Escaping the Anxiety/Burnout/Depression Cycle
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- Опубликовано: 5 окт 2024
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I’m currently working with a couple of clients who all get stuck in this pattern of anxiety, try to keep super busy to avoid feeling anxious, and then burn out and end up depressed. I’ve seen this pattern in my family and in a lot of my clients, so from what I can tell it’s a pretty common way that anxiety turns into depression. In this video, you’re going to learn how to identify and replace this pattern with a more helpful, sustainable approach. So let’s take a look at each of those stages.
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Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC, and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.
About Me:
I’m Emma McAdam. I’m a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I have worked in various settings of change and growth since 2004. My experience includes juvenile corrections, adventure therapy programs, wilderness therapy programs, an eating disorder treatment center, a residential treatment center, and I currently work in an outpatient therapy clinic.
In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.
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When I burn out and sleep 12-14 hrs a day, I get sad because I think “why can’t I be normal like most people”.
Julie Ann, Time to develop your mental muscles. Meditation is the permanent way to a relaxed and stress free life because it reprogrames the mind. Enter "Alternate nostril breathing meditation videos" on Google search and do the simple meditation for 10 to 15 minutes if possible twice a day. Also read the benefits of alternate nostril breathing meditation. It can also be done sitting on a chair. Best wishes. Do meditation daily to enjoy a relaxed life. Best wishes--Shyaaam Sir,--Life Coach. God has given us life to be happy.
Shyaaam Meneen Thank you
This could be a sign of high functioning depression or serious adrenal fatigue just saying
Madrid thank you. I suspected adrenal fatigue. I’m not sad, so it doesn’t feel like depression.
@@yungkoops ,Could you please explain what high functioning depression is?. Just wondering, because I feel sad on a regular basis, but try to function.For example:I do my best,for the most part ,to uplift others;try not to be"A Debbie Downer ".Yet I still do feel
This hustle culture and high performance drain the life force out of us 😫
Yeah, and it’s not worth it!
Progress is great, but if it’s not sustainable it’s worth NOTHING.
Well maybe not so much the culture itself but our reaction to the culture. When you know you have the freedom to not get swept up in it, or only dip in for as much as is good for you, it doesn’t look so bad.
@@creative45630 your right 👍☺️
What worked for me, is to realize the absurdity of comparing myself with others.
If you take a step back and think about it, our culture of competition and gain does not really make anyone happy, quite the opposite.
I know it's easier said than done, but once i detached myself from that idea, i began to see the things i can be grateful of.
I believe some of it is escaping from dealing with anxiety. I imagine these people tell themselves, "I'm doing something constructive. I am not using drugs or alcohol".
I've been through this cycle a couple times, but it always leaves me wondering if my job is the issue. I'm good at anticipating when things get too much, but employers always try to push you beyond your boundaries.
I feel the exact same
I feel you on this one. I’ve signed up for some classes as step 1 to changing my career in the medium term. I’ve also made an agreement with myself to log off at a certain time every day (after I’ve put in 8 hours at work) and redirect the overtime effort into my studies. I’ve noticed it’s easier to get out of bed knowing I have a liberation plan…it doesn’t feel so hopeless anymore.
And parents😔
I'm in that position again with my work. One of my colleagues is on leave and I have all of her work plus my own. I have several managers to respond to who all want their work to be my priority. We have hired someone but she doesn't start for a few weeks. I'm really close to burning out and feel I have no control over my work priorities.
@@MelodyProsser I'm in this exact position a lot of the time. Constant staff shortages and managers who want you to work miracles. Upset in current work force issues has made it even worse. One might think of finding another job, but then would a person just run into the same thing elsewhere the way things are ...? Hard to say.
My parents used to fuel my anxiety since I was a child, and at one point, in the burnout stage, my mother told me to my face that I was a failure, just when I was fighting with my own thoughts of being a failure. It's even more difficult to overcome anxiety when the environment you live in is constantly fueling it.
Realize that most people project what they feel about themselves onto others. Don’t take anything personal
Was it badly worded or passive aggressive do you think?
wow, that's toxic. eek! hope you can find the support the heal this mistaken understanding
@@sillygirl1139 Badly worded? No. Those were her exact words ("you are a failure"). And then she kicked me out of the house. Fortunately, I had a friend I could live with at the time.
@@giggle9044 how awful, I'm sorry. It's very sad when ppl don't show up for us in the right ways 😔 I'm glad your friend did though at least x
“If I only tried harder” is my middle name!!
How's it going?☺️ Are doing any better as of today?
I do this all the time it's my automatic response to burnout
Your new middle name could be "work smarter and kinder, not harder"!
Mine too
I just got into an anxiety attack and i did everything i could to google something to calm myself down, I feel better listening to this. I’m not alone I know i’m not :(. I am normal. This is okay.
I had an anxiety attack doing homework while thinking about workout and how insufficient I am, that was really awful, after get some sleeps it back to normal, like she said I'm back to phase one
I worked myself too hard and it gives me a great GPA and decent physique, but my workout made my body posture asymmetrical, many works didn't pay off like it should I debt myself if I ever good enough or meant for this, all the burden just really shattered me inside in this quarantine, I felt you on a personal level, I wish to be normal
@@whoknows7485 You aren't alone. I am dealing with this anxiety and living alone with no support in a city that I don't feel safe due to a crime that I experienced recently. I wish I had friends I could reach out to.
No one acts if they want the depression part.
That’s exactly what happened for me and I feel the same. We are in this together ❤️
I'm drowning in anxiety because I can't have a break. School is driving me nuts, there's so much pressure and stress, I have so many things to study for and so much homework, I can't have a break because I'll get left behind and fail the course. It's not that I don't want to learn. Ugh, I just want this pain to end, it hurts so much physically and mentally and I can't stop it....
When I feel this way, I make a 2-column list. Left side: This Stuff is Stressing Me Out. Right side: What I CAN do about it. This exercise reduces my feelings of overwhelm. I do what I can for the items in my control. Take care.
How are you as of today?☺️
I felt this way every single semester of college and was always so far behind my peers. I completely stopped doing my major after I graduated because of the burn out, so if you’re looking for advice I would say this: don’t worry about falling behind. Don’t compare yourself to others. Compare yourself to the last project you did or last test you passed. My best friend just finished school after 8 years lol! People go at their own paces, it’s okay to ease up your work load next semester if you have to. I know how stressful it is, but you can’t pour from an empty cup! Take care
Ditto...pandemic burnout too...
Can't relate more 😔
the thing is... i dont over-work, i procrastinate and still burn-out
Same
Same here too
My anxiety stemmed from being a people pleaser. Always saying Yes. Always agreeing with folk. Always putting on different masks to mould myself into other characters many times a day. Now I'm ME. I say No. I upset people (they get over it). I'm tougher. I get more respect. I now have more energy to enjoy myself.
When anxiety hits me its like my body is my own hell. My thoughts go insane, then i get overwhelmed with fear because this thoughts are not "mine" then i cannot eat, sleep i feel like the worst person in world. 3 relapses in 15 years. So then i decided to learn everything about brain, depression, anxiety. I've read thousand books. This helped me a lot.
@malamaja1986 of the books you read, what are the top 5 that have helped you the most.
@@jalex5200 The Female Brain - Louann Brizendine, Behave - Robert Sapolsky, A General Theory of Love - - Dr. Lewis, Amini i Lannon, Undoing Depression - Richard O'Connor, The Brain the Story of you - David Eagleman
@Malamaja wishing you healing. Any books you would recommend?
@@rockymountaingirl6472 she listed a group of her top 5 :)
@@CBReptiles1 Thank you!! :)
That’s all we GenXers were ever told. Try harder. Apply yourself. You can only double down so many times before you get fried. It’s actually comforting to know someone has identified this pattern and offers solutions.
What's bad is the fact that some people are giving 150% but they can't do everything. As someone with ADD "try harder" doesn't work for us because we're trying to keep up in a neurotypical world.
My mother tells me 'well maybe you're trying too hard".....
Psychedelic mushrooms completely helped me get out of addiction and depression. It totally rewired my mind. Honestly, they worked better than antidepressants.
Psychedelic mushrooms healed me from severe ptsd that I suffered for years. Truly magical
I've been looking to try some recently, but I can't find anywhere to source.
Doc.coby is your guy.
Is he on Instagram????
Yeah
If you're watching this video and feeling like you're at the end of your rope, please know that you're not alone. It's okay to reach out for help, whether that's through therapy, medication, or just talking to a friend. It can be a long and difficult journey, but there is hope and healing on the other side. Thank you to the creator for sharing their story and shedding light on this important topic.
I can't say enough good things about Dr.hansenrosario. Their research on the benefits of psilocybin-containing mushrooms for mental health is groundbreaking
It's rare to find someone doing such important work in the mental health field. Dr.hansenrosario is a true visionary.
Dr.hansenrosario ships?
Yes, he ships discreet and anonymous
Dr.hansenrosario
My brother took his own life we tried to help him he felt sad lost a lot of weight did not to eat depression and anxiety are not good now we are left with the pain I cry for him every day
😥❤❤
Teresa Nieto, Time to develop your mental muscles. Meditation is the permanent way to a relaxed and stress free life because it reprogrames the mind. Enter "Alternate nostril breathing meditation videos" on Google search and do the simple meditation for 10 to 15 minutes if possible twice a day. Also read the benefits of alternate nostril breathing meditation. It can also be done sitting on a chair. Try to be still and avoid shaking too much. Best wishes. Do meditation daily to enjoy a relaxed life. Best wishes--Shyaaam Sir,--Life Coach. God has given us life to be happy.
Sincere condolences for your loss 💜
I lost my brother 3 yrs ago from suicide. He stayed to himself and distance himself from the family and we couldn't never get in touch with him. We would just leave his wife to be alone for days and weeks. We have to be there for them and let them know that we still love them no matter what, even when you think the message not getting thru it really is a powerful thing! I think about him everyday and still question it everyday i guess because of denial but i know he's not suffering no more and in a better place 😘
@@brandonbggray6821 Yes there in a better place God Bless You are love ones are happy in God Glory until we meet again 🕊
Ever since I join therapy in a nutshell my life has been better ... u are inspiration dear thx
Mine too
Absolutely... She’s really gifted! ❤️
She's great
this made me realize that i'm not so hopeless after all. this cycle keeps repeating everytime that it actually damages my relationships. i will eventually break this :)
“Try to Build your self worth on something you can control like your integrity or values instead of the accomplishment”… Love this! So in the case of her client training for the marathon, turning up and training are the achievement, not race day.
With work - turning up on time versus turning up with everything perfectly done.
With weight loss - eating well at a meal versus focusing on how much weight you HAVE to lose.
With Xmas - focussing on turning up and being there (in the moment) vs everything being done and perfect.
I feel seen. I’ve been through this cycle twice, in my late 20s and then in my early 30s. Thank you for this video.
Going through this now and i think ive finally admitted to myself! 😏 hard when youre so used to being able to push through difficult times .
@@reeree6686 How are you now? Be careful what you feed your mind. To feel better reduce negative thoughts and overthinking. Avoid comparing, reduce negative social media and avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Your breathing is closely related to the brain [mind] and gives relief from stress-anxiety. It is very simple. To relax sit on a chair or lie down, neck straight, eyes closed, avoid moving too much and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Never meditate with expectations but with awareness. Don’t fight your thoughts. With daily practice the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Observe your breath sensations before sleep, in college, at work, taking a walk, when reading, -------anytime-anywhere. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a better life. Best wishes--Counsellor.
This is my favorite channel right now. I’m sick of living in constant fear/anxiety.
Me too. I’m so sick of it and I want to kick it to the curb at this point. I’m done with it
Me too. I have high anxiety right now and I have to work so hard to calm myself down. I fell like I can’t do it anymore.
We sorta have no choice but to do whatever it takes to feel better Again.
You dont need to anxiety is your friend its part of you when you realise this you will enjoy life
@@khydo the more you fight the stronger it gets when you run from it you are basically telling the body that you were in danger
i related to this way too much. did not realize all the signs until I finally reached the last part - which is absolute mental breakdown and meltdown - depressive episodes. i was knocked out and have been sleeping for so many hours for the past few weeks. did not realize that hey my body and mind is telling me i need to slow down - until i reached the last stage. it hit me. full blown.
I have been stuck in this cycle for too damn long. Thank you for this video.
Oh my jesus, this is my life in a nutshell. I have done this so many times I dont understand why I keep doing it. I just recently attended three reading clubs, two of them with meet-up every week, a weekly volunteer meeting for an organisation, a full time study and a part time job and working out on the side - and then ofcourse taking time out for girlfriend, family and friends. It was just too much, and I have repeated this cycle for so many years. The hard part about going into the burnout phase is how endless it suddenly seems and how extremely inconvenient it is for the more regular things you still have to do. And then as soon as I feel okay again I blast away with thousand things to do. I feel like I am sprinting straigth into a wall and then onto the next lol. I am glad someone is putting words into this, because this is so spot on. I feel like I am a regular customer in burning out, so I know it will pass. I hope everyone is doing okay. Let's not do this again!
Thank you Emma!
" a little anxious "... no. Try blinding, devouring, internalised FEAR.
Good luck with everything try Kabot Zinn & MBSR
❤
Yeah... the kind that causes a couple of years off work ... not a couple of weeks taken voluntarily ... not quite so easy to recover from or climb out of.
Ever tried Ashwagandha, Rhodiola, Kratom, phenibut (occasional use) L-lysine?
It beats the benzos or booze!
All the best!! I honeslty know all to well what that fear is.
Yesterday I nearly broke up with my girlfriend. Again. Which was literally the only thing going somewhat good in my life. Turns out we were both just keeping our mouth shut on how much shit has piled up. And even though now she claims to love me and has the desire to stay, my depression hit its peak.
I don't know how to deal with it anymore. I feel so helpless and lost and everything in my life feels like its neigh impossible to do.
I think I have never been this depressed in my life and I don't see any way out of it anymore.
I feel so impaired and I have never been this broken in my entire life.
I feel like I’m stuck. I have everything to be happy but I’m still not. I’m having mental and physical issues. I feel like “Ok, I’m done”. It holidays time so I’m trying to recover and I don’t do a single thing to kinda rest. However, I feel exhausted. I remember September and October. I was so happy, I worked a lot but still, I had a lot of energy and motivation. I wish I could go back to normal.
To be honest, this video is like a hope for me. It’s a sign that it’s a high time to learn how to get back my emotional stability.
Thank you♥️
it’s been a year are you better?
@@INDSNSKRT I’m better mentally but I got asthma so now I’m suffering from choking👍🏻
I'm completely burned out . I'm not a creature of change and these times are changing .
Blues Take some action. Meditation heals anxiety as it reprogrammes the mind. Watch alternate nostril breathing meditation videos on Google and do it for 5 to 10 minutes if possible twice a day. You can sit on a chair or on the ground and do it. Inhale-exhale slowly and feel the relaxation flowing through your mind and body. Negative thoughts will reduce. Shyaaam Sir, Mentor. Make meditation a daily habit.
She is one of the finest therapist over internet :) Everything truly makes sense.
You saved me with this video. Just could not go through another cycle ... now Im prioritising as my first step. Thank you
Please do some videos on workplace ptsd! I love your videos on depression and anxiety but I feel as though they are symptoms of this larger issue many Americans face - workplace ptsd. Would love your insight
Wow, I just went to your page for this exact reason, and this video was waiting at the top. I believe you walk in the Spirit. God has called you to help heal the anxious 🧠 brain in such a time as this. God Bless you and your family, Emma.
What I never realized was how difficult it was going to be to find a good therapist....
Thank you for all the work that you do. Your videos have saved my life more than once!
You are the therapist which we all need but cannot afford. Thank you for these videos, it helps a lot! 😊
I always smile when I see ‘TiaN’ in my subs has posted. *edit :Plus, Emma’s voice is so relaxing.
People are bombarded with So many ideas ToDay..that our Expectations get way out of line. We need to step back and be Realistic and Reasonable about ourselves and others. We are just human after all! Some people have been given more talents than others and we need to stop Comparing ourselves to others. You are one of a Kind!
I love your channel. You are that type of therapist that is also like a dear friend that cares for you, not only as a patient , but also as a human being.
We really appreciate what you’re doing and how you’re doing it.
Was exactly in this with my job. Started listening to Abraham Hicks, going out to cafes, buying flowers for myself, going to nail salons, being more playful, eating and sleeping more, applied for student exchange, doing my own lectures. Hoping this will help over time, because pushing harder never works.
Oh god my whole life described in an 8min video...
As a therapist myself, who can’t therapy herself, this was the most helpful 8 mins. Looking up burnout alone wasn’t helpful, but in the context of the anxiety burnout and depression it all makes sense. Thank you! Help breaking down and identifying the anxiety part would help even more
Hello I understand you alot
This video is so accurate to describe what I'm going through right now, from trying to be perfect at everything, using fear as motivator but end up feel like failure, sleep 12+ hours a day, even to feeling suicide is the only way out. People around me said its a regular and didn't take it seriously whenever i feel like i need help. Thanks for your video 👌
i cant really cry when i want to thank you 😢.. i went through this cycle the entirety of 2020 and i was struggling so much i was trying to to improve and using some of the solutions mentioned here it was trial and error ..to hear some one put it so clearly in one video..makes me believe im not the only one struggling with this..thank you😢❤
I saw one of your videos for the first time last Saturday about Catastrophising. I subscribed immediately because I talked to alot of people and no one has ever got what I've been feeling and thinking for the past 4+ years. You're amazing 👏. 😊
I have a special notebook for these videos.
How old are you?
🙏🏼
that's a good idea!
Heidi Rigault, Time to develop your mental muscles. Meditation is the permanent way to a relaxed and stress free life because it reprogrames the mind. Enter "Alternate nostril breathing meditation videos" on Google search and do the simple meditation for 10 to 15 minutes if possible twice a day. Also read the benefits of alternate nostril breathing meditation. It can also be done sitting on a chair. Try to be still and avoid shaking too much. Best wishes. Do meditation daily to enjoy a relaxed life. Best wishes--Shyaaam Sir,--Life Coach. God has given us life to be happy.
@@shyaaammeneen63 thank you. I will try. This week was rough.!
No matter how fast you will run (no matter what you will do), you will never escape from yourself (your feelings, generally all you). Meditate, stay connected with yourself, take care and listen to your intuition, start journaling, keep proper order in your life and in your surroundings. Maybe it will take some time but after some day/weeks/months you will get better but you need to do it. If you are trying then you are winning. Without trying, looking you loose. And next time think before you will drop yourself into too many works or too heavy works. One by one, step by step thats how you climb ladder and make great things. And you can do it without drugs.
I love your channel I've been binge-watching all your old videos... I've been an agoraphobic but I've been using all the stuff I've learned from you and have got out of the house a bunch this week...
That’s awesome!
@@TherapyinaNutshell I read somewhere (or watched) an analogy of how anxiety is like an animal stuck in a cage and rattling the cage to escape. Meanwhile the keys are lying in the cage and all it has to do is to pick up the keys and learn to open the lock, rather than rattling the cage, which actually frightens it more. *If* this is a well-known analogy in the literature / popular discourse, can you make a video about it? Unless you've already made one, of course. Thanks.
As a single mother I've tried to figure out what's wrong with me. This is it!!!! Thank you. I'll watch this again
Thank you so much for creating this video. I started my morning crying and when I went searching for answers your video came up and you have no idea how much it helped because it put so much in perspective for me. I didn’t even realize this was a common cycle others go through. I appreciate this so much
You’re my absolute favorite. It’s like a free councilor!
Listening to what you’re saying here, I feel a sense of clarity, as I’m currently working towards breaking away from this cycle.
I was in 10th grade when COVID started, and being an international student in Beijing, I was under the impression that I had built a good routine for myself. Being in my hometown and away from my home abroad took a toll on me that I dealt with by working my ass off that ultimately lead me to a burnout that I would’ve never thought would affect me the way it did.
When I began 11th grade last year, we’re lucky to be in good condition in Beijing, only having to learn online last February- whilst some people were yet to be back or move to China, it took me about 6 weeks before this cycle repeated itself. It got to a point I believed I was crazy and had the really bad thoughts, but could not see a psychiatrist until somewhere in January. I remember getting to a point, that as shit began getting serious when it came to my academics, I experienced really bad executive dysfunction. Unable to comprehend anything. I became unable to keep working, and somehow I miraculously got through last year. Right now I’m working towards recovering thanks to the support team I’ve got. Starting 12th grade I’ve been struggling to get anything done, and what you described in this video made me realize I was constantly pushing myself to do more and more, because I wanted to feel like a decent person. Having ADHD, I’ve constantly felt inadequate my whole life, and I didn’t realize that I wasn’t listening to myself well enough, despite being considerably too self aware for my own good.
Thank you for sharing this!
I am in that burnout phase right now, completely adrenally fatigued! Worry about money led to weeks of working too many hours to get my reselling business happening and feeling anxious when I tried to sleep and then not getting enough sleep and now .... I'm so exhausted and migrainey that I'm in a stuck pattern of fatigue and anxiety. And then it led to a muscle tension dysphonia flare up, which is making me feel even MORE anxious. Excellent video. Thank you!
This made years of therapy finally click. I can see how it all connects. Thank you so much!
I'm in this cycle a lot I've never seen therapy in a nutshell before but I like this and need more in my life.
ruclips.net/video/bn_WVOHNKYs/видео.html
Thanks emma, i really need this..i am absolutely in the cycle again and again..
Wow....not sure how this ended up in my feed, but I NEEDED this!
I lost my job a year ago, started my own career, started to take care of my grandma because my grandpa passed away, help my mom out daily, and quickly burned out from multiple things......thanks for making this video! I had no idea so many faced the same things as me
Love this video! Especially when social media sites like Instagram and LinkedIn fuels low self worth and comparison, anxiety (and this cycle) is increasing, I believe. Being aware and intentional really helps, thank you :)
I'm really starting to feel overwhelmed and learning to take action when I do , I'm feeling so much better. Thank you
From the bottom of my heart, thank you so much. Your channel has helped me tremendously.
This whole video is me. I'm so relieved to come across it.
I feel so lucky and grateful to have found your channel. Your videos have been helping me a lot. You are an amazing & compassionate person. Thank you for the hard work you put into these videos. I appreciate you!!
For me this cycle started 7 years ago, at that time i cursed myself for being lazy and not meeting people's expectations. I still feel anxious whenever I think about studying, I am anxious about learning new skills even when it doesn't have anything to do with grades or exams. I think Everyone expecting me to be perfect is what started this. Many times I felt like I was doing better but then it got worse again. Thank you for making this video so that i can understand what's really happening, I hope i can get out of this cycle soon.
I love how you simplify concepts that seem so overwhelming especially if struggling. Thank you!
Thank you for all the explanation!...And your voice is so soothing!
Hey I have watched so many do your videos and they do give me some hope I can break out of my anxiety and trauma brain. It’s just right now it’s really hard because I’ve been retriggered about 2 months ago and these 2 months have been hell. I’m in the depression stages and have been put on meds but they make me feel so slow and dumber down :( I’m just trying to feel good again and be who I am because I miss that person. I’m supposed to start emdr soon which I was told is good for trauma. I always feel like the exception, like I’m the one person that cannot be helped for some reason. Your videos do at least calm me down for a bit as I watch them.
me too! 7years ago i got panic attacks but i was fine and suddenly this week i think the thought of me moving to a new country to a new school (boarding school) made me have many panic attacks. this week id get like 1-4panic attcaks a day and i dont know how to stop it.
Jessica Aitken, Time to develop your mental muscles. Meditation is the permanent way to a relaxed and stress free life because it reprogrames the mind. Enter "Alternate nostril breathing meditation videos" on Google search and do the simple meditation for 10 to 15 minutes if possible twice a day. Also read the benefits of alternate nostril breathing meditation. It can also be done sitting on a chair. Try to be still and avoid shaking too much. Best wishes. Do meditation daily to enjoy a relaxed life. Best wishes--Shyaaam Sir,--Life Coach. God has given us life to be happy.
You're not alone hun 💞 never alone. I can relate to everything you've said. You'll return to your normal self, there's always hope. It's just hard to feel it in the middle of the storm x
highscool student here! this is so prevalent, especially among gifted students. we are pressured to do absolutely everything, all of the AP's, the afterschool clubs, sports, extra curriculars, SAT prep, collage planning, just to name a few. as a high achieving student who also happens to have anxiety, this becomes an extremely slippery slope, which i've fallen into. i never heard about burnout before i started to do my own research. this honestly should be taught in schools, maybe so many kids wouldn't end up so burn out (coming from someone in the depression stage) thank you for giving me clarity!!!
What always frustrated me. And made me feel how unfair the world was. Was how ive seen folks that would be locked in on their work or hobby/passions and NEVER seem experience a burn out. And what was more shocking was how while even tired from lack of sleep or even low will. They'd still troop along like its nothing! And even if there was any burn out. They would seem to recover like it never happened!
I know most cases this can be very detrimental to one's health. But it always made me so envious of them. And furious with my own self. Because it just made it feel that my "love" for my work was just not enough. And it'd create more stress when even if resting for months to nearly a year. Im still unable to pull out of this dive!
It angers me. And makes me even more stressed as this is how I make my living! This is how I pay bills and eat! Then I start cursing myself for not being like those folks I mentioned above. I just hate it. I cant stand it. And no amount of rest, exercising, changing habits, sleep, meditation, medication and talking has ever helped resolve it. Or keep it out of my life.
I feel so seen with this video. I didn’t realise how much I was doing this. I’m constantly trying to balance everything, be good to everyone, do everything… and it comes from a place of deep rooted low self worth but also just how hectic life is!! I cannot wait to slow down my life when I finish college, and hopefully keep it that way for the rest of my life if at all possible. I’m sick all the time and I still don’t feel good enough.
Thank you so much for this! This has helped me see so much and I’m just grateful to have time to watch this💕
I just found you yesterday and I’ve listened to 3 or 5 or your videos. I told my son about you and how I feel so helped with my thinking already. He said he’s going to listen too. I didn’t know I could stop my own thinking and flip it so to speak. I tried it twice and it worked. I love you so much. Battling depression for years and anxiety for 3. Thank you.
Thank you so much! I'm glad you found this video helpful.
Starts with "Do you ever do that thing...", and my answer is already Yes.
Self-Compassion instead of Self-flagellation. Golden words!
didnt watch the vid, just wanna say how i did it myself
here is how you escape:
- sit down and talk to yourself man
[become your own best friend, know your fears etc and why they're there]
- understand yourself [know why things are the way they are, it's impossible to know everything at first, this is a process, a journey]
- take action [face your fears in order to overcome them, rewire your brain by actively thinking better, change your life for the better: stop doing things that actively harm you or others]
---> all in all: think better, feel better and live better
it is a process that takes TIME PATIENCE AND TRUST IN YOURSELF
good luck everyone
stay true to yourselves, and trust your heart
this is a dark world but every single one of us needs to become a little sparkle, so we can finally shine as a humanity
Excellent video! We are both in our 80's and are all about healthy aging. We continually strive for a strong body & a calm mind. Keep up the good work!
Thank you. I'm so glad you both are finding this information helpful.
Any advice on dealing with anxiety that is triggered by chronic health issues? Most of the time my anxiety is only triggered when I'm not feeling well due to any number of long term symptoms. Thanks so much for all your help. Been watching your videos and I'm starting to understand and do something about my anxiety. Please continue to post videos 🙏
I would also like to know about this
This ♥️
Yes I experience the same thing. I get so anxious and hopeless when I start to feel physical symptoms.
I always get jealous of comments saying thankyou this helped me so much. Not once has any yt video ever helped me in the slightest
How are you doing now?
Thank you so much Emma. Since I found your therapy channel. I can see clearly my anxiety attacks, my fears, I am doing your grounding exercise it's change my life. I can see my different strong side and not being victim as a depressed person. I can feel that I am feeling much better then before. Thank you so much. I usually don't write comments this is my first time, I am writing to someone. Thank you so much. God bless you 🙏 ❤.
Hi Nimisha, me pan marathi ahe. Hope you are doing better. Do you mind connecting for some sharing please.
Spot on. What I have been going through continuously. It just clicked. May have taken a long while without this.
You are an angel sent from Heaven. Thank you so much for all you do Emma.
I got into depression because my parents pressurized me so much related to study... Everytime they would pressurize me and remind me of the bad grades that I got and saying to me that they will change my school if I don't get good grades...
The people who are seeing my comment I'm out of depression but I still cry a lot and I am having a little bit of depression too....Im tired of all this... I even had suicidal thoughts but then I shared all my feelings with my friend who I didn't knew also had depression and anxiety.. I felt a lot better by sharing this to her and felt that some of my burden was finished..im really worried about school now this depression was all because of studies and parents pressure..Now in a week I'm having my final exams of 7th grade and if I don't get good grades my parents told me they will Change my school which makes me cry a lot because I don't wanna leave my friends or go somewhere all alone especially when I have gone through depression it makes me more scared and sad
You just described my normal week days
I’m stay at home mum of 4 … I do Mostly everything in the house while my hubby works full time. One of my sons has severe complex additional needs , with autism and adhd. When the kids are at school o have a good routine and I can cope well but as soon as they are off for the holidays at school ( I’m in the Uk) I end up being exhausted. I was beginning to think my well treated depression was coming back . I was angry and irritable, unable to cope, exhausted, overwhelmed and was crying almost everyday. I phoned my gp who upped my antidepressants. I just felt worse. It wasn’t until I found your video that I realised im burnt out. Exhausted! I have very little help outside the home , it’s really just my husband and myself but knowing that I need time to try and reset a little each day with a break . Im slowly seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.
I try and willpower my way through it all the time...and of course, I end up beating myself up when I can't
Well done. Your ability to summarize the distinct stages within a cycle of mental difficulty was rather beneficial to peice together a 'working' perspective.
Thank you so much!!! You’re helping so many people including myself, you go on my gratitude list most mornings!! Sending love.
Beautiful well written , same here as well
Holy shit I cannot believe how hard this hit home!! My heart is racing and I'm trying not to tear up. I have been in this cycle for YEARS! And I just kept thinking I wasn't trying hard enough or holding out long enough! Thank you so much for this video!!
Thank you so much for making these videos! I look forward to each one.
Been burning out for 4 years, having to keep myself going through house moves, divorce, not seeing my kids, court battles to gain access, self employment during the pandemic, family members dying, meeting then losing the love of my life because of my struggles, losing friends, self confidence and emotional control. Thank you for such a great video, beginning to get back on track, there are good days and bad, but watching videos like this really helps
Mike Elderton, Develop your mental muscles with patience and determination. . Be careful what you feed your mind. To feel better reduce negative thoughts and overthinking. Avoid comparing, reduce negative social media and avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Your breathing is closely related to the brain [mind] and gives relief from stress-anxiety. It is very simple. To relax sit on a chair or lie down, neck straight, eyes closed, avoid moving too much and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Never meditate with expectations but with awareness. Don’t fight your thoughts. With daily practice the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Observe your breath sensations before sleep, in college, at work, taking a walk, when reading, -------anytime-anywhere. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a better life. Best wishes--Counsellor.
@@shyaaammeneen63 thank you so much for such s thoughtful, positive and helpful response, will definitely be taking in all your recommendations having just had another sleepless night. As a result I won't be able to get much work done today as it requires a high level of concentration, patience and steady hands. Thank once again.
@@mikeelderton6539 Agreed. Patience and determination is needed. Since many years I have made it a habit to observe my breath sensations even during my normal activities and I am feeling relaxed and healthy. Anywhere-anytime it can be done. The best part is nobody comes to know that you are doing the breath observing practice as there is no deep breathing or sound. Counting backwards from 50 to 0 is another way to relax and improve concentration. Read my msg and do the practice regularly. Best wishes. Sr. Counsellor.
@@shyaaammeneen63 thank you, I've just been doing it and it has calmed me and helped me focus. Have copied your messages to my phone so I can re-read them for clarity when stressed. Thank you so much
Thank you Emma this is a very helpful video and I am so thankful for this❤️ Please do a how to gain confidence video. I really feel like I’m lacking this lately and my anxiety just gets bigger and bigger because of the lack of self-esteem.:(
Wow you might have just changed my life. It's like your talking directly to me about my problem today. Thank you so much.
I've had anxiety since a child..
My adrenal glands are burnt out.
4 decades of it..
Constantly adrenaline surges/rushed.....
Even a thought can trigger off this viscous cycle....Lost all interest in everything...
@@k31ra77 Have you heard of The DARE Reponse? D = Diffuse, A = Accept, R = Run in to your anxiety, E = Engage back into life. The R is key for my panic and anxiety. I demand more of it. I challenge my panic and anxiety to get worse. This is paradoxical but it works cause it won't get worse. Then I tense up my entire body contracting all of my muscles for 5 seconds, then release. Then take a deep inhalation, hold, and exhale. This is one "rep." I do 3 to 5 of these to release the adrenaline in the body. Then I go engage in something like reading, walking my dog, writing, or whatever. Look up DARE. Hope it works for you and you feel better. Don't let you anxiety trick you into thinking something is wrong with you. NOTHING is wrong. People like us just have a very sensitive nervous system. It gets keyed up by stress and exhaustion. What you resist, persists. What you allow, you transform. Be well!
Dawn Lokki, Time to develop your mental muscles. Meditation is the permanent way to a relaxed and stress free life because it reprogrames the mind. Enter "Alternate nostril breathing meditation videos" on Google search and do the simple meditation for 10 to 15 minutes if possible twice a day. Also read the benefits of alternate nostril breathing meditation. It can also be done sitting on a chair. Try to be still and avoid shaking too much. Best wishes. Do meditation daily to enjoy a relaxed life. Best wishes--Shyaaam Sir,--Life Coach. God has given us life to be happy.
Dawn, Take some action. Meditation heals anxiety as it reprogrammes the mind. Watch alternate nostril breathing meditation videos on Google and do it for 5 to 10 minutes if possible twice a day. You can sit on a chair or on the ground and do it. Inhale-exhale slowly and feel the relaxation flowing through your mind and body. Negative thoughts will reduce. Shyaaam Sir, Mentor. Make meditation a daily habit.
🙏
Your guidance is spot on for me. All related to my job and incompetent boss who has left me to drown in my new job. Unfortunately only way out is for me to look for a new job.
I heard in a podcast that said, “it’s important to live life by design rather than emotion. Basically, sticking to a routine is what allows us to be the healthiest version of ourselves (especially when you're fighting these demons ex. OCD for me).
I’ve had to overhaul how I approach taking care of my brain (exercise, journaling, studying etc) by practising mediocre consistency. Now I try to put in consistent 40-60% effort into my journaling habit - to make sure I do it I began recording it and posting it on my yt channel. After a really bad depression phase I started to believe I couldn’t change and I’d feel that horrible forever.
Historically I have a habit of going too hard, not being able to sustain the Herculean effort, giving up and hating myself. So now I’m trying to give a small, consistent mediocre effort everyday. And its crazy how it adds up. I’m still figuring out how to be a person again, reintegrate into society but right now I have a solid foundation that I’ve never had before.
Sobbing along to this video, wish i could watch it all the time. thank you
Now that we are in quarantine, I was doing fine, my nephew and his parents live right next door, so I was helping to babysit. We would run, we would play with cars, and I was feeling well. My nephew is a 3.7 year old. And right now he got sick with varicella, apparently, it itches him and he cries and it breaks my heart. They are not letting him come over right now as he needs to rest, but for some reason, I myself am feeling very tired and sleepy. He is my little sunshine. He gives light to my life. And knowing he is overwhelmed, well overwhelms me too. :/
For me, it’s worry about my family. I seem to often be living in dread. Depression goes along with it.
Thank you for all your Wisdom. Also I am loving the new lipstick and hair!!💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾
Yep! Red lipstick haha
Amazing video- you talk about something which is very much overlooked when it comes to people with anxiety. The underlying reason behind running and suppressing that stabbing pain of anxiety. Really needed to hear this.
So glad I found this channel!
This was a perfect summary of what I seem to be going through. I feel like I am on an infinite treadmill of work and family responsibilities. I am in this constant state of exhaustion.
Just discovering this at 39, and I have done this since I was ~12. This is exactly what I go through. Thank you so much.
38 and just caught up with you on the realization. Straight torture.
I love your channel. I almost have my msw (may) (so close)! Your videos are informative, approachable, and help to reinforce concepts for me. I like to take the information you present and imagine I’m relaying this same advice to future clients. I think my favorite episodes are when you are working in the garden. Most genuine thank you to you and what you’re doing.
Being shame-based puts me, for one, onto obligatory mode and I become very reactive.
This teaching is a keeper to remind me to "slow down and feel." 💯%