You showed up on my recs this week. Absolutely love your content! Thanks for all your time! I've always wanted to live in New York and you give the closest thing and make it so honest and true.....
Super random! But you have such high cheekbones and I love them! They’re so cute. Your smile really makes them standout. I noticed when you were doing your deliveries to seniors. 😊
You’re so wise and evolved! There was a period of time in my very late 20s after complete upheaval with my first stabilizing step being to get a job with very regular hours and then chaotic advertising hours when I volunteered in NYC. It actually was quite memorable. An old man made me a ring out of a dollar when I went to play bingo with seniors at the Bialystoker center. They were so competitive it was a hoot! Then with zero training I helped coach people through interviews and one man was so appreciative, I got the impression he needed practice speaking English so now I want my retirement career to be teaching ESL, I wish it paid my NYC bills otherwise I’d do it now. About ten years later I did a church soup kitchen singles event which was really odd with the religious stuff going on and I didn’t meet any guys but I felt very much awakened to the needs of working poor and homeless in the city. It is definitely worth it putting ourselves out there! I wish my friendships didn’t falter when friends had kids and went to the suburbs and then even distance happened with NYC based friends without kids during COVID so I need to reflect on what’s healthy growing apart vs negligence in sustaining a friendship.
I've found what you said about being alone very interesting, that you feel good on your own, and that you don't put your happiness in other people. That's so wise! And I envy you for that, that's a part of me I have to work on. Thanks for sharing 😊
It's so nice to see you finding balance in your life. I, like you, tend to spend my time in solitude. I love being alone. But sometimes you need to be physically in the presence of humans.
I used to always be a very social person until I started working from home and moving to a new state, so i don’t even know where to begin with meeting ppl/friends , thanks for the inspiration ,love ur personality ❤ this Is my sign to start being more social!
Chelsea! I hear you about enjoying solitude….i am the oldest of 10 children and we lived in Chicago (in the city). We were packed in that little three bedroom house. I love being alone even though I have been married for decades. I like Me most of the time….😅
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I would guess 23 to 25. You do NOT look 30....let ALONE 32. ❤
Any good Italian bakery?
Hi friends!! Anyone else struggling with their social life? lol. (Side note, it's snowing in NYC today. So cozy! Stay safe out there!)
Yes 😅 love staying cozy indoors! Putting yourself out there is a struggle sometimes!
This is day 8 not leaving my apartment due to the ice storm in Portland. Cabin fever is real!! I would give anything to see one of my friends or family in person right now.
omg that's awful! I hope it melts soon🥺@@delilah8476
In tennessee we are snowed in as well day 5 not leaving the house 😢 love your videos by the way i look forward to them!
Yes! I love my life, but seeing friends in person is rare these days. I'm in my mid-thirties and live in the suburbs of a large city with my partner & his daughters. I mostly work from home and have autoimmune conditions & chronic pain that make it difficult to spend extra time in the city to socialize with friends. My plan is to try to make friends in our community in 2024 ✨ Looking forward to watching your video on my lunch break - your channel is relatable and comforting! Have an awesome day, Chelsea 😊
How did you get to be so wise at 32?!! I'm a 60 year-old woman and I'm learning so much from you. Also, your friend's apartment is gorgeous!
Why do we 60 year old connect with Chelsea? It’s like having a daughter on RUclips.
Yesss!! I just turned 60 last month and really enjoy Chelsea’s video-my daughter is 33, so maybe that’s why 😊
I'm almost there too, with kids early 30s/late 20s. I'm sure that's part of the reason, but also, Chelsea is building her life and I feel like I"m rebuilding mine after raising kids and a divorce. And hey, I still feel young! 😃
I think she reminds me of who I was at 32, I miss that person, but I also love who I am today ❤
I love that. Wisdom and knowledge has no age limit. There’s always new insight to learn
it's so interesting the way things have shifted, like it's way more common now for women to be unmarried into their 30s and we're all just trying to find community in new ways. It's pretty cool, there needs to be some way for all of us to find each other!
As a fellow introvert i felt this video to my core lol!! Im also trying to plant my own seeds and establish a friend group after moving to a completely new area, its tough but when its good its so fulfilling. Even when its just a once a month catch up its just nice to have people to confide in!
Yes, agree 100%. When you find people who make the investment to meet up once a month to continue to do life with you - those friends are gold. I think a lot of introverts understand this and are willing to put their energy into friendships with real reciprocity.
A lot of my friendships faded in my 20s, and now, in my 40s, my friendships exist almost solely online. I have one friend in the town where I live (I've known her since childhood, and we just happen to live near each other now), and in the 3 years I've lived here, we've gotten together once. I've never even met her husband and kids. My partner and I have been together for over 25 years, so we're each other's social lives, pretty much. We see my family sometimes, but it's mostly just the two of us all day every day. I love him and I love being with him all the time, but I'm missing that connection with other women that I used to have. ❤️
Hugs💜
Your comment is so relatable. I’m 40 in April and I’ve been with my husband since 2001, so like you, my husband is my social life (we get on well so it’s nice to spend time together). As an introvert I do keep myself to myself but I do feel like I miss having other like minded people to socialise with from time to time. Perhaps I should make that my goal this year 😊
This is so real. Thank you for sharing your story! Online friendships are wonderful 💖
My life...😅
I think once you hit 30 it becomes more difficult to find new friends. But when you do post 20’s, you really know the value and know they are so special. I also think that post 30 your friends automatically default to the FaceTime life 😂 and thank God for that technology! I have found that the Marco Polo app has been a life saver in keeping up relationships with my friends from all over. I love catching up in long video messages to one another. There is something to be said about picking up right where you left off without the goodbyes or I’ll see you laters. I cherish those relationships.
Love your sponsor blurbs. Quite clever and not obnoxious to watch.
I appreciate this! Thank you 🙏🏻
this year I moved home to my parents at 33, 6 months of focus and discipline I cleared my credit card debt! Naturally friendships faded when I moved around but since I've been home I realised the people who matter will come to you! And also I was putting myself in debt for people who didn't give back the same energy and I wasted a lot of time! Since I have been home I've had the best non stop social life as I think the people who matter will naturally come to you, the best advice I've been given is "You have to be ok on your own" so I booked solo trips but ended up with friends tagging along (not complaining !) I also pre booked and paid some new fitness classes that were non refundable so I force myself out my comfort zone 🥵 ... you just never know who you could meet! 💜 Also snowing here in the UK 🌨👋xx
Two introverts just volunteering and living their quiet lives: that's how I met my husband of 12 years. I also have a few good friends from that same volunteering gig. It's a no pressure way of getting to know people. And for every person you meet volunteering puts you in touch with their people. Chances are they are like-minded if you're roaming in the same circles.
I'm quite a bit older than you but can really relate to this. It is effortless when you are college age-I didn't have to "work" for friendships; they just automatically happened. I was never deprived of being with other people. I held onto many of those friendships and even though we are still friends after all of these years, I rarely see them. I literally just lost my best friend of almost 40 years on Wednesday. She's really the only person who I did things with. It gets harder, Chelsea...I'm 50 and no one really wants to get together anymore. I gave up on trying a long time ago and just pretty much go with the flow day in and out. All you can do is "sow seeds." It's good that you recognized this now. Because nothing is as disappointing when you put in a lot of effort, and it bears no fruit. Love watching your vlogs; I love how real you are.
I'm so sorry you just lost your best friend... I relate very much to your post here and I'm 47. And you're exactly right - no one wants to get together anymore. No one tries to keep in touch. People just live their lives with those closest to them and real friendship seems to be obsolete. For a long time I was really down in the dumps about not making any new friends, but I also gave up a while ago. My best friend who moved back to Ireland no longer texts me, no Merry Christmas, No Happy New Year... nothing, so I stopped contacting her. It hurts more than I can express, but friendships can not be forced. Thanks for sharing your experiences.
Big love to you ❤
@@marsol1979 💙💚🧡
I just saw your comment now, I am so sorry for the loss of your best friend. My heart goes out to you ❤
@@ChelseaCallahan thank you so much!💜
Low Maintenance Friends = High Value Friends. PS Great to see the voluntary work. I do befriending here in Winchester, UK with elderly. One lady, Sue, has become such a firm friend. She's wise, humble and has lived such a colourful, meaningful life. She worked for a charity with trafficked women for years in London. Her wisdom and insight is so valuable. Sadly she's housebound now but has a very very positive outlook. Friendship can happen anywhere. x
Ooh i like that saying- low maintenance friends = high value friends 😊👍🏻
@@MandyBarry My closest friends and I really truly believe this. Its just like wearing a comfortable old sweater. It just fits. No drama, no toxicity, just kindness, fun and support for each other. We came up with that saying when saying how lucky we are! :)
I had friends I hanged out with in my 20s. But like you said, things happen and now I don’t even talk to them no more. I’m too focus on my own goals and they are too. If I get new friends, that’s great but I’m not holding my breath about it.
The pandemic really changed a lot of things for people. I'm an extrovert and even I don't see my friends that often anymore which really surprises me. I decided to go back to work just to get out of the house for social interaction. I love it!!
I've recently moved back to an area where I'm able to spend time with a lot of my friends from high school/childhood which has been SO nice but most of them are married with kids or expecting, buying a house, at the top of their careers, etc. So I've been wanting to make new friends/meet more people who are in a more similar "time of life" to myself (30s, single, just really starting a career, etc.). I recently found a local book club that meets up in some cool places in the heart of my city I'm exciting to start attending next month, and I've been looking into local craft stores to join groups and classes there with the hopes of making some new friends too! It's slow going and hella intimidating but I'm excited!
For me I lost connections with friends as I was raising my sons. The hard lesson I have learned that kids grow up and are going to start living their lives and I am alone. It's really hard meeting friends in my 50's. You are really inspiring me.❤
I was born and raised in NYC and, for what it's worth, I am always curious about what brings people here and I love to hear about where they are from, etc. It may be 'small talk,' but I find it interesting. I'm sure other NY'ers do, too, so don't be shy!
I had a hard time making friends here, but, once I had kids just a few years ago, it became much easier to make mom friends. I've definitely met quite a few at the playground. haha. It is a bit weird because most of my current friends are transplants, and I'm never sure how long they'll actually stay in NY. At least 5 of them have already moved away in the past 5 years, so that part kind of sucks.
I love how making friends is a high priority for you. As a never married female who's 30's are way behind her, I wish I had made this a big priority in my 30's. Well played friend.
I’m also an introvert who genuinely loves solitude and spending time alone. Sometimes I feel like there is a lot of pressure to be social, when, at least in my opinion, the amount of social interaction one needs varies tremendously. That said, I do think it’s good to plant those seeds and work through how much social interaction you need to creating a fulfilling life. I do that when I find myself retreating too far into my own world.
I have a very similar and opposite experience. I lived in NYC for about 10 years, and I recently had to move back home for family health stuff. I love all of my NYC/Boston/SF friends, but I realized I needed to have at least some casual friends to grab dinner with in my home town. I literally got a job waiting tables on the weekends and joined a semi-pro choir just to find some likeminded people. I now have three or four friends I can call on, and a handful of other friendly acquaintances, in a place I LITERALLY never wanted to be again. Makes it a little bit easier to be away from my chosen family. Making friends is hard, but if you join something you enjoy, you'll inevitably find your people again in the new place.
I have always had a small group of friends. I used to think it was because we moved so much so finding and building long-term friendships in new places was difficult. Then when I got older, I started thinking that I was just different and it was hard to find and maintain a large group of friends. I self-proclaimed myself to be socially awkward. It was easy to be likeable, talk to people, and get to people to want to hang out, yet I often found not wanting to and picking my own company that felt so nice.
After a lot of self-discovery throughout 20s and early 30s, ADHD diagnosis in mid 30s a lot of things fell in place and I realized that 1) I just really love being by myself and that is something to treasure since it gives you a stability and strength many cannot imagine, as they are terrified to be in their own company, and 2) it is not a requirement to have a ton of friends.
So instead I focused on being a better friend to the small group of close and dear friends I managed to gain over the years. I make more effort to reach out, to make plans and be in their lives. But I also learnt to balance it out and give myself plenty of alone time to allow myself to recharge to be social again.
You are definitely not alone in how you seem to look at friendships and connections. Don't feel the pressure to make and maintain lots of friends.
Me too, I definitely can get awkward in social situations. Although that mostly happens in big groups and I’ve never felt comfortable in bigger groups. Aside from this I thought there was something wrong with me, that perhaps I’m very socially awkward but I really think it’s 1) my adhd and 2) I just really like being alone too. When I was in college or when I used to work in an offfice, I always made friends very easily I just had a hard time keeping them but I think it’s mainly because I’m just so comfortable by myself. I’m in my early 30s and I’ve learned to accept it ❤
@@kaleyjoplinRAWRRyou literally described me in your comment
Honestly, as a lifelong introvert and loner, I am perfectly content to stay right where I am. I can live vicariously through RUclips creators like you and be happy. On that note I have to say that I'm really happy for you! It's great to see you grow and find yourself while remaining completely real. Thank you!
Those “don’t talk all the time but pick up right where we left off when we’re together” types of friendships are my absolute favorites. I’m super introverted so don’t usually “need” (or even want as harsh at that sounds) constant communication no matter how much I love the person, so I just don’t usually think to reach out unless I have something specific to talk to someone about. My best friend and I have that type of relationship and it works so well for us, like we can go months without talking and most of our text conversations are just planning when and where we’re gonna hang out, but neither of us ever has to worry if the other is mad or anything like that, and when we’re together it’s pretty much exactly like it was when we were living together (we actually met when we were randomly paired as roommates in our college dorm and got to be really good friends) main difference is now we usually have a couple months’ worth of happenings to catch each other up on rather than just the happenings of that day and an adorable toddler running around. I think that’s the hard part of making new friends for me, is that stress of thinking “are they gonna think I hate them if I don’t text them everyday?”
I still have close friends from grade school. Yes, grade school. And we are in our mid 50’s! Even though our lives went different directions, and to different cities, we still try to get together a couple of times a year. People come and go in your life, but your tried and true friends are forever. Glad you stay connected to yours. 💜
That is truly rare and super special!
I completely agree with you. Friendships are suppose to happen naturally and just because you haven't shared in a while, it doesn't mean it's not real or sincere. Also, do no allow a 'friend' to control your life or your mind. Nobody knows how to live their lives better than oneself. I have known friends that are controlling and misleading. Don't follow those types.. I love that part where you said, 'you have your life and they have theirs and it's good to share every now and then.' You used different wordings, but the idea is the same. I don't like pushy friendships, that get too personal and too close too fast, those I view with suspicion. Nobody is supposed to run your life but you. These days you have to know who you trust and who you bring into your home, especially when you live alone. It's best to get to know people gradually, based on common interests and common values. Never sacrifice your values for anybody. If a friend is sincere, they will walk with you, and not lead you. I have always loved and believed in this saying'... "Do not walk ahead of me, I will not follow, do not walk behind me, I will not lead, walk beside me, and be my friend." .. no matter what age a person is, or whether male or female, this is what I call friendship. it's respectful and reciprocal. It is also trusting in nature when the time is right. I have also learned perhaps the most important lesson of all, and that's that I am my own best friend. I take myself out there, I enjoy the scenery and I talk to whoever is there, and then I go home and I snuggle in bed with a good book or the TV. I love watching movies with my little dog on my lap and life is wonderful. My love of animals & being out in nature is also such a comfort and joy in my life. I share my life with my precious pets. They have been my best friends of all. They offer me their unconditional love and they never hurt me or let me down.
You are very self-aware! Planting seeds is something that I've started and stopped my entire life as a very introverted person. Yes, making friends in your 20s is worlds different than in your 30s and more so in your 40s and beyond for the reasons that you stated. I'm 47 and still struggle to "plant the seeds" without expectation - perhaps I put too much pressure on myself, and if a connection or friendship doesn't manifest, I get down in the dumps and give up. It's a vicious cycle. The friendships I had in my 20s became extinct long ago. Same with friends from my 30s. But, you are very wise, and you are doing exactly what you think you should do, and that's all that matters. Friendships are always a 2-way street, and if you're not getting back what you're putting into a friendship (or any relationship), it cannot last. I've learned that the hard way too many times.💔 And your glasses are lovely - us glasses-wearing women are HOT!!!! 🤣💚
What an interesting video. I’m married and a grandma but I so enjoyed hearing how you are getting out more and making connections, no matter how brief, with all kinds of people. You seem much happier for doing it, so I hope you keep it up. I also love seeing you out and about in NYC and that tea shop looked absolutely charming. Have a great weekend and week ahead! 😊
This is such a good message. I have friends who lately we haven’t talked much too. Not because we’re in a bad situation, but just because we’ve both been busy with our own lives. And this video kinda just reminds me that this sort of thing is normal in friendships
It's interesting that people who are more introverted say they are trying to be less so and are making an effort to connect socially. You rarely see an extrovert saying they are trying to be less extroverted and making an effort to see less people. Introverted people get their energy from alone time and need it to recharge. Extroverted people get their energy from being with people and need that to feel healthy. One isn't better than the other. Chelsea, I love listening to you talk through all this. I'm sure you will find a balance that makes you happy. PS: The new glasses Rock!
Everything has changed so much for me since lockdown. Before then I was an all out extrovert and now I see myself as an extroverted introvert. I can only deal with people in small doses and I can no longer stand crowds of people. Some friendships have fallen by the wayside but the ones that count are still there. It’s harder to maintain our friendships as we get older as we’re so busy and pulled in so many directions.
Chelsea, I love your videos. I was you once, living alone in New York. What changed my life was graduate school. I met so many people in school, incliding my husband. It is so rewarding, moving toward a goal that will change your career path.
Hi Chelsea! Long time watcher - first time commenter.
Chiming in with my thoughts on social activity and connecting. I’m a voice actor in LA whose business really took off during the pandemic where we were all comfortable recording in our little home studios and not seeing people. Flash forward to 2022 and I felt so isolated and decided I needed to make a change. I started putting myself out there, connecting with people I met in zoom classes and being the first to make plans. Not my style at all but I had this thought - I could continue what I’m doing and hope people connect with me OR I could take the scary step and make it happen myself.
Happy to say now I have friends and a network that has done so much good for my mental health, sanity, and as a weird extra perk, my business. A lot of the people I connected with became genuine friends and we support each other chasing our dreams.
Sometimes you have to make the first move because you never know what connection can lead to a relationship you wouldn’t have wanted to miss out on.
Love your channel! Supporting and cheering for you just as I do my friends in LA.
xo
Nicky
i never watch the sponsor portion of videos for anyone else- but YOURS i always watch because you are so creative and cute with it!
"We don't put our happiness on others" so true! Gotta fill our own cup and let others fall in love with the overflow. So happy for you Chelsea!
I’m an introvert entering my mid-twenties, this vid made me feel happy and inspired. I find it a lot easier to keep long term friends than branching out to make new ones but that’s one of my goals for 2024. Enjoy the snow! ❤️ from WA
Hi Chelsea! I have no social life, and I'm more than okay with that!! For the most part, I just prefer my own company, and being in my own space.
I keep in touch with my friends via phone, text, dinner dates & cocktail nights. I am lucky enough to have 2 of my besties from High School. It takes work to nurture those friendships. Sometimes it is a long time in between meet ups because we are all busy. I still reach out to check in with them & make future plans for meet ups. This is great for your mental health & happiness!!!
Hey Chelsea! I'm an introvert as well and my friend group has gotten smaller and smaller since college. Last year I joined 4 Meetup groups. I haven't made lifelong friends but have gotten the opportunity to hang out with cool people and visit places in my community.
I used to do MeetUp before the pandemic- need to have another look at it 😊
Thank you for sharing this with me. As an introvert I have very few friends. I do have a handful of really close friendships, which is great. But, sometimes I do feel lonely. I often choose to stay home and isolate myself by choice. But sometimes I feel like this is not healthy and the best thing for my mental health. I also have a hard time in social situations with new people. My anxiety goes thru the roof.
Kudos for you being proactive in socializing. My friends and i have a phrase we use to tell eachother good job when we do something that is hard... it's "gut gemacht". in german it means good job or well done and sometimes you need someone to tell you good job
I live in Greenpoint so I am close to you! I very much relate to this as the pandemic really changed things for me- I now work from home and I pretty much hang out with my dog and my sister who is also my roommate. I have been in NYC for 14 years and during this time almost all of my friends here have moved away. Most days I enjoy the solitude but I feel like I need to try and go make some more friends as it really makes life better.
I have to say, it makes me so happy to watch your video this evening and seeing how much space you have in your home and remembering the journey to get there. You’re giving us shots from different rooms and more angles now. I love it, so fun. ❤😁
Man why did this nearly make me emotional!! 😭 thanks for coming along for the journey my friend
I’m so thankful for this video! One of my goals for this year is to find my people. As an introvert, it’s hard to find the desire to make plans and keep them with other people. But I also recognize that we are not meant to do life alone. It’s tough to make and keep friends, but your video reminds me that i’m not alone ❤
Fellow introvert living away from home here 🙋♀️ I relate SO much and have to say, watching your videos makes me feel less alone and makes me proud that we are challenging ourselves and going outside of the usual comfort zone! 🤍
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I am the same way. I am so focused on my goals that I forget to socialize. Trying to be better. Glad I am not the only one. I was in New York over the weekend (freezing to death!) and kept thinking I might see you but you were probably staying inside and warm. Hope it is getting warmer there!
Making friends at any age is challenging but can happen. I somehow arrived at 60, divorced, no children and living in a different state than my youth. Most friends from my youth scattered around the world literally I decided that 2020 I was going to put myself out there - well we all know what happened. Fast forward to today, I have joined Meetup and some Facebook groups for elders and travel minded ladies From this I have made local friends and am building relationships I find that their stories are similar - life changes, estrangements and/or inertia. It is never too late
I feel this video deeply. After stepping away from friendships I’ve had for well over a decade, I was so scared. Trying to make new friends in your late 20’s is hard but I’m finding them while doing the activities I already enjoyed doing it’s been easier to start with common interests already established. I hope all your planted seeds flourish this year!
Really enjoyed your chat today. I felt as if we were 2 friends talking over a cup of tea.
Great Video. In this age of Social Media where the "perception" is that everyone is "out" and having "fun", its Good to Actually some Honesty...
I’ve discovered your channel during the holiday and you’ve been a bit a fresh air for me. Though I am 20 years older than you, I feel that we are experiencing the same things. Living alone (with my cat) and being at a comfortable place in my life, I really have to push myself to go out there and connect with people outside of my work group. I guess, it’s a continuous life goal for introverts ☺️
I myself am 32, awkward, and introverted. So I feel this on a spiritual level.
Totally agree about the friends part, friendships are different in your 30's. I really enjoy talking to different types of people and I learn so much from people of all ages, especially when I travel. It's the best, I really like hearing someone's story, their thought system as it challenges me and opens me up to things I haven't necessarily thought of before. I too get nervous meeting new people, though these days I simply see it as excitement and its really no pressure situation as you don't have to see them again. Some people you always have a close bond even though you may be on a different path or don't talk for awhile when you do, it's like it was before life changed before you both. It's great to have a range of different people, acquaintances, close friends, friends you do a hobby with etc. I think big cities are like that, people more individualistic. It's so nice you are volunteering! Good to see you socializing more :)
You are just everything 💖 Your heart is so pure ❤ What a lovely thing for you to do to volunteer. You are amazing Chelsea 💖
I live in London in the UK although I’m from Lisbon and I’m a social person for kind, lovely and honest souls 😊 socially my life has been on stand by for a long time, for various reasons. Time is a thieve and life can be incredibly difficult and challenging to… I’m a new subscriber and I love your channel ❤
I always feel more comfortable with myself, not into peopleing that much. When I need conversation, I go to the grocery store, the checker at the register is always willing to hold a conversation for a few minutes❤ love your videos.
I'm an introvert and I relate hard to this. My own company is usually where I thrive but we all need connections 😊
Thanks for the awesome honest and heartwarming content, Chelsea!
I am in a similar place in my life and to be honest I am not putting myself out there. This makes me inspired to make more of an effort. Being at home enjoying my own company is comfortable, but I also miss connections with friends. The pandemic really made me drift away from a lot of my friends.
I think it happened to a lot of us tbh. I'm probably 'somewhat' older than many viewers so I'm no longer especially into week-night socialising every week or packing weekends with social stuff but I really do need to get out more. Otherwise my life is just work- vegetate-work-vegetate! !
I'm an ambivert, but with strong introvert tendencies. I don't mind being by myself and love it most of time. You definitely have to occasionally put yourself out there but I will say most of my friendships come from being "adopted" by extroverts which is nice because they take the reigns and I just go with the flow. Highly recommend haha
Hi Chelsea! As much as I like hanging out with my friends I also like spending time with myself.
I am so very impressed by you Chelsea. As a full time RUclipsr you’re still making time not only for yourself but for others by volunteering and making sure you’re hanging out with people 🥹🩵 I struggle with my social life too so I’m trying to hang out with one person I haven’t in a long time once a month! Maybe we can meet each other along the way ✨
I went on a cruise this summer with friends from high school and some I hadn't seen since we graduated. I think we were all nervous in the beginning, but we quickly discovered that the time didn't make a difference, and we all had more in common than we ever thought. Even planned another trip a few months later. Point of my story, take those opportunities and moments when you can, Chelsea. 😊
Thank you so much for delivering meals to the elderly! My auntie lives on the upper east side and gets meals on wheels. Maybe you met her. It gives me such peace of mind to know that you and others are helping her since I cannot be there as often as I would like. Once again thank you and hello from Oregon!!❤
Awe I love this!! ❤️ maybe there’s a chance I did get to meet her!
I have worried about this before and found I was spending my life saying “sorry I haven’t messaged/contacted you” all the time but I am trying to remember now it is a two way street as the guilt I was feeling was getting me down so much.
I’m actually transitioning from the few friendships I had and looking for more stable friends. I used to be a party animal so I’ve realized those friends are fun but don’t contribute to have mental stability.
I love the phrasing of planting seeds for friendship! 💚🌱 15:20
Chelsea, I haven't even started watching the video yet, but I want to take this opportunity to let you know how much I like your videos, your channel is progressing because you give off an honest and genuine vibe, without filters, I'm also starting my 30's and I can relate a lot about what you convey about not fully knowing what you are doing or if you are going in the right direction and how overwhelming it is to make certain decisions. You are a very pretty girl but the best thing about you is that you are authentic despite being exposed to being judged by strangers on the internet, that takes courage and is rare in most people. uhhhh and I hope your coffee talks come back and become a section from time to time.
Low maintenance friendships are such a blessing. They weather so many storms in adulthood and even if you don't get to talk to them or see the friend, you know they are out there and they support you. Just the best.
Love the new glasses, looking so sharp!
Recently found your channel ! Thank you so much for posting and for being an inspiration. You’re extremely motivating and because of you I won’t give up. Thank you for showing that not everything has to be extremely aesthetic. While I do enjoy those kind of NYC videos it is also not possible for most people. Keep going Chelsea you’re doing great. I hope to one day also be an inspiration ❤thank you for inspiring me. Virtual Hugs !
Hi Chelsea! I've been really enjoying all of your videos :) I'm 30 something too and it's been so much to relate haha. I like you said "sometime just plant the seed and let the universe take it from there". Feel like that's what I needed to hear today!! Thanks so much and take care
I’ve become so very introverted over the years and love to hibernate, but oh how your fun videos make me yearn to get out there again like the old days! Uh, Juliana’s apartment? Chef’s kiss!! 🙌 A cozy and chic oasis for the bonding of friends, for sure. And that tea shop is calling my name!! Ah, NYC…how dare you go on without me. But deep down I’m so glad it does for all the people like you who keep her alive and kicking. Big hugs to you, Chelsea, for the volunteering you do and the walks that take us through your world, even if just room to room. Clink, clink! ☕️❤️☕️
Optimistic and very encouraging vlog ☀️
very happy to see a post from you!! even happier that you seem to really be focusing on watering your life and i’m so excited to see how full it becomes. much love from texas!
Sometimes I feel a little lonely as well. I live in a semi rural area and have retired. The last several years I helped my sister care for my mom until she passed. I've had a couple surgeries, and during the holidays, for some reason I didn't really want to connect with anybody outside my immediate family. So I'm going to think about ways I can make more connections outside of my immediate family. You have inspired me. And I still love that color of your kitchen by the way. And your glasses are so cute. I look forward to every single one of your vlogs. You just keep it real and that's really what matters to me.
5:14 you had me at save the tortoises. 😻😻😻😻😻
As an only child, I tend to be OK on my own to an extent. I think I require time alone to "charge" myself back up. I retired and moved from where I had made friends for many years. Now I'm back near where I grew up, living in the country. Primarily I communicate with some of my friends from where I worked but have not made any real connections since moving here in 2018. I did attend my first water color/Journaling class yesterday which I really enjoyed...stepping out of my comfort zone did feel good and I just need to "shove" myself out the door far more often...thank you for sharing your anxieties with us!!...there are so many of us who can really identify with what you are going through!!
I feel you with the social life. I'm an introvert as well with TONS of hobbies. I just like to spend my weekends knitting. But as I'm also a freelance photographer, I don't have co-workers and work from home. So it can get lonely, so I actively need to seek out my friends every once in a while. I still have friends from 10 years ago or so, which I'm grateful for! But lots of them have moved and have kids nowadays, so it's not the same as it was. But I still appreciate them lots ❤
That being said: I love LOVE Julie's apartment! Love her style :D (I think she was called Julie?)
Chelsea! This is my first time commenting on your channel, but I've been excitedly following ever since your very inspiring NYC Marathon video ❤ I find your work so comforting because I relate to you SO much. I'm 33, living alone in NYC (also moved here when I was 25 and worked in restaurants for years), making videos for a living, very unsure of what the future holds.
I naturally lean introvert, but ever since a big breakup in 2020, I've put myself out there and made a handful of incredible new friends who feel like family now. There is no shortage of really cool people in this city who also feel a bit lonely after the pandemic and are looking for connection. I found my newest besties while working on video shoots, protesting, hanging in a local dive bar, annnd on the Camino de Santiago. All very random, but fated, I think 🤗🥳
Rooting for you and this new phase of your life 💖
I used to volunteer before the pandemic. Now because of you, I’m going to get back on the volunteer train. It’s so satisfying mentally and physically to help others without expecting anything in return, just being a decent human being helping others. You are inspiring, whether you feel you are or not. Good time you out and about! Goddamn Julie is so cool, her apt is bangin’!
8:39 I deliver for Meals on Wheels in my town & it’s one of my favorite things. I mostly deliver to seniors & they are the sweetest ever. I have the same route each time and you get to know the people. I just LOVE it!!
I have been going through the same issue as to where did all of my friends go? I used to be a social butterfly in my 20s and now I just stay at home watching RUclips..I have experienced some loss that has caused me to shut off and to be honest it changed my outgoing personality..I am having such a hard time making new friends which is why I can differently relate to the content in this video ..I love your glasses and I am going to purchase a pair after I get my new eye exam next week..Take Care ❤. Btw,I miss snow enjoy it .
Yes! Im 38 and i live in a rural area on the west coast of Ireland. I have good friends but they either dont live close by or are in relationships and dont have time to meet up. I love where i live and the nature aspect (im an artist) but the only social life i have is work nights out or meeting with friends (maybe once a month). I have very little in common with most people in my area and it is very irritating. I think sometimes i would love to move to a city like new york where theres a lot more diversity and culture! I also live with daily anxiety, but you're doing so well! A change in mindset can do wonders for your own wellbeing and it's a constant work in progress ❤❤
Hi Chelsea! As an introvert, I totally get what you said and I feel the same. Usually, I get so anxious when I have to have a social interaction that it kind of worries me. I've been unemployed for a while so I think I missing my few social skills lol. But, as you said, we need to put ourselves out sometimes, because at the end of the day, we feel amazing after having a nice social interaction.
I had the same group of friends my whole life. Until I moved permanently out west. I tried to keep them going but old people are grouchy🤣. I joined a private work out club, a church, went to the same coffee shops etc. I’m outgoing but after 12 years on and off here I’ve never met a person to hang with. Like you said, people have established their groups. Like cement. I go alone everywhere. Smile, chat, listen, give my number out, never hear from them, but I’m still out there. I like myself, I like my dogs, I like my RV and taking off alone with my dogs. I guess I’m doomed to be alone😆. Love your content btw. And your volunteering, which I have not done
I'm 30 living in brooklyn and I'm in a super similar spot socially! Caroline Winkler (another vlogger) recently talked about this in a video, and she recommended using Bumble BFF, so I've been trying that recently! Haven't met with anyone, but I've been surprised to see how many cool ladies are on there who are in a friendship rut and looking to meet new people-even just swiping through has made me feel less alone in this predicament.
Your videos are the epitome that life is a journey and not a destination 🩷
And you have us!!! We love ya Chelsea.❤ I so wanted to watch this last night but was stuck at the hospital with my son and I lent him my headset so he didn't drive everyone nuts with his games 😂 You bring up so many amazing points in this vlog. I left Canada and moved to England at 37 with 2 kids. Really knew no one. Being an introvert like yourself I was like "hellllllllo squirrels in the park, lets be friends" 👋🏻🐿🥹 I really had to step out of my comfort zone which was so challenging as it was a totally different culture and in some areas, accent 🥴 Thank you for taking us along for adventures in NYC. Thank you for sharing with us. Challenges us and gets us thinking about things. I truly appreciate you Chelsea ❤
I am definitely introverted…Happiest in my own place…or hanging out with my pup…But, I do agree..we all need to plant seeds if we want new people in our lives…Chelsea..Have a lovely weekend 💕🤗👍🌸
The music in this video is lovely and calming. Volunteering during the pandemic really helped me feel useful and stretched that social/ human interaction muscle that this introvert so often times lets wither. Thank you for sharing your perspective on what you are experiencing, Chelsea. Your honesty helps me not feel so out of sorts about what I am going thru myself. 💖
This video made me happy. I feel like I have lost my social life. What I once use to enjoy doesn’t make me excited anymore but I’m realizing it’s okay, I’ll find my way eventually.
Sometimes I have the same thoughts and want to commit to getting out more and being more social, but I have to watch how much I commit to otherwise I get burned out!! I have to remind myself even getting coffee or lunch with a friend once or twice a month is better than nothing!
Love your glasses!! 👓 My friend lost 50% of her hair from covid in 2020. She cut her hair shoulder length after she got a soft curl perm to give her fullness so she wouldn't have to use a hot straightner or dryer. It's amazing how much her hair grew in...in a year. 😊❤
I lost 50% of my eyesight and my hair from the Covid jab. It’s just awful what we’ve put into our bodies.
@32446 She got covid before the vaccine was out. Sorry to hear about your situation. 😔
@@BusWill2006Oh it breaks my heart to read about our loss of vision. I’m so sorry. The so called “vaccine” has cause to much sickness. The plandemic has harmed mankind in many ways. Take care of yourself.
Hey Chelsea! You showed up on my recs this week. Absolutely love your content! Thanks for all your time! I've always wanted to live in New York and you give the closest thing and make it so honest and true.....
Super random! But you have such high cheekbones and I love them! They’re so cute. Your smile really makes them standout.
I noticed when you were doing your deliveries to seniors. 😊
You’re so wise and evolved! There was a period of time in my very late 20s after complete upheaval with my first stabilizing step being to get a job with very regular hours and then chaotic advertising hours when I volunteered in NYC. It actually was quite memorable. An old man made me a ring out of a dollar when I went to play bingo with seniors at the Bialystoker center. They were so competitive it was a hoot! Then with zero training I helped coach people through interviews and one man was so appreciative, I got the impression he needed practice speaking English so now I want my retirement career to be teaching ESL, I wish it paid my NYC bills otherwise I’d do it now. About ten years later I did a church soup kitchen singles event which was really odd with the religious stuff going on and I didn’t meet any guys but I felt very much awakened to the needs of working poor and homeless in the city. It is definitely worth it putting ourselves out there! I wish my friendships didn’t falter when friends had kids and went to the suburbs and then even distance happened with NYC based friends without kids during COVID so I need to reflect on what’s healthy growing apart vs negligence in sustaining a friendship.
I've found what you said about being alone very interesting, that you feel good on your own, and that you don't put your happiness in other people. That's so wise! And I envy you for that, that's a part of me I have to work on. Thanks for sharing 😊
It's so nice to see you finding balance in your life. I, like you, tend to spend my time in solitude. I love being alone. But sometimes you need to be physically in the presence of humans.
I used to always be a very social person until I started working from home and moving to a new state, so i don’t even know where to begin with meeting ppl/friends , thanks for the inspiration ,love ur personality ❤ this Is my sign to start being more social!
Chelsea! I hear you about enjoying solitude….i am the oldest of 10 children and we lived in Chicago (in the city). We were packed in that little three bedroom house. I love being alone even though I have been married for decades. I like Me most of the time….😅
Great to see you out and about. The walk through the West Village was wonderful (despite the weather.
And thanks for the Vivaldi!
Great vlog, yes! Socializing is hard for me, most days I can’t be bothered especially during winter weather